Original subtitles

[instrumental music]

[music continues]

[ship horn blaring]

[ship horn blaring]

[dramatic music]

[ship horn blaring]

[instrumental music]

[ship horn blaring]

I wouldn't do that if i were you.

Wouldn't you? Thanks for the advice.

But how do i know she ain't gonna jump?

She's alright. She's not gonna do anything.

Just gonna stand there.

'Then she's gonna walk up and down'

"and then she'll go and lean against that bollard'

'and just stand there and look out to sea.'

She ain't got no right to be out there without a pass!

Brother, she'll have a pass.

She could have a pass to the White House if she wanted it.

You start pushing around, you're going to get yourself

into trouble. She's a somebody.

Speakin' of passes, where's yours?

Oh.

You're new here, aren't you?

[ship horn blaring]

Ship's master, huh?

I came ashore on a dinghy.

It's tied up down there at the end of the pier.

There, you see?

- Told you she was alright. - 'What's she gonna do now?'

Just look. She's watching for a ship to come in.

Only it's sitting at the bottom of the Atlantic.

What ship is that?

Used to be called the Fortuna.

Oh, yeah, that gamblin' ship.

She used to be sitting right here at this dock--

- That's right. - You know, I was on Pier 27--

Yeah, I know, I know.

[ship horn blaring]

It was owned by a boss gambler called Joe the Greek.

- You ever hear of him? - Oh, sure, I did.

Everybody read the newspapers and, uh..

- You know him? - Yep.

- I was master of the Fortuna. - Eh..

Say, tell me, was he, was he really a Greek?

Nobody ever knew what he was, except tough.

And, brother, you got to understand

he wasn't just ordinary tough, he was double tough!

And too smart for his own good.

Oh, huh.

- Crossed you up, huh? - Oh, no.

Crossed himself up.

How?

That's how.

'Right here on this pier was the last time'

she ever saw him.

When was that?

Back a ways when we had the Fortuna tied up here.

We weren't operating then.

We were broke and full of trouble.

One day Joe comes breezing in

with his face full of fine and dandy

and his heart full of ice water.

You see, we had been driven off the west coast by the law.

Put in here to raise a bankroll

so we could operate in Havana.

Joe was kind of up against it.

There was a Greek sailor on board

at that time, a guy named Bascopolous.

[instrumental music]

[whistling]

[whistling]

[whistles]

- How's Bascopolous? - Huh.

Looks like he's gonna join Barnum and Bailey, Joe.

What did the doc say?

Well, according to the doc, he's already gone.

Said he wouldn't last over an hour two hours ago.

All gone inside.

- How'd it go uptown today? - Swell. Thanks, Swede.

I got the plaster taken off the boat. We can sail anytime.

Good, you know those mugs of yours

have been getting kinda restless.

Oh, yeah?

- Let me know when he goes. - Right.

[whistling]

[rattling]

Hey, Blubber. Fix this thing!

- Something wrong, boss? - It paid!

There ain't no customers, Joe.

There's gonna be customers where we're goin'.

- Fix it! - Okay.

[Joe whistling]

Hello, boys. Well, I got it.

Cost me ten grand, but it was worth it.

Look at that, signed by His Honor

the superior court judge.

Took seven lawyers to write it, and Joe to do the fixing.

Put it in the safe, Zepp.

Boys, we're sailing for Havana

as soon as Bascopolous kicks off.

Forget it, Joe. This ship ain't goin' nowhere.

- Who says so? - 'Your Uncle Sam.'

- What is this? A rib? - Yeah.

Take a gander at those kites.

"J. Bascopolous, G. Zepp, J. Adams, eh.."

1-A? They can't do this to me, I'm a civilian.

(Zepp) 'That's what you think.'

Take a look at mine, I got the same thing.

1-A!

They don't even give you time to cut off a leg.

How do you juice your way out of the army?

(Zepp) 'You don't.'

Listen, this is my war, I had my war

crawling out of the gutter the hard way.

- I won that war. - Yeah?

Well, it looks like you're gonna help win this one.

Go on, I don't recognize any other war.

It's okay, chief. Don't worry.

- I got it all fixed, Joe. - Yeah?

We can hop a plane out of here for Mexico City in two hours.

- What? - Yeah.

And from there, we can catch a plane to Rio.

You can work South America until this

soldier business blows over.

Yeah, take it easy, Crunk.

There's a lot of guys with big dough down there, Joe.

Yeah, well, relax. Thanks, Crunk.

Look, you think I'm gonna give up the boat

on account of this card?

None of you other guys got one, huh?

That's what you get for using your own name.

Change it once a month the way we do.

Who says it's my own name?

"J. Bascopolous."” What did he get?

"4-F?" What's that?

It means they don't want him. He's physically unfit.

- Uh, lucky stiff. - Yeah.

He's physically unfit alright.

Or is he?

Alright, boys, get lost.

One of us is out of the army, Joe.

Who declared you in?

Well, we're partners, ain't we?

'That's a 50-50 proposition in my book.'

What do you want, half the card?

I'll trade you my half of the boat for the card, Joe.

(Joe) What good would a boat do me in the army?

The one who gets the card gets the boat along with it.

(Zepp) 'Who gets it, Joe?'

Wanna cut for it?

[sighs] Poker dice.

- 'You got a deal.' - I'll get the box.

(Joe) Wait a minute.

Can't you wait and make the thing legal?

(Zepp) 'What's wrong with poker dice?'

Not a thing. Only the guy ain't dead yet.

I never took anything off a pal in my life.

After he joins the circus, that's different.

Come on.

Nervous.

Take your best shot, Zepp.

[dice rattling]

Three kings, Joe.

[rattling]

Have a smoke, Crunk.

[dice rattling]

(Zepp) 'Four kings, Joe.'

In two rolls.

Beat it!

Can you hold it a minute, chief?

Shoot.

Three aces.

What did you think this was? Amateur night?

I don't get you, Joe.

Didn't you see an elephant walk

across the table with muddy feet?

Oh, I didn't pull a switch on you, Joe.

Didn't you?

Then blow on it for luck.

Go on, blow!

[blows]

(Zepp) 'I wouldn't shuffle around my own partner.'

Sure, you wouldn't.

One more ace, that's it.

Yeah, that's it.

There it is.

Well, looks like the army needs men like you, Zepp.

Take good care of yourself.

I'll have a nice big service flag

with a single star on it hangin' in my office.

Just for you.

- Swede, see you later. - Where you going, Joe?

Uptown, raise a bankroll so we can sail.

I thought you told me you lifted the plaster.

Sure, but that took everything we had.

We need 50 grand before we can start operatin'.

- Where you gonna get it? - Oh..

I can raise that kind of wind

in one afternoon.

Oh, uh, Swede, shake hands

with the new Joe Bascopolous.

- Alright. - Here, uh, Swede.

Take this dough and give Joe Adams in there

a swell funeral, lots of nice white flowers.

Always thought the guy had a lot of good in him.

- What's he talking about? - You explain it to him, Crunk..

While i get a fresh tie and change my fiddle. Go on.

Well, I guess that's enough of that.

Yup.

You anxious to get in the service?

You don't know what it cost me, doc.

That's too bad. Your blood pressure is 210.

- We can't use you. - Well, you can't use..

I said we can't use you. I-I'm sorry.

Will it hurt if i get drunk?

Well, it-it won't do you any good.

Well, I am gonna get drunk and i am gonna stay drunk.

Too bad. A fine, patriotic fellow.

It's been a shock to him.

[car honks]

Hey, come on. Throw that thing away.

Did you raise the wind?

"Raise the wind?" I couldn't even raise a good cough.

I don't know what happened to this town.

How about all those soft touches you knew?

Well, the heat's on, they either got caught in the draft

or went square and paid their income taxes.

Huh. Income taxes.

How you gonna raise the dough, Joe?

How do i know? I tried every guy i ever knew.

Looks like our luck is out.

- Boss! - Don't do that!

But look!

One, two, three, four, five, six naturals.

This is strictly from heaven. This is gonna change your luck.

Come on, what are we waitin' for? Let's do it.

- You do it, I'll wait here. - What?

You know it's no good if we both don't do it.

What's the matter with you, you crazy?

You trying to jinx it or somethin'?

This is a sure thing. Can't miss.

Sit down, boss.

[sighs]

- Okay, Joe. - Fine.

Take it easy, bud. Come on, the fellow is gettin' nervous.

Thanks, pal.

- How do you do? - Hmm?

How do you do?

Can i sell you a ticket

to our charity ball?

- Sure. - One or two?

Two!

- They're $50 a piece. - Uh..

Oh, I know they're frightfully expensive

but we're trying to raise a $100,000.

Are you now?

- That's a coincidence. - What's it for, sister?

War Relief Incorporated.

Hmm, I am interested in relief.

Uh, where are your headquarters?

