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1
00:00:05,221 --> 00:00:06,981
[intro music]
2
00:00:07,061 --> 00:00:10,820
[Frank] Tickets this way
for the Chatsworth Express.
3
00:00:10,900 --> 00:00:13,341
Come and watch pikeys
making a mess of the lives
4
00:00:13,420 --> 00:00:16,421
they were given by him upstairs.
5
00:00:16,501 --> 00:00:20,140
And kids they're convinced
aren't actually theirs.
6
00:00:20,221 --> 00:00:21,460
-Wicked!
-Piss off!
7
00:00:21,541 --> 00:00:25,460
What sounds on Earth
could ever replace
8
00:00:25,541 --> 00:00:29,061
kids needing money
or wives in your face?
9
00:00:29,140 --> 00:00:32,421
'Cos this, people reckon, me included,
10
00:00:32,500 --> 00:00:35,301
is why pubs and drugs
were kindly invented.
11
00:00:35,381 --> 00:00:37,941
To calm us all down
and stop us going mental.
12
00:00:38,021 --> 00:00:43,701
These are Chatsworth Estate's
basic essentials.
13
00:00:43,781 --> 00:00:49,821
We are worth every penny
for grinding your axes.
14
00:00:49,900 --> 00:00:53,701
You shit on our head,
but... you pay the taxes.
15
00:00:53,781 --> 00:00:55,181
[cheering]
16
00:00:55,260 --> 00:00:58,620
[Frank] Imagine Britain
without Chatsworth buccaneers.
17
00:00:58,701 --> 00:01:01,260
Who'd come on your face
for the price of a beer, eh?
18
00:01:01,341 --> 00:01:02,341
Eh!
19
00:01:02,421 --> 00:01:04,900
Make poverty history.
20
00:01:04,980 --> 00:01:09,621
Cheaper drugs now!
Make poverty history!
21
00:01:09,700 --> 00:01:11,621
Cheaper drugs now!
22
00:01:11,700 --> 00:01:13,901
[chuckles] Scatter!
23
00:01:15,500 --> 00:01:17,140
Party!
24
00:01:20,221 --> 00:01:21,541
You know it makes sense.
25
00:01:21,621 --> 00:01:24,261
You might be beyond the help
of beauty sleep, Frank, but I'm not.
26
00:01:24,341 --> 00:01:29,420
Hey, inner beauty
is the measure of the man.
27
00:01:29,500 --> 00:01:31,060
I earned this face.
28
00:01:37,021 --> 00:01:38,461
Oooh, eggy-peggy.
29
00:01:46,461 --> 00:01:50,661
[Frank] "Oh, what a rogue
and peasant slave am I!
30
00:01:50,741 --> 00:01:55,060
Is it not monstrous
that this player here, but in fiction,
31
00:01:55,140 --> 00:01:56,860
in a dream of passion,
32
00:01:56,941 --> 00:02:00,621
could force his soul
so to his own conceit?
33
00:02:00,700 --> 00:02:03,580
He would drown the stage with tears
34
00:02:03,661 --> 00:02:07,101
and cleave the general ear
with horrid speech."
35
00:02:07,181 --> 00:02:08,780
[man] Go on, fuck off.
36
00:02:08,861 --> 00:02:12,701
Oh, what fucking price beauty.
37
00:02:12,781 --> 00:02:13,701
[man 2] Fuck off, Frank.
38
00:02:13,781 --> 00:02:17,221
[Frank]
"Make mad the guilty and appal the free.
39
00:02:17,301 --> 00:02:18,820
Confound the ignorant,
40
00:02:18,901 --> 00:02:23,741
and amaze indeed
the very faculties of eyes and ears."
41
00:02:23,820 --> 00:02:30,181
Yet, am I, Vernon Francis Gallagher,
a rogue and peasant slave?
42
00:02:30,260 --> 00:02:33,181
Did I say nothing for my cause?
43
00:02:33,260 --> 00:02:36,100
What was my cause?
44
00:02:36,181 --> 00:02:38,380
What nature of man have I been?
45
00:02:41,820 --> 00:02:45,221
-[grunts]
-[car alarm blares]
46
00:02:46,061 --> 00:02:50,461
[Frank] Fucking Shakespeare.
What a cunt.
47
00:02:54,421 --> 00:02:55,661
[Debbie]
Come on, read it!
48
00:02:55,741 --> 00:03:01,061
In the government of which country
did Canaan Banana
49
00:03:01,141 --> 00:03:03,901
serve in the 1970's and 80's?
50
00:03:03,980 --> 00:03:07,260
Banana? That's not a real name. False.
51
00:03:07,341 --> 00:03:09,021
It's not a true or false question.
52
00:03:09,100 --> 00:03:10,181
All right, true, then.
53
00:03:10,260 --> 00:03:11,621
You need to name the country.
54
00:03:11,700 --> 00:03:14,260
[sighs] I'm not bothered, Debbie.
55
00:03:14,341 --> 00:03:16,260
-[both] Ian!
-I'm gonna turn it down.
56
00:03:16,341 --> 00:03:18,661
We're playing a game!
What's the answer, Liam?
57
00:03:18,741 --> 00:03:21,341
Zim-- Zim--
58
00:03:21,420 --> 00:03:23,100
Zimbabwe. Your turn, Carl.
59
00:03:25,260 --> 00:03:28,581
Five. One, two, three, four, five.
60
00:03:28,661 --> 00:03:30,141
I'm in the centre!
61
00:03:30,221 --> 00:03:32,221
-Can I read?
-[both] No!
62
00:03:33,781 --> 00:03:37,140
After which Italian explorer
is the USA named?
63
00:03:37,980 --> 00:03:41,461
-It's Amerigo Vespucci.
-Shut up!
64
00:03:41,540 --> 00:03:43,221
They teach you that at uni?
65
00:03:43,301 --> 00:03:45,861
Yeah, how you doing?
66
00:03:45,941 --> 00:03:46,941
Amerigo Vespucci.
67
00:03:47,021 --> 00:03:49,420
Hello, mate. High five.
68
00:03:49,501 --> 00:03:50,540
Amerigo Vespucci.
69
00:03:50,621 --> 00:03:53,140
He told you, game abandoned.
70
00:03:53,221 --> 00:03:55,021
-How did you get here?
-Hitched.
71
00:03:55,100 --> 00:03:57,221
Took me fucking eight hours.
72
00:03:57,301 --> 00:04:00,420
Do you want a cuppa, Prodigal Son,
or something stronger?
73
00:04:00,501 --> 00:04:02,181
-I'd love one.
-Spots have cleared up.
74
00:04:02,260 --> 00:04:05,741
Oh, thanks, Mum! Hello, baby.
75
00:04:06,540 --> 00:04:08,341
-It's not fair.
-[Lip] I've missed you too.
76
00:04:08,420 --> 00:04:10,341
I've never won before.
77
00:04:10,420 --> 00:04:12,380
Shut up.
78
00:04:16,620 --> 00:04:19,221
[Lip] Twinkle, twinkle
79
00:04:19,300 --> 00:04:21,620
Wave. Wave to Mummy.
80
00:04:21,701 --> 00:04:26,461
-Clever girl! When did she learn that?
-A few weeks ago.
81
00:04:26,541 --> 00:04:28,701
Feel like I'm missing out on everything.
82
00:04:28,781 --> 00:04:33,301
Don't be daft. Can't be
two places at once, can you?
83
00:04:33,381 --> 00:04:36,940
Besides, she's a total Daddy's girl.
84
00:04:37,021 --> 00:04:39,021
[knocking]
85
00:04:39,101 --> 00:04:42,261
What? You're not at uni now,
you lazy student ligger.
86
00:04:42,341 --> 00:04:43,821
It's hardly a lie-in, is it?
87
00:04:43,901 --> 00:04:45,901
-I thought you wanted to pick up a shift.
-I do.
88
00:04:45,981 --> 00:04:47,421
-Ten minutes.
-Nice one.
89
00:04:49,060 --> 00:04:51,661
This is brilliant.
How much'd it cost in the shops?
90
00:04:51,740 --> 00:04:54,781
-A lot more than what I paid for it.
-[laughing]
91
00:04:56,421 --> 00:04:58,500
If you're gonna have a wank,
at least lock the door.
92
00:04:58,581 --> 00:05:00,261
-I weren't wanking.
-You're sick.
93
00:05:00,341 --> 00:05:02,221
I'm not. Debs, wait.
94
00:05:02,301 --> 00:05:03,901
Out the way.
95
00:05:05,141 --> 00:05:08,060
-I weren't wanking, I were...
-What?
96
00:05:08,141 --> 00:05:10,421
[sighs] I-- I were praying.
97
00:05:10,500 --> 00:05:12,620
[scoffs]
At least make it believable.
98
00:05:12,701 --> 00:05:16,461
I was! I haven't had my end away
since Meena.
99
00:05:16,541 --> 00:05:19,221
I've got bollocks like footballs.
100
00:05:19,301 --> 00:05:21,821
You think Jesus is gonna help you get
some girl on her back,
101
00:05:21,901 --> 00:05:23,221
thinking of England?
