All language subtitles for Children.Ruin.Everything.S03E05.Clothes.1080p.NF.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H.264-FLUX_track3_[eng]

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,047 --> 00:00:07,132 Done! 2 00:00:07,132 --> 00:00:09,134 {\an8}Oh, heard you like clothes. 3 00:00:09,134 --> 00:00:11,177 {\an8}What? There's more? 4 00:00:11,177 --> 00:00:13,680 Okay, we need to pick one outfit 5 00:00:13,680 --> 00:00:15,724 and stick to it, like a cartoon character. 6 00:00:15,724 --> 00:00:17,726 Or we need to bring back the toga. 7 00:00:17,726 --> 00:00:19,269 It was all you needed. 8 00:00:19,269 --> 00:00:21,688 Felix, use a plate and utensils. 9 00:00:21,688 --> 00:00:22,981 C'mon. 10 00:00:22,981 --> 00:00:24,441 Not on the couch! 11 00:00:24,441 --> 00:00:26,359 Oh, not on the clean pile. 12 00:00:28,278 --> 00:00:29,571 I'll go get a plate. 13 00:00:29,571 --> 00:00:31,281 Buying clothes used to be so simple. 14 00:00:31,281 --> 00:00:33,491 If an outfit looked good and was affordable, you got it. 15 00:00:33,491 --> 00:00:35,410 But with kids you have to consider other things. 16 00:00:35,410 --> 00:00:37,287 Like, will stains wash out of this? 17 00:00:37,287 --> 00:00:39,914 And will this hide stains? 18 00:00:39,914 --> 00:00:43,084 Kids are so messy it would make more sense to wrap them in paper towel everyday. 19 00:00:43,084 --> 00:00:45,211 Instead, you buy cheap clothes and hope 20 00:00:45,211 --> 00:00:47,797 they last long enough to pass down to the next adorable slob. 21 00:00:47,797 --> 00:00:50,258 Which works great! Until your kids care how they look. 22 00:00:50,258 --> 00:00:51,676 Those are my pants! 23 00:00:51,676 --> 00:00:53,011 Yeah, well, they don't fit you anymore. 24 00:00:53,011 --> 00:00:55,138 So, Janice's clothes don't fit her. 25 00:00:55,138 --> 00:00:56,681 And she's a beauty. 26 00:00:56,681 --> 00:00:59,601 Once they start voicing their opinions 27 00:00:59,601 --> 00:01:01,311 like you foolishly encourage them to do, 28 00:01:01,311 --> 00:01:03,146 you're in trouble. 29 00:01:07,609 --> 00:01:10,779 I'm amazed that Viv brought home all her lunch containers and lids. 30 00:01:11,654 --> 00:01:13,364 {\an8}This says "Henry." 31 00:01:13,364 --> 00:01:15,158 {\an8}She brought home another kid's stuff. 32 00:01:15,158 --> 00:01:16,785 {\an8}Uh, Felix... 33 00:01:16,785 --> 00:01:18,369 {\an8}What are you doing, laundry? 34 00:01:18,369 --> 00:01:19,412 {\an8}First time. 35 00:01:19,412 --> 00:01:21,081 {\an8}I woke up with a nosebleed. 36 00:01:21,081 --> 00:01:23,833 {\an8}My pajamas and pillow were all bloody. 37 00:01:23,833 --> 00:01:26,044 {\an8}Do you even know how to get blood out of clothes? 38 00:01:26,044 --> 00:01:27,754 {\an8}Extra hot wash and extra hot dry. 39 00:01:27,754 --> 00:01:29,964 {\an8}- Okay, so you don't know. - Nope, that's not how you do it. 40 00:01:29,964 --> 00:01:32,008 {\an8}And I know you hate wasting water, 41 00:01:32,008 --> 00:01:33,760 {\an8}so I washed all my clothes. 42 00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:36,846 {\an8}Felix, you shrunk everything. 43 00:01:36,846 --> 00:01:39,516 {\an8}That's okay. I needed new clothes. 44 00:01:39,516 --> 00:01:41,935 {\an8}No, you don't just get a new wardrobe anytime you want. 45 00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:44,646 {\an8}Are you kidding? Next time you want to do laundry or grow, 46 00:01:44,646 --> 00:01:46,189 {\an8}you need to talk to us first. 47 00:01:46,189 --> 00:01:48,316 {\an8}Okay, okay, okay. Maybe these will fit Viv. 48 00:01:48,316 --> 00:01:49,734 {\an8}Not my style, crocodile. 49 00:01:49,734 --> 00:01:50,944 {\an8}Um... 50 00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:52,654 {\an8}Hello, what's with the top? 51 00:01:52,654 --> 00:01:54,948 {\an8}What? I saw this on a TV show, 52 00:01:54,948 --> 00:01:56,866 {\an8}in a book, and on the iPad. 53 00:01:56,866 --> 00:01:58,535 {\an8}Okay, let's just pull it on down. 54 00:01:59,369 --> 00:02:00,662 {\an8}C'mon, guys. 55 00:02:00,662 --> 00:02:01,746 {\an8}Let's get to school. 56 00:02:01,746 --> 00:02:03,456 {\an8}I don't have anything else to wear. 57 00:02:03,456 --> 00:02:06,793 {\an8}Okay, why don't you wear that suit that Dawn Auntie gave you 58 00:02:06,793 --> 00:02:08,211 {\an8}for Corey's Montessori graduation. 59 00:02:08,211 --> 00:02:09,420 {\an8}Okay. 60 00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:13,174 {\an8}Can I shrink my shirt like Felix? 