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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,493 --> 00:00:04,498 [THE ANDREWS SISTERS' "ANY BONDS TODAY"] 2 00:00:04,523 --> 00:00:06,396 ♪ ♪ 3 00:00:06,421 --> 00:00:08,422 ♪ Any bonds today ♪ 4 00:00:09,155 --> 00:00:11,523 ♪ The bonds of freedom that's what I'm selling ♪ 5 00:00:11,524 --> 00:00:13,515 ♪ Any bonds today ♪ 6 00:00:14,187 --> 00:00:16,311 ♪ Scrape up the most you can ♪ 7 00:00:16,534 --> 00:00:18,452 ♪ Here comes the freedom man ♪ 8 00:00:18,453 --> 00:00:22,390 ♪ Asking you to buy a share of freedom today ♪ 9 00:00:23,632 --> 00:00:25,466 ♪ Any stamps today ♪ 10 00:00:25,467 --> 00:00:28,699 - [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] - ♪ We'll be blessed if we all invest ♪ 11 00:00:28,724 --> 00:00:31,154 ♪ In the U.S.A. ♪ 12 00:00:31,396 --> 00:00:33,529 ♪ Here comes the freedom man ♪ 13 00:00:33,859 --> 00:00:35,724 ♪ Can't make tomorrow's plan ♪ 14 00:00:35,749 --> 00:00:38,499 ♪ Not unless you buy a share of freedom ♪ 15 00:00:38,524 --> 00:00:41,153 Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie www.addic7ed.com 16 00:00:41,332 --> 00:00:42,710 ♪ ♪ 17 00:00:42,711 --> 00:00:44,428 - [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] - MAN: Whoo! 18 00:00:44,453 --> 00:00:46,195 [INDISTINCT CHATTER] 19 00:00:46,230 --> 00:00:48,422 ♪ The tall man with the high hat ♪ 20 00:00:48,447 --> 00:00:50,809 ♪ And the whiskers on his chin ♪ 21 00:00:50,810 --> 00:00:53,606 ♪ Will soon be knocking at your door ♪ 22 00:00:53,607 --> 00:00:58,036 [HORN HONKING] 23 00:00:59,141 --> 00:01:00,653 Who's Major Major? 24 00:01:05,825 --> 00:01:07,739 Well, we need you for the group leaders meeting. 25 00:01:08,140 --> 00:01:09,638 We're allocating the Requisitions Budget 26 00:01:09,663 --> 00:01:10,817 for next quarter. Let's go. 27 00:01:14,106 --> 00:01:17,151 Uh, I... I'm sorry, and my part in that is? 28 00:01:17,176 --> 00:01:19,533 All members of Senior Command are automatically part 29 00:01:19,534 --> 00:01:21,537 of the Group Leaders' Allocation and Requisition 30 00:01:21,538 --> 00:01:25,252 Procedural Advisory Board. GLARPAB. 31 00:01:25,416 --> 00:01:26,416 GLARPAB? 32 00:01:26,752 --> 00:01:28,541 For God's sakes, we're late for the meeting. 33 00:01:29,447 --> 00:01:31,885 Oh, with all due respect, sir, I'm a sergeant. 34 00:01:33,053 --> 00:01:35,170 - You're a sergeant? - MAJOR: Yes, sir. I'm only a sergeant. 35 00:01:36,317 --> 00:01:37,903 - But you're Major Major. - Yes, sir. 36 00:01:37,904 --> 00:01:38,959 That's my name, sir. Uh... 37 00:01:39,264 --> 00:01:40,342 [LAUGHS] 38 00:01:40,763 --> 00:01:42,161 I've been through this with the fellas, sir. 39 00:01:42,162 --> 00:01:45,167 Uh, it's my birth name. It's a funny story. 40 00:01:45,168 --> 00:01:46,671 Um, but now may not be the time. 41 00:01:46,672 --> 00:01:48,800 So, yes, in short, I'm Sergeant Major Major. 42 00:01:48,801 --> 00:01:50,720 Major Major is my name. Sergeant is my rank. 43 00:01:50,745 --> 00:01:53,416 He's already on the calendar sheets right up to September. 44 00:01:53,510 --> 00:01:54,512 List... 45 00:01:56,025 --> 00:01:57,361 Good Christ, that means he's also in the... 46 00:01:57,386 --> 00:01:58,386 Yes, sir. 47 00:01:58,411 --> 00:02:01,243 He's already down for Wednesday's subcommittee briefings, yes. 48 00:02:02,610 --> 00:02:03,610 CATHCART: Sergeant. 49 00:02:04,525 --> 00:02:07,617 Major... Sergeant... Whatever your goddamn name is, 50 00:02:07,642 --> 00:02:08,945 you're not making a whiff of sense to me. 51 00:02:08,970 --> 00:02:10,594 MAJOR: Sir, uh, like I told the fellas, 52 00:02:10,595 --> 00:02:13,348 well, uh, my father was something of a practical joker. 53 00:02:13,349 --> 00:02:14,767 He named me Major Major. 54 00:02:14,792 --> 00:02:16,915 First name Major, middle name Major, 55 00:02:16,940 --> 00:02:19,907 behind my mother's back, uh, on the birth certificate. 56 00:02:20,472 --> 00:02:23,157 Uh, and my surname's Major, too, as you already know. 57 00:02:25,790 --> 00:02:28,133 Well, that is a hell of a practical joke, isn't it, son? 58 00:02:29,091 --> 00:02:30,977 He was a piece of work, sir. 59 00:02:34,641 --> 00:02:35,644 What are we gonna do? 60 00:02:35,645 --> 00:02:37,731 We can't have a goddamn sergeant in GLARPAB. 61 00:02:37,965 --> 00:02:40,411 That's correct, sir. It's for Senior Command only. 62 00:02:43,516 --> 00:02:46,560 Unless, sir, you promote him. 63 00:02:50,208 --> 00:02:51,716 CATHCART: Sergeant Major, step forward. 64 00:02:54,614 --> 00:02:56,894 Sergeant Major, congratulations. 65 00:02:56,895 --> 00:02:58,898 I'm herby promoting you to Major. 66 00:02:59,349 --> 00:03:01,474 Congratulations. Get in. 67 00:03:02,005 --> 00:03:04,011 - MAJOR: But, no, sir... sir, I... - CATHCART: You're a good man. 68 00:03:04,012 --> 00:03:05,286 You've earned it. You've worked hard. 69 00:03:05,846 --> 00:03:07,608 Yes, sir. Um, d-does that mean, uh... 70 00:03:07,633 --> 00:03:09,563 what... will my duties be any different? 71 00:03:09,588 --> 00:03:10,911 Will his duties be any different, Colonel Korn? 72 00:03:10,936 --> 00:03:12,245 - Of course, sir. He's a major, sir. - Of course, they are, 73 00:03:12,270 --> 00:03:13,278 you're a major. 74 00:03:13,303 --> 00:03:14,984 We don't just hand out promotions willy-nilly. 75 00:03:15,009 --> 00:03:16,243 You'll act like a major, 76 00:03:16,268 --> 00:03:18,118 you'll perform the duties of a major, God damn it. 77 00:03:18,143 --> 00:03:19,397 Yes, sir. And... And those are? 78 00:03:19,398 --> 00:03:21,869 Major Major, congratulations. You're a major. 79 00:03:21,870 --> 00:03:22,905 Give him the goddamn thing. 80 00:03:22,906 --> 00:03:24,449 These are the minutes from last Allocations 81 00:03:24,450 --> 00:03:26,787 and Requisitions meeting and the agenda for today. 82 00:03:27,077 --> 00:03:28,077 Uh... 83 00:03:29,794 --> 00:03:31,881 [CAR ENGINE REVVING] 84 00:03:31,882 --> 00:03:33,342 CATHCART: Don't just stand there! 85 00:03:33,343 --> 00:03:34,695 Get in the goddamn jeep. 86 00:03:35,686 --> 00:03:37,513 [JOHNNY HODGES' "THINGS AIN'T WHAT THEY USED TO BE"] 87 00:03:37,538 --> 00:03:38,819 Mary, and Joseph. 88 00:03:38,844 --> 00:03:42,250 ♪ ♪ 89 00:03:52,789 --> 00:03:53,789 Hey, fellas! 90 00:03:53,814 --> 00:03:57,499 ♪ ♪ 91 00:04:14,570 --> 00:04:17,523 Okay. These go inside. 92 00:04:17,744 --> 00:04:20,832 You carry two at a time. Like this. 93 00:04:21,036 --> 00:04:22,265 Carry, carry. 94 00:04:23,803 --> 00:04:25,138 Rapido, rapido! 95 00:04:25,445 --> 00:04:27,523 Good lads. Bueno, bueno. 96 00:04:27,900 --> 00:04:28,984 SCHULZ: What's going on? 97 00:04:29,079 --> 00:04:31,031 Oh, you like watermelons? 98 00:04:31,362 --> 00:04:32,516 What is this? 99 00:04:32,954 --> 00:04:34,821 - They didn't tell you? - Tell me what? 100 00:04:35,026 --> 00:04:37,883 Oh, I am so sorry about that. 101 00:04:38,014 --> 00:04:39,641 I'm the mess officer now. 102 00:04:39,885 --> 00:04:41,969 SCHULZ: [CHUCKLES] What are you talking about? 103 00:04:41,994 --> 00:04:46,893 MILO: Uh, I am the mess officer now. 104 00:04:47,643 --> 00:04:50,268 And, uh, you're not. 105 00:04:51,849 --> 00:04:53,871 - But this is what I do. - MILO: I know. 106 00:04:53,896 --> 00:04:56,341 I tried to tell them that myself, it's ridiculous. 107 00:04:56,505 --> 00:04:58,560 What the hell do I know about running a kitchen? 108 00:04:59,623 --> 00:05:02,412 No, no. Those go in the pantry. 109 00:05:02,437 --> 00:05:05,442 [JOHNNY HODGES' "THINGS AIN'T WHAT THEY USED TO BE"] 110 00:05:05,443 --> 00:05:09,312 ♪ ♪ 111 00:05:11,665 --> 00:05:14,429 At 0930, sir, Major Predegast from the Car Relative 112 00:05:14,454 --> 00:05:16,089 Operations Southern Division Committee 113 00:05:16,090 --> 00:05:17,843 will be here to speak to you about the combined groups' 114 00:05:17,844 --> 00:05:19,157 requisition outreach. 