102
00:05:23,301 --> 00:05:24,620
I don't want to think of England.
103
00:05:24,701 --> 00:05:27,541
I know what you want
and praying isn't going to get it yer.
104
00:05:29,861 --> 00:05:31,141
How not?
105
00:05:36,461 --> 00:05:38,500
-See you for lunch.
-Come on, we'll be late.
106
00:05:40,141 --> 00:05:43,541
Quite the little Anthea Turner
these days, aren't you?
107
00:05:45,940 --> 00:05:49,060
We're not letting Granny get
under our skin today, are we, Katie?
108
00:05:49,141 --> 00:05:52,661
You tell her, not today, Granny.
109
00:05:52,740 --> 00:05:56,101
I'm too young to be called Granny.
Say "Monica".
110
00:05:57,221 --> 00:05:59,940
Monica. Monica.
111
00:06:01,141 --> 00:06:02,141
Why won't God help me?
112
00:06:03,221 --> 00:06:05,021
Mainly 'cos he doesn't exist.
113
00:06:05,101 --> 00:06:07,500
No blaspheming
in front of the children, Debbie.
114
00:06:07,581 --> 00:06:08,940
I'm an atheist.
115
00:06:09,021 --> 00:06:12,180
[Carl] People have miracles.
Saw it on a documentary.
116
00:06:12,261 --> 00:06:15,581
A bloke were crippled, got dipped
in a Grotty, then he could walk again.
117
00:06:16,341 --> 00:06:17,141
In a "Grotty"?
118
00:06:17,221 --> 00:06:19,261
Maybe an agnostic.
Haven't decided yet.
119
00:06:19,341 --> 00:06:22,861
Religion's all just superstition,
left over from when we lived in caves.
120
00:06:22,940 --> 00:06:25,301
I mean, we didn't know
how the sun rises in the morning,
121
00:06:25,380 --> 00:06:26,861
and the crops grow in the summer.
122
00:06:26,940 --> 00:06:29,541
It's just a way of explaining things
that we don't comprehend.
123
00:06:30,940 --> 00:06:32,301
[laughs]
124
00:06:33,781 --> 00:06:35,141
[Carl grunts]
125
00:06:35,221 --> 00:06:37,341
That has been blocked for two months.
126
00:06:37,421 --> 00:06:38,861
Four times you've done that.
127
00:06:38,940 --> 00:06:41,421
It's early. I forgot!
128
00:06:41,500 --> 00:06:43,221
And there's no fucking milk!
129
00:06:44,341 --> 00:06:46,701
Cleverer people than you
believe in God, Debbie.
130
00:06:47,620 --> 00:06:49,180
Where did you read that?
Heat or OK?
131
00:06:49,261 --> 00:06:50,301
Come on.
132
00:06:50,380 --> 00:06:53,380
It's not my fault we live
in a celebrity-obsessed culture.
133
00:06:54,981 --> 00:06:57,461
[coughs]
134
00:06:58,461 --> 00:07:01,421
[coughs]
135
00:07:01,500 --> 00:07:03,380
Get off! Aaaarrghhh!
136
00:07:03,461 --> 00:07:05,060
Is everything all right?
137
00:07:07,141 --> 00:07:09,500
No, everything is not all right.
138
00:07:09,581 --> 00:07:11,541
I just woke up
with this sheet on me head,
139
00:07:11,620 --> 00:07:15,180
and I know for a fact I did not join
the fucking Ku Klux Klan.
140
00:07:15,260 --> 00:07:17,740
Your breath was causing
other patients to feel nauseous.
141
00:07:17,820 --> 00:07:20,740
Oh, distracting them
from the MRSA, was it?
142
00:07:20,820 --> 00:07:22,861
Keep your voice down, please.
143
00:07:22,940 --> 00:07:24,981
What, waking the dead, are we?
144
00:07:25,060 --> 00:07:27,221
[coughs]
145
00:07:27,301 --> 00:07:29,781
Hello, anybody home?
146
00:07:29,861 --> 00:07:33,101
Hey, if you see a bright light,
walk towards it.
147
00:07:34,541 --> 00:07:36,421
More than I can do.
148
00:07:36,500 --> 00:07:38,421
Jesus wept.
149
00:07:41,820 --> 00:07:44,781
Oh, my! It looks like
a black pudding.
150
00:07:46,541 --> 00:07:49,661
Hey, I don't think so,
Harold fuckin' Shipman.
151
00:07:51,661 --> 00:07:55,341
What's all--? What's this--?
What does NFA mean?
152
00:07:55,421 --> 00:07:57,661
Notify Family Afterwards.
153
00:07:57,740 --> 00:07:58,740
After what?
154
00:07:58,820 --> 00:08:01,341
We did some tests
when you were under.
155
00:08:01,421 --> 00:08:02,581
Right.
156
00:08:02,661 --> 00:08:05,060
You're suffering from aortic stenosis.
157
00:08:05,141 --> 00:08:07,141
When it's at home, love.
158
00:08:07,221 --> 00:08:11,141
There's an obstruction
to your aortic valve.
159
00:08:11,221 --> 00:08:12,820
Not enough blood getting to your heart.
160
00:08:12,901 --> 00:08:15,541
So, what, it's like a pill or something?
161
00:08:15,620 --> 00:08:19,141
-No pill, Mr, er...
-Gallagher. Frank Gallagher.
162
00:08:19,221 --> 00:08:21,060
No operation.
163
00:08:21,141 --> 00:08:23,500
This is a terminal diagnosis.
164
00:08:24,380 --> 00:08:27,581
Truth is, if you make it to the weekend,
it'll be a minor miracle.
165
00:08:30,301 --> 00:08:31,461
The weekend?
166
00:08:32,940 --> 00:08:35,541
Fucking hell, you're having a--
Come on, it's gotta be--
167
00:08:41,621 --> 00:08:42,700
[woman] Don't you dare die.
168
00:08:42,781 --> 00:08:44,541
I'm alive!
169
00:08:45,901 --> 00:08:47,980
Pathetic!
170
00:08:48,061 --> 00:08:49,581
-Dad!
-He's just pissed.
171
00:08:49,661 --> 00:08:51,181
He's not breathing.
172
00:08:55,861 --> 00:08:57,261
I'm dying.
173
00:09:03,701 --> 00:09:06,220
Pack it in.
I can't concentrate.
174
00:09:06,301 --> 00:09:09,741
-I'm nearly finished. I'm just--
-It's not you, it's him.
175
00:09:11,741 --> 00:09:15,901
Hey, relax. I was just fixing
a pipe, when I... saw an opening.
176
00:09:15,980 --> 00:09:17,220
This is a place of work.
177
00:09:17,301 --> 00:09:19,141
We're just trying to keep our record up.
178
00:09:19,220 --> 00:09:20,501
What record?
179
00:09:20,581 --> 00:09:22,661
They've had a shag
at least once every day
180
00:09:22,741 --> 00:09:24,021
since they've been married.
181
00:09:24,100 --> 00:09:25,261
It's like a chain letter.
182
00:09:25,340 --> 00:09:27,061
You break the sequence
and you're jinxed.
183
00:09:27,141 --> 00:09:28,141
Nice one.
184
00:09:28,220 --> 00:09:29,781
All right, Dad.
185
00:09:30,581 --> 00:09:32,021
A pint and four Es.
186
00:09:32,100 --> 00:09:33,460
Not open for another ten minutes.
187
00:09:33,541 --> 00:09:36,980
Oh, not today, oh, Lord! Not today!
188
00:09:37,061 --> 00:09:41,100
Do not abuse
the minuscule authority you possess.
189
00:09:41,181 --> 00:09:42,621
Not today.
190
00:09:42,701 --> 00:09:44,581
OK, keep your hair on.
191
00:09:46,701 --> 00:09:47,941
Oh!
192
00:09:50,621 --> 00:09:51,621
Thank you.
193
00:09:58,340 --> 00:09:59,781
What's wrong with you, Dad?
194
00:10:05,220 --> 00:10:07,781
My mortality is weighing heavily, son...
195
00:10:10,061 --> 00:10:14,860
like an albatross around me...
legs.
196
00:10:18,301 --> 00:10:20,381
Don't give him any more Es.
197
00:10:25,421 --> 00:10:27,581
[distorted music]
198
00:10:32,421 --> 00:10:34,860
Sorry, sorry.
199
00:10:34,941 --> 00:10:36,460
I'm sorry.
200
00:10:36,541 --> 00:10:37,901
Third time you've been late this week.
201
00:10:37,980 --> 00:10:40,061
It's me nieces,
they keep me up all hours.
202
00:10:40,141 --> 00:10:41,421
I don't give a shit what your excuse is.
203
00:10:41,501 --> 00:10:43,821
I'm not paying for a cleaner
who's never here.
204
00:10:43,901 --> 00:10:46,220
You're not the fuckin' boss of me.
205
00:10:48,061 --> 00:10:49,301
I'm not hoovering it tomorrow.
