Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: {790}{900}Ladies and gentlemen,|welcome to my underground lair. {907}{950}I have gathered here|before me... {953}{1015}the world's|deadliest assassins... {1020}{1154}and yet each of you has failed|to kill Austin Powers. {1160}{1248}That makes me angry,|and when Dr. Evil gets angry... {1250}{1300}Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset. {1310}{1370}And when Mr. Bigglesworth|gets upset... {1402}{1438}people die! {1598}{1678}Why must I be surrounded|by frickin' idiots? {1852}{1918}Mustafa, Frau Farbissina... {1930}{1990}I spared your lives|because I need you... {1993}{2065}to help me rid the world|of Britain's top secret agent... {2070}{2147}the only man|who can stop me now. {2150}{2219}We must kill Austin Powers! {2375}{2395}Yeah! {3166}{3230}Come on, babies.|Work with me, people, all right? {3235}{3260}Show me love. {3334}{3370}Great, baby! Yeah! {3400}{3432}Oh, behave. {3478}{3524}It's Austin Powers! {4000}{4020}It's Austin Powers! {5348}{5390}Hello, Mrs. Kensington. {5395}{5424}Hello, Austin. {5444}{5514}Why don't you ever model|for me, Mrs. Kensington? {5526}{5600}You know how Mr. Kensington|feels about that. {5607}{5648}Oh, behave. {5660}{5690}Yeah. {5698}{5774}Yeah, baby! Yeah! {5798}{5810}Ow! {5910}{5935}Hello Austin. {5939}{6011} I'm Basil Exposition|with British lntelligence. {6017}{6085}We have just received|word that Dr. Evil... {6089}{6131}is planning a trap for you|tonight... {6134}{6210}at the Electric Psychedelic|Pussycat Swinger's Club... {6213}{6250}here in swinging London. {6254}{6285}We'll be there. {6715}{6775}~Good sense, innocence, cripplin' mankind~|-There you go. Come on, baby. Yeah! Yeah! {6776}{6805}~Good sense, innocence, cripplin' mankind~| {6812}{6895}~Dead kings, many things I can't define~| {6900}{6954}~Occasions, persuasions clutter your mind~| {6955}{6995}~Occasions, persuasions clutter your mind~|-Austin, it's a swinging shindig. {6996}{7014}~Incense and peppermints, the color of time~|-Austin, it's a swinging shindig. {7015}{7021}~Incense and peppermints, the color of time~| {7022}{7070}~Incense and peppermints, the color of time~|-It's my happening, baby, and it freaks me out! {7071}{7099}~Who cares what games we choose?~|-It's my happening, baby, and it freaks me out! {7100}{7107}~Who cares what games we choose?~| {7108}{7138}~Who cares what games we choose?~|-Yeah, man! {7139}{7155}~Who cares what games we choose?~| {7160}{7245}~Little to win but nothin' to lose~| {7250}{7335}~Incense and peppermints, meaningless nouns~| {7337}{7420}~Turn on, tune in, turn your eyes around~| {7422}{7580}~Look at yourself,|look at yourself, yeah, yeah~ {7582}{7597}~Look at yourself, look at yourself~| {7598}{7639}~Look at yourself, look at yourself~|-Can I get you a drink, Mr. Powers? {7640}{7662}~Look at yourself, look at yourself~|-Sure! {7668}{7734}~Yeah, yeah!~|-Austin, we've got to look for Dr. Evil. {7738}{7750}Wait. {7770}{7810}I've got an idea. {7850}{7906}Austin! Why on earth|did you hit that woman? {7915}{7950}Right. Let me show you, baby. {7975}{8007}That ain't no woman. {8019}{8059}It's a man, man. {8115}{8175}It's one of Dr. Evil's assassins. {8200}{8237}Look out! He's got a knife! {8385}{8408}Good work, Mrs. Kensington. {8410}{8439}Alright. Get up! {8443}{8463}Get up! {8475}{8530}Right. Where's Dr. Evil? Huh? {8535}{8555}Where is he? {8620}{8659}There's the bastard. {8715}{8741}Come on. Let's go. {8748}{8765}Coming through. {8770}{8795}Excuse me! {8880}{8933}I've got you now, Dr. Evil. {8935}{8967}Not this time. {8980}{9018}Come, Mr. Bigglesworth! {9035}{9115}See you in the future,|Mr. Powers. {9208}{9283}My God! He's freezing himself. {9920}{9970}And so Dr. Evil escaped... {9974}{10028}and had himself|cryogenically frozen... {10037}{10101}to return at a time when free|love no longer reigned... {10105}{10160}and greed and corruption|ruled again. {10555}{10572}Yes? {10575}{10607}Commander Gilmour? {10609}{10625}Speaking. {10629}{10683}Commander, this is Ritter in|Sou-west Com Three. {10685}{10741}We have a potential bogey|with erratic vectoring... {10745}{10779}and an unorthodox entry angle. {10785}{10829}What are you saying, son? {10849}{10910}Well, it appears to be|in the shape of a Big Boy. {10915}{10971}Good God. He's back. {10985}{11042}Well, in many ways,|the Big Boy never left, sir. {11044}{11090}He's always offered|the same high-quality meals... {11093}{11135}at competitive prices. {11137}{11150}Shut up. {11170}{11224}Shall I scramble Tac HQ|for an intercept? {11227}{11258}What's its current position? {11265}{11315}I'm presently tracking it|over Nevada. {11345}{11388}Oh, my God! The Big Boy's gone. {11390}{11425}Listen, son... {11430}{11498}I want you to forget|what you saw here today. {11525}{11544}Phillips? {11553}{11594}Call the President. {11598}{11682}Prepare the jet,|bring my overnight bag... {11702}{11760}and er... Phillips, feed my fish. {11780}{11810}Not too much. {11840}{11896}I'm off to London, England. {12030}{12078}Powers volunteered|to have himself frozen... {12080}{12135}in case Dr. Evil|should ever return. {12140}{12186}Well, I hope your boy's up to it. {12190}{12315}We don't want to have to bail|you guys out again like after WW II. {12363}{12410}This is our celebrity vault. {12775}{12800}Please. {12823}{12869}So, who is this Austin Powers? {12871}{12961}The ultimate gentleman spy.|Irresistible to women... {12963}{13074}deadly to his enemies,|a legend in his own time. {13080}{13180}Attention. Stage one:|laser cutting beginning. {13285}{13336}Laser cutting complete. {13602}{13710}Stage two: warm liquid|goo phase beginning. {13800}{13867}Warm liquid goo phase complete. {13882}{13974}Stage three:|reanimation beginning. {14014}{14070}Reanimation complete. {14268}{14352}Stage four:|cleansing beginning. {14489}{14525}Cleansing complete. {15080}{15177}Stage five:|evacuation beginning. {15887}{15920}Evacuation comp- {16155}{16190}Evacuation comp- {16230}{16245}comp- {16265}{16280}comp- {16325}{16370}Evacuation comp- {16600}{16645}Whe... Where am I? {16662}{16721}You're in the Ministry of Defense. {16728}{16770}It's 1997. {16775}{16847}You've been cryogenically|frozen for 30 years. {16855}{16890}Who are these people? {16899}{16935}The shouting is a|temporary side effect... {16938}{16980}of the unfreezing process. {16985}{17030}Yes. I'm having|difficulty controlling... {17032}{17083}the volume of my voice! {17103}{17175}This is Commander Gilmour,|U.S. Strategic Command... {17178}{17255}and General Borschevsky,|Russian Intelligence. {17257}{17310}Russian Intelligence?|Are you mad? {17312}{17370}A lot's happened|since you were frozen. {17380}{17415}The cold war's over. {17417}{17525}Well, finally, those capitalist pigs|will pay for their crimes, eh? {17527}{17564}Eh, comrades, eh? {17570}{17627}Austin, we won. {17630}{17704}Oh. Groovy. Smashing.|Yay, capitalism. {17710}{17765}Hello. Hello. {17770}{17830}Mr. Powers,|the president's quite concerned. {17832}{17892}We've got a madman|on the loose in Nevada. {17900}{17920}Dr. Evil. {17955}{17980}When do I begin? {17985}{18010}Immediately. {18017}{18062}You'll be working|with Miss Kensington. {18075}{18116}Mrs. Kensington! {18120}{18216}Austin, Mrs. Kensington|has long since retired. {18220}{18277}Miss Kensington is her daughter. {18310}{18351}Ah, here she is. {18418}{18490}Vanessa is one|of our top agents. {18645}{18705}My God, Vanessa's|got a fabulous body... {18713}{18783}and I bet she shags like a minx. {18822}{18885}How do I tell them that because|of the unfreezing process... {18887}{18930}I have no inner monologue? {18982}{19072}I hope I didn't say that|out loud just now. {19176}{19270}Mr. Powers, my job is to|acclimatize you to the nineties. {19274}{19353}You know, a lot's changed since 1967. {19356}{19395}No doubt, luv,|but as long as people... {19397}{19460}are still having promiscuous sex|with many anonymous partners... {19462}{19487}without protection... {19490}{19580}while at the same time experimenting|with mind-expanding drugs... {19582}{19632}in a consequence-free|environment... {19636}{19685}I'll be sound as a pound. {19718}{19808}Well, erm... Agent Kensington|will get you all set up. {19825}{19885}She's extremely dedicated. {19890}{19940}So, Austin, good luck. {19945}{19993}The world's depending on you. {20007}{20035}Thanks, Exposition. {20037}{20065}Oh and, Austin... {20068}{20090}Yes? {20118}{20149}Be careful! {20212}{20240}Thanks. {20380}{20439}Danger Powers' personal effects. {20444}{20518}Actually, my name|is Austin Powers. {20521}{20570}It says here Name:|"Danger Powers" {20574}{20603}No, no, no, no, no. {20628}{20683}Danger's my middle name. {20720}{20774}Okay. Austin Danger Powers {20790}{20850}One blue crushed velvet suit... {20853}{20877}Oh hey, all right. {20879}{20917}One frilly lace cravat... {20920}{20950}There it is. {20959}{21020}One silver medallion|with male symbol... {21035}{21115}-One pair of Italian boots...|-Buon giorno, boys. {21119}{21160}One vinyl record album... {21163}{21239}-Burt Bacharach plays his hits...