All language subtitles for Children.Ruin.Everything.S03E09.Leaving.the.House.1080p.NF.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H.264-FLUX_track3_[eng]

Mornings are tough.
There's not enough time

and if anything goes wrong,
you're late.

Who schedules a meeting
before school?

That is too early for
this sh... stuff.

Stuff, I said stuff.

It's not before school
anymore. Let's go, Felix.

I'll get him to class.
You start without me.

Okay. Okay, okay, let's go.
Oh, hi! We're here, hello.

Hi, Mrs. Berney,
I have to go teach now.

If you wanna discuss Viv's IEP
we could try tomorrow?

Yes, I know,
I'm-I'm so sorry, we

were stuck behind
a garbage truck.

Sometimes you're late
for reasons out of your control.

No, we forgot my lunch.

And sometimes
they're totally in your control

but you lost control
of being in control.

We did have to go back
because Viv forgot her lunch

and then I forgot my bag.

- I get it.

ADHD can be very challenging
when you're a parent.

Oh, no, no, no,
I don't have ADHD.

Right. Sorry,

I-I just assumed,
because it's 91% hereditary.

We could try any morning
before school.

- I'm trying now.
- Tomorrow is great.

We will be on time.

Come on, Viv,
let's get you to class

so I'm not late for work.

Viv, what are you doing?

Hey. Sorry I'm late.

What do I care?
I got here two minutes ago.

Look, the inside of my tie
has snails on it.

- Hmm.
- Your days are numbered, James!

- He's late every day!
- Hey, snitch!

- Uh--
- James stole a grocery cart

in college.
- Okay, this office

is a living body.
Ennis is the appendix.

I mean, no one knows what
he does but if we disturb him,

we'll all be poisoned.
- That is a huge compliment,

I bet.
- You're the heart, James.

And when the heart decides
not to work...

...it gets replaced.

They write songs
about hearts.

They throw appendixes
in the trash.

- Oh!
- Okay, shh, shh, come here.

Fintekoäly claims to be
implementing

their sales technology
but really,

they are here
to replace us with AI.

Oh, no, Marla, you're being
very paranoid-er than usual.

They are working
with Mr. Gero,

watching our asses,
determining who is expendable

and then...

...trimming the fat.

These people are
kinda nice in a weird,

Scandinavian way.
This rep right here,

he brought donuts today.
- Take one.

Okay, thank you.
Don't mind if I do.

Okay, they are totally
hitting it off.

Okay, come here.

- We're right here.
- Shh, shh, James.

Now, you two need to be working

like your lives depend on it.

When those Fintekoäly reps
report back

what a well-oiled
machine I'm running,

they won't dare touch us.
I have a hunch

that heads are gonna roll
in the east wing.

And when they do, we are gonna
take over their offices.

Ooh, that would be sweet.
There is a ping-pong
table over there.

- Send me east.
- It's like Canadian Google

in that east wing.
- Okay, get to work!

Am I supposed to actually
be worried about this?

About this?
Let me tell you something.

I worry about a lot of things.
My kids on the internet,

there's like 20 super volcanoes
right now that are overdue

to erupt. What I'm not
worried about

is Hans Cruller Andersen
over here.

- You are out of control.

Are you seeing this?

- Yeah, he's doing goggles.
- We love this guy!

Do nose!

Okay. Ooh!

Sorry I'm late,
but I can change.

What are you,
sleeping here now?

These aren't PJs.
They're vegan silk pants.

Hey, should I be apologizing
every time I'm late?

- Why start now?
- I think it's important

to forgive ourselves
when we're late

or we don't show up.
- Mm-hmm.

Or when we steal
something small.

Oh, hard agree.
Everybody's too fast

with labels, late, on time,
bad credit, handsome.

Tell me about it. Someone
just tried to label me ADHD.

Can you believe it? Me. Astrid.

Reliable Astrid.

I mean, my kid has it,
but not everybody has it.

Oh, we have it.

- You both have it?
- Yes.

My doctor diagnosed me.

I had to answer
15 questions, Astrid.

I did an online quiz.
Pretty compelling results.

That's not how
you diagnose ADHD,

that's how you diagnose which
Seinfeld character you are.

Elaine.

Get out!

Wait, do you know for sure
that you don't have it?

Uh, yeah. 99% sure.

- Oh.
- Why am I standing here?

Look at us,
getting a jump on tomorrow.

You setting an alarm?
- Signs of ADHD in women,

disorganization, forgetfulness,

problems listening.
Do any of these sound like me?

Well, I mean, you didn't
listen to me just a second ago.

You can't be objective.
You're in love with me.

You're head over heels.
Who could blame you?

Right, exactly. Oh, yeah.

How am I supposed
to know what I'm like?

