Original subtitles

Maybe the world is blind or just a little unkind.

Don't know.

Seems you can't be sure of anything anymore.

the vacuum.

Frankie, this is Saturday.

You're supposed to be cleaning the house. Why is Brandon doing your chores?

We traded jobs.

He's vacuuming and I'm getting hair on the couch.

Get to work.

But Sherry's bringing over her cousin any minute. So?

So we want her to be comfortable.

After all, she's on vacation.

You know, shoes off, feet up.

Veged out.

The perfect hostess.

Hostess! Brandon, go get the ding -dongs.

And I better not smell marshmallows on your breath.

So, what do you know about Cherry's cousin?

I don't know much.

Her name's Paula.

Her brother's name's Bobby.

Her parents are on their second honeymoon.

Her favorite things are water skiing, potato chips, and freaking out to the

Beastie Boys.

Oh, and by the way, she's a terrific artist.

You don't know much.

The only thing you missed was her shoe size.

4B.

You're here.

Hi, Paula, this is my best friend, Punky.

Punky, this is my favorite cousin, Paula.

Hi, I've heard a lot about you.

Well, knowing Cherry, that doesn't surprise me. This is my dad, Henry

Hi. Hi, Paula.

Kick off your four B's and I'll crank up the beastie boys.

Hi, everyone.

This is Paula's brother, Bobby.

Isn't that special?

No.

He's all worn out from the trip.

He could probably use a nap.

You'd make a great mother, Henry.

Mind if I put him in your bed?

My bed?

Perhaps you didn't hear.

He just threw up?

Paula changed his clothes.

Please, just for a minute, till I catch my breath.

There are a lot of fragile, breakable things in my room.

Well, if you'd rather I wouldn't, I could put him to sleep upstairs and just

there all alone.

No one to talk to, just staring at the wall.

Okay, you can put him in my room, but remember my regular policy.

Right. If you break it, you're back.

your face. No, don't! I've got to draw this.

Right, Granny.

Because he looks better from his right side.

You like to draw animals?

Yes, sit down. You're next.

I beg your pardon?

No, she means she draws everything.

Paula's a great artist.

We're trying to get her to enter...

An art contest in the Chicago newspaper.

If she'll ever fill out this application.

Back off. I'll do it later.

Gee, you are a great artist.

And I bet you'd win that contest.

Bobby, don't touch that.

Don't touch what?

What was that?

Oh, nothing.

Oh, I know it's nothing now, but what was it before?

Cherry, dear, I just had to meet your cousin, the artiste.

Imagine my shock to learn there's someone in your family with talent.

You must be the one and only Margo.

Thank goodness there's only one.

Papa just came from Rockford on the bus.

Bus?

Margo doesn't use buses. She has her own limo.

I was on a bus once.

You were?

Yes. I like living on the edge.

Here you go, girls.

Thank you.

How are things in the bedroom?

The same.

Don't worry.

Bobby's okay.

Did he break my antique mirror?

Well, let's just say you should be real careful for the next seven years.

Hold that look, Mr. Watermark. I've almost finished your sketch. I love a

like yours with lots of characters.

She means wrinkles.

You certainly captured my strength of character and rugged good looks.

But she didn't capture your most prominent feature.

I didn't?

You're cheating me.

Here's yours, Grandma.

Oh, I like it.

Too bad the sketch pad was too small to capture your most prominent feature.

Antique, antique, antique.

Let's go out and get everybody some ice cream.

Especially him.

Come, you, me, ice cream.

Let's go quick.

Wait, Henry, Paul didn't draw a picture of me yet.

She'll draw it when we get back.

Come on, I'm buying.

Come on, Margo, ice cream should interest you.

Because I'm so sweet?

No, because you're a conehead.

You're gonna love this place. They've got a great new flavor.

Strawberry meatloaf.

Wait, Punky.

Can you help me fill out this application?

Sure, we'll do it in the car. Come on. We can't.

I don't want Cherry and Aunt Betty to know.

But they already know about the contest.

Yeah, but they don't know that I can't fill out this application.

But these are simple questions.

Not for me.

Why? Because you're from Rockford?

No. Because I can't read.

You can't read? But you're in seventh grade!

Punky, please, be a friend. Help me with this.

Okay. I guess so.

Oh, great!

I promise you won't tell Cherry or Betty.

It'll be our secret.

Boy, Brandon, I think she caught the real you.

Okay,

maybe the nose is a little large, but you're not exactly a Pekingese.

Great news!

Paula won $200 in the art contest.

Congratulations.

I knew you'd win.

We wanted you to be the first to know, Punky. The other part of the prize was

free art lessons. And she gets started as soon as she enrolls.

Oh?

Will you need help filling out the enrollment form?

No, thanks. I'll do it later.

Why would she need help?

Why don't you ask Paula?

What's she talking about, Paula?

Yeah, Paula. What am I talking about?

Okay.

I guess I can tell you, Cherry, but you can't tell Aunt Betty.

Can't tell her what?

That I can't read.

And I had to help her fill out the application.

You mean you couldn't read it without Punky's help?

How do you get by in school?

I get other kids to do my homework.

I trade them drawings.

That works.

The school... help me back once, but then I got your big for my class, so

passed me.

Paula, you've got to learn how to read.

Yeah, you can't do anything if you can't read. I can draw.

I just made $200, didn't I?

How much have you guys made reading?

Well, nothing.

But you wouldn't have made a dime if I hadn't helped you fill out that

application.

Punky, why are you sticking your nose into my business?