115 00:05:19,524 --> 00:05:21,469 At 1000, that'll be Colonel Lestridge. 116 00:05:22,110 --> 00:05:24,606 Okay, 1100, a Milo Minderbinder 117 00:05:24,607 --> 00:05:26,625 has asked to see you. He's the mess officer. 118 00:05:26,736 --> 00:05:28,739 He wants to talk to you about an unusual new variety 119 00:05:28,740 --> 00:05:30,079 of truffles, sir. 120 00:05:30,368 --> 00:05:32,165 Apparently they're worth a lot of money. 121 00:05:35,588 --> 00:05:36,588 Okay. 122 00:05:44,775 --> 00:05:47,814 What would you say if I told you I don't want to see those people? 123 00:05:48,172 --> 00:05:49,595 Which people in particular, sir? 124 00:05:49,829 --> 00:05:51,493 All of them. Any of them. 125 00:05:51,893 --> 00:05:53,812 SERGEANT: Well, sir, my job is to schedule your day 126 00:05:53,837 --> 00:05:54,860 as you request. 127 00:05:56,522 --> 00:06:02,073 Okay, uh, from now on, I would much prefer if no one 128 00:06:02,098 --> 00:06:04,251 came in to see me while I'm here. 129 00:06:04,821 --> 00:06:07,071 Yes. Does that include me, sir? 130 00:06:07,719 --> 00:06:09,235 MAJOR: Yes, that includes you, sergeant. 131 00:06:09,536 --> 00:06:10,536 Of course, sir. 132 00:06:11,348 --> 00:06:13,168 That's no one ever. 133 00:06:13,454 --> 00:06:14,903 SERGEANT: I see, sir. Very good, sir. 134 00:06:15,379 --> 00:06:16,668 Will that be all, sir? 135 00:06:17,801 --> 00:06:18,801 Yes. 136 00:06:19,174 --> 00:06:20,738 [LAUGHING] 137 00:06:20,910 --> 00:06:22,479 Uh, yes, yes. That will be all. 138 00:06:22,504 --> 00:06:23,888 [CHUCKLES] 139 00:06:23,913 --> 00:06:25,114 What shall I say to the people who do 140 00:06:25,139 --> 00:06:26,423 come to see you while you're here? 141 00:06:26,540 --> 00:06:27,917 MAJOR: Tell them, uh... 142 00:06:27,942 --> 00:06:29,653 tell them I'm in and ask them to wait. 143 00:06:29,678 --> 00:06:31,013 Yes, sir. For how long? 144 00:06:31,138 --> 00:06:32,255 Until I've left. 145 00:06:32,910 --> 00:06:34,621 SERGEANT: What shall I do with them then, sir? 146 00:06:34,810 --> 00:06:36,794 Uh, you know what? I don't care. 147 00:06:37,466 --> 00:06:39,083 SERGEANT: May I send them in to see you after you've left? 148 00:06:39,599 --> 00:06:40,915 Yes. Yes, you may. You may indeed. 149 00:06:40,940 --> 00:06:42,958 - But you won't be here then, will you? - MAJOR: Yes, that's correct. 150 00:06:43,126 --> 00:06:45,159 Well, sir, just to clarify, when should I come here 151 00:06:45,184 --> 00:06:46,907 to find out if there's anything you want me to do for you? 152 00:06:46,932 --> 00:06:48,064 When I'm not here. 153 00:06:48,065 --> 00:06:49,291 SERGEANT: Yes, and what should I do? 154 00:06:49,447 --> 00:06:50,820 Uh, whatever I tell you to. 155 00:06:50,821 --> 00:06:51,989 SERGEANT: But you won't be here to tell me. 156 00:06:52,185 --> 00:06:53,185 No. 157 00:06:53,210 --> 00:06:54,253 SERGEANT: Then what should I do? 158 00:06:54,286 --> 00:06:57,012 Whatever has to be done. Cross that bridge when we come to it. 159 00:06:57,936 --> 00:06:58,936 Yes, sir. 160 00:06:59,379 --> 00:07:00,379 MAJOR: Good. 161 00:07:01,760 --> 00:07:04,731 Well, dismissed, then. 162 00:07:09,648 --> 00:07:10,775 [DOOR CLICKS SHUT] 163 00:07:19,419 --> 00:07:20,786 CHAPLAIN: The Lord is my shepherd. 164 00:07:21,256 --> 00:07:22,473 I shall not want. 165 00:07:23,637 --> 00:07:26,390 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures. 166 00:07:26,391 --> 00:07:29,012 He leadeth me beside still waters. 167 00:07:29,809 --> 00:07:31,871 He restoreth my soul. 168 00:07:32,278 --> 00:07:34,528 He leadeth me in paths of righteousness 169 00:07:34,700 --> 00:07:36,067 for his name's sake. 170 00:07:36,495 --> 00:07:38,081 Yea, though I walk through the valley 171 00:07:38,082 --> 00:07:40,362 of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil. 172 00:07:40,387 --> 00:07:41,880 Look, enough with all the death stuff, huh? 173 00:07:41,881 --> 00:07:43,801 What do you say we send the boys out feeling good? 174 00:07:43,802 --> 00:07:47,004 Don't you have something a little bit more, I dunno, 175 00:07:47,601 --> 00:07:48,812 goddamn sunnier? 176 00:07:52,822 --> 00:07:54,090 Sunnier. 177 00:07:56,744 --> 00:07:59,098 May the road rise to meet you. 178 00:07:59,810 --> 00:08:01,786 May the wind be always at your back. 179 00:08:02,739 --> 00:08:05,067 The sun shine warm upon your face. 180 00:08:05,971 --> 00:08:08,239 The rains fall soft upon your fields. 181 00:08:09,215 --> 00:08:10,528 And until we meet again, 182 00:08:10,653 --> 00:08:12,606 may God hold you in the palm of His hand. 183 00:08:12,793 --> 00:08:13,973 [LOUD BOOMING] 184 00:08:13,998 --> 00:08:17,129 MAN: Closing in on target. 30 seconds to run. 185 00:08:17,154 --> 00:08:18,822 [PLANE ENGINES RUMBLING] 186 00:08:19,265 --> 00:08:21,603 Crew, you still fucking alive back there? 187 00:08:21,628 --> 00:08:25,509 [DRAMATIC MUSIC] 188 00:08:25,510 --> 00:08:27,304 MAN: Yossarian, you on a steady heading? 189 00:08:27,305 --> 00:08:28,389 We're approaching. 190 00:08:28,390 --> 00:08:29,517 YOSSARIAN: Steady. 191 00:08:29,518 --> 00:08:32,022 ♪ ♪ 192 00:08:32,023 --> 00:08:33,191 [MOTORS RUNNING] 193 00:08:33,192 --> 00:08:37,364 ♪ ♪ 194 00:08:39,953 --> 00:08:41,325 Bombs away. 195 00:08:42,175 --> 00:08:44,805 Okay, over to you, McWatt. get us out of here. 196 00:08:44,924 --> 00:08:49,558 ♪ ♪ 197 00:08:49,559 --> 00:08:52,564 [BOOMING] 198 00:08:52,565 --> 00:08:56,973 ♪ ♪ 199 00:09:06,750 --> 00:09:09,337 [TIRES SQUEALING] 200 00:09:10,142 --> 00:09:15,114 ♪ ♪ 201 00:09:18,793 --> 00:09:20,661 CATHCART: We have pounded the bastards into submission 202 00:09:20,662 --> 00:09:21,934 and we have taken Rome. 203 00:09:22,457 --> 00:09:24,254 Congratulations, gentlemen. 204 00:09:24,911 --> 00:09:27,200 St. Lawrence Basilica, rubble. 205 00:09:28,223 --> 00:09:30,825 This one, good job. 206 00:09:31,536 --> 00:09:34,723 This, bravo. Bravo, gentlemen. 207 00:09:35,543 --> 00:09:36,543 What is this? 208 00:09:37,649 --> 00:09:38,856 The hell is this? 209 00:09:40,098 --> 00:09:42,098 What in the goddamn hell is this? 210 00:09:44,497 --> 00:09:47,114 That looks like a goddamn tourist postcard! 211 00:09:48,224 --> 00:09:49,856 Hands up, bombardiers. 212 00:09:52,455 --> 00:09:53,895 Well, there you have it. 213 00:09:55,200 --> 00:09:57,275 A group of idiots trying to singlehandedly 214 00:09:57,276 --> 00:09:59,321 lose this fucking war for us. 215 00:09:59,322 --> 00:10:01,576 Next time why don't we just drop leaflets? 216 00:10:01,577 --> 00:10:03,305 Guten Tag, my German friends. 217 00:10:03,506 --> 00:10:06,162 You just have a fine old fucking day, why don't you? 218 00:10:06,783 --> 00:10:07,783 What are we trying to be? 219 00:10:08,090 --> 00:10:10,577 What have I told you that we are trying to be? 220 00:10:10,944 --> 00:10:13,266 Comprehensive. Blanket coverage. 221 00:10:13,267 --> 00:10:16,188 Flush the enemy out. How many times have I told you? 222 00:10:16,189 --> 00:10:17,315 How many times... 223 00:10:17,316 --> 00:10:18,509 That's the Vatican, sir. 224 00:10:25,519 --> 00:10:27,214 All right, then. That's Vatican City. 225 00:10:27,378 --> 00:10:30,451 And as we all know, that is neutral territory, so good job. 226 00:10:30,452 --> 00:10:32,229 That is precision bombing, gentlemen. 227 00:10:32,579 --> 00:10:34,565 You gotta respect that neutral territory. 228 00:10:35,173 --> 00:10:36,173 Terrific job. 229 00:10:37,932 --> 00:10:39,476 Gotta love those Catholics, huh? 230 00:10:41,625 --> 00:10:42,627 And the Jews. 231 00:10:45,222 --> 00:10:46,589 Major de Coverley. 