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1
00:00:53,920 --> 00:00:59,381
Hey, Lovejoy! Why don't you call Rotterdam
and tell them it's not coming?
2
00:00:59,426 --> 00:01:01,690
I never had a deal with the Dutch, Harry.
3
00:01:01,728 --> 00:01:05,755
(Laughing) That's your story,
and you're sticking to it.
4
00:01:05,799 --> 00:01:08,893
Nice working with you boys. Bye, Lovejoy.
5
00:01:08,935 --> 00:01:11,836
Well, it's nice working with you, Harry.
6
00:01:11,871 --> 00:01:15,034
- (Harry) Bye!
- Bye!
7
00:01:16,242 --> 00:01:18,506
Yeah!
8
00:01:20,547 --> 00:01:23,983
Three hundred thousand dollars,
if you remember.
9
00:01:24,017 --> 00:01:29,853
But... pay a few debts. Put a down payment
on your daughter's first flat.
10
00:01:29,889 --> 00:01:34,087
Give yourself a brief change of scene,
and bingo, it's gone.
11
00:01:34,127 --> 00:01:36,891
Well, almost gone.
12
00:01:58,184 --> 00:02:00,414
This is what I missed.
13
00:02:07,193 --> 00:02:12,358
Gave up the game. Went to live in Spain
to see if I could remember how to paint.
14
00:02:12,398 --> 00:02:15,026
- (Man) Hello, Lovejoy.
- Hi, how are you?
15
00:02:15,068 --> 00:02:18,765
No, not fakes, the real thing.
Just to see if I could.
16
00:02:19,539 --> 00:02:21,803
I can't.
17
00:02:21,841 --> 00:02:25,106
Who wants a Lovejoy
when you can have a Utrillo?
18
00:02:28,815 --> 00:02:30,976
A fake Utrillo?
19
00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:36,519
Perhaps I have returned
a better and a wiser man.
20
00:02:37,690 --> 00:02:41,148
Who knows? Anyway, I'm back.
21
00:02:41,194 --> 00:02:43,185
Hm! Thank you.
22
00:02:45,431 --> 00:02:47,661
It's time to renew old friendships.
23
00:02:53,973 --> 00:02:55,941
(Dog barks)
24
00:02:57,076 --> 00:02:59,135
(Car door shuts)
25
00:03:14,060 --> 00:03:15,857
What's this? Am I supposed to
26
00:03:15,895 --> 00:03:18,489
- go into raptures, fall at your feet?
- Janey!
27
00:03:18,531 --> 00:03:21,898
- Where have you been, Lovejoy?
- You've cut your hair.
28
00:03:21,935 --> 00:03:25,166
- What?
- You've cut your hair. It suits you.
29
00:03:25,205 --> 00:03:30,438
Don't change the subject. You walk out of
my life without so much as a by-your-leave.
30
00:03:30,476 --> 00:03:33,639
- Be reasonable. You were in New York.
- Reasonable?
31
00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:35,739
I get more reason from a horse.
32
00:03:35,782 --> 00:03:38,876
What's that you're wearing?
You look ridiculous.
33
00:03:38,918 --> 00:03:41,580
I come home for this?
I'm not even married to the woman.
34
00:03:41,621 --> 00:03:45,216
Six months, and not even a single word.
You could have been dead.
35
00:03:45,258 --> 00:03:47,123
I sent you a postcard.
36
00:03:47,160 --> 00:03:50,129
Postcard? We're supposed to be partners.
37
00:03:50,163 --> 00:03:53,564
I didn't receive it. And who reads postcards?
38
00:03:55,201 --> 00:03:57,465
Brought you a present.
39
00:04:01,007 --> 00:04:05,376
- Alex always buys me perfume.
- Try sticking that behind your ears.
40
00:04:06,346 --> 00:04:09,645
Oh, come here, you...
41
00:04:09,682 --> 00:04:11,809
(Both laugh)
42
00:04:11,851 --> 00:04:13,182
I missed you.
43
00:04:15,955 --> 00:04:20,483
I thought it was time we had a break from
each other. Give you back to your husband.
44
00:04:20,526 --> 00:04:23,552
I never left him.
He was in New York too, remember?
45
00:04:23,596 --> 00:04:27,999
(Tuts) That's what I mean. He still there?
46
00:04:28,034 --> 00:04:32,027
In Hong Kong. Back on Sunday, I think.
47
00:04:32,071 --> 00:04:34,039
Did it work out for you, this break?
48
00:04:34,073 --> 00:04:37,941
Discovered I couldn't paint, again.
49
00:04:37,977 --> 00:04:40,571
I think I put that one to rest, Janey.
50
00:04:40,613 --> 00:04:45,516
I got involved in a cactus-growing operation.
Got stung.
51
00:04:45,551 --> 00:04:48,679
Oh, and I nearly got married. Twice.
52
00:04:48,721 --> 00:04:51,315
Welcome home, Lovejoy.
53
00:04:52,558 --> 00:04:54,185
Oh, Janey, the cottage.
54
00:04:54,227 --> 00:04:57,890
- Oh, sorry, we've already...
- No, no, no.
55
00:04:57,930 --> 00:05:01,661
Landed on my feet again,
house-sitting for a friend in Spain.
56
00:05:01,701 --> 00:05:04,932
- Casablanca.
- Casablanca's in Morocco.
57
00:05:04,971 --> 00:05:07,496
No, it's in Upper Deeping, actually.
58
00:05:07,540 --> 00:05:10,031
But that's just down the road.
59
00:05:10,076 --> 00:05:13,739
- So we're back in business?
- Janey.
60
00:05:13,780 --> 00:05:16,078
- Come for supper tonight.
- I'd love to.
61
00:05:16,115 --> 00:05:19,573
Eight o'clock.
And take that bloody awful suit off.
62
00:05:21,721 --> 00:05:24,315
One down, two to go.
63
00:05:25,058 --> 00:05:27,083
(Dogs barking)
64
00:05:32,231 --> 00:05:35,200
- (Dogs barking and snarling)
- Good boy. Good boy. Here.
65
00:05:35,868 --> 00:05:37,768
(Crescendo of barks)
66
00:05:40,473 --> 00:05:42,839
(Dogs barking and snarling)
67
00:05:51,551 --> 00:05:55,487
When I suggested you get some security,
I didn't mean for you to take me literally.
68
00:05:55,521 --> 00:06:00,754
- What are you doing here? This is the enemy.
- No, it isn't. It's a good job with prospects.
69
00:06:00,793 --> 00:06:05,059
Since you've been gone, I've done a business
development course. I've got a word processor.
70
00:06:05,098 --> 00:06:08,397
- I saw a safe this morning, a prototype.
- Get away with you.
71
00:06:08,434 --> 00:06:12,598
Yeah, it's got a laser. Takes a picture
of your eye. Stores it in the memory.
72
00:06:12,638 --> 00:06:17,234
You look at it, it opens. You ought to get one.
It'd do wonders for your insurance hassles.
73
00:06:17,276 --> 00:06:21,474
A job? A job? You've got antiques
in your blood, Eric. You've got a good eye.
74
00:06:21,514 --> 00:06:25,075
- Have I?
- Yeah, you can't be a whore to commerce.
75
00:06:25,118 --> 00:06:28,144
- I can't?
- No. What's it gonna do for you?
76
00:06:28,187 --> 00:06:30,712
You're a craftsman. An artisan.
77
00:06:30,757 --> 00:06:32,748
Well, you will be.
