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- Thanks so much for having us this weekend, Jack.

- Yeah. - Oh, thank Aunt Linda.

It was all her doing.

- Are her directions crazy?

- They're super, super vague.

- And ridiculous bullet points.

But I think it's okay.

We'll figure it out. We're smart.

Sometimes.

- Oh, that's such a cute little dinky bike.

- Whoa. - Whoa.

- Whoa. What's this?

Human testing over here? What's going on?

- Let's see what she says. It's, uh...

Our only access is via fence key,

'cause it's a gated community, James.

- Oh. - Oh, fancy.

- Spencer pack a bag--

- This is so cute, I can't even deal with it.

- I think this--

I think this is it. Yeah.

- Here? - Yeah.

- This is it? - I think so, yeah.

- This is cute.

- Is this it? - Yeah, it's nice.

- Oh, this is cool.

- It's gorgeous.

- You've been here before, Jackie?

- Uh, when I was, like, six.

Um... Okay.

- It's beautiful.

- You looking for the key?

- Yeah, "the key to the front door will be

underneath a potted plant on the left side of the door."

- Well, let's just see if it's unlocked.

- It's not here.

- Huh.

- Maybe it fell? Is it somewhere else?

Maybe check around. - It is definitely locked.

- Do you want to call her?

- Uh, yeah. That's a good idea.

- It's a potted plant for the lock?

- Yeah.

- Maybe it fell?

- Right.

- Hey, what are you doing?

- James, what are you doing?

- Hey, what are you doing?

Rugged explorer.

- Please don't do what you're about to do.

- I'm not doing anything, Jacqueline.

- I-- - know that to be false.

- Your aunt should lock the windows.

- This is a gated community.

Can you take off your shoes, please?

At least?

Thanks for showing me.

- Constantly.

- Well, I guess at least we're in.

- Yeah. - I got that.

- That was great. - I'll go through the window.

- Good job. Oh, thanks.

- All right. - Nice.

- Just stick it on the table over here.

- They just let guys like you into places like this?

- This is nice. - Yeah, they just do it.

- It's beautiful. - Thanks.

- Yeah, this is really nice. - Yeah, it's really pretty.

- Yeah.

- Do we put out the sign when we go to the beach?

- Yeah, and two windows. - Jackie.

- Oh, we're gonna-- we're gonna take this room.

That was fast.

- Uh... we're taking this one.

- Are we? - Yeah.

- All right then. See you.

- Okay.

- I guess this is us. - Okay.

Oh, it's nice. Oh, yeah.

- Yes.

- There's your bag. - Got the--

Oh, thank you for holding it.

You're the best bellman I've ever, ever known.

- Oh, really? - Yeah.

- That's a-- that's a hell of a compliment.

- Yeah, you could have been that guy

in "The Grand Budapest Hotel."

- No, really? - You know, the little--

- Well, I wish.

- Soon you'll run the whole hotel.

- Yeah, that's true.

- James couldn't even close the window...

- Aww. - When he was breaking in?

- He saved the day.

- Yeah, he did.

We're here.

Yes, we are.

- Ugh. Oh, and it's nice to, like, be inside now.

- Yeah, it is.

Um... so we're going to the beach later?

- Yeah, bike ride at the beach? Are you kidding me?

- That's-- we're gonna do that?

We're not just gonna...

I mean, it's--

- Yeah, it's just, like, right up the way.

It'll be great to go out there. - Okay.

Good, good, good, good, good.

This is neat. Nice little...

Yeah ha ha!

We really got time...

Get the--

- Hello, salty beach.

- Hello, little island.

- Hello, the non-gay part of this beautiful island.

- We're here

- You're so far away from me.

I know.

- We'll reach across the way.

- I'll just put my pillow on this side.

- Okay.

- And then you can put your pillow on this side.

- We can just kiss across the way.

Just dainty little good night kisses.

- All right, before I crash,

I'm gonna get unpacked a little bit.

- Okay.

Good old mom.

- Yep, Cindy's ringtone.

We're here, Cindy.

You know, she needs one of those

GPS tracking systems on you.

You know?

I have arrived.

So what's the plan?

Uh, beach.

- Beach? - Yeah.

- All right.

Hey. - Sorry, I'm--

Whenever she calls me, I just, like, start thinking about it.

It's like...

- It's okay. - In my head.

And it's like--

Sorry. I'm done.

- No, no, no, you don't have to be done.

That's all right. - Yeah.

- It's okay to think about it, you know?

- Yeah. Think about it out here with me.

You know, with us. In the present.

Not just in here.

Come out. Hey.

"Hey, Spencer, come out and play.

Let's go."

I'm proud of you.

Thanks.

- Hey. - Let's go to the beach.

- I love you.

- I love you.

I do.

- Come on.

You think they're ready for these?

- If they're ready for these. - Mm.

- Hey, guess what.

- What?

- We've been here, like, six minutes, let's say.

- Mm-hmm.

- Um, your sister and her

grandpa-sweater-wearing boyfriend...

- Mm-hmm. - Are boning.

Already. - Oh, my God.

- Like, really getting into it.

- They're in the honeymoon phase.

They can't keep their hands off each other.

It's gonna be the whole weekend like this.

Kids.

- I can't believe I just heard her have sex.

- I'm surprised you haven't before.

- Yeah.

That's interesting.

Do you have, um,

like, toothbrush and toothpaste stuff

you want me to bring over there?

It's in here.

I'm so stuck. - That's just not gonna work.

All right. Well, thanks.

It was a good delivery system. - You're welcome.

You're welcome.

- Chh-chh-chh-chh...

Um...

Hey, what's this doing here?

- Um...

I don't know.

Surprise?

- Yeah.

- It's-- - Is it the one?

- Yeah.

What else would it be?

- I mean, I don't know.

Has it been sitting in a drawer for three years?

- Yeah. - Where was it?

- In the bottom of the dresser.

I was looking for my bathing suit--

- It has a head. Oh, my God.

- Well, I mean, I totally forgot that we had it,

but then it was there, and I was like, "Oh, my God."

- Yeah, but... - "The rainbow dong."

- What possessed you to bring it?

- I don't know. I thought it'd be fun?

- I can't even-- I can't touch it.

- No? - Anymore.

- Not even a little bit? - No.

It's--what a weird thing.

Why did you bring it?

- Why not?

- Ugh. I mean--

All right. Well...

You want to go to the beach? Let's go to the beach.

- Sure.

- Do you have your suit and stuff?

- Um, yeah, it's in my bag.

- I'll meet you out there. - Okay.

- Got to work on my quads. - Yeah, you do.

- Well, no, you're supposed to say, "Your quads look great."

- Your quads look great. You need to work on 'em.

Thank you.

Yeah, I just got to get them in.

- You guys ready? - All right.

- All right, we're ready to, uh...

- Hey, what are you-- - What are you doing?

- I just want to go. - We're going to the beach.

- I don't want to-- I'm going to the beach.

I came prepared. - Oh, okay.

- Oh, okay. - All right, buddies?

- Sure. - Cool your jets.

- We just want to make sure. - Hey, Liz?

Dougie?

You ready? - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Bikes. Let's go.

- Okay.

Did you bring 'em? - Yeah, I got towels.

- Did you bring my SPF 100?

- Are we taking bikes? - Yeah.

The beach is just right up the way.

- Well, why don't we just-- let's just walk together.

- Can you help me?

- Okay, um, why don't we just walk?

- No! - Come on, it'll be nice.

- When do we ever get to be on bikes in the city?

Let's go.

- Practically never, but we can--

Um...

- Don't tell me you have something for work.

- I just need to send an email.

- No. You're not doing work.

Not on beach weekend. - It's just one email.

- You swore you weren't doing work.

- I can't--I don't have a choice here.

It's my job.

- You have five minutes.

- Okay. I will see you in five minutes.

It's just down that way and to the right?

- Yeah. I'm-- - Come on.

