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All language subtitles for Tommy Cooper 1978 s01e04 October 2, 1978

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:11,760 --> 00:00:14,740 Ladies and gentlemen, it's Cooper. 2 00:00:16,720 --> 00:00:18,440 Just like that. 3 00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:15,800 South America. 4 00:02:17,960 --> 00:02:19,600 I nearly said South Africa. 5 00:02:22,400 --> 00:02:24,660 It's South America that lives. 6 00:02:26,900 --> 00:02:28,500 A very big bird. 7 00:02:29,980 --> 00:02:33,880 The largest bird in the world. The giant condor. 8 00:02:34,180 --> 00:02:35,180 Ah. 9 00:02:36,280 --> 00:02:37,580 Condor. Condor. 10 00:02:44,720 --> 00:02:49,120 And now my Peruvian friend here, the little buckaroo, 11 00:02:49,460 --> 00:02:56,280 little buckaroo from Peru, will now do 12 00:02:56,280 --> 00:03:03,040 his impression, famous impression of the mating call of a great giant condor. 13 00:03:31,240 --> 00:03:34,260 of the great Alconda. 14 00:03:35,320 --> 00:03:39,860 With the help of Mr. Roberto... Sharper... 15 00:03:39,860 --> 00:03:45,380 Sharper... What's his name? Sharple. 16 00:03:45,620 --> 00:03:46,620 Sharple. 17 00:03:47,380 --> 00:03:53,300 Land of the blue, in Garden 3 -2, it's chilly and very... Hey, hey, hey! 18 00:03:53,960 --> 00:03:58,220 He there, Alconda, gives his mating call... Oh! 19 00:04:02,280 --> 00:04:03,280 Sailor. 20 00:04:46,380 --> 00:04:48,400 I feel very, very happy tonight. I'll tell you the reason why. 21 00:04:49,480 --> 00:04:51,360 Because I've just been offered a part in the film. 22 00:04:55,340 --> 00:04:56,340 Thank you. 23 00:04:58,600 --> 00:04:59,600 I have really. 24 00:04:59,760 --> 00:05:06,120 And I have a very sympathetic part in this film. 25 00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:08,140 Sympathetic part. 26 00:05:09,940 --> 00:05:10,940 The scene opens. 27 00:05:16,590 --> 00:05:17,590 Like that. 28 00:05:19,810 --> 00:05:21,210 And it's a thatch cottage. 29 00:05:21,450 --> 00:05:22,450 All made of thatch. 30 00:05:26,150 --> 00:05:28,730 And I have this very synthetic part. 31 00:05:29,810 --> 00:05:35,350 And the violins are going... Much 32 00:05:35,350 --> 00:05:39,650 better than that. I'm only making that up. 33 00:05:42,750 --> 00:05:44,670 So the old man's sitting in a chair there. 34 00:05:46,010 --> 00:05:47,010 Chair there. 35 00:05:50,950 --> 00:05:52,170 Old man sitting there. 36 00:05:52,810 --> 00:05:54,010 Old lady sitting there. 37 00:05:55,610 --> 00:05:57,810 A baby in a cot and a dog on the mat. 38 00:05:58,990 --> 00:06:00,570 I creep in through the window. 39 00:06:03,490 --> 00:06:05,530 And I hit the old man on top of the head with a hammer. 40 00:06:09,470 --> 00:06:15,490 And he goes... It wasn't loud, it was just... 41 00:06:30,469 --> 00:06:31,550 And I creep over. 42 00:06:35,450 --> 00:06:42,390 I creep over and I 43 00:06:42,390 --> 00:06:43,830 stab the lady in the back. 44 00:06:45,270 --> 00:06:46,510 She doesn't like it. 45 00:06:49,070 --> 00:06:50,330 No, she didn't like it. 46 00:06:52,330 --> 00:06:54,430 Delivery cat. I've already hit him on the head, haven't I? 47 00:06:55,250 --> 00:06:57,930 All the stuff are in the back. There's a baby in the cot and a dog on the mat. 48 00:06:58,470 --> 00:07:01,350 And then I go over and I strangle the baby. 49 00:07:09,530 --> 00:07:13,450 But this is where the sympathetic part comes in. 50 00:07:14,950 --> 00:07:16,290 On the way out, I pat the dog. 51 00:07:25,770 --> 00:07:26,749 Beautiful girl. 52 00:07:26,750 --> 00:07:28,250 Well, this is the way. 53 00:09:13,630 --> 00:09:17,650 There is still a light that shines on me. 54 00:11:50,090 --> 00:11:51,090 You see that? 55 00:11:57,130 --> 00:11:58,270 Couldn't do that at rehearsals. 56 00:12:10,110 --> 00:12:12,570 Now, here's a little trick I picked up. I don't know who dropped it. 57 00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:02,000 I've heard no lessons. 58 00:14:07,120 --> 00:14:08,800 It's all different every night, isn't it? 59 00:16:36,720 --> 00:16:40,980 to the stair rod and why I say that because you're a stair rider 60 00:16:40,980 --> 00:16:47,980 you were right 61 00:16:47,980 --> 00:16:52,980 he told me to say that he was right he was right 62 00:17:10,020 --> 00:17:12,560 Now I've got to do that because you can't play that. 63 00:17:46,280 --> 00:17:47,280 Ha ha ha 64 00:18:24,620 --> 00:18:25,620 What's he doing on here? 65 00:19:09,130 --> 00:19:10,130 what he's doing here. 66 00:20:00,780 --> 00:20:01,900 Don't tell me, just think of one. 67 00:20:03,140 --> 00:20:04,140 Have you thought of a card? 68 00:20:05,760 --> 00:20:07,900 Right. Well, that's a place right there. 69 00:20:09,560 --> 00:20:11,980 I don't know what it is. I'll place the card right there. 70 00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:16,720 I'll have to tell you the name of the card in about two seconds. 71 00:20:30,160 --> 00:20:31,160 Pusha Khasa! 72 00:21:10,570 --> 00:21:17,430 Gently play some music, cool and easy to get you in the 73 00:21:17,430 --> 00:21:20,190 mood for some time. 74 00:21:54,780 --> 00:21:57,020 Once again, it's sing -along time. 75 00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:05,860 With old songs and new songs, summer songs are songless songs. 76 00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:13,280 And then we have new songs and old songs and old songs and new songs. 77 00:22:15,600 --> 00:22:19,460 But first, I think we'll have some old songs before we have the new songs. 78 00:22:21,400 --> 00:22:22,600 And after that, 79 00:22:24,300 --> 00:22:25,300 I don't know what I'm talking about. 80 00:22:27,740 --> 00:22:28,740 Thank you, Mr. Johnson. 81 00:22:56,140 --> 00:22:57,140 Sweet! 5548