Original subtitles

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So, we have Captain Teagens, whom the war office wanted transferred to the command of the 19th

Division's horse lines, going instead to the trenches to take over the second command

of the 6th Battalion, the Morganshers, and we have Captain McKechnie who detests Teagens

because he considers the second command of the 6th Battalion, the Morganshers, to be his

by right, going instead to take charge of the 19th Division's horse lines, which he sees

correctly as a humiliation. And finally, we have Major Peron, last heard of attempting

to enter the bedroom of Mrs Teagens, allegedly at her invitation, being sent back to his

battalion as a punishment. All I can say is, it takes a movement order of some genius to

send these three officers up the line, sharing transport.

Er, shouldn't we get out of the train while it's stopped?

Why? The Huns are aiming at the train.

They never hit what they're aiming at. Think of those two pretty sisters with a t-shop

in Poppering. What about them? Blown to bits. Huns couldn't have been aiming at a t-shop.

Please note the seal is unbroken. After the raid, I'll translate your sonnet into

Latin in under three minutes. I suppose you believe I've not read your sonnet. You don't

perhaps imagine that I've opened it and made a call.

Yes, no. I don't care.

You can be witness. Latin hexameters in under three minutes teach him to come the sonnet

here with me. He sells his wife to generals for promotion.

You take them back, you're fine. You're speaking of a lady. You're not fit!

But it's for me to defend her. What's this?

What's this? Can't they control yourself? Well, the first thing I do is report you to

the ammo and you'll find yourself under the care of the mad doctors.

And put me to Terrence. Terrence is my pal. We're all pals in a battalion. Best battalion

in the line, how we worked at it. No, I'm banished to a horse-caper's job in transport.

Poor old Colonel Bill's got you as his number two.

Poor old Bill. You're my new soldier. Do you think you're an infantryman? You're a

bolster. A big baggy bolster.

Poor battalion. Poor bloody old pals. Oh, God. Are we going to die?

Poor old Bill who sweated for the battalion. What do you think it's like, teachings?

When you stop one. When you know this is it? Death.

The faculties are numbed. You feel no pain. No apprehension.

Thank you, teachings. Thank you. Now he's got you. Poor old Bill.

Oh, thank God. We're moving.

I can smell bacon. I'm a snake drops.

Happy birthday, darling.

Why did you find the snowdrops? Oh, I didn't pick them, I'm afraid. Well, I picked them in Shepherd's

Market. Thank you for my Valentine card.

And there's a telegram for you.

But someone's remembered your birthday.

It's a matter. Must be from Christopher.

Son, darling, son.

Octopus.

It's from Edward. Glasgow Postmark. He must be on shore. That's good. Anyway.

Happy birthday, comrade. Let live. Come to Hottie.

Long live the October Revolution. I suppose he thought it might not get through now.

The Bolsheviks have made peace with Germany. Is my son a Bolshevik now?

Well, it's enough to make anyone Bolshevik sending men and boys to murder each other in millions.

I don't want a birthday if he's lying dead. He's not dead. He's in Glasgow. I'm men.

You're surely not in love with Christopher Teagens. You mustn't be. He's a married man. But when he comes home, he will make me his mistress.

Oh, he won't. But you wouldn't. And he wouldn't. He always thought he was infallible. He'll keep some of his principles. He won't divorce his wife. I don't care. I've always thought love was a kind of literature.

But every word Christopher Teagens and I have ever said to each other was a declaration of love.

Captain Teagens reporting for duty. Nothing. I'm the editor. The CEO is inspecting our trench. Aubrey.

The tally's down to a third of its full strength. 328 last count. Call it 75 per company. Nothing for you to do except wait for the German push.

They send a few shells before breakfast after lunch. We thought the chance they might rush a trench just for the fun of it. So we've got to keep a sharp look at. The only thing I'll show you around when it's quiet.

Come on, Teag, let's go!

Bennett, sir. Go down. Go down.

There.

Thanks, please.