78
00:06:36,562 --> 00:06:40,828
- This yours?
- Mine, and it's paid for. Well, nearly.
79
00:06:40,867 --> 00:06:45,133
- I'm a new man since you've been gone.
- Well, I preferred the old one, Eric.
80
00:06:45,171 --> 00:06:47,833
The footloose, the romantic, the poet.
81
00:06:47,874 --> 00:06:49,432
The dreamer.
82
00:06:49,475 --> 00:06:51,238
- Where's Tink?
- Ah.
83
00:07:34,687 --> 00:07:37,281
(Whispers) There he is, look.
84
00:07:37,323 --> 00:07:39,052
(Lovejoy) Psst!
85
00:07:39,826 --> 00:07:42,124
(Both) Psst!
86
00:07:42,161 --> 00:07:44,061
Tinker!
87
00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:13,088
Goodness on such a colossal scale
is wondrous to behold, Lovejoy.
88
00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:15,984
Rising an hour before dawn.
89
00:08:16,028 --> 00:08:20,795
After cold ablutions,
two hours of silent meditation
90
00:08:20,833 --> 00:08:25,270
before partaking
of an humble breakfast of arrowroot.
91
00:08:25,304 --> 00:08:27,636
Got you out just in time,
by the sound of it, Tink.
92
00:08:27,673 --> 00:08:30,233
Oh, you did, lad, you did.
93
00:08:30,276 --> 00:08:33,302
God bless you both!
94
00:08:52,965 --> 00:08:54,933
She wasn't yours to sell, Eric.
95
00:08:54,967 --> 00:08:59,370
She wasn't yours either. Lady Jane said
I could have her, after you just bolted off.
96
00:08:59,405 --> 00:09:01,873
That's true, Lovejoy, as God is our witness.
97
00:09:01,908 --> 00:09:06,106
This car paid
for my business development course.
98
00:09:06,145 --> 00:09:09,046
All right, how much, Fred?
99
00:09:09,081 --> 00:09:11,242
Well, I have done quite a bit on her.
100
00:09:11,284 --> 00:09:13,616
- Do you want to have a look?
- No, no, I don't.
101
00:09:13,653 --> 00:09:15,553
To Fred Barber.
102
00:09:15,588 --> 00:09:18,079
I don't want to sell her. I love her to bits.
103
00:09:18,124 --> 00:09:21,025
But it's the government,
those bloody student loans.
104
00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:23,460
Yeah, well, this should cover it.
105
00:09:24,897 --> 00:09:28,196
- Yeah. Thanks.
- Thank you.
106
00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:30,134
Tinker?
107
00:09:30,169 --> 00:09:33,969
Er... I don't want to... Well, you know.
108
00:09:34,006 --> 00:09:37,703
- But this check...
- Oh, God is our witness, Fred.
109
00:09:37,743 --> 00:09:42,112
Or Lady Jane Felsham of Felsham Hall
if you want an earthly guarantor.
110
00:09:42,148 --> 00:09:45,311
Right. OK, well, cheers.
111
00:09:45,351 --> 00:09:47,785
- Goodbye, Myrtle.
- (All) Myrtle?
112
00:09:47,820 --> 00:09:49,720
Now, I think I ought to warn you...
113
00:09:49,755 --> 00:09:52,553
Lovejoy, you shouldn't have!
114
00:09:55,194 --> 00:09:57,754
(Sounds horn)
115
00:10:20,987 --> 00:10:25,287
(Eric) Well, if this is the right place,
Lovejoy, you've cracked it!
116
00:10:25,324 --> 00:10:27,918
Why is your landlord inside, Lovejoy?
117
00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:30,622
I said he was in Spain, not inside.
118
00:10:30,663 --> 00:10:33,223
What did you do, rob a bank?
119
00:10:34,266 --> 00:10:37,235
Ah! Couldn't stay away, eh, Jane?
120
00:10:37,269 --> 00:10:39,703
Welcome to my humble abode.
121
00:10:40,706 --> 00:10:43,266
- Shangri-la!
- Casablanca!
122
00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:47,439
Eric! Oh! I... I don't know
whether to kiss you or salute you.
123
00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:50,574
- Well, I know which I'd prefer.
- Oh...
124
00:10:52,351 --> 00:10:54,285
Oh, Tinker!
125
00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:58,279
- You look divine.
- For my sins.
126
00:10:58,324 --> 00:10:59,951
Oh, thank you!
127
00:10:59,992 --> 00:11:02,586
- Oh, I have missed you boys.
- Yeah.
128
00:11:02,628 --> 00:11:06,257
- And how are you, Lady Jane?
- All the better for seeing you.
129
00:11:06,298 --> 00:11:10,792
- What's in here, Janey?
- Your bag and a little housewarming gift.
130
00:11:10,836 --> 00:11:12,201
Champagne?
131
00:11:12,238 --> 00:11:15,503
I knew after six months
you'd be short of bread
132
00:11:15,541 --> 00:11:16,974
so...
133
00:11:18,077 --> 00:11:20,910
- see you later, and...
- I won't be late.
134
00:11:20,946 --> 00:11:22,937
Bye, boys.
135
00:11:24,917 --> 00:11:26,908
Olé.
136
00:11:28,054 --> 00:11:32,081
I'm not saying I'm coming back, Lovejoy.
That way lies madness.
137
00:11:34,093 --> 00:11:38,427
But I will come in and file your stuff
up for you, of an evening,
138
00:11:38,464 --> 00:11:40,329
just for old times' sake, like.
139
00:11:40,366 --> 00:11:43,233
And, er, perhaps do the odd weekend job.
140
00:11:43,269 --> 00:11:44,793
Your choice, Eric.
141
00:11:44,837 --> 00:11:47,465
Can't say I'm not disappointed.
142
00:11:47,506 --> 00:11:49,633
I mean, I've had my midlife crisis.
143
00:11:49,675 --> 00:11:52,974
Happens to some people earlier than others.
Tinker's done his penance.
144
00:11:53,012 --> 00:11:54,673
Amen to that.
145
00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:57,308
For us it's business as usual.
146
00:12:34,820 --> 00:12:36,287
(Jane) Lovejoy.
147
00:12:36,322 --> 00:12:39,120
My friend, Victoria Cavero.
148
00:12:39,158 --> 00:12:42,252
- Victoria...
- Victoria. I've got a daughter called Victoria.
149
00:12:42,294 --> 00:12:44,091
...this is Lovejoy.
150
00:12:44,130 --> 00:12:46,928
It's very kind of you
to come to my rescue, Mr. Lovejoy.
151
00:12:46,966 --> 00:12:48,433
Just Lovejoy.
152
00:12:57,076 --> 00:12:59,408
We've been friends for years.
153
00:12:59,445 --> 00:13:03,006
- We were at Benenden together.
- How long will you be staying with Jane?
154
00:13:03,048 --> 00:13:06,415
- I don't really know.
- She's just come back from Peru.
155
00:13:06,452 --> 00:13:08,352
- Holiday?
- No, I live there.
156
00:13:08,387 --> 00:13:10,150
Oh.
157
00:13:10,189 --> 00:13:13,784
Almost as soon as I left school,
I did what my mother said I should never do.
158
00:13:13,826 --> 00:13:18,229
- What was that?
- I got married. He was Peruvian.
159
00:13:18,264 --> 00:13:20,459
We went to live in Lima.
160
00:13:20,499 --> 00:13:25,027
- Jorge was a brilliant lawyer.
- Was?
161
00:13:25,070 --> 00:13:27,061
He was murdered three months ago.