- The address is on the ticket. - Uh-huh.

Thanks. I'll look you up.

I may throw something your way.

Thank you.

[engine revving]

Where can i find the big boss?

I'm sorry, they're all very busy just now.

[inaudible chatter]

(Joe) I want to make a donation.

[inaudible chatter]

What kind of donation did you want to make?

Seventy, eighty thousand dollars!

Just wait!

There's a man over there...

[all clamoring]

- Where is he? - Oh, is that him?

There's a man over there who's going to give us seventy...

[all clamoring]

- Where is he? - Is that him?

- $75,000. - Wouldn't that be marvelous?

Our Captain Steadman would like to see you, Mr.--

Just a moment, Mrs. Ostrander!

Did you say 70 or 700 dollars?

- Seventy thousand. - I told you!

- This way, please. - Seventy thousand?

Captain Steadman, this is mister, uh..

I don't believe i got your name.

Joe. How are you?

- Joe? - Joe.

Oh, Joseph. Don't you understand?

It's Mr. Joseph. Do sit down.

Close the door as you go out, please.

You wonderful man.

You couldn't have come at a more timely moment.

You know, the sale for the tickets of our bazaar

has been so disappointing.

You know, we have to send a whole shipload

of medical supplies to Europe.

It's frightfully expensive

and we have to raise the money as quickly as possible.

I do hope you want to make your donation in cash.

- I always do business in cash. - Oh, that's splendid.

- You'll have to help me though. - Oh, of course.

You see, I'm a boss gambler. That's my business.

Oh, we never inquire into one's associations.

Now this charity affair of yours, that's made to order.

All you have to do is give me the gambling concession.

- Gambling? - Sure. Blackjack.

Chuck-a-luck, roulette.

I'll raise the dough for you in one evening.

- I don't understand. - Well, it's simple.

You're giving a ball, we take rooms next to it.

You steer the customers in.

I supply the dealers, the tables, the layout.

All you have to do is sit back and rake in the winnings.

But are there always winnings? Supposing you lose?

I always do. Last winter in Palm Beach, I--

Sure, that's my point. I bet you dropped a packet, didn't you?

Well, look..

...I'll show you what i mean. You roll the dice.

- 'You're the customer.' - Shall i?

(Joe) 'Sure, go on, roll 'em.'

Snake eyes, eh?

Now watch the difference.

Seven. See the difference? I'm lucky. I can't lose.

Now roll 'em again. You're still the customer.

- Try a dump shot. - Dump shot?

That's right. Put 'em in the glass. Rattle 'em about.

That's it now.

See, four. Tough point to make.

Now watch this.

- Seven. - How do you do it?

Influence.

You bring me the right people, I'll get you that $100,000.

- But it's-it's gambling. - Not the way i do it.

[knock on door]

Look, how much do you figure to raise on this ball?

Oh, between 15 and 20 thousand.

Yeah, but you're aiming at a hundred grand.

Now, you string along with me

and in one night, you're home, James!

(Joe) But you won't get it listening to that woodpecker.

It so happens that gambling is against the law in this country.

Uh, what's the matter with Reno?

Out there it's as legal as selling groceries.

Well, it so happens we're in New York.

So we are. What a pity!

Oh, Dorothy, this is Mr. Joseph.

My lieutenant, Ms. Bryant.

I already had the pleasure.

It so happens, Mr. Joseph, that we have a committee

of financial advisors.

Strange they've never hit upon your plan if it's so sound.

Well, not everyone can do it, lieutenant. It's kind of, um..

Dangerous. That's what i mean.

I'm afraid Ms. Bryant's right.

Perhaps if you send us a letter explaining your plan in detail.

Yes, and we'll be glad to take it up at our next meeting.

Well, you're in a hurry for this dough.

You can't afford to wait for meetings.

Well, we can't afford to sponsor something

we might later regret.

Goodbye, Mr. Joseph, and thank you.

Mm. Uh-uh-uh.

Look out! Don't let it get in your blood, captain. It's bad.

- Excuse me. - Dorothy.

Don't forget your appointment at the bank.

(Dorothy) Alright.

Mother. Mother, come here. What bank is that?

Why, it's at 31 East 39th.

Thanks, toots.

- Where to, boss? - The bank.

- Oh, no-- - Sh!

[indistinct chatter]

- Next. - Eh..

- Good afternoon. - Hello, Ms. Bryant.

(female #1) 'This is your third visit.'

- Isn't it? - Yes.

We'll have your silver button

waiting for you as soon as you're through.

- Thank you. - Sit right over there, please.

[indistinct chatter]

Well, hello!

- Next, please. - Uh, that's you, chum.

Everybody move up, please.

Move up one. Thanks, bud.

Well, well.

This is quite a surprise.

Not particularly. It so happens i rather expected it.

And if you think your persistence

is going to have any effect on me

you're mistaken.

[sighs] Well, I can't see

how you people can pass up $80,000 for the cause.

- For whose cause? - Huh.

If you're so interested in serving a cause

why don't you join the army?

- 'Next, please.' - Oh.

- 4-F. - You look 1-A to me!

Yeah, you don't look so bad yourself.

[laughs] Oh..

- Well, it's my arteries. - 'Right this way, please!

- Should you be giving blood? - Oh, well.

My blood's 1-A.

Just my arteries are 4-F.

"J. Bas.."

"Bascopolous.”

I thought you said your name was Joseph?

Well, if a fellow went around calling himself Bascopolous

think what the other people would call him.

[laughing]

Look, uh..

Why didn't you let me finish what, ahem, excuse me

what i was trying to tell the captain? Hmm?

It so happens i don't trust your motives.

Yeah, here i am giving my life's blood.

And she don't trust my motives.

The person who gets your life's blood

will probably develop a sudden passion for the dump shot.

Yeah, and the poor soldier that gets your blood

they can use him for an ice cube.

- 'Next, please. - Well, it so happens--

Wait a minute. What is that "so happens" routine?

It so happens that's a phrase i use.

Well, but it so happens, I'm offering you eight--

(female #1) 'Next, please!

Goodbye. And the answer is still no.

- 'This isn't the way out!' - Ha-ha. Don't bother me.

But you can't go now. You've got to rest for 20 minutes.

Look, sister, take a walk. I feel like a million dollars.

But you must lie down and rest.

I feel great!

- Hiya, boss. - How was it, Crunk?

Wonderful! They only took a pint.

I'm comin' back tomorrow and givin' 'em a gallon.

This thing is a...

You see, what did i tell you?

[instrumental music]

What do you say, Crunk?

I thought we had rat guards on this boat.

How'd you get on?

- Joe up? - What are you doin' back?

I'll do my talkin' to Joe if you don't mind.

(man on radio) 'From Athens, heroic Greek troops'

'were denied defending the mountain passes'

'of Northern Greece against invading German'

'and Italian forces. Despite their desperate efforts..'

- Hey, boss, 1-A is back. - What?

I can't hear you. Turn that thing off.

(man on radio) 'Heavy fighting is reported'

'in the Vardar Valley where..'

(Zepp) 'What's doing, Joe?'

How come you're not in uniform?

Well, got a couple of weeks before i go to camp.

- Oh. - Ain't got any place to flop.

- Okay, if i stay on the boat? - 'Sure, why not!

Thanks. How you coming with the bankroll?

I got a crack at the biggest bankroll in New York

if it works.

(Zepp) 'What's holdin' it up?'

An iceberg, but i'll melt her down.

Yeah. Is it okay if i get something to eat?

Sure. Go down the galley, see what they got.

(Zepp) 'Thanks, Joe.'

Thanks a lot!

Boss, when you clean out a guy like Zepp

you hadn't oughta keep him around.

Is that any way to treat a soldier?

But i'm tellin' you, chief..

Crunk..

...never give a sucker an even break

and always keep an eye on a pal.

Tsk, tsk, remember that!

Hey, where can i get a car?

I got to put on the dog for a few days.

I know a fella in town who has got a sedan.

Yeah, well get it and meet me on the dock in half hour.

Okay, chief.

[engine rumbling]

[honking]

- So long, Crunk. - So.. Joe!

[Joe whistling]

Well, we'll just have to sell some more tickets, darling.

I wish i knew how.

Even if you sold the whole lot

it wouldn't be half enough.

[intercom buzzing]

- Yes? - 'Ms. Bryant!

(woman on intercom) There's a recruit out here in the office.

'I don't know what to do about it.'

Well, hang on to her, we can use anybody.

(woman on intercom) 'But, Ms. Bryant, it's rather a special case!

Well, send her in before she changes her mind.

You see her, dear. I've got a hundred things to do.

She may have scads of money and will buy blocks of tickets.

I'm her.

I've been thinking over what you said yesterday.

And i was, I was wondering why you couldn't

use me in this set up.

You mean you want to enlist in this organization?

