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1
00:00:18,146 --> 00:00:20,643
Hey, you got a permit
for those guns?
2
00:00:21,709 --> 00:00:23,606
I got your permit right here.
3
00:00:34,692 --> 00:00:36,123
Catchy tune.
4
00:00:43,447 --> 00:00:45,942
Fuck this game.
5
00:00:46,042 --> 00:00:47,974
FUCK YOU!
6
00:01:22,561 --> 00:01:26,090
We need backup,
we need Kung Fury.
7
00:01:41,835 --> 00:01:44,066
Yeah, that's my bicep.
8
00:01:45,497 --> 00:01:46,696
One second babe.
9
00:01:47,495 --> 00:01:49,359
Hello?
10
00:01:49,460 --> 00:01:51,589
We got an arcade machine
down here going crazy,
11
00:01:51,689 --> 00:01:52,788
it is killing everybody,
it's destruction,
chaos, terror-
12
00:01:54,718 --> 00:01:55,818
What are you gonna do?
13
00:01:55,918 --> 00:01:57,016
My job.
14
00:03:04,194 --> 00:03:05,858
Game over.
15
00:03:11,716 --> 00:03:15,511
I'm a cop and
damn good at my job.
16
00:03:15,611 --> 00:03:17,709
It all began years ago.
17
00:03:17,809 --> 00:03:19,173
In the line of duty,
18
00:03:19,273 --> 00:03:20,538
me and my partner were
chasing down
19
00:03:20,637 --> 00:03:23,967
a mysterious Kung Fu-master.
20
00:03:24,066 --> 00:03:25,565
You're under arrest, punk.
21
00:03:25,665 --> 00:03:26,930
Show us your hands.
22
00:03:28,893 --> 00:03:30,358
Good work, Dragon.
23
00:03:30,459 --> 00:03:32,489
That crazy stunt could've
killed us both.
24
00:03:32,589 --> 00:03:35,019
But goddammit, you're the
best partner I've ever had.
25
00:03:35,119 --> 00:03:38,481
Thanks,
I learned from the best.
26
00:03:38,581 --> 00:03:40,612
You're like a father to me.
27
00:03:40,712 --> 00:03:43,441
With one fatal blow,
he hit my partner.
28
00:03:45,439 --> 00:03:47,636
I could tell
he was dead straight off.
29
00:03:53,861 --> 00:03:56,723
Before I could pull the trigger
30
00:03:56,824 --> 00:04:00,318
I was hit by lightning
and bitten by a cobra.
31
00:04:00,418 --> 00:04:02,582
I blacked out.
32
00:04:05,146 --> 00:04:08,341
And saw images of ancient
Shaolin temples and monks,
33
00:04:08,442 --> 00:04:10,638
mastering the art of Kung Fu.
34
00:04:10,738 --> 00:04:12,169
There was an ancient prophecy,
35
00:04:12,269 --> 00:04:14,666
about a new form
of Kung Fu so powerful,
36
00:04:14,766 --> 00:04:16,831
only one man could master it.
37
00:04:16,930 --> 00:04:18,163
The chosen one.
38
00:04:20,160 --> 00:04:21,723
When I woke up,
39
00:04:21,823 --> 00:04:24,054
I saw the Kung Fu master
running towards me.
40
00:04:24,154 --> 00:04:26,118
I could feel my body mutate
41
00:04:26,218 --> 00:04:29,181
into some sort of
Kung Fu freak of nature.
42
00:04:40,565 --> 00:04:41,798
You!
43
00:04:42,695 --> 00:04:44,094
You are the chosen one!
44
00:04:45,958 --> 00:04:48,156
- Knock, knock.
- Who's there?
45
00:04:49,187 --> 00:04:50,786
Knuckles.
46
00:05:11,359 --> 00:05:13,122
As a memento,
47
00:05:13,221 --> 00:05:15,985
I put on a strip of cloth
from the dead Kung Fu master.
48
00:05:16,085 --> 00:05:18,682
I decided I would use
my new super Kung Fu powers
49
00:05:18,781 --> 00:05:20,246
to fight crime.
50
00:05:20,346 --> 00:05:22,111
So, I became
the best cop in the world.
51
00:05:22,211 --> 00:05:24,774
I became, Kung Fury.
