Original subtitles

Careful, baby. They're hot.

Come on. And you are too, lady.

I think both these cookies and you need to cool off.

Come on, baby. We have company.

I know.

I really appreciate you doing this for Anthony, babe.

I'm doing this for you and Joaquin. Come on, babe.

Got some flack.

He's been hurting since he and Renee broke up. I don't think he's even spoken

a woman for the last few months. Hey, Fallon.

How's my sexy girl?

You're six months pregnant?

But I haven't seen you in like five, six, seven months.

Yes!

Oh, no, no. Oh, no.

No, I can't go out tonight.

I'm babysitting.

What?

Yeah, that's him. Yeah, that's my little nephew. Hi.

No, no.

I'm busy, too.

Okay.

Woo!

Dodge that bullet.

Uncle Anthony, what does dodge that bullet mean?

It's an expression that I learned from a contortionist that I met at a bunny

ranch.

Oh, you like bunnies?

I don't. You will.

Oh, come on, cut him some slack.

He was home by himself. And besides, Joaquin could use another positive role

model. Wow.

that's where the term what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas comes from.

You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying?

You know what I'm saying?

Oh, Sasha, Uncle Anthony was telling me about his lady friend who works with

bunnies at a ranch.

Oh,

you mean drop it like it's hot? Like that girl that works at the Bunny Ranch?

You know what? Have a cookie.

He gets his Bible studies mixed up.

Wow.

Looking forward to that movie, huh?

Thanks, baby.

Yeah.

The Incredibles. Oh, I heard about this one. Yes.

Oh, wait.

This is a cartoon.

stay and watch a movie with Joaquin, and you can take Anthony out.

Sure? Yes.

Of course. Yes. That's what I'm talking about, because I know I'm not wanted.

Hey, play a little pool, have a few beers.

One beer.

Okay, one beer.

So wet. One beer.

Thanks, baby. All right.

All right. Hey, later, Joaquin.

All right.

All right, little dude.

Oh, hey.

What's up? Maybe you can bring a bunny back. A bunny?

What happens in the living room stays in the living room. Man rules.

Sasha, do you like bunnies?

Act like you're having fun, Will.

I'm ready to go. Let's battle. Come on. We can go, man. We can go. Let's enjoy

it. We can go sit down, man. Something's going to happen.

Man,

I think I just found the next woman who's going to bust the windows out of

car. It's two of them.

So what?

I need a wingman, Will. No, you don't.

Will, not me. No. You know I'm married. So?

They don't know that. All you got to do is sit there, keep the other one

company. While I work my magic.

I'm not going to do this again.

Will, do I have to say it? No, I done done this a hundred times. Do I have to

say it? No, I'm not doing this. Sheila!

Harry! Don't say that! Don't say that! I'm not listening. Yeah, try spooning

that grizzly bear. Huh? Huh? Huh?

You owe me, dog.

Imagine that in the morning. All right, all right, all right, all right, all

right! All right, then.

Wow.

Which one? Which one you want to holler at?

Which one you think got daddy issues?

The one with the shortest skirt?

Bingo.

Thank you for saving my seat for me.

Do I know you?

You don't, but if you play your cards right, you will.

Sit down.

Carry back. I'm good right here.

I'm Raquel.

And this is Lydia.

Hi.

I'm trying to cheer her up. It's the 20th anniversary of the day her dad ran

off.

I'm sorry. You'll have to excuse my friend.

Yeah, you should excuse us. Would you like to dance?

I meant with me.

Oh, oh.

Huh? Huh?

That can only end badly.

I will.

So, will you buy me a drink?

That sounded better in my head.

What would you like?

Sex on the beach.

Damn things have changed.

Oh, you mean the drink.

Right.

I see you're kind of new at this.

New? No.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no. No, I'm not doing anything.

No, really.

I'm just helping out my boy.

He doesn't look like he needs any help.

It will.

Five, four, three, two... Okay, okay, okay.

Will, I need help. I need one of them little yellow dogs.

I got two books. How many

books you got, Mr. Brant? All right, I'm thinking, I'm thinking.

Since my heart attack, I haven't been able to go to the clubs the

way I used to.

Yep. Colonel, yeah, that's right. You need to take care of your heart.

Mr. Brands. Huh? They cheating.

What? You can't pop the board like that. You can't tap over the table like that.

We are not.

Yes, you are.

Honey, I love that.

talk about it. Oh, okay. Go ahead. Your turn, Brian.

Fine, I'll tell you.

I have like a zero chance of making the cheerleading squad.

Well, Brianna, if you had more...

I went to the cheerleading tryouts for my school.

Oh. All the girls laughed at me.

What did you do?

I stunk.

I embarrassed myself.

Okay, I'll tell you what. Let's see what you got. Yes, yes, let's see. Now show

us what you got. Come on. Show us what you got. Come on.

Now jump high, man. Come on, man.

Show us what you got.

Oh.

Yeah. When?

Oh. Yeah.

When you gonna do it?

Girl, you suck.

Are you sure you were raised in the hood?

Too hot.

Carmen, that's good and terrible. That's what it is. I'm sorry. Come on, Brie.

It's okay, Brie. It's all right. It's okay.

You can't be doing that. Well, I'm trying to discourage her.

All my life, I wanted to be in front of a cheerleading squad. Well, with a

performance like that, you need to be in front of a firing squad.

Carmen, I'm going to tell you everything I know.

That's going to be about two seconds.

I guess you think you can do better.

I have you know, I was the best cheerleader back in the day.

Well, who was your cheerleading for? The fighting pterodactyls?

Give me a... We all need help.

Well, if she thinks she can cheer better than me, she got another thing coming.

