Original subtitles

Nurse Jane, what are you doing? Uh, er...

Matron has a locket. Is that hers?

SHE STUTTERS

I hadn't realised it was a personal box.

You should be in bed. I need help with my exercises.

Then I'll be there in a minute.

Back to bed. Go on. Scoot.

Do you really think she was trying to take the locket?

I did catch her going through Matron's things. Thanks.

But we can't check inside. We don't know where the key is.

Well, hardly the master criminal. She left the key on the desk.

Do try to hurry, Darrell.

FOOTSTEPS

Darrell, quickly! She's coming back.

The locket's still there.

Er...

What are you two up to?

Uh, there's a fly in the room.

Oh!

Got it.

Sorry.

It was driving us crazy.

And it takes two of you, does it?

Sally, you'll be late for lessons - out.

Darrell, back to bed and stay put.

Go, go, go.

ALL CHANT: This is the game of dedication.

No repetition or hesitation.

The category is...

..teachers.

Mr Parker...

..Mamselle...

..Nurse Jane...

..Miss Grayling...

..Miss Grayling.

Oh, oh!

Well, 25 years as head.

That's why the fair needs to be tiptop, to celebrate Miss Grayling.

Mm.

You'll love the May Fair.

It's great fun. The whole village comes.

I wish we weren't running the Hook a Duck stall, though.

It's so easy.

It's not when they're in the water.

Why would you do that?

So that I can have a proper go.

Here, Ducky Ducky!

Look at Jo.

Jo, what are you doing?

She tipped the ducks in.

They're supposed to be in a tub, not the stream.

Well, why didn't someone tell me?

We can't lose them. We'll have no stall.

But I think I can catch them.

Jo, be careful.

It's all right.

I got one.

We need more than one.

This is the only one left?

These ducks have been at every fair since I was a girl.

Sorry, I didn't think.

We've talked about this, Josephine.

Think before you act. I know, and I really am sorry.

Now the Second are without a stall.

They could help the First Form hand out the programmes?

That's so boring.

And whose fault is that?

Is this a maypole?

Oh, yes. I'd quite forgotten.

WE used to dance around it every year.

Used to?

Not since the war.

It was terrific fun. Really the centre of the whole fair.

So let's do it again this year.

What could possibly be better?

CLOCK CHIMES

Our cue to find a maypole.

Thank you, Miss Wilson.

Where is Jo, anyway?

Well, she rushed off earlier. Didn't say why.

What if Nurse Jane realises she missed lunch?

She'll be in so much trouble.

Where have you been?

Preparing a surprise.

Come and see.

Look, there they are. Jo, it's...

It's perfect.

Where on earth did you find it?

Miss Grayling thought it was behind the stables.

And it was.

Well, a round of applause for Mr Parker and Fred.

You found it! It's not that heavy.

Miss Grayling, look at the maypole!

Isn't it fabulous?

It's wonderful. Truly.

I couldn't have done it without Fred and Mr Parker.

Thank you both. It looks splendid.

MR PARKER: Hard work, but worth the effort.

FRED: Yeah. And Jo's promised us cake.

Miss Grayling, I've done this before.

Um, can I teach everyone some dances?

Well, I have given the Fourth the day for fair prep.

Why not the Second too?

How brilliant!

I'll leave you to it, then.

Thank you. Thank you. A whole day without lessons!

Don't let us down, girls.

It's all thanks to Jo. What do these dances look like?

Now we have the maypole, I can show you.

I think I need to see Nurse Jane.

That's good.

You'll be back playing lacrosse before you know it.

I hope so. I hate being stuck in.

Oh. Well, I'd never have guessed.

You're so good at that. Who taught you?

Oh, I had a great consultant on an orthopaedic ward.

In London? Oh, no. Bradford.

I'd love to go to London.

Bit of a dream of mine, to be honest. One day.

Absolutely. You should go - one day.

Where's my head?

I forgot to check the dorms.

Right. You rest now, you hear?

Right.

Five, six, seven, eight.

That's it.

HANDS CLAP

Yes, you've got it.

HANDS CLAP

HANDS CLAP

Now spin.

No, Jo! Jo! Keep spinning!

No, Jo, wait! No! Stop!

It's spinning the wrong way.

No!

Run!

You tied that up.

I thought it was just you girls.

Well, Fred was helping.

Or at least he was trying.

Get these off of me!

See the girl who's May Queen? Yes.

Guess who it is. Watch it!