Time for every man to do his bit.

If it wasn't for this weak heart, believe me, I'd--

- Arteries! - Arteries.

Same thing. How about it?

What about all this gambling

at the ball business?

Oh, I forgot it.

Too bad, great idea.

[clicks tongue] Yep, good for the cause.

Well, let it go.

[sighs] Well, as personnel officer, I have no right

to refuse any enlistment.

However, I think i should warn you.

We've had a few men before but they all asked

to be transferred to more active branches.

So many women around get on their nerves.

- Well, that won't bother me. - 'l might have known.'

Perhaps you'd better read this first.

We expect a lot of our workers.

Thank you.

Do you mind if i sit down, please, ma'am?

Oh, of course not.

How do you do? I gather from what's going on..

- You want to enlist? - Yes, ma'am.

You're sure you know what you're doing?

I'd do anything to help the cause. Anything.

(Steadman) 'l think that's wonderful. Don't you, Dorothy?'

We do need a man in this office. You said so yourself yesterday.

- Why waste time looking around? - Why indeed!

You're sure you know what you are doing?

- Definitely. - Perhaps you're right.

The discipline will be good for him too.

Now, you fill in the application and i'll go get you a button.

Thank you.

Sign on the bottom line, Mr. Basco-pollus.

Bascopolous! i didn't think you'd forget me.

I don't intend to.

- Like it? - "Like it?"

I'm fascinated.

Oh.

There you are.

Now, you're one of us, Mr..

- Bascopolous. - Oh, yes, of course.

- Bascopolous? Greek? - American!

- Naturalized. - Oh, yes.

Well, now you get to work.

Dorothy will take good care of you.

And you come and see me when you have a moment to spare

and tell me how you're getting on.

Yeah.

I think he's perfectly wonderful!

[chuckles]

- Everything's fixed. I'm in! - Stand up!

- Take your hat off my desk! - What?

Put out that cigarette!

Recruits are not allowed to smoke during office hours.

Put a fresh bottle of water on that cooler, please.

Uh, yes.

[grunts]

How would you like to begin with a propaganda project?

(Joe) 'Yes, sir, or madam.'

Do you know how to knit?

Knit?

(Dorothy) 'l asked you if you knew how to knit."

Knit?

In England, men who are incapacitated

knit without hesitation.

Knit?

Why, the best knitter i ever saw

was Wing Commander Barnstable.

He picked it up while he was in a plaster cast.

I don't knit!

That's exactly the attitude we're trying to combat.

Now, look here. I don't mind--

We want a group of obviously masculine men

to take up knitting.

Do it perfectly casually

in public places.

Do you think i'm strong enough?

(Dorothy) 'I'm quite serious.'

Half the women who were knitting for us last year

are now learning to drive ambulances and run buses.

Do i get to trim a hat?

You don't seem to have caught the idea of the organization

you've just joined, Mr. Bascopolous.

We're people who won't be able to get in

to the actual fighting.

We resent that fact.

So we take our resentment out in doing our best

to help when and how we can.

Well, I'm not backing out.

I can't knit because i don't know how.

- That settles it - Report to Mrs. Van Every.

She's our best instructor.

[sighs]

Or do i tear this up?

- Okay, knit. - And take your hat!

Okay, hat.

Hmm.

[door slams]

[inaudible chatter]

[inaudible chatter]

[inaudible chatter]

Now you just sit down with the rest of the girls

and i'll be glad to show you.

[indistinct chatter]

Now, let me look at your hands.

Yes, they're really very clever hands.

You should have no trouble at all.

Now the first thing you do is to learn

how to hold the needles.

Now you hold the knitting in this left hand so.

Yes, and now, here you take the needle..

We learn to keep those little piggies.

Oh, you take the needle and stick it so

into the stitch, you see?

And then make a loop and throw the yarn over

and bring it through.. Come, come, come, come!

[sighs] Uh-huh..

And here, now you try one, you see?

'Now, here hold the needle in this hand.'

Yes! Now you see how simple it is.

Hmm.

Tch-tch-tch.

Down.

Now i'm goin' to show you how to rib.

You knit one, just as you've been doing

and then, then you purl one.

Now this is a purl, not the kind that you pass before a swine.

[laughs] But P-U-R-L.

Now look here, you bring your needle so

from the back to the front..

That's the boy. Yes.

And throw the yarn over in front instead of back.

That's the difference between a purl and a knit.

There you did it, bless his heart.

Now, take it out. There you have it.

Now, you see. It's knitting one, purl one.

- Okay. - Knit one, purl one.

Be calm, be patient, be exact.

Oh.

(female #2) 'Well, you know if you know.'

[indistinct chatter]

(female #2) 'Well, you know if you know.'

[indistinct chatter]

[slams desk]

Uh..

Hey, uh, could you help me? I dropped me purl.

I'm beginning to like it.

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

(female #2) 'Well, you know if you know.'

(Van Every) 'You're my little pioneer'

'and pioneers are always particular'

'because of their great moral bravery.'

Uh, sure, moral brav..

- Boss, people are watching. - So what?

What do you want them to think?

Will you look out? I almost dropped a stitch.

- Ah, for Pete's sake's-- - Oh, pipe down.

Mrs. Van Every, this is the Crunk, my driver.

- How do you do, Mr. Crunk? - Take off your hat.

Take that cigarette out of your mouth.

Now, sit down!

- Give him the needles. - Oh!

Don't be alarmed, young man.

Let me look at your hands.

Go on, show the old goat your hands.

- Where's your moral bravery? - Let me see. Yes.

They look as though they've been quite skillful

at picking up things.

Now, the first thing you do is learn how to hold the needles.

- You hold this in this hand.. - Joe!

And then you hold the other needle so..

So you take the one gimmick and you stick it in here like this

and then you take the string and put it

between the two gimmicks, then you take it

and you just haul it off.

- That's all there is to it. - 'Hey, Crunk.'

This thing kind of gets you.

Did you show 'em how to purl?

I haven't gotten to that yet, boss.

- Oh. - You know, Joe..

You shouldn't had to leave me at that knittin' table

with all those wacky wrens.

Well, I had to.

I wanted to talk to the head of that joint

while that dame was out the way.

- How'd you do? - I think we're in.

She's gonna tell her where to get off tomorrow.

Hey, get to bed. We've got an early call in the morning.

How you makin' out with that iceberg, Joe?

Did you thaw her out yet?

I got a better idea. I'm workin' my way around it.

- Goodnight. - Goodnight.

[casino wheel rattling]

(Mr. McDougal) Now listen, lady, you accepted my blankets

and you didn't say nothin' about the cost.

Now, listen, I'm losing money on these as it is.

Say, what kind of people are ya?

Trying to get the best of me after you've made a deal.

That was not the understanding we had at all.

I'm only a house wrecker, lady, trying to get along.

'Now, I never would have tore down that hotel

'except on account i'm one of them blankets.

(female #3) 'Please don't shout so.'

- Oh, uh, good morning. - Good morning.

- What seems to be the trouble? - Well..

She owes me 2400 bucks, that's the trouble.

He's trying to charge us six dollars a piece

for these second-hand blankets.

I could've got 10 bucks.

Millions of refugees shivering

'in tents and this creature tries to hold us up.'

You ought to be ashamed of yourself raising your price

just because blankets are hard to get.

That's the old law of supply and demand, lady

and it ain't been repealed yet.

Six bucks a piece. Where's my check?

(female #3) 'l tell you, we haven't it in our account.'

Yeah, well, now let's not be too hasty.

Don't you think we ought to examine the blankets?

Oh, would you mind holding my knitting, please?

Thank you.

Oh, yeah, well, eh, pretty good stuff.

'I think that's a good six dollar value.'

But we haven't got it.

Oh.. Oh, well, that's the trouble, mister, uh..

- McDougal. - They haven't got it.

But look, you look like a pretty good sport.

I tell you what i'll do, I'll flip ya.

Uh, $12 or $4?

Oh, but we couldn't possibly afford $12.

Oh. Oh, uh, don't worry.

And if i lose, I'll pay for it out of my own kick.

I wouldn't want to have those shivering refugees

on my conscience.

Now, what do you say, Mr. McDougal?

- Twelve or four? - Yeah.

- You're on. Heads. - Yeah..

Oh, I'm sorry, I couldn't do it with that coin.

You see, it's got tails on each side.

I got it from a gambler. I wouldn't want to gyp ya.

See, you'd have lost.

Now, what do you say we do that old, uh..

- Behind the back? - Yeah, that.

- Yeah, sure, go on. - Okay.

- Now you're all ready? - I'm ready.

Alright, alright..

[indistinct chatter]

Well, look at that. We got the blankets for four dollars.

Now you got that much in the bank, haven't you?

- Yeah. - Now wait a minute.

You've got to give me another chance to break even.

- Double or nothing. - Oh, no.

