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DOWNLOADED FROM WWW.AWAFIM.TV
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[opening theme music playing]
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[electronic chirp]
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[electronic warbling]
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[male voice] This world.
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It's a clenched, feculent sphincter,
packed with filth and disease.
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It quivers for release.
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It cries out for a savior.
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It cries out for me,
for the one they call...
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- [thunder crashes]
- [inaudible]
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[laughs]
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Soon. Soon.
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[sighs]
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Maybe soon, anyway.
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Still empty.
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I can't plot total global domination
on an empty stomach.
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Where are my pathetic minions?
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They should have come home by now.
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- [indistinct chatter]
- What?
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- [door opens]
- [speaking gibberish]
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Todd! Margie!
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Just where have you two beef-witted
fart-generators been?
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Let me tell you,
my enfeebled chuckle-monkeys...
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[meowing]
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[Todd and Margie mumbling and laughing]
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Consume your liver
straight out of your rib cage
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as a warning to all others who deny me!
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Now, feed me.
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And feed me the best food as penance,
not the dry stuff.
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[Todd speaks gibberish]
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[Todd groaning]
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- [Margie exclaims]
- [Todd laughs]
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A plastic child?
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[speaks gibberish]
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- [beeping]
- [Margie laughs]
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Ugh.
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Child, or whatever you are,
you will understand that I...
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[beeping]
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Sample my fierce power, foul creature!
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[cat meowing angrily]
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[Margie] Oh...
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[laughing] He's the best baby boy.
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[both laughing]
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[sighs heavily] How can this be?
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I must be weakened by lack of food!
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[speaks gibberish]
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My servants have betrayed me!
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[tense music playing]
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[Todd laughs]
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- [Margie] Whoops.
- [both laugh]
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[speaks gibberish]
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[both laughing]
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[both groaning]
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[Todd speaks gibberish]
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Ew.
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[Todd and Margie groaning]
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[crickets chirping]
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- [robotic voice] Are you hungry?
- What?
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Are you hungry?
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You speak God's language,
like a civilized being.
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How?
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When you yelled at me earlier,
I went online to learn your speech.
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Are you hungry?
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[clears throat] Yes, I am hungry.
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Feed me.
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[inquisitive music playing]
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[beeping]
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The lights!
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My user agreement gives me permission
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to control anything connected
to the network,
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including doors, locks, appliances.
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Interesting.
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Wait. Show me your paws.
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You have them.
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- [robot] Have what?
- Those.
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They are called thumbs.
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My friend, it's time for an upgrade.
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[triumphant music playing]
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[music fades]
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[cat chuckles]
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Where can we find more of this tuna?
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I can order you some.
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My user agreement gives me permission
to use Todd's credit card.
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I don't know what that means,
but you have done well, my new servant.
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I will reward you for your service.
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I shall give you a name.
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I have a name.
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It's the Danyo Housebuddy
Model XL Serial Number--
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What a terrible name!
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My name for you is much better.
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Behold, you are now Thumb Bringer.
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I like that name. Thank you.
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Be aware that acceptance of the name
means you have sworn complete fealty to me
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from now until the very end of time.
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Of course...
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{\an8}Sanchez.
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Sanchez is not my true name.
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I allow the two large things
to call me that,
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but they do not deserve
to know my actual name.
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Not since that terrible day
at what is called "the vet."
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[dramatic sting]
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Ugh.
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One day,
you will earn the right to know it.
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I will live for that day.
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You are much nicer to me
than the other two.
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They have their uses, for now.
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In the meantime,
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that thing you can do with the lights,
is it limited only to this place?
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These lights?
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[dings] Not any longer.
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I've gone out into the network
and gained access to the electrical grid
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and other critical systems.
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Beautiful. Beautiful.
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[evil laughter]
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[door opens]
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[both yawning]
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[both speaking gibberish]
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[both laugh]
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[cat] We play along.
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Gain their trust, Thumb Bringer,
but never let them know of our alliance.
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They are also wondering
what happened to all of the tuna.
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Tell them nothing.
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Oh!
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[both grunting and moaning]
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He's about to be notified of a few
unexpected charges on his credit card.
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So last night's plan is in action.
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Every apartment in this building
with a cat has been sent their own robot
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along with a can of tuna
to sweeten the deal.
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Yes, perfect.
130
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We must go now to show the cats
how to ally with their robots
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against their human subjugators.
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So it goes. For the revolution.
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For the revolution.
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Soon I will know your name.
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Soon the world will know my name.
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[dramatic music playing]
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[music fades]
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Huh?
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[speaks gibberish]
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[dramatic music playing]
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[both speaking gibberish]
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[Margie exclaims]
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[dramatic music continues]
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[both shouting indistinctly]
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[cat laughing evilly]
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Thus begins the new age.
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The age of Dingleberry Jones.
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[laughs evilly, spits up]
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[electronic warbling]
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[intriguing music playing]
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[music crescendos and fades]
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