Oh, my goodness, that's Miss Grayling.

Oh, that's so sweet.

25 years as Head deserves a present.

If I get this framed, you could present it to her. Yes!

Um, girls, Miss Grayling was May Queen!

Oh, perhaps we could have a May Queen, too.

She could present the photo.

Yes. June, you could be it. You're head of form.

No, it should be you, Jo.

You're the one who made all of this happen.

Really?

I mean...really?

Hello?

Oh, shush.

They've just made me May Queen.

If I'm queen, I'll need a very fancy dress.

Susan, look at this.

I didn't know people dressed like that for May fairs.

It's perfect.

It won't be easy to make, though.

It is very traditional, and Jo would look amazing.

Daddy's so excited that I'm May Queen.

You called him again?

It's all right. No-one saw.

He said I'll make a beautiful queen.

Well, he'll be even more excited

when he hears about your brilliant costume.

Oh, I can't wait.

I'm so happy

Yes, I'm so happy

I'm so happy

La la la la la la

La la la la la-aa.

Daddy loves my songs!

FOOTSTEPS

Mamselle asked about your prep.

Never mind that. Nurse Jane said that she's never been to London.

I mean, the nursing agency is definitely there.

I found it on a leaflet in Matron's desk.

Yes, here.

Matron told us the agency had found the perfect person.

Well, maybe we should call them. If she catches us snooping...

Darrell, let's just dig a bit more first

and see if we catch her out again.

Yes, but, Sally, if we do, then we have to confront her.

Mm-hm.

Easy, Darrell.

We have to wait for the right moment.

THROWS CRUTCHES

Please.

We need to take our time and make a plan.

And that's another one done.

We just need four more.

We haven't finished the headdress yet, but she'll get the idea.

I can't wait to see.

Do I look pretty?

It's brilliant, Jo.

Well, let me see.

Ta-da!

The fair now has its own Jack in the Green.

But I look like a tree. You're supposed to. It's tradition.

May Queens are more recent.

But what is it?

It's kind of a tree spirit.

It creates mischief and chaos.

That sounds like you, Jo.

So...I'm not the May Queen, I'm the Jack in the Green?

Yes, but it's heaps more fun.

Queens are so dull.

Don't you like it? Hmm.

Uh...

It just surprised me, that's all.

Really?

Honestly. It's marvellous.

You're such a good sport.

Jo.

Package for you. Mr Parker asked me to bring it up.

Chris is going to decorate Nugget's harness.

He's going to look brilliant.

Lucky horse.

Oh, gosh.

What a gorgeous dress.

Isn't it just?

Daddy sent it.

"To my May Queen"?

I really do look like a queen.

But Jo, they're finishing your costume right now.

Daddy wasn't to know.

I'll just explain to him.

You'll still wear ours?

Of course.

This doesn't matter.

Not one jot.

We need to get going. Coming, Jo?

Oh, I'll catch you up later.

Oh, I don't want to be a tree.

SHE MOANS

Look at Nugget. Isn't she splendid?

And you'll look splendid, too.

Splendid?

Dressed as a tree?

Here it is.

You'll be covered from head to toe. Oh.

Um...will people even see my face?

That doesn't matter. It's tradition.

Have you any change?

Enough for a go on the tin cans.

I've had enough of this, Nugget.

I am not being laughed at.

Step right up.

Test your strength.

Coconut shy.

Hit one. Hit them all!

All it takes is a ball.

Splat the rat. Win a prize!

Can I try again? Yes. Thank you.

And...go!

Oh, it's impossible.

Donne-moi ca.

Thank you.

Ready?

Three, two, one...

BANG

Oh!

Prends ca, Monsieur Rat! Crikey!

What do I win?

Merci. Thank you.

The parade's in ten minutes.

Where is everybody?

Nugget's loose. Jo must be in her costume. It's not here.

But there's a bit over there and some more there.

Has anyone taken it?

SHE GASPS

Nugget!

Is he eating the costume?

I'm sure I tied him up earlier.

There's nothing left. Look.

He can't have eaten the whole costume.

He must have.

Susan and Felicity worked so hard.

We can't have a Jack in the Green with no costume.

This is a disaster.

This doesn't make any sense.

Sorry. Sorry.

I ran as fast as I could.

What a beautiful dress!

Daddy got it.

I thought I'd better throw it on.

Naughty Nugget ate the Jack in the Green costume.

Such a shame.

Look what I found.

Nugget's innocent.

It was hidden over there.