61 00:02:13,174 --> 00:02:15,051 {\an8}That's a hard no. 62 00:02:19,681 --> 00:02:21,307 Yeah, but that's part of the fun. 63 00:02:21,307 --> 00:02:23,268 Chill berry, you know what I mean? Ice berry. 64 00:02:23,268 --> 00:02:25,145 I don't think it's a berry at all. 65 00:02:28,940 --> 00:02:30,108 Marla... 66 00:02:30,108 --> 00:02:31,651 What a reveal. 67 00:02:31,651 --> 00:02:34,279 Like my new sweat jacket? 68 00:02:34,279 --> 00:02:35,864 Not used to seeing you in your civvies, Marla. 69 00:02:35,864 --> 00:02:40,368 Mr. Gero met with the top brass from Fintekoäly, 70 00:02:40,368 --> 00:02:42,704 and I wanted to eavesdrop without drawing attention. 71 00:02:42,704 --> 00:02:46,291 Just a pedestrian taking a stroll through a private business. 72 00:02:46,291 --> 00:02:49,460 I always thought that Gero's should provide branded hoodies for the staff. 73 00:02:49,460 --> 00:02:51,713 That'd be nice. Also, it's freezing in here. 74 00:02:51,713 --> 00:02:54,382 Yes! I have to wear an undershirt just to keep my nipples at bay. 75 00:02:54,382 --> 00:02:56,885 - That's genius. - Right? I mean, look, it really helps. 76 00:02:56,885 --> 00:03:00,221 Not your stupid nipples, James. The branded clothing. 77 00:03:00,221 --> 00:03:03,683 We could sell a whole line of discount Baggies Buys clothing. 78 00:03:03,683 --> 00:03:06,519 I don't know. Fast fashion is an ugly business. 79 00:03:06,519 --> 00:03:09,522 I agree. Let's not exploit a developing country for their cheap labour. 80 00:03:09,522 --> 00:03:12,483 No, I was saying the clothes are ugly and the quality sucks. 81 00:03:12,483 --> 00:03:14,611 Here, feel my sleeve. - No. 82 00:03:14,611 --> 00:03:17,780 I shook the hand of the Italian tailor who made this. 83 00:03:17,780 --> 00:03:20,283 James is right. You can't make a buck in the garment biz 84 00:03:20,283 --> 00:03:21,951 without the woke police all over your ass. 85 00:03:21,951 --> 00:03:24,162 I did not say that at all. 86 00:03:24,162 --> 00:03:26,372 But generating new lucrative revenue streams 87 00:03:26,372 --> 00:03:28,666 is a surefire way to prove to Mr. Gero 88 00:03:28,666 --> 00:03:31,252 and those Fintekoäly creeps that this department 89 00:03:31,252 --> 00:03:33,630 will not be replaced by robots. 90 00:03:35,256 --> 00:03:38,301 Marla, I really don't think the robots are coming for us. 91 00:03:38,301 --> 00:03:40,511 You sound crazy, James. 92 00:03:40,511 --> 00:03:42,263 Okay, let's run with this idea. 93 00:03:42,263 --> 00:03:45,266 I need an ethical loophole, pronto! 94 00:03:45,266 --> 00:03:47,185 Okay, we're on it, Marla. 95 00:03:48,770 --> 00:03:50,480 C'mon, we ain't doing that. 96 00:03:52,815 --> 00:03:54,734 Morris made this for you in daycare. 97 00:03:54,734 --> 00:03:56,444 - This is a forgery. - Yeah. 98 00:03:56,444 --> 00:03:58,863 - Recycling bin. - Agreed. 99 00:04:00,907 --> 00:04:01,991 I need a drink. 100 00:04:01,991 --> 00:04:03,201 Hello there, Mr. Business. 101 00:04:03,201 --> 00:04:04,744 How was school? 102 00:04:04,744 --> 00:04:06,579 All the big kids made fun of me 103 00:04:06,579 --> 00:04:08,706 and the little kids thought I was a teacher. 104 00:04:08,706 --> 00:04:10,708 I need normal clothes. 105 00:04:10,708 --> 00:04:13,544 I'm on it. Snaps N' Zippers is having a big online sale. 106 00:04:15,088 --> 00:04:17,757 Don't you think we should be buying those from a store 107 00:04:17,757 --> 00:04:19,133 that's a little bit more conscientious? 108 00:04:19,133 --> 00:04:20,969 We should. But it's expensive. 109 00:04:20,969 --> 00:04:22,637 And he ruined all his clothes. 110 00:04:22,637 --> 00:04:25,139 So, the planet is going to have to take one for the team. 111 00:04:25,139 --> 00:04:27,392 What about Dawn? Doesn't she buy Corey's clothes from stores like that? 112 00:04:27,392 --> 00:04:29,227 I mean, what about some ethically sourced hand-me-downs? 113 00:04:29,227 --> 00:04:31,104 James, I've been shopping for half an hour. 114 00:04:31,104 --> 00:04:34,482 You want me to now go to my rich sister's and beg for scraps, again? 115 00:04:34,482 --> 00:04:36,859 She might offer to make us dinner and we don't have to cook... 116 00:04:36,859 --> 00:04:38,861 Felix, get your sister. We're going to Dawn Auntie's. 117 00:04:38,861 --> 00:04:39,862 Okay. 118 00:04:42,365 --> 00:04:43,491 Yeah... 119 00:04:43,491 --> 00:04:45,243 Oh, that's a nice shirt. 120 00:04:45,243 --> 00:04:47,078 I wish I could wear a white shirt. 121 00:04:47,078 --> 00:04:49,455 Every time I do, the kids treat me like a human hand towel. 122 00:04:49,455 --> 00:04:50,790 That's a shame. 