232 00:10:47,464 --> 00:10:50,259 Major de Coverley will be heading to Rome to spearhead 233 00:10:50,284 --> 00:10:52,714 his Advance Reconnaissance Residential Plan. 234 00:10:52,822 --> 00:10:56,361 And, as usual, securing accommodations for the officers 235 00:10:56,386 --> 00:10:59,120 in the performing of their administrative duties. 236 00:10:59,442 --> 00:11:01,925 As well as their weekend leave, of course. 237 00:11:02,382 --> 00:11:05,308 Major de Coverley, we look forward as always to your... 238 00:11:05,516 --> 00:11:07,206 splendid accommodations. 239 00:11:07,558 --> 00:11:10,074 That's if I can find any still standing in there. 240 00:11:10,297 --> 00:11:13,886 [LAUGHTER] 241 00:11:14,545 --> 00:11:16,006 I'm sure you will. 242 00:11:21,863 --> 00:11:23,616 Gosh, I'm proud of you, gentlemen. 243 00:11:25,899 --> 00:11:28,060 I'm very proud indeed. 244 00:11:30,701 --> 00:11:32,506 So what do you say we speed this thing up, hmm? 245 00:11:34,220 --> 00:11:36,365 Are you with me? All right, then. 246 00:11:36,810 --> 00:11:38,520 Let's get this thing over and done with. 247 00:11:38,521 --> 00:11:41,108 Let's put the hurt on Jerry. Let's pitch in. 248 00:11:41,109 --> 00:11:43,154 Let's raise the mission count to 35. 249 00:11:43,155 --> 00:11:46,243 35 it is, gentlemen. We're gonna win this thing. 250 00:11:46,244 --> 00:11:48,080 We're gonna win this fucking thing. 251 00:11:48,299 --> 00:11:49,463 35 it is. 252 00:11:50,002 --> 00:11:52,798 [QUIRKY MUSIC] 253 00:11:52,799 --> 00:11:54,510 - You can't go in there, sir. - Yes, I can. 254 00:11:54,511 --> 00:11:55,556 He's my point guard. 255 00:11:56,322 --> 00:11:57,618 He's raising the missions again. 256 00:11:57,643 --> 00:11:59,812 He's raising the goddamn missions again. 257 00:12:00,056 --> 00:12:01,273 MAJOR: He's awfully keen. 258 00:12:01,274 --> 00:12:03,779 No, he's not keen. He's crazy! 259 00:12:03,780 --> 00:12:05,908 - I have no power. - YOSSARIAN: Yes, you do. 260 00:12:05,909 --> 00:12:07,870 You have the power to stand men down. 261 00:12:07,871 --> 00:12:10,041 - MAJOR: On what basis? - Find a basis. 262 00:12:10,042 --> 00:12:12,212 Good God, there are basises everywhere. 263 00:12:12,213 --> 00:12:14,007 Yossarian, I don't even want to be here. 264 00:12:14,008 --> 00:12:15,390 I'm two missions away. 265 00:12:15,415 --> 00:12:17,532 And, bang, 35, just like that. 266 00:12:17,557 --> 00:12:19,483 And just like that, I'm 7 away. 267 00:12:19,508 --> 00:12:20,646 That's terrible. 268 00:12:20,647 --> 00:12:22,648 Yossarian, that's simply terrible. 269 00:12:23,689 --> 00:12:24,689 I'm afraid. 270 00:12:25,438 --> 00:12:27,075 MAJOR: That... that's nothing to be ashamed of. 271 00:12:27,076 --> 00:12:29,279 I'm not ashamed. I'm afraid. 272 00:12:31,711 --> 00:12:32,837 So what are we gonna do? 273 00:12:33,072 --> 00:12:34,072 I don't know. 274 00:12:34,097 --> 00:12:35,684 I-I don't even know what powers I have. 275 00:12:35,809 --> 00:12:38,005 Well, somebody must know. It must be written down somewhere. 276 00:12:38,361 --> 00:12:39,363 Yeah? 277 00:12:41,497 --> 00:12:43,050 Probably in here somewhere. 278 00:12:43,075 --> 00:12:44,114 YOSSARIAN: What the hell is that? 279 00:12:44,139 --> 00:12:47,395 MAJOR: It's the Group Leaders Operations Manual. 280 00:12:48,221 --> 00:12:49,786 Perhaps I should read it. 281 00:12:50,924 --> 00:12:53,178 Jesus Christ. Okay. 282 00:12:55,304 --> 00:12:56,348 You read this. 283 00:12:56,734 --> 00:12:58,487 You figure out what your powers are. 284 00:12:58,754 --> 00:13:01,060 And you can find me when you know how they can be used 285 00:13:01,061 --> 00:13:02,497 to help me, hmm? 286 00:13:02,522 --> 00:13:03,543 - Mm. - Hmm. 287 00:13:04,933 --> 00:13:05,933 I'll be in the hospital. 288 00:13:10,582 --> 00:13:11,590 Thank you, Major. 289 00:13:11,999 --> 00:13:14,252 I mean, thank you, sir. 290 00:13:14,846 --> 00:13:17,258 [QUIRKY MUSIC] 291 00:13:17,259 --> 00:13:20,628 ♪ ♪ 292 00:13:30,651 --> 00:13:33,040 Hello. How are you? 293 00:13:33,041 --> 00:13:35,128 ♪ ♪ 294 00:13:35,129 --> 00:13:37,215 Hi. Hi. 295 00:13:37,216 --> 00:13:38,620 How are you? 296 00:13:39,369 --> 00:13:40,518 Hello. 297 00:13:40,622 --> 00:13:45,589 ♪ ♪ 298 00:13:46,721 --> 00:13:47,838 What's going on here? 299 00:13:48,818 --> 00:13:50,862 I just need a few days, maximum. 300 00:13:51,160 --> 00:13:53,205 - A few days for what? - For my situation. 301 00:13:54,041 --> 00:13:55,711 My situation's complicated. 302 00:13:55,712 --> 00:13:57,524 I have a major working on it right now. 303 00:13:57,760 --> 00:14:00,011 He's having to sort through some very technical details. 304 00:14:00,012 --> 00:14:01,775 Documents. Debts. 305 00:14:02,433 --> 00:14:04,136 What's that got to do with you being in here? 306 00:14:04,323 --> 00:14:06,106 YOSSARIAN: Well, if it helps your situation at all, 307 00:14:06,107 --> 00:14:07,860 I really am feeling a little unwell. 308 00:14:07,995 --> 00:14:09,237 My situation? 309 00:14:09,527 --> 00:14:11,366 Look, I'll be quiet as a mouse. 310 00:14:11,589 --> 00:14:13,329 If you need a bed, I'm out of here in two minutes 311 00:14:13,330 --> 00:14:14,722 and you'll barely even know that I'm here. 312 00:14:17,465 --> 00:14:18,676 Please? 313 00:14:20,887 --> 00:14:23,892 [TOMMY DORSEY'S "THEN I'LL BE HAPPY"] 314 00:14:23,893 --> 00:14:27,605 ♪ ♪ 315 00:14:42,973 --> 00:14:45,824 TEXAN: Remember the Alamo? You're goddamn right I do. 316 00:14:46,910 --> 00:14:48,301 We didn't take no handouts. 317 00:14:48,526 --> 00:14:50,486 We took Texas by hook or by crook 318 00:14:50,487 --> 00:14:52,035 one county at a time. 319 00:14:52,366 --> 00:14:54,452 That's my grandpappy I'm talking about there, boy. 320 00:14:54,816 --> 00:14:56,504 His grandpappy 'fore him. 321 00:14:57,637 --> 00:15:00,089 Soil Conservation Society thinks they can tell us 322 00:15:00,090 --> 00:15:01,801 how to farm our own land. 323 00:15:01,802 --> 00:15:03,805 Well, we've been doing that for 120 years, 324 00:15:03,806 --> 00:15:04,988 thank you very much. 325 00:15:05,254 --> 00:15:07,410 You're very welcome indeed, sir. 326 00:15:08,918 --> 00:15:11,715 I grew up on a 900-acre spread out near Sonora. 327 00:15:12,387 --> 00:15:14,183 It's all horizon out there, boy. 328 00:15:14,769 --> 00:15:16,676 Horizon, every direction. 329 00:15:17,441 --> 00:15:18,537 [CHUCKLES] 330 00:15:18,562 --> 00:15:21,315 This one time, me and my pappy, we was leading 1,000 head 331 00:15:21,340 --> 00:15:23,387 through a dry gulch, and we heard this noise. 332 00:15:24,238 --> 00:15:25,746 What on earth could that be? 333 00:15:26,267 --> 00:15:28,449 Sounds a little like thunder. 334 00:15:28,898 --> 00:15:30,379 Only it keeps rumbling. 335 00:15:31,051 --> 00:15:32,445 And it ain't no thunder. 336 00:15:32,446 --> 00:15:34,808 Turns out it'd been raining up near Christoval. 337 00:15:35,558 --> 00:15:39,324 Whoo-hoo, them gulches ain't seen water in 100 years. 338 00:15:39,933 --> 00:15:41,988 And I'm yelling, "Pappy, you hearing this?" 339 00:15:42,527 --> 00:15:45,764 Suddenly, there's a longhorn about 100 yards up. 340 00:15:45,765 --> 00:15:48,185 He's met with a wall of water. 341 00:15:48,186 --> 00:15:50,500 [MIMICS WATER RUSHING] You could feel it hit him. 342 00:15:50,832 --> 00:15:52,785 Turned him flankside like a linebacker. 343 00:15:53,113 --> 00:15:56,118 And the wave is acting like a cow catcher on the front 344 00:15:56,119 --> 00:15:58,621 of a train just collecting all them steers. 