Original subtitles

Maybe the world is blind or just a little unkind.

Don't know.

Seems you can't be sure of anything anymore.

Although...

Great pictures, Henry.

Thank you.

What are they for?

A little job I'm doing for the police department.

Ooh, this guy's definitely the criminal type.

Who is he?

The chief of police.

I'm shooting posters for the policeman's ball.

language i'm funky brister what's your name oh you don't have a name

then i'm gonna have to name you or else you'll never get mail

i hereby dub thee

pinky the pig

is pork chops.

Now, run along, little girl.

But... Don't you have some shoplifting you need to do?

I'll be right over here, Pinky.

Howdy, folks.

My name is Jimmy John, and I'm here to talk pork.

Now, since my company is brand spanking new, I can help me out with a little

survey. Let me see the hands of everybody here that had ham, bacon, or

for breakfast.

Okay. Now, how many of you are sure that that pig was fit to eat?

Our products are guaranteed to be the freshest, tenderest, tastiest you've

wrapped your lips around. That's why our motto is, what goes down, stays down.

Now, folks, take a look inside the pen here. What do you see?

No, ma 'am, that's not Shelly Winters.

That's a Jimmy John Fries portrait. Right now, this is just 400 pounds of

humongous hog.

But in a few days, it'll be ham baked.

questions. Let me urge you good people to step up here and sample some of our

succulent sausage.

There you go, ma 'am.

There you go.

I mean, they're gonna kill Pinky!

Who?

That sweet, adorable pig out there.

Good grief.

That animal were to keep us in breakfast till you got out of college.

go to the funeral.

Henry! She's gonna be Butcher!

Funky.

That's what happens to pigs.

But Pinky's special.

I had a nice conversation with her.

You'd like her if you got to know her also.

I make it a point never to get emotionally involved.

Especially with a pig.

Don't give up hope, Pinky.

I'll save you.

Okay, open your school book so it looks like we're studying.

Brandon, you wait in the hall. Whistle if anyone comes.

You bring your black clothes?

Yeah.

Gotta help a pig.

Are you talking about Emma Blotsky?

No, I'm talking about a real pig.

Oh, Sharon Fusco.

No, the actual... Tammy Tishman.

Pay attention.

It's a 400 -pound animal with four legs and a curly tail.

But that's a pig.

That's what I've been trying to tell you.

There's a pig in the...

to help it.

Why?

Because if we don't, we'll be killed, put in packages, and sent to stores all

over the city.

Yeah.

Cherry, I know this pig.

Her name is Pinky.

She's real smart.

I hate pigs. They're ugly, filthy, and they have no waistline.

So here's the plan.

We wear our dark clothes, sneak into the mall, and rescue the pig.

Cherry, are you with me?

I guess so. You are my best friend.

Marga?

We're not that close.

Marga, how would you like Richie Von Trump to find out that you're really not

related to the Kennedys?

That's blackmail!

Remember, we're not that close.

so if you need any help... No, thanks. We'll never learn if we don't do it

ourselves.

You're right.

Maybe I'll just hang around and watch.

Uh, Grandma, please. We're trying to work here.

No, you're not. I'm on to you, Scamps.

You are?

You're not studying.

what you're talking about.

You do?

Yes.

Boys.

She caught us red -handed.

Well, you girls want some advice?

No, thanks.

You want to give me some?

No, thanks.

You want me out of here?

It might have something to do with the way you're dressed.

Well, you said bring something black.

I didn't know I had a date with a pig.

Go swim.

That's Pinky. Isn't she cute?

Punky, you could use some rest.

Well, I think she's cute.

How are we going to get her out? Get out of here.

Can't you jump over the fence?

Get real.

She'll end up down in the parking garage.

Uh -oh.

Gate is locked.

Stand aside.

I'll pick the lock.

You know how to do that?

Well... Occasionally, I like to read my mother's diary.

Voila!

Margo, remember when I said you were stuck up, obnoxious and useless?

Yeah. I take back useless.

Hi, Pinky.

We're here to rescue you.

Not by choice.

Look at the sun.

The swine is fine.

Where are you?

I'm over at Video Kingdom.

Want to watch Biker Girls from Mars?

Sure. Tell you what, I'll stop off at Popcorn Kingdom on the way.

Pinky, you're busting out of here.

Daddy, when I was in there, they were sitting around talking about boys.

Oh, they grow up fast.

One day I'll turn around and Punky will be wearing a formal gown, a handsome

young man in a sharp tuxedo. And purple hair.

He will pick her up and whisk her off to the senior prom. And after they've

danced till 8 .30, he'll have her home by 9.

That's right. Tomorrow she goes into the convent.

You sound as though you're getting a cold.

Tomorrow you're getting a bath.

This room smells like a pigsty.

Would you like something to drink?

Coffee? Tea?

Slop?

You stole that thing, didn't you?

Would you believe she followed me home?

No, I wouldn't.

Hunky, you committed a crime.

You know it's wrong to steal.

Stealing is such an ugly word.

Not as ugly as that pig.

She's not ugly.

Besides, can't we think of her as something other than a pig?

Like what? A senator?

No. A pet?

They don't make litter boxes that size.

Pinky. I mean, punky.

Certain animals are raised to provide food for the table.

Not pinky.

Does that mean we're never going to eat bacon anymore?

any bacon I know personally.

You have to look at this in its proper perspective.

How should I put this?

A pig is a pig.

That pig is my friend.

Sweetheart, I know you mean well, but you can't save all the pigs in the

I realize that.

I just want to save Pinky. I can't stand the thought of her being killed.

Honey, we have no choice here.

We have to give Pinky back.

So you do understand that the only reason my daughter took your fine pig is

because she'd grown so fond of it. You know how children are.

I ought to call the police.

There's no reason to involve the pigs.

That's pretty good.

I'll see you in court.

Now, for the last time, hand over my hog.

Good pinky, Punky.

Brandon, is Pinky down with her shower?

The pig took a shower?

Yeah, she wouldn't fit in the tub.

And just watch me.

When you see Pinky, you see a pork product.

When I look at Pinky, I see a friend.

Kid needs glasses.

That's what you call epigmatism.

Well, we gotta get going. What time's the next bus?

Please, Mr. Jimmy John.

I beg you. Please, bear this pig.

Sorry, kid.

But this little piggy's going to the market.

It's just business.

business with other animals. With Pinky, it's murder.

Well, fortunately, I got a good lawyer.

Henry, do something!

Pinky, there's nothing I can do.

If he wants to pass up the money -making opportunity of a lifetime, that's his

business.

Money -making what?

This animal is worth a lot more to you alive than dead.

How do you figure?

Pinky could be your spokes -pig.

Spokes -pig?

Spokes -pig?

What in the name of all that fries is a spokes -pig?

Morris the Cat, Smokey the Bear, Charlie the Tuna.

Yeah, she could be Pinky the Parker.

I can see the TV commercial now.

Jimmy John and his pig, Pinky.

Hey, that's not bad.

I could put the pig in an outfit just like mine. Hat, little tie.

Shoot, you won't be able to tell us apart.

So you won't turn her into bacon?

Not this little gold mine.

No, sir, this is money in the bank. The piggy bank.

Thanks, Mr.

Jimmy John.

Oh, don't thank me.

Thank your great -grandfather.

Thanks, Henry.

You're the smartest man that ever lived.

Hey, when you're right.

started to like Pinky, didn't you?

Well... Come on, admit it.

Okay.

Maybe I'll miss her a little.

Hey, here's a thought.

The kid already likes my pig.

How about if she's not working with me, she stays here with you?