|-Hey Burt! Hey. Yeah. {21255}{21375}One Swedish-made|penis enlarger pump... {21410}{21445}That's not mine. {21449}{21543}One credit card receipt for|Swedish-made penis enlarger... {21550}{21600}signed by Austin Powers. {21602}{21673}I'm telling you, baby,|that's not mine. {21675}{21767}One warranty card for Swedish-made|penis enlarger pump... {21772}{21830}filled out by Austin Powers. {21832}{21910}I don't even know what this is. This|sort of thing ain't my bag, baby. {21912}{21980}One book: Swedish-made|Penis Enlarger Pumps And Me... {21982}{22066}(This sort of thing|is my bag, baby)... {22070}{22130}by Austin Powers. {22160}{22185}Ah. {22190}{22227}Just sign the form. {22230}{22333}Okay. Don't get heavy, man. I'll sign it,|just to get things moving, you know. {22340}{22376}You're all right, baby? {22390}{22424}Listen, Mr. Powers. {22445}{22495}Erm... I look forward|to working with you but... {22500}{22545}do me a favor and|stop calling me baby. {22555}{22614}You can address me as...|Agent Kensington. {22628}{22660}Oh, come on. {22695}{22740}All right, then...Vanessa. {22742}{22784}Was that so hard? {22820}{22870}Now, come along.|We have to leave immediately. {22874}{22930}We preserved your private jet|just as you left it. {22933}{22966}It's waiting|at Heathrow Airport. {22980}{23045}My jumbo jet! Smashing, baby! {23050}{23099}Oops! Sorry. {23120}{23144}Mister Powers. {23230}{23255}Quickly. {23275}{23320}Quickly. Come on, lad. Let's go. {23675}{23752}Gentlemen, welcome|to my underground lair. {23757}{23825}It's been 30 years,|but I'm back. {23829}{23880}Everything's gone perfectly|to plan... {23882}{23935}except for one small flaw... {23940}{24014}Due to a technical error|by my henchman Mustafa... {24022}{24110}complications arose|in the unfreezing process. {24120}{24161}But my design was perfect. {24175}{24235}Look what you did|to Mr. Bigglesworth! {24275}{24362}But, Dr. Evil, we were|unable to anticipate {24364}{24427}feline complications to|the reanimation process... {24429}{24455}Silence! {24650}{24710}Let this be a|reminder to you all... {24713}{24790}that this organization|will not tolerate failure. {24920}{25000}Gentlemen, let's|get down to business. {25100}{25140}We've got a lot of work to do. {25142}{25173}Somebody help me! {25178}{25276}I'm still alive, only|I'm very badly burned. {25320}{25360}Some of you I know... {25365}{25425}some of you I'm meeting|for the first time. {25430}{25500}Hello up there! Anyone! {25510}{25600}Could someone call an ambulance?|I'm in quite a lot of pain. {25610}{25670}Okay. You've all been gathered|here to form my evil cabinet. {25672}{25696}Excuse me. {25730}{25762}Yes. He's down there. {25777}{25864}No, not dead.|Burned. Badly. {25900}{25925}Yes. {25955}{25980}Right. {25985}{26040}If somebody could open|the retrieval hatch down here... {26042}{26065}I could get out. {26075}{26130}See, I designed this device myself... {26140}{26172}Oh. Ah. {26180}{26235}Good. I'm glad|you found me. Listen... {26240}{26310}I'm very badly burned,|so if you could just... {26340}{26375}You shot me! {26390}{26415}Okay. Moving on ... {26417}{26486}You shot me right|in the arm! Why did... {26770}{26860}Right. Let me go around the table|and introduce everyone. {26862}{26905}Frau Farbissina - {26910}{26985}founder of the militant wing|of the Salvation Army. {26995}{27130}Random Task - Korean ex-wrestler,|evil handyman extraordinaire. {27140}{27215}Random Task, show|them what you do. {27560}{27645}Patty O'Brien - ex-Irish assassin. {27650}{27705}His trademark -|a superstitious man... {27707}{27770}he leaves a tiny keepsake|from his good luck bracelet... {27773}{27815}on every victim he kills. {27820}{27930}Scotland Yard would love to get their|hands on that piece of evidence. {27945}{28011}Yeah. They're always|after me lucky charms. {28140}{28215}What? Why does everyone always|laugh when I say that? {28225}{28275}They are after me lucky charms! {28290}{28317}What? {28325}{28410}It's a television commercial... {28415}{28450}with this cartoon leprechaun... {28455}{28523}and all of these children|are trying to chase him... {28525}{28560}"Hey, leprechaun man!|Leprechaun man!" {28565}{28610}"Won't you give|your Lucky Charms?" {28640}{28710}Oh. And there's all these little|tiny bits of marshmallows... {28712}{28760}just stuck right in the cereal... {28765}{28795}so that when the kids|eat them, they think... {28800}{28855}"Oh, this is candy.|I'm having fun!" {28930}{29020}Finally, we come to my|number-two man. His name... {29050}{29080}Number Two. {29090}{29150}For 30 years, Number|Two has run Virtucon... {29155}{29230}the legitimate face|of my evil empire. {29270}{29340}Dr. Evil,|over the last 30 years... {29350}{29420}Virtucon has grown|by leaps and bounds. {29430}{29530}About 15 years ago, we changed|from volatile chemicals... {29535}{29580}to the communications industry. {29610}{29680}We own cable companies|in 38 states. {29685}{29715}We own a steel mill|in Cleveland... {29730}{29815}shipping in Texas,|oil refineries in Seattle... {29820}{29855}and a factory in Chicago... {29857}{29930}that makes miniature|models of factories. {29937}{29960}Naturally. {29980}{30010}Gentlemen... {30060}{30100}I have a plan. {30340}{30386}It's called blackmail. {30395}{30445}As you know, the royal|family of Britain... {30448}{30511}are the wealthiest|landowners in the world. {30520}{30620}Either the royal family pays us|an exorbitant amount of money... {30625}{30680}or we make it seem|that Prince Charles... {30685}{30850}has had an affair outside of marriage|and therefore, would have to divorce. {30905}{30952}Prince Charles did have an affair... {30960}{31025}he admitted it, and|they are now divorced. {31030}{31090}Right. Okay, people, you have to|tell me these things, all right? {31093}{31190}I've been frozen for 30 years. Okay? {31199}{31262}Throw me a frickin' bone here. {31264}{31333}I'm the boss. Need the info. {31365}{31390}Okay. No problem. {31405}{31445}Here's my second plan. {31447}{31517}Back in the sixties, I developed|a weather-changing machine... {31520}{31620}which was in essence a sophisticated|heat beam which we called a "laser". {31628}{31700}Using these "lasers",|we punch a hole... {31702}{31750}in the protective layer|around the world... {31754}{31822}which we call the "ozone layer". {31830}{31922}Slowly but surely, ultraviolet|rays would pour in... {31926}{32010}increasing the risk of skin|cancer. That is... {32020}{32050}...unless... {32070}{32170}...the world|pays us a hefty ransom. {32290}{32370}That also already has happened. {32370}{32398}Shit. {32450}{32490}Oh, hell, let's just do|what we always do: {32495}{32570}hijack some nuclear weapons|and hold the world hostage. {32580}{32635}Good. Gentlemen, it's|come to my attention {32640}{32700}that a breakaway Russian republic,|Kreplachistan... {32705}{32750}is about to transfer|a nuclear warhead... {32755}{32795}to the United Nations|in a few days. {32800}{32830}Here's the plan. {32850}{32925}We get the warhead and we|hold the world ransom for... {32975}{33045}one million dollars! {33125}{33235}Don't you think we should maybe ask|for more than a million dollars? {33240}{33308}A million dollars isn't exactly|a lot of money these days. {33325}{33416}Virtucon alone makes|over $9 billion a year. {33420}{33440}Really? {33455}{33480}That's a lot more. {33510}{33530}OK, then. {33540}{33585}We hold the world ransom for... {33640}{33745}one hundred billion dollars! {33800}{33834}~Austin Powers, he's the man for you!~| {33835}{33898}~Austin Powers, he's the man for you!~|-Pretty groovy jumbo jet, eh? {33900}{34000}When you see this jet a-rockin' don't|come a-knockin', baby! Yeah. {34005}{34058}I'm going to need you to sign|these release forms. {34060}{34085}Release forms? {34090}{34146}Oh, yes. You're not officially|working for Ministry of Defense... {34150}{34185}and these forms indemnify|the ministry against... {34190}{34260}any mishaps that may occur|in the line of duty. {34280}{34305}Mishaps? {34315}{34407}But isn't that what being an|international man of mystery's all about? {34420}{34545}Okay. Name: Austin... Danger Powers. {34550}{34583}Sex: Yes, please! {34630}{34735}How does a hot chick like you end up|working at the Ministry of Defense? {34755}{34790}Uh. Well, I went to Oxford... {34798}{34850}where I excelled|in several subjects... {34855}{34911}but I ended up specializing|in foreign languages. {34916}{34955}Now, I really wanted to travel. {34960}{34999}You know,|sort of see the world? {35001}{35030}That's fascinating, Vanessa. {35032}{35080}Listen, why don't we go|in the back and shag? {35082}{35101}What? {35115}{35140}I've been frozen for 30 years. {35142}{35211}I've gotta see if my bits|and pieces are still working. {35216}{35235}Excuse me? {35237}{35275}My wedding tackle. {35280}{35299}I'm sorry, I... {35301}{35362}My meat and two veg,|my twig and berries. {35364}{35430}-Hello, lads, you still awake? Hello?|-Mr. Powers! Mr. Powers, please. {35450}{35530}I'd appreciate it if you could|concentrate on our mission and... {35532}{35579}give your libido a rest. {35610}{35640}Can I er... {35655}{35710}Can I show you something? {35720}{35795}~If you're feeling sad and lonely~ {35810}{35895}~There's a service I can render~ {35903}{35990}~Tell the one who loves you, only~ {35995}{36055}~I can be so warm and tender~| {36056}{36075}~I can be so warm and tender~|-I won't bite... {36076}{36100}~Call me.~|-I won't bite... {36101}{36105}~Call me.~| {36110}{36135}~Don't be afraid, you can~|-hard. {36136}{36169}~Don't be afraid, you can~| {36172}{36200}~Call me.~| {36210}{36249}~Maybe it's late, but just~| {36252}{36259}~Call me.~| {36260}{36285}~Call me.~|-All right. {36286}{36334}~Tell me and I'll be around.~| {36335}{36372}~Tell me and I'll be around.