Original subtitles

The rich and the ruthless.

Brought to you by Tricker and Cramble and the WNB Network.

Delivering truth, not fluff.

We keep you clinging to a cliff while inspiring you during commercials to keep

your laundry white and those chocolate cakes moist.

20 years of aspirational escapism from your own damn dirty problems.

So how are you settling in, Bobby?

Pretty good.

Yeah, the Beverly Hills Trickster and Trample offices are spectacular.

And I love LA a lot.

But wow, what a party town.

I mean, I don't think I could live here full time.

Like, how would someone get any business done?

Well, that's just it. A lot don't.

That's why it's important to remember how you do anything is how you do

everything.

Right. I'm so proud of you, Bobby.

And you know, I never get to see Veronica that much these days anymore,

at night.

You know, she works almost as hard as I do.

It's just a compliment, honey.

Besides,

I can never pass up a good meal.

Well, you're always welcome.

Thank you, sir.

Well, Mrs.

Barron should be joining us.

She should.

Where's your mother?

She's at ballet class, Daddy.

Again? Yeah, she wants to do her best for the...

fan club talent show your mother was a dancer i love ballet i'm more of

a ailey debbie allen man myself did i say something wrong never mind max he's

just moody is that what you call it so you're both on board with your mother

doing this ballet routine that listen face it it wouldn't matter what mom did

okay you're just not on board with her being back on the show no for good

and how did you lose that yacht rental huh

I got busy, okay? Stuff happens when you're managing an army full of crazy

actors, and I'm developing stuff on my own. Can we change the subject, please?

I told you to book that yacht months ago. Look, all that matters is I got a

better yacht, and it's for the cruise tomorrow, and I have this old -school

theater on the deck below.

Tomorrow? Mm, tomorrow.

And thanks to Bobby for advertising the cruise on the Trick or Trouble website.

We're almost filled up, Daddy.

Oh, thanks, Bobby.

Yeah, I'm happy to help. It was actually Veronica's idea?

Yes, it was.

Hmm, should have known.

You know, Matt, I think we might have a lot in common.

You think so?

Yeah, no offense, Mr. Berenger, but no matter what I do, it never seems to be

good enough for my dad.

Well, I probably just want to toughen you up so you'll be ready to fill his

shoes one day.

Such business can be nasty.

Yeah. And ruthless.

Being hard on family.

You didn't say that again. You know, Dad's idea of a dinner conversation is

research and development over steak and potatoes.

And quarterly earnings over quiche and quinoa.

Exactly. He'd say there's only two ways to create more wealth. Work for it or

steal it.

Well, there's truth in that.

You got to get dirty before you get clean.

You know, Dad wouldn't agree, but I'd say work hard.

Play harder.

You know, that's the one thing.

Actually, the two things that I actually agree with him on.

Who is your father now, Bobby? Well, he's in Hong Kong negotiating on our new

factory. Always expanding.

I look forward to meeting him and your mother.

Yeah, they're divorcing. Oh, sorry to hear that.

Bobby, why haven't you said anything to me?

You know, anybody can get married these days, but it's the tenure that's the

real test. Max!

No, no, no, no. He's right. But, you know, whoever I'm going to marry, it's

going to be for life.

Wow, that's what I call a sparkler. This calls for a toast.

To Veronica and Bobby. To Veronica.

Matt, you know it's bad luck to toast with water. Put it down.

My bad.

Sorry.

Daddy.

It's a lovely couple.

Oh, thank you, sir.

Oh, Daddy.

Bobby's going to be joining us on the cruise.

Is that all right, Mr. Barringer?

Well, the more the merrier.

So has Veronica met your parents yet?

Max. No, not yet.

But she will.

Actually, would you mind excusing me? Where's your bathroom?

Max, why don't you sit there?

Show Bobby where the restroom is.

Go.

Daddy,

Max better not blow this for me.

Don't worry, honey. I won't let him.

You better not, because I'm going to kill him.

What? You know what.

Someone needs to mind his own business.

I am.

Don't you think you're rushing into this a little bit too fast?

And when did you become head of the family, huh? When did you become head of

household? Wow, what a nice little place you have here.

That was quick.

So, you were saying, Max, that Yacht is unrivaled in reputation?

Like no other?

