Original subtitles

Mom, can you help me with my homework?

Go on now, it's your dad.

Dad, can you help me with my homework?

Can it wait a while, please? Well, I want to get it done!

Hey, smart guy, help your cousin. Come on, son.

I'm gonna help you. How was school?

Boom! You got this!

The teacher challenged him to a rap contest.

You don't even know it. Then she let him teach the class to rap.

We all got the questions right.

I love that.

We're doing it. Just like a producer taking credit for the artist's work,

I'm telling you, if it don't make dollars, then it don't make sense.

Oh, that's good.

I know it is, Chuck.

Money's all that matters.

Cash over everything.

Well, sure, but what about... Nah, man, nah.

Whatever you want to say, money first.

Then you can just buy everything else.

What about friends and family, though?

You can buy them, too, for the right price.

I wish that was... Stop!

Don't scare me like that, cuz, unless you're trying to get got.

left for the day, and they put me in charge.

That's what.

Stand home alone rules.

For emergencies, call 911.

Or call Grandma.

I'm going with 911.

Don't open the door for anyone.

Who's anyone?

I don't know.

Doors lock.

Duh.

If mom or dad call, answer.

That's right.

Those are the rules.

See, this is my chance to show that I am responsible.

And if I do, I figure mom and dad might let me go to the dance.

That's not going to happen.

You don't know that. But I do, though.

But you don't. But I do. But you don't. But I do. But you don't. But I do.

Charlie! Fine!

Geez, maybe they will.

As I was saying, this is my chance to get on Mom and Dad's good side.

Okay, bet.

But what does it mean for us?

It means that I'm in charge and you two have to do what I say.

And what I say is for you two to...

in these two chairs and not move.

But what if my foot falls asleep?

Ignore it.

What if I have to go to the bathroom?

Hold it.

What if wild dogs get in the house and start chasing us?

Then I hope you got your rabies shots.

Whatever. Wait, wait, wait, wait.

I didn't mean it.

need you guys to stay inside and not burn the house down, okay?

Otherwise, I don't care what you do.

So please, can you just help me on this?

Yeah, okay.

Dylan, sure I got you.

Great.

Thanks. For a price.

You do what I say and help me prove to Mom and Dad that I'm responsible.

Whoa.

Where'd you get all that bread?

It's my allowance.

That can't be your allowance.

It's like a million bucks.

So, how much you offer?

One week's worth of allowance.

Two weeks.

Three. Two.

Deal.

Charlie.

was in charge.

I am.

And I'm telling you to do it. Probably she's telling you to do it.

I think they might have already left anyway.

Hello?

I got a package here for, uh, young Dylan.

Young Dylan.

Someone who knows my rap name. It must be fan mail.

It'd be a lot of fan mail, but here's a crazy idea. How about you take the

package and you can find out?

Uh, just leave it outside the door, please.

Can't. Need a signature to leave it.

Whoa,

whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What are you doing?

Fitting my package. What does it look like I'm doing? You can't.

Why not?

Yeah, why not?

Come on, Dylan. We don't open the door for strangers.

People call me Rome, but Romeo works. My mama calls me that. So does my granny.

Dude.

not looking, then I'm going to take it anyway.

Mm -hmm.

Well, then I guess I'm just going to stay right here.

Mm -hmm.

I shouldn't have told you that.

Mm -hmm. Come on, do it. Come on.

Whatever. Come on, chocolate.

All right, look.

I got a plan to get past Rebecca so I can get my package from that delivery

dude. But I'm going to need your help.

Yes, sir.

I can help you out.

Don't! I appreciate that.

What's in it for me, though?

Wait, what?

Oh, word, Lucy.

Oh, I'm teaching you well.

Too well.

All right, so what's it going to cost me?

make the beds this weekend.

Deal. Aw, I should have said two weekends.

Don't worry about it, little grasshopper. You're still learning.

What's the plan?

Wow.

That?

Intense.

Desperate times call for desperate measures.

All you gotta do is distract your sister, and I'll handle the rest.

My middle name is Distraction.

That's my man, bro.

Can you please let me deliver this package?

Uh, no can do, Romeo.

Did you just drop a rock on me?