345 00:15:58,725 --> 00:16:01,270 [MIMICS WATER RUSHING] 346 00:16:01,295 --> 00:16:02,548 And it's coming for us. 347 00:16:02,549 --> 00:16:04,342 Just a whole tumble fuck of... 348 00:16:04,343 --> 00:16:06,639 [IL VOLO'S "O SOLE MIO"] 349 00:16:06,664 --> 00:16:10,470 ♪ ♪ 350 00:16:24,362 --> 00:16:28,237 ♪ Che bella cosa ♪ 351 00:16:28,262 --> 00:16:32,017 ♪ Na jurnata 'e sole ♪ 352 00:16:32,042 --> 00:16:33,483 ♪ ♪ 353 00:16:33,484 --> 00:16:37,038 ♪ N'aria serena ♪ 354 00:16:37,063 --> 00:16:41,443 ♪ Doppo na tempesta ♪ 355 00:16:41,468 --> 00:16:42,544 ♪ ♪ 356 00:16:42,545 --> 00:16:47,007 ♪ Pe' ll'aria fresca ♪ 357 00:16:47,032 --> 00:16:50,949 ♪ Pare gia' na festa ♪ 358 00:16:50,974 --> 00:16:52,104 ♪ ♪ 359 00:16:52,105 --> 00:16:55,136 ♪ Che bella cosa ♪ 360 00:16:55,161 --> 00:17:00,477 ♪ Na jurnata 'e sole ♪ 361 00:17:00,502 --> 00:17:01,722 ♪ ♪ 362 00:17:07,762 --> 00:17:09,214 - Buongiorno. - Buongiorno. 363 00:17:09,387 --> 00:17:11,787 Un caffè, per favore. E un... 364 00:17:11,812 --> 00:17:14,190 - Ah, glass of water. - Si, signore. 365 00:17:14,191 --> 00:17:16,988 Uh, the, um... the building... the, um... 366 00:17:16,989 --> 00:17:18,198 What do you call it? Uh... 367 00:17:18,199 --> 00:17:19,456 Edificio. 368 00:17:19,481 --> 00:17:24,244 Who... Chi... owns the building? The... 369 00:17:24,269 --> 00:17:25,301 Scusi? 370 00:17:25,420 --> 00:17:29,113 Uh, the proprietario of the edificio. 371 00:17:29,138 --> 00:17:31,058 Un secondo. Giuseppe. 372 00:17:33,325 --> 00:17:35,291 L'americano vuole sapere chi è proprietario del... 373 00:17:35,316 --> 00:17:36,902 Proprietario. That's it, that's it. 374 00:17:36,903 --> 00:17:38,778 Dammi una mano. Non so cosa consegui. 375 00:17:38,803 --> 00:17:39,981 May I help you, sir? 376 00:17:40,460 --> 00:17:41,715 Ah. English. 377 00:17:42,582 --> 00:17:44,606 I want to know who owns that building 'cause I need 378 00:17:44,631 --> 00:17:46,756 to requisition it on behalf of the fighting men 379 00:17:46,757 --> 00:17:48,677 of the United States of America. 380 00:17:53,920 --> 00:17:56,107 TEXAN: People of means, decent folk, 381 00:17:56,108 --> 00:17:59,948 they deserve more votes than drifters and whores... criminals. 382 00:18:00,233 --> 00:18:02,829 Degenerates, atheists. They're indecent folk. 383 00:18:02,830 --> 00:18:04,108 You know, people without means. 384 00:18:04,751 --> 00:18:06,086 You know what I'm saying? 385 00:18:06,087 --> 00:18:08,485 Way I see it, there's only two types of people in this world. 386 00:18:08,562 --> 00:18:10,529 People of means and people without means. 387 00:18:10,554 --> 00:18:12,516 You gotta get me a private room. 388 00:18:12,905 --> 00:18:14,102 I'm losing my mind. 389 00:18:14,103 --> 00:18:16,311 This has become a mental health issue now. 390 00:18:17,468 --> 00:18:19,913 What about that oath that you take about not doing me any harm? 391 00:18:19,989 --> 00:18:21,677 - The Hippocratic oath? - YOSSARIAN: That's the one. 392 00:18:21,918 --> 00:18:23,120 That's just for doctors. 393 00:18:23,543 --> 00:18:24,957 YOSSARIAN: Oh, come on. What do you say? 394 00:18:25,128 --> 00:18:26,585 A little peace and quiet would be 395 00:18:26,586 --> 00:18:28,338 tremendously beneficial to me. 396 00:18:28,612 --> 00:18:29,612 Don't push it. 397 00:18:30,754 --> 00:18:32,901 - Lift your tongue. - TEXAN: One man, one vote's poppycock. 398 00:18:33,307 --> 00:18:35,557 But one man ain't always equal to one other man. 399 00:18:35,867 --> 00:18:38,204 That's just the way it is. That's the law of nature, man. 400 00:18:38,276 --> 00:18:41,364 Some folks, it's just... it's claws and disembowelment 401 00:18:41,365 --> 00:18:42,534 from cradle to gra... 402 00:18:42,535 --> 00:18:44,328 [PLANE ENGINES RUMBLING] 403 00:18:44,329 --> 00:18:45,916 [TIRES SQUEALING] 404 00:18:52,560 --> 00:18:54,140 KORN: Now, with one new runway... this one... 405 00:18:54,141 --> 00:18:55,769 you increase your overall flight capacity 406 00:18:55,770 --> 00:18:57,519 to 162 per day. 407 00:18:57,544 --> 00:18:58,733 - CATHCART: Additional? - KORN: Correct, sir. 408 00:18:58,734 --> 00:19:01,662 Now, a second runway, engineering-wise, it's a bigger job. 409 00:19:01,687 --> 00:19:03,969 We have to extend out here past the spit. 410 00:19:03,994 --> 00:19:05,789 But if we do that, you're gonna be able to siphon 411 00:19:05,790 --> 00:19:08,961 off some of the heavier cargo flights from runway one 412 00:19:08,962 --> 00:19:13,163 and that'll take you to 420 individual flights per week. 413 00:19:13,424 --> 00:19:14,577 420? 414 00:19:15,421 --> 00:19:17,562 No one on the other bases come close to that. 415 00:19:17,563 --> 00:19:18,941 I don't think so, sir, no. 416 00:19:20,852 --> 00:19:23,444 This is a three-month flow chart analyzing the cost 417 00:19:23,469 --> 00:19:24,881 of the one runway option versus... 418 00:19:24,906 --> 00:19:26,584 Well, forget the one runway option, Korn. 419 00:19:26,609 --> 00:19:27,779 - Think big. - KORN: Yes. I thought so. 420 00:19:27,804 --> 00:19:29,396 For God's sakes, if I had a nickel for every 421 00:19:29,421 --> 00:19:31,194 small thought of yours, I'd be the richest... 422 00:19:35,017 --> 00:19:36,608 What on God's green Earth is that? 423 00:19:39,702 --> 00:19:41,192 MILO: It's only me, sir. 424 00:19:41,772 --> 00:19:42,946 CATHCART: Who in the hell are you? 425 00:19:43,061 --> 00:19:45,443 I'm Milo Minderbinder, sir. I'm the new mess officer. 426 00:19:45,468 --> 00:19:46,568 You may have heard of me. 427 00:19:46,666 --> 00:19:48,559 Do you realize these men have orders to shoot to kill? 428 00:19:48,584 --> 00:19:52,423 We come bearing tomatoes, sir. 429 00:19:52,424 --> 00:19:53,978 You're gonna have to try this. 430 00:20:03,234 --> 00:20:04,330 Wait, wait. 431 00:20:08,611 --> 00:20:10,494 This is olive oil, sir. 432 00:20:10,519 --> 00:20:12,353 The Italians use it for everything. 433 00:20:12,840 --> 00:20:14,051 [CORK POPS] 434 00:20:29,630 --> 00:20:31,322 - My God. - You get it? 435 00:20:33,290 --> 00:20:34,509 Korn, try one of these. 436 00:20:35,449 --> 00:20:36,449 [GROANS] 437 00:20:38,057 --> 00:20:39,072 Good God. 438 00:20:40,389 --> 00:20:41,647 [JOHNNY HODGES "THINGS AIN'T WHAT THEY USED TO BE"] 439 00:20:41,648 --> 00:20:44,235 They're selling for $3 a bale in London! 440 00:20:44,236 --> 00:20:46,960 That's a 550% markup! 441 00:20:47,535 --> 00:20:50,957 550? That's an interesting number. 442 00:20:50,958 --> 00:20:54,011 You're saying that I'm buying tomatoes off of you 443 00:20:54,036 --> 00:20:55,041 in this scenario? 444 00:20:55,066 --> 00:20:56,844 Well, what I'm actually saying, sir, 445 00:20:56,845 --> 00:21:00,017 is that for you this time it's actually an infinity percent 446 00:21:00,018 --> 00:21:02,856 markup because... because I'd like you 447 00:21:02,857 --> 00:21:06,213 to have these tomatoes, sir, to do with as you may! 448 00:21:06,799 --> 00:21:07,985 Well, that's very generous of you, 449 00:21:08,010 --> 00:21:09,393 but I couldn't possibly take all these tomato... 450 00:21:09,418 --> 00:21:10,889 And then of course in the normal course of business, 451 00:21:10,914 --> 00:21:12,584 I could offer you future shipments 452 00:21:12,585 --> 00:21:15,130 at very attractive rates, almost at my cost, sir. 453 00:21:15,131 --> 00:21:17,342 So you'd be dropping from infinity percent 454 00:21:17,343 --> 00:21:21,894 back to 500, 300, thereabouts, should you wish to participate. 455 00:21:21,895 --> 00:21:23,898 Well, Milo... participate? 456 00:21:23,899 --> 00:21:25,402 Participate. 457 00:21:26,281 --> 00:21:28,114 Oh, Milo, commerce isn't exactly my bag. 458 00:21:28,115 --> 00:21:29,868 - I've got a base to ru... - Oh, you'd be a natural, sir. 459 00:21:29,869 --> 00:21:31,638 I got a good eye for these things. 