It better be, because this is a huge press event for our show.

Yes, and we don't need any messes.

We want our fans to have a flawless experience.

I mean, I got this, right? I mean, what could go wrong?

I'm so sorry, guys, but it looks like the date for tomorrow's cruise on the

Trickster and Trample website is wrong.

What? Yeah, it's off by a month.

Excuse me?

Yeah, I don't know. Maybe somebody hacked the site or something.

I told you this was a bad idea.

Too late to cancel now. You're right, Daddy.

Maybe we can just spin it as if it were by invitation only and delay the cruise

by a month.

You're a genius, honey.

Yes, I am.

And I will pay for everything.

Okay? It's the least that Trickster and Tramble can do.

I am so sorry, Mr. Berenger.

I'm sorry, Daddy.

I'm sorry.

I sound just gonna love my ring.

I love it. I love you.

I love you.

The practice makes perfect.

Well, that's true. Practice does make perfect.

So, Madam Bushkina said I still have it. I should pay and change. I should pay.

I mean, I had it.

So good.

Let's keep it simple for the show, all right, darling? That's a surprise.

All right. But seriously, Kitty, we really need to squash this DNA testing

business with Veronica. Oh, no, I'm all over that.

And I told Veronica I want her to start seeing Dr. Wagner right away for her

anger issues. But right now, breathe.

All I can think about are the three carrots on her left finger. Did you see

canary diamond? Oh, my God. I know, I know. I thought you were going to pull

that poor girl's finger off.

Oh, stop. I'm just excited.

How was your day?

Ah, well, farm bell for the friendly skies.

Phillip wants to be a vampire again.

Of course.

Calista's dungeon storyline is a wrap, and I gave Willie a love interest.

Really? Mm -hmm. Wow.

You did have a day.

Still can't figure out how Bobby got the cruise dates wrong on his company

website, though.

Oh, honey, you know, he's...

He's got a lot on his mind, right?

He's human.

He's a busy man.

Yeah, I don't know.

I tell Max and Veronica over and over, never trust outsiders to do our work.

now look, we'll be lucky if we have two fans on board.

But look at the bright side, honey. We have a smaller crowd, more manageable,

and congratulations, our plan finally worked.

You mean your plan.

And Bobby's coming on the cruise, too.

Splendid, see?

We think things are being done to you, but they're being done for you. Well,

what's that supposed to mean?

It means that we'll be able to have more time with Bobby without distraction.

Well, you're right. Of course I'm right.

At least Veronica will be set for life. That's one consolation out of this whole

scheduling fiasco.

And I know two of the best wedding planners in the industry.

Kitty, let's wait until there's an official wedding announcement, okay? Are

serious? Good wedding planners get snapped up just like that.

And remember, the bride's parents have to pay for the wedding.

Dumb rule.

You didn't say that when my parents picked up our wedding town.

Woman, are we going to fight or are we going to go to bed, huh?

Because you barely have anything left in the tank as it is these days.

That's because of all the training, honey.

Look at your feet, huh?

We've gotten all busted up after our paperless surgery.

I know.

But practice makes perfect.

Well, that's true. Practice does make perfect.

I'm going to get out of these clothes.

Oh, yeah.

And I'm going to go to bed.

No, no, no. What?

Rest. Wait a minute.

Kitty. Kitty.

You did good, kid.

Very.

I hate wearing this wire.

We are not done with our surveillance.

When Barringer gets back from his little excursion, we expect you to get more

information out of him.

Right. Find out who his clients are.

All of them.

And keep the paintbrush moving as usual.

Understand?

Yes, sir.

I don't know how much longer I can keep wearing this wire.

You don't have a choice if you want immunity.

And don't watch your mom go into prison if she comes out of that coma.

Right.

Look, it's been a long day. Can I go home?

Yep.

Bobby, canary diamonds and free carrots?

Mi mama se moriria.

Figures your boy would muck up our cruise.

So it's a PR nightmare.

No one's perfect.

You and I could have made the same mistake.

You keep telling yourself that.

will still show up from our other advertising campaign.

Relax.

You better hope so.

This little arrangement with your boy Bobby is going to sink.

Shh. Keep your voice down.

Mommy and Daddy are upstairs.

Besides, Bobby is exactly the distraction that I need.