Because I get nosy when I see people I like goofing up.

I'm not goofing up.

I'm really good at drawing, and I'm gonna be an artist.

When I get the time, I'll learn to read.

And when will that be?

I'll get to it.

But if my parents find out now, they'll yank me out of my art classes, and I'll

never get anywhere.

You don't know that.

Cherry, please don't tell him me.

Okay, I won't. If you promise to learn to read... I promise.

Come on, I'll help you fill out the enrollment form. Great.

Cherry?

I'll be right out.

Cherry, I think you're wrong about this.

She's my cousin. I have to help her.

Yeah, but what if she waits till her life's almost over?

Like when she's 30.

Look, she's my cousin. I have to help her.

Yeah, but I don't think we're helping her by hiding the fact that she can't

as well as Brandon.

Sorry, Brandon. No offense.

You're not asking me to rat on my own cousin, are you?

It's not ratting.

Think of how confused she'll be if she doesn't know how to read.

She won't know the difference between ladies' room...

And cattle crossing.

Hooky, you owe me one.

I remember the time you played hooky from school to see a movie.

I didn't squeal on you, did I?

Well, no, you didn't.

I covered for you, because we're friends.

And you threatened to dynamite my teeth.

But I got caught anyway.

That's not the point.

Yes, it is the point.

Paula's going to get caught, too.

Well, I don't want to be the one to tell.

And if you were a real friend, you wouldn't tell either.

Brandon, what do I do now?

Sorry,

Brandon.

Can't sleep?

How'd you know?

I figured it was that or that the cops were holding midnight practice in here.

Sorry, Henry.

I didn't mean to wake you up.

Oh, that's all right.

A problem?

Uh -huh.

Want to tell me about it?

Okay.

I'll tell you.

But you didn't hear it from me.

Get it?

Got it.

Tell me.

I've got a big problem burning my gut.

Oh, it's probably the strawberry meatloaf ice cream.

Henry, this is serious.

Well, now you got me worried.

What is it?

It's Paula.

She can't read.

Not at all?

Maybe a little.

Like a second grader.

My goodness. Does Betty know about this?

No.

That's the problem.

Cherry doesn't want me to rat on Paula.

Oh, you don't have to rat on her.

I don't? No.

I'll do it for you.

Henry.

Do you have to?

We don't have a choice here.

We have to do what's best for Paula.

And this is something Betty has to know.

I guess you're right.

Even if I am going to be known as Punky the Squealer.

Henry.

Are you telling me my niece can't read?

Yes.

I can't imagine anything worse than that.

Try swallowing hot coffee.

I've known that child all her life. Why didn't I see it? Why didn't her mom and

dad see it?

Maybe they just didn't realize.

Paula's artistic talent is so outstanding, they only concentrated on

I guess you're right.

We're all so proud of our children, it's easy for us not to notice their

shortcomings.

Especially if the kid doesn't want you to notice.

It happens all the time with kids around standing in sports.

Yeah, they only know football, basketball.

And if they don't make it in sports, they don't have an education to fall

on. I'm going to call my brother and sister -in -law right now.

Punky's worried about Cherry being mad at her.

Cherry better worry about me being mad at her.

Thanks for telling me, Henry.

Stop running, Bobby!

Bobby!

Boy, this is the toughest babysitting job I've ever had. I like you.

That's because you don't know what a squealer is.

Tell me a story.

Okay, I know a real cute one about a little rabbit.

Gotcha, no rabbits.

Okay, we'll make it a dinosaur.

Once there was a dinosaur named Bobby.

One day, Bobby the dinosaur was eating some chocolate chip cookies.

Yummy, yummy.

Yummy, yummy.

They weighed around 100 pounds each. We're talking heavy cookies.

When suddenly, some giant slime birds floated.

only told Henry.

And he told Aunt Betty, and she told my parents. Now when I get back home, I'm

going to have to have a tutor, and they're going to put me in some reading

school. I went to reading school. It's fun.

Yeah, but no one told on you, Punky.

You ruined my vacation.

No, she didn't, Paula.

Someday you'll realize that this is the best thing that could have happened to

you. I doubt it.

You should be thanking Punky for telling Henry about this. She used a lot of

good sense.

More than you did.

Thanks a lot, Punky.

Cherry, wait a minute. Let me explain.

Paula, I'll be right back.

Don't let him break anything.

I'm going to talk to those two girls.

Tell me your story.

Not right now, Bobby.

I'm in a real bad mood.

But I'll draw a picture of you.

I'll get some paper from Punky's room.

when you called i'm sending somebody right now but what do i do he looks real

sick did you have the bottle your brother drank out of yes i've got it

right here okay now there's a label on it that tells you what to do in case

someone swallows it read it to me read it yes i can't read it is the label worn

off no i can't read you can't read at all

You're swallowed.

It says if swallowed, drink large quantities of milk. Milk! I'll get it!

Oh, it hurts.

Please, Ari!

Don't worry, Bobby.

You're going to be okay.

Well, that was a close call, but Bobby's going to be fine.

You were smart to call 911.

Yeah, but once I got in the phone, I was totally useless.

Boy, was I dumb.

You're not dumb, Paul.

Well, I sure was dumb not to learn to read.

It almost cost me my brother's life.

So, are you going to learn how to read now?

Yup. And you know what I'm going to learn to read first?

What? Every bottle under the sink.

Well, Bobby finished the soup, and now he's off to dreamland, little angel.

Finally, things are back to normal.

This is about as normal as it gets around here.