123 00:04:50,790 --> 00:04:52,792 A crisp white shirt is my signature style. 124 00:04:52,792 --> 00:04:55,086 At work, they call me "Crispy-D." 125 00:04:55,086 --> 00:04:56,212 They do? 126 00:04:56,212 --> 00:04:57,588 No. 127 00:04:58,047 --> 00:04:59,549 Thanks so much for dinner, guys. 128 00:04:59,549 --> 00:05:01,467 I really hope we're not imposing. 129 00:05:01,467 --> 00:05:04,345 I'm sorry we didn't have more in the way of extra clothes for Felix. 130 00:05:04,345 --> 00:05:06,806 Well, if you're looking for sustainable clothing, 131 00:05:06,806 --> 00:05:10,685 we buy everything for Corey at "Le Petit Chèvre Enjoué." 132 00:05:10,685 --> 00:05:12,312 Well, Le Petit is a little... 133 00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:14,689 chi-chi for your tastes, no? 134 00:05:14,689 --> 00:05:16,816 You usually shop at that big store 135 00:05:16,816 --> 00:05:19,152 with all the bright colours and vanity sizing. 136 00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:22,030 I went in there once when I needed pants in a pinch. 137 00:05:22,030 --> 00:05:24,240 You know I'm a size zero? 138 00:05:24,240 --> 00:05:27,201 We're just trying to be more conscientious consumers, is the thing. 139 00:05:27,201 --> 00:05:29,245 Yes, and I, personally, 140 00:05:29,245 --> 00:05:31,039 don't feel that we're terrible people 141 00:05:31,039 --> 00:05:32,749 because we choose to shop affordably. 142 00:05:32,749 --> 00:05:34,375 We make up for it in other ways. 143 00:05:34,375 --> 00:05:36,502 Like, washing sandwich bags and never going on vacation. 144 00:05:36,502 --> 00:05:37,962 And I think it's a little uncomfortable 145 00:05:37,962 --> 00:05:39,881 that our kids' clothes are made by other kids. 146 00:05:39,881 --> 00:05:41,883 Well, some would say that's a very Western perspective. 147 00:05:41,883 --> 00:05:44,510 Right, some would say that our culture 148 00:05:44,510 --> 00:05:46,637 is too precious about children. 149 00:05:46,637 --> 00:05:49,182 Dad, I can't open my sparkling water. 150 00:05:49,182 --> 00:05:51,100 The tab hurts my finger. 151 00:05:51,100 --> 00:05:54,771 Aww... Give it to Daddy, sweetheart. 152 00:05:54,771 --> 00:05:56,564 Don't hurt your wittle fingey. 153 00:05:56,564 --> 00:05:58,191 There you go, darling. 154 00:06:02,403 --> 00:06:04,489 You guys want to hear this scary story? 155 00:06:04,489 --> 00:06:05,531 Yes! 156 00:06:05,531 --> 00:06:07,700 - Woo! - Oh! 157 00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:09,160 Ho-ho-ho! 158 00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:11,079 Look, kids, it's crummy Santa. 159 00:06:11,079 --> 00:06:12,914 Kids grow so fast 160 00:06:12,914 --> 00:06:14,999 and clothes don't grow at all. It's a problem. 161 00:06:14,999 --> 00:06:17,085 You've got mere months before the kid clothes you bought 162 00:06:17,085 --> 00:06:18,294 are useless and bound for the garbage. 163 00:06:18,294 --> 00:06:20,213 Really pays to have a neighbour 164 00:06:20,213 --> 00:06:22,256 that's crazy enough to have more kids than us. 165 00:06:22,256 --> 00:06:25,051 Rachel traded me all these hand-me-downs for a tetra pack of wine. 166 00:06:25,051 --> 00:06:26,469 Smells like soup and dogs. 167 00:06:26,469 --> 00:06:29,180 Felix, every family has their own smells. 168 00:06:29,180 --> 00:06:30,890 Luckily, there's a network of parents 169 00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:32,391 who are both needing more clothes 170 00:06:32,391 --> 00:06:34,018 and wanting to get old clothes out of their house. 171 00:06:34,018 --> 00:06:36,145 And so our clothes get many second lives... 172 00:06:36,145 --> 00:06:38,773 before inevitably polluting our precious but dying world. 173 00:06:38,773 --> 00:06:40,691 You promised to keep it positive. 174 00:06:42,902 --> 00:06:44,320 I am not wearing that. 175 00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:46,572 Yeah, nobody is. Who gets this for their kids? 176 00:06:46,572 --> 00:06:48,491 It's actually very "on-brand" for Rachel. 177 00:06:48,491 --> 00:06:50,451 Theoretically, I really shouldn't like her, 178 00:06:50,451 --> 00:06:52,370 but ultimately, I very much do. 179 00:06:52,370 --> 00:06:54,789 A belly button shirt! 180 00:06:54,789 --> 00:06:56,707 What does "Girls are on fire" mean? 181 00:06:56,707 --> 00:06:59,752 It means girls can burn you and cook food? 182 00:06:59,752 --> 00:07:01,254 I love it! 183 00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:03,047 I don't know about that, Viv. You're only six. 184 00:07:03,047 --> 00:07:04,841 Please! 