52
00:06:16,172 --> 00:06:18,003
I don't wanna hear it Kung Fury.
53
00:06:18,102 --> 00:06:21,698
I just got back from city hall,
$50 million worth of damages,
54
00:06:21,798 --> 00:06:25,093
and I got the mayor up
my ass like a fag on Viagra.
55
00:06:25,193 --> 00:06:28,921
How am I going to explain
this to the press, hm?
56
00:06:29,021 --> 00:06:32,650
You just destroyed an entire
city block for Christ's sake.
57
00:06:32,749 --> 00:06:34,547
Didn't you tell me
to block it out?
58
00:06:34,647 --> 00:06:36,212
I told you do it by the book.
59
00:06:36,312 --> 00:06:37,610
Cut the bullshit.
60
00:06:37,710 --> 00:06:39,009
Nobody else could have stopped
61
00:06:39,109 --> 00:06:41,073
that arcade machine
and you know it.
62
00:06:43,102 --> 00:06:46,165
Oh man, listen to me Kung Fury.
63
00:06:46,265 --> 00:06:49,761
You need to start following
the rules like the rest of us,
64
00:06:49,861 --> 00:06:51,858
so I'm assigning you
a new partner.
65
00:06:51,959 --> 00:06:53,989
What?
Hell no, I work alone.
66
00:06:54,089 --> 00:06:55,553
Not anymore you don't.
67
00:06:55,653 --> 00:06:59,248
Say hi to your new partner,
Triceracop.
68
00:06:59,347 --> 00:07:01,312
Very nice meeting you Kung Fury,
69
00:07:01,412 --> 00:07:03,775
looking forward to
working with you.
70
00:07:03,876 --> 00:07:05,873
You're like a father to me.
71
00:07:08,435 --> 00:07:10,200
I work alone.
72
00:07:10,300 --> 00:07:12,531
Either you team up
with Triceracop,
73
00:07:12,631 --> 00:07:14,362
or you're off the case.
74
00:07:14,461 --> 00:07:15,993
I'm not off the case,
75
00:07:16,093 --> 00:07:17,125
I quit.
76
00:07:28,243 --> 00:07:31,339
Yeah Yeah, I did the blood test.
77
00:07:31,439 --> 00:07:33,137
It was positive, yeah?
78
00:07:33,237 --> 00:07:34,235
What the hell
are you talking about?
79
00:07:34,335 --> 00:07:36,033
Yeah no problem.
80
00:07:36,133 --> 00:07:37,264
Give me the phone.
81
00:07:43,689 --> 00:07:45,986
What the hell is this?
82
00:07:47,983 --> 00:07:51,679
- Chief McNickles speaking.
- Is this the police?
83
00:07:51,779 --> 00:07:54,209
- Yeah, this is the police.
- Fuck you!
84
00:08:09,921 --> 00:08:11,586
MALFUNCTIONING?
85
00:08:12,818 --> 00:08:15,315
I need someone
to trace that call!
86
00:08:15,415 --> 00:08:17,278
But that's impossible!
87
00:08:17,378 --> 00:08:18,777
Not for me it isn't.
88
00:08:26,067 --> 00:08:28,930
Hackerman, he's the most
powerful hacker of all time.
89
00:08:32,758 --> 00:08:33,824
Follow me.
90
00:08:37,085 --> 00:08:39,316
I was able to triangulate
the cell phone signal
91
00:08:39,416 --> 00:08:40,681
and trace the caller.
92
00:08:42,111 --> 00:08:44,275
His name is Adolf Hitler.
93
00:08:44,376 --> 00:08:47,539
Hitler, he's the worst
criminal of all time.
94
00:08:47,639 --> 00:08:49,069
Do you know him, sir?
95
00:08:49,169 --> 00:08:50,601
I guess you could say that.
96
00:08:50,701 --> 00:08:54,396
In the 1940's,
Hitler was a Kung Fu champion.
97
00:08:54,496 --> 00:08:56,259
He was so good at Kung Fu,
98
00:08:56,359 --> 00:08:59,922
that he decided to change
his name to Kung Führer.
99
00:09:01,020 --> 00:09:02,485
But he didn't stop there.
