Original subtitles

The Rit and the Ruthless, brought to you by Cricker and Cramble and the WNB

Network, delivering truth, not fluff.

We keep you clinging to a cliff while inspiring you during commercials to keep

your laundry white and those chocolate cakes moist.

20 years of aspirational escapism from your own damn dirty problems.

I'll have to listen to Willie talk about his bygone days with Ben Vereen.

Now he was almost shaft.

Base cloth hanging off of his back pocket.

I know it's gang -related.

Just like I know the Berenders are trying to write me off the show, I can

it like a bad hemorrhoid.

Oh, Philip, darling.

I think we need to get started because it's getting very late.

And I have to be at the show very early tomorrow.

You're right. You're right. Thank you for coming in such short notice, Fern.

You're the best.

Oh, Philip, for you, dear, anything.

Now, just let my fingers do their magic.

Philip, do you think we could do what we did last week?

I will be gone by...

Now that the network knows Augustus has health issues.

We can cut the dead weight.

Slow down, but roll first.

We got to get Berenger to sell.

And how do we do that? My ginger snap.

Leave it to me.

Leave it to you.

You got it.

I'm going to make us very rich.

Very rich.

I like very rich.

Okay, enough.

Relax.

Okay? There you are.

Cheers.

Oh, toast.

You're so ruthless.

And I love it.

So... Derek, listen.

My casual thing is cooling off, but...

I want to talk to you about something a little more permanent.

Whoa, swerve. Pump your brakes, baby.

I mean, Jamaica was real cool. I had a great time. We back home now.

I was just kind of helping you work out some of that stress.

You know what I'm saying?

Listen, I'm going to be 100 with you.

I'm in demand right now.

I mean, you was lucky to catch your brother here tonight.

I mean, just keep it. What?

That's not funny.

Why are you looking at me so hard? I was going to knock you out.

I was.

It's not funny.

You guys, Team Z is rarely wrong.

How do you like cooking it?

You haven't made it till these nincompoops write this kind of crap

kid. Back in 62, L .A. Confidential printed that I had a three -way with

Kennedy and Sammy Davis Jr. All lies.

It was Peter Norford and Harry Belafonte.

Oh.

Is it true?

No. Is it? No.

Then why are you on TMZ? Same reason.

Can we get me the entire time we've been together?

You think I need to lie about that trick? Come on.

From where I'm standing, you got a hell of a lot more to lie about.

Excuse you?

Well, I don't know. Augustus pucks you out of nowhere and makes you a damn

but you ain't giving him no pussy.

Save the drama for the camera.

The only thing Augustus gets is me taking the show off cancellation watch.

That's all he gets.

Come on, Dee.

Let's go to my dressing room and run lines and work off some stress.

Like you always say, crush and make a pipe burn.

Do you lose it every time?

Clifton.

I want back into the show, Augustus, and if you don't support me on this, I am

going to make your life a living hell.

Kitty, for the last time, I'm not sleeping with Clifton.

Gotham pipes make a mess all the time. Now drop it. I will not drop it. If I

find out that you've been sleeping with Clifton or any other starlet on the

show, it'll be the last time you do it married to me. So help me God. Do you

understand me, Augustus? I am coming back to the show. I've never been more

in my life. I'm coming back to the show to act and to keep an eye on you.

Are you listening to me, Augustus? No, because you keep talking crazy.

I can't believe I gave away my passion. And if I'm honest with myself, I began

drinking because I was so dag on board.

Oh, oh, okay. So now me giving you the world caused you to drink? Boy, your

is really showing tonight, Kitty.

Good.

Let it.

Let it drag for all I care. I'm just so happy to get all this shit off my chest.

You better not fight me on this, Augustus, because if you do, it will be

battle you will not win.

Well, if we're not careful, we won't have a show to fight about.

All right, I'm all worked up now.

All right, I'm in the mood now.

I'm in the mood to do the nasty. Put the magazine away.

You're on top tonight. You're on top.

Okay. Good.

You want that foot over here? Yeah, like that. All right. And keep it to the

left. Keep it to the left.

All right.

Left.

And to the left.

To the left.

And faster.

And there.

To the left. And stay.

Right there.

And safer and harder to live!

To live! To live!

To live!

To live! And live!

To live!

What's the little people all the honor of being invited back here to WBN

after being kicked out?

I'm glad to see your sense of humor is still intact, given your medical

condition. What medical condition?

Come on, Augustus.

As I understand it, a preamble to a major stroke.

How the hell did you know? It doesn't matter how I found out. You should have

informed me. I could have protected you from the network.

But now, everybody knows.

Need I remind you, you just signed a very lucrative licensing agreement with

Lucrative, my ass. You cut our licensing fee by 40%.

Yes, because your show has continued to decline in ratings. And given the fact

we've canceled the other soap operas, you should consider yourself lucky yours

is still on the air.

However, if you're not up to snuff to continue acting as the creative voice

the program... I'll be running my show long after you've pushed your last

pencil. There's no need to be hostile about it.

On behalf of the network, we would like to purchase The Rich and the Ruthless.

So you and Kitty...

Can retire gracefully.

You don't have to desperately hang on.

Filming out of your home?

This deal would instantly make you substantially richer.

Naturally, in absentia, you'll take a lesser position as senior executive

producer, creator emirate, but have no creative control.

How many times do I have to tell you my show is not for sale?

Let's not be hasty and hear Edith out.

I mean...

You are a brilliant businessman.

How can it hurt to look at the offer? There's no need to look at an offer when

there's nothing for sale.

Now, Edith, I don't know who your spy is, but let's get something straight.

I have no intention of deferring power to you or anyone else. So tell your

people no means no.

Augustus, turn the page.

Maybe you should just sleep on it.