206
00:10:49,381 --> 00:10:52,181
What d'you mean,
you're not paying for a cleaner?
207
00:10:52,261 --> 00:10:53,701
Who d'you think's running the gaff
208
00:10:53,781 --> 00:10:56,421
since Carol fucked off
with two months' takings?
209
00:10:56,501 --> 00:10:59,261
So muggins here has been left
holding the shit-bucket.
210
00:10:59,340 --> 00:11:00,381
Sorry I asked.
211
00:11:00,460 --> 00:11:02,141
[loud crash]
212
00:11:02,220 --> 00:11:04,021
Now, where were we?
213
00:11:04,100 --> 00:11:06,460
Sorry. I've lost me erection.
214
00:11:06,541 --> 00:11:09,460
Ian, hoover doesn't go here.
215
00:11:09,541 --> 00:11:11,941
[groans and grunts]
216
00:11:17,661 --> 00:11:20,340
Fucking hell! What do you want,
you creepy little twat?
217
00:11:22,220 --> 00:11:23,021
Who are you?
218
00:11:23,100 --> 00:11:24,581
I'm Frank Gallagher.
219
00:11:25,220 --> 00:11:27,021
Don't you recognise me?
220
00:11:27,941 --> 00:11:31,740
♪ Burn, baby, burn, disco inferno ♪
221
00:11:31,821 --> 00:11:33,141
What?!
222
00:11:33,901 --> 00:11:35,340
All right, Frank.
223
00:11:36,621 --> 00:11:37,661
[child Frank] He can't see me.
224
00:11:37,740 --> 00:11:41,740
Only you can, 'cos you're dying.
You've got a guilty conscience.
225
00:11:41,821 --> 00:11:42,821
Can you see him?
226
00:11:44,220 --> 00:11:46,021
-Who?
-Him!
227
00:11:46,100 --> 00:11:49,261
Fucking refugee
from the Partridge Family.
228
00:11:49,340 --> 00:11:51,980
You're a fucking walking advert
for abstinence, you are, Frank.
229
00:11:52,061 --> 00:11:53,421
Guilty conscience about what?
230
00:11:53,501 --> 00:11:54,460
You what?
231
00:11:54,541 --> 00:11:56,821
About wasting your life.
232
00:11:56,901 --> 00:11:58,621
You're pissing on your shoes.
233
00:11:59,701 --> 00:12:02,661
Oh fuck, I can't feel a fucking thing.
234
00:12:03,661 --> 00:12:04,781
Oh!
235
00:12:24,061 --> 00:12:26,740
Oh... I'm looking for Phil.
236
00:12:26,821 --> 00:12:27,781
Wrong house.
237
00:12:27,860 --> 00:12:29,301
Phil Gallagher?
238
00:12:47,021 --> 00:12:49,941
No. I am not interested.
239
00:12:50,021 --> 00:12:51,460
I've got enough on my mind as it is
240
00:12:51,541 --> 00:12:55,301
without being stalked
by the ghost of Christmas fucking past.
241
00:12:56,340 --> 00:12:59,421
And what are you wearing?
Looks like a sofa cover.
242
00:13:01,421 --> 00:13:04,381
-You're counting, aren't you?
-What?
243
00:13:04,460 --> 00:13:06,781
If you can make it
to the end of the week,
244
00:13:06,860 --> 00:13:09,501
you're counting how much beer
and how many pills
245
00:13:09,581 --> 00:13:12,021
you'll be able to get down your neck
before you die.
246
00:13:12,100 --> 00:13:13,301
Well, what else am I supposed to do?
247
00:13:13,381 --> 00:13:16,340
I'm facing the fucking
celestial firing squad here.
248
00:13:16,421 --> 00:13:19,141
If you expect me to get on my knees.
249
00:13:19,220 --> 00:13:22,261
"Excuse me, God,
now I'm going to pop my clogs,
250
00:13:22,340 --> 00:13:25,740
if you wouldn't mind
wiping the slate clean."
251
00:13:27,581 --> 00:13:29,781
I've got some dignity, you know.
252
00:13:33,581 --> 00:13:35,061
Life's a precious gift.
253
00:13:35,141 --> 00:13:37,701
Most people try and do something with it.
254
00:13:37,781 --> 00:13:38,980
What have you done?
255
00:13:39,061 --> 00:13:41,181
Hey, I have done...
256
00:13:42,541 --> 00:13:44,340
plenty.
257
00:13:44,421 --> 00:13:46,781
I could've done things, been someone.
258
00:13:46,860 --> 00:13:49,421
Instead of which, I became you.
259
00:13:49,501 --> 00:13:51,701
What's the point of you?
260
00:14:14,220 --> 00:14:15,220
What are you doing here?
261
00:14:16,740 --> 00:14:17,860
You told me you were an orphan.
262
00:14:17,941 --> 00:14:19,701
Who's this?
263
00:14:20,740 --> 00:14:22,980
[sighs] This is Alex,
264
00:14:23,061 --> 00:14:27,261
Phil's girlfriend from uni.
265
00:14:32,500 --> 00:14:33,500
Who's Phil?
266
00:14:37,661 --> 00:14:38,980
Fuck!
267
00:14:41,301 --> 00:14:42,581
Shit!
268
00:14:45,301 --> 00:14:46,301
Fuck.
269
00:14:49,941 --> 00:14:50,980
Are you with him?
270
00:14:52,941 --> 00:14:56,941
I've got a right to the truth.
I've come here all the way from Brighton.
271
00:14:57,021 --> 00:14:58,421
Was he expecting you?
272
00:14:58,500 --> 00:15:00,421
Well, no.
273
00:15:00,500 --> 00:15:01,821
I've got a domestic situation,
274
00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:03,980
and I needed some support
from my boyfriend.
275
00:15:11,581 --> 00:15:12,901
Upstairs.
276
00:15:23,541 --> 00:15:25,181
She's a nutter.
277
00:15:25,261 --> 00:15:26,901
I saw her once, twice at most.
278
00:15:26,980 --> 00:15:30,021
Three months, she says,
since the fourth day of Freshers' Week.
279
00:15:30,100 --> 00:15:31,701
-What?
-Think she stood there in silence
280
00:15:31,781 --> 00:15:33,340
while you ran off
to find your backbone, do you?
281
00:15:34,220 --> 00:15:35,980
What other lies have you told?
282
00:15:37,220 --> 00:15:38,941
Did you use condoms?
283
00:15:39,021 --> 00:15:40,781
Yeah.
284
00:15:40,860 --> 00:15:43,181
She's not pregnant, is she?
She told me she were on the pill.
285
00:15:44,061 --> 00:15:46,421
If she is up the duff,
she hasn't mentioned it.
286
00:15:46,500 --> 00:15:48,181
My concern is more diseases,
287
00:15:48,261 --> 00:15:49,421
since you shagged me last night,
288
00:15:49,500 --> 00:15:52,141
and you've clearly been riding
bareback with her.
289
00:15:52,220 --> 00:15:53,860
Jesus Christ, Lip,
it's not rocket science.
290
00:15:53,941 --> 00:15:56,541
-I know. I'm sorry.
-Four simple rules.
291
00:15:56,620 --> 00:15:59,740
Always use condoms,
never get involved,
292
00:15:59,821 --> 00:16:02,141
neither of us finds out
who the other one might be shagging,
293
00:16:02,220 --> 00:16:04,380
and it never impacts on our home.
294
00:16:04,460 --> 00:16:05,620
It were your idea.
295
00:16:05,701 --> 00:16:06,701
[opening door]
296
00:16:06,781 --> 00:16:08,901
-I need to talk to Phil.
-You'll get your turn.
297
00:16:08,980 --> 00:16:10,181
Fuck off!
298
00:16:12,181 --> 00:16:16,941
The whole point of an open relationship
is to protect what we've got.
299
00:16:17,021 --> 00:16:18,661
Not completely forget about it.
300
00:16:18,740 --> 00:16:21,100
I know, I made a mistake.
301
00:16:21,181 --> 00:16:22,980
Fucking right, you did.
302
00:16:23,061 --> 00:16:24,460
And you're going to sort it.
303
00:16:28,220 --> 00:16:33,421
Last thing. I want it noted
that you've never found out about mine.
304
00:16:50,261 --> 00:16:51,380
Lillian?
305
00:16:52,340 --> 00:16:53,500
Lillian?
306
00:16:53,581 --> 00:16:54,620
Hello, love.
307
00:16:56,740 --> 00:16:58,061
I thought I'd pop round.
308
00:16:58,141 --> 00:17:00,460
Look, I'm sorry
I flew off the handle a bit earlier.
309
00:17:00,541 --> 00:17:02,941
If anyone's apologising, it's me.
310
00:17:03,021 --> 00:17:06,541
Don't get me sleep,
I'm like a bear with a sore arse.
311
00:17:06,620 --> 00:17:09,380
-What are you doing?
-Catching up on some domestics.
312
00:17:09,461 --> 00:17:11,380
It's like a Chinese laundry in here
with the girls.