185 00:07:04,841 --> 00:07:06,676 You know, I have a thing about belly buttons. 186 00:07:06,676 --> 00:07:08,928 I just feel that they should be covered and protected. 187 00:07:08,928 --> 00:07:10,346 From what? 188 00:07:10,346 --> 00:07:12,432 The cold, predators... 189 00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:15,017 from lions, lion predators. 190 00:07:16,727 --> 00:07:18,146 What is this? 191 00:07:18,146 --> 00:07:19,939 Oh my God, that's someone's retainer. 192 00:07:19,939 --> 00:07:21,816 - Okay. - Let's all go wash our hands. 193 00:07:21,816 --> 00:07:23,443 Yeah... 194 00:07:30,783 --> 00:07:32,493 You cleaning the house with a T-shirt? 195 00:07:32,493 --> 00:07:33,953 Yeah. 196 00:07:33,953 --> 00:07:36,372 I have diverted some of Rachel's ruder hand-me-downs 197 00:07:36,372 --> 00:07:38,833 from the landfill and turned them into rags. 198 00:07:39,792 --> 00:07:41,669 "The person beside me is stupid." 199 00:07:41,669 --> 00:07:44,589 Did you get any new rags from Snaps N' Zippers? 200 00:07:44,589 --> 00:07:46,632 Don't judge me. I went to a thrift place first, 201 00:07:46,632 --> 00:07:49,343 but they wanted just as much for the old stuff as they did for the new and... 202 00:07:49,343 --> 00:07:51,596 I could not justify that. - Could you justify it to Greta? 203 00:07:51,596 --> 00:07:53,222 - However... - Just asking. 204 00:07:53,222 --> 00:07:56,100 ...I did find a few things at Snaps N' Zippers' 205 00:07:56,100 --> 00:07:58,102 more eco-conscious line. 206 00:07:58,102 --> 00:08:00,813 - Okay. - Pajama Joe, get over here. 207 00:08:02,023 --> 00:08:03,691 "Think'n Bout' It." 208 00:08:03,691 --> 00:08:05,485 That's the name of this line. 209 00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:07,653 Hey, got you some new duds. 210 00:08:09,739 --> 00:08:11,491 - Argh. - What? What's wrong? 211 00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:14,452 I can't wear this. I'm in grade five. 212 00:08:14,452 --> 00:08:17,246 - You're ten. - These are so mid. 213 00:08:17,246 --> 00:08:19,540 I'm not wearing them. - Felix! 214 00:08:20,416 --> 00:08:21,834 What does mid mean? 215 00:08:21,834 --> 00:08:23,377 You're so old. 216 00:08:23,377 --> 00:08:25,171 How would you like it if your mom 217 00:08:25,171 --> 00:08:27,006 bought you clothes that you hated. 218 00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:28,841 Oh, that happened. All the time. 219 00:08:28,841 --> 00:08:31,135 And I had to wear them because that's the way it works. 220 00:08:31,135 --> 00:08:33,012 Well, that sucks! 221 00:08:34,138 --> 00:08:35,473 You know what sucks means, right? 222 00:08:35,473 --> 00:08:37,308 Yeah! 223 00:08:38,768 --> 00:08:40,061 Hey. 224 00:08:40,978 --> 00:08:42,688 Put these on. - Mom, 225 00:08:42,688 --> 00:08:44,565 I really don't want to wear this kid stuff. 226 00:08:44,565 --> 00:08:46,275 Yeah, well, it's either that 227 00:08:46,275 --> 00:08:47,902 or you go shopping in your PJ's. 228 00:08:48,778 --> 00:08:49,987 We're going shopping? 229 00:08:50,821 --> 00:08:52,865 You should look the way you want to look. 230 00:08:52,865 --> 00:08:55,159 And I get that you're not a little guy anymore. 231 00:08:55,868 --> 00:08:58,079 But you'll always be my little guy. 232 00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:00,873 Can we go to that skateboard store 233 00:09:00,873 --> 00:09:02,458 with all the ripped stuff? 234 00:09:02,458 --> 00:09:03,960 And those shirts with the mushrooms. 235 00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:05,878 Ahem. Uh-huh. 236 00:09:07,421 --> 00:09:09,298 There's always broken glass out front. 237 00:09:09,298 --> 00:09:11,008 Yeah, I know the one. 238 00:09:16,013 --> 00:09:17,765 Well, I can't believe I'm about to say this, 239 00:09:17,765 --> 00:09:20,059 but there's no way I'm paying good money for holes. 240 00:09:23,479 --> 00:09:25,481 Whoa, look at this. 241 00:09:25,481 --> 00:09:26,983 These are cool. 242 00:09:26,983 --> 00:09:29,527 Felix, we were just given pants with rips in them. 243 00:09:29,527 --> 00:09:31,821 Real rips that were earned. 244 00:09:31,821 --> 00:09:34,115 I want to wear stuff like this. 245 00:09:34,115 --> 00:09:35,866 Yeah, and I want to wear a white shirt, 246 00:09:35,866 --> 00:09:37,451 but some things are just not practical. 