All language subtitles for Children.Ruin.Everything.S03E01.Therapy.1080p.NF.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H.264-FLUX_track3_[eng]

Ugh!

Morris, for your information,
Snoozy's mine!

You're being a burglar.
Say burglar.

Viv, Mommy gave Snoozy
to Morris to help him

get excited for potty training.

Why do you call
yourself Mommy?

I... don't know.

Did you brush your teeth?
- No.

Go on, I asked
you three times.

Ugh!

Oh, well, well, well,
if it isn't Mr.--

- Can I have coffee?
- Scruffy head.

Ah! Blew my timing.

It was not my best.
- What are you saying?

Felix, go brush your hair.
It looks like you got

a scalp massage.
- I can't hear you.

- Remove the headphones.
- Dude, take the headphones off.

Okay, I'm going upstairs now.

He really needs
to work on his sarcasm.

I mean, what was that?

A big part
of parenting

is second-guessing
your parenting.

In avoiding
your parents' mistakes,

sometimes the pendulum swings
too far the other way.

Right.
My parents were hands off,

but maybe I've been
too smothering?

Mm-hmm, my parents
were too strict.

And I let the kids
call me "stinky daddy".

Oh, I came up with
stinky daddy, so uh, that's on me.

I'm not loving this tween
attitude on Felix.

I mean, I'm all for rejecting
authority, just not mine.

Yeah. Viv's seeing
a psychologist,

Morris won't poop in a bucket.

Are we screwing things up?
- What? No!

We got this.
We're good parents.

Hmm.

Guys, Morris has
an egg and a knife.

How did he get the knife?

- I thought we were out of eggs.

- Come here, come here. Oh!
- Morris, come here!

James, the knife, get the knife.

Okay, you get the egg.

Did you get to fill out

Viv's ADHD questionnaire
for her session today?

No.
I haven't started it.

But there's-there's time.

The ADHD assessment
is a complex

and involved process
that really wants us

to fill out like,
a lot of little circles.

Viv is six. I asked her
how she's feeling today,

she said, "Unicorn".
What answers is she
telling the doctor?

Well, Shauna would know.
She's a professional
psychologist.

I'm sure she knows
what Viv means...

- Shauna.
- ...when she says unicorn.

- Oh, Shauna.
- It's just a name.

I mean, she overpronounces
her words.

Thinking-G, feeling-G.

I don't need to hear
the "G" in "ing".

- Okay.
- Thank you. All right.

"Forgets what they're doing,
never, rarely, often, always."

I mean, who doesn't forget
what they're doing?

I forget what I'm doing
in the shower sometimes.

You're probably avoiding
the children.

But Viv forgets what
she's doing often.

See, I would say sometimes.
This is it.

How is a questionnaire
gonna assess Viv?

We're giving different answers.

Now, I have been doing
some reading

about child behaviour and--
- What, wait, when?

Okay. I've been following
parenting accounts on Instagram.

I love Instagram.
So many good TikToks on there.

Viv has trouble
with transitions,

so why don't we support her
by giving her a simple

heads up when
a transition's coming?

Viv, we're leaving
in five minutes!

I can't find
my colouring book!

Why don't you stop
looking for it in two?

What was I looking for?

Okay, go ahead,
put me down for an often.

Yeah, I'm gonna go
ahead and do that.

You wanna show me your
drawings while we wait?

No. Why do we
keep coming here?

Well, sweetie,
Shauna is like a doctor

but for your thoughts
and feelings.

So, this is just a normal
checkup, but for your brain.

When can we get a dog?

Okay, you're not
even listening.

Shauna!

I did the drawings
I told you about.

Exciting-G!
While I was waiting-G for you,

I got your cocoa, Viv.
- Sorry we're late again.

Traffic was stupid.

Ugh, Toronto traffic
is maddening-G.

Yeah. Hey um, can I talk
to you for a moment?

Uh, so I was just wondering
how the evaluation was going?

You know, Viv doesn't
really tell us much.

What she does share
is sometimes made up,

you know, she's invisible,
or she's the president
of the driveway, or...

I'm wondering is the information
you're getting reliable?