I don't think I could do that, Mr. McDougal.

No, that wouldn't be right. Please..

Some of the mean guys in here don't like gambling.

- Well, alright, you ready? - I'm ready.

Double or nothing.

You know, that's a funny thing.

That wouldn't happen again in a thousand times.

Oh, well, it won't happen again to me.

Never mind, you'll sleep well tonight

because you did a good deed for a worthy cause.

Here.

Now, you're one of us.

"I have contributed

to War Relief Incorporated.”

I have been taken by War Relief Incorporated.

[women chuckling]

[applauding]

(Dorothy) What do you mean they won't unload the trucks?

Well, it so happens they're medical supplies, serums.

They're important to save lives.

(man on phone) "They say they have their orders.

Well, tell them what i said

and if there's any more trouble, call me back.

(man on phone) 'Alright, I'll try.'

Come in.

I've been trying to think of some way

to thank you for getting us the blankets.

[laughs]

Well, the percentage was in our favor.

The other guy was doing the guessing.

Mrs. Steadman was talking to me yesterday.

- 'Oh, yeah?' - About the gambling.

- It's off. - Oh, I get it.

- You still don't trust me? - No.

And ever since you first came in here

I've been trying to figure out why.

Look, what's a guy supposed to do?

Put his heart on a plate before you'll trust him?

What do you think you'll get out of this?

(Joe) 'l told ya, I'm just trying to do my bit."

That doesn't explain anything.

Well, I just don't like to talk about it, that's all.

Did you ever hear of the Vardar Valley?

-'In Greece?' - Yeah.

The name of Bascopolous goes back over 500 years

'in that section of the country.'

'How do i know what's happened to my brothers'

or my kid sister?

Do you think I like the idea of those guys

walking into my mother's little kitchen?

'I lie awake at nights trying to figure out how to help.'

'They turned me down for military service'

'so i do the next best thing'

Try to raise dough to get supplies

to those poor people.

So now you know.

Oh, I'm.. I'm terribly sorry.

Oh, that's alright, don't apologize.

I'm sorry i had to tell ya, that's all.

[indistinct chatter]

Oh, Mr. Joe! Mr. Joe!

- You forgot your knitting. - Oh, I mustn't forget that.

Oh, I can't thank you enough for what you've done for us.

Oh, that's alright. I'd do as much to a total stranger.

Mr. Bascopolous.

I have to go down to the dock.

We're having a little trouble about

getting some supplies unloaded.

Will you.. Will you go with me?

Sure.

We can use my car.

(Joe) 'Break it up, will you?'

'Hey, look out, fellas.'

Look out, fellas. Hey, buddy.

You call that purling? You dropped a stitch.

Wait till i tell Mrs. Van Every.

- 'Where to, boss?' - North River. Downtown.

[engine rumbling]

- Promise me something, Joe. - Hmm, what?

Never, never knit again, please.

Oh, you're asking a lot.

- What is that? - Mm? A roll of dimes.

- Why do you carry it? - Habit. Fits nice in your hand.

[car honking]

- Where's Mr. Comstock? - He went to use the phone.

I'm Ms. Bryant. I've come to take care of this trouble.

Would you please start unloading this truck

as quickly as possible

and i'll straighten it out with Mr. Comstock.

Okay, miss. Alright, boys.

Hey! Not so fast, brother.

Wait a minute.

The next time you touch that stuff

without this release in your pocket

you'll find yourself tangled up with the law.

I told you relief people it was pay on delivery.

That's what it says.

But we agreed to give it to you on Saturday.

I don't do business that way, sister.

Thirteen hundred bucks. That's what you owe me.

Do i get it now, or do i take

this stuff back to the warehouse?

But we can't pay you until Saturday.

Okay. Saturday will be ten percent more.

Oh, Mr. Comstock, I, I beg your pardon.

- Who's this? - Oh, well.

I work for Ms. Bryant.

And i think you ought to get what you're asking for.

- Joe! - Uh, yeah.

Now, if you've got a pen, I can give you my personal check.

How do i know your check's any good?

Oh, yeah.

Well, If i can get to a telephone

I can verify it for ya.

- Telephone up in the office. - Thank you.

No, no, no. Go ahead.

[engine revving]

[rattling]

Everything's okay, boys. All signed. Start unloading.

And grab.

Hello. Let's get back to the jute mill.

You misunderstood Mr. Comstock.

Nice fella. Family man.

What happened to your dimes?

I tipped the guy.

Did you have to hit him very hard?

What me, fight?

Go on, I'm a peace-loving citizen.

- Joe! - What?

Well, he might have killed you with that bailing hook.

Oh, don't be silly, it's a scratch.

Say, do you mind if we stop off at the tailors

so i can get him to sew my fiddle?

- Your what? - My fiddle and flute, my suit.

Oh, what kind of double talk is that?

Oh, it's a language i picked up in Australia.

Like, uh, hat, tit for tat.

Shoes, ones and twos.

[chuckles] Sounds like poetry.

Yeah, that's the idea. Jingles.

Like, uh, you're a girl, twist and twirl.

Oh, what are you?

Me, I'm a bloke, that's a heap a coke.

Oh, well, this twist and twirl is going to

take care of the heap of coke's, um..

Cabbage patch, scratch.

We'll stop at my house. It's on the way.

- Anybody home? - No.

So the Crunk and me are sitting in this coffee joint

when in comes a pot and pan with his cheese and kisses.

- Pot and pan, that's a man. - Yeah.

Cheese and kisses, that's the missus.

- Sure. - Ha-ha. Well..

Well, the Crunk said to me

"Pipe a highs at the i suppose on that guys torn

and strife in the tommy horner."

Oh, wait a minute, I'm lost. Pipe--

(Joe) 'Pipe a highs at.. Yeah, just pipe.

- Take a look.. - 'Yeah, at the i suppose..'

- Oh, the nose! - Yeah.

On that guys storm and strife in the tommy horner.

- On his wife...i-in the corner. - Yeah.

- 'Right' - Ha-ha-ha.

Well, what happened?

The guy came over and punched

the Crunk in the snoot.

- Why? - He was from Australia.

[both laughing]

Thanks, chum, I'll finish it myself.

Yes, sir.

Bang, bang, fella.

- 'Ms. Dorothy.' - Yes?

Shall i telephone for a bottle and stopper?

A what?

A copper in the American vernacular.

Why, Foster, don't tell me you've been to Australia?

That's where i met me storm and strife..

- Uh, Mrs. Foster-- - Oh..

Please forgive me, Ms. Dorothy, but are you aware

of the character of this gentleman?

Oh, I think so, why?

Do you know he carries a lady from Bristol?

A what?

In American parlance..

...a rod, if you get what i mean.

Oh, well, don't be alarmed, Foster.

I, I think it's part of his character.

He, he carries it for balance.

Yes, Ms. Dorothy.

[instrumental music]

How ya comin' with the fiddle?

How'd you do that, with a knife and fork?

[laughs] I never could sew.

You better take a lesson from Van Every.

Foster was quite alarmed.

He thought i should send for a bottle and stopper.

- What for? - The lady from Bristol.

Oh. Oh, that.

Well, I wouldn't feel dressed without one.

- You ever killed anyone? - Well, I'm too good a shot.

Hey, look, don't get me wrong. I'm a gambler, not a gangster.

- Tell me some more. - What?

- Some more jingle talk. - Oh, that.

Now look, if we were going together..

- Mm-hmm. - You'd be my briny marlin.

My darling, see?

Uh..

Then i'd be the guy who'd give you

that Simple Simon for your long and linger.

[laughs]

The guy who had given me the Simple Simon was my mother.

Ah, yeah.

More.

Well..

Bonny fair's your hair.

Dots and dies..

...the i suppose.

North and south.

Joe.

Take off your mask. You're with friends.

Oh, don't be silly.

Come on, briny marlin, don't play games.

I'm not.

Then don't give me those baby blues.

You think i brought you here because..

- Because.. - Didn't ya?

Or have you changed your mind?

We seem to be talking in circles.

Yeah, it so happens there's a difference of opinion.

Suppose we settle it with that game you played with McDougal..

- What, do you mean that, uh.. - Mm-hmm.

Okay. Well, uh..

- You ready? - Mm-hmm.

Alright.

[instrumental music]

Now, now, relax. Don't get excited.

- Which hand? - Neither.

Oh, come on, play fair. You got to guess.

Neither. Open them both.

Okay.

Well, it looks like you lost.

Oh, well, when you played it with McDougal, you..

Yeah, well, that was different.

Never give a sucker an even break

but don't cheat a friend.

'I believe in that. I live by it.'

You don't think I'd play phony with you?

Well, you lost.

Oh, but, I didn't know the rules of the game.

Okay.

Where's my tit for tat?

(Dorothy) 'Joe'

What?

