Original subtitles

Because this food is great. Oh, thank you, Will. Yeah, any breakfast that's

ought to be great.

Uncle Brown, why do you keep trying to imply that I don't contribute around

here? Oh, you're right. I shouldn't have complied that.

You do comply. Yes. You contribute to running up my water bill, burning up all

my lights, and breathing up all my good air.

Oh, hush up, Mr. Brown.

Will, you know he's upset Vera's staying with us for a few days.

I don't mind her staying here, but do she have to stay inside?

Uncle Brown, she's got to recover from her eye surgery.

Why's she got to have eye surgery anyway? Because I thought vultures had

vision.

What are you talking about? Well, she was my sister before she was your mama.

She's still my sister. She's a vulture, a bat, a guano, an iguana, everything.

She's just an animal. Well, we all have to work, so you and Vera need to try and

get along.

All right, now we're... But just in case we don't, I got Adam a control on speed

dial. That's what I got.

Where's Sasha?

Having one of those I hate all my clothes moments.

Shut up. I have them, too.

Me, too.

Barbara, you hate your clothes?

No, I hate your clothes.

That's a good one, good one. That's a good one.

What the... Good morning, Sasha. Hey, girl.

Baby, you want something to eat? Want some breakfast? No, no, no, no. I think

I'll just have some coffee.

That's good for us. Because, girl, if you eat so much as a grit, the button on

them jeans is going to put somebody's eye out. You just... Mr.

Brown, stop it.

Brown, please. My jeans aren't tight.

Girl, them jeans so tight, you're going to get affection.

Are they, Will?

Don't you answer that. Look over this way. Eat your food.

Eat something, nephew.

Eat that whole thing. Just eat it down.

Will.

Will. I'm sorry, baby. Did you say something?

Do you think these jeans make me look fat?

Oh, Lord, here we go.

No, I think it's sexy when you take a short, shallow breath like that.

Clara, are you okay? I don't know what happened.

I mean, I just bought them like three weeks ago.

Well, lay tight this week.

Oh, no.

I got it. No, no, no, baby. I got it. I got it.

I got $5. She gonna die before she get back up.

She gonna break her torso.

Just reach. Reach down for it.

out yesterday right i'm trying to watch tv you know what yesterday two weeks ago

it's kind of the same thing hey simone it's been two weeks get

over it he's just not that into you what do you think you're doing i told you i

was watching tv

Hey,

what are you guys doing?

Now

I just

had a great run and I am feeling good. You two need to take that mess upstairs.

Can you say dead man walking?

Can you say you're kitty kitty?

My money's on Joaquin.

or two.

She got a mouth like an alligator.

Yes, yes, cusses too.

How much you wait? How much you wait, Vera? Give me that phone, you natural

disaster. He's a fool.

Vera, where you been? You late.

Oh, Lord. I was tied up with my friend Harold.

Well, actually, I tied him up.

You know, Harold's got a little freak in him.

Stop being nasty.

Vera, how you gonna get caught up with some man and you got surgery today?

Oh, I ain't got to be there till two.

But first, Brown, go get me a glass of wine, will you? You know I don't keep no

alcohol in this house.

Yeah.

Yeah, I know.

You know I ain't no drinking in my house. You smell like you've been

already. You know what? I bet you if I cut you, you'll probably bleed shopper

naked. That's Merlot, you fool.

Anyway, it's just eye surgery.

I'll be out and about in a day.

I don't care if you're about.

I just want you to out. That's what I want you out.

Brown.

I am your son.

Vera, Vera, that is not my fault.

Listen, can't you be decent to me for 24 hours?

Vera, you know what? Yes.

If you sleep 23 of them and die the other hour. You know what? I'm getting

Vera.

And I got 30 more minutes to go, baby.

Sweetheart, you need to slow down.

I mean, what are you training for?

A pair of size 4 jeans.

Oh, it's going to be a battle.

Come on, baby. You need to be saving that energy for later on.

You know what I'm saying?

Baby.

Back there's this kickboxing class I'm going to later.