162
00:13:27,106 --> 00:13:29,267
Murdered?
163
00:13:29,308 --> 00:13:32,141
I'm sorry. Who by?
164
00:13:32,178 --> 00:13:36,444
It could have been the extreme left.
Or the fascists, the government.
165
00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:40,384
He offended them all at some time or other.
He wasn't afraid to speak out.
166
00:13:41,921 --> 00:13:45,379
I had to leave the country.
I got here yesterday.
167
00:13:45,424 --> 00:13:47,358
I promised you'd help, Lovejoy.
168
00:13:47,393 --> 00:13:50,487
- Help?
- Have a look at this.
169
00:13:56,602 --> 00:13:59,503
- It's pre-Colombian.
- Yes.
170
00:13:59,538 --> 00:14:02,166
If you look, you can see there's a mark.
171
00:14:02,208 --> 00:14:06,975
It's supposed to be the ring that Atahualpa,
god king of the Incas, gave to his bride
172
00:14:07,012 --> 00:14:09,003
on their wedding day.
173
00:14:11,217 --> 00:14:14,015
Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you, Victoria,
174
00:14:14,053 --> 00:14:17,352
but these rings are quite commonplace.
They're worth about $500.
175
00:14:17,389 --> 00:14:19,823
- But this one's unique.
- Oh.
176
00:14:20,726 --> 00:14:23,524
Before he was killed,
my husband was threatened.
177
00:14:23,562 --> 00:14:28,261
He knew its value. He was going to sell it
to get funds for the campesinos.
178
00:14:28,300 --> 00:14:29,961
Campesinos?
179
00:14:30,002 --> 00:14:33,460
The Indians made destitute
by the greed of our politicians.
180
00:14:33,505 --> 00:14:37,202
Victoria feels that while she has the ring,
she may be in danger.
181
00:14:37,243 --> 00:14:41,111
- Danger from whom?
- From the same people who killed Jorge.
182
00:14:41,146 --> 00:14:44,843
- But they're in Peru.
- They're everywhere, Lovejoy.
183
00:14:44,884 --> 00:14:49,116
- Why would they want to kill you?
- I was involved with the campesinos too.
184
00:14:49,154 --> 00:14:50,587
Girls...
185
00:14:50,623 --> 00:14:56,027
this does sound a bit far-fetched,
but if it makes you happy, I'll stay the night.
186
00:14:56,061 --> 00:14:58,086
No, Lovejoy.
187
00:14:58,130 --> 00:15:02,794
No, what we're asking is for you
to take the ring away and sell it.
188
00:15:02,835 --> 00:15:05,804
Janey, it's Friday night.
189
00:15:05,838 --> 00:15:08,807
I've just got back in the country. I'm in
a new house. I haven't even got a Rottweiler.
190
00:15:08,841 --> 00:15:10,365
Stick it back in your safe.
191
00:15:10,409 --> 00:15:13,867
- But supposing someone breaks in?
- No one's gonna break in here.
192
00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:17,644
Everyone in the county knows Alex
has got this place wired up like Fort Knox.
193
00:15:20,085 --> 00:15:22,383
It's all right, Lovejoy.
194
00:15:28,894 --> 00:15:31,488
(Church bell tolling)
195
00:15:37,536 --> 00:15:40,937
Oh, darling, I've caused so much trouble
to you and to Lovejoy.
196
00:15:40,973 --> 00:15:43,669
Oh, not at all. He's in his element.
197
00:15:45,711 --> 00:15:49,875
Janey? Is there something
going on between you two?
198
00:15:49,915 --> 00:15:51,678
Oh, Good Lord, no!
199
00:15:51,717 --> 00:15:53,810
He's... my business partner.
200
00:15:53,852 --> 00:15:55,752
Yes, but you seem very close.
201
00:15:55,788 --> 00:15:59,622
Well, of course, he's... like a brother to me.
202
00:15:59,658 --> 00:16:02,388
He doesn't look at you like a brother.
203
00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:12,063
Yes, Dennis, there are two ladies up there on
their own, and I'm a little worried about them.
204
00:16:12,104 --> 00:16:17,303
So if you could divert a patrol car for five
minutes to check on 'em, I'd appreciate it.
205
00:16:17,343 --> 00:16:20,369
Much obliged. Thank you very much, Dennis.
206
00:16:20,412 --> 00:16:22,209
(Eric) This is ridiculous.
207
00:16:22,247 --> 00:16:25,944
A security guard breaking into his own office
in the middle of the night
208
00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:28,385
to steal the bloody safe!
209
00:16:28,420 --> 00:16:30,411
I'd have lost my job if we'd got caught.
210
00:16:30,456 --> 00:16:33,152
Well, you could have told them
their security was working, Eric.
211
00:16:33,192 --> 00:16:37,720
Ha-ha. This has got to be back first thing
Monday morning.
212
00:16:37,763 --> 00:16:41,164
- Now would you tell us what you want it for?
- Certainly.
213
00:16:41,200 --> 00:16:46,103
I have here the ring that the god king Atahualpa
gave his bride on their wedding day.
214
00:16:46,138 --> 00:16:49,107
Worth probably one million dollars.
215
00:16:53,145 --> 00:16:57,241
Worth maybe 500 dollars.
216
00:16:57,282 --> 00:17:00,376
It's pre-Colombian semiprecious turquoise.
217
00:17:00,419 --> 00:17:02,910
Peruvians dig 'em up
in their back garden every day.
218
00:17:02,955 --> 00:17:05,753
Maybe, but this is on the word
of a beautiful woman,
219
00:17:05,791 --> 00:17:11,229
and there's a lot of bad people out there who
think it's worth enough to threaten her and us
220
00:17:11,263 --> 00:17:13,493
if they think I've gone off with it.
221
00:17:14,600 --> 00:17:18,001
- D'you want to see how this thing works?
- You've told me.
222
00:17:18,037 --> 00:17:21,234
I mean, I stare at it and hey presto...
223
00:17:22,207 --> 00:17:25,836
- It doesn't open, Eric.
- When I stare at it, I said.
224
00:17:25,878 --> 00:17:31,942
You see, this laser reflects off my retina
and creates what they call a speckle.
225
00:17:31,984 --> 00:17:33,781
Now, that pattern's stored,
226
00:17:33,819 --> 00:17:38,654
then the laser reads the pattern on my eye
and compares it with the pattern in the safe.
227
00:17:38,690 --> 00:17:41,784
Just get on with it
and open the safe, would you, Eric?
228
00:17:41,827 --> 00:17:43,317
Yeah, right.
229
00:17:44,329 --> 00:17:46,524
You're ready?
230
00:17:46,565 --> 00:17:49,432
I shall say the magic words.
231
00:17:49,468 --> 00:17:51,834
Open sesame.
232
00:17:51,870 --> 00:17:55,169
- (Beeping)
- (He laughs)
233
00:17:55,207 --> 00:17:57,675
There we are. A miracle, isn't it?
234
00:17:58,677 --> 00:18:03,808
And of course, I - note the pun -
am the only person who can make it work.
235
00:18:11,723 --> 00:18:13,918
What's this?
236
00:18:13,959 --> 00:18:20,091
Well, when I was in the priory, the monks
gave me temporary charge of the meadery.
237
00:18:20,132 --> 00:18:21,793
It's a great honor.
238
00:18:21,834 --> 00:18:25,827
They have a secret recipe
that I altered just a smidgen
239
00:18:25,871 --> 00:18:30,069
to create a monk's mead a la Tinker.