~|-Let me ask you a question, {36375}{36405}and be honest. {36465}{36500}Do I make you horny? {36510}{36535}Randy? {36542}{36605}Do I make you horny,|baby? Yeah! Do I? {36610}{36630}God! {36632}{36660}|-I hope this is part of the unfreezing process. {36661}{36680}"We're experiencing a bit of turbulence!"|-I hope this is part of the unfreezing process. {36681}{36686}"We're experiencing a bit of turbulence!"| {36687}{36695}"We're experiencing a bit of turbulence!"|-Oh, turbulence! {36696}{36715}"We would like to ask you to fasten"|-Oh, turbulence! {36716}{36725}"We would like to ask you to fasten"|-Oh, look at that! Oh, turbulence! {36726}{36768}"your seat-belts. Seat-belts fasten."|-Oh, look at that! Oh, turbulence! {36770}{36790}Oh, I've gone over! {36795}{36855}Oh, I fell over again! {36885}{36905}Mister Powers! {36930}{36995}I will never have|sex with you, ever! {36997}{37070}If you were the last man on Earth and|I was the last woman on Earth... {37072}{37100}and the future|of the human race... {37102}{37163}depended on our having sex|simply for procreation... {37170}{37222}I still would not|have sex with you. {37245}{37286}What's your point, Vanessa? {37385}{37486}~...me. Don't be afraid.|You can call me.~ {37495}{37576}~Maybe it's late but just call me.~ {37585}{37690}~tell me and I'll be around.~ {37695}{37720}Yeah! {37730}{37795}Remember when we froze|your semen? {37799}{37855}You said if it didn't look|like you were coming back... {37860}{37905}we should try to make you a son... {37907}{37950}so that a part of|you could live forever. {37952}{37970}Oh, sure. {37972}{38085}Well, after a couple of years,|we got a little impatient. {38100}{38205}Dr. Evil, I want|you to meet your son. {38207}{38230}My son? {38237}{38260}Ya. {38270}{38310}Scott! {38510}{38540}Hello, Scott. {38550}{38570}Hi. {38600}{38635}I'm your father. {38670}{38700}Dr. Evil. {38770}{38810}I haven't seen you|my whole life... {38815}{38900}and... and now you come back|and just expect a relationship? {38920}{38945}I hate you. {39030}{39057}What? {39070}{39105}Could I have a hug? {39120}{39140}No. {39185}{39222}-Give me a hug.|-No way. {39225}{39252}-Come here!|-I'm not coming over there. {39255}{39280}-Let's go.|-Forget it. {39282}{39325}-Pronto.|-What are you doing? {39330}{39397}I'm with it. I'm hip. {39740}{39790}Don't look at me|like I'm frickin' Frankenstein. {39792}{39820}Give your father a hug. {39840}{39895}-You're... Hey, don't touch me!|-Hug! Hug! Hug! {39900}{39922}Hug... {39930}{40000}-Hug!|-Get away from me, you lazy-eyed psycho! {40400}{40477}Viva Las Vegas, baby! Yeah! {40670}{40730}Wow! Ooh! Yeah! {40765}{40790}Welcome to Las Vegas, sir. {40880}{40955}So, which side of the|bed do you want? {40965}{41015}You're sleeping on the sofa, Mr. Powers. {41020}{41100}In fact, I'd like to take this|opportunity to remind you... {41102}{41140}that the only reason|we're sharing a room... {41142}{41210}is to keep up the context that we're|a married couple on vacation. {41215}{41315}Right. Shall we shag now,|or shall we shag later? {41325}{41370}How do you like to do it?|Do you like to wash up first... {41372}{41446}you know, top and tails,|whore's bath? {41460}{41525}Personally, before I'm on the job, I like|to give my undercarriage... {41527}{41565}a bit of a how's-your-father. {41615}{41690}I'm just joking, Vanessa. I'm just|trying to get a rise out of you... {41692}{41753}that's all, for shits and giggles. {41765}{41790}Let's unpack. {41965}{41980}Oh, blimey! {41990}{42030}Nerd alert! {42380}{42420}How did this get in here? {42422}{42465}Somebody's|playing a prank on me. {42472}{42525}Honestly, it's not mine. {42540}{42575}Hey, Americans! Yeah! {42595}{42630}Enjoy that wine. {42635}{42665}Hey, there you are. {42670}{42699}Hi! Do I know you? {42701}{42735}No, but that's where you are.|You're there. {42740}{42820}Hey! Viva Las Vegas, baby. Hey! {42822}{42850}-Okay, Austin.|-Yes? {42852}{42923}Austin, there's a company|in Las Vegas called Virtucon... {42925}{42975}which we think may be|linked to Dr. Evil. {42995}{43070}Plenty of Virtucon executives|are gambling in this casino. {43090}{43133}Smashing. Let's go. {43140}{43165}Look. There's one over there. {43180}{43205}Changing a thousand. {43210}{43265}Hello. Excuse me. {43355}{43390}Do you mind if I join you? {43395}{43425}Not at all. {43475}{43520}The game is blackjack,|gentlemen. {43525}{43585}Ten thousand dollars|minimum bet. {43590}{43645}King for you, sir,|and a three for you. {43708}{43740}Seventeen? {43920}{43950}Hit me. {43952}{44007}You have 17, sir. {44025}{44075}I like to live dangerously. {44150}{44210}Four. Twenty-one. {44365}{44390}Five. {44455}{44498}I'll stay. {44515}{44576}I suggest you hit, sir. {44635}{44710}I also like to live dangerously. {44720}{44760}As you wish, sir. {44827}{44870}Twenty beats your five. {44885}{44925}I'm sorry, sir. {44925}{44970}Well, I won't lie to you. {44980}{45040}Cards are not my bag, baby. {45050}{45115}Allow myself to introduce... {45145}{45190}myself. {45203}{45335}My name is Richie Cunningham,|and this is my wife Oprah. {45375}{45425}My name is Number Two. {45430}{45480}This is my Italian|confidential secretary. {45482}{45520}Her name is Alotta... {45535}{45570}Alotta Fagina. {45612}{45642}Come again? {45648}{45685}Alotta Fagina. {45690}{45720}Ah, sorry, I'm just not getting it. {45722}{45800}It sounded like you said|your name was a lot of...er... {45830}{45850}Never mind. {45925}{45990}What exactly do you do,|Mr. Number Two? {45992}{46025}That's my business. {46030}{46050}Oh. {46052}{46120}Now, if you'll excuse me, I have|to go to the little boys' room. {46160}{46205}You keep your eye|on the Italian bird. {46215}{46270}We'll rendezvous|back at the hotel suite. {46675}{46720}You didn't happen to see... {46740}{46770}anything at all? {46807}{46830}Sorry. {47170}{47195}Howdy. {47370}{47415}That is one crazy getup|you got there, fella. {47417}{47440}Oh, thank you. {47447}{47470}Are you in the show? {47480}{47540}Ah, no, actually, I'm English. {47565}{47590}Ooh, I'm sorry. {47610}{47635}Right. {47885}{47905}Hey, partner? {47910}{47945}Have a good one. {47950}{47980}Okay. {48545}{48605}Hey, partner, come on, you|gotta relax. Don't force it. {48607}{48660}Gonna blow out your o-ring,|drop a lung. {48985}{49100}Who does Number Two work for? {49110}{49200}Who does Number Two work for? {49205}{49266}That's right, buddy.|You show that turd who's boss. {49330}{49444}Hey! Hey, just grab ahold of something,|bite your lip, and give it hell. Come on! {49460}{49495}We're gonna get through this. {49600}{49680}Hey, that sounds pretty nasty. How|about a courtesy flush over there? {49895}{49940}Jesus Christ, boy. {49950}{49977}What did you eat? {50245}{50270}Gentlemen... {50290}{50335}the warhead is ours. {50355}{50456}Patch me through to the United Nations|security secret meeting room. {50495}{50565}Gentlemen, my name is Dr. Evil. {50572}{50682}In a little while you'll notice that the|Kreplachistani warhead has gone missing. {50690}{50775}If you want it back, you're|going to have to pay me... {50805}{50885}One million dollars! {51035}{51070}Sorry. {51095}{51175}One hundred billion dollars. {51185}{51225}Gentlemen, silence. {51248}{51299}Now, Mr. Evil... {51301}{51335}Dr. Evil. {51337}{51460}I didn't spend six years in evil medical school|to be called "Mister", thank you very much. {51468}{51518}It is the policy|of the United Nations... {51523}{51585}not to negotiate|with terrorists. {51590}{51622}Really? {51650}{51675}So long. {51845}{52020}Gentlemen, in exactly five days,|we will be $100 billion richer. {52880}{52925}Hello? Mommy? {52927}{52950}Hello, Vanessa. {52955}{52996}And? How's Austin? {53007}{53040}He's asleep. {53050}{53087}You didn't. {53092}{53190}Oh, God! No! No, I made|him sleep on the sofa. {53192}{53262}Vanessa, I'm proud of you. {53285}{53302}Why? {53310}{53425}Because you've managed to|resist Austin Powers' charms! {53428}{53470}What? God knows he tried, mommy. {53472}{53527}I actually had to be|rather firm with him. {53529}{53582}You didn't tell me he|is so obsessed with sex! {53585}{53622}It's really bizarre. {53630}{53680}You can't judge him|by modern standards. {53682}{53713}What about his teeth? {53720}{53830}Darling, you have to understand,|in Britain in the sixties... {53835}{53915}you could be a sex symbol|and still have bad teeth. {53920}{53950}It didn't matter. {53965}{53995}I don't get that, mommy. {54000}{54120}Once Austin has you in his charms,|it's impossible to get out. {54122}{54143}Did you ever? {54148}{54210}Me? No, of course not. {54215}{54256}I was married to your father. {54270}{54333}You didn't ever want to, did you? {54336}{54430}Austin is very charming very debonair. {54440}{54490}He's handsome, witty... {54492}{54536}has a knowledge of fine wines. {54540}{54573}He's sophisticated. {54580}{54640}A world renown photographer. {54660}{54740}Women want him,|and men want to be him. {54750}{54830}Every bit an|international man of mystery. {54835}{54880}Yeah, but you didn't|answer my question, mummy. {54885}{54917}I know. {54940}{54982}Let me just say this... {54995}{55110}Austin was the most|loyal and caring friend I ever had. {55130}{55170}I will always love him. {55210}{55250}Uh! Ah. {55265}{55290}Do you want to speak to him? {55292}{55340}No. It's been too long. {55345}{55405}Okay, well, now, I'm going to|have to go, mummy, but I love you. {55410}{55445}Ciao, darling. {55585}{55622}A limo's just pulled up. {55645}{55680}Let me see. {55735}{55798}-That's Dr. Evil's cat.