I'm too busy doing things.
- What's all this about?

You think you passed it on?
What if I have ADHD

or rejection sensitivity
dysphoria

or an unruptured brain aneurysm?
- James, you don't have ADHD,

you have hypochondria.
- What? No, I don't.

Do I? I do.

Oh, what if that
is a symptom

of an underlying problem
that's even bigger?

Hello, we're on me right now,
okay? We're doing me?

Okay, look, what if neither
of us gave it to 'em?

I mean, they didn't inherit
everything from us.

Where did Felix get
his poor grasp of sarcasm

or his fussiness over textures?

Oh, my God. Dawn!

Oh, we're raising a mini Dawn.

Let's not spiral
about that now.

Let's-let's focus
on this time thing.

Okay, so I think if we can
adjust our mindset

to make early on time,

then we shouldn't have
a problem being late.

Right. Yeah, no, no,
that's it.

Now all we have to do
is explain the concept of time

to our children.

Thank you for coming.
We have to get Viv

to school on time
for her check-ins.

That means that we have to leave
this house by 7:45 AM.

Why is this table so smooth?

Well, 'cause I took
all the stuff off it

so we wouldn't be distracted.
Okay.

I've never seen
the whole table in my life.

I thought it was
a different colour.

Felix, stop pretending
not to recognize the table.

What's this thing?

What?

Oh, my God.

- Hmm.
- Is this table expandable?

I don't know. Oh.

Oh, my God!

That is so fun!

That's why the lady
at the garage sale sold me

that extra piece of wood!
It's just sitting in the shed.

Now there's enough room
for a puzzle and to have snacks.

Kids have a
lot of questions.

So much curiosity
and tiny attention spans.

They get distracted,
which means you get distracted.

And the more
you get distracted,

the less time you have
for stuff you hope to do.

Or want to do.
Or need to do.

Yeah, found the horn.

- It's called the corn.
- That's wrong.

Guys, focus on
the puzzle, please.

- Mm-mm.
- Wait, no, we got distracted

by the big table. We're supposed
to be coming up with a plan

to get to school on time.
- Yes, um...

- James?
- We pack our lunches

and we plan our outfits
and our meltdowns ahead of time,

Viv, not looking at you,
also looking at you.

I know, we can get a dog

so he can bark us awake
in the morning.

Or you guys could go to sleep
on time so you don't sleep in.

I could eat breakfast
super fast.

Yeah, but not like so fast,

right, because we don't
want you to choke.

- I know what I'm doing.
- Guys, we all need to work

together so we can get
to school for 8:00 AM.

We're doing this for Viv, right?
- That means no doing

our homework the day of.
We get outta bed

and we move out. Understood?

- Understood?

Understood.

♪ Where's your head at ♪

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Oh, come on,
I got syrup on me.

It's okay, that's okay,
we've made time for this.

Nobody panic.
- Just go upstairs,

get changed lickety-split.
I'm gonna grab Morris.

You get the car keys?
- Wait, no, I thought,

I thought you had the car keys?
- No, I gave you the car keys.

You have the car keys.
- Okay, now I'm panicking.

Okay, Felix, help us look
for the car keys, please. Okay?

Okay, uh,
what do they look like?

- They look like keys.
- Got it.

You come in the door.
You come in the door.

- Viv, hurry up!
- You remember what jacket
you were wearing?

- Uh, the green one?
- No, okay.

Focus. Focus on
finding the keys.

Let me just think.
Come in the door.

Yeah, found 'em!

Back on track, people.
No, Viv,

you can't wear
a costume to school.

Come on. Come on, hurry up.

You left them in the door.
Remember what they were saying

about forgetfulness and ADHD?

- Oh, gosh.

Okay. No, no, listen,
ten deep breaths, ready?

We do not have time
right now for a tantrum.

You know this. We do not--
- You're not the boss of me!

♪ Where's your head at ♪

Ah! Ow! Ah, oh!

- Hey, what's going on?
- I got gel in my eyes.

Okay, just flush it out.
Stop rubbing.

Ah! I'm blind!

No, no, no, stop.
Hey, hold still, hold still.

What's going on with you?

I slept with my ponytail
in to save time.

Now my neck is broken.

Uh, Felix, open your eyes
and let me help you flush it.

- Are we gonna be late again?
- Oh, absolutely.

Good morning.

What time is it? Oh, my God.

Oh, we're late.
The alarm didn't go off.

- Why didn't you wake us up?
- You just looked so peaceful.

Whew, hey. You ready?

I'm the problem.
I'm the reason why we're not

getting out on time.
- No, no,

we're all failing
together, honey.

No, I set the radio alarm
and it didn't go off.

- Well, that happens.
- My phone alarm also

didn't go off because I didn't
charge it and it died.