240
00:18:30,109 --> 00:18:35,342
I invited them to try it
and inspired them to a vow of silence.
241
00:18:35,380 --> 00:18:39,612
- They were legless, you mean.
- It did tend to bring them to their knees.
242
00:18:39,651 --> 00:18:40,982
Yes.
243
00:18:41,019 --> 00:18:43,419
Not to be drunk for five years, Lovejoy.
244
00:18:43,455 --> 00:18:48,017
- I want to see how it travels.
- It's not a time machine, Tink.
245
00:18:48,060 --> 00:18:51,791
- What's this?
- A tuna-fish sandwich.
246
00:18:51,830 --> 00:18:54,424
I'm checking the condensation factor.
247
00:18:57,836 --> 00:19:01,431
There you are. Safe as the Bank of England
248
00:19:11,183 --> 00:19:12,878
Oh!
249
00:19:12,918 --> 00:19:14,647
(She sighs)
250
00:19:15,220 --> 00:19:18,189
- You don't believe a word of it.
- What...
251
00:19:18,223 --> 00:19:20,691
Peruvian death squads in rural England?
252
00:19:20,726 --> 00:19:22,853
Give me a break, Jane.
253
00:19:23,762 --> 00:19:26,822
We're English. We can't imagine
what she's been through.
254
00:19:26,865 --> 00:19:29,527
Look, the ring is real. You have it.
255
00:19:29,568 --> 00:19:32,765
Sell it. That's all you're being asked to do.
OK? Please.
256
00:19:32,804 --> 00:19:37,036
- (Rings)
- Hold on. That'll be for me.
257
00:19:37,075 --> 00:19:38,269
Lovejoy.
258
00:19:38,310 --> 00:19:39,868
Hello, Douglas.
259
00:19:39,912 --> 00:19:41,937
That was quick. Who?
260
00:19:41,980 --> 00:19:44,972
Yeah, who? Mm-hm.
261
00:19:45,017 --> 00:19:47,645
No, of course I realize you have to see it.
262
00:19:48,754 --> 00:19:51,621
No, no, I won't bring it to Windsor.
263
00:19:51,657 --> 00:19:55,388
Call me back at my cottage
within the hour. Yeah.
264
00:19:56,995 --> 00:20:00,624
- Good morning, senora.
- Hello, Lovejoy.
265
00:20:00,666 --> 00:20:04,466
Well, according to Douglas Rimmer,
leading gem expert,
266
00:20:04,503 --> 00:20:08,872
if you're right about the king's mark,
we could have a buyer, an Alfredo Pereira.
267
00:20:08,907 --> 00:20:11,603
Brazilian banker. Name ring a bell?
268
00:20:11,643 --> 00:20:14,578
Pereira, Pereira. Yes.
269
00:20:14,613 --> 00:20:18,344
Isn't he the chap who's always
in the Tatler, Dempster, Harper's?
270
00:20:18,383 --> 00:20:22,285
- He plays polo with the Royals.
- He's playing at Windsor this afternoon.
271
00:20:22,321 --> 00:20:24,789
(Grunts)
272
00:20:25,090 --> 00:20:28,548
- (Low bleeping)
- No.
273
00:20:28,594 --> 00:20:30,858
When I tried it earlier, nothing happened.
274
00:20:30,896 --> 00:20:33,797
It's obviously a computer fault in the laser.
275
00:20:33,832 --> 00:20:37,928
We're gonna have to phone the manufacturers
in Melbourne on Monday.
276
00:20:37,970 --> 00:20:40,029
I don't believe this.
277
00:20:40,072 --> 00:20:42,540
It's like the night
I went to the National Theatre.
278
00:20:42,574 --> 00:20:44,769
It was a play by Harold Pinter.
279
00:20:44,810 --> 00:20:47,608
The safety curtain rose on the second act
280
00:20:47,646 --> 00:20:52,413
and it jammed at the level
of Sir Ralph Richardson's knees.
281
00:20:52,451 --> 00:20:55,249
The solution to the problem lay in Canada.
282
00:20:55,287 --> 00:20:58,814
- Well, what happened?
- I never found out. They sent us home.
283
00:20:58,857 --> 00:21:03,089
Will you stop talking about Ralph Richardson's
knees? We'll have to smash this open.
284
00:21:03,128 --> 00:21:05,494
Well, you'll never do that, Lovejoy.
285
00:21:06,498 --> 00:21:10,867
The solution to this problem
lies in the Cayman Islands.
286
00:21:10,902 --> 00:21:12,267
What?
287
00:21:12,304 --> 00:21:16,741
Mirror, mirror, on the wall,
who's the cracksman who beats them all?
288
00:21:16,775 --> 00:21:18,766
(All) Barney Waddock!
289
00:21:19,278 --> 00:21:22,247
No way, Tink. I've retired, my son.
290
00:21:22,281 --> 00:21:26,149
- Don't need it no more. Who needs lasers?
- (Tinker) It's life and death.
291
00:21:26,184 --> 00:21:30,553
- (Line crackling)
- Can you... Can you hear me?
292
00:21:30,589 --> 00:21:32,250
Can you recommend someone?
293
00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:34,088
It's my boy you want.
294
00:21:34,126 --> 00:21:38,290
I passed all my knowledge on to him,
to make an honest lad of him.
295
00:21:38,330 --> 00:21:40,127
How can I reach him?
296
00:21:40,165 --> 00:21:42,861
It's Saturday morning, and we need him!
297
00:21:42,901 --> 00:21:47,031
It's Jonathan you want,
for a sophisticated assessment.
298
00:21:47,072 --> 00:21:51,270
I hear you. Have you got a number for him?
299
00:21:51,310 --> 00:21:53,244
Call the school.
300
00:21:53,278 --> 00:21:55,041
School? What school?
301
00:21:55,080 --> 00:21:56,570
Slough Grammar.
302
00:21:56,615 --> 00:22:00,517
- Slough what?
- Eton, my boy!
303
00:22:30,248 --> 00:22:32,842
- Jonathan Waddock!
- Yeah.
304
00:22:34,820 --> 00:22:38,017
- Major Dill.
- Yes, Tinker.
305
00:22:38,056 --> 00:22:40,456
My dad said you'd be hard to miss.
306
00:22:40,492 --> 00:22:43,154
- Come to take you to lunch, old bean.
- Oh, really?
307
00:22:43,195 --> 00:22:45,857
I thought it was a safe you wanted cracking.
308
00:22:45,897 --> 00:22:49,560
Alistair? I'm shogging off for an hour or two.
309
00:22:53,205 --> 00:22:56,766
My fee for this sort of thing,
by the way, is 50 quid an hour.
310
00:22:56,808 --> 00:22:58,833
Plus expenses.
311
00:23:04,149 --> 00:23:06,117
(Commentator)... straight down the ground.
312
00:23:06,151 --> 00:23:09,018
(Cheering)
313
00:23:09,054 --> 00:23:11,614
(Man) Yes!
314
00:23:11,656 --> 00:23:13,681
(Cheering)
315
00:23:13,725 --> 00:23:16,125
(Commentator) Alfredo Pereira... into the boards
316
00:23:16,161 --> 00:23:20,063
in front of the grandstand position.
They all gallop down on it.
317
00:23:20,098 --> 00:23:23,067
(Crowd shouting)
318
00:23:23,101 --> 00:23:24,693
(Commentator) He can't get ahold of it.
319
00:23:24,736 --> 00:23:28,137
They've taken it out to the center of the field.
