Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:04,879
This programme contains discriminatory
language and very strong language
2
00:00:04,880 --> 00:00:06,679
Mega's gonna kill you.
No matter what happens,
3
00:00:06,680 --> 00:00:08,719
you gotta stay in this cell.
I have to stay in this cell!
4
00:00:08,720 --> 00:00:10,559
You gotta stay in this
cell. I have to stay in...!
5
00:00:10,560 --> 00:00:13,319
The only way to stay safe is stay in
this cell. Are you gonna look after me?
6
00:00:13,320 --> 00:00:15,440
Yeah. Aww! You're
leaving the cell.
7
00:00:18,640 --> 00:00:21,079
Oh... my God.
8
00:00:21,080 --> 00:00:22,559
Ahhh!
9
00:00:22,560 --> 00:00:23,920
Pathetic.
10
00:00:28,840 --> 00:00:33,520
And that's when I knew every
choice has consequences...
11
00:00:36,400 --> 00:00:38,639
Oh, Mega, are you
good, my brother?
12
00:00:38,640 --> 00:00:42,359
I will be, when I get
my hands on Mobeen.
13
00:00:42,360 --> 00:00:44,279
But he never leaves his cell.
14
00:00:44,280 --> 00:00:46,479
You've gotta get him to
leave his cell, Chippy.
15
00:00:46,480 --> 00:00:48,119
I'm running outta favours, Mega.
16
00:00:48,120 --> 00:00:51,000
You run outta favours when
I SAY you run outta favours.
17
00:00:52,560 --> 00:00:53,919
HE SIGHS
18
00:00:53,920 --> 00:00:55,520
This fucking toenail...
19
00:00:57,640 --> 00:00:59,880
HE GRUNTS
20
00:01:01,040 --> 00:01:03,040
Excuse me for a minute, Chippy.
21
00:01:04,280 --> 00:01:05,840
TEARING
22
00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:13,719
That's how you deal with
irritating little bastards.
23
00:01:13,720 --> 00:01:15,279
You get them out.
24
00:01:15,280 --> 00:01:16,599
You know what I mean?
25
00:01:16,600 --> 00:01:18,160
Yeah.
26
00:01:21,200 --> 00:01:24,720
Get Mobeen out of his
cell and bring him to me.
27
00:01:28,011 --> 00:01:33,199
You see this game you're
playing, yeah? It's putting me
28
00:01:33,200 --> 00:01:35,319
in mortal danger. You
love the madness, Moonpig.
29
00:01:35,320 --> 00:01:36,759
I do not.
30
00:01:36,760 --> 00:01:38,959
There's a one-in-six chance
of you actually dying,
31
00:01:38,960 --> 00:01:41,239
and they're pretty good
odds. Listen to me, eh?
32
00:01:41,240 --> 00:01:43,359
I'm not some plump
yet fat, sexy stallion
33
00:01:43,360 --> 00:01:44,759
whose life you're
betting on, OK?
34
00:01:44,760 --> 00:01:46,319
If something happens
to me, then you,
35
00:01:46,320 --> 00:01:48,359
you've got the blood of a
brown man on your hands.
36
00:01:48,360 --> 00:01:50,079
Yeah, it won't be
the first time.
37
00:01:50,080 --> 00:01:52,959
Relax. You're with an
officer. You'll be fine.
38
00:01:52,960 --> 00:01:55,999
Every time I come out
here, you facilitate me
39
00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:58,679
getting spanked within an
inch of my life every day.
40
00:01:58,680 --> 00:02:01,199
"Yeah, Mobeen, you
love it, tssh!"
41
00:02:01,200 --> 00:02:03,679
WHIMPERS You're
giving me tingles.
42
00:02:03,680 --> 00:02:04,999
Uh-uh.
43
00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:07,999
Look, just make sure you have a
nice little chat with Memory Stick,
44
00:02:08,000 --> 00:02:09,439
so we can get to
calm, all right?
45
00:02:09,440 --> 00:02:11,439
What the fuck am I supposed
to talk to him about -
46
00:02:11,440 --> 00:02:12,999
Avril Lavigne? You what?
47
00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:15,519
Yeah, that's what Shady
says he's into, man.
48
00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:16,999
Shady's a mad lad.
49
00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:19,239
Ey, he's a mad lad,
but he's MY mad lad.
50
00:02:19,240 --> 00:02:21,040
I love Asian uncles and aunties.