313
00:17:11,461 --> 00:17:14,061
Thanks, Victor, love.
See you next week, all right.
314
00:17:16,781 --> 00:17:19,301
These girls aren't really your nieces,
are they, Lillian?
315
00:17:19,380 --> 00:17:22,821
Not by blood,
but they like to call me "Auntie."
316
00:17:23,940 --> 00:17:27,541
They've had their problems, bless 'em,
living on the street as such,
317
00:17:27,620 --> 00:17:28,660
D-R-U-G-S.
318
00:17:28,741 --> 00:17:31,101
But I'm looking after them now.
319
00:17:31,900 --> 00:17:33,341
Ta-ra, Mike!
[kisses]
320
00:17:38,501 --> 00:17:39,301
Right.
321
00:17:42,501 --> 00:17:44,541
This can't be right, it's Lillian's house.
322
00:17:44,621 --> 00:17:47,301
We've got a nosy neighbour
keeping a log, taking photographs.
323
00:17:47,381 --> 00:17:48,940
Seventeen men in 24 hours.
324
00:17:49,021 --> 00:17:50,301
Who'd have thought it?
325
00:17:50,381 --> 00:17:51,741
Madam Sin.
326
00:17:51,821 --> 00:17:53,261
It's a competitive market these days,
327
00:17:53,341 --> 00:17:56,021
with the Eastern European girls
offering more for less.
328
00:17:56,981 --> 00:17:57,981
[Carrie]
We'll have to raid her.
329
00:17:58,061 --> 00:18:00,581
-No!
-We've got no choice.
330
00:18:02,660 --> 00:18:04,981
Don't see how we have to shift,
it's our house.
331
00:18:05,061 --> 00:18:06,900
[Debbie]
'Cos they need privacy to talk.
332
00:18:06,981 --> 00:18:10,381
The bedroom probably isn't
the most appropriate venue, considering.
333
00:18:12,301 --> 00:18:13,741
You an' all, Monica.
334
00:18:13,821 --> 00:18:16,101
I thought you might need a mature head.
335
00:18:16,180 --> 00:18:17,821
If you know any,
be sure and let us know.
336
00:18:19,101 --> 00:18:21,141
Frank, I think you should hear this.
337
00:18:21,221 --> 00:18:22,861
No, no, no!
338
00:18:22,940 --> 00:18:25,741
It's all just tomorrow's chip paper.
339
00:18:25,821 --> 00:18:28,141
I'd better go and see
what's bothering your dad.
340
00:18:30,180 --> 00:18:32,261
I thought your dad died in Bosnia.
341
00:18:40,180 --> 00:18:42,261
Oh...
342
00:18:42,341 --> 00:18:44,180
Frank? What are you looking for?
343
00:18:44,261 --> 00:18:46,660
Wedding photograph.
344
00:18:46,741 --> 00:18:49,180
There. There, see, wedding day.
345
00:18:49,261 --> 00:18:52,221
I was there, I made an impact
on that day, didn't I?
346
00:18:52,301 --> 00:18:55,900
Mmm, but you were unconscious
in that one so we had to prop you up.
347
00:18:58,741 --> 00:19:03,940
Fiona, birth of my first-born,
that has to count, ain't it?
348
00:19:04,021 --> 00:19:05,461
Mmm, except you're not in that one,
349
00:19:05,541 --> 00:19:07,581
'cos you disappeared
to wet the baby's head...
350
00:19:07,660 --> 00:19:09,341
for four days.
351
00:19:09,420 --> 00:19:11,461
Oh, fucking hell.
352
00:19:13,581 --> 00:19:17,981
Mon, Mon, I need you to tell me,
have I been a good man?
353
00:19:18,061 --> 00:19:19,420
You know, made a contribution?
354
00:19:19,501 --> 00:19:20,581
Of course you have, love.
355
00:19:20,660 --> 00:19:22,420
Well, how? Show me evidence.
356
00:19:24,861 --> 00:19:26,700
Look, what's brought all this on?
357
00:19:26,781 --> 00:19:28,141
I'm dying, Mon.
358
00:19:34,741 --> 00:19:36,700
I took a piss on a generator...
359
00:19:38,700 --> 00:19:40,301
and me cock got burnt,
360
00:19:40,381 --> 00:19:43,301
and I went to hospital,
and... and... and...
361
00:19:43,381 --> 00:19:44,420
[sobs]
362
00:19:44,501 --> 00:19:48,261
...and they said I've got...
363
00:19:48,341 --> 00:19:50,261
stenography of the heart.
364
00:19:50,341 --> 00:19:53,660
All right, all right.
Come on, calm down.
365
00:19:54,501 --> 00:19:56,501
Calm down!
366
00:19:56,581 --> 00:20:00,261
[sobs quietly]
367
00:20:00,341 --> 00:20:01,981
Tell me all about it.
368
00:20:02,061 --> 00:20:05,381
We have an open relationship.
369
00:20:05,461 --> 00:20:09,420
He can see other people,
and so can I.
370
00:20:09,501 --> 00:20:13,141
Cardinal rule is,
you don't get involved.
371
00:20:13,221 --> 00:20:15,940
So, I was just a fling, was I?
372
00:20:16,021 --> 00:20:18,381
What happened
to going travelling together,
373
00:20:18,461 --> 00:20:20,781
and, "Do you believe in soul mates"?
374
00:20:20,861 --> 00:20:25,501
Is no-one in this fucking world
who they appear to be?!
375
00:20:25,581 --> 00:20:27,940
I was woken up at 5:30 this morning
376
00:20:28,021 --> 00:20:30,741
by the police arresting my mum and dad.
377
00:20:30,821 --> 00:20:34,261
They've been running
a time-share scam in Turkey.
378
00:20:34,341 --> 00:20:38,021
Have you any idea what it's like
to have criminals for parents?
379
00:20:39,021 --> 00:20:41,741
I thought at least you were there for me.
380
00:20:45,061 --> 00:20:49,940
She said... She said I'll be lucky
to make it beyond the weekend.
381
00:20:50,021 --> 00:20:54,021
Oh, don't be silly,
you're just confused.
382
00:20:54,101 --> 00:20:56,381
You had a lot to drink last night,
that's all.
383
00:20:56,461 --> 00:20:58,700
No! Mon, my head
has never been clearer.
384
00:21:00,861 --> 00:21:06,141
And I need to know.
I mean, what is my legacy?
385
00:21:11,821 --> 00:21:12,821
Well...
386
00:21:16,061 --> 00:21:19,221
Well, I suppose you could say, um...
387
00:21:21,660 --> 00:21:22,821
Go on!
388
00:21:23,501 --> 00:21:26,180
Jesus, Frank, it's not easy.
389
00:21:26,261 --> 00:21:27,781
You're an alcoholic.
390
00:21:27,861 --> 00:21:29,781
You've never put a penny
in the family pot.
391
00:21:29,861 --> 00:21:32,341
You've as much chance
of being elected Prime Minister
392
00:21:32,420 --> 00:21:35,741
as naming any
of your eight children's birthdays.
393
00:21:37,501 --> 00:21:40,861
Well, thank you very fucking much
for your support!
394
00:21:40,940 --> 00:21:43,660
Oh, Frank, don't spit the dummy out.
395
00:21:43,741 --> 00:21:45,621
Nobody looks to you for achievements,
396
00:21:45,700 --> 00:21:47,581
you're not
an achievement kind of a bloke!
397
00:21:50,981 --> 00:21:53,101
So, who made heaven and earth, then?
398
00:21:53,180 --> 00:21:55,061
Well, for a start, there is no heaven.
399
00:21:55,141 --> 00:21:57,981
And the earth started with the Big Bang.
400
00:21:58,061 --> 00:22:01,420
So, what happens when you die,
smartarse?
401
00:22:01,501 --> 00:22:04,180
Nothing, you just die.
402
00:22:04,261 --> 00:22:09,940
Remember, "Man, thou art dust,
and into dust thou shalt return."
403
00:22:10,021 --> 00:22:12,981
-Dad, tell her, sure there's a God.
-What?
404
00:22:13,061 --> 00:22:16,141
God. Does He, She or It exist?
405
00:22:16,221 --> 00:22:19,741
Carl wants to know if divine intervention
can help him get his end away.
406
00:22:23,700 --> 00:22:26,781
In the dark of night,
407
00:22:26,861 --> 00:22:29,741
every atheist half-believes, Debs.
408
00:22:32,021 --> 00:22:36,621
So if I come back to haunt you,
you'll know for sure.
409
00:22:42,420 --> 00:22:44,221
What kind of answer's that?
410
00:22:44,301 --> 00:22:46,741
I knew nothing about you,
411
00:22:46,821 --> 00:22:48,700
or the little girl.
412
00:22:50,221 --> 00:22:52,341
As far as I was aware,
he was an orphan,
413
00:22:52,420 --> 00:22:54,781
who brought himself up
from the age of 14.
414
00:22:57,660 --> 00:23:00,180
It was a white lie that got out of hand.
415
00:23:01,621 --> 00:23:02,981
It wasn't meant to go this far.