I am getting-G information
from a lot of sources,
including-G, you.

Have you done your
questionnaires?

Yeah, I finished 'em.
Sorry they took so long.

- Oh!
- They are...

- Okay.
- Sorry, that one
has coffee on it.

And butter.
Can I just ask,

how do you know what's ADHD
and what's just like, a kid?

I promise, I know
what I'm doing-G.

Oh, so close!

So close.
Can that be the last one?

Go for the Kawhi bounce.
Check this out.

Is this the dagger?

Hey, how come you're
so boring today?

I'm just trying to figure out
what these Gero benefits get me.

I'll tell you what they do
not cover is electrolysis.

And electrolysis is not
what I thought it was.

We think Viv might have ADHD.
Or I do.

Astrid thinks she's too
young to be diagnosed.

When I was a kid,
I was diagnosed as gifted.

- Oh.
- I wasn't.

- Oh no? You...
- The real gifted kids

would bully me in Latin.
It was no bueno.

Really did a number on my head.
Just be careful.

The building is on fire!

'K, so we should
leave then, yeah?

Not literally on fire.
But the flames of progress
will scorch us.

You know Yennefer
from The Witcher?

I... do not.

That kind of fire.

'K, well, speaking
of being burned,

I'm trying to figure out
these Gero benefits and
I was wondering--

This is no time to book
a foot massage, James.

Mr. Gero has hired Fintekoäly

to automate checkouts
at Gero's Groceries.

We could be next.
- What is Fintekoäly?

They're a tech company
from Finland.

- Okay, that checks out.

Gero's wants to replace us
with software.

We will fight
the rise of machines.

We'll eat at our desks, work
through breaks, wear diapers.

- Oh.
- We are gonna outsmart

their artificial intelligence.

Get to work, Beth!

- Oof.
- Starting to feel

a lot like my gifted days.

- How many days was that?
- Like, four.

Man jugglers.

Okay, like some jugglers are
impressive because of danger,

like they're juggling axes
or fire.

Oh, uh, you don't have to take
notes for this, by the way.

Oh, I'm not.
I stopped listening

after you said street magicians
are important.

Just trying to discredit
all of child psychology.

- Is this for work?
- Uh, no.

I'll finish my work later,
after I start it.

I'm trying to find if this
doctor has any bad reviews,

or pharmaceutical ties,
or recorded Karen moments.

I've got an update.

I have an address, tax records,
and I'm her LinkedIn friend.

I'm really starting
to understand this woman.

Okay, I'm looking for some
dirt, not to steal her identity.

Oh, she's so good.
You'd be surprised

how many times
she's catfished me.

- Is it 15?
- It's 15!

What have you learned
about Shauna?

Illegitimate degree?
History of fraud?

Is she always wrong?

She's well liked,
respected, and she donates
to a donkey rescue.

- Aw.
- I know.

But maybe I can find some
dirt on her Spotify.

Ooh!

Sometimes,
we need to have like,

a private conversation
in front of our children.

So, we have
to speak in a coded language
we call Parentuguese.

You guys get it too.
End pieces still avail.

So, I understand
how somebody could think

they have the thing,
but not actually have the thing.

- What thing?
- Felix, finish your dinner.

Viv, come on, sit down, please.
Sit down and finish your dinner.

I was also thinking
about the thing.

Gus' parents let him
drink mochaccinos.

That's insane.

So, at first I thought
S was BS,

but I did some digging
and it turns out

that S knows everything there
is to know about the thing.

Now, S does really like
the Red Hot Chili Peppers,

but I'm willing
to let that one go.

You know, Ennis
thought he had a thing

and he didn't have it.
- Huh?

I mean, it's not the same
thing, but like, still.

- Can I get a thing?
- Can it be a dog?

Viv, back in your seat.

I asked you twice already.
- Ugh.

You know, everyone I work
with has some form of the thing.

And they all say that S is
the best thing for the thing.

Gus says mochaccinos are lit.

Gus says the cutest things
I've ever heard.

- Wow, wow, wow, wow.

Viv, back in your seat.
Sit down.

Why doesn't Morris have
to sit at the table?