51
00:02:22,280 --> 00:02:23,399
All of 'em?
52
00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:24,879
Even the Tory ones?
53
00:02:24,880 --> 00:02:28,479
Are they even Asian? Yes! Good.
That's what I was thinking as well.
54
00:02:28,480 --> 00:02:30,799
I think they're like the bad
guys at the end of Scooby-Doo.
55
00:02:30,800 --> 00:02:33,159
They just grab them
brown masks and...
56
00:02:33,160 --> 00:02:35,359
"Send them all to Rwanda."
57
00:02:35,360 --> 00:02:37,159
And reveal the many
faces of Satan.
58
00:02:37,160 --> 00:02:38,719
Harsh...
59
00:02:38,720 --> 00:02:40,479
..on Satan...
60
00:02:40,480 --> 00:02:43,080
I really like you. Did
I ever tell you that?
61
00:02:46,920 --> 00:02:49,439
Memory Stick's last
check-up's our last chance.
62
00:02:49,440 --> 00:02:52,090
We get him to cooperate
now, everything's pattered.
63
00:02:52,091 --> 00:02:56,959
Hello, Doc. I need a few
minutes with Colin Bigginson.
64
00:02:56,960 --> 00:02:58,599
He's had his last check-up,
65
00:02:58,600 --> 00:03:01,279
and Officer Sajid personally
escorted him back to his cell.
66
00:03:01,280 --> 00:03:03,719
Bloody Sajid. I'll throttle
the little pillock.
67
00:03:03,720 --> 00:03:06,480
I can still do Mobeen, if
you just give us some space.
68
00:03:10,240 --> 00:03:12,199
Take a seat, Mobeen. Thank you.
69
00:03:12,200 --> 00:03:14,919
How is the eye getting
on? Look up for me.
70
00:03:14,920 --> 00:03:16,799
OK. Watch out for his breath.
71
00:03:16,800 --> 00:03:18,479
It once made a cat faint.
72
00:03:18,480 --> 00:03:20,559
That's a unique bedside manner,
73
00:03:20,560 --> 00:03:22,519
but I like it.
74
00:03:22,520 --> 00:03:25,399
Why are you here? I told
you I don't want you here.
75
00:03:25,400 --> 00:03:26,999
I won't be here long. Why?
76
00:03:27,000 --> 00:03:29,399
Nida's got me a
PROPER placement.
77
00:03:29,400 --> 00:03:30,999
Tell him where it is.
78
00:03:31,000 --> 00:03:32,679
Sharjah in the UAE.
79
00:03:32,680 --> 00:03:34,840
Are you joking? You got her...
80
00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:37,320
Sharjah!
81
00:03:38,400 --> 00:03:39,959
Come on!
82
00:03:39,960 --> 00:03:42,119
I can't believe
it. When do you go?
83
00:03:42,120 --> 00:03:43,359
Tonight. Huh?
84
00:03:43,360 --> 00:03:46,599
Someone got Covid and dropped
out last minute, so I'm in.
85
00:03:46,600 --> 00:03:48,759
Nah, please don't go.
86
00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:51,239
HE SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY
Hello, haramzada.
87
00:03:51,240 --> 00:03:52,839
Uncle! What are you doing here?
88
00:03:52,840 --> 00:03:55,920
Prison chaplain gives the
last rite to a dying man.
89
00:03:56,960 --> 00:03:59,840
Oh. He can bet he's not
getting any more sicker.
90
00:04:03,960 --> 00:04:05,839
Did you kill him?
91
00:04:05,840 --> 00:04:07,359
What are you doing here -
92
00:04:07,360 --> 00:04:09,079
breast reduction surgery?
93
00:04:09,080 --> 00:04:11,439
Breast reduction...?! Excuse me.
94
00:04:11,440 --> 00:04:14,519
I'm just getting
checked out by Doctor...
95
00:04:14,520 --> 00:04:16,999
..checked UP by
Doctor Nida medically.
96
00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:18,239
It's all professional, yeah.
97
00:04:18,240 --> 00:04:19,560
Kinky boy.
98
00:04:20,920 --> 00:04:24,999
Aqsa, if you're going to UAE,
I have one piece of advice.
99
00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:26,079
Yeah?
100
00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:28,639
Go and visit Hajar
Mountain caves.
101
00:04:28,640 --> 00:04:30,919
Huh? They are very beautiful,
102
00:04:30,920 --> 00:04:33,039
very dark and bad.