Gosh, who would do that?

You would.

You hid the costume so you could wear your new dress, didn't you?

That's a terrible thing to say.

It's true, though, isn't it?

You tried to trick us, Jo.

If you wanted to wear your dress, you could have just said so.

We're your friends. We'd understand.

THEY SIGH

Please...

Wait!

I really am sorry.

Please, listen!

I have to make this right.

I mean, I need to.

Wait, please!

You've been so good with your exercises,

I might try and win something at the fair for you.

Oh, I'd like that, thanks.

I used to love the fair back home. I never missed it.

Not once.

You must have missed it sometimes.

What about when you worked in London?

But Nurse Jane's never been to London.

You've got that wrong. Well, she must have.

Because the nursing agency is in London.

What is this, the Spanish Inquisition?

I was working at Bradford Royal Infirmary,

then I heard about the agency,

so I gave them a call, got an interview

and dashed down to London.

Got this job, got on the first train here.

I'll, er, grab my purse.

It sounds plausible.

Why would her dream be to go to London

when she's literally just been there?

It doesn't make sense. What do we do now?

I'll telephone the agency while you're at the fair.

It's the only way to find out the truth.

Right, I'm ready.

Sally, are you coming or what? I hear Cook has baked scones.

We'll need one each. On me.

Good luck!

BELL RINGS

Jean. Do you know what I could take to cheer Darrell up?

Well, I think she likes coconuts.

Mm. It doesn't look too hard.

I'm afraid the line is busy. Please try later.

Thank you. Goodbye.

Oh! Bad luck.

Your turn.

Word of warning, though. I haven't seen anyone hit one yet.

Oh, we'll see about that.

DIAL WHIRS

DIAL WHIRS

Yes.

Terrific shots!

You just need to give it some oomph.

Oomph? Right.

Right.

Let's get these back to Darrell.

Please hold the line.

Um, I want a coconut, too.

Can you teach me the technique?

Well, it's a ball, Clarissa. You just throw it at the coconut.

You just need to give it some oomph.

Thank you for holding. Connecting you now.

Darrell?

Darrell. She's coming.

Nurse Jane's coming. The line was busy

and I couldn't talk to the reception.

It took ages to put me through to the right person.

We'll just have to call again later.

I've got coconuts.

Oh, Sally, you must have raced back.

Not really, but I brought back the scones.

Clever you. Darrell, look! Coconut.

You won it? No-one ever wins. First throw.

Er, that leg should be up.

Right, I'm going to find something to crack these beauties.

Sorry I couldn't hold her off longer.

I'll just have to telephone again later.

Right. Let Operation Coconut commence!

Ready, ladies?

OK.

Stand back. Two, three...

BANG

Oh!

CHATTER AND APPLAUSE

Ow!

THEY LAUGH

I'm doing everything wrong, aren't I?

Jo.

It's useless.

Listen! They love you being funny.

Come on. Up you get.

That's better.

Please welcome our Jack in the Green.

Three cheers for Jo! Without her, we'd have no maypole.

Hip, hip. Hooray!

Hip, hip. Hooray!

Hip, hip! Hooray!

Whoo!

This is from us.

To say thank you

for being the real queen of Malory Towers for 25 years.

Oh! It's lovely.

Now, I think tradition dictates...

Josephine?

I command the dancing to commence!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

LAUGHTER

Come on lads, to our post.

Oi!

We have to get her out of there. The agency will shut soon.

KNOCKS ON DOOR

Nurse Jane?

Let's watch the dancing.

And you could take the dorm register after.

Right.

Er, well, many hands make light work.

You take upper school...

Er, Darrell, you're to stay in bed, OK?

Off you pop. Go on.

MUSIC PLAYS

RHYTHMIC CLAPPING

Operator.

Yes, Bayswater 2704, please.

Er, you're to ask before you use the telephone.

And what did we just discuss?

Er, staying in bed? Yes. Sorry.

Who were you calling?

No-one.

Er, well, obviously someone.

My father - I just wanted to tell him

how much your exercises were helping me.

I don't know what you're up to, Darrell,

but if I say you're to stay in bed, that's what needs to happen.

Do you understand?

Mm-hm.

I can't get out of bed without those.

Exactly. Because I've told you before,

you have to stay put, for your own good.

MUSIC PLAYS

RHYTHMIC CLAPPING

SHE CHUCKLES

Oh!

SHE LAUGHS

LAUGHTER AND CHEERING OUTSIDE

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