|-How can you tell? {55800}{55840}I never forget a pussy... {55880}{55905}cat. {56000}{56050}Oh, no. He's gone away. {56125}{56225}My God, Vanessa,|you are so incredibly beautiful. {56260}{56330}-Oh, no.|-That's it. Yes. Yes. Yes. {56333}{56362}Come on, darling... {56370}{56440}I want take you out|for a night on the town. {56700}{56775}Ladies and gentlemen,|Mr. Burt Bacharach. {56785}{56875}~What the world needs now~ {56895}{56970}~Is love, sweet love.~ {56990}{57055}~No, not just for some~ {57075}{57130}~no, but everyone.~ {57160}{57260}~What the world needs now~ {57270}{57360}~Is love, sweet love.~ {57380}{57460}~No, not just for some~ {57475}{57655}~but for everyone.~ {58280}{58300}Oh, yeah. {58302}{58355}-Oh god, Austin, get on with it.|-I'm going to do it. {58358}{58420}-Do you want me to do it?|-Ah! Oh, go on! {58422}{58450}-Do you want me to do it?|-Yes! {58465}{58550}Okay. Right hand green! {58552}{58564}~You showed me how to do~| {58565}{58605}~You showed me how to do~|-Oh no. No! {58606}{58630}~You showed me how to do~| {58631}{58649}~Exactly what you do~| {58650}{58685}~Exactly what you do~|-You all right? {58686}{58689}~How I fell in love with you~| {58690}{58719}~How I fell in love with you~|-You all right? {58720}{58745}~How I fell in love with you~|-Oh, you know what? {58747}{58805}Wait a tick.|I forgot something in the lobby. {58835}{58895}Why don't I take the stairs? {58985}{59080}Why take the stairs|when I could take the escalator? {59215}{59290}Why take the escalator when|I've got a perfectly good canoe? {59375}{59450}I know what...|I'll take the elevator. {59555}{59575}Austin? {59578}{59605}Yes? {59610}{59619}~And now you love me too~| {59620}{59665}~And now you love me too~|-Come and have some champagne with me. {59668}{59690}~And now you love me too~|-Okay. {59691}{59705}~And now you love me too~| {59720}{59755}Oh, I tripped. Uh. {59780}{59830}You know, I haven't had|this much fun since college. {59840}{59870}Well, I'm sorry. {59875}{59960}~And now you love me too~| {59890}{59910}~And now you love me too~|-Why? {59912}{59945}~And now you love me too~|-I'm sorry that bug up your ass {59946}{59985}had to die. {60070}{60130}Always wanting to have fun, Austin,|that's you in a nutshell. {60132}{60163}No, this is me in a nutshell. {60168}{60215}Help! I'm in a nutshell! {60220}{60280}How did I get|into this nutshell? {60285}{60320}Look at the size of|this bloody great big nutshell. {60322}{60390}What sort of shell|has a nut like this? {60392}{60430}I mean, this is crazy. {60445}{60485}Yes, look at you. {60520}{60555}-You're smashed.|-No, I'm not. {60559}{60610}-Yes, you are.|-No, I'm not. I'm the sensible one. {60612}{60670}I'm always the|designated driver. {60760}{60800}-Kiss me.|-I can't, darling. {60802}{60860}-Why not?|-'Cause you're drunk. It's not right. {60862}{60883}No, I'm not drunk. {60885}{60966}I'm just beginning to see what my mummy|was talking about all those years ago. {60970}{60999}I can't. {61075}{61155}Tell me all about my mummy in the sixties.|I'm dying to know what she was like. {61190}{61240}She was very groovy. {61315}{61360}Your dad loved her very much. {61435}{61470}If there was one other cat|in this world... {61472}{61555}that could have loved her and treated|her as well as your dad... {61565}{61595}then it was me. {61640}{61734}But unfortunately|for yours truly... {61820}{61859}that train has sailed. {61965}{61985}Vanessa? {62005}{62050}Vanessa? Hello? {62090}{62160}Come on, roll over. Sleepytime. {62280}{62325}Okay, Austin needs his hand back. {62525}{62555}You've got mail. {62580}{62685}Hello, Austin. This is Basil|Exposition from British Intelligence. {62690}{62770}Now, I want you to find out|what part Virtucon plays... {62772}{62830}in something called|Project Vulcan. {62832}{62930}I need you to go to Alotta|Fagina's penthouse immediately. {63600}{63635}Hello, hello. {63760}{63790}Yes, yes. Okay. Great! {63890}{63930}Project Vulcan. {63945}{64010}Yeah. Okay. Cheeky, huh? Yeah. {64020}{64090}Come on, baby, give it to me.|Yes. Yes. Yes! {64092}{64115}NO! NO! {64308}{64385}You seem surprised to see me,|Miss Fagina. {64405}{64507}What do you want Mister...|Cunningham, was it? {64510}{64573}Please, call me Richie. {64601}{64705}Miss Fagina, your boss,|Number Two... {64715}{64828}I understand that cat's|involved in big underground drills. {64833}{64860}How did you know? {64875}{64911}I didn't, baby. {64917}{64960}You just told me. {64975}{65050}It's for the mining|industry Mr. Cunningham. {65053}{65125}You know, er... we can|talk about business later. {65135}{65202}Let me slip into|something more comfortable. {65205}{65250}Oh, behave. {65257}{65290}~The look~ {65315}{65360}~of love~ {65375}{65420}~is in~ {65435}{65490}~your eyes~ {65500}{65530}-~A look~|-Good God. {65550}{65585}~your smile~ {65600}{65685}~can't disguise~ {65720}{65770}~the look~ {65790}{65865}~of love~ {65875}{66070}~is saying so much more than|his words could ever say~ {66115}{66300}~you know when my heart has heard,|well, it takes my breath away~ {66310}{66465}~I can hardly wait to hold,|feel my arms around you~ {66480}{66535}~You've got the look~| {66536}{66554}~You've got the look~|-Come in... {66555}{66563}~of love~|-Come in... {66564}{66587}~of love~| {66588}{66607}~of love~|-and I'll show you {66608}{66612}~of love~|-everything you need to know. {66608}{66650}~it's on~|-everything you need to know. {66658}{66720}~your face~ {66770}{66942}~and when my heart has heard,|well, it takes my breath away~ {66955}{67110}~I can hardly wait to hold,|feel my arms around you~ {67130}{67190}~You've got the look~ {67205}{67255}~of love~ {67260}{67305}~it's on~ {67315}{67366}~your face~ {67380}{67399}~the look...~ {67405}{67435}May I wash you? {67437}{67540}Oh, groovy, baby. Yeah. {67765}{67800}Mmh, yes. {67830}{67885}That feels yummy. {68050}{68175}In Japan, men come first,|and women come second. {68179}{68225}Or sometimes not at all. {68310}{68365}Care for some sak�? {68370}{68416}Sak� it to me, baby. {68500}{68526}Yes. {68530}{68560}Klinky? {68570}{68595}Klinky. {68825}{68893}How do you feel, Mr. Cunningham? {68920}{69003}I feel extreme relaxation. {69125}{69195}How dare you|break wind before me? {69197}{69255}I'm sorry, baby.|I didn't know it was your turn. {69355}{69435}Pardon me for being rude. It was not me.|It was my food. It just popped up {69437}{69524}to say hello and now it's gone|back down below. {69530}{69570}That's beautiful. {69578}{69606}Thank you. {69685}{69750}What exactly do|you do at Virtucon? {69752}{69802}I will tell you all in due time. {69810}{69840}But first... {69847}{69980}Let's make love|you silly hairy little man. {69990}{70044}I say! Hello, vicar. {70125}{70170}Ooh, that is the spot, all right. {70172}{70250}That's the spot right there.|Look at that, now. Good God. {70375}{70440}Austin Powers|is getting too close. {70450}{70488}Any suggestions? {70495}{70530}Jawohl! herr doctor! {70537}{70650}I have created the ultimate|weapon to defeat Austin Powers. {70685}{70735}Bring in the fembots! {70960}{71060}~You keep saying,|you got something for me.~ {71100}{71125}~Something you call love, but confess~|-Go, fembots! {71126}{71195}~Something you call love, but confess~| {71210}{71235}|-These are the latest word {71236}{71247}~You been messin'~|-These are the latest word {71248}{71275}~You been messin'~|-in android replicant technology. {71276}{71315}~where you shouldn't been messin'~|-in android replicant technology. {71316}{71355}~where you shouldn't been messin'~|-Lethal, efficient, brutal. {71356}{71405}~and now someone else is gettin'~|-Lethal, efficient, brutal. {71406}{71475}~all your best.~|-No man can resist their charm. {71480}{71505}|-Send in the guards! {71506}{71515}~These boots are made for walkin'~|-Send in the guards! {71516}{71575}~These boots are made for walkin'~| {71580}{71615}~And that's just what they'll do~| {71616}{71630}~And that's just what they'll do~|-Kill these women. {71631}{71660}|-Kill these women. {71661}{71680}~One of these days,~|-Kill these women. {71685}{71783}~These boots are|gonna walk all over you.~ {71930}{71970}~Are you ready, boots?~ {71980}{72015}~Start walking!~ {72275}{72305}Quite impressive. {72315}{72380}Thank you, herr doctor. {72385}{72435}I like to see girls of that... {72445}{72475}caliber. {72580}{72630}By caliber, of course I mean... {72632}{72683}both the size of|their gun barrels... {72685}{72753}and the high quality of their|character. It's two meanings. {72755}{72785}Caliber... {72787}{72830}It's a homonym. {72910}{72935}Forget it. {73020}{73055}At ease, boys. {73125}{73180}Austin, I want to|show you something. {73195}{73243}We're going to|outfit you with this. {73248}{73309}It looks like a|watch, but, in fact {73315}{73370}it's a geosynchronous|positioning device. {73372}{73410}Very shagadelic. {73420}{73460}And then there's this. {73465}{73490}Okay, let me guess. {73500}{73542}The floss is garrote wire... {73545}{73615}the toothpaste|is plastic explosives... {73619}{73690}and the toothbrush|is the detonation device. {73702}{73736}No, actually. {73745}{73780}Well, since you've been frozen {73782}{73860}there have been fabulous|advances in the field of dentistry. {73865}{73895}What do you mean? {73915}{73940}Nothing. {73950}{73985}Oh, look, here's Basil. {73995}{74020}Hello, Exposition. {74022}{74090}Austin. Let me|bring you up to speed. {74092}{74192}Dr. Evil has hijacked a|nuclear warhead from Kreplachistan. {74195}{74302}Only two things scare me,|and one is nuclear war. {74306}{74330}What's the other? {74332}{74350}Excuse me? {74352}{74394}What's the other thing|that scares you? {74410}{74445}Carnies. {74450}{74475}What? {74477}{74508}Circus folk. {74510}{74540}Nomads, you know. {74542}{74578}Smell like cabbage. {74580}{74625}Small hands. {74635}{74685}Oh, er... indeed. {74690}{74752}Perhaps these photographs are|the last piece of the puzzle. {74754}{74777}Aha! {74779}{74835}I've uncovered the details|of Project Vulcan. {74837}{74900}Oh, good God.