Original subtitles

Joaquin, Brianna, grilled cheese, just like you like it.

Burnt?

I prefer the term smoked.

If Sasha was here, she wouldn't make him eat this.

This is child abuse.

Hey, there are starving children in this world who'd love to eat this food.

And because of you, there are starving children in this house.

Hey, I'm a great cook.

You ruined breakfast yesterday.

Honest mistake.

Will?

It was cereal.

You guys don't want to eat my food if you don't appreciate the hard work that

I'm doing to try to put something in your... I

can't believe you drug me out of church before it was even over. I can't believe

the way the pastor went on and on and on and on like that. It was not that long.

What you mean it wasn't that long? Where?

That was a brother came and joined the church. He had time to go down the

street, rob the bank, and still had time to come back and repent.

That is not true.

And who questions the way somebody tithes? I give my tent. They better be

people still tithe in any way with this bad economy.

You gave it in quarters, Mr. Brown. You're going to give the poor usher a

hernia. Well, Jesus healed.

Yes, he does.

It's time for change around this church.

People have been talking about our congregation.

congregation? Mainly me, but word travels fast.

You know what, Uncle Brown? The church board's having elections next week. You

should run.

Really? You know what, nephew? That sounds like a wonderful idea.

That's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna run for church board.

Things gonna change around here. Mr. Brown can't run water.

I actually think he'd do great.

And you can't boil water.

What we need is we need change.

Change we all can believe in.

And you gonna make that change, Mr. Brand? I sure am. Yes, I surely re -am.

gonna change it.

Thank you.

Tastes like you put your foot in these grits.

Really? So you like them?

No, it really tastes like you put your feet in it. Like you mash this cake and

callous this feet with burger powder.

Hey, Will.

Brianna, Joaquin, Sasha's here to pick you up. Let's go.

Next time, ring the doorbell, please.

We're going to a movie.

And then to grab a bite.

They ain't watching.

Oh, no.

Oh, God, those poor kids must be starving.

Yeah. You know, babe, I was just trying to ease the tension.

A whack joke about my bad cooking isn't going to ease anything.

Well, you're going to have to talk to me eventually.

There's nothing to talk about.

Rihanna! Joaquin!

Sasha's here! Let's go!

Sasha!

Hey!

How you guys doing?

Oh, you look so good.

I missed you, Sasha.

Oh, I missed you too, Joaquin. We just saw her yesterday.

Well, we are going to have a great time today.

At least we get to hang out here.

Yeah, Sasha.

Let's hang out here. No, Sasha's got plans for you guys today.

Um, okay, guys. Would you excuse us for a minute, please?

No, no, no, guys.

Don't go anywhere.

But I need to talk to you.

There's nothing to talk about.

Your turn.

Rihanna, this isn't a game.

You could have fooled me.

I'll see you guys at seven.

Um, I'm gonna go upstairs and grab a few things.

Are Will and Sasha breaking up?

I don't know, Joaquin.

I thought they left each other.

Well, sometimes adults just forget.

Maybe we can remind them. How?

Gosh, do I have to think of everything around here?

All we have to

do...

What are

you doing now?

Cora, I'm making some signs for my campaign.

Okay, Cora, I want you to check this one out. Look at here. What? Let me see.

Vote for Brown.

and your tithe will go down. You can't steal from Jesus.

I'm not stealing from him.

I'm going to give it back when I get to heaven.

Oh, look at this one. Look at this one.

Brown puts the union in communion.

That's catchy, ain't it? You like that one. That sounds pretty good.

I've got to work on my slogans for my campaign.

What campaign? What you talking about? Oh, some of the church members put my

name on the ballot. They want me to run.

Was they sad when you told them no?

I didn't.

What? Carver, wait. We better call them. You can't just leave people alone.

That's not Christ -like. What are you talking about?

Congratulations, Laura. Thank you. Speaking of not Christ -like, I heard

your church hat in the race.

Yes, I did. Thank you.

Also, you really gonna run against me? You serious?

You serious?

What is so funny?

Carver, you're right. It's not funny. It's ridiculous.

It's insensitive. It's the craziest thing I ever heard.

As not, Cora would make a good board member.

Thank you. As a matter of fact, we're going to vote for him, right, Colonel?