320
00:23:28,173 --> 00:23:30,403
There's some hard riding going on.
321
00:23:30,442 --> 00:23:34,071
There's Tosh again.
Hits the ball down towards the goal.
322
00:23:34,112 --> 00:23:36,910
Tosh still on the ball.
Looks for the goal shot.
323
00:23:36,948 --> 00:23:39,143
I like it.
324
00:23:39,184 --> 00:23:44,178
Well, I've been back two days
and here I am sipping Pimm's
325
00:23:44,222 --> 00:23:46,281
with the polo set.
326
00:23:48,827 --> 00:23:51,694
I can't make an evaluation on this, Lovejoy.
327
00:23:51,730 --> 00:23:56,326
I'm not asking you to, Douglas.
I just want to know if you recognize it.
328
00:23:56,368 --> 00:23:58,802
Peruvian, you say?
329
00:23:58,837 --> 00:24:01,601
I think your first instinct was right.
It's trash.
330
00:24:01,640 --> 00:24:05,599
Mark you, one did go for $12,000
in New York the other day.
331
00:24:05,644 --> 00:24:10,274
What if that is King Atahualpa's mark?
332
00:24:10,315 --> 00:24:15,617
Then it could be just out of the Vilcarino
collection, and that would make it interesting.
333
00:24:15,654 --> 00:24:17,178
How interesting?
334
00:24:17,222 --> 00:24:19,156
Two million interesting.
335
00:24:19,191 --> 00:24:23,025
- Is that in Pereira's league?
- My dear Lovejoy, you don't know Pereira.
336
00:24:23,061 --> 00:24:25,859
No, I don't. Could you point him out?
337
00:24:26,865 --> 00:24:28,423
(Commentator)... up towards the goal.
338
00:24:28,467 --> 00:24:32,665
- Angus on the attack...
- (Clattering hooves drown out commentary)
339
00:24:32,704 --> 00:24:34,604
Alfredo Pereira takes it down the line.
340
00:24:34,639 --> 00:24:36,971
- (Cheering)
- There's a goal!
341
00:24:37,008 --> 00:24:40,375
- Perfect shot! That's won the game.
- (Applause)
342
00:24:40,412 --> 00:24:45,111
(Commentator) Wonderful play there
from Alfredo Pereira.
343
00:24:45,150 --> 00:24:48,210
Victory came right in the final second.
344
00:25:07,372 --> 00:25:12,935
If my interest is to be engaged,
then, Mr. Lovejoy,
345
00:25:12,978 --> 00:25:17,074
I should like to know something
of the ring's most recent history,
346
00:25:17,115 --> 00:25:21,449
like for example
how it comes to be in your possession.
347
00:25:21,486 --> 00:25:24,580
- Confidential, senhor.
- Hm.
348
00:25:24,623 --> 00:25:26,648
Does it concern a lady?
349
00:25:26,691 --> 00:25:30,286
(Chuckles) Oh, it always concerns a lady.
350
00:25:30,328 --> 00:25:34,389
- It does. It always has, in my experience.
- I wouldn't know that.
351
00:25:34,432 --> 00:25:36,366
To me it's just a piece of merchandise.
352
00:25:36,401 --> 00:25:40,838
For me it's not just a question of merchandise.
One can go into any shop for that.
353
00:25:40,872 --> 00:25:47,641
No, for me collecting is to be in touch
with personality, humanity
354
00:25:47,679 --> 00:25:51,012
and a little dash of intrigue.
355
00:25:51,049 --> 00:25:54,348
Adds spice, don't you think?
356
00:25:56,321 --> 00:26:03,420
Well, since I can't supply any of that,
maybe we should call it a day.
357
00:26:05,730 --> 00:26:07,721
So be it.
358
00:26:08,767 --> 00:26:11,235
Well...
359
00:26:11,269 --> 00:26:13,533
goodbye, gentlemen.
360
00:26:13,572 --> 00:26:15,802
Sen... senhor, excuse me!
361
00:26:15,840 --> 00:26:17,865
Senhor? Senhor?
362
00:26:17,909 --> 00:26:19,968
Monsieur? Sir?
363
00:26:20,011 --> 00:26:22,878
If I could arrange for you to see the ring...
364
00:26:22,914 --> 00:26:26,042
- That's what I thought we were here for, Mr...
- Rimmer.
365
00:26:26,084 --> 00:26:28,609
- Rimmer?
- Rimmer, yes. Yes.
366
00:26:31,256 --> 00:26:34,953
- (Whispers) He wants to see it.
- Course he wants to see it.
367
00:26:34,993 --> 00:26:38,827
- For God's sake, Lovejoy!
- Yeah, all right, all right.
368
00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:44,293
I'm sorry I made it a little hard for you, senhor,
369
00:26:44,336 --> 00:26:49,137
but I did make my client a solemn oath
to protect his privacy.
370
00:26:49,174 --> 00:26:51,506
Why? Is he a thief?
371
00:26:51,543 --> 00:26:53,408
Would it matter if he was?
372
00:26:53,445 --> 00:26:55,436
Aren't half the art collections of the world
373
00:26:55,480 --> 00:27:00,144
built on someone at some time
thieving something from somebody else?
374
00:27:00,185 --> 00:27:02,483
People even die for it.
375
00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:07,150
That is either very sophisticated
or a very cynical view.
376
00:27:07,192 --> 00:27:11,390
Not knowing you as a person,
Mr. Lovejoy, I cannot be sure which.
377
00:27:14,366 --> 00:27:18,530
I'd be very happy to show you the ring,
with Mr. Rimmer there to value it.
378
00:27:19,204 --> 00:27:25,040
Well, I have a full weekend.
I'm a guest at Windsor Castle, you know.
379
00:27:25,844 --> 00:27:28,335
Monday morning, ten o'clock?
380
00:27:28,380 --> 00:27:31,247
On Monday at 12 o'clock, I fly to Paris.
381
00:27:32,417 --> 00:27:36,376
- Eight, nine, before your flight?
- Eight o'clock.
382
00:27:36,421 --> 00:27:39,413
Yes. If you would care
to bring it to the Ritz hotel.
383
00:27:39,457 --> 00:27:43,223
- Yes, I think I could manage that.
- I can't, I've got an appointment at 9:30.
384
00:27:43,261 --> 00:27:46,788
It'll have to be my place.
Mr. Rimmer will keep you informed.
385
00:27:46,831 --> 00:27:50,631
- I'm not some wretched messenger...
- You are calling the shots, Mr. Lovejoy.
386
00:27:50,669 --> 00:27:53,536
I wait on Mr. Rimmer's instructions.
387
00:27:53,571 --> 00:27:56,699
How dare you?
I shall never do business with you again.
388
00:27:56,741 --> 00:28:00,507
Yes, you will, Douglas.
8:00am, Monday morning, my place.
389
00:28:00,545 --> 00:28:04,106
8:00am, Monday morning, your place.
390
00:28:05,817 --> 00:28:07,512
You got what you wanted, didn't you?
391
00:28:07,552 --> 00:28:11,044
- And the ring's safe, isn't it?
- Oh, yes, very safe.
392
00:28:11,089 --> 00:28:13,455
Then why so moody?
393
00:28:13,491 --> 00:28:17,450
Gut feeling, Janey.
He was just so conveniently there for it.
394
00:28:17,495 --> 00:28:20,191
And a meeting at Windsor polo grounds.
395
00:28:20,231 --> 00:28:22,859
And spending a weekend at the castle?