100
00:09:02,585 --> 00:09:04,548
He knew of
the Kung Fury prophecy,
101
00:09:04,649 --> 00:09:06,379
and wanted to claim the throne.
102
00:09:06,479 --> 00:09:08,610
He and his posse of
Nazi soldiers
103
00:09:08,710 --> 00:09:10,508
conducted experiments
for years.
104
00:09:21,693 --> 00:09:23,291
But they weren't able
to figure out
105
00:09:23,390 --> 00:09:25,888
how to master the art
of Kung Fury.
106
00:09:26,985 --> 00:09:28,450
And one day,
107
00:09:28,550 --> 00:09:30,713
he disappeared
from the face of the earth.
108
00:09:30,813 --> 00:09:33,044
And no-one has seen him
ever since.
109
00:09:33,145 --> 00:09:34,842
Until now.
110
00:09:34,941 --> 00:09:37,771
I guess he figured if he could
find and kill the chosen one,
111
00:09:37,871 --> 00:09:39,835
he would become
Kung Fury himself.
112
00:09:39,935 --> 00:09:42,399
He must have traveled in time
in order to get here,
113
00:09:42,499 --> 00:09:45,195
that's probably why
he disappeared.
114
00:09:45,294 --> 00:09:46,660
So, what're you gonna do?
115
00:09:47,192 --> 00:09:48,558
My job.
116
00:09:48,658 --> 00:09:51,020
I'm gonna go back in time
to Nazi Germany,
117
00:09:51,120 --> 00:09:52,918
and kill Hitler,
once and for all.
118
00:09:53,017 --> 00:09:55,115
So, how are you gonna do that?
119
00:09:55,214 --> 00:09:57,046
I'm not sure.
120
00:09:57,146 --> 00:09:58,944
I need some sort of
time machine.
121
00:10:02,937 --> 00:10:04,436
Wait a minute,
122
00:10:04,536 --> 00:10:06,500
using an RX modulator,
I might be able to conduct
123
00:10:06,600 --> 00:10:09,263
a mainframe cell direct and
hack the uplink to the download.
124
00:10:09,362 --> 00:10:10,961
What does that mean?
125
00:10:11,060 --> 00:10:13,891
With the right algorithms,
I can hack you back in time.
126
00:10:14,889 --> 00:10:16,920
Just like a time machine.
127
00:10:17,020 --> 00:10:19,416
Well then, it's hacking time.
128
00:11:35,782 --> 00:11:36,848
Oh, no!
129
00:12:37,799 --> 00:12:39,698
Fuck!
130
00:12:39,797 --> 00:12:41,428
That's a Laser-Raptor.
131
00:12:41,527 --> 00:12:43,758
I thought they went
extinct thousands of years ago.
132
00:13:08,026 --> 00:13:09,424
Who are you?
133
00:13:09,524 --> 00:13:10,623
My name,
134
00:13:11,987 --> 00:13:13,220
is Barbarianna.
135
00:13:19,743 --> 00:13:21,441
What year is this?
136
00:13:21,541 --> 00:13:23,107
It's the Viking age.
137
00:13:23,206 --> 00:13:25,735
That explains the Laser-Raptor.
Fuck!
138
00:13:25,835 --> 00:13:27,834
I went too far back in time.
139
00:13:27,933 --> 00:13:29,897
You need to get out
of this valley.
140
00:13:29,997 --> 00:13:32,294
This place is swarming
with Laser-Raptors.
141
00:13:32,394 --> 00:13:35,722
I'll meet you at the God's drop.
Katana can help you get there.
142
00:13:35,822 --> 00:13:37,487
Who's Katana?
143
00:13:37,587 --> 00:13:38,719
[KATANA]
I'm Katana.
144
00:13:42,314 --> 00:13:44,644
I can give you a ride to Asgard.
145
00:13:44,744 --> 00:13:46,509
A ride on what?
146
00:14:08,546 --> 00:14:10,810
So, who are you?
147
00:14:10,909 --> 00:14:13,706
I'm a cop from the future.
148
00:14:13,806 --> 00:14:15,903
I was sent back in time
to kill Hitler,
149
00:14:16,003 --> 00:14:20,464
but I accidently went
too far back in time
150
00:14:20,564 --> 00:14:21,896
and ended up in this place.