- I'm fucking pissed at you, Dougie.

- Get going.

- Five minutes. - You look good there.

Yeah!

Please hold my hand.

Go ahead.

- All right, baby, we'll see you back at the house in a few.

- All right, baby.

- All right. Bike safe.

- I like that suit.

- It's him in a nutshell.

How's cohabitatin'?

- Living together is amazing.

- Yeah? - It's amazing.

It's--it's great.

It's everything I want it to be.

It's...it's great. Um...

- But... - But--

It's not a "but." It's an "and."

He got into grad school.

- What? - I know.

- I thought that that was done deal.

- They didn't let him in and then on that letter,

they said check a box if you want to be considered

if someone drops out, and he did and he got in.

- So it's the same program?

- It's the same program. - Oh, my God!

- It's, like, it's the best program in the country.

- Yeah.

- It puts him in position to just, like,

get whatever he wants when he comes out.

It's--it's-- I mean, it's amazing.

- That's incredible.

- It's-- It is--

- But he has to leave.

- Yeah. But... we'll figure it out.

- You're putting on a brave face.

- No. No, no, no.

Really. It's--

You know, I'm nervous, but it's--

It's just amazing for him.

- Yeah.

I want to know about you. - What about you?

- Me? - No, no, no. Yeah, you.

- Ah.

I think I pissed Jackie off or...

she definitely pissed me off.

- What happened?

What'd she do? What'd you do?

- You're gonna think this is really stupid.

- Yeah?

- I brought a dildo.

- Okay.

A rainbow dildo.

- Nice.

Colorful.

- That she gave to me, like, years ago

and forgot about it 'cause it was a joke.

It was in a drawer, blah, blah, blah.

But we haven't had-- - You guys use those things?

- I mean, not that kind of thing.

We have a couple things.

We don't usually, though. - All right.

- But, uh, it's been a little dry recently.

- How dry?

- Like...

Sahara for the last couple months.

- Months? - Months, James.

Months.

So I threw it in my bag 'cause I thought

that maybe that would, uh,

bring some color back into the world.

- Yeah.

- But she freaked out.

She found it in my bag and she freaked out,

and she walked out of the room and...

I guess we're pretending that everything is okay,

but it doesn't feel like that.

There's a part of me that just, like,

wants to punch her in the face.

Do you ever feel that way? - Of course.

- Yeah?

I just, like, want to hold her down and--

Oh, yeah, absolutely.

I imagine ways that I'd fuckin' kill him.

But you know, in horrible ways.

But then I get over it a little and, you know.

- What's the longest you guys ever go without having sex?

- A few weeks?

I mean, you can have dry spells.

I mean, I've had 'em before and--

- Yeah.

- But I don't know.

Then at some point--

- You get a boner?

- You get a boner. and you know...

- Lesbians don't get boners. Maybe that's the problem.

- That's-- Yeah, you know, you got to work around that.

But there's got to be something else.

- I just got to talk to her.

It's stupid. I'm being a baby.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

- You just got to talk to her.

- I just got to talk to her.

- You just got to be honest.

You know, it's been too long to not be honest.

- Can you tell me to grow the fuck up?

- Just grow the fuck up. - Thank you.

You're welcome.

- Hey, get in here.

Get in here.

- Yeah, take that off.

Come on.

Look at you.

- Mmm!

- Shut up.

- Hi, baby.

- Hi.

- My grandmother used to do it like this.

- You in?

- Yeah, man.

- Is this your aunt?

- Um, I'll take two, please.

No.

I mean-- we're Greek.

We have-- it's a big family.

- Oh, yeah, the Stavros clan.

- Let me see?

- It's Christina's family?

- Oh. Maybe, yeah.

- Oh. - Hey.

- All right. - Sexy.

Shut up.

You know what? - You guys clean each other off?

- Just because we take a shower together

means we care about the environment.

We want to save water.

- Oh, very green.

- Oh, that's why. - Squeaky clean.

- That's green of you.

- If you hear noises in here, we're just saving some dolphins.

La-la-la-la-la-la-la...

- Come on, guys.

They're, like-- - Your sister.

- I like him. - I'm just telling you.

I like him too.

I would have liked to have seen that.

- I like him too, but can he

keep it in his pants for five minutes?

- Or could they keep it down? - This is the first day.

- He can barely keep it in his pants.

- We saw adapters in the shower.

You guys, I mean...

- You guys screwed in the shower too?

- Yeah. - Screwed?

Eww. But we fucked in the shower.

Yeah, absolutely.

- We made love in the shower. - Seriously?

- Yes, there's a sign out there

that says, "Please fuck in this shower."

- Oh, yeah, I'm sure Aunt Linda put that up just for us.

- I, uh, missed that.

- "Please. Love, Aunt Linda."

- Yeah, "Love Aunt Linda. Fuck in the shower."

- I don't fuck. I make love.

I fuck.

And on that note, we're gonna cook.

- In this shirt you make love?

- Uh, dinner team?

- Come on. - All right.

- I missed that sign.

- I know.

- You're too vulgar. - Animals.

- Hey, excuse me. - You're all animals.

- Okay. - Yeah.

Yeah, you might want to go quarters at this point.

- All right.

These are pretty small.

- Yeah, but it's good if they're really small, you know?

Not really small but, you know, you want 'em so it's--

You're not getting too much pepper with the dip.

You know what I mean? - Yeah, okay.

- You don't want to over-pepper it.

- Beers, anyone?

- Thank you so much. - There you are.

Oh, this is--I already sipped some of that.

All right.

- Yeah, cheers. both: Cheers.

- Cheers to you.

- What's on the menu?

- We're gonna get a little salad going.

We got some stuff inside.

We're gonna get the chicken on the grill.

- Peppers with the chicken.

- Yeah, and we got a little crudités going as well.

- Crudités. - Yeah, a little crudités.

Yeah, exactly. - What is that?

- What is crudités? - Yeah, I have no idea.

- I don't know what it means,

but what it is is, like, raw vegetables and dip and whatnot.

It's pretty much a fancy way of saying it.

It's a gay way of saying that

I'm gonna put out some vegetables with dip.

- Hey, Al told me you got in to grad school.

- Yeah. - Congrats.

- He did. Absolutely.

- I mean, I--yeah.

Yeah, I did, but I'm-- it's, like, very--

I'm not--I don't think I'm gonna go.

But yeah.

I got in, but I'm not--

- You did. Where'd you get in?

- Uh, University of Chicago.

But I really don't think I'm gonna--

- It's, like, the best program in the country.

He got in. It's education.

- Cool. - He wants to be a teacher.

He wants to be a chemistry teacher,

and he got into the best program in the country, so--

- That's amazing. - Yeah. I'm not probably--

- To grad school. - Okay.

There's a lot of things-- it's complicated.

It's like, you know, we just moved in together,

and, like, well, that's not--

But just, like, leaving the city and everything, just--

- Yeah. - It was like--

I don't think I'm gonna go or anything.

But, yeah, thank you.

- There are logistics. - Whatever you decide.

- But you know... - It's still great that you--

that you want to do it and that you got in.

- Yeah.

- Yeah, it's awesome is what it is.

- It is. Well, thank--thank you.

- You're-- I-- don't thank me.

- Do you want to bring this-- - The University of Chicago.

- Oh, yeah, yeah, bring those over--

- Yes, I will. - The crudités to them?

- Thank you guys for everything. - Thank you.

- Thanks for the beer, Doug. - Yeah, thank you, Doug.

You okay?

You're cutting the halves into half.

- They're pretty small, I guess.

Hey.

- Be here.

It's all good. - I'm here.

I love you.

Now, stop chopping those.

I have vegetables.

The boys chopped them up for us.

- Speaking of vegetables, I got to go find my beanstalk.

- Yeah. - Ooh.

- Yeah. Jackie bean. You two behave.

- Gonna climb her to the stars.

- Tell her to smile.

