Original subtitles

Ooh, something smells like a stinking skunk up in here.

I won't take that personally.

Oh.

Cora, how long has this milk been in the fridge? I don't know.

Ooh, five more minutes, it'll be yogurt.

Hey, baby, taste this.

Sasha, I'm hungry.

You just ate. That was ten minutes ago.

That boy could put away some food.

Yeah, I seen him eat freezer burn.

Joaquin, we are cleaning out the fridge.

Here, drink water.

Come here, big guy.

Be strong, okay?

See, when a woman says, drink some water, that's her way of telling you,

out of the way.

Okay. Hey, Will and Sasha, I'm going to a party tomorrow night.

Uh, you know, you don't tell us what you're going to do. You ask.

Okay, well, can I go to a party tomorrow night?

Now that's more like it, but the answer is no.

What? Why not?

Honey, because you promised to watch Joaquin. Because we're going to a party.

Start from the beginning. Okay.

In the beginning, I was a baby, just a little lad.

Then I grew up and I was walking to school in snow.

Five miles to the one way. Five miles to the left. Five miles to the right.

Uncle Brown, Uncle Brown. You mean the details about you almost getting killed?

Yeah. Oh, I was crossing the street and there was a bus coming. Okay. And then

the bus was coming about 80 to 100 to 150.

Yes, being a hero has made me quite thirsty.

with Leroy Brown. Not if it's a bill collector looking for him.

I'm Ellsworth Barrington, the man whose life you saved earlier today.

Oh, seven feet tall, huh?

Maybe he shrunk after I saved him, Corby. You never know.

Come on in, sir. Yes, come on in.

Uh, wait a minute. I just saved him. I didn't save all these people.

I'm sorry. I didn't save you guys. I only saved this young man.

My publicist and photographer are here to take your picture for the evening

paper. Shut up! Why you didn't say something? Come on in here, girl.

Oh, I like it. Is that natural rain? That's natural.

Yes, I like it. Come on in here.

Yeah, why y 'all didn't say something?

This is my good side.

But this is my great side. Take my great side.

How you doing? I'm Cora, Mr. Brown's daughter. Good to meet you. Good to meet

you. You must be pretty proud of your father.

Oh, yes.

Did he tell you how he saved me?

Yes, once a...

200 times.

Mr. Brown.

Up and away.

Mr. Brown. I'm taking superhero pictures.

Able to leap.

Mr. Brown.

Go ahead, go ahead.

You hold the push -pull. Mr. Brown, because of your quick thinking and

act, I'd like to present you with this. Oh, you don't have to do that. Shh,

Carter. Speak when you become a superhero. Back up.

Zip it. Stand right there.

Yes. I know $5 ,000 is a mere pittance for saving my life. But it'll do. Yes,

this will do.

Hold on. Take a picture.

Take a picture.

Corby, get out of my picture. This is my picture. Take it again because she was

in it.

You ain't saving nobody.

Because beautiful women carry a rose in their mouth when they tango.

I thought all you old people

did was river dance.

What do you call an old?

Yeah, what you talking about river dance?

I want you to know about this. What's this, baby? Hey. Oh, get up, get up.

What's that called? Uh -huh, uh -huh, yeah.

What's that?

What you got, baby? What you got? What I got? What you got?

Bring it down.

Can't all people do this? What?

What?

Yeah, what you call that?

Embarrassing.

Well, we're going to be embarrassing ourselves all over the dance floor

night.

Yeah, great. Rub it in. You guys will be out having fun while I stay here and

watch this rug wrap.

Brianna, look, I'm sure there are plenty of fun things you can do around this

house.

Like what?

I can cut off all your hair while you're sleeping.

Oh, I'm sorry. You meant fun for both of us.

Well, figure it out, because we are going to be dancing all night till

Too much?

Don't do that tomorrow night.

Come on. You think that was too fresh? That was fresh.

Those are your parents.

Hold on.

Okay.

Hey, bro. Just came from the costume shop. Check it out. I'm going to be the

headless horseman to win that contest.

Oh.

It's a match made in heaven. The headless horseman?

And his brainless date.

You guys have a costume ready for tomorrow night?

No. Will and Sasha are going out, and I have to stay here and watch Chucky.

Will? I mean, the center's just right down the street.

No man can watch himself.

Or I can burn the house down.

The question is, do you feel lucky?

Well, do you, punk?

Oh!

Joaquin!

Look, I'm sorry. We're just gonna have to miss it.

We? Please.

You're going to be sitting at home while I'm drinking fruity drinks to destroy

my neck.

You know what?

Will and Sasha are going to be gone all night.

I'm going.

I'm telling.

Sorry!

You can go, too.

I could, but telling on you is way more fun.

