Original subtitles

Carver, I'm not the one to gossip, but I think Sister Davis want to become

Brother Davis. What are you talking about? A lot of women grow facial hairs

they get older.

My dear had facial hair when she was 15, though.

That's what it is.

That man.

Oh, Lord, speaking of facial hair.

Stop it. Hey, Miss Edna, how you doing?

I'm mad.

Oh, Barbara, she got the rabies. Come here. You know, they shot old yellow.

me get my gun. Wait. Wait. What happened?

The colonel and I had a fight.

Y 'all fighting over that raise again. I told you, get your own, because you

dull them too fast. You... No, that's safe, Jack. We're fighting over the fact

that that man has a complete lack of respect for me.

What are you talking about, Miss Edna? That man loves you enough to want to

marry you. Yeah, that's what I thought. Until the man committed the cardinal's

sin. Ed, you can't say nothing about seeing. You're not seeing so much,

going to have to look up to see him.

I'm serious.

I'm serious, too. You're going to have to look up.

What did he do?

I sent that man to the store to get some refreshment.

And he had the audacity to bring this back.

What is that?

Fiber.

Fiber?

I mean, what is he trying to say to me? Well, he's trying to say you're full

of... Mr. Grant!

It means he thinks I'm old.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. I don't see what's so funny.

Hold on. I'm going to get a mirror and show you.

Whatever.

I'm moving back in. Over my dead body.

I refuse to live with a man who thinks I'm old.

Well, you're going to die lonely.

You're going to die all by yourself.

Mr. Brown.

Look at us. She's living on by her time. She was old 20 years ago. Her time is

running out too.

Can I please have my old room back? No.

I turned it into a gym.

Right. But if you do lose your key.

Okay. You're going to be living back on the street corner, trying to get your

old job back.

You're a hustler. I'm sorry.

I couldn't help myself.

Please, I need a place to lay my head.

Okay. Cora, go turn on the oven.

Etna, Etna, I know you're in there.

Oh, isn't that romantic? He's coming to claim his woman.

Oh, quick, give her to him before the moon changes. She's turning into a wolf

something. I refuse to talk to that man.

Oh, Lord.

Come get this thing.

Oh, there you are.

Look, Edna, come on home.

Yes, Edna Shue, go on home, please. Just go back home. Stay out of this crowd.

When you stay out of my house, I stay out of your business. I'm trying to get

you to stay out. Get out.

I asked you to come home, Miss Edna. Well, he sure took his good time showing

up. Well, I would have been here sooner, but I had a couple of those fiber

tablets. That's just going to be it.

Now, come on.

Not until you apologize.

Apologize for what, Edna? For calling me old. Well, I never called you old.

You brought me those fiber things.

Well, I take fiber tablets.

Yeah, because you're old.

Well, I don't care.

Now, I'm going to ask you one more time.

Edna, come home.

I can't come home. Yes, you can. If you click your hooves together three times

and say, there's no place like home.

There's no place like home.

Not until he...

No, I'm not apologizing for something I didn't do.

Then I'm not budging.

Fine.

Fine.

Edna, he's your fiancé. You can't treat him like that.

I can, then I will. I refuse to go home with a man who does not give me my

proper respect.

Edna, you've been going home with men for a long time that didn't respect you.

You got my check?

So do.

What the devil you looking at my check for?

Just checking it out.

How's your six kids and your seven baby daddy? It's only four and four.

Well, tell all of them I said hey.

What y 'all? What y 'all?

Oh, somebody died.

Y 'all not going to tell their families.

Donate the organs to charity.

Sasha, can you prescribe me something to get rid of Edna? Because she's getting

on my nerves at the house.

That's illegal.

No, no, not nothing like that. I just want something to just shoot her and

tranquilize her. Maybe we'll use a tranquilizer dart and shoot her in the

Then I can get her in a wheelbarrow and dump her by the church.

You know, they take care of it often.

Mr. Brown, I can't help you with that. Why not?

Because Miss Edna's probably just missing the comforts of her old home.

Oh, well, that's it.

You know what?

I'm going to make her uncomfortable at my house.

I'm going to be loud, obnoxious, and rude to her and never get rid of her.

That's good, Mr. Brown. Be yourself.

Yes, yes. You're a genius. Be yourself. Girl, you're a genius. Work it out. Most

pretty girls are stupid.

But you, you, you bright, turd, something.

All right, I'll see you at church. Bible study started itself. I'll be there.

All right.

You know you lying. You ain't coming. You a filth.

Renee.

Are you going to get that?

My nails are wet.

Nurse's station.

Oh, yeah, she's here.

Renee, it's one of your sons.

Oh. Could you? Come on.

Hey. Hey, baby.

No, wait a minute. Hold up. Slow down.

I can't hardly hear you.

Because she not holding the phone correctly. You know what?

That is so unprofessional.

Hello. What you say?

No. The cable is in your name. The phone's in your brother's name.

Why?

Okay, Troy, would you stop it?

Troy. Troy.

Um, Dr. Crane.

You know, he has been playing jokes on all the nurses today.

Not me.