She's been so, like, blah all weekend.

- What are you guys talking about?

- Just, like, lots of-- I don't know.

Just relationship stuff.

This girl that she used to know.

- Girl she--

Well, I'm part of the relationship.

So I guess-- - Look at the sunset.

- That is nice.

- Isn't that amazing? - It is.

I love how the clouds are, like, dripping down almost.

- Oh, my God. You're so artistic right now.

- Isn't that-- it looks neat.

- Let's go--

Let's go watch the sunset on the bay.

- Okay. both: Yeah.

- Let's go grab the bikes. Are they just out front still?

- We can-- I mean, we can walk.

- Why would we walk to the bay when we could bike there?

We'll miss the sunset.

- Why would we bike there when we could walk there?

- 'Cause we will miss the sunset if we don't bike to the bay.

- No, we won't. We will make it.

We can't--I-- we're not--

- Why are you being super-weird about--

- Oh, I pulled some hair. Sorry.

Um, 'cause--

You should probably sit for this.

I don't want to-- Come on.

- I feel like you're gonna--

I feel like you're gonna tell me that you're dying.

I don't know what's happening right now.

- It's almost that bad.

I love you.

And...

I don't know how to ride a bike.

- What are you laughing about? I don't.

- Of course you know how to ride a bike.

You rode a bike to the beach earlier.

- Ooh, you think that I rode a bike to the beach earlier.

I walked a bike to the beach earlier today.

I mean, you wanted me to come,

and I was just gonna hang out here and--

- Are you-- you're being real right now.

I'm teaching you how to ride a bike.

I'm gonna teach you right now.

- Oh, God, that is not a good idea.

- Yeah, that's the best idea I've ever had in my whole life.

- Do you want to see me fall and crack my skull open?

- I mean, well, now-- kind of now that you said that.

- Oh, my God.

- No, I'm teaching you right now.

No, come on. We're going.

We're going. - Okay, fine; let's go.

- J?

- Mm.

Hi.

- Hey.

My breath is stinky.

- I don't care.

How you doing?

I'm okay.

Napped.

- Yeah. - Nap time.

- Mm-hmm.

- Mm-hmm.

What's up with you?

- Mm.

I feel a little lonely out there.

- Lonely? - Mm-hmm.

- You got peeps.

You got me.

- I know.

- Mm.

- I feel kind of...

I don't know.

- I feel weird.

- Weird? - Yeah.

- Why?

- I don't know.

I feel like...

I don't know.

There's--

I'm sorry that I brought that...toy.

- But it was--

My intention was for fun.

And...I kind of feel...

rejected.

Hey.

I know--I know I responded poorly to it,

and I know it was for fun.

I just-- It was really surprising

to see it there.

- Mm-hmm.

- And I felt like...

there's this black cloud of expectation on the weekend.

You know what I mean?

- Is sex a black cloud for you?

No.

I meant, like, inventive, exciting, I don't know.

- And you don't want that?

- I do.

I do.

But, um...

when it's mandated or expected,

that feels a little weird for me, you know?

But-- - Okay.

- I responded poorly. I know that.

And I'm sorry.

- No, that's okay.

I'm sorry I weirded you out.

I just, um, miss you.

I miss having sex with you.

It's been a really long time.

- It hasn't been that long.

- It's been a long time.

It makes me sad.

- Hey.

This is a problem with a solution.

It's you and me.

We're here. Right?

So let's hang out. You and me.

- Okay. - Okay?

Tonight. - Tonight.

- Tonight we'll just... - Hang out.

- See each other.

- Okay. - Okay?

- Sorry.

- No, don't be sorry.

Don't be sad. - I love you.

- I love you too.

Tonight. - Tonight.

- Okay. - Perk up.

And I'll try to perk up too.

- Yeah. Wake the fuck up.

- I'm working on it. - You wanna come outside?

- Let me get dressed. Then I'll meet you out there.

- Okay. You want coffee or something?

Okay.

- All right, so now you're gonna push with that one.

Now, when this comes around, put your foot on it.

When this comes around, put your foot on it.

- Okay, I am gonna...

- You're not gonna fall. - Fall into you.

- Okay, stop. - Liz, I'm--I--

I don't want to do this. - You're so close.

You just went from there to here.

You're basically doing it on your own.

- I don't want to do this. I'm going home.

- No, come on. We're just gonna go--

- Can you just-- I'm going back.

- Are you seriously leaving right now?

- I am.

- Dougie, come back here.

Are you kidding me?

- And you've all been there; there's, like, those nights,

full moon night, you know, like you're just, like,

feeling this intense desire to, like--

you want to hit something, but you don't know what to hit.

I was like lying in, like, the slime of, like, New York City.

I mean, it's like the worst my life's ever been.

Like I'm--I'm, like, drunk, depressed,

covered in toxic shit, and I could die at any second.

I walk down--there's little steps on the West 4th stop.

You'll see them on the north side.

They'll be down on the railroad tracks or the subway tracks.

So I went down. I was, like, 100 yards in.

- Into the actual subway. - Into the actual subway, yeah.

Thinking, like, if I get hit right now,

people will say it's suicide, but it's not.

It's just me being, like, angry and dumb.

You know? And drunk.

And then I--and I'm running.

All of a sudden, like, the train kind of goes down,

but I'm in the middle of the train track,

and I just, like, lose it,

and I slide headfirst through, like, the--

like, the slime and muck.

It's like toxic waste.

I had the smell in my nose for days after.

I'm not lying. - Oh, my God!

- I threw the clothes away when I got home.

both: Yeah. - And, um--So I got home.

That's the story. - That's good.

It's like I get to 14th Street, and I jump up,

and, um, and I get up.

There was this crowd of people waiting for the train.

I've had this, like, rebirth, like,

I'm like, "I'm alive" moment.

Like, like--and I look at them; they look at me,

and all I do is, like, scream this primal, like, "Ahh!

I'm alive!" Like, just like that.

And the whole place just-- - Picked up?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And they just, like, they part like the Red Sea.

Like, I just walk through and walk home.

I don't sleep the-- I didn't sleep the whole night, actually.

But that was like a moment where, like, I'm not--

"I'm not fucking a woman ever again."

I am--I am gay, and I'm gonna live my life

and I'm like, never touch a vagina, lick a vagina,

any kind of vagina anything--

- Cocks all the time. - Only cocks.

- I guess I always knew I was gay.

I didn't ever have to go down to the subway.

But cheers to you.

That's incredible.

- Well, I always knew, but I had to, like--

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - No more vagina ever more.

I don't need-- - Dicks from here on out.

- Dicks from there on. Dicks"R"Us.

- But licking vaginas is the best.

I'm sorry; you're missing something.

- I wholeheartedly disagree.

all: What?

- I mean, I agree, you are missing out on part of it,

but... - Mm-hmm.

- You never want to have to go down there, like, on your own.

- What? - You know?

- You serious?

- You don't like vaginas?

- No, I love vagi-- - Of course he loves vaginas.

- I very much enjoy a vagina.

I don't enjoy licking vaginas.

You know? - Wow.

- Tasting them, I guess. - Never?

- No, I've never liked it.

Like, you're down there,

and you can't really tell what's happening.

- Okay, that's enough talking about that.

Okay.

- Dougie can't ride a bike I learned today.

That was a thing I learned about him.

- Whoa! - That was a thing I told you...

- Isn't that crazy? - In confidence today.

- That is crazy. - Secrets.

- That's... - Well, we're breaking barriers.

- I don't think that that's that weird.

- So did anyone try to teach you how to ride a bike

when you were a kid? - Yeah, it's not like

nobody ever tried. I had training wheels,

and then when we took them off, my dad tried--

- I just remembered.

You were talking about University of Chicago, right?

I have this friend, Isaac, who went

and got his masters there in education.

Yeah, so if you want-- he's a really nice guy.

I'm sure if you sent him, like, an email--

- Oh, that'd be great. - Yeah.