We'll throw in $20.

Deal!

And that's when Leroy Brown...

That's you. That's me. Jumped in front of the bus and saved Ellworth

Barrington's life. That's right.

Wow. I can't believe it. What, that I'm a superhero?

No, that your pudgy little butt can jump.

I was going to give you a little taste of what I'm going to say when I go and

my little salutation, but I'm not going to tell you that.

Okay, okay, okay, Brown. Let me hear your little story. Go ahead. Tell me how

happened. You sure? Yeah.

Undivided attention.

Okay. Picture it.

I was fighting through the wind and through the rain like this.

And I was also fighting a bad chess coach.

And then all of a sudden there was a bus coming 150 ,000 miles an hour.

And this man was standing right there and then I pushed him out the way and

he... That's why I can't stand you and your ugly kids.

You need to get your story straight, hero.

Biddy the beggar, what you want?

You know you can't beg around this hospital.

I ain't begging. I ain't begging. I'm just here to let you know I know you

no hero.

How you figure that?

Because I saved Ellsworth Barrington.

Okay, you saved Ellsworth.

Okay, I think somebody that rocked good whiskey done got to your brain.

You been drinking upside down again?

It's the truth.

Look, I ain't finna fool with you. Everybody already know you ain't nothing

a con order. Okay, listen, all right, you're right, you're right. But I'm

straight up, Brian. Now, look.

That bus was coming right at you, right? I seen it come right at you. Now, what

happened was I pushed you.

All right, you bumped everywhere. You sat down like this.

How's somebody know that? I was there.

Look, pin it down here, man.

Well, you know that because you figured out when I... Look, I read in the paper.

Yes, I read.

I read that you got all the credit for saving Ellsworth.

That's right. Now, look, I don't want no credit, but I could use some of that

reward money.

That's what this is about. You're trying to get money. That's all you want. Now,

come on, look at me. Let me do it with some money.

I wouldn't even ask if it wasn't for my mama. I know she's sick.

She's probably sick of you lying so much. That's what she's sick of.

I'm serious, man.

She's got a bad heart.

Shut up. Yes, I know.

She lost her job.

She's about to lose the house.

Well, why don't you move in with her? My mama don't want no bums in our house.

You're right. You probably put the dumb in bums.

I never gave my mama a reason to be proud of me.

And this is my chance to do something that she could be proud of.

You never wanted to make your family proud?

They proud now because they think I'm a superhero.

And you about to mess that up.

Man, I thought I saved Ellsworth.

Brown. And you could still be the hero.

But Ellsworth gave you that money because he thought you saved his life.

was me.

Now, Brown, I don't go to church often.

You don't never go to church.

You're right to listen.

I just need you to do the right thing.

Man, you make me sick. I know what it is.

Martini's not out.

Last time I saw him, Scooby and Shaggy were chasing him across the dance floor.

It was a good party. I'm glad you made it.

Yeah, me too.

Thanks for your help.

No problem.

Okay. I need to get him to bed before Will and Sasha get home.

Come on, Joaquin. Wake up.

You're so annoying.

Joaquin, do you... Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

What the what?

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Who is that? I don't know, but it's not Joaquin.

Oh, snap.

We left Joaquin at the party.

Oh, man.

We have to take this kid back and go get him. Oh, Lord, we kidnappers.

I next got you by a number that's twice on him. Oh, my God. I'm about to go kill

him. Oh, my God. Okay, we got to move. We got to move. Pick him up.

Pick him up.

Okay, let's go back to the party. I'll get the door.

I can't get through.

Open the door.

Oh, my God.

Back to work, back to work, back to work.

Wait for me.

So much for dancing all night.

Well, next time, why don't you try doing the samba in forage heels and

backwards?

I'm going to go check on the kids, all right? Okay.

You okay?

Yes.

Hey, babe, how about next time we do a dance that doesn't require heels?

They're not upstairs.

Brianna! Bri!

Joaquin! Joaquin! Brianna!

Okay,

could you please call Brianna's cell?

What the what?

Joaquin?

Hi.

Where have you been?

I'm not supposed to... tell you because they'll get Brianna in trouble.

And you know I don't want that.

But she took me to the party without permission.

Okay, so where's your sister?

I don't know.

What do you mean, I don't know?

You didn't go to the party together?

I went to the party with them, but I couldn't find them. And then the karate

told me that Captain Jackie Sparrow and the Headless Horseman left.

So I just walked home.

Okay. She left you out there by yourself.

Is that what you're telling me?

I wasn't scared.

I'm a robot.

Yeah, right. That's cute. Listen here, Mr.

Robot. All right? You're going to be grounded until you can live in space. Go

bed.

Oh, man.