Colonel Williams, sir. Commanding officer.

What are you doing, isn't that? No man's laying, sir. And then the hum.

What the hell is he?

Can't see him, sir.

Who is that?

Have a care, sir. The snipers? I'll be shooting at the sea.

I'm Captain Teagens, sir. Nobody at home, Regimental Sergeant Major.

The case of Mrs. G is not exceptional. Her husband was accustomed to pet her and have relations with her frequently. But yet he never took any trouble to rouse her in the necessary preliminary feeling for mutual union.

Because she's shyly asked him, Mrs. G's husband gave her one swift, unrepeated kiss upon her persu-

Come along, don't you hear the bell?

Quickly girls.

Please?

You have to report it to the head. There's no question about that.

Has he already said so terrible?

Yes, it is. It's the vilest exposing young women's minds to...

How much of it did you read?

Quite a lot of it. We did some more, Mrs Ferguson.

By your own?

Would it be too wicked if Miss Wann had told the head that she just found it somewhere in the pavilion or something?

I've decided. I'm going to put it back.

You will not.

Why not? It's a proper book. It's not trash.

But it's not for children.

I was a suffragist when I was at the age of our senior girls.

I thought that getting the vote for women was the only thing that would make me happy.

And now we've just got the vote.

Some of it. Some of us.

And about time, too.

But it's got nothing to do with happiness. I found out that much.

It's a book for married women.

No, it isn't.

Yes, it is, by George.

It's a book about married love.

Girls want to be married. And some of them will be, and soon.

So it's for them, too. And according to Dr Stokes, most of them will be unhappy out of sheer ignorance.

Or their husband's ignorance. We want them to be happy, don't we?

We do.

Put it back.

I'll answer for it to the head. If any of you care to sneak.

Good for you, Miss Wannup.

You've just got time.

I'll be back.

Get out of here!

It's a little bit of a while!

Did you lie? Did you lie? Did you lie?

Robert!

Get out of here! For God's sake!

Get out of here!

Get out of here!

Don't you marry me!

Don't you lie?

Take the hunt first! He's alive!

I'm Ernst Dann.

Dan Kool, you are sir. Dan Kool.

I'm not going to lie!

I'm not going to lie!

Do you think Rupert Brooke was the handsome Miss Mann in England?

Do you hear that?

The miners.

I don't.

I think Pamela Cheney's show for was.

I'm going to be a good friend.

And God bless Mommy and Daddy and Granny.

And Granny and Grandpa and Helen.

And Aunt Effie and Uncle Arthur.

And Marchy and everybody.

And God bless Milly.

Hop in.

And stay in.

No?

Mommy will be up to sea.

She says to put him down.

Who she?

The council mother.

Dressing girl.

Did you hang something from the train, Vy?

So the wood sprites don't get you.

The wood sprites won't catch me.

Oh, give me bombs any day.

Bombs are natural.

It has stood for two hundred years.

It will stay standing until Michael is master of Groby.

He can decide whether to cut it down or not.

You missed the point exactly.

I want the tree gone before Michael.

Is it any say in the matter?

He'll grow up at Teagens,

backward looking and sentimental.

It's paganism hanging up their bits and bulbs like savages.

The landstew had well satan in for Mark if he ordered the cedar to be cut down.

Well let him.

Brother Mark has abdicated from Groby.

He has chosen the life of a London clubman with an actress and the Grey is in road.

And Christopher, for all I know, will live in sin after the war with these little games mistress.

That's all it is.

You want to make Christopher suffer.

Oh boy, between you and the Germans, anyone would think you were his mother, not mine.

I pray even more fervently for you as we are taught to do for all sinners.

That's what I get.

They're keeping myself chaste.

All these years.

You mean since you've bolted?

Potiparone deserved me.

I chose the path of charity.

Jesus would have done.

They say he died with a smile on his face.

Potty, I mean.