103
00:04:33,040 --> 00:04:34,679
You must sleep in them.
104
00:04:34,680 --> 00:04:35,919
Don't sleep in THEM.
105
00:04:35,920 --> 00:04:38,880
Sleeping in caves never
did me any harm, bastard.
106
00:04:43,360 --> 00:04:46,080
CHATTER
107
00:04:54,640 --> 00:04:56,160
Mobeen...
108
00:05:00,760 --> 00:05:02,399
Moonbeam!
109
00:05:02,400 --> 00:05:03,879
Oi, he's asleep!
110
00:05:03,880 --> 00:05:05,800
Just like I was
until you barged in.
111
00:05:09,840 --> 00:05:11,759
Bastard. Where is he?
112
00:05:11,760 --> 00:05:13,720
Mega's gonna batter
him any second.
113
00:05:15,160 --> 00:05:16,919
Yeah, man, come on.
114
00:05:16,920 --> 00:05:18,399
ARGGH! Agh!
115
00:05:18,400 --> 00:05:20,839
Hold it! What the fuck
are you doing here?
116
00:05:20,840 --> 00:05:22,759
HE TALKS INDISTINCTLY
117
00:05:22,760 --> 00:05:23,999
Are you all right?
118
00:05:24,000 --> 00:05:25,080
Look, dahl.
119
00:05:26,080 --> 00:05:28,119
Oh, dahl!
120
00:05:28,120 --> 00:05:30,319
You scared the
shit outta me, man.
121
00:05:30,320 --> 00:05:32,839
I just wanted to say thank you
for sorting Aqsa's placement.
122
00:05:32,840 --> 00:05:34,119
Please may I sit down?
123
00:05:34,120 --> 00:05:35,640
Yeah, yeah.
124
00:05:42,040 --> 00:05:43,599
How did you make this?
125
00:05:43,600 --> 00:05:45,799
Oh, it was the lads in the
canteen. I got them to make it.
126
00:05:45,800 --> 00:05:47,039
And how did you get in here?
127
00:05:47,040 --> 00:05:48,519
The door was open.
128
00:05:48,520 --> 00:05:50,159
Mm, I'm pretty sure
the door was locked.
129
00:05:50,160 --> 00:05:51,999
I definitely didn't break in.
130
00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:54,320
Look, this is
really nice, but...
131
00:05:57,840 --> 00:05:59,639
Is this Pot Noodle in here?
132
00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:00,800
Yeah, a bit.
133
00:06:02,040 --> 00:06:05,159
Listen, I don't know how
to break this down to you,
134
00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:09,439
but it would be unprofessional
for me to eat this pot...
135
00:06:09,440 --> 00:06:10,600
..dahl.
136
00:06:11,880 --> 00:06:13,280
I'm sorry. I'll just go.
137
00:06:25,400 --> 00:06:27,720
Nah, nah, thank you.
138
00:06:32,360 --> 00:06:34,559
Ooh.
139
00:06:34,560 --> 00:06:35,999
How does it tastes?
140
00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:38,200
That tastes like...
TALKS WITH MOUTH FULL
141
00:06:39,160 --> 00:06:40,400
Whew.
142
00:06:42,560 --> 00:06:45,279
Obviously, this hasn't
quite worked out, has it?
143
00:06:45,280 --> 00:06:48,079
But... in the real world,
144
00:06:48,080 --> 00:06:49,719
out there,
145
00:06:49,720 --> 00:06:52,879
I would take you to get the
best dahl on planet Earth, yeah?
146
00:06:52,880 --> 00:06:55,479
There's this place
called Raja's Nicy Spicy.
147
00:06:55,480 --> 00:06:57,319
I've heard. What?!
148
00:06:57,320 --> 00:06:58,519
I actually wanna go there.
149
00:06:58,520 --> 00:07:01,639
Yeah, well, I've just technically
offered to take you there.
150
00:07:01,640 --> 00:07:04,519
I'm out soon, so, I mean, maybe?
151
00:07:04,520 --> 00:07:05,839
When I'm out?
152
00:07:05,840 --> 00:07:06,959
As friends?
153
00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:08,519
Do you know what? Mm?
154
00:07:08,520 --> 00:07:09,959
As a friend,
155
00:07:09,960 --> 00:07:11,679
I'd be down with that.
156
00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:12,919
OK.
157
00:07:12,920 --> 00:07:14,160
Cool.
158
00:07:15,440 --> 00:07:17,479
Well, well, well.