Will you run the gambling concession at the ball?

Well, well. Are you sure you can trust me?

Now i know i can.

Okay.

You got a deal.

She laid it right in my lap. She asked me to run the games.

We're gonna clean up this town and clear for Havana.

- How much of a cut do we take? - No cut, we're taking the take.

- The gaff is on. Anything goes. - Oh.

Yeah, we'll leave 'em a little chicken feed.

Make it look legitimate.

Hey, I'm gonna need five or six grand

to get those games rolling

in case we get some hit and run players.

Any of you guys got a bankroll stashed away?

- Not a thing.. - Cigarette money..

Why don't you get it from the war relief people?

How would it look for the big shot to go around asking

those people, "Mama, give me a quarter to see the movie show?"

- 'Queer the whole thing.' - Where ya gonna get it, chief?

I'll pick it off a tree.

Come on.

Hey..

- I beg pardon, sir. - Mm.

Ms. Dorothy's just come in, sir.

-'Oh. Leave us alone, Foster! - Yes, sir.

- Hello, you old darling. - Come here, Dot.

Wait till i powder my "I suppose”

and comb my "Bonnet fair."

(Mr. Bryant) 'Where on Earth did you pick up such gibberish?"'

From Foster.

It's a wonderful slang, grandfather.

You should talk to him.

- I've been talking to Foster. - Oh?

Why do you mean, Dot, by bringing

a gangster into this house?

Oh, now, don't tell me

you're worrying about me, grandfather.

Mm, I'd give you odds against any seven gangsters in the city

but i don't want them coming to my house.

What were you doing with the unhappy wretch?

- Learning things. - Yeah?

Grandfather, I think you'd like him.

You two have a lot in common.

In the name of sweet reason, what?

- You're both tough. - What?

Oh, I know, you're tough

in a highly moral and civilized way

but fundamentally, it's the same thing. It's..

- It's character. - What nonsense!

What can you see in a fellow like that?

Joe is the first man i've ever met i'm afraid of.

- It's exciting. - See here, Dot.

This fellow hasn't been making advances to you, has he?

- Of course! He kissed me. - What?

Right on the north and south. I pretended to be angry but..

- The truth is, I liked it. - Now see here, Dot.

I will not have this sort of thing--

Oh, grandfather.

Don't worry, I'm quite safe.

Tsk. Get rid of him, child.

I will, as soon as he's served his purpose.

I agree with you. I think he'd be too hard to tame.

- Goodnight, grandfather. - Dot, what's his name?

A heap a coke, oh-ho, you'll never believe me.

Joe Bascopolous.

- Joe what? - Bascopolous.

Now do you wonder why i call him by his first name?

Goodnight, briny marlin.

(female #2) 'Well, you know if you know.'

[indistinct chatter]

Dorothy, we've had the busiest morning.

Suddenly, a solid stream of people

are wanting to buy tickets for the ball.

The telephones haven't stopped ringing.

Well, do you suppose they found out about the gambling?

Well, how could they?

Mr. Bascopolous told me emphatically not to tell anyone.

- Well, that's what he told me. - And you didn't tell anyone?

Well, I'd, I'd, I'd..

In the strictest confidence of..

[both stammering]

I'll get another 500 tickets by noon

or i'll get another printer.

- Good morning. - Hello, genius.

Oh, I didn't think you'd ever be late.

I've been downtown trying to charter a steamship.

- What's the matter? - That tit for tat.

- Don't you like it? - Like it?

I'm fascinated.

Oh, Veronica. Do we have $6000 in our checking account?

(Veronica) Of course, not dear. What for?

(Dorothy) 'Well, the war convoy commission'

'is expecting a freighter in Monday.'

But they won't hold it for us

unless we put down a $6000 deposit today.

Oh, dear.

Well, don't worry about it.

I'll send Mr. Hargraves my personal check.

'I can get it out of the proceeds Friday night.'

- You're a darling. - Hmm.

Say, would you like me to take that check downtown for you?

You could. Look up the commission.

Somewhere on Fulton Street.

- Hello, angel. - Now see here.

What's all this nonsense about gambling at your affair?

Why, where did you hear about it?

Where didn't i hear about it!

They're discussing it even on the floor of the exchange.

- Oh, that's wonderful. - Now, now.

Stop being frivolous. I know who's back of all this.

That scoundrel Bosco..

- Bosco something or other. - Now, grandfather..

- You're being absurd. - What?

I'll admit I was blockheaded at first too.

But that money's going to send a whole shipload of supplies.

Well, find some other way.

Now, didn't you tell me once

that Great Great Grandfather Bryant

used lotteries to raise money for the American Revolution?

That was different. I will not permit it.

Alright. Then you give us your personal check for $100,000.

Well, I'm not going to bribe you

and i'm not going to argue with you.

- I'm giving an order. - Oh, grandfather.

Stop being your age.

I refuse to have my name associated

with that of a, of a, of a common crook.

Now, remember, I've warned you.

Now i'm going to act.

[indistinct chatter]

Get out of here!

Get your greasy black head out of here!

Fair warning!

- Tickets for the ball? - Aah! Ah..

Hey, who's that old biscuit face?

My grandfather. And he isn't a biscuit face.

I don't think he likes me.

Oh, he goes off in a great fizz every now and then

but he settles down. Don't worry.

I'm not worrying.

This the check for the freighter?

Yes, give it to Mr. Hargraves personally.

'I want to be sure we get that boat.'

(Mr. Hargraves) 'The war convoy commissions form'

8B-127/0 acknowledging receipt

will be in the afternoon's post.

Goodbye, sir.

Are you gonna take that check?

I beg your pardon.

- What do you mean? - Oh, nothin'.

Nothin', except there's an ugly story spreading around town.

- A story? - Yeah. Yeah.

That you aren't cooperating with the relief organizations.

Not cooperat.. What on earth are you talking about?

I'd like to have your suggestions

as to how i can explain why that money that those ladies

need to finance their ball tomorrow night

must be given to you today.

But we had no idea there was any difficulty about the deposit.

Well, you can see how it looks.

And it looks bad.

Now, the heart of my organization

is very much with your people.

But there's certain members who think that Greece

China, Czechoslovakia could use some--

- What? - But then..

Perhaps that would put you personally

in a very awkward spot.

Oh, but my dear sir, I assure you that

as far as i'm concerned myself--

Well, maybe i shouldn't have spoken.

But those fine ladies of mine had faith in you, Mr. Hargraves.

Yes. Uh..

I-I take it you feel very strongly about this check.

I certainly do.

Well, now, let's see.

Uh, suppose i hold the ship without a deposit.

Oh, I wouldn't want you to break any rules.

Oh, no, no, no, I'm sure

that in this case, it's perfectly, um..

Well, I'll write a letter to Ms. Bryant to that effect and..

And return her the check.

Oh, I'll save you the trouble.

And you don't have to write a letter, Mr. Hargraves.

Your word's good enough for me.

- Oh, thanks. - It's a deal.

- Right. - Goodbye, Mr. Hargraves.

Goodbye.

What kind of thing is that?

(Mr. Hargraves) 'That? That's a hand-knitted tea cosy.'

Oh, hand-knitted, huh?

Pretty flowers. Tch.

- Nice piece of work. - 'Oh, glad you like it.'

- Regular needles? -'Oh, yes, yes!

Tch.

- Mr. Hargraves out there? - No, sir.

[typewriter keys clacking]

- Let him have the cash. - Yes, Mr. Bryant.

- How would you like it, sir? - Hmm?

- 'Yes, Mr. Bryant?" - Get me the police department.

(woman on phone) 'Yes, sir!

- Ms. Bryant? - Yes?

Where will i find Joe Bascopolous?

He isn't here.

Where's his desk?

Out there.

Wait!

I'm so glad you came.

My grandfather sent for you, didn't he?

I asked him to, I always thought

there was something wrong with Mr. Bascopolous.

What is it?

(male #1) 'We wanna have a little talk with him.'

Anything serious?

When a guy's been convicted three times

'carrying a gun is plenty serious.

Oh.

- Who's that? - Oh..

That's the man from the water company.

I've been expecting him all afternoon.

'Ask him to come in a minute.'

Well, inspector, it's about time you showed up.

I telephoned the water company several times today.

Is this your idea of reliability?

Three bottles and stoppers arrived this afternoon

'with no coolers.'

Three bottles and stoppers?

Is this the best service your office can give us?

'I've just about made up my mind to..'

'To take our business elsewhere.'

Where, for instance?

I think the Plaza Fountain place

will serve our needs in the future.

- 'Goodbye.' - Okay, lady.

Will you sit down, gentlemen? I'm afraid you'll have to wait.

What're you doin' with that, boss?

Looking for a glass.

Plaza Fountain, 59th.

Got a date with a smart girl.

[engine rumbling]

Well, put it there.