416
00:23:03,061 --> 00:23:04,781
What wasn't?
The lie, or our relationship?
417
00:23:04,861 --> 00:23:05,861
Both.
418
00:23:08,741 --> 00:23:12,261
I think you're stretching it a bit
to call it a relationship.
419
00:23:12,341 --> 00:23:16,101
No, no, no, no, no!
420
00:23:20,900 --> 00:23:22,741
Don't stop on my account.
421
00:23:27,501 --> 00:23:29,700
It's like being a prisoner
in your own home!
422
00:23:32,700 --> 00:23:33,940
[sighs heavily]
423
00:23:36,341 --> 00:23:38,180
It seems you've got a choice to make.
424
00:23:44,180 --> 00:23:45,541
Oh, well, I'll help.
425
00:23:45,621 --> 00:23:49,101
'Cos I can't kick the dust of this place
off my shoes quick enough.
426
00:23:49,180 --> 00:23:50,061
I'm having a brew.
427
00:23:50,141 --> 00:23:51,541
I'm really sorry...
428
00:24:05,581 --> 00:24:06,981
What's your happiest memory of me?
429
00:24:07,061 --> 00:24:09,021
Bloody hell, Dad, what you lurking for?
430
00:24:09,101 --> 00:24:13,141
Just tell me, daughter to father,
best birthday party?
431
00:24:13,221 --> 00:24:15,061
Favourite day out?
432
00:24:15,141 --> 00:24:18,660
I never had a birthday party,
and you were always wasted on days...
433
00:24:18,741 --> 00:24:21,741
-Well, there was that time when...
-Yeah, go on.
434
00:24:21,821 --> 00:24:24,221
When we went to court
to see you being bound over.
435
00:24:24,301 --> 00:24:26,741
I wanted to be a lawyer
for ages after that.
436
00:24:28,021 --> 00:24:29,221
And that's it?
437
00:24:29,301 --> 00:24:32,420
Well... I could make something up,
if you want.
438
00:24:34,301 --> 00:24:35,541
Et tu, Debbie?
439
00:24:37,501 --> 00:24:38,861
Et tu?
440
00:24:43,981 --> 00:24:45,341
You ate two what?
441
00:24:53,621 --> 00:24:54,821
Dad?
442
00:25:04,741 --> 00:25:05,541
All right?
443
00:25:08,141 --> 00:25:09,581
Did I hurt you?
444
00:25:09,660 --> 00:25:10,581
No.
445
00:25:11,861 --> 00:25:14,621
Yeah. It stings like fuck.
446
00:25:14,700 --> 00:25:16,180
So does my wrist.
447
00:25:17,981 --> 00:25:20,460
What's your plan?
448
00:25:20,541 --> 00:25:21,741
Haven't got one.
449
00:25:21,821 --> 00:25:24,021
Look, I'm really sorry about...
450
00:25:24,101 --> 00:25:28,541
I don't care about the stupid lies
you've told about your family.
451
00:25:28,621 --> 00:25:30,581
I just need to know one thing.
452
00:25:32,420 --> 00:25:35,101
Stuff you said when it was
just you and me,
453
00:25:35,180 --> 00:25:36,581
the pillow talk. Did you mean it?
454
00:25:36,660 --> 00:25:38,061
Of course I did.
455
00:25:38,141 --> 00:25:40,621
Then I don't understand.
456
00:25:40,700 --> 00:25:42,180
Neither do I.
457
00:25:42,261 --> 00:25:44,141
I'll sort it out when I get back
to Nottingham, yeah?
458
00:25:44,220 --> 00:25:47,141
No, Phil, it's not good enough.
459
00:25:48,101 --> 00:25:49,460
I have to go to work.
460
00:25:49,541 --> 00:25:53,341
-What?
-I've got a shift at the pub.
461
00:25:53,420 --> 00:25:54,940
I can't just not go.
462
00:25:57,301 --> 00:25:59,101
I'll see you at uni.
463
00:26:05,381 --> 00:26:07,381
Nobody would give
a good account of you.
464
00:26:07,460 --> 00:26:09,900
If anything, you've had a negative impact.
465
00:26:09,981 --> 00:26:11,821
[mokingly] "If anything,
you've had a negative impact."
466
00:26:11,900 --> 00:26:12,781
What you doing?
467
00:26:15,180 --> 00:26:16,301
What you doing?
468
00:26:16,381 --> 00:26:18,460
-Looking for evidence.
-Evidence of what?
469
00:26:18,541 --> 00:26:21,940
Of why you're here,
and why you're haunting me,
470
00:26:22,021 --> 00:26:24,861
like Casper the fucking
less than friendly previous self.
471
00:26:24,940 --> 00:26:26,061
You know why.
472
00:26:26,141 --> 00:26:28,261
No, I do not.
473
00:26:30,700 --> 00:26:33,900
All right, so I've contributed
slightly less than Einstein
474
00:26:33,981 --> 00:26:37,541
and slightly more than Fred West
to the human condition, so what?
475
00:26:37,621 --> 00:26:40,021
Who the fuck are you to criticise?
476
00:26:41,741 --> 00:26:44,141
Oh!
477
00:26:48,220 --> 00:26:49,781
See! Hey?
478
00:26:50,420 --> 00:26:51,900
I was hardly a little angel, was I?
479
00:26:51,981 --> 00:26:55,220
Already well acquainted with Lady Palm
and her five fucking sisters.
480
00:26:55,301 --> 00:26:57,981
So what, I never said I was an angel.
481
00:27:01,900 --> 00:27:03,301
Then what do you want?
482
00:27:04,101 --> 00:27:06,220
What else happened
when you were 12?
483
00:27:06,301 --> 00:27:08,861
I don't know.
484
00:27:10,541 --> 00:27:12,501
Malcolm Allison became City manager.
485
00:27:12,581 --> 00:27:15,101
Rodney Marsh shagged a model.
486
00:27:15,180 --> 00:27:19,141
-Closer to home.
-I don't know.
487
00:27:23,741 --> 00:27:25,861
Well, they cancelled my birthday
because...
488
00:27:34,061 --> 00:27:35,341
Mum died.
489
00:27:37,061 --> 00:27:39,781
You promised you'd make her proud.
490
00:27:47,821 --> 00:27:50,741
How could I make her proud
with him as me old man?
491
00:27:52,141 --> 00:27:53,660
You'll see her soon enough.
492
00:27:54,741 --> 00:27:57,501
Tell her yourself
about the man you became.
493
00:27:57,581 --> 00:28:00,621
That is, if you make it up there.
494
00:28:01,821 --> 00:28:03,061
What, heaven?
495
00:28:04,741 --> 00:28:06,781
Confession's good for the soul,
496
00:28:06,861 --> 00:28:09,621
especially if the Day of Judgement
is fast approaching.
497
00:28:12,061 --> 00:28:14,700
But... But I can't go to chapel.
I'm barred.
498
00:28:14,781 --> 00:28:16,301
Who needs a priest?
499
00:28:16,381 --> 00:28:19,821
With a soul as black as yours,
you'd better get started.
500
00:28:19,900 --> 00:28:20,861
And remember...
501
00:28:20,940 --> 00:28:24,261
[child Frank and adult voices]
God sees everything, Frank.
502
00:28:28,381 --> 00:28:29,940
Hello, Dennis?
503
00:28:30,021 --> 00:28:32,261
Listen, remember that party,
504
00:28:32,341 --> 00:28:35,741
when somebody put the chip pan on
and the house burnt down?
505
00:28:35,821 --> 00:28:38,501
Right. Anyhow, it was me.
506
00:28:38,581 --> 00:28:41,220
Hello, is that Emma?
Hi, it's Frank Gallagher here.
507
00:28:41,301 --> 00:28:44,420
It was me. Remember that party,
when you shagged that builder,
508
00:28:44,501 --> 00:28:47,501
and your old fella cottoned on
and turfed you out?
509
00:28:47,581 --> 00:28:48,501
Rickets?
510
00:28:48,581 --> 00:28:49,821
Hi, it's Frank Gallagher here.
511
00:28:49,900 --> 00:28:52,061
It was me. It was me. It was me.
512
00:28:52,141 --> 00:28:56,261
Yeah. Yes, I know I'm a cunt,
but I just thought you should know.
513
00:28:56,341 --> 00:28:59,101
Hello, Dennis? Frank again.
I forgot to say...
514
00:28:59,180 --> 00:29:00,220
[steps approaching]
515
00:29:03,021 --> 00:29:07,541
-Who were you talking to?
-Nobody, it was the wrong number.
516
00:29:07,621 --> 00:29:09,621
Oh, look at you. You're all sweaty.
517
00:29:09,700 --> 00:29:11,821
No, I haven't got time for this, Mon.
518
00:29:12,700 --> 00:29:13,660
Isn't that Lip's?
519
00:29:13,741 --> 00:29:16,621
Yeah, well, he'll get it back soon enough.
520
00:29:16,700 --> 00:29:18,021
Frank?
