Original subtitles

Yeah, all our dreams are dead and buried.

But sometimes we wish the sun would just explode.

And when God comes and calls us to his kingdom.

Yeah, we'll take you sons of bitches when we go.

It's us.

We're here, just like every Sunday since you passed, to pay our disrespect and

disregard.

What's that you say?

You ignoring me? Well then, I ignore you too.

I miss you, Gaga, and I hope you're up in heaven. No, no, no. Leo, hit the

music. Come on, everybody.

Thanks on your grandpappy's grave.

It's what he wouldn't have wanted. So damn it, do it.

This is the morning period end, anyway.

When the herd is gone, pass me the whole milk. I'm going to drop me a big old

throat oyster right here on the word beloved.

Damn you, generic headstone template.

Hell, you lucky we couldn't afford to write how we actually felt.

All that sub -bitch left me.

with a bunch of damn teeny -weeny beansies -weensies.

Didn't he know?

Always keep three months' salary in the damn bank.

Daddy, I know you're upset, but I found a buyer for these on the Internet.

And you got Spunky Duck and Puffy Penguin, right, with all the tags still

If you ever get this penguin, it'll be soaking my blood, because you have to

kill me for it.

Blood thing.

That wouldn't be mint condition then, would it? No, no, don't you worry about

that. He's just speaking in hyperbole.

This deal ain't happening today, is it? Some days are bad.

Well, I just got to finesse it a little bit.

You want to invest? I mean, why not buy real estate? They ain't making no more

land. And they ain't making no more of these teeny -weeny -beensy -weensies

either, Denny. The company's out of business.

Damn it, Granny.

Will you stop with the dreams of getting finger -banged by old Terry Bradshaw

and Hooper? It's me, son.

Gaga Peepat.

Gaga Peepat?

Daddy?

What the hell?

You some sort of Jedi master now?

No, son. I'm a ghost.

That's why I've been making them ooze back here. I come back here to make

amends. The only amends I'm making is mending this fence between us.

Thick of finding to keep you out of my sumbitching dreams.

Well, that's too late for that. I done built a wall on top of the fence to

out your brain mind.

So I ignored you first. Well, I done cut a window in that wall so you can see me

pre -ignoring you before you pre -ignorify me. So there you go.

I guess I deserve that. You deserve that and then some.

Whoa, now. I don't deserve the then some part. Here's a quarter.

Go back to 1995 when pay phones exist and call somebody in 1995.

Who gives a damn?

Give me some more monies. Pay phones were 35 cents back then. Well, here's

another dime then.

I got you again. I got your 35 cents now. I got you again.

Because I don't recognize no American monies. Not while we got a Kenyan in

office. Give me some more monies. Now I got to call someone. Who cares in 1995?

Long distance in another country. Who cares?

Well, I...

to, but all I got to my name is a bunch of damn stuffed -ass zoo critters.

Daddy, who you talking to? Shut up. He's talking.

Continue. Hold on to those now. That's going to provide y 'all with financial

stability. Not when they on fire, they don't. Oh, hold up. What are you doing?

Making my damn point.

We ought to buy for those.

Them was my daddy's, and now they're mine.

Daddy, Gaga P -Pap is gone.

Well, I'm glad, because I don't never need him in my damn life no more, and I

never, Never, never again. With all them double negatives, you actually just

said you need him in your life forever again.

So I did.

Freud, you magical son of a bitch.

Son, let's get out of this house far and talk a spell.

Daddy, what's heaven like?

What's what now?

Heaven. You know, the carrot at the end of the rainbow that keeps me from

murdering every damn thing in my sight.

Maybe they'll send that train of angels for my soul someday.

I'm just waiting.

That's why I want you to do right by God while you're alive.

I think somebody's smoking. Somebody ought to get Granny out of there, right?

Who put this bar across the door? It's her time.

It ain't a surprise, but it still ain't easy.

I'm alive.

Hey, let's do us some crimes.

That sounds like fun. Danny, who you talking to? Shut up. He's talking.

Why is the door locked?

What's going on here?

These happenings, they're beyond my comprehension.

Nature's mysteries are acting out, I reckon.

What is this?

I shall issue a plague upon your people. I can't plague nobody. I only do

invisible stuff.