Now, how would you know what it is, Randall, sitting over there, huh?

I was just... Gonna say.

Augustus, I know you said your health is not in question.

But I would like to remind you that stress is a number one killer.

And churning out 64 pages a day from your home, that's not an easy task.

And then, of course, there's Kitty to think about.

You can say that again.

No one works harder in entertainment than the soap opera industry.

Even porn takes a back seat.

Why don't you talk to Veronica and Kitty?

And if you decide to sell, we'll be waiting.

With open arms.

What's the matter with you, man? Come on. This is your get -out -of -jail

card. You know what? I got something really nice coming for us any second

I'm good.

The strippers are here.

No, no, no. Why?

Yo,

yo. They brought us a top -dollar grade -A pole dancer this time.

Excuse me?

Oh, hello. My name is Javier de la Vazquez, star telenovela, mi amor.

Demasiado caliente para ti.

Veronica, what are you doing here?

Do you have a minute?

You know this chica? This chica has a name. It's Veronica Barringer.

As in the Barringers that cut my chin. Oh, well, I will leave you two alone,

if you ever need an international superstar...

Please, don't hesitate to call my agent.

What's with the frat party?

Hey, Calista left me.

After you accused her of sleeping with my father, Emmy emailed that dirt. So

that you know the truth, can you please find Calista? Because we're going to

need you both to help us save our show.

That's what you want me to do.

So we can't afford to lose our star couple, and that's you and Calista,

Calista?

This is what we're going to do.

Mercy, I found out that you are more fine in real life than you are on my

The Rich and the Ruthless. Now, baby, relax.

Now, I've got to ask you a question. Uh -huh? Was that the real you on that

beach?

Or was it for a shout?

That was me.

Well, now I'm so glad that all them nasty rumors about you and my grandbaby

dying down.

Yeah, me too.

You think she'll be back anytime soon?

Well, who cares?

Any second now. Now, you know what?

You are my favorite leading man.

After Willie Turner.

On my story.

Now, baby, look here. Can we take a selfie? Because I want to thank my

my Bible study. Let me help you with that. Okay. All right. Well, see, on my

Bible study, everybody back home, take that picture so I can tell them in

Mississippi. See, look at that. That is beautiful.

Oh, isn't this nice and cozy?

Oh, baby.

Hi, sugar.

Hi, Graham.

Come here, baby. Yes, ma 'am. If you don't tap it, I will.

Graham! Oh, Derek, it was so nice meeting you. I'm going back to

soon, and I do hope I see you again.

Sooner than you think, Graham.

Oh, I'm going to have to get my lunch. Got you.

Thank you, sugar boy.

All right. You're going to talk later, Graham.

I love you. Love you, too.

Aren't you full of surprises?

You're blocking my calls.

Before you start, my grandma taught me never try to keep a man who doesn't want

to be kept, so there's that. I never cheated on you.

I know everything.

You know what hurt, Derek? That you actually believed the gossip.

I believe the worst because I've done it myself.

Hey.

You don't need me to do it.

You just make me crazy. You make me crazy. You know that.

I'm sorry.

Why is Veronica texting me?

I can't deal with her right now.

I'll text her back later.

And it may be too late.

What?

I got this. Thanks.

Thick? Like, what do you... Thick how?

I don't know. Veronica didn't really say.

He just may have to sell the soap to the network before he gets a chance to move

to Jamaica.

Okay, and we're going to Jamaica? What?

That's what Veronica said.

Derek, when did all this happen? Where was I?

Look, all I know is Randall was gunning for executive producer at the Barrington

film. No, that can't happen. Hell no. Exactly.

Let me tell you that I'm Veronica's plan.

Yeah, yeah.

Today is truly a historic day.

National Broadcast Network is purchasing the rich and the ruthless.

Save the orations, Edith.

There's no need to be testy. I'm sorry, but my dad's getting ready to sign up

for my birthright.

Veronica, I know you're hurt, but this is your dad's decision.

It sure is.

And a very, very smart decision, I must say. And what would you know about...

Smart decision, Zita. You only come out to L .A. from New York when you want a

photo op or for acquisitions, though.

Your emotions are running high.

Why don't we get the paperwork signed so I can get the contracts back to legal,

shall we?

Dad, please don't do this.

Excellent.

Oh, Kitty.

What?

The network has no intention of bringing your character blue filibuster. What? I

was promised. The only thing I promised was that you would no longer have

creative control. Why don't you send your resume to casting? Veronica, the

network is always looking for bright, young, articulate minorities.

I don't know what it is about you people. You work so hard, and then you

it. Just like that.

Let's see, first there was...

Black TV entertainment, Johansson Publishing.

I even own a condo in Harlem.

I mean, northern Manhattan.

Veronica, I can assure you once I take the reins as executive producer, I might

just keep a little spot for you.

I wouldn't work for you if you were the last hack in Hollywood.

Oh, Ronnie, it's just business.

Don't call me Ronnie. And why are you here?

Why wouldn't I be here? I am the star of The Rich and the Ruthless.

Okay. And now I am married to the new executive producer.

And I'm one of your mother's dearest friends, right, Kitty? Are you, Allison?

Yes. Because when I think of a friend, I think of someone who has my back.

Someone who supports me, not someone who takes advantage of my weaknesses for

personal gain.

That's despicable.

What's too late?

What's too late?

Augustus, you saw the... I'm calling security to both have you taken off the

premises. Do you understand that? You have to go through me first.

I can be arranged. No, no.

You don't have the authority to fire anyone on my show, Randall.

Yes, sir. Oh, okay. Yours, yeah.

I'm in charge now. In charge.

Did you get that in writing?

There's a light And you can't feel it

Burning bright

One

together by the fire In a private shadow

show.

Just as long as you see me to be my dear.