I can give you his contact info. - Oh, yeah, sure.

- It's also last hurrah before hunker-down time.

- Yeah, before you stop working so much, right?

- I'm gonna be so bored. Oh, my God.

- 'Cause during winter, you get super-slow.

- Just drinking.

- Yeah, I'm not mad about that. - Baby?

- No, I'm good. Thank you, though.

- Yeah, he loves the city.

- Um... So yeah.

- Yeah, you've been doing so much this summer.

- He loves it there. And you have--

- I'm really--like, I really want to do it.

- Yeah. - I'm really excited about it.

- I'm sure he's gonna talk you into it.

Totally help you out with anything.

- Yeah, 'cause I feel like I don't know

anybody to talk to about it.

- Yeah, he-- - What's his name?

- Hey, baby-- - Isaac.

- Oh, hey. - You want another drink?

You want something else?

- I'm good. - Yeah? You sure?

All right.

- All right, what's his-- what was his--

- No, I'm--that's okay.

I didn't realize that you had told me that in confidence.

I thought that was something

that we were gonna work on this weekend.

So-- - Well, let's keep trying.

Let's make it work.

- When I teach you, it's gonna be at the crack of dawn.

I hope you're ready to get up very early.

- So I saw a game in there. - Yes.

all: Yeah. - That's good.

- Some whiskey.

- This game gets super-competitive, so...

- Y'all, I am going to win.

There is no doubt. - I don't know.

- Now? Inside?

- What are you doing, poker?

- We're really intense about games, so--

- Yeah, people, you are all going down.

- Let's go to the table.

- James, forget it.

- Thank you. - Sometimes.

- My love.

- I'll meet you in there. - Okay.

- Dougie, you bring any--

Dougie, do you have any pot on you?

- Uh, there might be some in my bag.

- Oh, yeah.

- Jackie, come on. - I'm coming.

Jesus.

- Hey, buddy.

- Hey.

- What are you doing?

- Shh, shh, shh. - Don't tell.

- Where did you get that?

- I found it in Aunt Linda's drawer.

- You found it in Aunt Linda's drawer?

What else was in there? - You want to share it with me?

- Yes, I do. - You don't want to know.

- Oh, God. - Just like high school.

Oh, my God.

- What's wrong with this weekend?

You tell me.

- I don't know.

That dinner was weird.

- Why, 'cause of Spencer?

- No.

A little.

- What's going on in here, huh?

- I don't know. - What color is it?

- I don't know. I'm not--

- You don't know?

You don't know?

I know.

- What color is it?

- Scream color.

You want to do it?

- Yeah. - You gonna scream with me?

Oh, yeah. - Fuck yeah.

Let's do it. - This is like--

Oh, this is a gated community.

I don't care.

Ready?

One, two.

Oh, my God.

- That feels better.

Guess I'm not having sex. I can scream.

- I'm sorry.

- I kind of talked to her about it.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

And I thought it was good,

but feels, like, sticky and prickly

and like everyone is in a... jar of cactuses.

- I love you.

- Click!

This is what Jackie feels like right now.

- Yeah.

- "I love you." Click-click!

It was fine, but then during dinner,

she was all, like, "No, thanks."

- I know. Two glasses of wine and done.

- Makes me feel old or something.

- Yeah. - Scary.

I have an idea.

- What's that?

- We're gonna go inside...

- Yeah.

- And we're gonna be in the moment.

- We're gonna be present.

- We're gonna be present.

- And that's gonna make them be present.

- Yeah.

Stop worrying about everything.

Everyone's so worried about everything.

I'm worried about everything, and I don't--

- When did that happen? - I don't know.

- We didn't worry about shit this much.

- I don't remember worrying about shit this much.

- You guys are gonna be fine.

- I know.

- It's just a rut.

- You guys are gonna be fine too.

No matter what happens.

I can see it between you.

- Yeah? - You know?

There's the vibe.

- Good.

- Do you feel it?

Here?

- Yeah.

It's gonna be all right, right?

- Yeah.

Let's have some fun.

- Let's have some fun.

Forget about... all that.

- Forget about it.

- You're my best friend.

- You're mine.

- I love ya.

- I love you.

- Okay.

- Let's do it. - Let's go do it.

- Dougie. - Blank.

Bet you can't have just one.

Shaquille O'Neal's acting career.

Bet you can't have just one.

The clitoris.

Bet you can't have just one.

- Ooh.

- Battlefield amputations.

Bet you can't have just one.

- Ooh. That is dark.

- Tom Cruise. Bet you can't have just one.

And altar boys. Bet you can't have just one.

Man. - That went down a dark--

- Yeah.

- Altar boys or battlefield amputations.

- Battlefield amputations.

- I think it's battlefield amputations.

Oh, my God.

You've gotten all of the ones that I've--

- You won every round.

Bet she can't have just one.

- I'm really proud of myself.

- You and I are, like, right on this.

- Wait. That's the one you won.

You got to pick one from the pile.

That's already happened.

- Oh.

- Ladies and gentlemen...

Cheers to that.

- I am drunk.

"'That's right. I killed blank.'

"'How?' You ask. Blank."

- Wow, it's a two-carder.

- Two cards. Two cards.

- "That's right. I killed blank."

"How?" You ask. "Blank."

- We have--you have to keep our cards separate, right?

- Oh, God, I got such a good fuckin' one for this.

- Okay, so-- - Wait.

So how do we give it to you

so you read it in the order that we think?

- I would do the one you want first on top, right?

- The first one-- No, on the bottom.

'Cause you pick it up. - No, 'cause she's gonna--

Oh, you're right. You're absolutely right.

- Yeah, bottom first. - This is too little.

- I got it, baby. - That's right.

I killed a salty surprise.

"How?" You ask.

The taint, the grundle, the fleshy fun bridge.

Wow.

I killed the milkman today.

"How?" You ask. - Hilarious.

- Killed my collection of high-tech sex toys.

- No.

- Puberty.

- With puberty?

- She's reading them all backwards.

- That was a good one.

- I killed finger painting--

- You're reading them all backwards.

- Okay, well, then fuck this.

You win.

- Wait. - Whoa, no.

- You have a different point.

- I killed authentic Mexican cuisine with finger painting.

- I killed Michael Jackson with Robert Downey Jr.

- What? - Wow.

- That totally makes sense.

- Very literal. - All right.

Who wants another?

- Gimme. - Let's top it off.

- Gimme, gimme. - Gimme, gimme one more time.

- Gimme more. Gimme.

- Gimme, gimme. Isn't that another Britney song?

- Yeah. - Gimmies!

- I thought pointy nipples. - Yeah?

- Or was that Bruce?

- Bruce who? Willis?

Bruce Wayne? - Wait.

When did the pointy nipples come up?

What are you talking about?

- What are you talking about?

Straight out the bottle.

- Holy shit. Have we had that much of it?

- Where you going, baby?

- Getting ready for bed.

both: Bed? - What?

- Bed head. - What time is it?

- Yeah, bed head.

- Where I come from, bed doesn't even start until--

- My girlfriend wants to go to bed.

- Yeah, hit me. Hit me, baby.

- One more time?

- Yeah. - Ooh, Britney.

- You dress-- - James and I used to both...

dress like Britney Spears. - Oh.

- And-- - The fucky-fucky again.

- And sing her songs.

- Hey, where did, uh-- Where'd Jackie go?

- I don't know.

- Yeah, let's just do it. Let's--

- Cheers. - Down the hatch.

Oh.

- Mm.

Okeydokey.

- "Okeydokey" what?

- I think that was it for me.

- Oh, my God. You're going to sleep?

- I love you guys.

- Giggles, come back. - I love you.

- And we love you. - Giggle--hey.

Don't go to sleep.

- You're my favorite.

- What?

- Think bad things are gonna start happening now.

- What are you talking about?

- I don't know.

- What? - See you tomorrow.

- What is she talking about?