|An underground missile? {74902}{74947}Austin, where did you find these? {74955}{75065}Austin did some reconnaissance work|last night at Alotta Fagina's penthouse. {75070}{75165}-Oh.|-Our next move is to infiltrate Virtucon. {75167}{75195}Any ideas? {75235}{75325}Oh, yes. Virtucon runs a tour|of its facility every hour. {75327}{75400}I thought, perhaps, we could|disguise ourselves as tourists {75402}{75450}and do some|on-site reconnaissance. {75470}{75510}Top drawer, Kensington. {75515}{75583}Oh, er... Austin, I'd|like you to meet somebody. {75605}{75680}This is my mother...|Mrs. Exposition. {75682}{75703}How do you do? {75740}{75773}Austin! {75787}{75835}My God, man, what have you done? {75840}{75915}That's not your mother.|It's a man, baby! {75920}{75960}Yeah, yeah. Come on! {75962}{76025}Why won't this wig come off? {76040}{76065}Help! {76070}{76110}-Austin!|-Yeah, hold on, hold on one second. {76112}{76155}No, no! Let go of my mother! {76170}{76245}Oh. Oh, mother. Mother,|are you all right? {76260}{76320}-Austin, have you gone mad?|-No. {76335}{76390}You have a lot|of explaining to do. {76392}{76453}I'm sorry, Basil.|I thought she was a man. {76459}{76505}Damn it, man. You're|talking about my mother! {76510}{76565}Well, you have to admit,|she is rather mannish. {76567}{76585}Austin! {76587}{76618}Well, no offense, but... {76620}{76710}if that is a woman it does look like|she was beaten with an ugly stick. {76720}{76760}-What?|-Really, Austin. {76910}{77020}Okay. Give in to the beauty of|your feelings and say the words. {77022}{77050}Come on. {77070}{77106}I love you, Dad. {77138}{77190}I love you, too, son. {77320}{77405}Okay. Group, we have some|newcomers here today with us. {77410}{77495}Say hello to Scott|and his father Mister... {77510}{77530}Avil? {77532}{77553}Evil. {77560}{77590}Actually... {77645}{77705}Doctor Evil. {77720}{77766}Hello, Dr. Evil. {77770}{77795}Hello, Scott. {77800}{77830}Hello, everybody. {77840}{77888}So, Scott, why don't|we start with you? {77895}{77945}What brings you here|with us today? {77970}{78040}Well, I just really met my dad|for the first time 5 days ago. {78042}{78102}I was partially|frozen his whole life. {78120}{78208}That is beautiful that|you can admit to that. {78210}{78290}He comes back and... and now he wants|me to take over the family business. {78292}{78380}But, Scott, who's gonna|take over the world when I die? {78385}{78410}Listen to the words he used: {78412}{78484}"Who's going to take over|the world when I die?" {78490}{78560}It feels like that to some|of us sometimes, doesn't it? {78565}{78585}Mhm. Mhm. Yes. Yes. {78590}{78660}So, what do you want to do, Scott? {78670}{78740}I don't know. I was|thinking I like animals. {78745}{78770}Maybe I'd be a vet. {78772}{78800}An evil vet? {78810}{78835}No. {78840}{78875}Maybe like work in a petting zoo. {78877}{78913}An evil petting zoo? {78920}{78960}You always do that! {78970}{79020}What? What? I... {79035}{79080}I just think like he hates me. {79082}{79130}I really think|he wants to kill me. {79132}{79155}Now, Scott {79157}{79205}we don't want to|kill each other in here. {79207}{79310}We might say that we|do sometimes but we really don't. {79335}{79365}Actually, the|boy's quite astute. {79367}{79465}I really am trying to kill him,|but, so far, unsuccessfully. {79467}{79520}He's quite wily,|like his old man. {79585}{79625}This is what I'm talking about. {79635}{79710}Okay. Well. We've|heard from you, Scott. {79712}{79795}Now er... you tell us|a little about yourself. {79797}{79885}The details of my life|are quite inconsequential. {79890}{79973}Oh, no. Please, please.|Let... Let's hear about your childhood. {79975}{80040}Yeah. Come on. Come on. {80075}{80145}Very well. Where do I begin? {80165}{80270}My father was a relentlessly self-improving|boulangerie owner from Belgium... {80272}{80356}with low-grade narcolepsy|and a penchant for buggery. {80365}{80480}My mother was a 15-year-old French|prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. {80497}{80565}My father would womanize,|he would drink. {80572}{80670}He would make outrageous claims|like he invented the question mark. {80677}{80760}Sometimes he would accuse|chestnuts of being lazy... {80772}{80916}the sort of general malaise that only the|genius possess and the insane lament. {80932}{80984}My childhood was typical... {80995}{81075}summers in Rangoon,|luge lessons. {81080}{81140}In the spring, we'd|make meat helmets. {81147}{81250}When I was insolent I was placed in|a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. {81252}{81304}Pretty standard, really. {81317}{81380}At the age of 12,|I received my first scribe. {81385}{81460}At the age of 14,|a Zoroastrian named Vilma... {81462}{81530}ritualistically|shaved my testicles. {81540}{81610}There really is nothing|like a shorn scrotum. {81612}{81683}It's breathtaking.|I suggest you try it. {81685}{81745}You know, we have to stop. {81785}{81810}Austin, can I|have a word with you? {81812}{81840}Of course you may, luv. {81915}{81970}Look, I know I'm being neurotic, but... {81975}{82065}I can't shake off this suspicious|feeling about that Italian secretary. {82067}{82098}You know, Miss Fagina. {82108}{82160}And I don't want|to sound paranoid but... {82163}{82225}I've had some bad|relationships in the past and... {82230}{82285}I have been known|to be jealous. {82287}{82308}I'm sorry. {82310}{82360}No, don't be sorry, baby. {82365}{82410}You're right to be suspicious. {82415}{82450}I shagged her. {82458}{82480}What? {82482}{82542}I shagged her rotten,|baby! Yeah! {82555}{82635}I don't believe you, Austin.|She was repellent. {82640}{82690}Saucer of milk, table two. {82703}{82735}But did you use protection? {82737}{82813}'Course. I had|my nine-millimeter automatic. {82820}{82886}You know I meant|did you use a condom? {82890}{82975}No. Only sailors|use condoms, baby. {82980}{83017}Not in the nineties, Austin. {83019}{83090}Well, they should, those filthy beggars.|They go from port to port. {83100}{83160}What? Vanessa,|don't have a thrombo. {83162}{83213}Alotta meant nothing to me. {83215}{83255}Well, it means something to me. {83270}{83305}Austin, if you want us|to have a relationship... {83307}{83388}you have to get it into your|head that times have changed. {83390}{83445}You can't just go off|shagging anybody anymore. {83443}{83518}And if you could, I wouldn't,|because I'm not like that. {83535}{83565}Vanessa! {83625}{83665}You're everything to me. {83675}{83715}You just don't get it, do you? {83770}{83805}Good night, Austin. {83807}{83855}Welcome to the nineties. {83865}{83900}You're gonna be very lonely. {84440}{84495}Hey! Hey. Check this guy out. {84545}{84580}Peace. Peace. {84730}{84790}Jimi Hendrix...deceased. {84800}{84830}Drugs. {84845}{84875}Janis Joplin. {84900}{84925}Deceased. {84927}{84950}Alcohol. {84952}{84980}Mama Cass. {84995}{85020}Deceased. {85027}{85075}Ham sandwich. {85707}{85773}Alright. That's great.|Is the lighting halfway decent? {85780}{85822}Yes, indeed.|They got the flag up now. {85824}{85865}You can see|the stars and stripes. {85870}{85915}Beautiful. Just beautiful. {85910}{85945}-Zugabe! {85950}{85985}-Zugabe! {85990}{86025}-Zugabe! {86030}{86060}-Zugabe!|-Good morning, Austin. {86110}{86185}You know, I sometimes forget|you've missed out on the last 30 years. {86215}{86252}Fall of the Berlin Wall... {86265}{86313}the first female|British Prime Minister... {86320}{86355}end of apartheid. {86365}{86430}Yeah, and I can't believe|Liberace was gay. {86440}{86530}I mean, women loved him.|I didn't see that one coming. No. {86560}{86590}The tour is about to begin... {86592}{86633}so if you'll please|take your seats... {86650}{86720}Welcome to Virtucon,|company of the future. {86725}{86775}Virtucon is a|leading manufacturer {86777}{86840}of many items you can find|right in your very own home. {86842}{86877}Do you think|she's prettier than me? {86885}{86902}Who? {86908}{86936}You know who. {86945}{87045}Oh, the Italian bird.|No, baby. She's rancid. {87055}{87158}I think you're shagadelic, baby.|You're switched on. You're smashing. {87160}{87265}We make steel, petroleum|products and volatile chemicals. {87267}{87345}But don't worry|about the Italian bird, okay? {87350}{87390}She's the village bicycle. {87395}{87440}Everyone's had a ride. {87442}{87473}...you're using a|Virtucon product. {87475}{87580}On your right, you'll notice|a door leading to a restricted area. {87582}{87630}Only authorized|personnel are allowed... {87632}{87660}I'll take him. {87670}{87700}You take her. {88075}{88100}Let's go. {88240}{88265}Ah, er... look, it's a guard. {88270}{88333}What are we going to do? We don't|look anything like our photo-badges. {88335}{88365}Don't worry, baby. {88375}{88460}I learned a mind-control|technique during my travels to India. {88462}{88500}I learned it from my Guru. {88502}{88545}The late Guru Shastry. {88547}{88595}A chased man who died mysteriously {88597}{88670}with disease that had|all the hall marks of syphilis. {88672}{88700}Alright. Watch me. {88720}{88740}Hi, folks. {88745}{88766}You're entering a restricted zone. {88768}{88820}I'm gonna have to see|some identification, please. {88822}{88855}Sure! {88922}{88990}There seems to be|some sort of a problem. {88997}{89090}Everything seems to be in order. {89130}{89222}Everything seems to be in order. {89225}{89272}It's fantastic, Austin.