Why should the cops be trying to pick me up?

- Get in. - Why?

Grandfather.

You will carry a lady from Bristol.

Ah, they'd pick me up for packin' a rod.

I'd get sprung in a couple of hours.

- Come on, get in. - What for?

I got my own car waiting around the corner.

I've already told him to go home.

Put this on and don't ask questions.

Okay..

Say, we're not only out of town, we're out of the state.

So is it alright for me to ask questions now, please, teacher?

[laughs] I have to talk to grandfather.

- Well, he's back-- - On the phone.

Well, we've passed thousands of good phones.

Oh, this call must come from the right locality.

Grandfather's no fool.

Well, how far is the right locality?

Pretty far.

- Do you want me to drive? - If you don't mind.

[engine rumbling]

- Hold still a minute. - Hey!

There, I've wanted to do that

since the first moment i saw you.

What for?

I've had this in the car for several days

but i couldn't get up the courage to give it to you.

Oh.

Do you mind if i show you

how to tie it properly?

[honking]

[laughing]

Look.

- You hold this end. - Yeah.

Keep your eye on the road.

Well, how can i look and keep my eye..

You start tying an ordinary knot.

- Yeah. - But instead..

You go over to the other side..

Mm.

Down..

Then you go all the way around..

- Yeah.

- And you finish tying the tie. - Oh.

They call it a Windsor knot.

Oh, they do, huh?

Oh, take it easy. Just a minute.

There. Isn't that much better?

Kinda big, isn't it?

Well, it's better than that stingy little

nub of a nothing you wear.

Do you like the tie?

Yeah, I suppose so.

Well, say thank you.

Alright, thank you.

How long has it been since anyone had any control over you?

Nobody ever had.

And nobody ever will.

And i'm tying my own knot.

[instrumental music]

- Where do i turn on the lights? - They're not connected.

(Joe) Oh.

Hey, is this the old man's place?

(Dorothy) Mine. It comes from the other side of the family.

The side that was always getting into trouble.

(Joe) Well, it's the kind of trouble i'd like to get into.

(Dorothy) Hmm.

Lend me your matches, Joe.

Yeah.

Well, what's this?

Just a little sitting room.

It's alright.

This is where i used to entertain my beaus.

After tea, we'd sit in front of the fire and hold hands.

Will you light the fire, Joe?

[instrumental music]

- 'Hello?" - Operator?

- 'Yes, who's this?' - Oh, it's alright.

- This is Ms. Bryant. - 'Oh, how are you, miss?

- 'Oh, I'm fine, thank you.' - 'Who do you want, Ms. Bryant?"

(Dorothy) 'I want to talk to my grandfather in New York.'

(female #4) 'You want me to patch..'

'Yes, that's the number. Will you ring?"

For a family that was always

gettin' into trouble, they did alright.

[chuckles] Oh.

Well, it's just that they never

seemed to behave the way

people expected them to.

Look at them. The crazy darlings.

Maybe it will give you some idea of why i don't make sense.

[chuckles] What did he do?

(Dorothy) 'Well, he was a great admirer of the ladies.'

-'Ah..' - 'He was a hunter.'

(Dorothy) And maker of 19th century love.

- Where'd he get his dough? - From him.

He wrote poetry, privately printed at his own expense.

Yeah? Where'd he get his dough?

From him.

He wasted his entire life trying to spend the family fortune.

- It finally killed him. - Well..

Where's the guy who made all the dough in the first place?

Over here.

My great, great grandfather.

From log cabin to riches.

Know how he died?

He was shot in a mill at Harpers Ferry.

He joined John Brown and his fight to free the slaves.

He was a slave owner himself

but he listened to a crazy Yankee farmer

and caught fire from his words.

Oh, the family had quite a time living him down.

They did, huh?

[telephone ringing]

Hello?

[indistinct chatter]

Oh. Well, will you call me

when you get a line through? It's quite important.

- 'Yes, ma'am.' - Thank you.

[instrumental music]

What are you gonna use for an argument when you get him?

Oh, I'm not going to say much.

He's going to do most of the talking.

He's going to tell me about your three convictions

'and i'm going to tell him i don't care.'

What three convictions?

Oh, don't pretend, Joe, it's alright.

No, no. What are you talking about?

I know all about it. The policeman told me today.

Go on, I never took a rap in my life.

Please, Joe, be honest.

Well, alright, I haven't always been on the level

but i've kept my ears clean as far as John Law was concerned.

[telephone ringing]

- Hello? - 'Hello?

- Grandfather? - 'I've been worried about you.'

Now don't get excited, I'm in Maryland.

- 'Oh, yeah! What?' - Maryland.

(Mr. Bryant over phone) 'Well, what on earth are you doing in Maryland?'

You sent those policemen to the office today, didn't you?

(Mr. Bryant over phone) 'l did indeed.'

'I'm going to have that blaggard'

'put behind bars'

'for the rest of his natural life.'

You know the laws of Maryland, don't you?

[indistinct chatter over phone]

Well, unless you give me your word of honor

the police will be called off

I'm going to marry him.

- 'What?! - 'Marry him.'

- 'You can't..' -'0Oh, I can't, can't i?"

[indistinct chatter over phone]

I'll give you just ten seconds

to make up your mind.

'One, two, three'

four, five..

- Six, seven.. - 'You're trying to bluff me.'

- Well, call my bluff then. - 'No, wait.'

Eight, nine..

- 'No.' - Time's up.

'I don't want any scandal, Dot.'

- Give me your word then. - 'If that's what you want.'

Your solemn word.

(Mr. Bryant over phone) 'Oh, alright.!

Thank you, darling. Don't worry.

Goodnight.

Well, didn't i tell you to leave it up to me?

- Yeah, you were great. - Well, it worked!

Why wouldn't it work?

You had a swell club to smack him with.

- Me! - Joe..

You think the worst thing that could happen to you

is to marry me?

To people like you, folks like me are animals.

We're so bad.

And you're so very good.

What do you expect, credit for it?

How could you be anything else

with what you had to start out with?

You ought to be horse whipped if you didn't turn out right.

And what are you so high and mighty about?

What did you ever do?

He's the guy who made all your dough for you

and he was born in a log cabin.

You know where i grew up?

In a one-room shack with a dirt floor.

You talk about this side of your family

and that side of your family.

As far as i know, we only had one side

and it was awful poor.

Lots of times, there wasn't what for to eat.

That's why i ran away when i was nine.

I got tired of being hungry and seeing my old lady

go hungry until she died.

- Oh, please, Joe. - Oh, I'm not complaining.

It's okay with me.

But i just got a lesson in what gives with your kind of people.

My kind?

I just know that your kind can look through me

like i was a pane of dirty glass.

Oh, it's not me, Joe, it's, it's people like grandfather.

I thought you knew how i felt.

Sure, I know. Anything for the cause.

[chuckles] I'm not kidding myself, sister.

I know how i stand with you after you cash in on me.

You're wrong about me, Joe.

[instrumental music]

Come on.

We can quarrel all the way back to New York.

(Dorothy) Will you scatter the fire?

[music continues]

You meant that about me being wrong.

I should have slapped your face.

Why didn't you?

'Cause you would have slapped mine back.

I don't know what to make of a dame like you.

Neither do i.

Yes, I do.

[music continues]

Hey. Hey.

You're home.

(Dorothy) You'd better take the car, darling.

Okay.

Won't you say something?

[music continues]

Don't you like it?

I don't know.

I don't know whether i like it or not.

[car door closes]

[instrumental music]

[tires screeching]

He says, I don't quite understand it

but he says that, he says he's a heap of coke.

- A heap of.. - That's what he said, miss.

[music continues]

Hey, tie that thing again for me, will ya?

[instrumental music]

Yeah, I liked it!

(Joe) 'I don't want any slip-ups.'

'Start spreading at 7:30, ready to spring at 8:00."

The Crunk here will be in the cage.

He's got six G's to start the games with.

I'm taking the cash boxes with the false bottoms

over to the hotel myself, Joe.

Well, see those dames don't get their hands on 'em.

Hey, watch that!

Soon as we fold, everybody back to the boat.

Well, that's all.

- Hey, Swede. - 'Yeah!

Are you set to sail tonight?

I've ordered the tugs and the tide will be just right.

Good.

'Swede, what do you know about Bascopolous?'

'I don't mean me, the sailor that kicked off. My namesake.'

(Swede) 'Well, nothing much, Joe. Why?'

(Joe) 'Oh, I just got an idea I might have got somebody wrong.'

(Swede) 'A letter came for him the other day.'

(Joe) 'Hey, Crunk, give me that shirt. For Bascopolous?'

(Swede) Yeah, I was gonna tear it up.

'Wait a minute, I've got it on me here somewhere.'

- 'Yeah, here it is! -'Open it up.

- What's it say? - It's in Greek.