- She never used to go to s-- bed early.

That's a new thing.

- Yeah?

Why did everybody go to sleep?

Come here. Hold on.

- Mm.

- We're not going to sleep.

We're on a frickin' fun island.

- Want to go skinny-dipping?

Ooh.

Hi.

- Hi.

- What were you doing in there?

- I'm-- my routine.

- It takes forever.

- Yeah.

Bedtime?

- Mm-hmm.

I just got so tired.

- Okay.

- I love you.

- I love you.

- I'm gonna miss you over there.

All the way on my island.

- Mm-hmm.

It'll be lonely.

- All right. Sleep well.

- Okay.

- That was fun.

Ooh!

*

- Good morning

Good morning

One little teeny cup of joe for you.

- Yes. Thank you. Thank you for this.

- Mm-hmm.

- These are the daintiest little cups.

- Of course it is.

- Thank you.

- Of course.

Let's go for a walk. It's beautiful out.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

- Okay.

- Let's go. Let's go. Come on.

- All right. All right.

Watch the nipples.

- I feel like over here's gonna be a good spot.

- Lot of houses right here, Liz.

- It's the end of September. There's nobody here.

- What do you mean there's nobody--

- There's nobody in any of these houses.

- We're here. - Come on.

Nobody's gonna see you. Stop being such a worrywart.

The thing that you weren't getting

was getting your second foot on.

- Yeah.

- So what we're gonna focus on today

is picking a-- like, a point of focus.

- Okay. - Uh...

and headed straight for it,

but you want to put your second foot on.

You're gonna get this. It's gonna be great.

- I hope so. - Ready?

Follow me.

I can be your point of focus if you want.

- Okay, yeah. I like that.

- All right, come to me then.

It's like--

- Come on. You're stalling.

Let's go. - All right.

- All right, push. Get your second foot on.

Go, go, go.

Get your second foot. Just put it on.

Put this foot on the pedal. - I'm trying to get my--

- Okay. Whoa. All right.

- It's harder than that--

- I know. I know. I know.

It's--it's-- riding a bike is hard.

- Don't make fun of me.

- I'm not. Honey, you are so close.

I'm extremely proud of you.

You've gotten really far.

- I really don't want to do this.

Can we please just go back?

- Well, that's too bad,

because you are so close you're gonna do it anyway.

Give me a kiss.

- You can be very patronizing.

You know that?

- Well, I'm not trying to be.

I'm just trying to get you to ride a bike.

All right, let's go.

Back to start.

- Morning.

Or should I say "afternoon."

What time is it?

- Uh, I think it's like noon-30.

- Really?

- You're missing valuable beach time.

- Sorry.

- Can you get my back, please?

- Yeah. - Thanks.

- I think I drank a little too much,

but that's what vacation is for, right?

Sure.

I guess some vacations.

- Mm.

I'm sorry I fell asleep.

- It's okay.

Am I done?

- Mm-hmm.

- Okay.

Put your suit on.

- Okay. - Meet you out there?

- Righty-o.

- Okay.

- You want this?

- Sure. Thank you.

- So you were talking to Jackie last night about it--

- Yeah, yeah, she has this friend Isaac

who, like, went to the exact same program.

- Oh, yeah? - Yeah, yeah.

She connected us all on email.

- Wow. - And she emailed me last night.

And then this morning,

we had a five-minute conversation already.

- Wow. And he's a nice guy?

- Oh, yeah, yeah.

He's, uh...he's living in-- living in Chicago.

He's a math teacher-- high school math teacher.

- So he stayed there?

- Yeah, you don't have to stay there, but, like, yeah, he--

They help you with placement and everything, so--

- That's great. - Yeah.

- That's really great.

- You okay?

- Yeah.

I'm just tired.

I didn't sleep very well.

Ugh.

- Mom, stop calling.

- What'd she want?

- Uh, she wants to talk about finances and stuff if--

If I end up, uh...

If I end up going, she wants to--

talk about helping me out a bit.

- That's nice. - Yeah.

If I'm going, which I'm, you know--

Who knows?

- All right, you see how that foot is on?

- Yeah, I see.

- I'm just gonna set the other one on quickly.

- Great.

- And it's gonna, like, help me balance

just by getting that second foot on.

- That's all it takes is the balance, huh?

- Look, I know that you're competitive,

but I'm not trying to best you. - It's not about competition.

- I'm not trying to show you up right now.

- I'm just trying to--

It's not helpful to see somebody ride a bike.

- Well, if it's not helpful, then you show me.

- You want to see how this is done?

Watch a master at work.

Okay, here you go. - Yeah, fine, go.

- I just got to get my second foot, right?

- Yeah.

- I got it. - Holy shit.

Yeah, just like that.

- That was amazing! Yes!

- I almost went right off the edge there, though.

- Yeah, you, like, put both of them on

and then you take them off.

- It doesn't feel that close, but--

- Come on, back, back, back. That was--Oh, my God.

That was so close. That was so close.

- Chicago's a cool city. - Yes.

It is.

It's a great city.

- Yeah. - It's a great city.

So is New York.

- It is. - Yeah.

- It is.

Jesus.

- I know.

- She really wants to talk.

- Yeah.

You okay?

- Yeah.

Just tired.

- You seem kind of closed off.

- That's funny.

'Cause I feel like...

I feel like when we were talking to Dougie

last night about grad school, you were...

totally disingenuous to him.

- What do you mean?

- I mean, you had your foot in your mouth

the whole conversation.

I mean, he asked you about it, and you couldn't even say

like you were excited that you got in.

- I'm excited about getting in, yeah.

I just told him I don't know what I'm--what I want to do.

It's like, the guy should assume--

- I mean, he didn't ask for your plans.

I think he just wanted to know how you felt about it.

- I just told Doug that I don't know what I'm gonna do.

That's the truthful thing.

I don't know what I'm gonna do.

- But you want to go.

- I don't know if I want to go or not.

I'm excited that I got in.

That's what I-- that's all I know.

- I don't know. - What?

- I just feel like you were, like,

not saying something on purpose, and like you were,

like, trying to protect me and not say something...

- Protect you?

- In front of me or something

or to--or actually say how excited you are.

- Can you look me in the eyes? I feel like you're--

What--what--what do you want me to say?

I don't know what I-- what I want to do.

That's the truth. - This morning, today, you--

See, you're actually fucking excited about it,

and that's all I want.

I just want you to be excited

or just be whatever you're feeling and not--

- Like, I'm obviously excited I got in,

but I don't know what I'm gonna do with it.

- So say you're excited about that.

Just say-- - Okay, I'm excited about going.

I'm excited about maybe going.

- See, that's it right there, that "maybe."

Just say you want to go. - I don't know if I want to go.

- Just say that you want to go.

- Why? I don't know if I want to--

- Just say it.

'Cause you do. - I don't know if I want to go.

- Spencer, don't-- Just say that you want to go.

Just say it.

Just be fucking honest with yourself.

- Okay, I want to go. I want to go.

- Finally.

- Baby, I'ma get this, and then--Two seconds.

And then we can talk about it. - Yeah, two seconds.

- No, I-- - All right.

Tell her I say hi.

Yeah, Mom?

- Yeah, I'm on-- I'm on an island right now,

so, like, what--

- I know you've been trying to call me, Mom.

I know that, because my phone's been vibrating

every five minutes.

- All right, fast. - We're turning right around.

- I just want to beat you at something.

- You always beat me at everything.

- Okay, we're gonna race when I'm done with this,

and I'm gonna kick your ass.

- Why do you think that's half the battle?

The reason I'm, like, trying to teach you right now,

'cause it'll give us a new thing to fight over.

Right, let's go. - All right.

You're not as bad a teacher as I thought, I guess.

- Thank you. - Okay.

- Go, go, go, go, go. - Yep, I got 'em on.

- Great, great, great. - Yeah, baby!

- Yeah, perfect. - Oh!