|Come on, let's go. {89295}{89435}I'm going to go across the street|and get you some orange sherbet. {89445}{89565}I'm going to go across the street|and get you some orange sherbet. {89567}{89595}Austin, let's go. {89617}{89695}Here, have a piece of gum. {89702}{89773}Here, have a piece of gum. {89775}{89813}Do you mind if I do? {89815}{89850}Austin, let's go now. {89930}{89995}It's Bolton.|We've got a problem. {89997}{90040}Intruders in the complex. {90045}{90085}Intruders in the complex. {90090}{90115}Watch out. {90140}{90185}-Halt.|-This way. {90205}{90230}Judo chop! {90315}{90345}They're coming! {90350}{90390}Hang on. I'm going to floor it. {90395}{90430}Watch out. Move! {90435}{90460}Move! Move! {90520}{90550}Careful, Austin. {90560}{90660}NOOOOO! {90665}{90700}-Watch out!|-Watch out! {90705}{90771}NOOOOO! {90773}{90800}Watch out! {90802}{90860}NOOOOO! {90861}{90911}AAAH! {90913}{90960}NAAAH! {90963}{90990}NAAAH! {91185}{91210}Hello? {91212}{91265}Yes. This is Mrs. Harvin. {91280}{91305}Yes. {91307}{91390}My husband is a henchman|in Dr. Evil's private army. {91397}{91420}What? {91425}{91460}Oh my God! {91465}{91510}Thanks for calling. {91595}{91620}Hi, Mom. {91635}{91665}Sit down, Billy. {91675}{91715}I've got some bad news. {91735}{91810}Your stepfather was run|over by a steamroller. {91812}{91905}But Mom, since Dad left,|Steve's been like a father to me. {91945}{91975}Honey. {92000}{92095}People never think how things|effect the family of a henchman. {92200}{92240}Oh, thank goodness|we made it, Austin. {92245}{92305}-Alright, stay very cool, baby.|-Okay. {92900}{92950}Mr. Powers. {92960}{93025}Welcome to my underground lair. {93030}{93065}You're just in time. {93075}{93110}Enjoy the show. {93265}{93330}Gentlemen,|I give you the Vulcan... {93360}{93445}the world's most powerful|subterranean drill. {93452}{93495}Does that make you horny? {93500}{93535}Not now, Austin. {93540}{93605}So powerful, it can penetrate|the earth's crust... {93610}{93725}delivering a 50-kiloton nuclear warhead|deep into the liquid hot core of the planet. {93727}{93855}Upon detonation, every volcano|on earth will erupt. {93930}{94005}It seems we have no choice|but to pay your ransom. {94015}{94085}You have my instructions.|Bye-bye. {94145}{94215}Check it out, Butt-head.|This chick has three boobs. {94260}{94300}How many butts does she have? {94470}{94560}Do you like your|quasi-futuristic clothes, Mr. Powers? {94565}{94610}I designed them myself. {94980}{95000}Scott! {95005}{95040}Scott, my boy, how are you? {95065}{95090}How was your day? {95095}{95158}Well, my friend Sweet Jay took me|in that video arcade in town, right? {95160}{95230}And they don't speak English there,|so Jay got into a fight and he's all: {95232}{95295}"Hey, quit hassling me 'cause|I don't speak French or whatever." {95297}{95340}And then the guy says|something in Paris talk... {95342}{95380}and I'm like: "Just back off." {95382}{95412}And they're all: "Get out." {95414}{95446}And we're like: "Make me." {95465}{95495}It was cool. {95520}{95550}Fascinating. {95555}{95595}What are your plans|for this evening? {95600}{95625}I thought I'd stay in. {95630}{95680}There's a good titty|movie on Skinimax. {95682}{95755}And that's how you'd like|to live your life, is it? {95760}{95790}Yeah. {95815}{95855}-Pretty much worth.|-What? {95857}{95885}Yeah. Okay. {95940}{95965}Ow! {96030}{96055}Scott... {96060}{96200}I want you to meet Daddy's|nemesis Austin Powers. {96208}{96275}Are you feeding him?|Why don't you just kill him? {96280}{96340}No, Scott. I have an even better idea. {96350}{96418}I'm going to place him in|an easily escapable situation... {96420}{96495}involving an overly|elaborate and exotic death. {96530}{96565}Why don't you|just shoot him now? {96575}{96615}I mean, I'll go get a gun.|We'll shoot him together. {96617}{96685}It'll be fun. Bang!|Dead. Done. {96687}{96780}One more peep out of you and you are|grounded, mister and I am not joking. {96860}{96895}All right. Let's begin. {96910}{97000}Dr. Evil, do you really|expect them to pay? {97005}{97050}No, Mr. Powers. {97070}{97140}I expect them to die. {97170}{97205}Even after they|pay me the money... {97207}{97260}I'm still gonna melt|every city on the planet... {97262}{97310}with liquid hot magma. {97375}{97410}Release the sharks! {97415}{97470}Mr. Powers, you'll notice|that all the sharks... {97472}{97525}have laser beams|attached to their heads. {97527}{97600}I figure every creature|deserves a warm meal. {97665}{97740}Dr. Evil, it's about the sharks. {97750}{97790}When you were frozen... {97795}{97850}they were put on the| endangered species list. {97855}{97960}We tried to get some but it would've|taken months to clear up the red tape. {97980}{98050}You know, I have one simple request... {98060}{98180}and that is to have sharks with frickin'|laser beams attached to their heads! {98190}{98305}Now, evidently, my cycloptic colleague|informs me that that can't be done. {98315}{98380}Er... Can you remind me|what I pay you people for? {98382}{98436}Honestly, throw me a bone here. {98450}{98485}What do we have? {98500}{98530}Sea bass. {98618}{98660}Right. {98670}{98740}They are mutated sea bass. {98750}{98815}Really? Are they ill-tempered? {98817}{98843}Absolutely. {98845}{98890}That's a start.|You know. That's something. {98900}{98920}All right, guard... {98922}{99000}begin the unnecessarily|slow-moving dipping mechanism. {99065}{99100}Close the tank! {99140}{99185}Why? Are... Aren't you|even gonna watch them? {99190}{99220}They could get away. {99222}{99265}No, no, no. I'm going|to leave them alone... {99267}{99315}and not actually|witness them dying. {99317}{99365}I'm just gonna assume|it all went to plan. What? {99405}{99445}I have a gun in my room. {99447}{99490}You give me five|seconds, I'll get it. {99492}{99572}I'll come back down here, boom!|I'll blow their brains out. {99580}{99620}Scott... {99630}{99690}You just don't get it, do you? {99695}{99722}You don't. {99760}{99790}-It's no hassle.|-Shh! {99810}{99820}-But...|-Shh! {99825}{99840}-I'm...|-Shh! {99865}{99890}-All I'm say...|-Shh! {99900}{99922}-They're gonna get awa...|-Shh! {99940}{99950}-I...|-Shh! {99955}{99974}-I'm just...|-Shh! {99978}{99988}-We...|-Shh! {99992}{100000}-We sh...|-Shh! {100010}{100030}Knock knock. {100032}{100050}-Who's there?|-Shh! {100085}{100105}-Look...|Shh! {100115}{100165}Let me tell you a little story|about a man named "shh!" {100167}{100190}Shh! {100192}{100285}Even before you start,|that was a preemptive "shh!" {100290}{100370}Just know I have a whole bag|of "shh" with your name on it. {100510}{100540}What's your plan? {100545}{100610}First, I plan to soil myself... {100615}{100675}then I'm going to regroup|and come up with a new plan. {100680}{100710}Any thoughts? {100725}{100755}Wait a minute. {100795}{100835}I always have this with me,|just in case. {100837}{100930}Okay. I get it. I have bad teeth. {100945}{101030}No, Austin. The floss is to|swing ourselves onto the ledge. {101040}{101110}Oh. All right. Hold on. {101170}{101253}Got it. Okay. Toothpaste. Hello? {101345}{101375}Judo chop! {101430}{101455}Hang on! {101685}{101720}Judo trip. {101795}{101820}No! {102100}{102162}Not a good time|to lose one's head. {102165}{102190}Indeed. {102220}{102270}That's not the way|to get ahead in life. {102272}{102300}No. {102330}{102390}It's a shame he|wasn't more headstrong. {102435}{102500}He'll never be the|head of a major corporation. {102502}{102525}Okay. That'll do. {102527}{102550}Okay. {102760}{102785}Help me, guys! {102790}{102815}Guys, come on. {102820}{102910}Can you believe John Smith|is getting married tomorrow? {102912}{102935}I can't. {102937}{103000}Where's Smitty anyway? It's... it's...|it's not like him to be late for anything. {103002}{103040}Especially's on stag party. {103042}{103105}Well, you know he works|as a henchman for Dr. Evil. {103107}{103150}Sometimes they work late. {103163}{103245}You know, can I just say|something that may sound a little... {103250}{103275}sappy? {103285}{103330}I think it is such a tribute {103332}{103375}to our buddy, John Smith,... {103380}{103460}that so many of his friends|showed up to honour him today. {103470}{103505}There's a lot of|love in this room. {103507}{103535}Hear, hear! {103615}{103640}Hi! {103642}{103705}I have a phone call|for the John-Smith-party. {103707}{103745}Oh. Yeah, I get it. {103850}{103880}He's dead? {103910}{103980}Decapitated by an|ill-tempered mutated sea bass? {104055}{104080}Yes. {104090}{104110}Okay. {104155}{104180}What's wrong? {104185}{104250}What happened? Was that|John? Is he coming late? {104305}{104345}John Smith won't be coming. {104347}{104370}Why not? {104380}{104450}He was decapitated by an|ill-tempered mutated sea bass. {104455}{104490}Oh my God! {104505}{104540}Are you kidding me? {104550}{104575}To Smitty! {104595}{104620}To Smitty! {104735}{104775}No! What are we gonna do? {104785}{104840}Oh! Look. There's an|emergency exit. Go get help. {104842}{104905}I'm gonna stay here|and keep an eye on Dr. Evil. {104915}{104960}Okay. I'll hurry back. {105007}{105050}Listen, Vanessa. {105100}{105130}Whatever happens, {105150}{105260}I want you to know that I feel|really bad about that Italian bird. {105305}{105340}What I'm trying to say is... {105370}{105430}that if you want me|to be a one-woman man... {105445}{105500}well, that's just groovy, baby. {105530}{105570}Behave. {106448}{106475}Come, everyone. {106485}{106540}Let us repair|to the main chamber. {106570}{106635}Project Vulcan|is about to begin. {106720}{106795}Scott? Don't you want to see|what Daddy does for a living? {106805}{106850}-Blow me.