Well, because Morris
is in a high chair.

- He's gone.
- What?

He's got the knife
and egg again.

What? How?
Where does he keep
finding the eggs?

Thank you for being-G on time.

We are looking forward
to diving in and listening.

And also talking,
where appropriate.

We're-we're great. Thank you
for... You didn't ask.

I-I'm sorry, I'm just a little
nervous because the...

See, my mother left me
when I was young.

Yeah, ah, ah, ah, ah.

I see you nudging
in your own trauma, Mr. Sneaky.

We're here to talk
about Viv today.

Yes, you're right.

I'll just stuff that back...
back, back, back down.

Um, we're really
looking forward to hearing
your expert opinion.

- So, Viv definitely has ADHD.
- Says who?

My comprehensive
clinical assessment.

Uh, yeah, no,
we're... we're listening.

Yes. So, she is so bright
and personable, okay?

She is very advanced in reading,

she has great humour
and empathy.

But as you can see,
here is the typical range

of behaviour for a kid
her age, okay?

And these spikes here
show where she is classically

a clinical ADHD kid.

Difficulty with
executive functions.

I know the charts
can be confusing.

No, I look at charts
all day, so I, yeah, I see.

Okay.
So, we'll put her in therapy,

um, once a month or once a week.
- You could.

I don't know how much help
that would be at her age.

I would highly recommend meds.

I think you will notice
a huge difference

once we get the correct dosage.
- I'm sorry, no, no.

Absolutely not.
- Well, we said we would listen

to the expert's advice.

But this is brain
altering meds.

Okay, you have
a tough decision

hanging-G over you,
so let's discuss it.

Oh, we're gonna discuss it
so you can talk us into drugs

like we're at one of your
Chili Pepper concerts?

I don't think so.
- All right.

Do you have a method
for making tough decisions?

- Ahem.
- We tend to do

a little bit of a "rock, paper,
scissors" kinda thing.

That we...
- Which we would never do

in a situation like this.
- No, we would not do...

Because the stakes
are so much higher.

Right.

Here we go.

Pancakes!

Yes, this is a remix
version of Mommy's famous

buttermilk pancakes with no
sugar, or flour, or buttermilk.

- What?
- Hmm, and what will this solve?

Well, according
to my research--

- Social media sites?
- Yes, highly reputable
Momfluencers.

- Right, right, right.
- There are certain ingredients

that trigger ADHD symptoms
more than others,

so kids love pancakes,
they're obviously never gonna
taste the difference.

This is egg, banana,
and they're good, I think.

- M'kay.
- This tastes like punishment.

No, instead of being light
and fluffy like a pancake,

these are wet and squishy, mm,
like a... mistake.

- Can I have some maple syrup?
- I don't know.

Does it have sugar in it?
- I hope so.

- I'll just have toast.
- Okay, let's wrap it up.

Come on, guys,
you're gonna be late. Let's go.

But the toast.
- Come on, come on.

- Go on, go on.
- Let's go, let's go, let's go.

I know there are studies
about how ADHD meds work.

How many weird pancake
studies are there?

We don't even know
what the drugs do.

What if they make her
a zombie or not Viv?

Ah, time for a change.

What's all this about?
- Oh, I decided to try
that tapas place.

Well, isn't tapas
like a bunch of little
shared plates for sharing?

Yeah, but I got
the bachelor's tapas.

It's like a bunch of one-night
stands for your mouth.

And I won't be calling
any of them back.

What do you have there?

Oh, I've got a cold,
grey pancake. Wanna share?

Did your kids
make that for you?

Is it Father's Day?
Oh, I gotta text my dad.

No, Viv's got ADHD and
the doctor's recommending meds

and Astrid's not into it.
So, we're trying this thing

where we remove the joy from
our food to see if that helps.

- Pff.
- So, if an optometrist

tells you that you need glasses,
you'd say,

"Thanks for the advice, Doc,

but I think I'll try an enema."

Stupid.

What do you know
about it, Beth?

Yeah, Beth, what do you know?

Try "everything".
I happen to have ADHD,

unlike you two goons. And IBS.