Shut up.

But you don't know my hands by then? Baby, of course I know your hands.

Look, I've just been a little, um, preoccupied because we've got a lot of

You know, a lot of stuff going on around here.

We ain't doing nothing.

Okay, we're gonna get you up for your break.

Yep, I'm on break.

So how did it go?

Oh, I mean, it went great. Yeah? I'm officially reinstated. You are?

Yes. Oh, my God, baby, I'm so happy for you.

Not as happy as I am.

Look, Dr. Crane came through just like he said he would.

Here comes the man.

No, you the man. No, no, no.

You the man.

Sweetheart, this man single -handedly saved our household.

Well, I wouldn't say all that. And neither would I.

Sasha, don't be like that.

But okay, look here, I'm late for surgery.

Good to have you back, Dr. Brown. Hey, it's good to be back, Dr. Crane.

What's all that about? Why are you hating on Dr. Crane? What, did you talk

him? Yeah, well, he's just trying to be nice for working my nurses so hard

lately. Well, speaking of working, you're going to be working with me

You just might be pulling a devil.

I'm not so fond of that.

She is nasty.

I have been on this phone forever.

Your recorder says that my call is important to you.

But you don't act like it.

What?

All right, I'll hold on.

And I need to use the phone.

I thought you had to use the phone.

Yeah, I wanted to use it so you can get up off of it so I can watch this game on

TV. Hey, hey, hey.

was watching that.

Well, now you're watching this.

You go home, you can watch whatever you want to watch on your TV.

Yeah, but he's older.

That ain't my business.

Run!

Catch up on my grief. I bet you if one of them pit bulls was chasing you, you'd

be running faster.

Run!

Since when did you become a football fan?

I've been watching football all my life. You know, we hit three home runs just

the other day.

And it was the first dance.

Come on. Run.

Run.

Hit the ball.

Hit it over the neck.

Yes. Get your dog off of me.

What is going on? What are

y 'all doing?

Carver, this dude tried to hit your dad. He put his nasty feet. I was

sitting here on my couch, minding my own business, getting comfortable like men

doing their own house, and this dude struck me. Come on.

Oh, just like the curve, huh? I suppose he's getting a little too comfortable,

too. That's why I'm not going anywhere, and the wedding is off.

What?

You a liar.

Mr. Brown, why are you here?

You made it worse, didn't you?

Yeah.

Okay. Yeah.

Okay. See you soon.

Bye -bye.

Oh, so you and the Colonel are making up, huh?

Um, that wasn't the Colonel. I was talking to a friend.

Oh, Miss Em, are you back to your old ways?

No. I mean, the night is young.

Oh, and I don't understand.

The Colonel came by here and asked you to come back.

Yeah, what's wrong now? He didn't ask me. He told me.

And I didn't appreciate it.

Morning, ladies. Good morning, Will.

You know, it is a great day to be going back to work.

I am glad you got your job back, Will. God is good.

All the time.

Yes, he is. Woo!

That's good.

Hey, uh, you still have the information to that florist? I want to get Sasha

some flowers.

Oh, yeah, it's on the fridge right there.

Woo, but flowers are so romantic. Don't you think so, Ms. Edna?

What's wrong with her?

Don't ask everything.

Yeah, I figured flowers were the least I can do since Sasha put up with me when

I wasn't working.

Well, what about my flowers?

You got on my nerves, too.

Now, you gonna assume Sasha wants some flowers without even asking her?

Well, if I ask her, then it wouldn't be a surprise.

Right.

Anyway, I gotta go.

See you, Cora.

And bye, Miss Cruella.

I like that.

It is not funny. He's trying to control her, too.

What? Nobody's trying to control nobody, Miss Edna.

You know what? I just figured out what this is all about.

You got coffee.

I do not. You do, too.

You know what, Miss Edna?

You've been single for so long, now you're scared to get married.

I'm scared for someone to try to control me. That's why I'm having a little

evening with a friend.

Do you hear yourself?

You have a man out there who's willing to commit the rest of his life to you.

And you want to throw it away just because he wants you to be regular?

He thinks I'm old.

You are old!

And you're acting like an old fool right now. Hey, hey, hey. Watch your mouth.

Oh, no, no way.

Now, look, I'm only telling you this because... Because I'm your friend.

Mr. Edna, God sent you a good man.

Don't let your pride get in the way.

Maybe you have a point.

Of course I do.

It wouldn't be me if I didn't have a point.

Hey, look who I found walking over. Oh, really?

Hey, Colonel. You found me on my couch, Brown.

You were thinking about coming over here to walk and talk to Edna. I read your

mind. I'm a mind reader.

Maybe I'm the one who should do the talking.

Colonel, I know I've been acting a little ugly lately, but I

know how you feel about me.

Hello?

Yeah, she here, but she can't come to the phone right now because she's

with Colonel.

Yes, yes, yes, they always argue. I didn't even put you in their business.

Did you? Yes.

What time?

Okay, I'll tell her. All right, bye.

Edna, Rodney said he'll be here at 8 to pick you up on your date.

Hey.