My cousin will hear you.

Just read the note.

Go to the back?

Then why?

Just go to the back. I'll meet you there in a minute.

Well, if you're going to just tell me, then why'd you have to drop a note rock?

Well, where is it?

Around back.

Where do you think?

Right. I mean, obviously.

But, like, which way is faster?

Is there a gate?

Is there a dog?

Do you need another rock note?

Go to the back door.

I'll meet you around back.

about going for my package.

Romeo probably went home already anyway.

So... Anyway... I'm just gonna get me a

little something something from the kitchen.

Little grub.

Here, move.

Look out, man.

I'm ready to get my package.

I'm sorry, Dylan. I can't let you do that.

What are you doing, Chuckles?

You shut up!

I told you, we can't open the door with my parents not here.

What?

I just want my package!

What man?

Hey, yo, Dylan.

I'm here. Open up.

Sorry, Mr. Romeo, but we can't open the door.

Well, come on.

You don't even know what it is or who it's from.

Uh, it says it's from a Darlene Young.

Dylan, you are not opening that door.

Hello?

Hello?

Dang!

I knew I should have gone to computer school.

Kind of nice.

so I can deliver this package and go home.

Why do you have a hose?

Now, you want out the store, she wants to stop you.

And whoever holds the hose, holds the power!

So, let's talk money.

All right, that's it.

But would you please just sign this so I can go?

looks on people's faces when i deliver them gifts i mean pretty much i'm a swag

down dude you know what just give me the dang paper man

seriously

i really love how you guys are so careful yeah please

don't report me

You signed this, Dylan Young. You actually should have signed it, Young.

go.

Yeah, okay, go.

Ugh.

All right.

Okay, um... Young, I think he's gone. You can open the door now.

you all saw?

This package is for me.

Rebecca, how many times have we told you not to open the door when we're not

here? Mom, I tried to tell him. He doesn't listen.

Well, when we leave you in charge, it's your responsibility to make him listen.

Well, that's dumb because that's impossible.

You know what?

Go to your room. I'll be up in a minute.

But Mom!

Excuse me.

Not now, Charlie.

I mean, these kids just... Charlie, to your room.

Hey, hey, hey, stop.

You heard her, right? Let's go.

Dylan, what were you thinking?

The guy showed up with a package for me.

Dylan, I don't care who showed up with what for who. You do not open that door

for people we don't know.

His name was Romeo.

Romeo?

I'm talking to Charlie and Rebecca.

You handle him.

Look, Uncle Miles, I'm sorry I broke the rules.

I am.

But the guy said the package was from my mom.

Dylan, that doesn't matter.

I know, but I just haven't heard from her.

And I really wanted to know what it was. I thought maybe... Listen, look, Dylan,

I know, but we discussed this.

But what if someone stole it?

Stole it?

Stole it?

What kind of neighborhood do you think we're in?

Okay.

Thanks for not punishing me. Oh, you getting punished?

Most definitely you getting punished.

Just need time to think of something bad enough.

Ian!

So, this, uh, this huge thing is really from your mom, huh?

Yeah, see?

All right, well, let me help you get inside.

The

reason

why your dad and I left you in charge was because we thought you could handle

your brother and Dylan.

Mom, I tried.

That delivery guy.

Romeo.

Romeo, shut up all the packets for Dylan and Dylan won't let it go. Hey,

Rebecca. I told him ten times not to open the door. Rebecca.

I even offered him my allowance.

But he did it anyway.

Rebecca. You're never going to trust me again.

Rebecca.

No.

I trust you.

And I really appreciate your effort.

But, Mom. Wait, wait, what? Really?

Really. I talked to Charlie, and he told me how hard you tried.

And Lord knows how hard it can be to manage those two boys sometimes.

Maybe if you cook something, we could wipe them out.

Oh, excuse you.

What? Sorry, Mom.

But desperate times call for desperate measures.

That sounds pretty wrong.

Uh... Saved by the bell. I mean, uh... I don't think I want to know.

What are you doing?

I put the headsets on.

You want to?

I put the headsets on, okay?

You want to sleep?

I see what you mean.

I'm going to just let you know, though, you ain't got no rhythm.

Coming.