159
00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:20,439
Turns out someone
CAN leave their cell.
160
00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:21,839
Swear down.
161
00:07:21,840 --> 00:07:23,640
Man like Mobeen.
162
00:07:25,520 --> 00:07:27,240
Curry - you want some of this?
163
00:07:38,151 --> 00:07:42,999
We need to get that info
out of Memory Stick's head
164
00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:44,759
and into my hands.
SHE CLEARS THROAT
165
00:07:44,760 --> 00:07:46,759
Listen, if I see one more
scatter cushion in here,
166
00:07:46,760 --> 00:07:48,239
there'll be trouble. Boss.
167
00:07:48,240 --> 00:07:49,919
Mobeen...
168
00:07:49,920 --> 00:07:51,439
..Nathaniel...
169
00:07:51,440 --> 00:07:52,879
..I need you your help.
170
00:07:52,880 --> 00:07:54,319
Nay, nay, nay, Governor.
171
00:07:54,320 --> 00:07:56,599
You are not looking at our
lulis in the shower again.
172
00:07:56,600 --> 00:07:57,880
It's not that.
173
00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:00,759
It's Jamal.
174
00:08:00,760 --> 00:08:02,479
He's in a bad way.
175
00:08:02,480 --> 00:08:05,039
Jamal's a good brother.
What's happened?
176
00:08:05,040 --> 00:08:08,119
He's refusing to leave his cell, and
he's threatening to hurt himself.
177
00:08:08,120 --> 00:08:11,159
His wife says she's gonna
stop him seeing the kids.
178
00:08:11,160 --> 00:08:14,919
So, what we need is a really
brilliant trained listener
179
00:08:14,920 --> 00:08:16,519
to go into his cell.
180
00:08:16,520 --> 00:08:19,440
Somebody at the top of their
game. The best we've got.
181
00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:24,400
And I'm looking at you, Mobeen.
182
00:08:26,360 --> 00:08:28,760
Will you get on with
it? Cos he needs you.
183
00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:34,840
DOOR BANGS
184
00:08:36,520 --> 00:08:38,439
What's up?
185
00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:40,519
The thing is, if you spend
time sorting out Jamal,
186
00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:42,159
you can't get to
Memory Stick, can ya?
187
00:08:42,160 --> 00:08:43,519
We are so close to getting Khan,
188
00:08:43,520 --> 00:08:45,559
and if you run into Mega,
he's gonna fuck you up.
189
00:08:45,560 --> 00:08:47,959
Forget about Mega for a
minute. Jamal needs help.
190
00:08:47,960 --> 00:08:49,199
He needs OUR help.
191
00:08:49,200 --> 00:08:52,359
You're willing to put your neck
on the line for any old inmate,
192
00:08:52,360 --> 00:08:55,000
when you know Mega's out
there waiting for ya?
193
00:08:56,840 --> 00:08:58,480
It's not any old inmate.
194
00:08:59,960 --> 00:09:02,720
He's a good brother,
and he needs my help.
195
00:09:10,680 --> 00:09:12,240
Don't look at me like that.
196
00:09:13,520 --> 00:09:15,199
Mobeen, good luck, yeah?
197
00:09:15,200 --> 00:09:17,519
All the best, yeah?
Good luck, bro.
198
00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:20,079
You've got this, Mobeen.
199
00:09:20,080 --> 00:09:21,640
Jamal needs you.
200
00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:42,199
Yo.
201
00:09:42,200 --> 00:09:44,599
No, no, no!
202
00:09:44,600 --> 00:09:46,599
Mega, stop, bro.
203
00:09:46,600 --> 00:09:48,039
I beg your pardon, Chips?
204
00:09:48,040 --> 00:09:50,000
It's not about you and him.
205
00:09:51,520 --> 00:09:52,879
It's about Jamal.
206
00:09:52,880 --> 00:09:54,439
Very honourable.
207
00:09:54,440 --> 00:09:55,839
But I don't give a shit.
208
00:09:55,840 --> 00:09:57,880
Well, I give a shit.
209
00:10:00,480 --> 00:10:02,719
Oh, listen, little man.
210
00:10:02,720 --> 00:10:04,039
No, you listen to me,
211
00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:05,679
you big, useless dosser.
212
00:10:05,680 --> 00:10:07,399
Ooh.
213
00:10:07,400 --> 00:10:10,319
You will get back to
your cell immediately.