460 00:21:32,857 --> 00:21:36,707 I am planning on building a couple runways out there 461 00:21:36,740 --> 00:21:38,695 to increase flight capacity, all that jazz... 462 00:21:38,720 --> 00:21:40,472 - but I'm not... - Well, increased flight capacity means 463 00:21:40,473 --> 00:21:42,852 increased profits for those with the vision to see. 464 00:21:43,552 --> 00:21:46,944 - War is not about profit, son. - Absolutely, sir. Not only. 465 00:21:46,945 --> 00:21:49,448 War is about the justs defeating the unjusts. 466 00:21:49,449 --> 00:21:51,357 It is absolutely that, too, sir. 467 00:21:53,021 --> 00:21:54,279 What about you, son? 468 00:21:54,520 --> 00:21:55,982 Are you enjoying your missions? 469 00:21:57,521 --> 00:21:59,426 I'm proud to be doing my bit, sir. 470 00:21:59,427 --> 00:22:01,935 Yes, indeed. Thank you for asking. 471 00:22:02,685 --> 00:22:04,849 Good, good. Good, good. 472 00:22:09,541 --> 00:22:11,028 TEXAN: Are you a Bill Bevens man? 473 00:22:11,185 --> 00:22:13,153 Or are you a Ralph Branca man? Hmm? 474 00:22:13,387 --> 00:22:14,708 Well, let's look at this season. 475 00:22:15,251 --> 00:22:18,200 Bill Bevens has got an ERA so far of 3.68. 476 00:22:18,888 --> 00:22:21,802 But his 1944 ERA was 2.67. 477 00:22:21,907 --> 00:22:23,450 See, you gotta ask yourself, what happened 478 00:22:23,475 --> 00:22:24,880 to Bill Bevens this year? 479 00:22:25,770 --> 00:22:27,274 Now, Ralph Branca, his ERA's around three, 480 00:22:27,275 --> 00:22:29,278 but you gotta remember kid's 19, right? 481 00:22:29,279 --> 00:22:30,990 He's just gonna keep getting better. 482 00:22:30,991 --> 00:22:34,044 And Bill Bevens, he's 28. That elbow's getting tired. 483 00:22:34,356 --> 00:22:35,950 So you're the Yankee's GM. What are you gonna do? 484 00:22:35,975 --> 00:22:37,349 How often you gonna relieve him? 485 00:22:37,480 --> 00:22:39,232 Well, who do you got? 486 00:22:39,257 --> 00:22:41,595 You got Tiny Bonham, you got Spud Chandler... 487 00:22:41,596 --> 00:22:43,536 He can't fucking hear you! 488 00:22:44,080 --> 00:22:45,913 We don't even know if he's alive in there! 489 00:22:45,938 --> 00:22:47,283 - I can hear you. - I know you can, buddy. 490 00:22:47,284 --> 00:22:48,984 Do we all have to listen to your bullshit? 491 00:22:48,985 --> 00:22:51,317 - TEXAN: What's your fucking problem? - You! You're my fucking problem! 492 00:22:51,318 --> 00:22:53,540 - Me? What did I do? - You won't shut up! 493 00:22:53,541 --> 00:22:56,102 I can't even hear myself think! This is a fucking hospital! 494 00:22:56,127 --> 00:22:58,614 TEXAN: Yeah, it's a fucking hospital. It's not a fucking library! 495 00:22:58,615 --> 00:23:01,092 I'm helping this fuck, man. He's trapped in there. 496 00:23:01,093 --> 00:23:02,929 - Where's your humanity? - Oh, you're bringing him 497 00:23:02,930 --> 00:23:04,188 out of his shell, are you? 498 00:23:04,213 --> 00:23:05,661 - Come on, guys. - Stay out of it, buddy. 499 00:23:05,662 --> 00:23:07,772 YOSSARIAN: I just want some peace and quiet. 500 00:23:07,932 --> 00:23:11,009 We all do. We're all just trying to fucking convalesce here. 501 00:23:11,034 --> 00:23:13,575 Oh, okay, you've been elected ward spokesman now, 502 00:23:13,576 --> 00:23:15,259 is that right, numb nuts? 503 00:23:15,284 --> 00:23:16,581 [CLATTERING] 504 00:23:16,582 --> 00:23:18,167 - You want a piece of me? - Not really. 505 00:23:18,168 --> 00:23:19,546 - Well, you're gonna get one. - Okay, then. 506 00:23:19,547 --> 00:23:20,603 - Okay, then. - Great. 507 00:23:20,628 --> 00:23:21,675 Great. 508 00:23:21,676 --> 00:23:22,969 [BOTH GRUNTING] 509 00:23:22,970 --> 00:23:23,971 [CLATTERING] 510 00:23:23,972 --> 00:23:25,970 [SHOUTING] 511 00:23:26,370 --> 00:23:28,957 Hey, hey! What is going on here? 512 00:23:28,982 --> 00:23:30,815 Hey! Knock it off! 513 00:23:31,125 --> 00:23:32,713 YOSSARIAN: Ah, I'll kill you! 514 00:23:34,599 --> 00:23:36,674 That's it, Yossarian. You're out of here! 515 00:23:40,046 --> 00:23:41,046 What? 516 00:23:42,551 --> 00:23:44,716 MAN: Son of a bitch! Let's go! 517 00:23:45,637 --> 00:23:48,106 MAN: Yo-Yo, come on, are we close yet? 518 00:23:48,480 --> 00:23:50,255 MAN: Okay, where we at? 519 00:23:51,164 --> 00:23:54,219 MAN: Clear, 053. Holding at 3,200. 520 00:23:55,869 --> 00:23:56,995 MAN: You got fire. Are you okay? 521 00:23:56,996 --> 00:23:58,456 MAN: Yo-Yo, we almost there? 522 00:23:58,457 --> 00:23:59,918 MAN: We're holding. 523 00:23:59,919 --> 00:24:01,828 MAN: Open them up! Open them up! 524 00:24:02,841 --> 00:24:05,106 Fucking Christ. Jesus fucking Christ. 525 00:24:05,659 --> 00:24:07,036 Jeez! 526 00:24:07,225 --> 00:24:09,747 Ooh, fuck! Ooh, fuck! 527 00:24:09,772 --> 00:24:12,223 MAN: Yeah, we're coming up on it now. 528 00:24:12,861 --> 00:24:15,153 All right, just hold steady right there. 529 00:24:15,449 --> 00:24:17,244 MAN: We're over it now. We gotta drop. 530 00:24:17,245 --> 00:24:18,539 Let's go. Open them up. 531 00:24:18,540 --> 00:24:20,668 ♪ ♪ 532 00:24:20,669 --> 00:24:21,962 Coming up on your left, Yossarian. 533 00:24:21,963 --> 00:24:23,674 Are you holding steady? 534 00:24:23,675 --> 00:24:25,661 MAN: We're sitting right on top of them, Yo-Yo! 535 00:24:26,346 --> 00:24:28,976 Yo-Yo! Drop them, Yo-Yo! 536 00:24:28,977 --> 00:24:31,596 YOSSARIAN: And... release. 537 00:24:31,816 --> 00:24:34,153 [PLANE ENGINES ROARING] 538 00:24:34,154 --> 00:24:37,159 [BOOMING] 539 00:24:38,997 --> 00:24:41,541 [MOTORCYCLE PUTTERING] 540 00:24:46,888 --> 00:24:48,055 MAN: Now I push. 541 00:24:48,056 --> 00:24:49,809 - MAN: Okay. - Forget it. 542 00:24:49,810 --> 00:24:50,970 Fold, I'm out. 543 00:24:51,229 --> 00:24:52,352 - MAN: What? - MAN: It's fine. 544 00:24:52,377 --> 00:24:54,446 You would've thought I would've been more of a problem. 545 00:24:54,874 --> 00:24:56,877 [ALL SHOUTING] 546 00:24:56,902 --> 00:24:58,218 - MAN: Come on. - MAN: Not fair! 547 00:24:58,243 --> 00:24:59,501 MAN: Come on. 548 00:25:00,456 --> 00:25:03,237 Very nice. Very clean. Bellissimo. 549 00:25:03,807 --> 00:25:04,963 Leave her alone, Aarfy. 550 00:25:05,197 --> 00:25:07,236 AARFY: I'm just saying, she's very clean. 551 00:25:07,261 --> 00:25:08,533 What's your name, honey? 552 00:25:09,158 --> 00:25:12,469 Uh, what is it? Qual è il tuo... 553 00:25:12,494 --> 00:25:14,111 Um... Qual è il tuo nome? 554 00:25:14,853 --> 00:25:15,962 Mi chiamo Michaela. 555 00:25:15,987 --> 00:25:17,799 Michaela. That's very nice. 556 00:25:17,824 --> 00:25:19,827 Me and you should go for a walk sometime, Michaela. 557 00:25:19,828 --> 00:25:20,860 MICHAELA: Scusi? 558 00:25:20,885 --> 00:25:22,759 AARFY: We should go for a walk sometime! 559 00:25:23,446 --> 00:25:24,963 You look like Bette Davis. 560 00:25:24,964 --> 00:25:27,217 Oh, give it a rest, Aarfy. She doesn't understand you. 561 00:25:27,218 --> 00:25:28,720 [INDISTINCT CHATTER] 562 00:25:28,721 --> 00:25:29,908 Gentlemen. 563 00:25:30,644 --> 00:25:31,729 No, no, sit down. 564 00:25:34,096 --> 00:25:35,609 So, how are we? 565 00:25:35,610 --> 00:25:38,891 Enjoying our rest and recreation in the eternal city? 566 00:25:38,916 --> 00:25:40,578 SAMPSON: Oh, yes, sir. We are, sir. 567 00:25:41,291 --> 00:25:43,792 DE COVERLY: Oh, what's on the dance card for this evening? 568 00:25:43,955 --> 00:25:46,840 Uh, Nately lost his mind to a woman of the night. 569 00:25:46,841 --> 00:25:49,025 [LAUGHTER] 570 00:25:50,306 --> 00:25:54,056 She's, like, the most real person that I've ever met, Yo-Yo. 571 00:25:54,789 --> 00:25:56,884 NATELY: She tries to speak English. 572 00:25:57,914 --> 00:26:01,704 She gets the words wrong and we laugh. 