Original subtitles

It's there.

Why did you change the pun with Dr. Phil?

Um, because I found someone better.

Who? Her name is Dr. Hope and she has a completely different approach to sex

therapy.

Tell me what you're feeling, Kevin.

Nothing.

Do you want to know what the energy in the room is telling me you're feeling?

It's telling me that you need to be open to opportunity.

It's not that I'm not.

open to opportunity.

It's that you still have not asked us about our marriage.

Well, Tina has told me that you both have very busy schedules and that you're

having a hard time making time for sex.

Is that accurate?

Our jobs are very demanding and doesn't leave a lot of time.

Well, I need you to understand that you do have time for sex.

Yeah, that Around the 14 -hour days, the traffic to get back home, just giving

me enough time to go back to sleep.

Well, you had enough time for this appointment, didn't you?

Yeah, I did.

Well, that's a whole hour you could have been at home having sex with Tina.

But instead, you're here, complaining about why you're not having sex.

What do you think that says?

I hate her. I never want to see her again. Kevin!

Who do you think she is?

She was trying to fix our sex life.

Oh, yeah?

How's that going?

Exactly.

Well, why didn't you answer her question?

Which one?

The one about you having time for therapy, but not having time for sex.

I did have time for sex.

You just kept telling me no.

What are you talking about?

Every morning for like a month, I kept coming after you and trying to get you

into it, and you just kept shutting me down.

I'm just like groggy in the morning.

Well, I'm horny in the morning.

Well, what about all the times I try to have sex at night, and you just said no?

You know I've been working long hours, okay? I'm just tired at night.

we're just on, like, completely different sex schedules.

We both want to have sex, we just want to have it different times.

Remember that Dr. Stone?

He told me to get on testosterone replacement therapy.

Fucking asshole.

Literally the worst therapist ever.

But, I don't know, maybe Dr. Hope was right.

About what?

Staying open to the possibility.

Yeah, but what does that even mean?

I don't know. I think instead of assuming that we can only have sex in

morning or sex at night, we can stay open to the possibility of

having sex during other times.

Like right now?

Yeah, like right now.

Thank you.

Christmas, right?

It's all for you, baby.

I love you so bad.

Yeah.

Thank you.

Good.

Fuck. Is he really a therapist?

I guess not.

Or maybe Dr. Hope was really good.

Maybe.

I've got to answer this call.

Hello? Hey, Michael. It's Sean and Al.

Hey, how you guys been? I've missed you the past couple weeks.

We found another therapist on your phone.

What? Yeah, her name is Dr. Hope. She's just more in line with our way of

thinking.

More energy -based holistic?

Open.

That Dr. Hope holistic therapy bitch has taken my third client this month.

Fourth client.

What? Look, don't get us wrong.

You're great.

She's better.

You're leaving me.

It's not you, per se.

You're breaking up with me?

Well, Dr. Hope was able to do for us in just a couple weeks what you couldn't do

for us in like three years.

Dr. Hope. Dr.

Hope. Dr. Dr.

I swear to God, if I hear that holistic bitch's name one more time, I'm going...

Are you really leaving me?

It's not you. It's us.

Yeah, we just vibe with her better.

Her office has this super great aesthetic. It's very relaxing.

I mean, this place feels like a... A divorce

attorney's office.

Yeah.

That's because this is couple therapy.

This isn't a wellness retreat.

That fucking bitch is going to... I'm not going to have any clients left. I'm

not going to have any clients left.

So, why don't you enlighten me, since you have it all figured out with Dr.

Hope.

What did she do to solve your marital issues?

Well, she phased your apartment.

Yeah, it was great.

Mm -hmm. Worked wonders.

She what?

Good.

All of the negative energy is leaving this space.

Good.

Perfect.

I just want you to sit here and connect with Skyler.

Really feel one another.

Practice that mirror exercise that we talked about.

See each other.

Feel each other.

Stay open.

My job here is done.

Thank you.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Thank you.

Make yourself comfortable.

I'm Rebecca.

Are you going to ask

me what's wrong or?

If you feel like sharing, I'm here to listen.

I'm having a problem at work.

Okay.

This bitch.

is stealing all of my clients.

You seem very angry.

Oh, I am angry. It's a shitty thing to do to someone.

Well, that's your perception.

No, that's a fact.

Do you know that it is?

Definitively? What, that she's stealing all of my fucking clients?

Yeah.

Is she doing it intentionally?

Of course.

Do you know that to be a fact?

You see, there's a difference between someone doing something with malice and

someone doing something without them knowing about it.

Either way, it pisses me off.

Well, that sounds like your problem, not necessarily the problem of the person

that you think is stealing your client.

I told you I'm done being your fuck buddy.

I left Holly.

Are you serious?

I'm seeing a new therapist.

And they told me to really take a step back and reflect on the role that I play

in my own unhappiness.