And sometimes depression,
astigmatism, fibromyalgia,

and I'm prone
to getting carsickly.

I've been on meds
practically my whole life.

I wouldn't be here
today without them.

So, do your ADHD meds,
do they like,

turn you into a zombie, at all,
or like, extinguish your spark?

Sorry, what do I look like,
"Girl, Interrupted"?

Do you guys even know
what I do on the weekends?

Hello? I'm a majorette!

You ever seen a zombie
twirl a baton?

Eh, no.

What's the deal, she can just
hear everything we're saying?

Are we screaming?
We're being quiet, right?

It's acoustics,
is that the deal?

Look, if you're so worried
about side effects,

why not test them out
on yourself first.

These wear off
after like, eight hours.

Uh, I'm so sorry.
This is all I had.

I didn't know you'd be
joining us for lunch, Astrid.

I haven't seen you
since your trip to Europe.

I've been practicing
on Duolingo.

I was able to fire people
in four languages.

Sei licenziato, Tommaso

I'm sure that felt very
authentic to Tommaso.

Grazie.

Astrid, do you
have a headache?

Oh, you look like
you have a headache.

That face you're making.

Nope.

Viv's doctor wants us
to give her meds,

which James agrees with,
which is crazy, right?

Totally crazy. I hear
reiki and exercise are best.

You can't sweat out ADHD.

Do you remember Barb Huang,
our vet, who developed

Foreign Accent Syndrome
right after her dental surgery?

- She wasn't really Irish?
- Her daughter had terrible

psoriasis until
she started taking anti-organ
rejecting pills.

Mom, that's not
the same thing.

Why? It's medicine
and it helped her.

Take it from a nurse,
drugs work.

- Hey, sorry I am late.

I was recruiting some hotshot
crocheters at a retirement home.

Bo, when you had your mental
breakdown, did you take drugs?

Thanks for
bringing it up. Yes.

- Oh.
- But they didn't work.

Meditation, peyote,
and a trip to Joshua Tree

was what realigned my life.

The right meds are effective.

But with side effects.

Stop complicating
this with nuance.

Okay, I should go.
- Okay.

Can I take some
of this meat home?

I'll get you a doggy bag.

My mouth is so dry.

Ennis?

You feel a bit clammy,
a bit headachey?

Actually, I've never felt
quite so clear in my life.

I don't know why I was avoiding
doing work for so long.

It is very interesting,
and a little bit fun.

My stomach hurts.
I don't think Beth's meds
are agreeing with me.

Gentlemen. Thank you
for taking the threat

of Fintekoäly seriously
and working so hard today.

Marla, I am in the zone.

You're gonna have to stay
in the zone for the next

few months at least.
I'm proud of you, Ennis.

Proud of him?
His parents aren't
even proud of him.

What are you looking at?
Get back to work.

How's the science experiment
going, boys?

- I feel gross.
- Well, that'll teach you

to take meds that
aren't prescribed for you.

You're the one
who said it was okay.

Hey, how long does
this medication take
before it wears off?

I'd like to go pick up some of
those intellectual babes in HR

before I turn back
into a pineapple.

Ooh, I think it might have
already happened, my man.

- Oh.
- There he is.

Oh, I've just been
typing gibberish.

- You awake?
- Yeah.

I'm just thinking about
all the ways we could
screw up Viv's life,

before I close my eyes and have
actual nightmares about it.

I know! I can't figure it
out either. I feel awful.

But also, I might be coming down

from those ADHD meds,
so I'm not sure.

So, after being a guinea pig,

you still wanna give her
the meds?

I don't know,
I don't know, I don't know.

Maybe they'll help her?

Yeah.

I know, it just feels so wrong.

Hi. I can't sleep.

I think it's because
I took a sip of Dad's
coffee this morning.

I didn't give it to him.
You know how many half-finished

cups of coffee
we leave around here?

- Is Viv sick?

I heard you guys talking
about medicine.

No, everything's fine, pal.

Yeah, I mean, there are
some geopolitical problems
happening globally.

- James.
- Yeah.

Viv got moved
to the front of the class

at school for being
a distraction.