What's all that about?
396
00:28:22,901 --> 00:28:24,960
Probably showing off.
397
00:28:25,003 --> 00:28:29,372
(Lovejoy) Your husband.
He have any dealings with the Brazilians?
398
00:28:31,609 --> 00:28:34,942
He was investigating a small group
of Latin American bankers,
399
00:28:34,979 --> 00:28:37,948
a kind of international freemasonry.
400
00:28:37,982 --> 00:28:42,715
- I can't remember what they were called.
- Now, that's the smell I was after.
401
00:28:44,189 --> 00:28:47,955
Oh, Lovejoy. This is Barney's boy, Jonathan.
402
00:28:47,992 --> 00:28:51,086
- Hello, Jonathan. How you doing?
- Hi.
403
00:28:51,129 --> 00:28:55,031
I'm gonna have to use my brain
for the first time this half.
404
00:28:59,838 --> 00:29:04,002
This is costing us £50 an hour plus expenses.
405
00:29:04,042 --> 00:29:06,943
Is anyone going for a takeaway?
406
00:29:06,978 --> 00:29:08,969
Thai, for preference.
407
00:29:09,013 --> 00:29:12,210
- (Murmurs) Fish and chips.
- Right.
408
00:29:48,987 --> 00:29:51,455
Yeah, I'm just checking in, Janey.
409
00:29:51,489 --> 00:29:55,152
Bugger! I've forgotten the ensemble average.
410
00:29:55,193 --> 00:29:57,787
Say good night to Victoria for me. Sleep tight.
411
00:29:59,531 --> 00:30:01,965
(Chuckles) This is good fun.
412
00:30:04,269 --> 00:30:09,138
(Murmurs) You ever get the feeling
you're being "ripped orf"?
413
00:30:43,675 --> 00:30:46,803
(Buzzing)
414
00:30:49,347 --> 00:30:51,315
Oh, damn.
415
00:31:22,280 --> 00:31:24,680
- What seems to be the trouble?
- I haven't a clue.
416
00:31:24,716 --> 00:31:27,844
- Let me have a look.
- Thanks very much.
417
00:31:27,886 --> 00:31:29,683
(Muffled shrieks)
418
00:31:31,890 --> 00:31:34,324
That's it. Get her in the van.
419
00:31:34,359 --> 00:31:36,384
(Muffled cries)
420
00:32:12,897 --> 00:32:15,092
(Lovejoy) Wakey-wakey!
421
00:32:18,569 --> 00:32:22,164
- I'm supposed to be back for chapel at 10:40.
- (Phone)
422
00:32:22,206 --> 00:32:26,165
Don't worry, Jonathan,
we'll have you back for evensong.
423
00:32:26,210 --> 00:32:28,201
Yeah?
424
00:32:31,382 --> 00:32:32,679
Hello?
425
00:32:32,717 --> 00:32:35,185
They took the wrong woman!
It should have been me!
426
00:32:35,219 --> 00:32:38,017
They know you wouldn't
let anything happen to Jane.
427
00:32:38,056 --> 00:32:40,115
(Phone)
428
00:32:44,228 --> 00:32:46,822
Yeah? Yeah, Lovejoy. Who the hell are you?
429
00:32:46,864 --> 00:32:50,766
- Where is she?
- Yeah, you've got her.
430
00:32:50,802 --> 00:32:53,236
No police, agreed.
431
00:32:53,271 --> 00:32:55,262
No police?
432
00:32:55,306 --> 00:32:58,275
Straight swap - Janey for the ring.
433
00:32:58,309 --> 00:33:00,675
They're going to call back in a few hours,
let us know where and when.
434
00:33:00,712 --> 00:33:03,180
Well, give them the bloody ring.
435
00:33:04,248 --> 00:33:05,510
The ring.
436
00:33:05,550 --> 00:33:10,010
So a complete match gives a result of 1,
and no match gives a result of 0.
437
00:33:10,054 --> 00:33:14,423
You'll never get a complete match. So the safe
will open if the figure is greater than...
438
00:33:14,459 --> 00:33:18,395
- Will open?
...if the figure is greater than 0.98.
439
00:33:18,429 --> 00:33:22,388
- In theory.
- So open it, Eric.
440
00:33:22,433 --> 00:33:26,199
- (Low bleep)
- I can't do it. I can't do it.
441
00:33:26,237 --> 00:33:29,468
So why the hell
can't he open the safe, Jonathan?
442
00:33:29,507 --> 00:33:34,809
I don't know, do I? That's how it works,
that's all I know. I'm not bloody Einstein.
443
00:33:34,846 --> 00:33:37,542
Hey, hang on a tick.
444
00:33:37,582 --> 00:33:39,812
Do you wear contact lenses?
445
00:33:39,851 --> 00:33:43,412
- How do you know?
- Take them out.
446
00:33:43,454 --> 00:33:46,048
I've only just got 'em.
447
00:33:46,090 --> 00:33:48,183
Take them out, Eric.
448
00:33:56,901 --> 00:33:59,369
OK? Now shoot.
449
00:34:00,972 --> 00:34:03,236
(Device whistles)
450
00:34:03,274 --> 00:34:06,175
Now, that is a miracle.
451
00:34:06,210 --> 00:34:09,008
The contact lens
was altering the speckle pattern,
452
00:34:09,047 --> 00:34:12,710
making the correlation
much less than the threshold level.
453
00:34:12,750 --> 00:34:17,050
- So all this has been...
- A complete waste of time.
454
00:34:17,088 --> 00:34:21,457
- That'll be 500 quid.
- Eric'll pay you. Come on, Victoria.
455
00:34:23,261 --> 00:34:26,128
Cash? Or do you want to pay VAT?
456
00:34:26,864 --> 00:34:29,856
- (Keys rattle)
- (Horse whinnies)
457
00:34:29,901 --> 00:34:31,994
(Clanking)
458
00:34:32,036 --> 00:34:34,129
(Acoustic guitar music from TV)
459
00:34:40,511 --> 00:34:43,036
(Man speaking Portuguese)
460
00:34:50,388 --> 00:34:52,913
(Speaking Portuguese)
461
00:34:59,697 --> 00:35:01,426
(Horse grunts)
462
00:35:01,466 --> 00:35:03,900
(Whispers) That's a good boy.
463
00:35:15,546 --> 00:35:20,279
What I don't understand is that wealthy
educated people thought it was all right
464
00:35:20,318 --> 00:35:24,118
for a whole tribe
to be denied its basic rights.
465
00:35:24,155 --> 00:35:26,350
The reason was always the same,
466
00:35:26,390 --> 00:35:31,191
the Indians are too primitive
to take responsibility for themselves.
467
00:35:34,866 --> 00:35:36,800
There's an old Peruvian saying...
468
00:35:37,802 --> 00:35:42,296
nothing comes cheaper
than the skin of an Indian.
469
00:35:44,742 --> 00:35:46,733
And...
470
00:35:49,780 --> 00:35:52,305
was it as they say
471
00:35:52,350 --> 00:35:54,978
a fairy-tale marriage?
472
00:35:56,954 --> 00:35:59,889
Most of the time.
473
00:36:00,458 --> 00:36:01,982
Most?
474
00:36:03,661 --> 00:36:07,620
Women adored him, and he adored women.
475
00:36:07,665 --> 00:36:12,659
Very early on, I realized that I was
going to have to learn to share him.
476
00:36:12,703 --> 00:36:15,171
And that's how it was.