214
00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:12,079
Sorry, you must be
out of your f...
215
00:10:12,080 --> 00:10:13,839
Shut your mouth.
216
00:10:13,840 --> 00:10:16,319
I run this wing.
217
00:10:16,320 --> 00:10:18,239
You know what they
say, don't ya, huh?
218
00:10:18,240 --> 00:10:21,400
The bigger the lad,
the smaller the brain.
219
00:10:22,440 --> 00:10:24,439
MOBEEN TALKS OFF-SCREEN
220
00:10:24,440 --> 00:10:27,439
He's gonna fist your bunda
into another universe.
221
00:10:27,440 --> 00:10:29,279
Go back to cell now.
222
00:10:29,280 --> 00:10:30,560
Yeah, you go...
223
00:10:33,160 --> 00:10:35,919
Fee-fi-fo-fum,
224
00:10:35,920 --> 00:10:37,359
look at me,
225
00:10:37,360 --> 00:10:39,000
I'm a big, hairy lun.
226
00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:43,799
You're gonna be sorry for this
little show you just put on.
227
00:10:43,800 --> 00:10:45,919
Yeah? Back to your cell.
228
00:10:45,920 --> 00:10:47,800
You're boring, mate.
229
00:10:53,520 --> 00:10:55,120
Thank you, Sajid, thank you.
230
00:10:56,600 --> 00:10:57,959
Look at me.
231
00:10:57,960 --> 00:10:59,839
Thank you. Thank you.
232
00:10:59,840 --> 00:11:01,839
LOUD WHISTLE
233
00:11:01,840 --> 00:11:03,719
Hey, Mobeen, come on.
He's gone. He's gone.
234
00:11:03,720 --> 00:11:05,520
CHATTER
235
00:11:08,160 --> 00:11:10,719
Oh, my God, will
you leave me alone?!
236
00:11:10,720 --> 00:11:12,919
I don't wanna talk to you, OK?
237
00:11:12,920 --> 00:11:15,399
You are an insufferable,
incorrigible piece of shit.
238
00:11:15,400 --> 00:11:16,960
You're obsessed with me. Colin!
239
00:11:18,080 --> 00:11:19,480
Not now.
240
00:11:23,840 --> 00:11:25,319
Oh, yes, JJ.
241
00:11:25,320 --> 00:11:26,880
Give us a minute, my bro, yeah?
242
00:11:28,120 --> 00:11:29,719
Yo, salaam, Jamal.
243
00:11:29,720 --> 00:11:33,959
Go away, Mobes. I don't want a
lecture from you. Come on, man.
244
00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,160
At least give your
boy salaam. Come on.
245
00:11:38,080 --> 00:11:39,639
My bad. Salaam.
246
00:11:39,640 --> 00:11:41,320
Salaam. There you are.
247
00:11:46,040 --> 00:11:49,280
Jamal, I got something
serious to tell you.
248
00:11:52,560 --> 00:11:54,399
Harry Maguire is shit.
249
00:11:54,400 --> 00:11:56,759
Did you see man at the weekend?!
250
00:11:56,760 --> 00:11:58,639
He's a dead baller, bro.
251
00:11:58,640 --> 00:12:02,160
When his mum gave birth to him, she
gave birth to one human own goal.
252
00:12:02,161 --> 00:12:05,239
How do you think
that makes man feel
253
00:12:05,240 --> 00:12:07,400
when he sees that
stuff on social media?
254
00:12:09,440 --> 00:12:12,120
You're behaving like one
insensitive dickhead.
255
00:12:20,960 --> 00:12:22,440
How you really feeling, bro?
256
00:12:25,640 --> 00:12:28,799
My missus says I can't
see my kids anymore.
257
00:12:28,800 --> 00:12:30,440
How would YOU feel?
258
00:12:31,680 --> 00:12:32,999
I ain't ever met your kids.
259
00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:34,199
Are you dumb?
260
00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:36,250
How would you feel if
it was your sister?
261
00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:43,759
That could never
happen. Come on, bro.
262
00:12:43,760 --> 00:12:45,200
Well, it's happened to me.
263
00:12:46,480 --> 00:12:48,200
Without my kids...
264
00:12:49,560 --> 00:12:51,840
..I don't wanna be here anymore.
265
00:12:59,800 --> 00:13:03,759
J, look, you know
where we're from.
266
00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:06,240
OK, with these things,
we just have to man up.
267
00:13:07,400 --> 00:13:09,640
This is why man
don't say anything.