Ah, damn it.

Then, snuff display.

To the floor with you.

Yeah, I am the sun king.

Sun king? I thought this was nature's mistress.

Nature's mysteries? Whop him upside the head.

The unexplained.

Nature's mysteries. Let me do it now.

I am the sun king.

My boy's the sun king, y 'all.

Nature's mysteries, baby.

She thinks it was done with magic, and I've done it with my hands.

Look at him. He's just carrying it on like he's talking to somebody. All

He's just flirting.

Let's go hit the bank now.

Yeah, let's take that bank down.

The bank?

Yeah, that's a fool's errand.

Your daddy ain't got no money in that bank.

We ain't gonna make the same mistakes as the last time, though. I don't plan to.

I'm gonna wear a mask this time and not yell out my name so much.

All right, everybody down on the floor.

Pay no attention to this here floating pantyhose.

I can't get through this vault, boy. My pantyhose is stuck.

Well, take it off, then.

Hard stuff don't go through walls.

I got the money.

The money's hard.

Hard stuff don't go through walls. I can't get the money. Give me that damn

No, no, daddy, no.

No, daddy.

No, daddy. I'm going to go and get the monies.

Damn it, I can't get the monies.

I tried to tell you. Hard stuff don't go through the wall.

Well, then we're going to kill the monies. Make me some ghost monies.

here to go through the walls. That's a good idea. Do that.

Damn it. The gun won't come through.

Hard stuff don't go through the wall.

Kill the gun. Make it a ghost gun.

Here.

Gun.

You son of a... What about the boy?

Oh, dang it. The boy's hard. Hard stuff don't go through walls, dumbass.

Rusty ought to swallow the dead gun ghost. Then he shoots the money. Then we

shoot him. Make him a ghost gun.

Then how are we going to spend ghost money?

We'll kill the damn stores.

Use your head, old man.

Why, Daddy? Why'd you do that?

Because I want the money.

He can't hear you. See all them brains on the wall?

Is that what that is?

Them's yours.

No, Daddy, you shut your damn brains out.

What the? No!

Shoes on the other foot now, ain't it, bitch?

Leave me in the burning house, will you, boy?

Oh, no, Rusty. Oh, this is so sad.

But your daddy just made his wishes clear to me. He said, pull the plug,

Living a life like a fruit ain't no life at all.

It's vegetable, Granny. Yeah, those people should die, too.

I called the truck. Oh, the truck, then. Come on, Rusty.

Let's let nature take its course on this mother... Oh, I can't let you do that,

Granny. Step away from the plug, boy.

Go. I'll stay here all night if I got to. You can't be everywhere at once.

You ever hear the rolling brown out?

Some of these old fugitives, you never know when they just come out.

Ah, now.

No, no, no. That young 'un's got a lot of love for you. Keep a gove and forget

him. It must be nice to have a son like that in your corner. I bet.

I guess.

I could take it or leave it. Yeah, me too.

Well, I gotta get.

Red Jesus over there says it's time to ride up to heaven on a train of angels.

Oh, no, I'm sorry. I actually said train of dildos. It was dildos.

Grab a seat.

These seats are pointy and purple.

Wait a minute. I didn't know heaven was downward.

He's gonna be in a diaper if he ever wakes up.

Who wants to deal with...

life, too.

I want that boat.

You ain't having that boat. Hell no. The boat is mine. You don't even use it.

That sumbunchin' boat is mine. She just drives it around for show. Oh, hell, she

can't hear me. It's a show boat. The boat is mine, I said. Yeah, the boat

be mine.

Oh, my.

Daddy? Daddy? Daddy?

I think he's finally ready to let these go.

These aren't quite meant to do.

Yeah, I reckon we could knock a few bucks off that initiative.

I mean, we need to stick with that original price we already talked about.

I'm sorry, I just can't accept this.

Well, see, Daddy's saying that all sales are final.

Well, I hadn't give y 'all any money yet.

Well, Daddy says go ahead and give us the money.

I'll do it.

But I feel like I'm getting ripped off.

Daddy says thanks and leave the bag. The bag's his.

Why? Daddy, I can't say that.

Come on, Daddy.

Daddy says get your pig ass off his land.

He's wilder than any.