Oh, bring it on, fat boy.

You know what makes this perfect?

You and a negligee?

No.

I was about to say popcorn.

Oh. Well, that's good, too.

Just watch that hot butter, baby.

I will be right back, Billy.

Oh!

Don't let her in the house.

Don't let her in there, man.

I'm telling you, she crazy!

Oh, no.

Look.

What are you doing here?

I came by to talk to you.

Talk to... How'd you know where I live?

I'm a parole officer.

I have connections.

Okay, then.

Do you know I live here with my wife?

No.

Okay. So, you gotta get out of here.

Will?

Uh, yeah.

Popcorn's ready.

What were you doing outside?

Uh, looking for the paper.

We don't get the paper.

That's why it wasn't out there.

What was that?

Oh, isn't it good?

Mm -hmm. You know what this needs?

More butter.

But you haven't even tasted it.

Mm.

Now it needs more butter.

You are mad.

Okay. My baby wants more butter. I'll get him more butter. Mm -hmm.

Okay, quick. You gotta go.

No. I came by to talk to you.

Um, no talking.

Please, just go.

You and Anthony meet us at the club tomorrow.

No.

Fine. Then we'll talk now.

Okay, okay.

We'll meet you at the club.

Cool.

We've got company.

Uh, look.

Sasha, I can explain.

Why did you call me Sasha?

Because you're supposed to be in a bed.

What do you want?

Oh, I heard you talking, and I can't get the top off the toothpaste.

But you got to understand about cheerleading that you got to show a

spirit.

And a little knee.

I'm just saying. Yeah, yeah, the spirit's moving me.

Why don't y 'all demonstrate a cheer?

Yeah, yeah, yes, and whoever's the best can help Brianna. Yeah, yeah, yeah, do a

cartwheel, baby.

Do a cartwheel? Yeah, do a cartwheel. The last cartwheel she seen was when she

was tied to that carpet wagon.

Move out the way, Francis the talking mule.

Oh,

yeah, oh, yeah.

Shake it to the... Yeah!

Shake it to the...

What does the P .U. stand for?

Put you under?

Back up, Ryder. Check it. Let me show you how this is done.

broken and you can't get up?

Okay, so you really need to stop it. I know you're trying to help, but you're

making it worse, Mr. Brown. That's Edna. That ain't me.

Aw, that's Brown.

Now get up. Hey, listen, can you two get along long enough to help her get to

the tryouts?

You know what? You two have really helped enough. I know what I have to do.

What you guys have done.

So you're saying she came to your crib?

Yeah, man.

You know what that means?

Yes. She crazy.

No, no, no, no, no. That means the crazier the lady, the better the gravy.

You know what I'm saying?

No. What's wrong with you, man? Man, what's wrong with you?

Look, I told you, I'm not interested, all right?

I'm happily married, okay? I'm in love with my wife.

Sasha! Yes. Come on, man. I know her name, fool.

No.

Sasha, it's 12 o 'clock.

Oh, my goodness.

It's two years?

You know, you gotta handle, be a man. You know what? Sometimes you gotta

your own business. What are you doing?

Hey, playa!

Sasha, you look so nice. Doesn't she look great?

So, sweetheart, what are you doing here?

told me this silly story about a woman who came to our house looking for you.

Looking for you. That's crazy.

That would be crazy. I know, right? Can you believe that? No.

So I came to check it out.

Well, I'm not comfortable coming in between a husband and his wife.

Except for the one time. Shut up, Anthony.

So who's this woman with?

What woman?

Hola, Will.

Damn!

That's Aunt Mama's feet.

Hi,

I'm Sasha, Will's wife.

And you are?

I'm Raquel.

You have a beautiful home.

Came to see my husband.

Came to my house and came to see my husband.

Okay,

you know what? Sasha! Sasha!

Girl, I love you. Don't do it. Don't hurt her. She's Popo, okay?

Get out of my face, Anthony.

I came by your house to ask Will for Anthony's number. Look, listen, okay?

not leaving my wife, okay? She is the most beautiful thing in the whole wide

world, okay? And just because we had sex on the beach, the drink, The drink, not

the nasty, okay?

Uh, wait a minute.

You said Anthony.

I sure did.

It's crazy that you were chasing after me just to get to Anthony.

Right, homie? I wasn't after you, Will.

That is right.

No offense, big homie. You can't get it if you ain't got it.

Oh, no, he got it all right, but it belongs to me.

Yeah, that's right.

You got that?

Got it.

You want to, uh, let's go over here and talk. Let me holler at you.

What's up?

Looks like you came all the way down here to make sure nobody was trying to

up to your man.

Ain't nobody worried about you.

Came to get my lemon pepper ramp.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Um, you went through all that to get my number, huh?

No.

Actually,

I really was interested in Will.

Guess he is happily married.

It's so true what they say. All the good ones are married.

I'm not married.

Exactly.

So you went through all that to get my number back.

Did you show them the moves I showed you?

Yeah. Wait, wait, wait. Did you show them the big finish?

Superstar. Uh -huh. Okay, okay, what happened? What happened?

Oh, you mean after they asked me to leave?

They asked you to leave.

Yeah, and they told me I should get a psych evaluation.

Oh, but I made the team.

Oh, you're a cheerleader?

Wait a minute, you're a cheerleader?

Well, something like that. What does that mean?

I'll show you.

That means she's a liar.

She a lie, she a lie. I bet you wouldn't know. I'm dirty the gator.

Oh.

And they said you'd never amount to anything.

You people and your low expectations.

Don't worry about him.

Brianna, as long as you're happy, we're happy, sweetheart. Damn. They really

like my team spirit. I'm so proud of you.

Yeah.

Granted, no.