And what about the role you've played in mine?

Using me for sex?

I wasn't using you. That's the thing.

Brandon. Every single time you came over for the past six months, you were out

the door the second you come.

Because I felt guilty.

Cora, I love my wife. She's an incredible human being that I never

hurt.

But she's not you.

And the mistake I made was trying to make myself feel less guilty by

her and not accepting what I really needed most.

Which is what?

You.

Did you really leave her?

My bags are out front.

He really left her.

It was the right thing to do.

So,

does this mean...

You're moving in now?

This means we're going to do things the right way.

And what's the right way?

I have no idea, but we'll figure it out.

um um

hmm huh

Fucking girls.

Stop fucking me. Stop fucking me.

Shit.

Yeah.

Dr. Stone?

Hey, it's Brandon.

If you fucking cancel on me tomorrow... Cancel? No, I called you to thank you.

What? Yeah, I took your advice. I left my wife.

What?

Yeah, you were right. The issue wasn't my wife, it was me.

Well, it was both of you, but... I'm gonna send everyone I know to you.

My life is so much better because of you, man.

You seem happier today.

I am.

Any particular reason?

I stopped you from stealing one of my clients.

What? That's right.

You are the therapist that I was referring to in my last session. The one

stealing all of my clients.

And I stopped you.

I'm confused.

My real name is Dr. Michael Stone.

Should I know who you are?

Yeah. You've been raiding my therapist's office and stealing all of my clients.

What?

I'm glad you came to see me for therapy.

Clearly you need it.

No, that's not what I...

I'm not here to see you for therapy. I created a fake identity so I can call

out. Wow.

You must be an incredible therapist if you've created a fake identity to come

confront someone as a way of coping.

No, that's not what I... That's not... Look, Tim, Michael, whoever you are, I

don't know how you run things at your practice, but if anyone's coming to me,

it's by word of mouth or by ads I place in the local paper.

So you aren't targeting my practice?

No, but maybe I should be, given as unstable as you seem to be.

It's not that I'm unstable.

I'm paranoid.

My practice has not been doing that well recently.

Well, maybe you should try a more holistic approach.

Never.

Listen, I apologize. I'm sorry, but...

I... Sometimes when things aren't going well, money is tight, you know, people

do crazy things.

I've been there myself.

And it wasn't until I found a skilled therapist that I was able to release

of that anxiety.

And what do you consider a skilled therapist? Someone who plays with a

and burns incense and has pillows everywhere?

Well, believe it or not...

This hippie shit actually works.

If you say so.

Look, I'm sorry if I ruined your business.

It's okay. My business has been doing poorly, like I said, and it helps me

figure out what I've been doing wrong.

I do want to help people.

It's not just about the money.

Michael.

What? That doesn't sound like true self -reflection to me.

True self. What does that even mean?

It means that you're lying.

Of course it's about the money.

And that's okay that it is.

You just need to own your truth.

If I own that truth, then I will lose all of my clients.

Maybe that's what needs to happen so you can find something that actually makes

you happy.

Look, I know that this might be as hippie as it gets, but...

If you do something that truly makes you happy, the money will follow.

Are you really closing your practice?

I am. Do you see the for -leaf sign outside on the door?

Mm -hmm.

Your patient Brandon called me to make an appointment.

He said you took that job at the university.

I did.

Teaching may not pay much, but it's the one thing that makes me happy.

Good for you.

You know, the real reason I came by here was to see if maybe you wanted to grab

a drink.

Isn't that against patient -therapist rules?

Are you really my patient?

I haven't fired you yet.

Good point.

Well, unlike traditional therapy, this hippie new age shit

allows for the patient and the therapist to spend some quality time together if

they like each other.

When exactly did I say that I liked you?

Oh, Michael.

You really need to work on that getting to know yourself thing.

I do, don't I? Mm -hmm.

Maybe we skip that drink and head back to... My place?

That's so fantastic.

Oh my God.

Oh, my God. Yes.

Yes. Yes.

Mm -hmm. Just like that. Mm -hmm. Yeah.

That's it.

Oh, my God. Yes.

Oh, my God.

Yes. Yes.

Yes. Oh, my God.

Oh, yes. You own it. Make it yours.

Oh, fuck, baby. Yes.

Oh.

Oh, shit.

Oh, it's so good.

Oh, it's so fucking good.

Oh, my God.

Yes. Yes, baby.

Yes. Give it to me.

oh my god oh my god

Oh my God, baby.

Oh my God, baby.

Oh my God.

Yes.

Oh my God.

Oh my god.

Oh, my God. Oh,

my God. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Oh,

my God. Oh,

my God. Oh,

my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Oh,

my God. Oh,

my God. Oh,

my God.

Yes. Oh my God, baby.

Do you feel it?

Your chakras?