Well I'll spare the Groby tree for the duration, but if my husband thinks he can throw me over

for that scrub face ladies champion of the regular bowel movement,

he's the only man who perhaps wouldn't.

Until go to heaven for it.

You say that because you think of God as an English landowner or a colossal scale who never leaves his study so is invisible.

Well if Christopher's not in heaven, win the wars over, he won't be engraisly,

not with little mitt hockey sticks on my furniture, I'll strip the plates.

What is it? I said I'll come up.

I'm sorry madam.

Bye.

For the sake of your soul, will you go into a retreat for a week or two?

You need to reflect upon what to ask of God.

I thought perhaps...

India.

India.

Come on in officer and free company, Trenza!

Let's go, let's go!

I'll get come and fill over to the M.R.

Report to me in the first time of year.

Two observers in every company.

Everyone else in pursuit, dog arms.

Taking over to every command.

Shut up!

And Bobby?

She married quietly abroad.

Oh, so congratulations to you.

When? September.

But how lovely for Bobby.

The only person who comes well out of this is Johnny Pelham, letting Bobby divorce him.

I hope you know Lady Glauvina that Bobby asked me to get Johnny out of the house when he was being miserable.

And that's all there was to that.

I suppose you told Christopher.

I went to visit Christopher in France two months ago.

They're working him treadily hard.

In an enormous camp commanded by General Campion.

If you've come to ask me to do something for Christopher, I should tell you that Bertram is simply overwhelmed at the war cabinet.

No. It's the general.

He's like a war horse and a paddock.

He simply can't be allowed to end his career like that.

We can. You probably will.

That's pillow talk, mind you.

Sylvia. Excuse me.

Oh, no, please stay if you can, Bertram.

Stay at your peril. Sylvia has a bit between her teeth.

Well, if I can have a drink for a few minutes.

I'm concerned for Ed wrote.

Campion?

Why has he got a glorified quartermaster's job fitting out troops for General Perry's command?

Because it's a vital job and Campion does it superbly.

But General Perry's command is the only one who's going to be a war horse.

Perry's command is the only fighting command that might become free.

He's taken to getting his friends to write to the times about being starved of troops.

Edward Campion should have this sort of job which brings a hero's welcome and a peerage at the end of his.

And from that, who knows?

Perhaps India. India?

Vice-Ri of India.

Why not?

General served with great distinction in India.

That's well said.

And I must leave you.

I'm so glad things are settled with Bobby.

Thank you, my dear.

Carpet, sell a son from Turkey or somewhere with the beastliest newspapers in London as a son in law.

Is it turnity then?

Just the man to put the public behind General Campion.

How long is your leave?

It isn't leave.

I ordered myself home to be at the wall office first thing in the morning to ask if anyone there understands that if they don't do something about it, there'll be nothing behind us but the sea.

I'll probably be relieved of my command, but then there's not much career left for a man of 60 unless he's given a fighting army.

We'll see.

Can you come to Grobe for the weekend?

It'll be very quiet. Just Bobby and her new husband.

You don't know Lord Bitesch and the press lord.

And I do that. I'd love to see Grobe.

How's Christopher?

Don't you see him?

No, he's at the front now. I had no choice after.

Of course you didn't. A chance of glory then?

Absolutely. A chance of glory. Lucky. Beggar.

I'm sorry.

There ain't no beastly snipers is there sir?

Skylark, will you walk into my mouth?

There's been a Skylark seeing on the morning of every strafe I've ever been in.

One of all trust in humanity sir.

I don't know if we're instincting the feather breast by the whole mighty.

Grobe is going to wet a Skylark on a battlefield.

I don't know if I did or mighty.

It's all one to a Skylark with a tie explosives or a plow.

Thirty minutes of the barrel at his punctual.

There are a good lot of chaps sir. The best.

Given the right sort of officers they'll beat the world.

They know what they're doing.

They think it matters too much who gives you order.

No sir. They've been fighting these last few days.

They're better now.

The devil is that row.

Oh, like Griffiths, sir.