247 00:09:37,451 --> 00:09:39,704 Mom, I'm trying them on. 248 00:09:39,704 --> 00:09:41,330 Well, those are not going to fit. 249 00:09:42,915 --> 00:09:44,083 Don't come in. 250 00:09:44,083 --> 00:09:46,919 Well, how am I going to tell if they fit? 251 00:09:46,919 --> 00:09:50,047 Could you just wait outside the store until it's time to pay? 252 00:09:50,047 --> 00:09:51,882 Um. No. 253 00:09:52,883 --> 00:09:54,260 Fine... 254 00:09:54,260 --> 00:09:56,178 But don't act like my mom. 255 00:09:56,178 --> 00:09:58,681 Just pretend you're a regular lady. 256 00:09:58,681 --> 00:10:00,349 Please? 257 00:10:14,363 --> 00:10:16,574 I wish we could keep shopping with Felix and Mommy. 258 00:10:16,574 --> 00:10:17,575 Yeah. 259 00:10:17,575 --> 00:10:18,909 I wish that man didn't get mad 260 00:10:18,909 --> 00:10:20,870 when I accidentally tipped that mannequin over. 261 00:10:20,870 --> 00:10:23,205 It's okay, honey. It's safer out here anyway. 262 00:10:24,165 --> 00:10:26,709 That girl is wearing a crop top! 263 00:10:26,709 --> 00:10:29,378 Oh, hey, hey, we don't have to yell and point at people. No, no, no. 264 00:10:29,378 --> 00:10:30,838 She's not supposed to wear a crop top. 265 00:10:30,838 --> 00:10:32,506 She'll get a cold, she'll get predators. 266 00:10:32,506 --> 00:10:34,300 She doesn't... You're old enough. 267 00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:37,470 Uh... Wear whatever you want. 268 00:10:42,516 --> 00:10:44,894 Why can't I wear what I want? 269 00:10:49,732 --> 00:10:51,400 Excuse me. 270 00:10:53,527 --> 00:10:55,279 I'm sorry, I think that young man 271 00:10:55,279 --> 00:10:57,073 is trying to get your attention. 272 00:10:57,073 --> 00:10:58,366 - Is that your son? - No! 273 00:10:58,366 --> 00:11:01,035 Yes, please don't tell him I said that. 274 00:11:01,035 --> 00:11:02,578 Sorry? 275 00:11:02,578 --> 00:11:04,163 I'm just trying not to embarrass him. 276 00:11:04,163 --> 00:11:05,456 You know, he's at that age. 277 00:11:05,456 --> 00:11:06,791 Right... 278 00:11:06,791 --> 00:11:08,417 Could you please go over there and tell him, 279 00:11:08,417 --> 00:11:09,794 we're not shopping for shoes today. 280 00:11:10,294 --> 00:11:11,629 Thank you. 281 00:11:14,173 --> 00:11:15,132 What's up, bro? 282 00:11:15,132 --> 00:11:16,300 - You need something? - Yeah. 283 00:11:16,300 --> 00:11:17,968 How much are these kicks? 284 00:11:17,968 --> 00:11:20,221 Oh, these are straight fire. They go for 70. 285 00:11:20,930 --> 00:11:22,139 Dollars, right? 286 00:11:22,139 --> 00:11:23,516 Yup, 70 dollars, man. 287 00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:24,975 For each? 288 00:11:24,975 --> 00:11:26,268 For the pair. 289 00:11:26,268 --> 00:11:27,895 - Oh. - Yeah... 290 00:11:27,895 --> 00:11:29,980 Is that lady over there your mom? 291 00:11:31,273 --> 00:11:32,441 Yeah... 292 00:11:32,441 --> 00:11:34,443 Fine, what size? 293 00:11:34,443 --> 00:11:36,904 Um... Let's see. 294 00:11:36,904 --> 00:11:39,073 Hi, no, we're not shopping for shoes today. 295 00:11:39,615 --> 00:11:40,574 So... 296 00:11:40,574 --> 00:11:42,326 Mm-hmm. 297 00:11:42,326 --> 00:11:44,370 Yeah. - I'm going to get your size. 298 00:11:49,417 --> 00:11:50,584 Nice moves. 299 00:11:50,584 --> 00:11:52,711 Thanks. I love these. 300 00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:56,340 Yeah, 70 dollars. 301 00:11:56,340 --> 00:11:58,843 And that price is for both shoes, Mom. 302 00:11:58,843 --> 00:12:01,053 Felix, shoes are not on the shopping list. 303 00:12:01,053 --> 00:12:02,471 You didn't shrink your shoes. 304 00:12:02,471 --> 00:12:05,224 But these are straight fire. 305 00:12:05,224 --> 00:12:06,934 Oh, that's new. 306 00:12:06,934 --> 00:12:08,936 I say that all the time. 307 00:12:08,936 --> 00:12:12,565 Felix, we're already spending a lot of money to replace the clothes. 308 00:12:14,984 --> 00:12:16,152 You know? 309 00:12:16,861 --> 00:12:17,987 Okay. 310 00:12:24,743 --> 00:12:27,329 That dude is going to sleep in those shoes. 311 00:12:27,329 --> 00:12:29,707 It's okay to buy their happiness once in a while, right? 312 00:12:29,707 --> 00:12:31,208 Yeah... - Absolutely, 313 00:12:31,208 --> 00:12:32,960 we're just going to cut cheese out of the grocery bill 314 00:12:32,960 --> 00:12:34,545 for the next six months. We're going to be fine. 315 00:12:34,545 --> 00:12:36,297 I was looking for a reason to cut the cheese. 316 00:12:36,297 --> 00:12:38,340 Oh, there she is. 317 00:12:38,340 --> 00:12:39,592 There she is! 318 00:12:39,592 --> 00:12:41,760 That's my wife. Listen, 319 00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:45,222 so Viv is still fixated on this crop top situation. 