151
00:14:24,425 --> 00:14:27,288
I know someone
who might be able to help you.
152
00:14:31,249 --> 00:14:35,477
Thor!
153
00:14:50,191 --> 00:14:52,986
Behold! It is me, Thor!
154
00:14:53,086 --> 00:14:56,016
Son of Odin
and protector of mankind.
155
00:14:56,116 --> 00:14:58,047
Check out my pecs.
156
00:14:58,146 --> 00:14:59,545
Your pecs are epic.
157
00:14:59,645 --> 00:15:01,010
Thanks bro!
158
00:15:05,470 --> 00:15:07,835
So, anyway.
159
00:15:07,935 --> 00:15:11,396
Thor, this is Kung Fury,
he's a cop from the future.
160
00:15:11,495 --> 00:15:15,024
Yeah, I need to get to
Nazi Germany and kill Hitler...
161
00:15:15,124 --> 00:15:17,588
- so if you could help me with--
- Stop!
162
00:15:19,586 --> 00:15:20,983
Hammer time.
163
00:15:24,811 --> 00:15:29,572
Walk through this portal and
you'll end up in Nazi Germany.
164
00:15:29,672 --> 00:15:32,202
Good luck to you Kung Fury!
165
00:15:32,302 --> 00:15:33,367
Thanks Thor!
166
00:15:39,992 --> 00:15:42,821
Well,
looks like this is my ride.
167
00:15:42,921 --> 00:15:46,450
Hey, future cop,
where are you going?
168
00:15:50,844 --> 00:15:53,907
You know what.
Here, take my number.
169
00:15:54,805 --> 00:15:57,035
And use this phone to call me.
170
00:15:57,135 --> 00:16:00,131
It's a personal, transportable,
cellular telephone.
171
00:16:00,231 --> 00:16:03,493
It features 645 channel
capacity,
172
00:16:03,593 --> 00:16:07,821
10 number speed dial,
and an electronic security lock.
173
00:16:07,921 --> 00:16:11,184
This revolution in communication
could make it possible
174
00:16:11,283 --> 00:16:14,379
for more and more people
to have a phone in their car!
175
00:17:33,042 --> 00:17:34,739
Tank you.
176
00:17:42,728 --> 00:17:47,622
I'm the greatest Kung Fu master
of all time,
177
00:17:47,722 --> 00:17:49,021
right guys?
178
00:17:56,244 --> 00:17:58,674
Thank you!
179
00:18:11,757 --> 00:18:13,588
I'm disarming you.
180
00:18:13,687 --> 00:18:15,752
My arm! My arm!
181
00:18:29,501 --> 00:18:30,699
Kill him!
182
00:20:02,842 --> 00:20:04,508
You don't need that spine,
183
00:20:06,638 --> 00:20:08,036
it's holding your back!
184
00:20:37,997 --> 00:20:39,128
A-ha!
185
00:20:39,228 --> 00:20:40,626
Fuck you Kung Fury.
186
00:20:40,726 --> 00:20:44,687
Now nothing can stop me
and my army of death.
187
00:20:56,871 --> 00:20:58,104
Thank you guys!
188
00:21:05,260 --> 00:21:06,692
What the fuck?
189
00:21:50,300 --> 00:21:51,598
Kill them!
190
00:22:46,693 --> 00:22:51,986
Alright Hitler, the gig is up,
show me your hands.
191
00:23:09,794 --> 00:23:12,858
Hackerman,
have you seen Kung Fury?
192
00:23:15,121 --> 00:23:17,618
Oh, no! We were too late.
193
00:23:20,281 --> 00:23:24,875
[UPBEAT 80'S SYNTHPOP MUSIC]
194
00:23:55,069 --> 00:23:56,666
Who the hell are you?
195
00:23:56,766 --> 00:23:59,862
My name is Cobra.
196
00:23:59,962 --> 00:24:03,591
I've been expecting you
Kung Fury.
197
00:24:03,691 --> 00:24:05,921
I'm your spirit animal.
198
00:24:06,021 --> 00:24:07,885
What the hell is this place?
199
00:24:07,985 --> 00:24:12,379
This is heaven,
I'm afraid you're dead.
200
00:24:13,078 --> 00:24:14,577
What?