She thinks she's in trouble.
- She's not in trouble.

Everything is fine, pal.
- Mm-hmm.

You're a good brother
for being worried about
your sister, you know that?

Come here.

Eh, there we go, there we go.

There it is, there it is.

Put an arm up, there.
- Oh, okay, okay. Yeah.

Okay, okay.

Can I listen to a podcast?

Uh, no, you can go to bed.

But I will not check on you
for 10 minutes.

He hugged back.
- Still our little guy.

- Yeah.
- Stinks a bit.

Ah, man!

- One!
- Oh!

Oh, my God!

Morris is down for his nap
which gives us between

10 and 200 minutes
to play a board game
or shoot a movie trailer.

- Movie trailer!
- Viv, what do you wanna do?

Uh, I didn't hear
what you said.

That's okay, um...
- That's okay.

Seriously?

This is why I keep getting
in trouble at school.

Why do I keep doing this?!
- Hey, hey.

You're not in trouble, kiddo.

Um, okay.

So, Viv, remember when
you went to see Shauna,

you guys were playing the games?
- And drink hot chocolate.

She learned something
about you that might um,
change things a bit.

- Viv, you have ADHD.
- It's a totally normal thing.

It just means that your brain
works a bit differently.

I know that.
Four kids in my class have it.

Six kids in my class have it.

And this one kid has anxiety.
And this other kid has red hair.

Okay. Um, do you have
any questions?

Do you know if egg rolls
have eggs in them?

Okay, I think she's handling
this pretty well.

- Can I be done the meeting?
- Me too.

- Okay.
- Okay, kids, yeah.

They handled that better
than we did.

Oh, we are handling it great.

Just trying to help Viv
navigate a thing that
we barely understand.

Yeah, but I actually have an
idea that'll help Viv navigate,

that you're not gonna like.
- Is it pills?

It's worse?

Sometimes, you ask yourself,
am I doing something wrong-G.

No! The frontal lobe
is responsible

for our executive
functions, okay?

And is underdeveloped
in people with ADHD.

So, it is the parents' job

to act as the executive
functioning-G for the child.

The brain continues
to develop until age 28.

That, that actually
makes sense

because I was very
self-destructive until I was 28.

Which is about the time
my mother came back--

No, no, no.
Mommy, no.

- Yep, yep, yep.
- But destruction can lead

to a very rough road.

But also breeds creation.

You know who said that?

Red Hot Chili Peppers.

Yeah, they also said
Catholic schoolgirls rule.

Pretty gross.
- Okay, we don't...

we don't need to...
- All right, I'm gonna give you

some tools and techniques
to help Viv realize
her full potential.

The first technique
is called scaffolding-G.

Scaffolding-G.

Okay, so you take all of
the things in your house.

It's a good thing kids
don't need perfect parents,

because there aren't any.
Exactly.

I let Felix watch
part of a John Wick movie

before bed once
and he was not ready.

What?
Why did you do that, James?

Of course he wasn't
ready for John Wick.

I'm just illustrating
that we are not perfect.

Oh, yeah!

Anyway, you learn
from your mistakes.

And what you do learn
is mostly useless

for the next kid 'cause they're
a completely different person.

But you get better
at learning.

And we're the biggest
majorette coalition
in the province.

- No way!
- We're thinking of unionizing.

- Oh wow, is that possible?
- Yeah, well, if there wasn't

people dragging us back,
like Brenda.

Brenda, who steals
peoples' routines.

And her routine
is really hack,

even though she stole it
from me. It wasn't hack
when I was doing it.

Like, she wrecked it
because she stole it from you?

Yeah, because she's putting
her Brenda spin on it.

You know what?
It's really actually getting
really dramatic around there.

And you'd think, with all
the batons twirling around,

there'd be a few more
broken legs, but there's not.

But there will be.
- You know...

Lunch has been over for hours.

But anyway, Gail, my mentor.
She's gonna get us to nationals.

Right. Is she the one
that went missing?

- No, that was my first mentor.
- Sorry.

And I have been
cleared for that.

I've got an alibi.
- I believe you.

- I shouldn't say too much here.
- Okay.