What?

You kidding me?

Will, would you please stop talking to me now unless you're going to join in?

Babe, I'm worried about you, okay? So what? Like, one pair of jeans don't fit.

No, no, no, no, no.

Not just one pair of jeans will.

None of my jeans are fitting, and I refuse to give up now.

Okay, but I love you just the way you are, okay? It doesn't matter how big you

are.

Really?

So somebody up in his beak?

How big you might get.

Boy, I'm gonna whack you up. You know what?

I think the kids need me. Huh?

Oh, okay.

Size 14.

Size 14.

Joaquin, touch my plate again and I swear you're gonna pull back up.

What are you two doing?

Joaquin keeps taking food off my plate.

I wanted some. You snooze, you lose.

That's disgusting!

Joaquin, that wasn't very nice.

You're right, Will.

I'm sorry, Brianna.

Now, look, finish up so you guys can get going.

Simone's mom will be here any minute.

Okay.

Brianna, no!

What now?

She just balled up my sandwich.

You two. All right.

Joaquin?

Stop licking your sister's food. And Brianna, stop balling up your brother's

food.

Look at my children.

All right.

Simone's mom's here.

So let's review.

Brianna, you're going to go straight to the movies, come straight home. Okay?

Okay. Great.

Joaquin, no jumping around from movie to movie.

Only when me and you hang out.

All right. Stay with your sister.

Only boy who will.

Let's do mute.

Come on.

Hey, babe.

Sasha.

Sasha, can you hear me?

Baby.

Hello.

Hello, yeah. Can I get an ambulance right away?

Sweetheart. Hello. Baby. Baby.

Good afternoon, folks.

How's it going?

Good.

I'm Dr. Jovi, and I'm here to save your life.

All right. I'm Dr.

Brown, and I actually... Killed a man.

I'm kidding.

I know who you are. We started a residency here together.

Oh, okay.

Nice to meet you.

And this beautiful lady is actually my wife. I know who she is.

I played golf with Troy.

He told me all about you.

Again, I am kidding.

We know you never let him on at all.

Chuck.

Can you just tell me what's going on with my wife?

Well, one of her feet is bigger than the other.

Her head is a little bit small for her body.

And her hips, my God, those hips.

Sweet.

Dr. Jaffe, stop playing.

A little tack.

There you go.

A little tack.

I'm killing.

Oh, wait.

That's you.

Seriously, folks, I'm here all night. Try the halibut.

Do you know why?

For the halibut?

No, it's actually really good here.

Well, could you please give me another doctor or better comedian?

Okay, okay. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

I love my job so much, I go overboard sometimes.

But this is a happy moment.

Why is this a happy moment? My wife fainted earlier today. Doctor, could you

please just tell me what's wrong with you? Nothing is wrong.

You're in great shape.

For a pregnant woman.

Should I call Troy?

I'm joking.

see in your office.

No, I didn't read the fine print. That's why I need surgery, fool.

Uh -oh.

Who is that, dear?

Brown, is that really you, Brown?

No, it's not Brown.

This is your sobriety. Do you miss me?

Very funny.

I am your sobriety. Where is my food, Brown? It's right here. I got it right

here. You got an eye of newt, one horseshoe, and a bag... wing. There you

don't want your wings or your shoes, your old gold. What is it really, Brown?

It's some soup Cara made.

Bone apple feet.

Uh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Ain't you gonna feed it to me, Brown?

I done already fed you to the rats and they threw you back. What?

Brown, you promised to take care of me. You promised.

Vera, you're wearing my nerd. What else can I get you before I neglect you?

Glass of Jack, pay -per -view and surprise.

Look here, you nasty, blind, old, lonely woman.

This ain't no motel, and I'm sure not leaving the lights on for you. Brown,

Brown, you can't upset me.

The doctor said tears could ruin my procedure.

Well, he should have told you that vodka is not a food group, too.

Brown, Brown, can you get me a blankie blankie for my legs?

You were my last nerve that I got reserved for Aetna.