573 00:26:02,087 --> 00:26:04,618 We just laugh a lot. 574 00:26:04,752 --> 00:26:07,882 [REX STUART'S "MY SUNDAY GAL"] 575 00:26:08,008 --> 00:26:10,638 Yeah, we talked all night. How does that happen? 576 00:26:10,639 --> 00:26:13,059 You know, I've got this phrase book, 577 00:26:13,060 --> 00:26:14,729 but it's not like I'm looking at the phrase book 578 00:26:14,730 --> 00:26:15,814 every two seconds. 579 00:26:15,815 --> 00:26:18,220 We just talk. 580 00:26:19,357 --> 00:26:21,474 You know, it's some of her words. It's some of my words. 581 00:26:21,536 --> 00:26:24,927 We put them together, and somehow it all makes sense. 582 00:26:26,122 --> 00:26:29,842 We cuddle. We fuck, yeah. 583 00:26:29,843 --> 00:26:31,846 [LAUGHS] It's crazy. 584 00:26:31,847 --> 00:26:34,896 She's just, like, a real person. 585 00:26:34,921 --> 00:26:39,622 ♪ ♪ 586 00:27:09,923 --> 00:27:12,310 MARCELLO: America will lose the war, my friend. 587 00:27:12,521 --> 00:27:14,302 And Italy will win it. 588 00:27:15,738 --> 00:27:19,582 America is the strongest and most prosperous nation on earth, 589 00:27:19,777 --> 00:27:21,918 and the American fighting man is second to none. 590 00:27:22,590 --> 00:27:25,077 Why do you think we are here and the Germans are on the run? 591 00:27:25,371 --> 00:27:30,129 And Italy, on the other hand, is one of the least prosperous 592 00:27:30,130 --> 00:27:31,347 nations on Earth. 593 00:27:32,144 --> 00:27:34,675 And the Italian fighting man is probably second to all. 594 00:27:35,642 --> 00:27:39,105 And that's exactly why my country is doing so well 595 00:27:39,106 --> 00:27:43,293 in this war while your country is doing so poorly. 596 00:27:44,613 --> 00:27:46,663 The Germans have been driven out now, 597 00:27:46,664 --> 00:27:48,972 as you so correctly observe. 598 00:27:49,675 --> 00:27:51,793 In a few months, you will be gone too. 599 00:27:52,636 --> 00:27:54,425 And we will still be here. 600 00:27:54,638 --> 00:27:55,966 Oh, amen to that. 601 00:27:57,286 --> 00:28:02,161 You see, Italy is really a very poor and weak country. 602 00:28:02,278 --> 00:28:04,965 And that's what makes us so strong. 603 00:28:06,559 --> 00:28:08,665 Italian soldiers are not dying anymore, 604 00:28:08,666 --> 00:28:11,098 but American and German soldiers are, no? 605 00:28:12,004 --> 00:28:14,510 I call that doing extremely well. 606 00:28:14,511 --> 00:28:15,971 [LAUGHS] 607 00:28:15,972 --> 00:28:17,723 Italy will survive this war 608 00:28:17,976 --> 00:28:19,812 and still be in existence 609 00:28:19,813 --> 00:28:23,387 long after your own country has been destroyed. 610 00:28:24,614 --> 00:28:26,949 America is not going to be destroyed. 611 00:28:28,473 --> 00:28:30,249 I wish for your sake it were true. 612 00:28:30,250 --> 00:28:31,480 For your beliefs. 613 00:28:32,171 --> 00:28:36,973 Because America is a very great and noble idea. 614 00:28:37,372 --> 00:28:38,558 You're too right. It is. 615 00:28:38,559 --> 00:28:39,997 Yeah, it's a wonderful idea. 616 00:28:40,324 --> 00:28:43,622 But Rome was destroyed. Greece was destroyed. 617 00:28:43,694 --> 00:28:47,217 Persia was destroyed. Spain was destroyed. 618 00:28:47,242 --> 00:28:50,488 All great empires are destroyed. 619 00:28:51,769 --> 00:28:52,816 Why not yours? 620 00:28:53,519 --> 00:28:55,383 We are gonna survive and triumph 621 00:28:55,384 --> 00:28:56,698 for a long, long time. 622 00:28:56,723 --> 00:28:57,796 [CHUCKLES] 623 00:28:57,821 --> 00:28:59,745 You put so much stock in winning. 624 00:29:00,761 --> 00:29:04,229 But listen, the real trick is losing wars. 625 00:29:05,151 --> 00:29:07,240 Uh, in knowing which wars can be lost. 626 00:29:07,241 --> 00:29:08,325 [LAUGHING] 627 00:29:08,542 --> 00:29:09,847 You talk like a madman. 628 00:29:10,319 --> 00:29:12,194 But I live like a sane one. 629 00:29:13,178 --> 00:29:16,295 I was a fascist when Mussolini was on top, 630 00:29:16,677 --> 00:29:20,811 and I am an anti-fascist now he has been deposed. 631 00:29:21,452 --> 00:29:25,527 I was fanatically pro-German when the Germans were here 632 00:29:25,528 --> 00:29:27,616 to protect us against the Americans. 633 00:29:27,991 --> 00:29:30,178 And now the Americans are here to protect us 634 00:29:30,203 --> 00:29:33,538 against the Germans, I'm fanatical pro-American. 635 00:29:34,991 --> 00:29:37,216 I assure you that you and your country 636 00:29:37,217 --> 00:29:40,952 will have no more loyal partisan in Italy than me. 637 00:29:41,913 --> 00:29:44,440 But only for as long as you remain. 638 00:29:46,553 --> 00:29:48,280 Don't you have any principles? 639 00:29:48,281 --> 00:29:49,575 Oh, of course not. 640 00:29:49,576 --> 00:29:50,874 CLEVINGER: No morality? 641 00:29:51,037 --> 00:29:54,687 Oh, no. I'm a very, very moral man. 642 00:29:55,967 --> 00:29:57,687 And you have good taste in brandy. 643 00:29:59,470 --> 00:30:00,972 One does one's best. 644 00:30:00,973 --> 00:30:02,413 CLARA: Marcello. 645 00:30:09,443 --> 00:30:11,232 Yo-Yo, You gotta convince her to stay with me. 646 00:30:11,266 --> 00:30:14,249 Just tell him to tell her that I'm good for it. 647 00:30:14,494 --> 00:30:16,570 Or... Or... Or lend me some money. How you doing for cash? 648 00:30:16,741 --> 00:30:19,662 I spent $640 on 32 hours straight. 649 00:30:19,687 --> 00:30:20,771 How did I do that? 650 00:30:20,796 --> 00:30:22,403 Well, love did. That's what love does. 651 00:30:22,428 --> 00:30:23,522 NATELY: What am I gonna do? 652 00:30:23,547 --> 00:30:24,577 YOSSARIAN: Didn't your dad give you money? 653 00:30:24,602 --> 00:30:25,842 I love him. Can you... Can you... 654 00:30:25,999 --> 00:30:27,272 He did. He gave me money. 655 00:30:27,297 --> 00:30:29,714 But that's already gone. I mean, what have I done? 656 00:30:29,897 --> 00:30:31,534 Oh, 32 hours, who knows? 657 00:30:31,535 --> 00:30:32,786 [LAUGHTER] 658 00:30:32,811 --> 00:30:34,044 - MARCELLO: Clarina. - Mm? 659 00:30:38,350 --> 00:30:40,272 MARCELLO: Oh. What's your name? 660 00:30:40,940 --> 00:30:41,940 I'm Nately, sir. 661 00:30:42,296 --> 00:30:44,678 Nately... because it's Sunday, 662 00:30:45,194 --> 00:30:47,148 because you... you are a nice boy, 663 00:30:47,149 --> 00:30:50,195 I give you two hours because you make happy 664 00:30:50,196 --> 00:30:51,671 my little Clarina. 665 00:30:52,756 --> 00:30:55,307 Two hours? W-we have... we have two hours? 666 00:30:55,677 --> 00:30:56,709 MARCELLO: Yeah. 667 00:30:56,796 --> 00:30:59,711 It's a gift from the people of Italy. Go. 668 00:31:00,050 --> 00:31:01,469 Thank you. Thank you, sir. 669 00:31:02,680 --> 00:31:04,565 Eh, si. Bye, bye, bye, bye. 670 00:31:04,590 --> 00:31:05,594 NATELY: Come on. 671 00:31:05,790 --> 00:31:06,917 MARCELLO: Bye. 672 00:31:08,525 --> 00:31:09,777 [BOTH LAUGHING] 673 00:31:09,802 --> 00:31:10,820 He won't need two hours. 674 00:31:11,461 --> 00:31:12,765 [BOTH LAUGHING] 675 00:31:24,139 --> 00:31:25,350 What have you got there? 676 00:31:33,344 --> 00:31:36,226 I, uh... I don't speak Italian, honey. 677 00:31:36,961 --> 00:31:38,711 What's, uh... what's your name? 678 00:31:42,092 --> 00:31:44,311 Smoke. Smoke. 679 00:31:44,336 --> 00:31:45,557 Yeah, I'm... I'm good for cigarettes. 680 00:31:45,558 --> 00:31:46,562 Thanks. 681 00:31:53,114 --> 00:31:54,449 I don't... [CHUCKLES] 682 00:31:54,450 --> 00:31:57,067 I don't... I don't speak... what's... 683 00:31:57,414 --> 00:31:59,590 what's your... what's your name? You? 684 00:32:00,238 --> 00:32:01,238 Your name. 685 00:32:01,894 --> 00:32:03,394 - Ines. - YOSSARIAN: Ines. 686 00:32:03,808 --> 00:32:05,026 Well, that's a beautiful name. 687 00:32:05,263 --> 00:32:07,099 - INES: You? - Me, I'm Yo-Yo. 688 00:32:07,100 --> 00:32:08,101 INES: Yo-Yo. 689 00:32:08,102 --> 00:32:09,772 - Yo-Yo. - Yo-Yo. 690 00:32:09,773 --> 00:32:11,944 - YO-YO. [CHUCKLES] - YOSSARIAN: Yeah. 691 00:32:12,140 --> 00:32:13,988 Hey, Ines, where's, uh... where's your mom and dad? 692 00:32:13,989 --> 00:32:15,325 Your, uh... your parents? 