320 00:12:45,222 --> 00:12:48,684 And I don't know how to explain to her that it's inappropriate. 321 00:12:48,684 --> 00:12:50,478 Is it inappropriate? 322 00:12:51,061 --> 00:12:53,189 She's not being inappropriate. 323 00:12:53,189 --> 00:12:55,316 But, I mean, there are creeps. 324 00:12:55,316 --> 00:12:57,443 Right? There are creeps. That are out there. 325 00:12:57,443 --> 00:12:59,236 And they're going to be creepy. Creepy creeps. 326 00:12:59,236 --> 00:13:01,113 And we have to explain to her about the creeps, right? 327 00:13:01,113 --> 00:13:04,241 You want to tell her that she's going to invite unwanted attention 328 00:13:04,241 --> 00:13:05,534 because of what she chooses to wear? 329 00:13:05,534 --> 00:13:07,119 I don't want to tell her. I'm just saying 330 00:13:07,119 --> 00:13:08,996 that's the world we live in. 331 00:13:08,996 --> 00:13:11,665 Because we tell boys they can dress however they want, but not girls. 332 00:13:11,665 --> 00:13:13,584 Okay, fine. 333 00:13:13,584 --> 00:13:16,003 I am a Handmaid's Tale villain. 334 00:13:16,003 --> 00:13:19,924 You're right, you got me. It's just crop tops for all the little children. 335 00:13:19,924 --> 00:13:22,968 And leather undies with the frilly on the outside 336 00:13:22,968 --> 00:13:25,179 and the snappies connected to the... 337 00:13:25,179 --> 00:13:26,680 - Garter belts? - Yeah. 338 00:13:26,680 --> 00:13:28,766 Garter belts for all the babies. 339 00:13:35,940 --> 00:13:37,316 Right now, 340 00:13:37,316 --> 00:13:40,611 Viv has no hang-ups about how she looks. 341 00:13:42,029 --> 00:13:45,491 It's a very special time that does not last long. 342 00:13:46,242 --> 00:13:49,787 She's going to hear about all the ways her body is inappropriate 343 00:13:49,787 --> 00:13:52,790 or not good enough when she's older. 344 00:13:55,042 --> 00:13:56,126 Yeah... 345 00:13:58,212 --> 00:14:00,548 There's got to be some rules, though, right? 346 00:14:00,548 --> 00:14:02,383 Like, no fur. 347 00:14:03,175 --> 00:14:05,219 Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, that's... 348 00:14:05,219 --> 00:14:08,180 Because it's cruel. Of course, also... 349 00:14:08,180 --> 00:14:10,432 no white after labour day. 350 00:14:10,432 --> 00:14:12,268 - That's another one. - Or ever if you have kids. 351 00:14:17,523 --> 00:14:19,149 Ha! Let's do it. 352 00:14:23,362 --> 00:14:24,697 Hey, what's that little dot on your shirt? 353 00:14:24,697 --> 00:14:26,949 A belly button. Is this one okay with you? 354 00:14:26,949 --> 00:14:29,285 I like this compromise, do you like this compromise? 355 00:14:29,285 --> 00:14:31,412 I got marker on the couch. 356 00:14:32,454 --> 00:14:35,249 Oh, hello there, nice shirt. 357 00:14:35,249 --> 00:14:37,376 Felt like looking crisp today. 358 00:14:37,376 --> 00:14:38,878 What's our lunch today, Dad? 359 00:14:38,878 --> 00:14:42,673 Oh, it would be a tortellini, extra saucy. 360 00:14:42,673 --> 00:14:44,925 - Yes. - And how is it you plan on saying goodbye 361 00:14:44,925 --> 00:14:46,302 to our disgusting children? 362 00:14:55,394 --> 00:14:56,604 Bye now. 363 00:14:56,604 --> 00:14:58,355 - Bye! - Bye. 364 00:14:59,565 --> 00:15:00,983 Bye bye now. 365 00:15:00,983 --> 00:15:03,319 Bye... bye bye. 366 00:15:04,737 --> 00:15:07,239 Most impressive, Mr. Wick. 367 00:15:09,116 --> 00:15:10,075 Damn it. 368 00:15:10,075 --> 00:15:11,744 See ya. 369 00:15:13,412 --> 00:15:15,039 It's perfect. This is going to be exciting. 370 00:15:15,039 --> 00:15:16,624 I think this is really going to work. 371 00:15:16,624 --> 00:15:18,250 - All your idea. - Guess what... 372 00:15:18,250 --> 00:15:20,544 what's-her-name who works here has? 373 00:15:20,544 --> 00:15:21,962 She's talking about Beth. 374 00:15:21,962 --> 00:15:23,589 Beth! Black toenail. Already saw it. 375 00:15:23,589 --> 00:15:26,175 No, a cousin who's in jail. 376 00:15:26,175 --> 00:15:27,927 Oh, is this gossip? I don't think we should be 377 00:15:27,927 --> 00:15:30,220 judging people's cousins or judging people based on their cousins, 378 00:15:30,220 --> 00:15:32,473 right, Ennis? - No, it's not gossip. It is gold. 379 00:15:32,473 --> 00:15:35,225 Oh, then, Ennis' cousin Berk was incarcerated. 380 00:15:35,225 --> 00:15:37,770 Hey, he sold a few exotic pets that he acquired illegally. 381 00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:40,439 Okay? Big deal. - Beth's cousin is a real criminal. 382 00:15:40,439 --> 00:15:42,483 He's in jail for manslaughter. 383 00:15:42,483 --> 00:15:44,151 Okay, so ending a human life. 384 00:15:44,151 --> 00:15:45,861 You know what Beth's cousin does in there, James? 