|-Excuse me? {106870}{106895}Show me. {106935}{106960}Okay. {107225}{107275}Position the Vulcan. {107625}{107670}Bring in the warhead. {108370}{108410}Hello, hello! {108415}{108480}Hello, Mr. Powers! {108490}{108560}Care to have a little fun? {108565}{108660}No, actually I er...|I have to save the world. {108915}{108945}Is it cold in here? {109350}{109395}Arm the probe. {109795}{109880}No! No! No! I've|got to get Dr. Evil! {109890}{109925}I've got to get Dr. Evil! {109927}{109945}No! No! No! Er... {109955}{110020}Baseball, er... cold showers. {110025}{110055}Baseball, cold showers. {110060}{110090}Give it up, Mr. Powers. {110092}{110155}Margaret Thatcher|naked on a cold day. {110160}{110215}Margaret Thatcher|naked on a cold day. {110245}{110270}Gentlemen. {110365}{110410}Let's lock and load. {110412}{110480}Right, lads. Alright! Move,| move, move! Let's go! {110495}{110522}-Don't go.|-Stay with us. {110524}{110560}Please don't go. {110590}{110637}You can't resist us, Mr. Powers. {110645}{110690}You can't resist us, Mr. Powers. {110710}{110750}Au contraire, baby. {110752}{110805}I think you can't resist me. {110832}{110930}~You're the one who|makes me come running~ {110935}{111030}~You're the sun who|makes me shine~ {111035}{111130}~When you're around|I'm always laughing~ {111140}{111220}~I wanna make you mine.~ {111230}{111280}~I close my eyes~ {111290}{111340}~and see you before me~ {111342}{111380}~I think I would die~ {111382}{111440}~If you were to ignore me~ {111442}{111480}~A fool could see~ {111482}{111540}~just how much I adore you~ {111542}{111585}~I get down on my knees~ {111587}{111655}~I do anything for you~ {111690}{111785}~I don't want anybody else~ {111790}{111880}~When I think about you|I touch myself~ {111885}{111935}~Oh, I don't want~ {111940}{111985}~anybody else~ {111990}{112065}~oh no, oh no, oh no~ {112110}{112175}~I want you. I don't|want anybody else~ {112200}{112235}~And when I think about you~ {112240}{112305}~I touch myself, ooh~ {112390}{112495}~I don't want anybody else~ {112500}{112590}~when I think about|you, I touch myself~ {112600}{112705}~Oh, and I don't|want anybody else~ {112715}{112790}~When I think about|you, I touch myself~ {112795}{112845}~I touch myself~ {112860}{112890}Austin? {112895}{112940}Vanessa? Er... {112945}{112990}It... it's not what it seems. {113035}{113060}At ease, boys. {113062}{113090}Likewise. {113130}{113155}Vanessa, I can explain. {113160}{113245}See, what happened was er...|I broke in trying to get to Dr. Evil. {113250}{113285}Then all of a sudden,|the fembots came by... {113287}{113340}and smoke started to come|out of their jumblies. {113342}{113415}So I thought I'd work my mojo, right?|To counter their mojo. {113420}{113490}We got cross-mojonations, and|their heads started exploding. {113492}{113580}You know, that thing, and I ended|up in my knickers here and then... {113635}{113680}Okay, Austin. I believe you. {113682}{113710}Now get dressed. {113712}{113750}Smashing, baby. {113775}{113805}Onward, boys. {113915}{113985}Launching the|subterranean probe. {114080}{114155}Begin initial|surface penetration. {114245}{114360}Subterranean nuclear detonation|in three minutes and counting. {114590}{114620}Watch out! {114710}{114735}~There's a man~| {114736}{114785}~who leads a life of danger~|-Right Back! {114786}{114800}~who leads a life of danger~| {114801}{114855}-Subterranean nuclear detonation in three {114856}{114910}~To everyone he meets~|-minutes and counting. {114911}{114980}~he stays a stranger~ {115000}{115055}~With every move he makes~ {115060}{115130}~another chance he takes~ {115155}{115165}~odds are he won't live~| {115166}{115193}~odds are he won't live~|-Oh, I tripped! Ow! Ow! Ow! {115194}{115230}~to see tomorrow.~| {115231}{115245}~to see tomorrow.~|-Open the frickin' door! {115246}{115270}|-Open the frickin' door! {115271}{115370}~Secret agent man! Secret agent man!~| {115371}{115425}~Secret agent man! Secret agent man!~|-Probe destruction beginning in... {115427}{115468}~They've giving you a number~|-Judo! Judo! {115469}{115485}~They've giving you a number~|-Ten! {115486}{115498}~And taken away your name~|-Ten! {115499}{115521}~And taken away your name~|-Nine! {115522}{115551}~And taken away your name~|-Eight! {115552}{115580}-Seven! {115605}{115625}-Six! {115635}{115665}-Five! {115670}{115700}-Four! {115702}{115730}-Three! {115735}{115765}-Two! {115775}{115800}-One! {115815}{115900}NOOOOO! {115970}{115995}Abort. {116005}{116025}Abort. {116040}{116060}Abort. {116075}{116095}Abort. {116110}{116130}Abort. {116145}{116165}Abort. {116175}{116215}Now to Dr. Evil. {116240}{116275}Din-din. {116300}{116360}I want chicken, I want liver. {116365}{116430}Meow Mix, Meow Mix,|please deliver. {116455}{116505}I've got you now, Dr. Evil. {116538}{116598}Well done, Mr. Powers. {116615}{116680}We're not so different,|you and I. {116710}{116830}However, isn't it ironic,|the very things you stand for... {116850}{116995}free love, swinging parties,|are all now in the nineties... {117005}{117040}considered to be... {117080}{117120}evil? {117130}{117165}No, man, what we swingers {117167}{117240}were rebelling against|is uptight squares like you {117242}{117360}whose bag was money and world|domination. We were innocent, man. {117365}{117445}If we'd known the consequences|of our sexual liberation... {117450}{117550}we would have done things differently|but the spirit would've remained the same. {117543}{117611}It's freedom, baby. Yeah. {117617}{117650}Face it. {117660}{117695}Freedom failed. {117705}{117750}No, man, freedom didn't fail. {117760}{117895}Right now, we've got freedom and|responsibility. It's a very groovy time. {117905}{117990}There's nothing more pathetic|than an aging hipster. {117995}{118055}All right, baldy.|Shut your cakehole. {118060}{118095}Come on. Let's go.|On your bike. {118115}{118170}-No!|-Not so fast. {118172}{118250}It seems the tables|have turned, Mr. Powers. {118255}{118315}Go ahead, Austin.|Don't worry about me. {118320}{118370}Hey, I can take|my Sega, right, Dad? {118395}{118475}It seems the tables|have turned again, Dr. Evil. {118477}{118550}Not really. Kill the little|bastard. See what I care. {118555}{118610}But, Dad, we just had|a breakthrough in group. {118612}{118700}I had the group liquidated, you|little shit. They were insolent. {118720}{118755}I hate you! I hate you! {118760}{118815}I wish I was never|artificially created in a lab. {118820}{118890}Oh, Scott, that hurts Daddy|when you say that, honestly. {118925}{118975}Ah. Number Two. {118980}{119060}Your timing is impeccable.|Go ahead. Take Mr. Powers away. {119090}{119120}No! {119135}{119150}What? {119152}{119190}Dr. Evil... {119205}{119260}I've spent|30 years of my life... {119262}{119365}turning this two-bit evil empire|into a world-class multinational. {119375}{119440}I was going to have|a cover story in Forbes. {119450}{119525}But, you, like an idiot,|wanted to take over the world... {119527}{119595}and you don't realize|there is no world anymore. {119600}{119635}It's only corporations. {119637}{119695}-Silence, Number Two!|-No! {119705}{119770}I've had enough of you|pushing me around. {119855}{119880}Mr. Powers... {119885}{119955}I have a business proposition|you might find very interesting. {120000}{120045}Right. I've had enough. {120160}{120195}Judo chop! {120260}{120325}The complex will self-destruct. {120460}{120500}Come on! Let's split! Let's go! {120555}{120590}This place is going to blow! {120690}{120720}We must go! {120845}{120895}I bought you your orange shirbirt. {120897}{120925}Thank you! {121035}{121085}The complex will self-destruct. {121135}{121170}Come on, let's go! {121255}{121310}The complex will self-destruct. {121335}{121360}This way, Austin. {121362}{121410}Come on, baby! It's|gonna blow! Let's go. {121415}{121440}Move it! {121455}{121500}Allez-hop! {121505}{121590}Oooooh! {121595}{121630}Uuh! {122358}{122415}I love you, Mr. Powers. {122417}{122495}And I love you, Mrs. Powers. {122560}{122605}Oh, that'll be Basil Exposition. {122630}{122675}Oh, ignore it, Austin.|Come back to bed. {122677}{122722}Duty calls, baby. {122803}{122840}Hello, Austin. {122850}{122940}Oh, I er... I hope I'm not|interrupting your honeymoon. {122945}{122990}No, not at all, Basil. {122995}{123045}Did you get that|fruit basket I sent you? {123052}{123100}Yes, we did, Basil,|but you sent too much. {123105}{123145}I'm gonna have|to send some to my mother. {123165}{123220}Oh, don't forget these. {123222}{123265}-Oh, thanks.|-There you go. {123275}{123320}Did you get my other gift? {123322}{123350}We did. {123355}{123410}Yes, Basil, nice rack. {123430}{123495}But who in the world|gave us this drawing? {123497}{123530}It's bizarre. {123540}{123633}Well, as you know, Dr. Evil|has escaped in his rocket... {123635}{123695}which has disappeared|from our tracking system. {123700}{123730}Oh dear. Hold on. Coffee? {123735}{123765}-Oh, yes, please.