- My phone didn't go off either.
- I turned off your phone alarm

'cause I don't like
the sound of your alarm.

What's the matter
with my alarm sound?

- It's loud and annoying.
- It's an alarm.

Yeah, to wake up, James,
not for a Kaiju!

Is there a Kaiju coming? Kaiju!

I can't believe
you know the word Kaiju.

We're gonna be late.

We already missed
the meeting, right?

Well, we still have
to get to school.

And work. Yep, he's right.
Let's go, we're late.

Well, I did it
again. She strikes again!

She done done it.

Hey, Marla. Uh, just,
I'm sorry I'm late. The 427--

- I just visited the east wing.
- Yeah.

And those losers
got a catered breakfast

compliments of Fintekoäly.
- Uh...

Those reps were out there
smiling

and passing out paper plates.
- Uh-huh.

With tiny muffins
and croissants.

And melon.
But not that trash honeydew.

Fresh cantaloupe.

Hey, everybody,
there's a fancy breakfast
in the east wing.

Ay...

- Hey, geez.
- Marla, you gotta take it easy,

these are day-olds.
- Look at these snacks.

Generic crap.
Baggie's Buys Chips.

Oh, Baggie's Buys Granola Bars!

Baggie's Buys Fruit Snacks.

We um...
are the Baggie's Buys division.

I built Baggie's Buys.
Where are my tiny muffins?

Well, they're actually
right next to the smoked salmon.

I could go rustle you
up a plate if you'd like.

Fintekoäly needs to know
what we mean to Gero's Grocery.

I-I-If this is King's Landing,

we are the maester's
of the small council.

- I don't know what that means.
- I don't get that reference.

If Gero's Grocery
is Destiny's Child,

we are Beyoncé.

- That one I get, yeah.
- Okay, that one makes
sense to me.

Yeah, yeah. You want us
to make them say our name.

Or we won't be a survivor.
No, no, no, no, no.

Get to work
and be on time, time, time.

I'm just gonna have one
of these donuts real quick.

Anyone want some
fresh cantaloupe?

Okay. I guess I still
haven't tried cantaloupe.

There we go. Hey, dear!

- Thanks, Mom.
- Hi, Mom. Dawn.

You've turned into a purse.
- It's a sauna, smarty-pants.

I am increasing circulation
and releasing toxins.

You could borrow it
if your house

wasn't so cluttered and cramped.

You look like a big,
dumb hermit crab.

Speaking of my cluttered house,

Mom, did I show any signs
of ADHD when I was a kid?

Oh, please, everyone has
a problem these days.

You didn't have ADHD.
Sure, you were a daydreamer,

and a dawdler,
and a fussy pants, but so what?

Those all sound like
ADHD behaviours

that I've apparently
passed on to Viv.

Pfft.

It's not that parents
today have more things

to worry about than
our own parents did

or that those worries
are more important.

Actually, never mind,

our own parents
were asleep at the wheel.

Think of all the wonderful
things you've passed down

on to your kids,
like the joie de vivre
you got from me.

And Corey got his
intelligence and singing voice

from me, and his skin
sensitivity from Bo.

He's the perfect blend.

Hmm, yeah, well I understand
how genetics work, I just...

I don't know, I feel guilty.

Don't. Feel lucky
because here's something else

I'm passing down on to you.

No one wants
your rollers, Mom.

Mom, stop giving us
your garbage and pretending

it's a present.
- Oh, fine.

Do you mind if I put my pants
in there for 15 minutes?

They're all wrinkly-dinkly
from sitting.

- Oh, um.
- Okay.

- Oh, my God.
- How fun.

Just us girls, right?
- Uh-huh.

Hello.

Is Daddy kicking you out
of the house? Fleas again?

Go on, tell her.

I'm going to sleep
on the porch tonight.

- No, you're not.
- Oh.

Hate to say I told you so,
but uh, in your face, kiddo.

- No, no, no, no.

Felix's broken scooter
was stolen off the front porch.

There's no way they're not
stealing a mint condition child.

Every day we lose at being
on time and I wanna win.

That's called determination.
Get that from your mom.

You're also a sore loser.
You get that from your mom, too.

That's why we don't play
board games in this house.

Yes, it's true, I'm afraid,
you and I are alike.

We don't go down
without a fight.

And you know what?
That's why we're gonna be

so on time tomorrow,

we're gonna beat that counsellor
to her office.

Unless she sleeps
over at school.

Oh, creating unlikely
scenarios to worry about.

That you get from me.

Hey, you know what?

Sometimes when Mommy
gets really mad,

that actually helps me
try harder.

What do you think about getting
really mad at being late?

Let's do this!

Nothing can stop us now.

Oh, it's the smoke detector,
it's doing that thing.