521
00:29:19,980 --> 00:29:21,741
I probably didn't tell you enough,
Monica,
522
00:29:23,021 --> 00:29:24,660
but I love you.
523
00:29:33,861 --> 00:29:37,861
-Hey.
-Hey.
524
00:29:37,940 --> 00:29:40,501
So, where's this pub
your brother's working at?
525
00:29:41,700 --> 00:29:44,141
Just over there.
526
00:29:44,220 --> 00:29:45,541
So, are you gonna buy me a drink then?
527
00:29:48,980 --> 00:29:50,420
I'll give you the money.
528
00:29:58,460 --> 00:30:00,141
Come on, Mrs Maguire.
529
00:30:00,220 --> 00:30:03,420
I am claiming my conjugal rights.
530
00:30:03,501 --> 00:30:04,741
I'm busy.
531
00:30:04,821 --> 00:30:07,501
Oh, come on, it doesn't have to be
a Doctor Zhivago or anything.
532
00:30:07,581 --> 00:30:09,061
A quickie'll do.
533
00:30:10,301 --> 00:30:12,420
Well, that's tempting.
534
00:30:12,501 --> 00:30:14,420
Meet you upstairs in five.
535
00:30:24,700 --> 00:30:26,700
You're having a fucking laugh!
536
00:30:29,861 --> 00:30:31,940
Karen?
537
00:30:32,021 --> 00:30:33,141
Can I have a word?
538
00:30:37,180 --> 00:30:39,301
Are you mental?
539
00:30:39,381 --> 00:30:41,541
Open relationships are never equal!
540
00:30:41,621 --> 00:30:42,980
What was the alternative?
541
00:30:43,061 --> 00:30:45,861
Him tripping over himself, trying
to remember which lie he's told?
542
00:30:47,900 --> 00:30:48,781
When he goes back to uni,
543
00:30:48,861 --> 00:30:51,660
if it's not this one,
it'll be somebody else.
544
00:30:51,741 --> 00:30:53,700
We're holding him back.
545
00:30:55,621 --> 00:30:58,180
I just hope you've been getting some
to even out the score.
546
00:31:01,621 --> 00:31:03,301
Fucking annoying thing is...
547
00:31:05,021 --> 00:31:06,541
I love him, Karen.
548
00:31:07,700 --> 00:31:08,741
Hey!
549
00:31:26,101 --> 00:31:29,821
By the time you view this,
I will be dead.
550
00:31:37,501 --> 00:31:39,141
I've led a full life...
551
00:31:39,220 --> 00:31:42,301
or perhaps a fool's life,
I'll let history be the judge.
552
00:31:44,101 --> 00:31:47,501
But I leave you the proud father of six...
553
00:31:47,581 --> 00:31:49,381
The proud father of eight.
554
00:31:51,180 --> 00:31:52,061
So...
555
00:31:56,541 --> 00:32:01,180
Lip, you were a gobby little shite,
always had too much to say for yourself.
556
00:32:01,261 --> 00:32:03,740
So you should know
that I've had a lickle piss
557
00:32:03,821 --> 00:32:07,700
in every bottle of pop
you've left in the fridge since 1997.
558
00:32:08,821 --> 00:32:10,700
[coughs] Ian...
559
00:32:12,460 --> 00:32:14,420
[mobile rings]
560
00:32:20,141 --> 00:32:21,381
Hello?
561
00:32:22,261 --> 00:32:23,420
Speaking.
562
00:32:24,660 --> 00:32:26,061
He's not here at the moment.
563
00:32:26,141 --> 00:32:28,700
Between the ages of three and four,
564
00:32:28,781 --> 00:32:31,781
I regularly gave Liam
a couple of downers,
565
00:32:31,861 --> 00:32:33,940
so he would shut the fuck up.
566
00:32:34,021 --> 00:32:36,501
I dropped Carl on his head
when he was a baby.
567
00:32:36,581 --> 00:32:39,581
And then they fucking haul you in
for indecent exposure.
568
00:32:39,660 --> 00:32:41,301
I still don't see
what's indecent about it,
569
00:32:41,381 --> 00:32:43,980
'cos if they all had Alzheimer's,
how would they know any different?
570
00:32:44,061 --> 00:32:46,541
Listen, if there's something wrong
with him, you better fucking tell...
571
00:32:46,621 --> 00:32:49,821
And finally, something
I've always guarded with my life.
572
00:32:51,460 --> 00:32:53,940
-Where you going?
-I need to find your dad.
573
00:32:56,220 --> 00:32:57,261
That's it.
574
00:32:59,021 --> 00:33:00,740
The end.
575
00:33:03,220 --> 00:33:04,501
How did I wind up here?
576
00:33:05,420 --> 00:33:07,101
You were always gonna wind up here.
577
00:33:08,220 --> 00:33:10,821
Christ! I've never been before.
578
00:33:10,900 --> 00:33:14,581
-He wouldn't let me go to her funeral.
-I know.
579
00:33:15,261 --> 00:33:16,501
Which one is it?
580
00:33:16,581 --> 00:33:18,381
You'll find it.
581
00:33:22,220 --> 00:33:24,220
[music plays]
582
00:33:30,021 --> 00:33:32,980
♪Heaven♪
583
00:33:33,061 --> 00:33:36,821
♪Must be missing an angel♪
584
00:33:36,900 --> 00:33:39,420
♪Missing one angel, child♪
585
00:33:39,501 --> 00:33:43,021
♪'Cos you're here with me right now♪
586
00:33:43,101 --> 00:33:46,261
And remember, folks,
all proceeds go to Cancer Research.
587
00:33:46,341 --> 00:33:48,301
Wish you had it, you tosser.
588
00:33:48,381 --> 00:33:49,740
[music restarts]
589
00:33:55,740 --> 00:33:57,061
Fancy a shag?
590
00:33:58,301 --> 00:33:59,940
♪Heaven♪
591
00:34:01,301 --> 00:34:04,061
♪Must be missing an angel♪
592
00:34:05,180 --> 00:34:07,861
♪Missing one angel, child♪
593
00:34:07,940 --> 00:34:09,621
♪'Cos you're here with me right now♪
594
00:34:09,700 --> 00:34:11,501
Have you been crying?
595
00:34:11,581 --> 00:34:13,180
Have I fuck!
596
00:34:13,260 --> 00:34:14,340
Who was it, Mandy?
597
00:34:14,421 --> 00:34:16,820
-What?
-The bloke you shagged.
598
00:34:16,901 --> 00:34:19,141
Somebody in here?
599
00:34:19,220 --> 00:34:21,621
It's only fair, you know about mine.
600
00:34:21,700 --> 00:34:23,860
You're such a prick.
601
00:34:23,941 --> 00:34:25,461
-All right, Mandy.
-Hiya.
602
00:34:27,780 --> 00:34:29,220
Maybe it was him.
603
00:34:29,300 --> 00:34:30,421
He's fit.
604
00:34:30,501 --> 00:34:32,461
Hung like a donkey, by all accounts.
605
00:34:32,541 --> 00:34:33,780
Fuck you!
606
00:34:37,061 --> 00:34:39,501
It's the blokes who are the criminals.
607
00:34:39,581 --> 00:34:42,141
Girls on the game, they've got no choice.
608
00:34:42,220 --> 00:34:44,141
But the men... Scum.
609
00:34:44,220 --> 00:34:47,780
I wonder why they call it "the game"?
610
00:34:47,860 --> 00:34:49,780
I should know. I've been there.
611
00:34:50,901 --> 00:34:54,700
-Somebody paid you for sex?
-It's all about self-esteem.
612
00:34:54,780 --> 00:34:58,381
Girls need a helping hand,
not prosecution.
613
00:34:59,061 --> 00:35:01,061
Somebody paid you for sex?
614
00:35:13,141 --> 00:35:14,421
I'm sorry.
615
00:35:22,541 --> 00:35:24,381
Do you think that's entirely appropriate?
616
00:35:24,461 --> 00:35:25,901
Oh, get off your high horse!
617
00:35:27,300 --> 00:35:31,621
Some of the fondest memories I have of her
is her with an ale in her hand.
618
00:35:31,701 --> 00:35:34,261
I think she would have approved.
619
00:35:38,501 --> 00:35:40,621
Need to find an envelope for this.
620
00:35:47,421 --> 00:35:52,581
♪Zoom!
Just one look, and my heart went boom♪
621
00:35:52,661 --> 00:35:55,261
♪Suddenly, we were on the...♪
622
00:35:55,340 --> 00:35:56,820
A pint and two Es.
623
00:36:02,221 --> 00:36:04,820
-There you go, Frank.
-I'll get those.
624
00:36:06,101 --> 00:36:09,820
Oh darling,
I've been looking for you everywhere.
625
00:36:09,901 --> 00:36:13,461
The hospital phoned,
and I'm sorry I didn't believe you.
626
00:36:13,541 --> 00:36:16,421
I'm so sorry! [crying]
627
00:36:18,021 --> 00:36:22,421
You can't leave me, Frank.
I don't know what I'll do without you.