|-Okay. Thank you. {123805}{123840}Oh, and, Vanessa, by the way, {123842}{123905}you have been made a full agent. {123908}{123965}Oh, that's fantastic, Basil! Thanks. {123967}{123995}Milk? {123997}{124020}Yes, please. {124035}{124080}And, Austin, Her Majesty|the Queen informs me... {124082}{124150}that you are to be knighted. {124152}{124185}Very shagadelic! {124190}{124246}Well, the best of luck|to both of you! {124255}{124330}I can't believe that|you are married, Austin. {124335}{124380}Oh, what a lovely pair. {124382}{124410}Thanks, Basil. {124412}{124465}I think I'm gonna like|living in the nineties. {124467}{124520}-Bye-bye.|-Good-bye. {124530}{124565}You know, Vanessa... {124570}{124630}I'll never forget|the first time I saw you. {124645}{124700}You were so|incredibly beautiful... {124735}{124790}so incredibly sexy... {124810}{124855}I knew I had to have you... {124880}{124925}right then and there. {124975}{125040}Did you feel the same way? {125045}{125095}Actually, I couldn't stop|staring at your teeth. {125105}{125130}Oh. {125170}{125245}Oh, I ordered some champagne.|Come in! {125255}{125285}Oh, lovely, Austin. {125287}{125327}Right over there's fine.|Thank you. {125329}{125410}Let's go out on the terrace. It's a|beautiful night. We can look at the stars. {125430}{125550}Smashing idea, baby.|Yeah. Look at you. {125585}{125610}Look out! {125640}{125675}Ow! {125690}{125740}That really hurt! {125755}{125810}I'm gonna have a|lump there, you idiot. {125820}{125890}Who throws a shoe?|Honestly. {125910}{125955}You fight like a woman. {126430}{126455}Austin! {126500}{126555}Honestly, it's not mine. {126560}{126600}No! Use it. {127010}{127040}Smashing! {127175}{127215}~I will never know~ {127216}{127273}~cause you will never show~ {127275}{127330}~come on and love me now~|-Look how beautiful the night sky is. {127331}{127339}~come on and love me now~| {127340}{127375}~come on and love me now~|Hey! Isn't that the Big Dipper? {127376}{127390}~I will never know~| {127391}{127425}~I will never know~|Yeah, and that looks just like Uranus. {127426}{127455}~cause you will never show~|Yeah, and that looks just like Uranus. {127426}{127475}~cause you will never show~| {127476}{127495}~cause you will never show~|-Austin! {127496}{127520}~come on and love me now~|-Well, you know... {127521}{127534}~come on and love me now~| {127535}{127585}Hey, I've never seen|that big star before. {127587}{127620}No, what is that? {127695}{127725}Good God. {127850}{127915}I'm gonna get you,|Austin Powers. {127935}{128015}It's frickin' freezing|in here, Mr. Bigglesworth. {128185}{128295}~Austin Powers,|he's the man for you~ {128475}{128620}~Austin Powers~ {128725}{128785}Darling, you look|fabulous. Okay, baby. {128815}{128840}All right. There we go. {128842}{128890}Look at that face.|Coming in. Come on. {128892}{128930}There. Bit of hair.|Bit of hair. {128930}{128960}~I'm through with love hangovers~|-Smashing. {128961}{128964}~I'm through with love hangovers~| {128965}{128990}~I'm through with love hangovers~|-Okay. It's coming around now. {128991}{129015}~It's best that I stay sober~|-Okay. It's coming around now. {129016}{129036}~It's best that I stay sober~|-Coming around, yes. {129037}{129070}~No rolling in the clover~|-Yes, great! {129072}{129089}~No rolling in the clover~|-Yes. Yes. Yes! {129090}{129114}~No Gretna Green trip over~|-Yes. Yes. Yes! {129115}{129143}~No Gretna Green trip over~|-No! No! No! {129145}{129175}~No honeymoon in Paris~|-No, it's not working! {129176}{129184}~No honeymoon in Paris~| {129185}{129195}~No honeymoon in Paris~|-Go change. There you go. {129196}{129215}~I only feel embarrassed~|-Go change. There you go. {129216}{129235}~I only feel embarrassed~|-Can you change her? Can you? Can you? {129236}{129275}~For the cool cats~|-Is that okay? Is that all right? {129277}{129310}~For the cool cats~|-Very good. Very good. {129311}{129330}~The charmed kittens~|-Very good. Very good. {129331}{129349}~The charmed kittens~| {129350}{129360}~The charmed kittens~|-And right here. Looking right there. {129361}{129405}~Both smitten by the love songs~|-And right here. Looking right there. {129406}{129424}~Both smitten by the love songs~| {129425}{129450}~That he's written~|-I'm not even looking. {129451}{129464}~That he's written~| {129465}{129495}~Caught in the sights~|-Oh, you're wicked! {129496}{129510}~Caught in the sights~|-You got your mojo working overtime, darling. Yeah. {129511}{129565}~Of a deadly sniper~|-You got your mojo working overtime, darling. Yeah. {129566}{129569}~Of a deadly sniper~| {129570}{129630}~The magic piper of love~|-Look, I'm not even shooting it. It's insane. {129631}{129634}~The magic piper of love~| {129635}{129639}~The magic piper of love~|-Smashing. {129640}{129660}|-Smashing. {129670}{129680}|-Come on. Can I get a smile? {129681}{129710}~The magic piper of love~|-Come on. Can I get a smile? {129711}{129724}~The magic piper of love~| {129725}{129746}~The magic piper of love~|-Okay. Come on. {129747}{129765}|-Come on, you boys. Get together. Come on. {129766}{129805}~Of love~|-Come on, you boys. Get together. Come on. {129816}{129842}~Of love~| {129855}{129880}Okay. Good. Lovin' it. {129882}{129925}Let's make a Vanessa sandwich. {129927}{129955}The winged horn. The winged horn. {129960}{130025}Come on, Austin.|Give it to me. Go. Go. {130040}{130080}~Now there is no simple way~|-Oh, behave. {130081}{130089}~Now there is no simple way~| {130090}{130110}~Now there is no simple way~|-Okay. You're an animal! {130111}{130130}~To change the things~|-Okay. You're an animal! {130131}{130165}~To change the things~|-An animal! Yes. {130166}{130190}~that I have been~|-An animal! Yes. {130191}{130205}~that I have been~| {130206}{130274}~You cannot just cage a bird~| {130275}{130304}~You cannot just cage a bird~|-Yes! That's it. Ya! {130305}{130355}~And expect it to fly free~|-Ya, ya, ya, ya. {130356}{130400}~And expect it to fly free~|-Just the top of the hair. That's all I want. {130402}{130432}|-Born and shoot. {130434}{130460}~Now there is a sorrow~|-Again. Try it one more time. {130461}{130505}~Now there is a sorrow~|-And I'm born and shoot. {130506}{130525}~That always comes my way~|-And I'm born and shoot. {130526}{130560}~That always comes my way~|-That's it. Yeah. {130561}{130590}~That always comes my way~|-Let's go. Come on. Come on. Come on. {130591}{130605}~But you never really know~|-Let's go. Come on. Come on. Come on. {130606}{130634}~But you never really know~| {130635}{130655}~But you never really know~|-Ignore this. Ignore this. {130656}{130675}~you never really know~|-Ignore this. Ignore this. {130676}{130710}~you never really know~|Ignore me doing this. {130711}{130766}~Watch out. Someone's gonna get me~| {130767}{130800}~I know it's never gonna let me~| {130801}{130819}~I know it's never gonna let me~|-Fabulous, darling. {130820}{130830}~That's just~|-Fabulous, darling. {130831}{130899}~the way it tends to be these days~| {130900}{130944}~I try, it's never gonna let me~| {130945}{130965}~I try, it's never gonna let me~|-Go! Go! Go! {130966}{130980}~I wish~|-Go! Go! Go! {130981}{131020}~that it wouldn't come and get me~| {131021}{131109}~That's just the way|it tends to be these days~ {131110}{131145}|-Lord! Lord! {131146}{131155}~These days~|-Lord! Lord! {131156}{131195}~These days~| {131200}{131210}~These days~| {131211}{131245}~These days~|-Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes! {131246}{131270}~These days~|-Okay. Show me eye. {131300}{131350}Yes! Yes! Yes! {131352}{131400}No! No! No! {131405}{131455}Never get up. I'm spent! {131480}{131525}We'll take you, and|we'll go out on the town... {131530}{131595}and swing, baby. Yeah! {131750}{131780}~Missis~ {131815}{131840}~Will ya~ {131865}{131900}~Make me tea?~ {131935}{131970}~Make love to me~ {132000}{132040}~Put on the telly~ {132065}{132110}~To the BBC?~ {132130}{132220}~To the BBC? Yeah, yeah, yeah!~ {132222}{132340}~BBC One. BBC Two.|BBC Three. BBC Four.~ {132342}{132435}~BBC Five. BBC Six. BBC Seven.~ {132440}{132480}~BBC heaven.~ {132515}{132545}~Missis~ {132575}{132610}~Will ya~ {132640}{132670}~Make me tea?~ {132705}{132740}~Make love to me~ {132770}{132810}~Put on the telly~ {132825}{132875}~To the BBC?~ {132900}{132980}~To the BBC? Yeah, yeah, yeah!~ {132987}{133110}~BBC One. BBC Two.|BBC Three. BBC Four.~ {133112}{133210}~BBC Five. BBC Six. BBC Seven.~ {133212}{133250}~BBC heaven.~ {133810}{133835}~Missis~ {133860}{133900}~Will ya~ {133930}{133960}~Make me tea?~ {134000}{134030}~Make love to me~ {134060}{134100}~Put on the telly~ {134125}{134170}~To the BBC?~ {134190}{134275}~To the BBC? Yeah, yeah, yeah!~ {134285}{134395}~BBC One. BBC Two.|BBC Three. BBC Four.~ {134400}{134495}~BBC Five. BBC Six. BBC Seven.~ {134497}{134550}~BBC heaven.~ {134555}{134600}~BBC peace.~ {135080}{135185}~A thousand thundering|thrills await me~ {135195}{135285}~Facing insurmountable|odds greatly~ {135295}{135440}~The female of the species|is more deadlier than the male~ {135515}{135610}~Shock, shock, horror, horror,|shock, shock, horror!~ {135615}{135720}~I'll shout myself hoarse|for your supernatural force!~ {135725}{135870}~The female of the species|is more deadlier than the male~ {135915}{136040}~Oh, she deals in witchcraft and~ {136045}{136105}~One kiss and...~77202