Cat may make a promise to area after breakfast and recommended to play in the divisional follies.

Captain McEdney is with us again.

Carry on. Carry on.

Come past an extra verse. I want to speak with you.

Straight is due in seven minutes.

We'll have to put a tin hat on if you're staying here.

How dare you give me orders?

It wouldn't look well with the divisional transport officer dead in my lines in a parade.

The transport officer has the right to consult the CEO of the battalion he's supplying.

I'm commanding him. He consulted me.

This is what it's come to with the old battalion.

The bloody, bloody old battalion of pals.

What are you going to do about Bill?

The M.O. has authority to send the colonel on sick leave for a couple of months.

I know what you're up to.

If you got poor Bill Cashier, they'd put in another pocket colonel.

But if you send him sick, you're pretty sad to get the commander. This is stopgap.

Captain McEdney! You can fall out.

Return to duty. You're own duty.

And a proper head threat.

Oh, I suppose if you're in command.

It is usual to say, sir, when the Jessica Senior Officer on parade,

you don't catch the divisional headquarters. Get back there now at once, sir!

I haven't forgotten about your sonnet, sir.

Please note, the seal is unbroken.

Order your room says when you look through these, sir.

So, does the truck in solid is different to the Shakespearean's sonnet, sir?

Of course. The final couple of after three quatrains would be an abomination of the battalion solid.

Captain McEdney, you still here?

I'll tell the coroner to report to you tomorrow for the entertainment.

His name is Griffith. Find it for me, Corporal.

Yes, sir.

By the way, General Campion has to take over this army the other day after tomorrow.

We've got word at Division HQ.

So Campion is back.

That means the French have single command.

It will get reinforcements.

Captain McEdney told me that you wrote a sonnet in two and a half minutes, sir.

It's just a trick.

There was a late fair and kind.

Miss Bonham.

Mr. Teethoven.

How's your flame in there?

In a shop, left handed around you, is it an ined?

It's a minute, sir.

If I stop once, sir, we tell Minette that I...

Little Nippers like you don't stop things.

Besides, the wind's on our backs. We'd set off without gas.

I remember that hun in our trench you got shot in both eyes.

Your girl naturally went. Look at you, if you let her down, sir, by losing your beauty.

I did see. I'll sing by...

Yes, I will.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Yes.

Well...

Griffiths, you and your Cornet are to report to Divisional HQ tomorrow night.

With the entertainment.

I think you can hold it. You and I then?

Yes, sir.

Very good.

Fall out there.

Right on time.

I don't want to leave my battalion to a man that would knock it about while I'm on sick leave.

I won't let discipline get it, sir, if that's what you mean.

I should get it.

Nothing will tell us if anything's wanted.

I suppose I could get rid of you with a bad report.

Well, perhaps I couldn't.

They say your campions bastard.

I'm his godson.

I'm not going to bring a general on my back.

No, stop where you are.

This isn't the strafe.

This is only a little extra morning hate.

You can tell by the noise.

That's 4.2s.

The really heavy stone comes so fast they'll be turning on the Worcester's now and...

Only give us one every half minute.

That's their game.

If you don't know that, what are you doing here?

You hear?

I'm not in a condition to do it myself.

The men appear to like you.

They're tired of me.

I'm not in a condition to do it myself.

I'm not in a condition to do it myself.

The men appear to like you.

They're tired of me.

They're tired of me.

Well...

Take the battalion with my blessing.

Brigade want to know if we're suffering any.

Well, we aren't suffering any, are we?

No, not in particular.

Shall in the entrance of the sea company dug out one man dead.

This officer is taking over from me.

Oh, tell Brigade we're all as happy as sandboys.

You may as well make it cheerful and prescient to begin with.

I knocked, sir, but I didn't come in.

May I oblige us tomorrow?

You have to get your transfer stored by morning.

Just make sure the men keep their heads down.

Yes, sir.

You three. I'll be right.

Go and tell Bee Company that I'll come and take a look at them.