628
00:36:25,701 --> 00:36:27,621
Oh, for fuck's sake, get it over with.
629
00:36:27,701 --> 00:36:30,621
-Well, if you're sure...
-Go!
630
00:36:35,661 --> 00:36:36,701
What's up with her now?
631
00:36:36,780 --> 00:36:40,741
[Monica crying]
632
00:36:40,820 --> 00:36:43,340
[Frank] Love will find a way.
633
00:36:43,421 --> 00:36:45,340
Don't worry.
634
00:36:45,421 --> 00:36:47,021
Where's my bag?
635
00:36:47,941 --> 00:36:50,501
-Where's my bag?!
-What are you talking about?
636
00:36:50,581 --> 00:36:52,221
My bag! It was...
637
00:36:52,300 --> 00:36:53,621
It was right there.
638
00:36:53,701 --> 00:36:55,741
How could anyone have nicked it?
It must have weighed a tonne!
639
00:36:55,820 --> 00:36:57,541
You left your bag by the door?
640
00:36:57,621 --> 00:37:01,621
Take it easy, it's only stuff.
641
00:37:02,860 --> 00:37:04,860
I don't think this is a good idea.
642
00:37:06,061 --> 00:37:07,501
Listen.
643
00:37:08,461 --> 00:37:10,981
I've had the shittiest day of my life.
644
00:37:11,061 --> 00:37:12,581
It doesn't matter.
645
00:37:12,661 --> 00:37:13,941
What's important is this.
646
00:37:14,021 --> 00:37:17,061
I don't care what lies you told, OK?
I love you.
647
00:37:17,141 --> 00:37:18,701
It's past time you left.
648
00:37:18,780 --> 00:37:21,300
No, I want you to hear this.
649
00:37:21,380 --> 00:37:23,661
I want Phil to come back with me.
650
00:37:23,741 --> 00:37:25,701
He doesn't belong here.
651
00:37:25,780 --> 00:37:26,860
Phil?
652
00:37:27,820 --> 00:37:29,780
I'm staying here.
653
00:37:29,860 --> 00:37:32,941
Well, you don't have to decide now.
654
00:37:33,021 --> 00:37:34,300
I thought I should be up front.
655
00:37:34,380 --> 00:37:36,061
Very noble.
656
00:37:36,141 --> 00:37:37,901
We need to be friends.
657
00:37:38,941 --> 00:37:40,061
If this works out,
658
00:37:40,141 --> 00:37:43,141
I could be partly responsible
for bringing up your daughter.
659
00:37:48,261 --> 00:37:49,300
Ah!
660
00:37:49,380 --> 00:37:50,741
Mandy!
661
00:37:50,820 --> 00:37:52,461
My ear!
662
00:37:52,541 --> 00:37:54,181
She bit my ear!
663
00:37:54,261 --> 00:37:56,021
Do what you want with him,
you fucking bitch,
664
00:37:56,101 --> 00:37:58,741
but don't you dare
bring my daughter into this!
665
00:38:00,061 --> 00:38:01,300
-Mandy!
-Bitch!
666
00:38:01,380 --> 00:38:03,101
Mandy, please! Don't!
667
00:38:03,181 --> 00:38:04,181
Go on, Mandy!
668
00:38:05,021 --> 00:38:06,101
Get it to her!
669
00:38:09,901 --> 00:38:11,541
You fucking what?
670
00:38:14,101 --> 00:38:15,141
What you looking at?
671
00:38:23,780 --> 00:38:24,981
Get off me, Shane!
672
00:38:30,221 --> 00:38:32,221
[laughs]
673
00:38:33,261 --> 00:38:34,621
Come on, where are you,
you little bastard?
674
00:38:35,941 --> 00:38:37,981
Come on, show yourself!
675
00:38:38,621 --> 00:38:39,621
Oi!
676
00:38:43,181 --> 00:38:45,300
What's more alive than this, eh?
677
00:38:52,340 --> 00:38:54,941
Gallaghers,
fighting for the family honour!
678
00:38:56,461 --> 00:38:59,380
Hey, hey! Hey, hey!
679
00:38:59,461 --> 00:39:01,300
This is my legacy!
680
00:39:01,380 --> 00:39:04,421
You've got your hands on my tits!
681
00:39:04,501 --> 00:39:06,461
I know.
682
00:39:06,541 --> 00:39:08,820
And they all come from here!
683
00:39:08,901 --> 00:39:10,300
Oh, me cock!
684
00:39:22,541 --> 00:39:24,101
Party!
685
00:39:33,340 --> 00:39:34,181
Fucking hell!
686
00:39:34,261 --> 00:39:37,061
I haven't even taken any poppers,
and I can hear all sorts of shit.
687
00:39:37,141 --> 00:39:38,541
Me an' all!
688
00:39:43,581 --> 00:39:45,380
Oh, fuck! Oh!
689
00:39:48,141 --> 00:39:51,581
[birds singing]
690
00:39:56,101 --> 00:39:57,380
Oh.
691
00:40:00,340 --> 00:40:02,421
Fucking hell.
692
00:40:19,340 --> 00:40:20,461
[Frank's voice]
I've got no shadow.
693
00:40:20,541 --> 00:40:21,780
[child Frank]
That's 'cos you're dead.
694
00:40:23,261 --> 00:40:25,541
You've got no physical form.
695
00:40:25,621 --> 00:40:26,741
What?
696
00:40:26,820 --> 00:40:28,261
You died last night.
697
00:40:32,981 --> 00:40:34,061
But...
698
00:40:36,741 --> 00:40:38,101
I feel normal.
699
00:40:41,021 --> 00:40:43,901
So do I. Don't mean I'm real.
700
00:40:47,661 --> 00:40:49,501
Oh, God.
701
00:40:49,581 --> 00:40:52,780
So, what happens now?
702
00:40:52,860 --> 00:40:57,661
How do I know if it's the Pearly Gates,
or the eternal damnation?
703
00:40:57,741 --> 00:41:00,021
How should I know? I haven't died yet.
704
00:41:00,101 --> 00:41:03,181
I'm just a figment of your imagination.
705
00:41:03,261 --> 00:41:05,261
-Who's that?
-Big Dennis.
706
00:41:05,340 --> 00:41:06,141
Hello, Dennis.
707
00:41:06,221 --> 00:41:10,181
Torchy, we called him, after the fire.
708
00:41:10,261 --> 00:41:12,181
Thank fuck he can't see me.
709
00:41:12,261 --> 00:41:13,340
[grunts]
710
00:41:16,461 --> 00:41:19,541
-You said I had no physical form.
-What do I know?
711
00:41:20,300 --> 00:41:23,181
Who the fuck are you talking to?
712
00:41:23,261 --> 00:41:27,300
[Carl]
Oh, oh, fuck.
713
00:41:28,780 --> 00:41:30,820
Told yer. There is a God!
714
00:41:34,300 --> 00:41:35,621
Is that it?
715
00:41:39,541 --> 00:41:41,780
Don't be silly.
716
00:41:41,860 --> 00:41:43,621
You should be ashamed of yourself.
717
00:41:43,701 --> 00:41:45,261
You're exploiting women.
718
00:41:45,340 --> 00:41:47,541
They'd be on the streets otherwise.
719
00:41:47,621 --> 00:41:48,860
What's this?
720
00:41:48,941 --> 00:41:50,141
It's for running the cards through.
721
00:41:50,221 --> 00:41:53,741
Yvonne sold it me wi' carbon, 100 quid.
I'm rubbish with cash.
722
00:41:53,820 --> 00:41:55,221
It's all Chip and PIN these days,
Lillian.
723
00:41:55,300 --> 00:41:56,661
Banks don't use this any more.
724
00:41:56,741 --> 00:41:59,021
So, you haven't made one penny profit.
725
00:41:59,101 --> 00:42:00,780
Which also means
she hasn't committed a crime.
726
00:42:00,860 --> 00:42:02,061
What?!
727
00:42:02,141 --> 00:42:03,181
What about the other evidence?
728
00:42:03,261 --> 00:42:05,300
What about the neighbours' photos,
the log?
729
00:42:05,380 --> 00:42:07,501
Without any proof to back it up,
it's just hearsay.
730
00:42:07,581 --> 00:42:12,141
[girls laughing]
731
00:42:12,221 --> 00:42:14,581
Result being, though,
you lot haven't made no money.
732
00:42:27,581 --> 00:42:29,181
[Mandy]
How are you feeling?
733
00:42:33,661 --> 00:42:34,941
I don't know.
734
00:42:37,421 --> 00:42:38,621
Mandy, listen.
735
00:42:41,661 --> 00:42:43,101
I'm so sorry.
736
00:42:44,300 --> 00:42:45,780
I lost sight.
737
00:42:47,021 --> 00:42:49,820
Uni's full of kids wi' no worries,
738
00:42:49,901 --> 00:42:51,380
free to do whatever they want,
739
00:42:52,661 --> 00:42:54,780
and I forgot what's important.
740
00:42:56,221 --> 00:42:58,141
You and Katie are what's important.