693 00:32:17,128 --> 00:32:18,640 Uh, okay. 694 00:32:19,333 --> 00:32:22,155 Well, how much for this? 695 00:32:22,882 --> 00:32:24,171 Cinque. 696 00:32:24,969 --> 00:32:26,139 YOSSARIAN: Lira? 697 00:32:27,265 --> 00:32:28,811 Good God, Ines. 698 00:32:29,313 --> 00:32:30,670 You're a tough operator. 699 00:32:31,444 --> 00:32:33,671 Uh, all right. 700 00:32:34,764 --> 00:32:36,561 Find a use for this, I guess, somehow. 701 00:32:37,717 --> 00:32:38,887 [LAUGHS] 702 00:32:43,966 --> 00:32:46,184 All right, kid. Thank you. 703 00:32:47,825 --> 00:32:51,106 Hey, uh, go home to your, uh, parents or... 704 00:32:52,462 --> 00:32:53,462 yeah. 705 00:32:54,403 --> 00:32:55,747 All right, good, good. 706 00:32:56,356 --> 00:32:59,412 MILO: All right, fellas! I hope you like dried herring. 707 00:32:59,413 --> 00:33:01,124 YOSSARIAN: Hey, you going back to Pianosa? 708 00:33:01,125 --> 00:33:02,773 - Can we hitch a ride? - MILO: Where's yours? 709 00:33:03,039 --> 00:33:04,046 YOSSARIAN: I dunno. 710 00:33:04,047 --> 00:33:05,132 That's what we're waiting to find out. 711 00:33:05,133 --> 00:33:06,210 Well, mine's already full. 712 00:33:07,117 --> 00:33:08,723 You hear Cathcart's raised the missions again? 713 00:33:08,817 --> 00:33:09,817 Huh? 714 00:33:09,937 --> 00:33:11,812 You mean last month, to 35. 715 00:33:11,813 --> 00:33:13,273 No, I mean yesterday to 40. 716 00:33:13,274 --> 00:33:14,359 Are you serious? 717 00:33:14,694 --> 00:33:16,710 MILO: Oh, shit, guys. I thought you would have already have heard. 718 00:33:16,789 --> 00:33:17,936 How would we have heard? 719 00:33:18,451 --> 00:33:21,289 [PLANE ENGINES CHOPPING] 720 00:33:22,835 --> 00:33:25,798 [DRAMATIC MUSIC] 721 00:33:25,799 --> 00:33:30,305 ♪ ♪ 722 00:33:40,996 --> 00:33:43,609 - NATELY: Hey, she's not a whore. - MAN: She's not a whore? 723 00:33:43,634 --> 00:33:44,646 NATELY: I told you not to call her that. 724 00:33:44,671 --> 00:33:45,964 MAN: No, she's a librarian. 725 00:33:45,965 --> 00:33:47,676 And she just takes money for sex. 726 00:33:47,677 --> 00:33:49,178 MAN: Nately, she's a whore. 727 00:33:49,179 --> 00:33:53,016 ♪ ♪ 728 00:34:03,875 --> 00:34:06,129 YOSSARIAN: Am I supposed to get my ass shot off 729 00:34:06,130 --> 00:34:08,123 because Cathcart wants to become a general? 730 00:34:08,148 --> 00:34:09,243 What about the men on the mainland? 731 00:34:09,244 --> 00:34:10,724 Our boys on the ground, are they supposed to get 732 00:34:10,749 --> 00:34:12,905 their asses shot off just because you don't want to fly? 733 00:34:13,243 --> 00:34:14,730 Those boys are entitled to air support. 734 00:34:14,731 --> 00:34:17,318 Our boys on the ground. Would you listen to yourself? 735 00:34:17,319 --> 00:34:19,322 Now you're even talking like Cathcart. 736 00:34:19,323 --> 00:34:21,409 Yes, they're entitled to our support. 737 00:34:21,410 --> 00:34:25,059 But not necessarily by me. Not me specifically. 738 00:34:25,371 --> 00:34:27,630 The only reason we're still flying is not for some... 739 00:34:27,631 --> 00:34:29,425 for some noble purpose. 740 00:34:29,426 --> 00:34:31,513 It's because that bastard keeps raising our missions. 741 00:34:31,514 --> 00:34:33,642 Listen, you know very well that I don't approve 742 00:34:33,643 --> 00:34:35,521 of Colonel Cathcart any more than you do. 743 00:34:35,522 --> 00:34:37,817 But it is not for us to determine what targets 744 00:34:37,818 --> 00:34:39,949 must be destroyed, or who's to destroy them. 745 00:34:39,974 --> 00:34:41,370 Or who gets killed doing them and why? 746 00:34:41,395 --> 00:34:43,106 Yes, even that. We have no right to question... 747 00:34:43,131 --> 00:34:44,389 - Oh, you're insane. - No right to question the... 748 00:34:44,414 --> 00:34:46,254 Do you really mean that it's none of my business 749 00:34:46,279 --> 00:34:49,099 how or why I get killed and that it is Cathcart's? 750 00:34:49,124 --> 00:34:51,094 - Do you really mean that? - Yes, I do. 751 00:34:51,413 --> 00:34:52,806 There are men entrusted with winning the war 752 00:34:52,807 --> 00:34:54,433 who are in a much better position than we are 753 00:34:54,434 --> 00:34:56,437 to decide what targets have to be bombed 754 00:34:56,438 --> 00:34:58,149 and who has to do it. 755 00:34:58,150 --> 00:35:00,070 Okay, we're talking about two different things. 756 00:35:00,345 --> 00:35:02,032 You're talking about the relationship 757 00:35:02,033 --> 00:35:04,378 - of the Air Corps to the Infantry. - Yeah. 758 00:35:04,403 --> 00:35:07,268 And I'm talking about the relationship of me to Cathcart. 759 00:35:07,542 --> 00:35:09,213 You're talking about winning the war. 760 00:35:09,214 --> 00:35:11,969 And I'm talking about winning the war and keeping me alive. 761 00:35:12,250 --> 00:35:13,250 Exactly. 762 00:35:13,275 --> 00:35:14,736 And which do you think is more important? 763 00:35:14,934 --> 00:35:16,895 What? Open your eyes! 764 00:35:16,896 --> 00:35:19,568 Clevinger, it doesn't make a damn bit of difference 765 00:35:19,569 --> 00:35:21,231 who wins the war to someone who's dead. 766 00:35:21,232 --> 00:35:24,076 Congratulations. I can't think of another attitude that could be 767 00:35:24,077 --> 00:35:26,749 depended upon to give greater comfort to the enemy. 768 00:35:27,036 --> 00:35:30,022 The enemy is anybody who's gonna get you killed 769 00:35:30,047 --> 00:35:32,886 no matter which side he's on, and that includes Cathcart. 770 00:35:32,887 --> 00:35:34,806 And don't you forget that, 'cause the longer 771 00:35:34,807 --> 00:35:36,476 you remember it, the longer you might live. 772 00:35:36,477 --> 00:35:38,480 I want to live. Don't get me wrong. 773 00:35:38,481 --> 00:35:41,360 Then listen to me! Listen to Yo-Yo! 774 00:35:41,559 --> 00:35:44,565 I continually give you sound, lifesaving advice. 775 00:35:44,590 --> 00:35:46,035 I am helping you live. 776 00:35:46,235 --> 00:35:49,504 And you continue to recklessly operate on fucking principle. 777 00:35:50,254 --> 00:35:51,674 To my dying day. 778 00:35:57,937 --> 00:36:00,358 [CAR ENGINE REVVING] 779 00:36:01,861 --> 00:36:05,660 [ROSEMARY CLOONEY'S "NO LOVE, NO NOTHIN'"] 780 00:36:05,661 --> 00:36:10,153 ♪ No love, no nothing ♪ 781 00:36:10,187 --> 00:36:12,136 ♪ ♪ 782 00:36:12,161 --> 00:36:15,536 ♪ Until my baby comes home ♪ 783 00:36:16,074 --> 00:36:20,373 ♪ No, sir, no nothing ♪ 784 00:36:20,398 --> 00:36:22,192 ♪ ♪ 785 00:36:22,193 --> 00:36:25,472 ♪ As long as baby must roam ♪ 786 00:36:26,778 --> 00:36:31,563 ♪ I promised him I'd wait for him ♪ 787 00:36:31,588 --> 00:36:36,137 ♪ Till even Hades froze ♪ 788 00:36:36,138 --> 00:36:40,364 ♪ I'm lonesome, heaven knows ♪ 789 00:36:41,040 --> 00:36:45,450 ♪ But what I said still goes ♪ 790 00:36:45,985 --> 00:36:50,284 ♪ No love, no nothing ♪ 791 00:36:50,333 --> 00:36:52,044 ♪ ♪ 792 00:36:52,045 --> 00:36:55,760 ♪ And that's a promise I'll keep ♪ 793 00:36:55,761 --> 00:37:00,606 ♪ No fun with no one ♪ 794 00:37:01,786 --> 00:37:05,028 ♪ I'm getting plenty of sleep ♪ 795 00:37:05,656 --> 00:37:10,748 ♪ My heart's on strike and though it's like ♪ 796 00:37:10,749 --> 00:37:14,943 ♪ An empty honeycomb ♪ 797 00:37:15,341 --> 00:37:19,264 ♪ No love, no, sir, no nothing ♪ 798 00:37:19,265 --> 00:37:22,020 ♪ Till my baby comes home ♪ 799 00:37:22,021 --> 00:37:26,287 ♪ ♪ 800 00:37:32,336 --> 00:37:35,185 ♪ ♪ 801 00:37:58,845 --> 00:38:02,518 [PLANE ENGINES ROARING] 802 00:38:02,802 --> 00:38:04,731 And we buy from this syndicate? 