385 00:15:45,861 --> 00:15:47,905 In the slammer? Tell him, Ennis. 386 00:15:47,905 --> 00:15:49,740 Beth said that he taught himself how to sew. 387 00:15:49,740 --> 00:15:51,909 And now he runs a class where other inmates can learn. 388 00:15:51,909 --> 00:15:53,494 And then I said, rather insensitively, 389 00:15:53,494 --> 00:15:54,912 "Hey, that could come in handy." 390 00:15:54,912 --> 00:15:56,789 And it's given me a brilliant idea. 391 00:15:56,789 --> 00:15:58,415 Is the idea prison labour? 392 00:15:58,415 --> 00:16:01,251 Yes. The unsexy thing about clothing sweatshops 393 00:16:01,251 --> 00:16:04,129 are the innocent workers in prison-like conditions. 394 00:16:04,129 --> 00:16:07,132 But, what if they weren't innocent? 395 00:16:07,132 --> 00:16:10,427 What if they were really bad guys already in prison? 396 00:16:11,095 --> 00:16:13,097 It's perfect and we have an in. Get to it! 397 00:16:13,097 --> 00:16:15,140 Yup. We're getting right on it. 398 00:16:15,140 --> 00:16:17,434 What does she want us to get on exactly? 399 00:16:17,434 --> 00:16:19,269 I don't know, man. I think she's just paranoid 400 00:16:19,269 --> 00:16:21,647 because she thinks robots are coming to take our jobs or whatever. 401 00:16:21,647 --> 00:16:24,274 Why would a robot be sent to replace me? 402 00:16:24,274 --> 00:16:26,402 I don't do anything. 403 00:16:31,156 --> 00:16:32,783 Hello. 404 00:16:32,783 --> 00:16:34,410 - Hi. - How was your day? 405 00:16:34,410 --> 00:16:36,996 - Aw, it was... - Felix lost his new shoes. 406 00:16:36,996 --> 00:16:38,372 - Viv! - What? 407 00:16:38,372 --> 00:16:40,165 Yeah, that was Felix's news to share. 408 00:16:40,165 --> 00:16:41,792 How? Where? 409 00:16:41,792 --> 00:16:43,127 I don't know. 410 00:16:43,127 --> 00:16:44,962 But I found these cool flip flops 411 00:16:44,962 --> 00:16:46,255 at the Lost and Found, and... 412 00:16:46,255 --> 00:16:48,090 I like them better. 413 00:16:48,090 --> 00:16:49,842 Felix, you promised me you'd look after those shoes. 414 00:16:49,842 --> 00:16:51,635 Also, gross! You can't steal 415 00:16:51,635 --> 00:16:53,345 a stranger's flip flops. 416 00:16:53,345 --> 00:16:55,305 Hey, how long before you got that stain on that shirt? 417 00:16:55,305 --> 00:16:57,808 Well, somebody brought donuts, and I got cocky and had jelly. 418 00:16:57,808 --> 00:17:00,686 Yes! I'm going to look for some dollars. 419 00:17:00,686 --> 00:17:03,147 I have to take her to the dollar store, we made a bet. 420 00:17:03,147 --> 00:17:04,940 You bet on me ruining my shirt? 421 00:17:04,940 --> 00:17:06,650 No, Viv bet on you ruining your shirt. 422 00:17:06,650 --> 00:17:08,193 I bet that you'd make it. Real ding dong. 423 00:17:08,193 --> 00:17:10,070 Can I go to the dollar store too? 424 00:17:10,070 --> 00:17:12,489 Nope, the only place you're going is back to school right now 425 00:17:12,489 --> 00:17:13,574 with me to find your shoes. 426 00:17:13,574 --> 00:17:15,451 - Argh. - Get to the car. 427 00:17:15,451 --> 00:17:16,660 Now. 428 00:17:16,660 --> 00:17:17,953 Okay... 429 00:17:17,953 --> 00:17:19,788 You hear that tone? 430 00:17:19,788 --> 00:17:22,041 Terrible, terrible son. 431 00:17:22,041 --> 00:17:23,375 New number one son. 432 00:17:28,297 --> 00:17:30,841 Oh my God, it's like a lice farm in here. 433 00:17:30,841 --> 00:17:31,925 Yeah, you're right. 434 00:17:31,925 --> 00:17:33,635 Go grab one of those hockey sticks. 435 00:17:36,513 --> 00:17:38,057 Why, why? 436 00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:39,183 Okay, here we go. 437 00:17:39,183 --> 00:17:40,768 Ready? - Ready. 438 00:17:41,477 --> 00:17:42,686 Okay, nope. 439 00:17:43,604 --> 00:17:44,938 Ah! 440 00:17:44,938 --> 00:17:47,149 Alright, I think I see a shoe. 441 00:17:47,149 --> 00:17:48,901 Ew, what is that? 442 00:17:48,901 --> 00:17:50,861 - That's pizza crust. - Eww. 443 00:17:57,951 --> 00:17:59,745 I have to go to the bathroom. 444 00:18:01,330 --> 00:18:02,623 Okay. 445 00:18:04,708 --> 00:18:07,544 Oh, wait, I see a shoe. I see a shoe. 446 00:18:07,544 --> 00:18:09,671 Ah-ha! 447 00:18:09,671 --> 00:18:12,257 Oh, you found it. That's my son's shoe. 448 00:18:12,257 --> 00:18:14,468 Oh, actually that's my son's shoe. 449 00:18:14,468 --> 00:18:17,054 Oh, it's ours. He found the left one here today 450 00:18:17,054 --> 00:18:18,806 and he couldn't find the right so that's it. 451 00:18:18,806 --> 00:18:21,642 He found the shoe today because my son lost his shoe today. 