Hmm. Anybody on the boat read Greek?

- No. - Too bad.

I'd like to know about that guy.

- I tell you what you can do. - What?

There's a little Greek church about a block from the pier.

Why don't you drop in and have the priest read it to you

on your way uptown?

Yeah, I might do that.

I came to say so long, Joe. Got my call for tomorrow.

- Hmm. Want to go to our party? - No, thanks.

- Need any dough? - Nah, I'm okay.

Alright, soldier, all the luck.

Thanks, Joe.

[choral singing]

[singing continues]

Uh..

You wish to see me?

Yeah, father. I got a letter here.

It's written in Greek. I can't read Greek.

Kind of in a hurry, but i'll pay you if you'll read it for me.

You can drop it in the poor box as you go out.

I'm here to help those who need it.

[choral singing]

From your mother, hmm?

Oh.

Yes, so it is.

Your mother has a very good name.

Maria, a holy name.

"Joseph, my beloved son.

"God grant this letter reaches you.

"Always you have broken my heart

"by the wicked things you have done.

"Yet surely when you hear of the terrible thing

"that has happened to those who love you

"I believe that God will open your eyes

and cleanse your heart."

That's enough, father, thanks.

I just wanted to know who it was from.

"I write to tell you

"of my great pride in my other sons

"your brothers.

"Now it must be your pride too

"as well as your sorrow.

[clears throat]

"It happened two Sundays ago

"as we were coming from church.

"There was a roaring in the sky

"and suddenly, great parachutes

"began to drift down

"toward the meadow below the village.

"We were too startled to do more than stare

"with open mouths.

"Save for your brother, Petros.

"His face grew black with anger.

"Men of Greece,' he shouted to the others.

""The carrion birds are falling upon our flocks.'

"'Come with me.

"There were five guns in our village

"but there were pitchforks and scythes

"and men of great strength.

"Your brother Petros and your brother Euladio

"led the other men into the meadow.

"There were patches of white lilies..

"...and before the hour was done

"it was as though the field were covered

"with red lilies.

"Not one of our men lived.

"But a 100 Germans died..

"...and Greek honor lived for an added hour.

"They possess our village, of course.

"I earn food by making their beds

"and washing their dishes at the inn.

"Yet i am sustained by my God

"and my great pride.

Thy mother, Maria."

'May God comfort you.'

Let's say a prayer together.

Kneel down.

Our Father, thou who seest all human suffering

we beseech thee to bring consolation

to the heart of this mother.

And to all the mothers

of this war-torn world.

And to the hearts of their sons..

...bring courage

and the will to oppose evil

as this woman hath brought it

to her son Joseph

who in thine eyes

is the brother of all men.

[choral singing]

[instrumental music]

(Dorothy) 'Joel!'

Do you know what time it is?

Why have you stayed away?

Have any trouble with the old man?

He's out of town.

He told Foster he was going to Washington

to find Mr. Hargraves.

- How's the party? - Awful!

- Look, there's nobody here. - Yeah.

- What? - It's wonderful.

Everyone's upstairs and they're simply

throwing away money.

Dance with me?

Later.

[music continues]

[knock on door]

- Hi, boss. - Hello, Joe.

Where have you been all this time?

- Hello, Joe. - Hello, J--

Going to let me win today, Joe?

Hello, Joe. Haven't seen you since Rio.

- What happened to that boat? - Going south this winter?

- Hello, Joe. - Hello, Joe.

(Veronica) 'We're not gonna win..'

'Oh!'

- Oh, hello. - Oh!

Hiya, boss.

I was gonna send Herbie out to look for you.

How's it coming?

Just like shooting fish in a barrel.

Open up.

- Just passed the 100,000 mark. - Get me 6 G's.

You sure picked a soft touch, boss.

Our grab oughta be over 200 grand.

[chuckles]

You ever sit on a park bench

for two hours and look at yourself?

- Our grab is nothing! - Huh?

But i thought you said we were taking the whole thing.

(Joe) "I'm keeping enough to pay off the boys!

- The rest goes to war relief! - But, Joe..

You don't mind if i double cross myself, do you?

[knock on door]

See who that is.

Let go. Gotta see Joe.

Listen, Joe, there are a couple

of parole officers down at the boat.

- What have they got on you? - Not me, J. Bascopolous.

'It turns out he was a three time loser'

'under the Baume's law.'

- Three convictions? -'Yeah'

'I knew that'd put you on the spot'

so i checked up.

I found this letter from the parole board.

Some old clothes he left behind.

One more rub with the law

and Bascopolous goes up for life.

- You better beat it, Joe. - Not tonight.

Oh, I'd stall them off but suppose they come here?

My neck's clean.

Uh, it worries me, Joe.

Hey, you got a roscoe on you, ain't you?

- Sure. - You better stash that, boss.

- Why take a chance? - Okay.

- Thanks for the tip. - That's alright, Joe.

'If there's anything I can do to help you..'

Sure, stick around.

If you see those bulls in the crowd

give me the office.

How we doin', checker upper?

When the boss ain't here, this cage is private.

Okay, Crunky.

So, it's private.

Who's in the gas box?

The sandwiches are for the boys.

Ah, I think i'll have a talk with them.

I mean the boys, not the sandwiches.

- Hiya, boys! - Hello, Zepp!

What's the matter, Briny Marlin?

- Bed? -I woke up.

Something happened to me too.

Yeah, what?

I was struck by lightening.

Nobody dancing.

Does it matter?

[instrumental music]

Remember this..

...I didn't lie to you

but you were right and i was wrong.

For me you're right, always.

You'll get everything you want.

You'll get enough to fill two ships.

Maybe three.

There's something else I want.

Now, you stay away from guys like me.

You'll only get hurt.

I'm clearing out tonight.

Take me with you, Joe.

Dot, I believe you know Mr. Hargraves.

This is Captain Costello of the police department.

They're here at my request.

Grandfather, you broke your word.

Nothing of the kind.

Captain Costello's here

to stop this gambling.

But first, I'm going to prove to you

what this blaggard is.

- Do you know he's a thief? - Grandfather!

He cashed your check for $6000.

Did you get the money, Hargraves?

I did not. I thought he tore up the check.

Relax, chum. You were out of town.

I couldn't find you. Here, 6,000 even.

Well i.. I suppose i really..

That's alright. Don't apologize.

- Everything clear now? - No!

Everything's not clear. Not until you get out of here.

I want this gambling stopped.

And i don't want any scandal, Dot.

But if you don't stop it immediately

I'll have to get these officers to do it for you.

Alright.

You're far enough ahead.

Send the committee to the cage.

We'll count up.

Dot, my child, I--

Excuse me, I have to find the committee

and send them up.

(male #2) 'All bets down'

- Stop the betting. - Make this your last game.

- Oh, no! - Oh, no!

Tom, we're closing up, have the dealers

bring the cash boxes into the cage.

Yes, sir.

- Monty, stop the playing. - Okay, Joe.

That'll be all, ladies and gentlemen.

[indistinct chatter]

[knock on door]

Crunk, we're cl..

The law's downstairs.

We're closing up the games.

Where's the Crunk?

[door thudding]

(Zepp) Who'd you think you were fooling, Joe?

We knew that dame had the ring through your nose

since the first night.

I'm declaring myself back in the old partnership.

Any arguments?

'All that parole board needs to know'

'is that Bascopolous operated this scam'

'and those one-way doors clank shut for good.'

I can prove i'm not Bascopolous.

Okay. Then you're Joe Adams, the draft dodger.

That's good for ten years in Leavenworth.

'You've gotta be a good boy, Joe.'

Okay. I know when i'm licked.

Here come the dames to check up.

Let 'em in.

When those cash boxes come in

don't fool around with those false bottoms.

'Cause things might happen.

[knock on door]

Oh, Mr. Bascopolous, isn't it wonderful?

I'm utterly impoverished and utterly happy.

Everyone's penniless.

Ladies, these are some of our boys.

- How do you do? - How do you do?

Oh, here come the cash boxes.

Crap table three.

Step up and check your profits.

- Now, how does this one open? - 'Crap table number one.'

Oh, what lovely money. It's just like Christmas.

Not very much.

38, 39, 40, 41..

Why, it's only 41 dollars.

We had very bad luck the last hour.

Only $94.

- Bad night, lady. - 'Roulette number one.'

(Mary) 'Maybe this one will be nice and full.'

(Veronica) 'I think this feels a little heavier.'

[indistinct chattering]

A hundred and twenty, one, two. I can't believe it.

What are we going to tell people?

- Better think up something. - Oh, this is awful!

Mary, how much have you got?

Oh, Veronica, only 208 dollars.

Oh!

- Is that the last box? - That's all.

- 87 dollars. - Eight seven.

What's the total?

I'll have it in a moment.

[knock on door]

Joe. Joe, how much did we make?