And I would have gotten away with it, too, if it wasn't for those meddling

I am going to strangle her.

Baby, calm down, all right?

Sneaking out of the house is one thing, but, I mean, leaving a little brother

like that? No, I'm going to strangle her.

She's got to pick up this one. You okay?

It's the bunion.

Which one?

Girl, I can't believe I'm about to give all this money back.

You're a hero, Mr. Brand. I ain't no hero.

You are. And you're agreeing to give the reward money to Benny's mom? It makes

you an even bigger hero.

I'm very proud of you. Carmen, what if I just gave him half of it back? Would I

still be a hero to you?

Come on, Mr. Brown.

Carmen.

Goodbye, new money. Feel it, Carmen.

Crispy, that's new money.

Goodbye, new wingtip shoes.

Goodbye, new polyester pants.

There's no such thing as new polyester pants.

Carmen, I'm trying to have a moment. Would you let me have this moment?

Goodbye, new plastic couch covers for the old couch.

Goodbye.

Hey, bro.

Come here, boy.

Oh, hi, Benny.

Hey, Benny. Hey, Benny.

I thought about what I said, and you want to give me the money? I don't want

give you Jack, Nathan, Bo, Ditley, nothing.

But I'm going to help your mama.

So here, take it.

Thank you so much.

I'm just trying to take it. Let me hold on. Loose my finger. Loose my finger.

Give him the money.

Just hold it.

Thank you.

Thank you so much. Oh, this is the type of thing that can change a man's life

around. My mother and I are ever so grateful. Thank you so much. I just want

I just want y 'all to be happy.

I'm going to run and tell mama the good news. The good news.

Just let me, just let me.

I think I did the right thing. You did, Mr. Brown. Well, why it hurt so bad?

Why it hurt so bad?

Why?

Mr. Brown. Mr. Brown. Hey, Miss Cora. Hey.

Now, look. Does Mr. Smith look familiar to you?

Look at him do it.

Turn him back to the other side.

Turn him back to the other side. I can't see. You can't. I can't. You can't

just. Never heard of him. I don't know him.

Come on. Mr. Smith was at the bus. out with you that day. He actually pushed

Barrington into you and saved your life.

What the what?

Why did you say that thing sooner?

Well, he was unconscious when he came in, and then he had to have surgery and

had his jaw wired shut. He said, I saved you and Mr.

Barrington.

Barrington, yes.

I, Benny the Bomb, saved me. No, no, no, no, no. Mr. Smith said Benny was there,

but he didn't say nobody.

What?

And I just saw Benny the beggar. He was going outside.

He had a sign that said, I ain't going to lie.

I want a beer. You know what?

You did the right thing. Maybe his mom did need the money.

His mama?

Yeah. Why his mama need that much on her books?

You know she's doing 10 to 20 for fraud.

Benny got you.

You know what?

For this time, I'm going out like a gangster.

Wait a minute.

What would Jesus do, Corby? Let's ask, what would Jesus do? Lord, what would

do?

Get him! Get him!

Wait a minute! Wait a minute, Corby! How you just gonna run over Mr.

Smith like that? He busy or not?

All right.

Okay.

Oh.

Hello, Brianna, Jamal.

I can't take it anymore.

We took Joaquin to the party, we brought home the wrong kid, and we went back.

Joaquin was gone.

I'm sorry. I don't quite understand hysterical teenage talk.

What is your friend saying?

Joaquin is lost!

We have to go find him.

You mean he's missing? Yes.

That's unfortunate.

If I may say something. No.

Excuse me, Jamal.

Would you like a beverage?

A beverage?

Are you crazy?

Didn't you hear what we just said?

Joaquin is missing.

I took him to the party. Oh, oh, oh, oh. You mean the party we told you you

couldn't go to?

Huh?

Yes.

But I took him with me.

And then this other kid had the same costume on as him. And then we

brought him home by mistake.

Well, then I guess you're an only child.

Isn't that great? I mean, one child is cheaper than two. Yes, it is. You know

what? One less man in the house, one less chance for me to fall in the

Same thing with my papa on this.

Oh, man, and the way you and Joaquin used to fight. Oh, you're glad he's

I'm sure.

Yep. Oh, so I'm in a lot of trouble then, huh?

Yep.

And you, Jamal.

We can see you.

Ooh,

hot chocolate and marshmallow.

Cora, that drink is for suckers.

Mr. Brown, this drink is for a hero.

No, it ain't, Cora. I ain't no hero.

Yes, you are.

No, Cora.

Cory, I want to be a real hero.

I want to save somebody for real, like in real life. Like a, like a zelle in

distress. I want to save somebody. You mean a damsel in distress.

Oh, Cory, yes, but I don't cuss like you.

Cory!