- Holy shit. Dougie?

- Spencer?

Spencer?

Damn it.

- You having a good time?

- Yeah.

- I'm not convinced by that answer.

- I'm having a good time.

You know, I'm trying to... relax on cue, which is hard.

But I'm getting there.

- Okay.

- Hey. - Hey.

- Hi.

What's up?

I lost Spencer in the fucking woods.

- What?

- It's fine. - You lost him?

- Just got to get my phone.

- You need help? - Do you need help?

- No, it's fine. Relax.

Jeez.

Doesn't sound good.

So dramatic.

- Do you not like my friends?

- I love your friends.

That was just a--

I love your friends.

- Okay.

How come you walked out on game night?

- I didn't--

I wasn't intentionally walking out on game night.

I just wanted to... spend some time with you.

I thought we had a plan to hang out,

so I wanted to--

- So you left in the middle of the game.

- It seemed like a good time.

I don't know.

- Jackie, we were playing a game

and everyone was having a good time,

and you just got up and left in the middle,

and I thought you were mad at me.

- I was having a good time too.

I wasn't mad at you.

I gave you the sexy eyes, the cue.

- I thought those were angry eyes.

- Well, that's a blow to the ego.

Um...

- I mean, I wanted to have sex this morning,

but you seemed really not into that.

- You tried to have sex with me this morning?

- Yeah.

- You mean at noon when you woke up?

- Okay, fine. At noon when I woke up.

- When? Why didn't you say anything?

- Why didn't you say anything last night?

- Because we had a plan.

- Yeah, but there wasn't a specific time.

It wasn't like, "All right, at 10:30, we're gonna--

"no matter what's happening,

we're gonna get up and walk into the room and"--

- But when else was it gonna happen?

- Any time. Right now.

Why not?

I just feel like something is going on here,

and we need to be able to connect.

And it's not about the beach

and it's not about all this other stuff,

and it's about you and me

and we just have to figure that out somehow.

- You keep presenting me with all these problems

that I can't possibly solve alone, and...

you got to meet me somewhere.

- I'm trying.

I just-- what do you want me to do?

- I don't know. We're fucking--

We're off every step of the way.

It's like, "Oh, I didn't react right to every"--

The fuckin' dildo in your bag.

I'm the killjoy. I don't want to have any fun.

I'm not doing it right or at the right time or--

It's just problem after problem, and I'm trying to fix it.

I'm trying to find a solution, but--

- I don't know, Jackie.

It just feels like you're on this path

and you've got it all laid out in front of you,

but you won't let me in on that,

so I don't know how to follow you.

I don't know how to be there with you.

It's not-- it's not where I am.

- You need to help me find a solution.

- Okay, so what would you like me to do?

I don't know.

I don't know.

- We're stuck.

- Mm-hmm.

Well, I don't-- I don't really know what to say.

And I feel like anything I do say

is not gonna be productive, so--

I just need a moment.

- Hey, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I got--I got your message. Okay.

Where are you?

At the fence.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hey, I got to go. I'll see you there.

All right. Bye.

- Okay? - Mm-hmm.

- Sit down on the couch. - Hey--whoa.

- I can-- I can do that.

- Hey...

- Hi. - Hey, hi.

Um...

Fuck. Sorry. We had a little accident.

- Yeah, is-- are you-- hey, are you okay?

- Yeah, I'm fine.

It's-- it's-- yeah.

I'm gonna get an ice pack.

- No, sit--sit down.

I can get you an ice pack. God.

- Thank you.

- Can I get you-- What--what happened?

- Oh, it's just-- I fell off a bike.

- You fell off your bike. - Yeah.

- I'm sorry, bud. You okay?

Relax, man.

- Oh, fuck me.

- No, no, no. It's not bad.

Don't look at it.

Yeah. - It's fine.

- Yeah. - Here we go.

- You got to get some ice on there.

- Ice. Yeah, right there. Oh, that feels good.

- Okay. Great, great, great.

- You need anything? - No, no.

- He's big. He's tough. He's strong.

- Yeah, yeah. - He's great.

- All right, I'm gonna go get Spencer.

He's locked out, and-- - Yeah, no problem.

Yeah, we're totally set here. Thanks, James.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Thanks.

- God... All right, babe.

- Oh, God. I need to find aspirin.

I want to get some-- - I can find you aspirin.

- I can get some aspirin, Liz.

I don't need your help to do everything.

Can I-- - Where is it?

- It should be in this front--

Liz, I don't need you to look for me.

- Well--

- Shit.

- Can you just let me help you?

- Fuck!

I didn't bring any.

Do you have some in your purse or your suitcase?

- No, I don't.

I am gonna go find some for you.

- What, you don't have any?

- No. Can you just stay here?

- Yes. - I'll be back. Five minutes.

- Can I come? - No.

Can you just sit here, and I will go find you aspirin.

- Hi. - Oh, hi.

- How are you? - Okay.

- Hi, I'm Liz.

- Um, Angela. Nice to--

- Angela. Beautiful day.

- Yeah, it is. - Right?

Uh, do you happen to have any painkillers?

- Painkillers.

Um...uh, sure. I must.

Everything okay?

- Oh, yeah, just headaches.

- Oh. - I--he--

My boyfriend. Headache.

- Sure. Come on in. - Thank you.

Ow.

- Dougie?

This fuckin' weekend.

- I'm so sorry to bother you.

It's just really-- - Oh, no bother at all.

Just let me see.

In here.

Hmm. - Your house is awesome.

- Oh, thanks.

Just I'm not sure where it would be.

Let's see.

Oh, maybe in here?

Oh, whoa. Oop. Jeez.

Whoa.

Oh.

- Are you okay?

Um, yeah.

It's just, um... My dog is, uh...

around somewhere.

I just-- I'm not sure where.

- Oh. - Uh, ibuprofen, not aspirin.

Uh, yes.

Yes.

Thank you. - Great. Great.

- Do you want help-- Is your dog lost?

Do you want help finding him?

- Oh, no, I'm sure he's around. He'll show up.

- Okay, I'll keep an eye out.

- Thanks.

- Thank you. I'll bring them back.

- Sure. - Great.

- Thank you.

- Hey.

- Hey.

How's your weekend going?

- Fantastic. And yours?

- Great.

Dougie?

Wanna take a ferry? I'll get it.

- Yeah. - Here.

Okay, okay. - Okay, 4:30.

- 4:30? - Yeah, what time is it?

That's the last one.

- Here. - Fuck.

It's--it's 4:27.

- Oh, shit. We got to hurry.

- There's no way we can make it in three minutes.

- Yeah, there is. We can make that.

- Are you kidding?

We can't make the ferry in three minutes.

Can you just lie back down for me?

Oh, my God, look at your toes.

Dougie. - I know.

- No, no, no. We are not making it.

We are not going anywhere.

You're lying back down right now.

- Okay, fine. - Look. Here.

I got some of this for you.

- I need-- - Where are you going?

- I need water. - I can get you wa--

Let me take care of you.

- Okay. I just--

- Hey, look at me.

I'm here to help you. Let me be here with you.

- Okay. I'm sorry.

- I'll be right back.

- Okay.

- Okay.

- Thank you. - Yeah.

- Hey.

- What took you so long?

Dougie fuckin' broke his arm or something.

I don't know. - Dougie broke his arm?

- Yeah, he fell off his bike.

- There's a moron. - He's a fucking idiot.

- It's a crazy-- Doug breaks his arm.

I'm behind, like, the western, like, Berlin Wall.

It's so fuckin'-- yeah.

This is the stupidest-- Okay.

- Can you get it--

Can you get over or something?

Or if you stand-- - No. What?

- I don't know. - You bring the key?

- Bring a key? No, I didn't bring a key.

You didn't tell me to bring a key.

I didn't know there was a key.

- What did you think I was doing here?

Does it look like I wanted to have a chat?

- Relax, okay? Let me--let me call Jackie.