Can you drape it over me, Brown? Just drape it on me. I'm chilly all up here.

All over my butt. You trying my feet?

Here you go.

We don't want to hurt the baby, the baby.

Well, I think we need to talk.

Is something wrong?

No, no, no, no. Everything's fine.

Good.

All right.

What you want to talk about?

I can't wait to tell everybody we're going to have a baby.

That's what we need to talk about.

Well, look, I think we need to keep this news to ourselves.

You serious?

Yeah, at least through the first trimester.

Look, we both know that anything can happen.

So, I mean, but we can't even tell the family.

Yeah,

well, if we do that, we might as well post it on the internet.

Hey, I didn't know you two were out here.

Where you been?

Watching a movie.

Oh, it was a movie about a hospital.

Oh, so what was it about?

Um, the hospital movie.

Well, it must have been some movie because somebody's glowing.

Oh,

speaking of glowing, your mama's in there lit up like a Christmas tree. She

can't see a thing and she's driving Mr. Brown crazy.

Thanks for the warning. Sure. Is that the trash? I'll take it. Oh, well, thank

you, sweetie.

Thank you so much.

Girl, you're just glowing.

Glistening, glistening.

We'll be in shortly.

So, you really want to keep this a secret, huh?

Baby, I know it's going to be hard, but I think it's best.

Okay.

Okay.

All right.

If that's what you want, then I'm with you.

Well, I'm excited.

Okay, I'm just... I'm just scared.

Nothing to be scared about, baby.

I'll be right here with you all the way.

I love you. I love you, too.

Come on. This is the backyard.

This isn't the bathroom.

Oh, well, I was going to the bathroom.

I guess I zigged when I should have zagged.

Speaking of zigzag. Mom, please.

Come on.

Let's get you back inside.

How far along are you?

Excuse me?

No, excuse you.

I saw that.

Ma, you can see.

Of course I can see.

I'm drunk. I'm not blind.

Vera, I thought you had eye surgery yesterday.

I rescheduled it.

So you've been letting Uncle Brown just wait on you hand and foot.

I most certainly have.

I've been faking it. And don't you tell him.

Vera, Will and I would like to keep this a secret.

At least through my first trimester. Oh, honey, I'm all down with that. Come

here. Come here.

Congratulations. Oh, look at that baby. Hold on a minute. Hold on a second.

It is yours, ain't it?

Of course.

Ah, well, then, congratulations.

Go be a grandma.

Go be a grandma.

Go be... Oh, goodness.

Oh, no, honey. That jumping around and Jack don't go together.

Vera, do you promise you're not going to tell anyone?

Didn't I tell you I could keep a secret?

Will don't even know his daddy ain't his daddy.

What? Shh, that's a secret.

Can I get you anything else?

shouldn't be drinking so soon after your surgery. Oh, Cora, this is preventative

medicine. It prevents me from giving a damn. Will you stop cussing in this

house? Are you feeling okay?

Oh, Cora.

Cora, I'm in bad shape.

Bad shape. I may have to stay at least three more days.

The devil is alive.

If you stay one more day, somebody getting choked out, Cora, and it ain't

somebody to run the tub.

She can run you down to the river and beat you up against a rock.

And I think I told you no drinking in my house.

Bro, bro, no take that. I need that for my recovery.

Recovery from what?

I talked to the doctor. He said you don't need no surgery.

What you need is AA, Animal Anonymous.

No, you just lying. You just lying.

Your appointment was rescheduled till Friday.

What? So you ain't gonna need this for no recovery. You've been lying all this

time. I heard nothing. Brown!

Brown, that's my vodka!

Get out of the way, you old goat!

My vodka!

Brown! Can you see me now?

Brown!

That's what I'm trying to say. This don't make no... You mean to tell me

can't tell these babies time? No, they only talk to each other.

That's the point.

I like it. I think it's cute.

I still don't get it. Me neither. I don't get this.

That's shocking.

What do you think, babe?

She likes it. She thinks it's cute.

One of you, you got to get up.