477
00:36:24,348 --> 00:36:26,009
(Birdsong)
478
00:36:33,090 --> 00:36:34,955
(Phone rings)
479
00:36:41,199 --> 00:36:43,190
Yeah?
480
00:36:43,234 --> 00:36:45,702
Where and when?
481
00:38:03,781 --> 00:38:05,476
Come on, let's go.
482
00:39:09,714 --> 00:39:14,981
The man who was speaking on the phone
sounded sort of Spanish.
483
00:39:15,019 --> 00:39:18,113
Well, can you remember a word? Any word?
484
00:39:18,155 --> 00:39:21,283
- Amiga.
- That's friend, female.
485
00:39:21,325 --> 00:39:26,228
- A... aviansa. Is that a word?
- It sounds like an airline.
486
00:39:26,263 --> 00:39:29,061
- Aliança?
- Yes, that's it.
487
00:39:29,100 --> 00:39:31,364
That's ring in Portuguese. Brazilian.
488
00:39:33,137 --> 00:39:34,604
(Footsteps)
489
00:39:34,638 --> 00:39:38,005
Oh, Alex! Darling, I've missed you!
490
00:39:38,943 --> 00:39:41,605
What the hell's going on here?
491
00:39:41,645 --> 00:39:43,442
Hello, Alex.
492
00:39:47,418 --> 00:39:50,046
(Snores gently)
493
00:39:55,626 --> 00:39:57,992
(Louder snoring)
494
00:40:01,532 --> 00:40:04,262
You didn't inform the police?
Jane could have been killed!
495
00:40:04,301 --> 00:40:08,294
- She may have been killed if I'd called them.
- Alex, it was my fault.
496
00:40:08,339 --> 00:40:13,038
Every time I come back, she's in some sort
of bloody problem with you, Lovejoy!
497
00:40:13,077 --> 00:40:16,513
- Maybe you shouldn't go away so often!
- I beg your pardon?
498
00:40:16,547 --> 00:40:21,416
- Look, stop it, both of you! Stop it!
- It's Pereira we should be concentrating on.
499
00:40:21,452 --> 00:40:24,046
- Pereira?
- Alfredo Pereira.
500
00:40:24,088 --> 00:40:27,922
- He's a leading international banker.
- Do you know him, Alex?
501
00:40:27,958 --> 00:40:30,119
He was involved in that World Bank Project
502
00:40:30,161 --> 00:40:32,891
for the development
of the South American Indians.
503
00:40:32,930 --> 00:40:34,921
Development? More like colonization.
504
00:40:34,965 --> 00:40:37,399
- It was a scandal.
- What else?
505
00:40:37,435 --> 00:40:40,927
He was a founder member of the International
Congress of Latin American Bankers.
506
00:40:40,971 --> 00:40:45,135
ICLAB. That's the one Jorge was investigating.
507
00:40:46,911 --> 00:40:50,142
And old Alfredo's due at my place in one hour.
508
00:40:50,181 --> 00:40:53,947
(Jane) But you both know the ring isn't there.
509
00:40:53,984 --> 00:40:55,815
I'll bluff it out.
510
00:40:55,853 --> 00:40:59,448
Look, I don't believe Pereira is involved
with this. I want to come with you.
511
00:40:59,490 --> 00:41:03,017
No, I want you to stay here.
Jane needs you. I need you.
512
00:41:03,060 --> 00:41:05,187
I want you to both stay by the phone.
513
00:41:07,731 --> 00:41:09,198
- Is she safe?
- Yeah, she's back home.
514
00:41:09,233 --> 00:41:10,962
- She's OK.
- Thank God for that.
515
00:41:11,001 --> 00:41:14,698
- Where are you going, Eric?
- We've got to take the safe back, Lovejoy.
516
00:41:14,738 --> 00:41:15,932
Not yet, you're not.
517
00:41:31,055 --> 00:41:35,287
- This is preposterous.
- Isn't it, Douglas?
518
00:41:35,326 --> 00:41:36,918
Come inside, senhor.
519
00:41:36,961 --> 00:41:39,429
It's... charming here.
520
00:41:50,674 --> 00:41:55,543
I don't believe you've met.
Victoria Cavero, Alfredo Pereira.
521
00:41:55,579 --> 00:41:58,275
- Senora.
- Senhor.
522
00:41:59,850 --> 00:42:03,445
- Coffee, senhor?
- Thank you, er, no coffee.
523
00:42:03,487 --> 00:42:05,079
It's Brazilian.
524
00:42:05,122 --> 00:42:07,147
These are colleagues of mine.
525
00:42:07,191 --> 00:42:11,560
But shouldn't this be... confidential?
526
00:42:12,563 --> 00:42:14,463
If you wish.
527
00:42:14,498 --> 00:42:18,935
Mr. Catchpole, you're security.
Would you mind going outside and securing?
528
00:42:18,969 --> 00:42:21,369
Thank you, Mr. Catchpole.
529
00:42:22,673 --> 00:42:26,769
- And the senora?
- Oh, didn't I tell you?
530
00:42:28,646 --> 00:42:32,946
- Senora Cavero is the owner of the ring.
- Ah, forgive me, senora.
531
00:42:35,319 --> 00:42:39,688
I'll go through the procedures.
I open the safe. You view the merchandise.
532
00:42:39,723 --> 00:42:44,854
Mr. Rimmer pronounces.
We haggle and come to our conclusions.
533
00:42:45,429 --> 00:42:47,420
I agree to that.
534
00:42:48,232 --> 00:42:49,824
Ah.
535
00:42:52,369 --> 00:42:54,360
Mr. Catchpole...
536
00:42:55,139 --> 00:42:58,472
- Make your mind up, Lovejoy.
- Mr. Lovejoy. Open the safe.
537
00:42:58,509 --> 00:43:00,636
Yeah, but the...
538
00:43:02,780 --> 00:43:07,547
- It's a prototype. Very few on the market.
- I know. I, er... I have several.
539
00:43:07,585 --> 00:43:09,610
They're very good.
540
00:43:11,655 --> 00:43:13,623
(Device whistles)
541
00:43:18,929 --> 00:43:21,420
Now look here, Lovejoy,
is this one of your jokes?
542
00:43:21,465 --> 00:43:24,593
Mr. Catchpole,
escort Mr. Rimmer outside, please.
543
00:43:24,635 --> 00:43:27,331
- But...
- This is none of your concern, Douglas.
544
00:43:27,371 --> 00:43:30,306
- I can walk on my own.
- Just...
545
00:43:44,955 --> 00:43:47,651
Would you like some breakfast, senhor?
Help yourself.
546
00:43:48,959 --> 00:43:50,950
What are you playing at?
547
00:43:52,429 --> 00:43:56,729
You knew the ring wasn't there. You've already
taken possession of it earlier this morning.
548
00:43:56,767 --> 00:44:01,466
That's all right if it's your way of doing
business, but you haven't paid for it.
549
00:44:02,573 --> 00:44:05,872
I... I am sorry, I, er...
550
00:44:05,909 --> 00:44:07,934
I don't understand.
551
00:44:07,978 --> 00:44:11,277
The price for what you already have
is three million dollars.
552
00:44:11,315 --> 00:44:15,115
- We want settlement now.
- Preposterous.
553
00:44:15,152 --> 00:44:19,054
As Mr. Rimmer would say.
Shall I call him in, and we'll make it public?
554
00:44:20,891 --> 00:44:24,418
Your... allegation
555
00:44:24,461 --> 00:44:27,225
that I have this ring already, hm?