- Yeah, please come down to the fence.

- All right, relax. I get it, okay?

- This is Jackie Stavros.

- Voicemail. - Of course.

Does nobody answer their phones on this island?

It's like a policy like, let's just, like--

- Well, most people leave their phones in their room

when they go on a beach weekend.

- Oh, okay.

Sarc--I got that. Thank you.

- You're welcome. - Sarcasm, yeah.

It was a two-minute conversation.

That's what it was. A two-minute conversation.

That's all it was.

- Why'd you take the call, though?

- 'Cause... Ugh.

It was a two-minute call.

- It's not about how long it was.

- Yes, it is.

It was, like, a two-minute call

that you freaked out on and you left.

- We were in the middle of something.

- Yeah, well, we could continue right afterward,

but you, like, abandoned me.

- I was fuckin' pissed at you.

- You were pissed at me?

- Yeah.

You finally were fucking honest with me,

and you decided to take the call from your fuckin' mom.

- Okay, all right. Forget the mom, okay?

Maybe I should have not-- Okay, whatever, but--

- No, you shouldn't have taken the fuckin' call

from your mom right when you fuckin'--

- Can we drop the call thing? Can we drop the call thing?

I wish I could tell you--

Like, I wish I could share this with you.

I really--

- So share it with me. That's--

- No, I really can't, though. I really can't.

I want to tell you how I feel,

but then as soon as I do, I feel like you freak out.

- You're not giving me a fuckin' chance.

You'll talk to anyone but me.

You'll talk to Jackie. You'll talk to Jackie's friend.

You'll talk to your fuckin' mom.

You probably talk to the fuckin' bum on our street.

But you won't fuckin' talk to me.

- James, I want to talk to you.

- So do it!

Just tell me how you fucking feel!

- I'm scared to.

I'm scared to 'cause I don't know how you'll react.

- I'm me. You know fuckin' me.

It's not a fuckin' surprise.

All I want to know is what

you're actually feeling about it.

- Do you? - Yeah.

'Cause I'm so fuckin' happy for you

and I'm so goddamn proud of you.

You understand that?

- Are you really? - Yeah, I am.

- You are excited, but you're also terrified.

And that part you don't talk about ever.

And so I'm here, stuck with, like--

with, like, all this, like, these things in my head,

and I don't know who to talk to.

So I talk to my mom, the bum on the--

I never talk to the bum on the streets ever,

but, like, I would-- I mean, I would.

Okay, I don't know what we're talking about.

Why-- This is-- I want to touch you right--

Fences!

It's like Romeo and fuckin' Juliet right now.

That's-- like, you're on the other side of the fence.

This is-- Oh, I don't know.

I can't-- I don't even know. I don't even know.

- That was a balcony.

- Okay, it--Okay.

I'm gonna do it.

I'm gonna go.

That's two years of our lives

that we're not gonna be together, and I--

And how could you really be excited about that?

You know, how-- and that's why I don't--

That's why I can't tell you these things and--

- But you're not giving me any credit.

- That's true; I'm not.

- Of course I'm excited for you

and I'm happy for you.

But, yeah, you're gonna be gone,

and I'm gonna be fuckin' left alone.

You get that? I'm just doing me.

I'm doing the same thing. I'm not changing shit up.

You're gonna fuckin' leave.

Don't you get that?

You're gonna fuckin' leave, and I'm gonna be left here.

Can't you fuckin' understand that?

And I'm not trying to make you feel guilty.

I'm not trying to make you feel bad

for getting in or for being happy,

but can't you just put yourself

in my fuckin' shoes for a minute?

Fuck.

- Hey.

I can't do this shit.

Just--

Do you know how to get back to where I left you?

- Come back here. - Huh?

- Come here.

- Just--do you know how to get back?

Yes or no? - Yeah, yeah, I do.

- All right, I'll meet you there.

- I can't believe you busted up your feet like that.

That's just crazy. - I know.

They hurt like a motherfucker.

Is your sister still out there?

- No.

- Okay.

- Why?

- 'Cause she came in earlier, and I kind of ducked her.

- Why would it matter if you saw her right now?

Why don't you want them to know?

- I know it doesn't make sense.

It's not like they're not gonna find out.

But...

I don't know. I don't--

I don't want to be made fun of.

- Who would make fun of you for hurting yourself?

- I-- I don't know.

I get worried that you will think less of me...

If I'm not...

I don't--I-- I strive for this...

feeling that I can help you.

- You're not wanting this to be a partnership.

I mean, in a relationship, it's 50/50, buddy.

It's you and me, and we're gonna help each other.

So if you're gonna-- if I'm gonna let you help me,

then you have to let me help you.

- I know. I know.

And...

I want your help.

I just don't want to admit it.

- I think one of the sexiest strengths

is recognizing when you're scared.

- Yeah?

- And I think you're doing that right now.

And I think that's really attractive.

- Yeah? You getting off on me right now?

Mm.

- Thank you for sharing.

- Thank you for helping.

- God, I didn't fuckin' help. I did this to you.

- Oh, it's fine.

- I was just, like, so pushy and so...

aggressive.

And you know that I get so competitive and...

And I--I broke your wrist.

I broke your wrist.

- You didn't break my wrist.

That fuckin' sidewalk did.

- I know, but I kept mak--

but I kept making--

- Come here.

- Baby, I'm really sorry.

- You don't have to be.

Come here.

- I'm really sorry.

- Hey.

What I love the most about you

is that you always want to push me.

- That you want the competition.

It makes me better.

You make me try new things.

And I can never fault you for that.

- Hey.

Hey, little man.

What's going on?

Where's your owner?

Huh?

Want to go on an adventure?

Come on.

Let's go.

Al?

- What are--

Wait, wait, wait.

Stay where you are, otherwise this is really gonna hurt.

- What are you doing right now?

You're-- you're falling apart.

What are you doing?

- I...

am doing something I've never done for you.

- Is this just because of last night?

- Oh, no.

This is because of today...

and last night.

- This is insane. - Hey.

I'm gonna need you to tell me if I'm doing this right.

Okay?

- Can you help me through it?

These are not gonna work.

- Uh...

Is this anything like it's supposed to feel?

- That's exactly how it's supposed to feel.

- Okay.

Hey, Alley cat?

- Jackie?

- Um...

- Jackie?

Um...

- Wha-- - I--

- I--I got to go. - Hey, Jackie.

- I'm sorry, I gotta go. - Don't walk away...

from me, please.

Fuck!

- Where'd you get a dog?

- I don't know. He was wandering around.

So I thought I'd grab him before some--

I don't know.

- He's cute.

- Come on.

It's back this way.

- Hey. - Hey.

I need you to know that...

I understand you might be pretty angry at me right now.

And I understand that.

- I'm not angry.

- What are you feeling?

I'm sad.

And...

Feel...guilty.

- Why?

- And I feel...

We really have a problem.

It just...

became apparent to me.

- I don't think we have a problem.

- You know what keeps popping in my head

is that article that Janine wrote.

And how-- - That's not us.

- I don't know. I thought it was such BS.

And now...

I don't know.

Are we bed-dead?

- Mm-mm.

I want you all the time.

- I want you.

I want you always.

- And forever.

- And forever.

- Hey, come here.

- Hi.

- You are the most...

beautiful person I have ever met.

And I promise that I will look at you every day.

- I love you... - I love you.

- With every fiber of my being.

- Mm-hmm.

- We just got to... get over this hump.

- Yeah.

- That's all it is is a hump.

- Uh-huh.

I need to say things out loud. - Yeah.

We need to be intentional with each other and obvious.

And maybe it's gonna take some of the mystery away,

but I think we got to do it.

- Better than being in the dark.

I know.

- Asleep and alone in the dark.

Yes.

You're right.

- Hey.

Get it.

Make a wish.

I got a couple.

All right. Let's make a deal.

- Okay.

- From now on, we're gonna be intentional.