Say 10 minutes. Keep lying inside without man as you go.

Sir.

You're also a company dug out for the first time.

I'm not a company.

I'm not a company.

I'm not a company.

I'm not a company.

I'm not a company.

I'm not a company.

I'm not a company.

I'm not a company.

Say a company dug out for the favour of a sandwich and a coffee with some ramen.

Sir.

Sir.

Sir.

Sir.

Thank you, Corporal.

Mm.

Did you get it back to me, Corporal?

Yes, sir.

Half a tin of warm mutton and a cup of water.

Sir.

Thank you, Corporal.

Mm.

You got it back to me, Corporal?

Yes, sir.

Half a tin of warm mutton and a cup of water.

Half a tin of warm mutton and a cup of beans when I was cutting the sandwiches.

Well.

Middle's, ma.

Nearly right, sir.

Me, mother is Middle's birth.

I'm from Batley.

Oh, great.

That's right, sir.

I've walked a groovy over Sunday afternoon, many a times.

My father goes down Batley picked.

Oh.

Sometimes you hear the pics at night.

My grandfather's time, I'm my father's.

My father's name is Jim.

Jim came back to me the other night.

I thought it was a German's mining.

Mrs. Dad, a comb hanging from the groovy tree.

You see, the old cedar will have to come down one of these days soon.

Do they, by God?

I'll prop up the house if I have to.

I'll help you, sir.

Wouldn't be groovy.

I'll remember your sandwiches so long as I live.

Thank you.

Thanks, German shells.

You can be coming back.

My compliments to the RSM,

would he get his fatigue party under cover as soon as they get clicks?

Right, sir.

So that no toast, less noble, may be drunk from it.

There must be someone you love, sir.

Is she like Manette?

Not exactly like her, but I'm sure with Manette's best qualities.

Then you'll get her, sir.

You'll certainly get her.

Yes.

Yes, I'll probably be shy.

If there's enough time for beer companies to get themselves tidied up,

Germans did over that trench like a doggy once had to do over drawing them.

Thank you!

Don't need your shovels about to get in the way with their tack-up.

Yes, sir. Sorry, sir.

Corporal!

No!

Sergeant!

Street's a bearer!

Street's a bearer!

You!

You're disgustingly filthy.

I suppose you have an explanation.

Where the devil is the commanding officer of this battalion?

I am in command, sir.

I was mad when I sent you out here.

I shall send you back.

You can pull out.

Hey.

You!

APPLAUSE

APPLAUSE

Gerald!

I would never pretend you have the same name.

Sylvia!

Nellie!

I've quite got her, baby.

Well, that's love, I suppose.

No, I've even hated you.

I got her loving you years ago.

You haven't changed at all.

I'm in a ghastly set.

Would you like to take me on somewhere?

You always were such a brute.

I don't think I'm complaining.

I told you how long since you wouldn't believe me.

I'm sure I'm safe, but...

So why?

My husband may not be returning to me after the war's over.

My desi why I shouldn't get something out of people taking me for a whore.

I didn't know you hated me.

Why ever not?

Funking a divorce and leaving me to hold the baby.

But Michael's growing up into a tea gin, so...

may have been a panic over nothing.

How does one know?

Teagens turned out alright.

He was up for a decoration,

but General Campion told him there were only certain number of medals to go around.

And no doubt teagens were preferred to be given someone who'd get more advantage from it.

Good lord, he didn't know.

Wounded saving life under fire months ago.

How typical? He never tells me anything.

Why aren't you in France, by the way?

Too valuable.

I've been in Washington.

American troops are coming over in force now, which means the war is over.

Really over?

Like Guy Fawkes, the answer.

Really, so Christopher will be coming home.

Will you come back to bed?

No.

I can't go through all that again.

Penny for the guy.

Penny for the guy?

Penny for the guy?

Penny for the guy?

Thank you.

Thank you.

I saw your note too late.

But you came in time.

The doctors got me sure how long I have left.