They're adding it up now.

Eight hundred and twelve dollars total!

- Oh! - Run of bad luck for the house.

But enormous sums changed hands. I saw it.

Nothing you can do about it now.

Well, there's something I can do about it.

There's a policeman downstairs.

Wait a minute!

I knew we were losing..

...but i didn't think it would be this bad.

But how did you know?

Joe told me.

Didn't you, Joe?

That's right.

I-I've known for the last hour.

But, Dorothy, you know perfectly--

No, I don't.

We'd better go downstairs and make up a story.

[indistinct chatter]

Alright, boys. Get busy on the boxes. Come on.

So you tipped off the dame they were losin', huh?

- Yeah. - What do you figure the take?

Around 200 G's.

Alright, boys, leave the dough on the desk.

Get back to the boat.

Gaffer...pay off those extra dealers.

Start moving out the equipment.

Come on, roll it up. Let's get going.

You roll it up. I trust you.

[knock on door]

(Dorothy) 'Joe!

Don't let her in, Joe!

She might get hurt. Remember this is your gun.

[knock on door]

Joe, let me in please.

Joe, I..

Oh, Joe!

I lied because i couldn't live thinking of you locked up.

But whether i live or die

I can't let you take that money, Joe.

Get her out of here.

Please, give it to me.

It doesn't belong to either one of us.

Give it to me and get away.

Get her out of here!

Wait a minute. Look..

You just aren't any good, are you?

You never were any good.

I've got to take that money, Joe!

- No! No! - Joe, let me go!

Now i recognize you, Joe boy.

Come on, let's slam.

[gunshot]

- Open up! - Open up the door!

- 'Open up! - 'Open up the door!

[indistinct chatter]

[knock on door]

[cars honking]

[indistinct chatter]

[dramatic music]

- Mr. Bryant! Mr. Bryant.. - Yes.

- Are you alright, my dear? - Oh..

Call an ambulance. Get that man to a hospital.

Right away, sir.

[music continues]

Baby, you've got nine lives.

I'll have that slug out of you in a minute.

Here, bite on this.

'How do you feel?"

Fine, chum.

(male #3) 'Hold it.'

[groans]

[indistinct chatter]

[knock on door]

Mr. Bryant is out, madam, and Miss Dorothy isn't--

You needn't bother to announce us, Foster, we'll go right up.

I'm afraid Miss Dorothy won't see you, madam.

[knocks on door]

Dorothy.

- 'Dorothy! - Yes?

I've been trying to reach you all morning.

We've got to make some sort of statement to the newspapers.

Have you seen the morning papers? Isn't it awful?

I haven't seen the papers.

(Veronica) 'Then you haven't heard about our freighter?'

'It was sunk before it even got here.'

(Mary) 'So even if we had the money, we couldn't send the supplies.

Poor dear. It's been quite a shock.

Well, we better decide what we're going

to tell the reports ourselves.

After all, I made the decision to allow the gambling.

- It's all my fault. - I know.

But what could we possibly tell them?

Well, we can make a dignified statement.

We were taken in.

Mary, Veronica..

Ask the reports to come into the library.

I, I'll see them myself, alone.

Oh, no, Dorothy.

This is none of it your fault. It's-it's all mine.

- But, I'm just as responsibl-- - No, you're not.

There's only one thing for me to do and that's tell the truth.

Ask them to come in, will you?

Well, she's not gonna see them without me.

Nor me.

Oh, Foster, ask the reporters to go into the library.

Miss Dorothy will see them there.

Yes, madam.

Hold it!

Oh, please..

Don't let 'em in. I want to see Miss Bryant.

Are you Miss Bryant? No, you wouldn't be.

- Neither would you. - Miss Bryant's in her room.

- She's not seeing anybody. - She'll see me.

I've got a bundle for her.

You can leave it with me, if you wish.

Well, I don't wish!

I'll give it to her myself.

Where's her room?

- Excuse me, ladies. - Just a moment!

[gasps] What's this?

What's it look like?

[sighing]

- Oh! - Yeah.

You'd be the one alright.

- This money's for you. - Wait!

Wait a minute. Where is he?

- Where's who? - Where did you get the money?

Well, a man I met in the park asked me to bring it for you.

Oh, you're lying to me. Where is he? Where's Joe?

Joe? I don't know any Joe.

What did he look like, the man who gave you the money?

I don't know. Never saw him before in my life.

Oh, wait a minute..

[clamoring]

- What happened, Swede? - Where'd you get that butt?

Oh, I promoted it off a guy.

One cough out of you and you'll fill this seat with oatmeal.

- Look, what happened? - Not a thing.

- Did it go alright? - Why wouldn't it?

How did she look?

Just like you said, Joe.

That's how she looked.

Hello. Yes?

But have you checked all the hospitals?

Yes, keep looking.

Now, see here, Dot. This has got to stop.

You're looking ill.

[sighs] I know you mean well, grandfather

but please, won't you go away? Leave me alone.

And if you did find him, what could you do?

What could i do?

I'd put my arms around him

and never let go.

Oh, fiddlesticks!

Hello.

Harbor has just telephoned, darling?

Our relief ship is ready to sail, isn't it wonderful?

You know, it's the luckiest thing our getting that ship.

- And the wonderful publicity. - Mm-hm.

The war relief is the talk of the town.

Donations are simply pouring in.

[clears throat] Yeah.

You know, Dot, I haven't been feeling very well lately.

I've been counting on you to go for a little trip

with me down south.

What do you think of that. Hm?

Palm Beach, for instance, for a few weeks.

What do you think of it?

[clears throat]

- Hiya, Mr. Bryant. - 'Oh, how do you do?"

Morning, Miss Bryant.

Well, we solved that case for you.

He's dead!

[dramatic music]

- Who's dead? - Bascopolous.

He was a wrong guy alright. Look at that record.

Three years at San Quentin, two at Leavenworth

five at Sing Sing

and a whole list of petty violations.

- Oh! Oh, no-- - What's the matter?

- This-this isn't-- - That's not Bascopolous?

- No. - That's him alright!

Me and Sam checked our facts

with the coroner's office.

We also checked it with the captain

of the gambling boat he was on.

'We couldn't find the owner. He was missing.'

'The boat was missing, too. But we finally ran it down.'

'Over at pier 48, they're loading a ship'

'called the Briny Marlin'

'with medical supplies from this office.

What?

What, what did you say the name of the ship was?

The Briny Marlin. At least, that's what they call it now.

[instrumental music]

[ship horn blaring]

Where's Joe?

Where's Joe?

Please tell me where Joe is!

Joe. Joe, take me with you, please darling.

'I love you. Please take me with you.'

You don't belong with a grifter like me.

You just got some mud on your dress, that's all.

Give it time. Let it dry.

It'll brush off.

Oh, no, Joe. Joe, I love you!

Please, take me with you!

Joe! Please, Joe!

'Joe.. Please, Joel'

[sobbing] Joe, wait!

Goodbye, Briny Marlin.

[instrumental music]

Joe! Joe!

[ship horn blaring]

Now that was the end of it.

Uh, what, what happened to the Greek?

Just what he said would happen.

He delivered the stuff, then he joined the merchant marine.

Coming back the Briny Marlin

drew a dead heat with a German torpedo.

[chuckles] Funny a guy like him winding up that way, huh?

Can't kill a fella like Joe.

"Anyway, we've been home ten days now.

That's why i'm hanging around.

He went uptown for a while, I told him i'd meet him here.

I knew she was gonna be here and i was kinda hoping.

Oh, yeah. I see what you mean.

Yeah.

[whistling]

- Hey, Swede, where you been? - Waiting for you, that's all.

Come on, Joe, the dinghy's at the end of the pier.

- Let's get back to the ship. - Changed my mind.

We're not going back to the ship tonight.

- Ah, listen, Joe.. - Come on.

It's our last night ashore.

I got a cab waitin' outside.

We're goin' uptown.

Okay, Joe.

Hey, wait a minute, one of you guys

'got to do somethin' about this.'

- About what? - Look..

You've got a dinghy tied up at the end of the pier.

It can't stay there. It's against regulations.

'It's a menace to navigation.'

Hey, that's right.

One of you is got to row it back to this end of the slip.

Okay. Go ahead, Joe.

Why should 1?

(Swede) 'l could order you to, you know.'

Yeah, but you wouldn't.

(male #4) 'Well, one of you got to do it.'

Hey, why don't you flip for it? You're a gambler, ain't ya?

Yeah, I've done a little gambling in my time.

I-I got one.

Okay. Now, heads, you bring the dinghy back.

And tails, he does. What do you say?

Uh, it's the only way you're going to settle it.

Why not?

- Okay, you got a deal. - Okay.

Heads it is.

[Joe whistling]

Joe.

Joe!

[instrumental music]

Thanks, pal!

[instrumental music]