And honest with each other.

- And obvious.

- And obvious and blatant.

Even if it sounds stupid.

- It's gonna sound really stupid.

But we'll get through it.

I think we can make it-- we can make it sexy.

We'll make it, like, a role-playing thing.

- Well, once we're doing it, it doesn't matter.

- That's true.

- Just the getting there might be a little--

- I know. Bumpy.

I'm in a mosquito cloud.

- You're in a beauty cloud.

- Come here.

I want to smash my face into your face.

- I want to dig my teeth into your guts and rip 'em out.

- But I need them.

- I'll put 'em back. - Okay, good.

- After I'm done chewin' 'em.

- Okay. - Okay.

- So we have a deal?

- We have a deal.

- Maybe--yeah.

- And-- - And--

- Jackie. - What?

- I really want to have sex in that boat.

- That--that boat?

Yeah.

- I don't know whose boat that is.

- I don't care.

- You want to break onto a boat?

and fuck on a boat?

I do.

- I at least want to try it.

- Okay.

- Okay. - Yeah.

You are turning me into a scalawag.

Okay.

- All right, let's go.

- Fuck it. - Fuck it.

- What do you think his name is?

- Jack. - Jack?

- Mm-hmm.

- You love the name Jack.

- Jack.

Do you fetch, Jack? - What's that?

- Look at this. - You gonna get it?

- Look what I found.

Yeah? - Go on.

Go get it.

- I love you.

I love you too...

Like, a lot.

Don't milk my thumb.

- Mm. - Stop it.

I hate that.

- I'm really sorry.

- I was just gonna say that.

Have you ever taken the Amtrak?

It's a nice train

to Chicago on the Amtrak.

- Yeah, I might take a flight over a train.

- Oh, yeah?

- Yeah. - Huh.

Less romantic.

But a lot quicker.

- Is this my shirt?

- Maybe.

- This is definitely my shirt.

- You have better T-shirts than me.

- I've been looking for this shirt.

- I'll be keeping it.

Come here.

- Ow!

Okay.

Hold on. Let me stash that. - Uh.

How does--

- Fuck. - Fuck.

- Ow. - You okay?

- Yeah, I'm good.

- What the fuck?

- Oh, my goodness. There he is.

Oh, you found him!

Oh, thank you.

Where have you been? Oh, you had me worried all day.

You know, this time of year no one's around.

I didn't think I would see him till--

I don't know-- tomorrow morning.

I was just so scared.

- I found him over by the beach.

- Oh, oh. - He's sweet.

- Oh, I do appreciate it. - Yeah.

- I wouldn't have known what to do.

Yeah.

- He's a cutie. - Really, thank you.

- That's amazing. - Oh, hi.

Yes, yes, your friends here found him, actually.

- Yeah. - You guys found her dog?

- Yeah. - They did. They did.

- Nice.

- Again, thank you. - Oh, I brought these for you.

Thank you so much for letting me borrow them.

That was so nice of you.

- Great. Everything okay?

Yeah, headache all gone. - Good, good, good.

You're staying with-- at the Gregorys'.

You're friends of...

or family?

- Yeah.

- Friend--fam-- Family friends.

- Family friends. - Family friends of them.

both: Yeah. - Oh, good.

- The Gregorys, yeah. - Way back.

Okay, good.

- Well, again, thank you.

- Of course. You have a good night now.

- Have a good night. - Thank you.

- Bye-bye. Come on.

- Jackie's last name is not Gregory.

- Yeah, let's just go.

Come on, let's go in. - Come on, come on, come on.

- Let's go. - Later.

- We got to warn them.

Let's go find Jackie.

- All right, you get them. - Now. Al?

Hey, Jackie?

Okay, uh... - Fuck.

Our bags and then cleaning the house.

Jackie?

Girls, are you in here?

Guys?

- Um...

we're busy.

- Okay, now's not the time for that.

Well, sorry to interrupt, but, Jackie,

this is not your Aunt Linda's house.

- Wait. What?

- Come--can you come out here, please?

- What?

- This is a family named the Gregorys' home,

and now we are trespassing.

So we have to get out of here right now, okay?

The boys have already started packing.

We have to leave, 'cause we're breaking in.

- Yeah, let's go.

Fuck!

- Yeah, I got the dishes.

- I don't know.

I don't think we should keep this.

- Putting dishes over here, if that's--

- All right, that's great, Doug.

- Oh! - Oh!

- Sorry, Gregorys!

- Good old Gregory.

- Got it? - I got it.

- Don't let it slam.

- Do you guys know where we're walking?

- Sorry, baby.

- Jackie, you fucked it up.

- Thank you. - Well done.

Well done. Let's drink to that.

- There's gonna be police waiting for us,

like, outside of the ferry.

- I wonder who the Gregorys are.

I feel like I know them so well.

- Anybody strip their sheets?

- Oh. - Boo.

- 'Cause we definitely made 'em dirty.

- Yeah, ours is--

- All right.

- Um, to...fucking it up.

- Yeah, hey, but recovering gracefully.

Huh?

- You're sentimental. - Oh, my God, guys.

I love you better for it.

all: Cheers.

- This is big.

- I have to prepare myself.

- Mmm. - Mmm.

- God, you guys all did that in one?

- Oh, yeah.

Hi. - Hi.

- Um, so...

So...

- Just...

wanted to say that...

uh...

I, uh, want to know...

Communication, communication. - My little weirdo.

Do you want to have sex?

- Um...

- What are-- what are you thinking?

What are you--

- I think that I am so tired.

- Happy, but so tired.

- Yes, me too.

- And I just kind of want to go to sleep.

- Yeah. We had a long day.

- We broke into a house. - Yeah, we did.

- Then we broke into a second one.

- All right. - Okay.

So-- - Thank you for asking, though.

That was lovely. - Sure thing.

I'll do it every night.

Okay.

It'll be a part of our ritual.

- Okay.

- I love you. - I love you.

- I'm gonna put my strip-- - Okay, do it.

- And my guard.

Stop it.

- You're kind of like a football player.

You're such a bitch.

- Like a sleep football player.

- We should get you some eye black too.

- Okay. Surprise me in the morning.

Okay.

- Good night. - Okay, I love you.

I love you.

- Prevent further intruders.

- You got the smiles this morning.

- Yeah.

I think I figured something out.

- Oh, yeah? - Yeah, maybe.

- Yeah, you want to write a book about it?

- Yeah, I do. - Yeah?

- I'm gonna write a whole book of poems about it.

- Oh, yeah? - Mm-hmm.

- Just a whole book of lezzie poems.

Do you want to be a contributor?

- Oh, yeah, I think I got some real good stuff for you.

- Got some good ones this weekend?

- Uh-huh. - Nice.

- Yeah. Real emotional.

- Do you need to scream?

- I don't think so.

- Okay.

- Do you?

- Mm-mm.

- I think we're good.

- All right, that's it.

See you, Gregorys.

It's been real.

Let's do it, baby.

Oh, hey!

Oh, look at you. - Look at this.

- Doug, you're really milking it.

- Oh, yeah.

- You're really milking it for everything it's worth.

Yeah. - Don't worry.

Jeeves will get a great tip when we're done.

- Yeah. - Shit.

Move along. One second.

- Hey, we got the ferry in five.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll be back.

Yeah.

- Yay!

- Isn't it just like the sea

To come between you and me

On the water you'd be

As I watched with anxiety

You'd say don't hate the sea from the shore

The ocean was here long before

The land

Take my hand

Come out here with me

Of course I'd never leave

And you'd float out to sea

Ah-ah-ah

Ah-ah

Ah-ah-ah-ah

Ah-ah-ah

Ah-ah-ah

Ah-ah-ah

Ah-ah-ah-ah

Ah-ah-ah

Isn't it just like the sea

To come between you and me

Out on the water you'd be

As I watched with anxiety

You'd say don't hate the sea from the shore

The ocean was here long before