Hold my hand, Ali.

You'll note about the tree.

Oh, the tree.

Well, I tried to warn you.

Where were you all this time?

Well, brother fixed your release from the Army weeks ago.

You should have been here to take charge of the estates.

And if you won't, needs must.

And let the chips fall where they may.

Couldn't you tell yourself away from your mistress?

I was in hospital.

Goodbye, Sylvia.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Oh, please.

Please, please.

Oh, no more torpedoes.

Good.

When I think of the millions that died and that imbecile tigens strolling home without a scratch.

I'm absolutely counting on the Germans.

Supposing it calls in his loans. It would be our ruination.

Teasions.

Impossible is it maybe for you to understand.

Then don't try to make me.

You sponged off in for thousands and now it's got you by what you singularly lack.

Well, since the wife is chosen to reject the hand of French if I extended to that harlot.

It's time to bring the mistress back into the fold.

Edward!

Is that you, Valentine?

It's Lady McMaster here.

Edith.

You did the study as no furniture.

You're a pair to be a bit mad.

He's alone.

He asked about me, but it didn't ask for you.

Darling, Christopher wouldn't brine you amongst your own people.

Now, if you birthed to be ruined, Valentine, I'd ruin myself gladly to make him happy for an hour.

I've waited and waited.

I cannot. I will not renounce the schooling of my whole life.

This is my...

This one?

Did you send for me?

No.

Well, I'm glad you came.

I heard you will.

Not too bad. All things considered.

What is that?

I'm taking it to Mark.

You can come with me.

How dare you bring this one up here?

Are you in silver divorcing?

No.

The hell is that?

Sylvia had the tree felled.

I know.

She asked me.

I didn't have a damn about the tree.

Now, perhaps God will change sight.

I will not divorce the mother of my child.

Sylvia will not divorce me.

I don't care.

I have to bathe.

Change into my uniform.

If my friends arrive.

You might entertain them.

Darling.

I'm awfully sorry.

Not entirely for you.

Both.

I came to tell you that they are going to operate on me tomorrow for a cancer.

Liar!

You haven't got a cancer, you're lying.

Really?

This is what you do, isn't it?

What can you mean?

Do you know what she means?

Miss Lorna means pulling the strings of the shower bar.

Christopher.

Christopher.

Christopher.

You can't mean it.

Look at her.

She ain't got a guide or something.

I'm sorry.

Perhaps you do mean it.

Well.

I wish you both nothing but happiness.

Please remember me to your charming mother.

I'm sorry.

I must see that fellow teaching.

It's an urgent matter about Sonic.

Oh, but it's not necessary to shout.

Please come in.

I'm Captain McKecney, formerly seconding commander, sixth and Morgan Chiles.

The pals.

Good evening.

That's my CEO.

Good old Colonel Billy brought the hooch.

McKecney, I thought I got rid of you.

Oh, good.

I'm sorry.

The pals.

Shut up McKecney.

You're the captain's dead friend.

He saved my life.

He's an expevered of the notes of a marathon like this.

You shall all be such friends.

It's our only visa.

They say you're receiving petitions.

They seem to have been sold up.

He's a good fat old beggar of teachers.

A good officer.

One of the best.

Here he is.

Here he is.

Here he is.

Here he is.

Here he is.

Here he is.

Here he is.

Good old teachers.

As well as looking after you.

But, Chilim, here.

What a fire.

Mademoiselle's without no tears.

Oh, hey hoo.

Mademoiselle private tears.

Oh, you do.

Mademoiselle private tears.

What a surprise to find you here.

Tell me what to do with you.

Mademoiselle private tears.

This is the last time in the last 10 minutes.

Mademoiselle private tears.

What a surprise to find you here.

Tell me what to do with you.

Mademoiselle private tears.

Mwah!

I'm the one who's listening.

I thought it was Christopher, will you marry me?

Tell him, blow up!

They will be no more brains!

Tell him, they're straight!

Hey, great!