803 00:38:05,208 --> 00:38:08,130 Yes, the fundamental principle is everybody has his share. 804 00:38:08,155 --> 00:38:10,417 And it's that mass purchasing power that makes 805 00:38:10,442 --> 00:38:12,715 the big difference. For example, lamb chops. 806 00:38:12,831 --> 00:38:14,364 I heard about those lamb chops. 807 00:38:14,413 --> 00:38:16,196 MILO: Well, then you'll have heard they're the best 808 00:38:16,221 --> 00:38:17,548 the black market has to offer. 809 00:38:17,549 --> 00:38:19,174 They're going for a song in Scotland. 810 00:38:19,994 --> 00:38:22,720 I can't send a plane to Scotland. I don't have the authority for that. 811 00:38:22,827 --> 00:38:24,955 I can if you lend me a plane. 812 00:38:24,980 --> 00:38:27,192 And then, colonel, there's Polish sausage 813 00:38:27,193 --> 00:38:28,780 that goes for peanuts in Cracow. 814 00:38:29,772 --> 00:38:32,194 Cracow's hundreds of miles behind enemy lines. 815 00:38:32,748 --> 00:38:34,111 How would you get to the sausage? 816 00:38:34,207 --> 00:38:37,347 There's an international Polish sausage exchange in Geneva. 817 00:38:37,443 --> 00:38:39,819 I'll just fly the peanuts into Switzerland 818 00:38:39,844 --> 00:38:41,470 and exchange them for Polish sausage 819 00:38:41,471 --> 00:38:42,863 at the open market rate. 820 00:38:42,960 --> 00:38:44,671 They'll fly the peanuts back to Cracow. 821 00:38:44,728 --> 00:38:46,690 I'll fly the Polish sausage back to you. 822 00:38:46,691 --> 00:38:49,916 You buy only as much Polish sausage as you want from the syndicate. 823 00:38:49,941 --> 00:38:51,616 There will be the tangerines too. 824 00:38:51,617 --> 00:38:54,007 And eggs from Malta and scotch from Sicily. 825 00:38:54,008 --> 00:38:55,428 You'll be paying the money to yourself 826 00:38:55,429 --> 00:38:57,085 from the syndicate since you'll own a share. 827 00:38:57,086 --> 00:38:59,406 So really you'll be getting everything you buy for nothing. 828 00:39:01,085 --> 00:39:02,296 Doesn't that make sense? 829 00:39:07,007 --> 00:39:10,013 [PLANE ENGINES RUMBLING] 830 00:39:17,177 --> 00:39:19,419 CLEVINGER: So you're helping the boys on the ground after all. 831 00:39:22,834 --> 00:39:24,732 Helping the boys on the ground. 832 00:39:25,071 --> 00:39:28,029 CLEVINGER: Good for you, Yo-Yo. Good for you. 833 00:39:29,685 --> 00:39:33,075 ♪ Yankee Doodle went to town ♪ 834 00:39:34,231 --> 00:39:38,036 ♪ Riding on a pony ♪ 835 00:39:38,949 --> 00:39:42,488 ♪ Stuck a feather in his cap ♪ 836 00:39:43,168 --> 00:39:46,847 ♪ And called it macaroni ♪ 837 00:39:47,683 --> 00:39:49,519 ♪ Yankee Doodle ♪ 838 00:39:49,730 --> 00:39:51,207 ♪ Keep it up ♪ 839 00:39:51,779 --> 00:39:54,910 ♪ Yankee Doodle dandy ♪ 840 00:39:55,614 --> 00:39:58,738 ♪ Mind the music and the step ♪ 841 00:39:58,763 --> 00:40:01,497 - YOSSARIAN: And... - CLEVINGER: ♪ And with the girls ♪ 842 00:40:01,522 --> 00:40:03,233 - Bombs away. - CLEVINGER: ♪ Be handy ♪ 843 00:40:04,243 --> 00:40:07,631 ♪ Yankee Doodle is a tune ♪ 844 00:40:08,126 --> 00:40:11,340 ♪ That comes in mighty handy ♪ 845 00:40:11,942 --> 00:40:15,607 ♪ The enemy all runs away ♪ 846 00:40:15,912 --> 00:40:16,912 ♪ At... ♪ 847 00:40:18,459 --> 00:40:20,794 [BOOMING] 848 00:40:20,795 --> 00:40:22,840 MCWATT: That's it for another day, gentlemen. 849 00:40:22,841 --> 00:40:24,217 We are heading home. 850 00:40:24,218 --> 00:40:26,180 We are out of here, Laden Maiden. 851 00:40:26,181 --> 00:40:29,187 [PLANE ENGINE RUMBLING] 852 00:40:32,944 --> 00:40:35,949 [DRAMATIC MUSIC] 853 00:40:35,950 --> 00:40:38,872 ♪ ♪ 854 00:40:38,873 --> 00:40:40,458 Did you hear something, McWatt? 855 00:40:40,459 --> 00:40:41,865 MCWATT: Did I hear what? 856 00:40:43,024 --> 00:40:44,485 Are you getting Laden Maiden? 857 00:40:44,510 --> 00:40:46,930 [HISSING] 858 00:40:46,931 --> 00:40:48,172 MCWATT: Clevinger? 859 00:40:48,672 --> 00:40:50,516 Hey, Clevinger? You there, buddy? 860 00:40:50,541 --> 00:40:52,460 ♪ ♪ 861 00:40:52,608 --> 00:40:54,068 I think it's just the radio. 862 00:40:54,195 --> 00:40:57,977 ♪ ♪ 863 00:40:59,603 --> 00:41:01,603 - Hey, has Laden Maiden landed? - MECHANIC: What? 864 00:41:01,806 --> 00:41:04,131 - Has Laden Maiden come back? - MECHANIC: I don't know, sir. 865 00:41:04,132 --> 00:41:07,262 ♪ ♪ 866 00:41:07,263 --> 00:41:08,783 YOSSARIAN: Did Laden Maiden land? 867 00:41:09,173 --> 00:41:11,938 ATC: This is tower to Army, 7499. 868 00:41:11,939 --> 00:41:13,650 Are you receiving? Over. 869 00:41:13,651 --> 00:41:15,486 ♪ ♪ 870 00:41:15,487 --> 00:41:18,492 This is tower to Army, 7499. 871 00:41:18,493 --> 00:41:19,745 Are you receiving? Over. 872 00:41:19,746 --> 00:41:22,543 ♪ ♪ 873 00:41:22,985 --> 00:41:26,133 This is tower to Army, 7499. 874 00:41:26,134 --> 00:41:27,761 Are you receiving? Over. 875 00:41:27,762 --> 00:41:30,099 ♪ ♪ 876 00:41:30,100 --> 00:41:33,022 This is tower to Army, 7499. 877 00:41:33,023 --> 00:41:34,650 Are you receiving? Over. 878 00:41:34,651 --> 00:41:40,126 ♪ ♪ 879 00:41:59,925 --> 00:42:01,524 CHAPLAIN: Still no news on Clevinger? 880 00:42:04,542 --> 00:42:05,542 Nothing. 881 00:42:07,188 --> 00:42:08,579 It's 36 hours now. 882 00:42:10,013 --> 00:42:11,642 He's on the Missing in Action list. 883 00:42:14,099 --> 00:42:15,143 It's official. 884 00:42:18,154 --> 00:42:19,490 That's no good. 885 00:42:22,399 --> 00:42:24,087 You were with him in Santa Ana? 886 00:42:25,210 --> 00:42:26,770 Yeah, we went through the whole thing. 887 00:42:28,341 --> 00:42:29,636 Clevinger was... 888 00:42:32,235 --> 00:42:33,954 He was just good. 889 00:42:35,055 --> 00:42:36,057 Basically. 890 00:42:48,852 --> 00:42:50,426 CATHCART: Bologna, gentlemen. 891 00:42:50,868 --> 00:42:52,696 This is where the rubber hits the road. 892 00:42:53,684 --> 00:42:56,679 Enemy artillery are here, here, and here. 893 00:42:56,899 --> 00:42:58,937 But our raiders are not getting to them 894 00:42:59,491 --> 00:43:03,280 because they're being torn to shreds both here, here, 895 00:43:03,757 --> 00:43:04,827 and here. 896 00:43:05,835 --> 00:43:09,225 Our guess is, there are Howitzers based in those cave systems. 897 00:43:11,069 --> 00:43:15,756 Here, here, and, uh, eh, somewhere around there. 898 00:43:16,983 --> 00:43:18,291 Very difficult to pinpoint a target. 899 00:43:18,316 --> 00:43:19,639 It's basically a hole in the ground, 900 00:43:20,088 --> 00:43:21,717 as you men well know. 901 00:43:22,867 --> 00:43:27,084 Now, some of you will not be coming back. 902 00:43:29,965 --> 00:43:31,444 There's no other way of telling you that. 903 00:43:32,577 --> 00:43:35,014 Just basic statistics tell us that. 904 00:43:36,475 --> 00:43:40,861 So, if any of you should find yourself on the wrong side 905 00:43:40,862 --> 00:43:43,783 of the statistics... and at the risk of stating the obvious... 906 00:43:43,784 --> 00:43:47,457 I would like to point out that your sacrifice will not 907 00:43:47,458 --> 00:43:48,710 have been in vain. 908 00:43:49,396 --> 00:43:54,249 And, if in your final moments, you see death 909 00:43:54,430 --> 00:43:56,460 coming for you, think not of death. 910 00:43:57,139 --> 00:44:00,303 Think of the living. And know this. 911 00:44:00,819 --> 00:44:02,905 God damn it, the 27th Air Corps Division 912 00:44:02,906 --> 00:44:04,967 thanks you for your sacrifice, gentlemen. 913 00:44:05,536 --> 00:44:10,715 [BREATHING HEAVILY] 914 00:44:11,590 --> 00:44:14,344 [THE MOUND CITY BLUE BLOWERS' "I'VE GOT MY FINGERS CROSSED"] 915 00:44:14,466 --> 00:44:17,866 Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie www.addic7ed.com 66931

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