Well, um, I would... Right, Colonel?

Oh, and I could use a cut in my ties. I mean, um, you're a little high

maintenance.

Colonel, I've been a member of this church for years, and the congregation

respects me.

Well, you got a point there, Cora.

Oh, that ain't nothing. I've been a member of this church for years, too,

the congregation... Who cares what everybody...

I'm going to win anyway.

ER.

No, you cannot just walk in and get a flu shot. You need an appointment.

No, this is not the free clinic. I don't care who you are.

Stop calling here, Mama.

Renee, that was rude. I know.

I don't know why she don't get a fake insurance card like everybody else.

Mr. Simons needs his catheter removed in 301, and Ms.

Livingston had another accident in her bed again in 306.

Can you take care of that for me? Thank you.

No, no, no, Renee.

Not you.

I'm talking to Nurse Brown.

Excuse me?

What? You can do it.

I've got some other things I need Renee to handle.

Now, when you do it, make sure you breathe through your mouth, because

I get caught in my throat.

With all due respect, Will.

That's Dr.

Brown.

Okay, fine, Dr.

Brown.

I'm the charge nurse on this floor. That means that all physician's orders are

assigned by me. And I'm the senior resident on this floor, and no nurse

question my orders.

Renee, what are you doing?

I'm getting some footage for my new reality show, When Residents Attack.

And can you guys speak up? Because the audio on this thing is messed up. I was

using it the other night with me and my boyfriend.

As you can see, the female of the species is the aggressor.

I didn't do it. I didn't say it. And I'm telling you, for the last time, it

wasn't me.

Next question.

I have a question, Brown. Yes, yes, yes.

Now, as a board church member, I mean, um, church board member, I'd like to

know how you plan to eliminate the excessive spending.

Good question.

That's a good question.

That ain't the question I told you to ask me. Well, can you answer it? Well, I

can answer that question.

We can save more money by running our air conditioning 20 % less and offering

more hand -

All right, that's a good answer, Cora.

You stole my answer, which is exactly why you shouldn't vote for my opponent.

Because if she'll steal, she'll lie. You probably lied right now. Everything's

coming out your mouth.

The house recognizes the troll from under the bridge.

Troll along, trolly.

What else do you bring to the table other than your stomach?

y 'all help me with this.

I possess style and charisma. Look at all of that.

Well,

I can be funny, too.

But church business is serious business.

Our church needs new updated hymnals. We need new choir rolls.

And we need new cushions for our pews. Oh, yeah. Can I get an amen?

Amen. Yeah, because the ones we're sitting on right now, I can't get no

on.

Pat is proud.

Okay.

Cora, a blessed sister here who deserves to win better than that old

psychedelic heathen standing next to you are going to win hand down because

you're blessed. Dude! Excuse me, dude, sir, ma 'am, mister.

Do you have a question?

No, I don't have a question.

Well, park your truck over there, please.

Yes, sir. Now, I do have a question.

Recognizing Colonel, speak your mind. Let the Lord use you as he walked with

in perfect peace.

Well, the question I have, Brown, is who is catering this blasted thing because

my stomach is touching my back.

Well, I plan to feed the multitude.

Yes, right after you all vote for me.

temple. And in closing, I'd just like to say how much I love this church.

Take your time. Take your time. How much it means to me to be able to serve you,

okay?

Oh, brother, serve you.

Oh, mother, please let me serve you.

something to do probably look how long are you gonna keep this thing up with

sasha listen renee my uh my personal business isn't up for discussion oh um i

wouldn't call it personal because everybody in hospital nobody everybody

everybody knows what that you caught sasha sleeping with troy

oh yeah i heard he had her on every wall in 306

So why are you acting like that?

I'm not acting like anything.

Renee, it's complicated.

I mean, when you're married, you have a baby.

Why am I talking to you?

Because you need to talk to somebody because you're not talking to your wife.

Renee, this is between me and Sasha.

No, it also affects Brandy and Little Yoakum.

That's Brianna and Joaquin.

Why did y 'all name those kids that?

Oh, wait. I forgot.

Y 'all got those kids on layaway.

Okay, look.

Not that I need to explain anything to you, but you know as well as I do and

everybody else that you told that Sasha was wrong.

