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DIGITALLY RESTORED IN 2015

A LESSON IN LOVE

A Comedy for Grown-ups by...

This comedy might have been a tragedy,

but all turned out well, so it became a comedy.

Neither the author nor the actresses are the teachers of this lesson,

but rather life itself with its absurd twists and turns.

Ladies and gentlemen...

you can witness this lesson in love with an indulgent smile,

for the lesson is elementary,

and it's one you learned long ago...

isn't it?

You're a bastard.

You're spoiled, brutish, and cynical.

You call yourself a gynecologist? You've never understood a woman.

If I had the energy, I'd laugh at all this.

You're so terribly naive.

So you don't want to marry me? - No, thank you.

What a storm!

- The angels are crying. - The boy's feeling remorse.

Perhaps, my dear Susanne.

Sadness and remorse are Siamese twins.

- I can go on being your lover. - No, thank you.

At least stop thanking me!

So it's definitely over?

Yes. Thanks for what we had together.

You want me to start yelling?

I admit my retreat is deplorable, but I'm no passionate superman.

I'm just a tired and boring man with a headache and regrets.

Could it be any sadder? - Because you're getting old.

That's right.

I'm an itty-bitty...

teeny-tiny bit old.

Go back to your forgiving wife's forgiving embrace.

No doubt she's waiting to be plucked off the shelf and dusted off

like a trusty old pipe!

Please show Mrs. Verin out and the next patient in.

- Out. - In a moment.

Good-bye, David.

I do feel sorry for you.

Always looking at women from odd angles

eventually makes a man quite peculiar.

Where is my key, by the way?

You're sublime... you bore!

Next.

Next.

Doctor, I have a terrible problem

that keeps me awake at night.

You cheered up my husband on another occasion.

I have such confidence in you.

This rain is incredible!

I'm wondering if my husband and I should remarry.

After 10 years and two children together,

we divorced when I met a younger man

who gave me that special something, you know?

But he was very young and had to do his military duty,

and then my husband returned —

Excuse me.

A life-and-death emergency is calling me.

There are three patients waiting.

My life and my death!

But what should I do?

A piece of advice: The conjugal bed is love's demise.

You're terrible!

No, I'm not. Not at all.

Bye!

And here I thought the doctor was really —

Did you, now?

If I weren't a Christian woman, I'd say "damnation!"

Sam, don't you ever have trouble with women?

- Not since I killed my fiancée. - Not exactly what I meant.

Then your father, the old professor, operated on my head.

He did a bolo— - Lobotomy.

- Could be. - I'm sure it was.

I'm very grateful. Now I only run amok twice a year,

and I don't even eat or drink.

How practical!

It's the thunderstorm.

But we should be able to pick up something.

I'm going to nap. I'm tired.

And a little bit old.

A teeny-tiny bit old...

She first came to see me in the spring.

She seemed nervous and unsettled,

which made me nervous and unsettled too.

Your symptoms don't seem particularly alarming, Mrs. Verin...

but let's examine you anyway,

just to be safe.

Please undress behind the screen.

Do you find me attractive?

- How old are you? - Why do you ask?

For my records.

- I was born in '32. - Already married at 21?

Are you sorry to hear it?

Get undressed and stop chattering.

You have such beautiful hands.

- Kind of you to say. - And an adorable neck.

Is that so?

What's it like watching women undress all day?

It's no fun, I assure you.

I'm so afraid.

Will you be gentle?

Get undressed now. I have patients waiting.

I have a confession to make.

A con