So you're back to your old ways again, huh? Look, I can explain.

No, you don't have to explain. I'm going home.

Alone.

You done hurt him.

Hey, welcome home, baby.

Hello. Oh, I love my pretty flowers.

I'm glad.

Ooh, looking like this, you're going to get a lot more than that.

I got your message, and I'm so excited about dinner.

Me too. You know, just you, me, Troy.

Troy? I invited him to dinner with us. I tried to say no, but he insisted.

Oh, well, maybe you didn't try hard enough. Oh, you know how persuasive I

be. We were supposed to double, but my date canceled on me.

So I guess that makes us a threesome. Yeah, no.

Well, hey, I got to run upstairs and grab something real quick. I'll be right

back.

Okay, Troy, what the hell do you think you're doing?

I'm about to have dinner with you and your husband. Are you crazy?

Sasha, relax.

I'm not going to say anything.

Okay, well, there's nothing to say.

So why are you so nervous?

You're enjoying this, aren't you?

I enjoy dinner with friends.

All right.

Y 'all ready to go?

Um, baby, I was actually just telling Dr.

Crane that I'm not really feeling well. I'm kind of tired.

So why don't you guys just go and celebrate?

Oh, no, sweetheart. I mean, I want you to be a part of this. No, you and I will

celebrate whenever you get back.

You sure?

Yes, I'm positive.

Okay. Okay. All right.

Good night.

Good night, Sasha.

Hurry back, baby.

Car?

Yes? I hope this works, because I'm so sick of Edna eating up all the food,

watching the TV, and breathing up all my air. Oh, it's going to work, Mr.

Graham. Nothing brings a couple together like a lovely, romantic dinner for two.

I hope it's a dinner to go for two, because I'm sick of it.

Thank you, Cora.

Oh, lovely. What do you think, Brown? My mama said if you can't say nothing

nice, don't say nothing at all.

I can't resist it. Why are you standing there looking like... You looking. Look

at you.

You look a mess.

Oh,

this is lovely. I sure hope it works.

It will work. What's taking the Colonel so long? Did you tell him, Mr. Brown?

Yes. Well, maybe he's not going to show.

He ain't that smart.

Brown.

Oh, speaking of the dummy.

Hey, dummy.

What the hell is this?

What does it look like?

I thought you said we were going bowling.

I did. I lied. Lord forgive me. Now sit down, shut up, and eat dinner.

Sit down.

I slaved over a hot microwave.

Something smells good.

That's that perfume you brought me.

I wore it just for you.

I was talking about the mac and cheese.

I made that, too.

I put a little behind my ears.

You desperate, cheesy goat.

More wine, you raw hynamus?

I don't mind if I do. What year is this, Brown?

This year is fresh.

She keep eating like she eating, she gonna have a whole bunch of rolls.

Look at your middle. You shut it up.

I'm about to shut up your middle.

Why don't you go home? Why don't you grow a neck, you little brown crayon?

can't tell me nothing.

Brown,

brown, brown, hold on. Listen, I'm not gonna allow you to stay here and talk to

my fiancé like this.

Did you say fiancé?

Did I say fiancé?

Yeah, you said fiancé.

You know what? In Latin, that means, Edna, pack your stuff and get out. What?

Just walk this way.

Come on.

Come on.

I do miss you, Edna.

I miss you, too, Colonel.

Y 'all gonna make me throw up if y 'all keep on with this.

Edna, please come back home.

Oh, you ain't got to say it twice.

You better be glad he asked you once. Hey, Colonel, get a leash and walk home.

Just get... Come on, bro.

Yes, they have. Leave.

Bye. Here, put it in a dog bowl.

Well, I despite you, too. Why don't you despite me at home? Hey, listen.

Now,

look, I'm not going to stand here and watch you talk to my woman like that

because it's going to seriously jeopardize our friendship. Well, we can

jeopardize it if you want.

What do you want to do? What do you want to do?

Colonel. Yeah. You still want to go bowl? Sure, I do.

Colonel, we're going to bowl.

Oh,

honey, I'll see you at home.

Yeah,

well, you sure came back from dinner quick.

Well, that's because I couldn't stop thinking about dessert.

How was your first day?

Oh, it was great. Yeah? It was great. It felt really good to be back in the

trenches again, you know?

Baby, it's so nice to see you back in your element again. Yeah, I know.

Now, finally, things here can just...

You know, get back to the way they were.

Well, I have something to tell you.

What is it?

Well, you know we've been through a lot of tough times lately.

And it's been really hard on both of us. Yeah, I know.

And that's been mostly my fault.

And I apologize for that.

But I'm going to do the best I can to make it up to you, okay?

Well,

one day I was so upset.

that I went out and I... I, um...

bought a new dress without telling you.

That's all?

Oh.

That's nothing.

Oh, that's nothing. I don't care about that. Hell, you should have bought

yourself two dresses.

All I care about is me and you being together.

I love you.

Check. Famous. Check.

Drink.

God damn it.

Hmm.

Okay. What?

Donald, what you doing here?

End up with me out.

Well, go back home.

I'm here now.

Want some sandwich?