556
00:44:27,264 --> 00:44:29,755
- Based on?
- A word.
557
00:44:29,800 --> 00:44:32,132
Aliança.
558
00:44:32,169 --> 00:44:34,262
That's Brazilian for ring.
559
00:44:34,304 --> 00:44:37,740
- In Peru, it would have been...
- Anillo.
560
00:44:40,511 --> 00:44:44,140
Your man in the horse box on the telephone.
561
00:44:44,181 --> 00:44:46,240
(Latin accent) A little bit careless.
562
00:44:46,283 --> 00:44:48,808
My man at the horse box?
563
00:44:48,852 --> 00:44:54,654
Huh! If it were not all so absurd,
I should be getting angry with you.
564
00:44:54,692 --> 00:44:57,559
You accuse me now of what precisely?
565
00:44:57,594 --> 00:45:00,688
Kidnap. Death threats.
566
00:45:00,731 --> 00:45:02,665
(Sighs)
567
00:45:02,700 --> 00:45:04,861
Mr. Lovejoy.
568
00:45:04,902 --> 00:45:08,338
I am here,
keeping an appointment in good faith.
569
00:45:08,372 --> 00:45:12,706
You have brought me on a wild-goose chase.
It appears you have no merchandise.
570
00:45:12,743 --> 00:45:16,474
And now, if you will excuse me,
I have a plane to catch.
571
00:45:16,513 --> 00:45:20,472
Senora Cavero has a schoolfriend.
They were at Benenden together.
572
00:45:20,517 --> 00:45:25,682
A certain Royal lady.
You probably know her. She likes horses too.
573
00:45:25,723 --> 00:45:29,124
She's going to phone her now,
and tell her about our meeting at Windsor
574
00:45:29,159 --> 00:45:33,562
and the violence that you inflicted
on their very good friend Jane Felsham,
575
00:45:33,597 --> 00:45:36,532
Lady Jane Felsham.
576
00:45:39,837 --> 00:45:42,305
This phone call is our marker
577
00:45:42,339 --> 00:45:46,207
- for 3.5 million.
- 3.5?
578
00:45:46,243 --> 00:45:49,974
It just went up. When you kidnapped
Lady Felsham, you picked the wrong woman.
579
00:45:53,217 --> 00:45:55,879
Make your call.
580
00:45:59,423 --> 00:46:01,983
- Does she know the number?
- Shh.
581
00:46:04,228 --> 00:46:06,389
Hello, this is Senora Cavero.
582
00:46:06,430 --> 00:46:11,094
I wonder if I could speak
to Her Royal Highness's equerry, please.
583
00:46:11,135 --> 00:46:13,899
Hello, who am I speaking to?
584
00:46:13,937 --> 00:46:16,906
Is that the residence of Her Royal Highness?
585
00:46:16,940 --> 00:46:21,206
(Jane) It isn't permitted for me
to answer that. Who are you?
586
00:46:28,018 --> 00:46:30,543
Hello? Yes, I'm afraid we had a crossed line.
587
00:46:30,587 --> 00:46:33,522
This is Victoria Cavero.
588
00:46:33,557 --> 00:46:38,358
No, please don't disturb her. Will you tell her
that I'm in England and I'd love to see her?
589
00:46:38,395 --> 00:46:40,863
Yes. Thank you.
590
00:46:42,099 --> 00:46:43,430
Phew!
591
00:46:47,604 --> 00:46:50,937
Before we go any further...
592
00:46:50,974 --> 00:46:54,774
I think you owe me the courtesy
of telling me who I'm dealing with.
593
00:46:54,812 --> 00:46:58,612
Are your interests political, hm?
Or purely mercenary?
594
00:46:59,483 --> 00:47:02,179
In South America, is there any distinction?
595
00:47:02,219 --> 00:47:04,949
Now, that is insulting.
596
00:47:04,988 --> 00:47:08,924
We're talking about Indians,
in your country and in mine.
597
00:47:08,959 --> 00:47:12,895
I know of the problems in your country,
senora, and of your concern for them.
598
00:47:12,930 --> 00:47:17,958
But you, Mr. Lovejoy, I see as someone
merely out for what you can get.
599
00:47:18,001 --> 00:47:21,232
So don't take the high moral ground with me.
600
00:47:22,673 --> 00:47:27,975
I... am sorry if I have offended you, senora.
601
00:47:28,011 --> 00:47:31,947
To put the matter right
and to assure you of my goodwill,
602
00:47:31,982 --> 00:47:38,785
I am prepared to make
a contribution to your cause.
603
00:47:38,822 --> 00:47:43,555
Whatever you call it, Pereira,
it's still 3.5 million.
604
00:47:43,594 --> 00:47:47,052
You wanted the ring, you got it.
Now you pay for it.
605
00:47:47,097 --> 00:47:50,533
Oh, the ring may be worthless.
606
00:47:50,567 --> 00:47:53,968
Oh, do me a favor.
607
00:47:54,004 --> 00:47:57,269
I am not prepared to go beyond a million.
608
00:47:57,307 --> 00:48:00,674
- 3.5.
- 1.5.
609
00:48:00,711 --> 00:48:03,703
3.5, and you get to keep your reputation intact
610
00:48:03,747 --> 00:48:08,616
and you can still play your little games
with your friends in Windsor.
611
00:48:08,652 --> 00:48:11,951
We both know what I'm selling,
Pereira, and what you're buying,
612
00:48:11,989 --> 00:48:14,856
and it's not the ring.
613
00:48:18,128 --> 00:48:20,358
Two million, my limit.
614
00:48:20,397 --> 00:48:22,331
Cash check.
615
00:48:22,366 --> 00:48:23,731
Now.
616
00:48:35,913 --> 00:48:38,643
A word of advice, senora.
617
00:48:38,682 --> 00:48:41,242
Don't go back to Peru.
618
00:48:42,219 --> 00:48:44,813
(Lovejoy) Adiós, amigo.
619
00:48:52,396 --> 00:48:54,887
- Now look here, Lovejoy...
- The deal's done, Douglas.
620
00:48:54,932 --> 00:48:58,333
- Without the ring? How?
- Sort of a miracle.
621
00:48:58,368 --> 00:49:02,236
- But what about my commission?
- Make sure he doesn't stop the check.
622
00:49:02,272 --> 00:49:06,231
- Go on, Douglas, you'll miss your ride.
- Wait!
623
00:49:11,615 --> 00:49:14,311
- Just one small point, though.
- Hm?
624
00:49:14,351 --> 00:49:17,718
You asked 3 million for me, 3.5 for Janey?
625
00:49:17,754 --> 00:49:21,781
I've known Janey longer.
Anyway, 3 million was a bit ambitious.
626
00:49:21,825 --> 00:49:25,921
Two million for your campesinos, senora.
627
00:49:25,963 --> 00:49:30,127
Thank you. Oh, Lovejoy, I think
I should tell you in case it rebounds on you,
628
00:49:30,167 --> 00:49:35,366
this Royal I'm supposed to be so friendly with,
I left the term before she arrived.
629
00:49:35,405 --> 00:49:37,305
- Really?
- I never even met her.
630
00:49:37,341 --> 00:49:39,639
(Lovejoy) Really.
631
00:49:40,177 --> 00:49:44,204
Well, all that remains is for us
to discuss my commission.
632
00:49:44,247 --> 00:49:46,545
- Shall we talk over dinner?
- Dinner?
633
00:49:46,583 --> 00:49:49,245
Oh, great, I'm starvin'.51463
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