- Detecting smoke?
- No, no, it just needs

new batteries.
I'll do it in the morning.

- James.

I'll do it now.

Can't get back to sleep.

- It's 2:00 AM.
- Yeah, we went to bed
too early.

I took a six-hour nap.
- So, what are we gonna do?

Oh, uh. It's 7:20.

We have to be out
of here by 7:45!

Okay, we gotta be outta
here like in ten minutes.

Hey, ho, there they are.
Look at this, fully dressed!

Yeah, you got underwear on?

- Two pairs.
- Nice.

I'll skip brushing
my teeth today.

Okay, well you can brush them
in the car

and you can spit
when we get to school.

Viv, stop chewing,
just swallow.

Okay, we got seven minutes,
we can do it.

Let's go, let's go, let's go!

Alright, purse,
car keys, phone.

Let me grab Morris.
We are in good shape.

Here we go and...

poo face.
- Where's the potty?

♪ Where's your head at ♪

It's on the stairs
for some reason!

Somebody get the ABC book.

There's farm animals
in it!

Dump it out!

He's ready, he's ready.

Come on, Morris,
you can do this.

Go eat, go on. Go on.

Here we go, here we go.

Should we just
put him in a diaper?

No, we can't regress now.

Guys, let's sing
the song together.

♪ Poop goes in the potty ♪

♪ When it comes out your body ♪

♪ Poop goes in the potty ♪

♪ When it comes out your body ♪

No, no, no!

He's bluffing. Let's go!

Let's go,
let's go, let's go!

- Okay, okay.
- Pants back on, pants back on,

pants back on.
And then we go up. Wee!

Thank you.

- Where is everybody?
- Yeah, it's a PA Day.

- Oh.
- I knew that.

What? Why didn't
you say anything?

Nobody asked me.

Well, you know what?

We made it here by 8:00 AM.

We are on time. We did it!

Nobody's here,
but it still counts.

- Yeah!

Hey, uh, by some miracle,
did we arrange

childcare for the day?
- Oh, hell no.

- Okay.
- Ugh, P-U!

Morris was not bluffing.

- Come on, Morris.
- Ooh!

Remember when
we wanted to go out,

we just left the house?

Hmm, no diaper bags,
no car seats,

no screaming,
just walking out the door.

Hmm.
Now we're in charge
of other people's schedules

and they don't care
if they're late.

They don't even know
where they're going
most of the time.

So, yeah, you can go
outta your mind

trying to get outta
the house, but uh...

Yeah, not really
a but on this one.

Hmm, no.
Getting everyone organized

to leave on time sucks.
It sucks.

Sucks!

You think she noticed

that we're not on time?
- Yep.

But I got a good excuse
for being late.

See, Viv has ADHD and it takes
up a lot of our time.

Plus, I got a secret weapon.
- Wait a second, you can use

your kids as an excuse
for your own failings?

That's a game-changer!
- Late again?

Uh, hey Marla.
I, uh, now, technically,

I'm not actually late.
I know it seems like it.

I was in Brampton
at a sleepover.

It was an unfamiliar commute.
- I was on time,

but then I became late
when I stopped

to get you mini muffins.

- From both of us, right?
- Eh...

It has been a pleasure
working with you both.

I'm sorry,
but you've been let go.

Okay, Marla,
I know, I apologize a lot

and that probably lessens
the effectiveness

of the apology, but hear me out.

Viv has ADHD.
It's a growing concern

and we've obviously
been very worried about it.

- We? I'm sorry.
- You don't think I've lost

sleep and subsequently
slept in, missed my alarm,

come in late worrying about
Viv and little Phoenix?

- Felix.
- Felix?

Attention!

As I have been warning
for months now,

Fintekoäly has bought
Gero's Grocery.

Excuse me?

They are closing
the Baggie's Buys division

and we've all been
made redundant.

What? Okay...

Marla, I'm so sorry I'm late.

I slipped in the shower
right on my head.

I don't know how long
I was out for, but I rallied.

Get to work, Beth.

You haven't said much
about losing your job.

Huh.

Are you okay?

Are you, are you sad,
are you angry?

I don't... I mean,
I hated that job,

but a lot of great
memories there.

- Part of it.
- Great.

- Transaction approved.
- That's how we do it.

Alright, alright.

I am taking every--
Scorched Earth!

Try this, James.
- Canana Colada.

Boom.

- Mark my words,

do not fail.

See this, at least?

♪ Good life, good life ♪

- Well, this is game.
- Are you seeing this?

♪ Like the city
is on fire tonight ♪

♪ This could really
be a good life ♪

♪ A good, good life... ♪

Okay, have a nice day.

Actually,
those memories suck.

I'm not gonna miss
that place at all.

Okay then. To the future.