We're getting married, and that's final.

Now get away from me.

I want to admire my ring in private.

Besides, there aren't enough Hail Marys to absolve us of our sins.

Honey, I got my roller skates for the talent show.

I'm all wrapped up so I can lose weight and be so fine. And I'm ready.

And I'm ready for what I'm going to get.

Randall?

I'm never going to stop.

I just want a normal husband.

Oh, the pastor bell said to be compassionate.

But, oh, God knows without that sleep apnea machine,

little Randall's tongue would fuck back into his throat

and he would just die.

And then I would be in control of everything.

Allison, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's just thinking, thinking.

Don't think that way.

Randall, you worked so hard today.

Breathe and repeat.

Your husband has a plan.

So you sure you want me to go home? Mm -hmm.

That's what you want? Yes.

You stay. We don't sleep. I need to sleep.

No, you don't. Yes, I do.

Gosh,

I hate that this whole cat's out to ride down to the marina to see other babes.

That's just so stupid.

I'm kind of looking forward to it.

Yeah? Not like Gran.

She's been back for weeks in Mississippi.

God, and then her blood pressure shot up, and the doctor said she had to stay

back.

Too bad.

Yeah. But you never know.

Things can change.

Whoa.

Ivy. Hi, Derek.

You're working late.

I live here now.

Didn't Calista tell you?

She does?

For now.

Let's just thank you.

Are you going on a cruise with us?

Oh, I wouldn't miss it. Right, Calista?

Right.

It's my first time. I just hope I don't get seasick.

Well... I guess I'll just leave you two little lovebirds alone.

Oh, Eric, what is that cologne you're wearing?

It's a secret.

Oh, I'm good at keeping secrets.

Good night, Ivy.

Bye, Eric.

Bye.

Bye.

Wow.

I've heard of helping a girl out, but what are you, like, Mother Teresa now?

Ha ha. No, I'm serious.

This mentoring thing is for real, right?

Sometimes one is led to do it.

Like I was led to you?

Maybe.

Well,

you inspired me to be better, so... Speaking of inspiration... Yeah?

Ivy's kind of come out of that shell, hasn't she?

More than you know.

You know, you helping that little girl's dream come true is really making me

love you more.

Oh, God.

You trying to kick me out? You said you didn't want me to go. You gotta go.

I don't wanna go.

I gotta get some sleep.

I hate to see you go.

Ooh, I love it when you walk away.

Yeah, I'm leaving. Give it to me.

Come on.

Okay. You know what I'm saying? Okay.

You know you don't. Your body's saying one thing.

Derek.

I'm leaving.

Lock me in.

I'm going home.

Save me a seat on the bus.

I'm going. Bye -bye. Bye, baby.

Bye. I love you.

I love you, too.

So how'd I do?

Take off my robe.

Oh, I thought we were sharing.

Listen here, you little... Say it.

I know you want to.

You know what, Ivy?

I'm not even going there with you.

When were you going to tell me?

Tell you what?

Don't play dumb.

I know about your little contract with the soap.

Oh, so you found out that I'm going to be playing your daughter on the show.

Ain't that deep.

I believe that's what you call art imitating life?

More like con art.

You weaseled your way into my life, and if you think that I'm going to let you

continue to play me for a fool, oh.

What are you going to do about it? Tell everybody that you gave me up for

adoption so you could pursue your acting career?

Really? Try to public relations yourself out of that one, mommy dearest.

Don't call me that.

Okay, um, how about just plain old ma?

Yeah. That has a nice ring to it, and you better get used to it, too.

Max says I have that X factor, and that I'm gonna blow up.

This soap gig is just a small little stepping stone.

You said that you weren't gonna bring more drama into my life than you already

have. Oh, shut up, Calista. You sound pathetic.

Really, me bringing more drama? Have you just stopped and thought about all the

drama you've caused me with the abandonment and the foster care?

Have you?

What do you want?

Mo' money.

What? I already gave you all the... That was just some small little pocket

change and you know it.

If you want to buy my silence, it's going to cost you a whole lot more.

Ivy, I told you, I don't have that kind of money.

Well, get some payday loans. I don't care what you do.

I need some grip like now.

Tightening my weave and getting my nails in a cup of money.

How much?

Let me sleep on it.

I'll let you know.