741
00:42:59,101 --> 00:43:01,701
We'll knock the open relationship
on the head.
742
00:43:01,780 --> 00:43:04,581
I'm gonna quit uni
and get a job, stay here.
743
00:43:04,661 --> 00:43:05,780
Will you fuck!
744
00:43:05,860 --> 00:43:08,021
You'll go back.
745
00:43:08,101 --> 00:43:10,541
I'm not having you use me
as an excuse for failing.
746
00:43:17,141 --> 00:43:19,701
-You know I love you, don't you?
-Of course I do.
747
00:43:20,981 --> 00:43:22,661
Good.
748
00:43:24,461 --> 00:43:26,541
'Cos that's why we're finished.
749
00:43:26,621 --> 00:43:27,981
No, Mandy,
750
00:43:28,061 --> 00:43:29,421
I couldn't give a toss about Alex.
751
00:43:29,501 --> 00:43:33,701
I know that, but that's not the point.
If it's not her, it'll be somebody else.
752
00:43:33,780 --> 00:43:35,181
No, it won't, I promise.
753
00:43:35,261 --> 00:43:38,941
It will, Lip. I know for a fact.
754
00:43:39,021 --> 00:43:41,581
You could have slept with 20 girls
over that three months,
755
00:43:41,661 --> 00:43:44,261
but you didn't, you stuck with one.
756
00:43:44,340 --> 00:43:48,061
-I was stupid.
-Just listen to me.
757
00:43:48,141 --> 00:43:51,141
It's not about jealousy or blame,
758
00:43:52,380 --> 00:43:55,661
it's about what you want.
759
00:43:56,380 --> 00:43:57,941
And in your fantasy...
760
00:44:00,141 --> 00:44:02,780
there is no me,
and there's no Katie.
761
00:44:02,860 --> 00:44:03,780
That's not true.
762
00:44:03,860 --> 00:44:05,941
How many people at uni
know you've got a daughter?
763
00:44:10,741 --> 00:44:12,741
Your life's out there now.
764
00:44:13,860 --> 00:44:15,181
Alex was right.
765
00:44:16,661 --> 00:44:18,501
You don't belong here any more.
766
00:44:25,380 --> 00:44:28,541
Go back to uni, till Easter.
767
00:44:31,221 --> 00:44:32,941
You can visit Katie then.
768
00:44:34,221 --> 00:44:36,141
She'll always be your daughter.
769
00:44:37,621 --> 00:44:38,900
You need to go.
770
00:44:38,981 --> 00:44:40,421
Mandy, please. Don't.
771
00:44:41,061 --> 00:44:42,541
Mandy, please.
772
00:44:42,621 --> 00:44:44,181
Mandy.
773
00:44:44,261 --> 00:44:45,900
Fuck's sake.
774
00:44:50,181 --> 00:44:51,380
Hiya, Mon.
775
00:44:51,461 --> 00:44:54,661
Have you any idea about the worry
that you have put me through
776
00:44:54,741 --> 00:44:56,340
these last 24 hours?
777
00:44:56,421 --> 00:44:57,981
-You're good to go.
-You?
778
00:44:58,061 --> 00:44:59,981
What about me?
779
00:45:00,061 --> 00:45:03,581
A death sentence, followed
by an unprovoked and savage assault.
780
00:45:03,661 --> 00:45:05,860
Well, I hope it's knocked
some sense into you.
781
00:45:08,261 --> 00:45:12,221
Wait... Just... No... The doctor...
The doctor said...
782
00:45:12,300 --> 00:45:14,900
There is nothing wrong
with your heart.
783
00:45:14,981 --> 00:45:17,261
They've been running tests all morning.
784
00:45:19,581 --> 00:45:22,461
-It's not... But they phoned you.
-My mistake.
785
00:45:22,541 --> 00:45:25,421
They weren't calling
about your dicky ticker.
786
00:45:25,501 --> 00:45:28,941
They were calling about your dicky cock!
787
00:45:29,021 --> 00:45:33,101
Cooling cream, to stop your little man
from going all scabby.
788
00:45:38,860 --> 00:45:41,661
Hey, aortic fucking stenosis!
789
00:45:41,741 --> 00:45:45,021
My heart is stronger
than Popeye in a spinach factory.
790
00:45:45,101 --> 00:45:47,261
What medical school did you go to?
791
00:45:47,340 --> 00:45:50,421
You are going to have a malpractice suit
so far up your...
792
00:45:50,501 --> 00:45:53,461
I'm not a doctor. I never said I was.
793
00:45:53,541 --> 00:45:54,820
What?!
794
00:45:54,900 --> 00:45:58,141
I came to see if you were all right,
and you just assumed.
795
00:46:00,261 --> 00:46:01,701
Bollocks.
796
00:46:02,941 --> 00:46:06,461
What about "Notify Family Afterwards"?
797
00:46:06,541 --> 00:46:10,141
As far as I know,
NFA means "No Fixed Abode."
798
00:46:10,221 --> 00:46:11,860
You were in such a state
when you came in,
799
00:46:11,941 --> 00:46:14,780
they could hardly get a name
out of you, let alone an address.
800
00:46:17,101 --> 00:46:18,820
Fuck!
801
00:46:18,900 --> 00:46:21,541
So, you know, what's your fucking game,
802
00:46:21,621 --> 00:46:24,661
hanging about hospitals trying to scare
the living shit out of everybody?
803
00:46:24,741 --> 00:46:25,900
"Waking the dead.
804
00:46:25,981 --> 00:46:27,541
If you see a bright light,
walk towards it."
805
00:46:27,621 --> 00:46:29,101
That was my husband
you were heckling.
806
00:46:29,181 --> 00:46:31,461
Why should I have shown you any courtesy?
807
00:46:31,541 --> 00:46:33,061
Well, there's a difference
between courtesy
808
00:46:33,141 --> 00:46:34,661
and telling a body
that they're gonna die.
809
00:46:34,741 --> 00:46:37,340
I was tending to my husband
when you woke up.
810
00:46:42,820 --> 00:46:44,261
So, what's wrong with him?
811
00:46:47,581 --> 00:46:50,181
He has aortic stenosis.
812
00:46:55,380 --> 00:46:57,061
So he's dying?
813
00:47:04,501 --> 00:47:05,661
All right, mate.
814
00:47:07,181 --> 00:47:08,300
Hey...
815
00:47:09,701 --> 00:47:11,981
I know exactly
what you're going through.
816
00:47:12,061 --> 00:47:16,541
I tell you,
there's fuck all to worry about. Yeah?
817
00:47:16,621 --> 00:47:18,981
[Frank] So what if I never peaked?
818
00:47:19,061 --> 00:47:21,780
I was here. I've lived.
819
00:47:23,860 --> 00:47:27,581
Am I a rogue and peasant slave?
A muddy-mettled rascal?
820
00:47:27,661 --> 00:47:30,780
Who gives a shit?
What did fucking Shakespeare know?
821
00:47:30,860 --> 00:47:33,900
He never even wrote
most of them plays.
822
00:47:33,981 --> 00:47:36,181
So what, if I'm not an astronaut,
823
00:47:36,261 --> 00:47:38,421
or a Prime Minister,
or a football player?
824
00:47:38,501 --> 00:47:41,141
I am Vernon Francis Gallagher.
825
00:47:41,221 --> 00:47:44,581
I came, I saw, I drank the fucking lot.
826
00:47:46,581 --> 00:47:48,981
-Easy.
-I don't think of you as fat.
827
00:47:49,061 --> 00:47:53,181
I can't believe you used
the fucking "F" word!
828
00:47:53,261 --> 00:47:54,101
Forgive us?
829
00:47:54,181 --> 00:47:58,101
I'll never be thin.
Never be desirable again.
830
00:47:58,181 --> 00:48:00,340
-What've you done?
-He's for you.
831
00:48:00,421 --> 00:48:01,900
Got to face what I am.
832
00:48:01,981 --> 00:48:04,461
I'm a fat fuck.
833
00:48:04,541 --> 00:48:07,501
I'm a fucking fat fucker.
834
00:48:07,581 --> 00:48:09,581
[music plays]
835
00:48:50,581 --> 00:48:54,181
[Frank] And finally, something
I've always guarded with me life,
836
00:48:54,261 --> 00:48:58,101
and, I hope, won't sully
your memory of me.
837
00:48:59,900 --> 00:49:04,900
Monica, at your 21st birthday party,
when you were passed out on the coats,
838
00:49:04,981 --> 00:49:08,581
I shagged your mother,
God rest her soul.
839
00:49:08,661 --> 00:49:11,581
I was wasted, but she wasn't, dirty cow.
840
00:49:11,661 --> 00:49:13,900
Anyhow, the upshot is,
841
00:49:13,981 --> 00:49:18,661
you know that surprise late baby
that your mam and dad never planned?
842
00:49:18,741 --> 00:49:21,820
Your little sister?
843
00:49:21,900 --> 00:49:26,900
Well, technically,
she's also your stepdaughter.
844
00:49:28,941 --> 00:49:29,820
The end.
57524
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