Okay, look. I'm not saying that she wasn't. But haven't you ever made a

Now, come on. Real talk.

Now, maybe what Sasha did was just a reaction from your action.

I didn't do anything.

Yeah, and if you keep doing nothing, you're going to lose your family.

Everything looked good, Brianna, except there's one little problem. There's a

fork missing. There is? Yeah, I think I dropped it over there, like way, way,

yeah. Yeah, let's see.

Oh, there it is.

Oh, okay.

Now it's perfect.

Yeah.

Will's home.

Okay. Just act normal. Okay.

Cool.

Hey. Hey, kids.

Hey. Welcome home, father.

Father. Really? Too much?

It smells good in here. What'd you do?

Nothing. We're just so happy to see you.

Okay. It must be bad.

What'd you do?

Sit down.

Allow me to pour you something to drink, sir.

Sir? Really?

I smell lasagna.

Yeah, your favorite, and it's not smoked either.

So since when do you two know how to cook lasagna?

Ta -da!

Dinner is served.

I get it.

What are you doing here?

Sasha came by to make your favorite dinner.

Isn't that nice of her?

Uh -huh.

Yeah, the kids told me you said it would be okay.

Hmm.

Care to explain?

Nope.

Let's eat before the food gets cold.

I didn't know.

All right, what do you want me to do?

Bless the food, Joaquin.

Dear Lord, bless this food and this family.

Thank you for letting Sasha come over so we can finally have a decent meal.

No offense, but... And thank you for bringing us all together

under one roof, just like a normal family should be.

Forever and ever and ever and ever.

And ever I'm in.

Oh, man, I'm full.

Me too.

I have calculus.

Yeah, and I'm going to help her, you know, because she's not that bright.

Some people need help with that.

Wow. Looks to me like we've been set up.

You don't have to stay.

Well, I'm fine if you are.

I'm good.

Is the food okay?

It's all right.

I used a little mozzarella instead of the parmesan.

If I remember right, the last time I made this...

We were the ones who left the dinner table early.

Look, the kids are gone. We don't have to do this.

We'll do what?

I'm just trying to make a little conversation.

And it's not necessary.

Why don't we just... just eat and go on our way?

All right, never mind.

You know, this is not working.

I'm going to tell the kids goodbye.

And if you want to talk, you know where to find me.

Carver, here you go.

Here, take this.

What? What is this for? Carver, that's some comfort food.

To comfort you when you find out you done lost this race.

You know, I just want you to remember, Cora, everybody is a winner.

Except you.

Huh? What if you lose?

Obviously, you ain't listening to nothing I just said, did you?

How much did I win by? Tell me. What happened?

I have bad news, Cora.

I won!

I won!

I shot that BB gun! Oh, Brown, you didn't win.

Wait a minute. It sounds like you just said I didn't win.

You didn't? You lost. You lost. You ate the apples.

Unfortunately,

you didn't win either, Cora.

Wait a minute. I don't understand.

What? It was a tie.

A tie?

Yeah. Four and a half of them didn't want you on the board.

And around the other half didn't want you in church.

Wait a minute. Who got the position?

Well, they say because you two acted so poorly, they decided to eliminate the

position altogether.

Wait, wait, now does this mean I can't run next year?

Oh, I sure wish you'd run out in traffic with some scissors.

Well, can I use the ones you broke trimming up your nose hair?

You're looking at my paper. That's all I'm looking at is my paper.

Why did she go back?

I don't know.

Uh, Carver Greens is on sale. They got these greens on sale.

I'm going to go get some.

I don't like not talking. You know what?

I'm sorry.

I let my competitive spirit get the best of me. I'm sorry.

Well, I guess I let my dear spirit get the best of me.

And I know I'm no better. Yeah.

Let's make a promise. We'll never compete against each other again.

Okay. Okay, pinky promise.

What? Pinky?

That's right. We ain't gonna do that no more.

Hey, Miss Edna. Hey.

Did you all hear the news?

What news? They found out what species of animal you from. Tell us what you,

pterodactyl. Shut up, Missing Link.

You will never stop playing.

I ain't no brush, Mr. Brush. You try to tell them. Old man Thomas passed.

Oh, what a shame. Oh, it's terrible.

One of the first.