452 00:18:21,642 --> 00:18:23,268 So did mine. 453 00:18:23,268 --> 00:18:24,770 Really... 454 00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:27,314 - Hmm... - Mom, I found them. 455 00:18:27,314 --> 00:18:29,483 They were in the gym change room. 456 00:18:31,819 --> 00:18:33,821 - That's crazy. 457 00:18:33,821 --> 00:18:36,240 That's insane. I mean, Lost and Found indeed. 458 00:18:36,240 --> 00:18:39,368 - If I were to... - Thank you. C'mon, sweetie. 459 00:18:42,287 --> 00:18:44,832 Then, Marla abandoned the whole sweatshop idea 460 00:18:44,832 --> 00:18:47,709 when she found out that AI was an upcoming tool for fashion design. 461 00:18:47,709 --> 00:18:49,211 She said she would not quote, 462 00:18:49,211 --> 00:18:51,797 "Hold the corporate ladder for C-3PO to climb." 463 00:18:51,797 --> 00:18:54,383 - Woof. - A real hate on for robots. 464 00:18:56,969 --> 00:18:58,679 Oh. - Everything okay, Viv? 465 00:18:58,679 --> 00:19:00,430 Felix wrecked his clothes 466 00:19:00,430 --> 00:19:02,599 and then gets new clothes and fancy shoes. 467 00:19:02,599 --> 00:19:05,352 And I'm not even allowed to have one little shirt. 468 00:19:05,352 --> 00:19:07,521 My new shoes don't show my belly button. 469 00:19:07,521 --> 00:19:09,731 What's so wrong with my belly button? 470 00:19:09,731 --> 00:19:11,441 Nothing is wrong with your belly button, sweetie. 471 00:19:11,441 --> 00:19:12,901 Your belly button is perfect. 472 00:19:12,901 --> 00:19:16,071 In fact, if you want to have a crop top... 473 00:19:18,115 --> 00:19:19,366 ...you can have a crop top. 474 00:19:19,366 --> 00:19:20,909 Really? Yes! 475 00:19:20,909 --> 00:19:22,661 You hear that? We're free. 476 00:19:22,661 --> 00:19:25,080 Okay, well, if you're going to have a belly button shirt, 477 00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:26,415 I'm going to have a belly button shirt. 478 00:19:26,415 --> 00:19:27,666 What do you think of this guy? 479 00:19:27,666 --> 00:19:29,209 And... "Pa-zow!" 480 00:19:29,209 --> 00:19:31,795 The new season of belly button shirts has arrived. 481 00:19:31,795 --> 00:19:34,339 No, no, no. You're not doing it right. 482 00:19:34,339 --> 00:19:37,259 When kids are little, they wear whatever we tell them. 483 00:19:37,259 --> 00:19:40,345 But gradually, they express themselves through hard won battles 484 00:19:40,345 --> 00:19:42,264 with snow pants they refuse to put on 485 00:19:42,264 --> 00:19:44,808 and Halloween costumes they refuse to take off. 486 00:19:44,808 --> 00:19:47,561 Before you know it, you're looking at your kids like my dad looked at me 487 00:19:47,561 --> 00:19:50,814 in my "Meat Puppets" T-shirt and an infected eyebrow ring. 488 00:19:50,814 --> 00:19:53,567 Fashion comes and goes. What are they doing? 489 00:19:53,567 --> 00:19:56,195 Clothes will be important to your kids and that's okay. 490 00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:58,238 What's really important is what's underneath. 491 00:19:58,238 --> 00:19:59,907 Belly buttons. 492 00:20:03,327 --> 00:20:04,828 Okay, Mommie needs a half hour more with Felix. 493 00:20:04,828 --> 00:20:08,457 Okay. So, I needed to tell you this dream. 494 00:20:08,457 --> 00:20:10,083 It's so cool. - Okay. 495 00:20:10,083 --> 00:20:12,002 So, me, Vivian! 496 00:20:12,002 --> 00:20:15,214 Was an evil, evil princess. 497 00:20:15,214 --> 00:20:17,299 I lived in an evil castle. 498 00:20:17,299 --> 00:20:21,678 - Okay... - And then, my pet T-Rex came. 499 00:20:23,180 --> 00:20:25,057 Her name was "Bloody." 500 00:20:25,057 --> 00:20:26,642 Her name was "Bloody?" 501 00:20:26,642 --> 00:20:28,810 - Yeah. - Well, I mean, it's a T-Rex. 502 00:20:28,810 --> 00:20:31,939 And I changed my name to "Bloody Princess." 503 00:20:31,939 --> 00:20:34,316 This dream sounds a little... okay. 504 00:20:34,316 --> 00:20:37,653 So, there's this other dream where a tiger was chasing me 505 00:20:37,653 --> 00:20:41,531 and I walked on its back, and I ran across the whole world. 506 00:20:41,531 --> 00:20:43,325 I like this. What do you think the tiger represents? 507 00:20:43,325 --> 00:20:44,743 - So then... - She's going to need another... 508 00:20:44,743 --> 00:20:46,161 I don't know how we got to 40 minutes, 509 00:20:46,161 --> 00:20:47,537 but that's where we're at. 510 00:20:48,664 --> 00:20:51,500 What else you got? 511 00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:53,126 You want to hear one of my dreams? 512 00:20:53,126 --> 00:20:55,003 - Yeah! - You ain't ready. 38618

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