201
00:24:14,677 --> 00:24:16,973
But it looks so real.
202
00:24:17,073 --> 00:24:21,200
Yeah, no it's totally real.
203
00:24:21,300 --> 00:24:23,430
Mr. Cobra, I'm a police officer.
204
00:24:23,531 --> 00:24:26,893
I need you to send me
back to earth, pronto.
205
00:24:26,993 --> 00:24:29,190
I'm sorry,
I can't help you with that.
206
00:24:29,290 --> 00:24:31,985
You see, you're dead.
207
00:24:32,086 --> 00:24:34,317
- You're under arrest!
- What?
208
00:24:34,417 --> 00:24:39,077
For obstruction of justice,
you're breaking the law!
209
00:24:52,792 --> 00:24:54,323
What the hell happened?
210
00:24:54,423 --> 00:24:57,053
I hacked away all of
your bullet wounds Kung Fury.
211
00:24:57,153 --> 00:24:58,385
Thanks!
212
00:25:19,590 --> 00:25:23,551
I want to welcome you
and your friends to Germany.
213
00:25:26,281 --> 00:25:28,945
We are not so different,
you and I.
214
00:25:29,044 --> 00:25:32,440
I mean we both got
good style, you know?
215
00:25:32,539 --> 00:25:34,204
Red, you know?
216
00:25:34,903 --> 00:25:36,168
So, that's cool!
217
00:25:38,432 --> 00:25:41,761
We both like doing moves,
check it out!
218
00:25:43,858 --> 00:25:48,086
And killing people, I love it,
you clearly do, too!
219
00:25:48,984 --> 00:25:50,416
And that's cool!
220
00:25:51,614 --> 00:25:53,046
Join me,
221
00:25:53,145 --> 00:25:56,508
we could be brothers,
we are so alike.
222
00:25:56,607 --> 00:25:59,404
It's almost like
we finish each other's...
223
00:25:59,504 --> 00:26:01,035
- Balls.
- What?
224
00:26:23,405 --> 00:26:25,770
Oh, my,
not much left of him is there?
225
00:26:25,869 --> 00:26:27,733
The important thing is that
he is gone.
226
00:26:29,131 --> 00:26:31,161
Sorry I doubted you Triceracop.
227
00:26:31,262 --> 00:26:33,192
You're the best damn partner
I've ever had.
228
00:26:33,292 --> 00:26:36,355
I came back in time
for you Kung Fury,
229
00:26:36,455 --> 00:26:38,751
because, damn it,
I love you.
230
00:26:42,780 --> 00:26:46,075
Team work is very important.
231
00:26:47,406 --> 00:26:50,436
So, what happens now Kung Fury?
232
00:26:53,298 --> 00:26:55,563
Well, I need to
head back to the office.
233
00:26:57,427 --> 00:27:00,057
Looks like it's gonna be
hell of a lot of paperwork.
234
00:27:22,627 --> 00:27:24,058
Open the doors, Hoff.
235
00:27:24,158 --> 00:27:26,888
I'm sorry Fury,
I can't let you do that.
236
00:27:26,988 --> 00:27:28,686
Open the doors, Hoff!
237
00:27:28,786 --> 00:27:31,980
I'm sorry, I can't let you
open the doors Kung Fury.
238
00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:33,711
Goddammit, open the doors!
239
00:27:33,811 --> 00:27:37,408
- Sorry I can't--
- Open the doors!
240
00:27:37,508 --> 00:27:43,000
Did anyone ever tell you
not to hassle the Hoff 9000?
241
00:27:43,100 --> 00:27:46,130
Oh, Hoff 9000,
you son of a bitch.
242
00:28:00,643 --> 00:28:02,673
Piece of shit.
243
00:28:18,486 --> 00:28:20,716
Oh, my,
not much left of him is there?
244
00:28:20,816 --> 00:28:24,178
The important thing is that
he is gone.
245
00:28:35,897 --> 00:28:37,361
Game over.
246
00:28:38,992 --> 00:28:40,424
Wait a minute,
247
00:28:42,021 --> 00:28:44,352
I've seen that symbol before...
248
00:28:46,516 --> 00:28:47,881
somewhere.
249
00:28:57,268 --> 00:28:58,466
Hitler!
17337
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