268
00:13:09,641 --> 00:13:13,279
I'm over here talking about
wanting to kill myself,
269
00:13:13,280 --> 00:13:14,880
and you're telling me to man up.
270
00:13:16,760 --> 00:13:18,760
It didn't work.
271
00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:21,800
Now what?
272
00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:25,240
Huh?
273
00:13:34,800 --> 00:13:36,359
Where is Mobeen?
274
00:13:36,360 --> 00:13:38,599
Oh, he's helping Jamal
at the moment, Uncle.
275
00:13:38,600 --> 00:13:40,759
This is MY job to help people.
276
00:13:40,760 --> 00:13:42,719
I get paid overtime for this.
277
00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:45,479
Just leave him to it,
yeah? He's a good lad.
278
00:13:45,480 --> 00:13:46,719
He knows what he's doing.
279
00:13:46,720 --> 00:13:48,999
No, I will remove him
and send him back.
280
00:13:49,000 --> 00:13:50,679
I want my overtime money.
281
00:13:50,680 --> 00:13:53,599
No, you stay in the cell.
282
00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:56,319
Nate, can you keep an
eye on him, please?
283
00:13:56,320 --> 00:13:57,960
Back in a bit.
284
00:14:01,120 --> 00:14:02,560
Ginseng?
285
00:14:03,640 --> 00:14:05,120
Jamal...
286
00:14:06,920 --> 00:14:08,959
I can imagine how you feel.
287
00:14:08,960 --> 00:14:10,679
Can you?
288
00:14:10,680 --> 00:14:13,320
Can you imagine wanting
to do yourself in?
289
00:14:18,480 --> 00:14:20,559
No.
290
00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:21,960
No, I can't.
291
00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:27,599
I can.
292
00:14:27,600 --> 00:14:30,070
There are lots of people
who wanna kill Moonbeam.
293
00:14:32,320 --> 00:14:34,400
One of them's even in this nick.
294
00:14:37,360 --> 00:14:40,960
But doing himself in - never.
295
00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:44,479
Can you two say Mashallah?
296
00:14:44,480 --> 00:14:46,999
Because you're putting a
lot on me at the moment.
297
00:14:47,000 --> 00:14:48,519
Mashallah. Mashallah.
298
00:14:48,520 --> 00:14:49,800
Thank you.
299
00:14:56,800 --> 00:14:58,970
You know, the first time
I thought about it...
300
00:15:00,680 --> 00:15:02,680
..I made a right
fucking mess of it.
301
00:15:04,600 --> 00:15:06,560
You can close your
mouth, Moonbeam.
302
00:15:08,520 --> 00:15:10,640
It's a long journey, brother.
303
00:15:12,880 --> 00:15:15,400
There are a lot more people
on it than you think.
304
00:15:18,400 --> 00:15:19,760
You're not alone.
305
00:15:24,040 --> 00:15:25,880
You should be the listener.
306
00:15:27,320 --> 00:15:29,559
Nah, mate.
307
00:15:29,560 --> 00:15:32,919
I'm just as bad as
dickhead over here.
308
00:15:32,920 --> 00:15:34,800
I just know how
to talk about it.
309
00:15:36,760 --> 00:15:38,640
And a lotta people don't.
310
00:15:41,160 --> 00:15:43,840
But you know where
I am if you need me.
311
00:15:45,920 --> 00:15:47,120
Safe, bro.
312
00:15:54,080 --> 00:15:56,119
Now feel like a
good time to hug?
313
00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:57,880
Piss off. Do one.
314
00:16:09,280 --> 00:16:11,280
Safe, gents.
315
00:16:12,480 --> 00:16:13,999
Bravo.
316
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:15,399
Oh, leave off, will ya?
317
00:16:15,400 --> 00:16:16,919
No.
318
00:16:16,920 --> 00:16:18,559
I heard everything.
319
00:16:18,560 --> 00:16:20,720
You're not a complete
cretin, are you?
320
00:16:22,080 --> 00:16:24,000
I know what you're after.
321
00:16:24,001 --> 00:16:27,479
I'll give you the information
you want about Khan.
322
00:16:27,480 --> 00:16:29,719
What?! What?
323
00:16:29,720 --> 00:16:32,839
The financial records,
the business details,
324
00:16:32,840 --> 00:16:34,479
the list of bent coppers.
325
00:16:34,480 --> 00:16:36,639
Why? Not why - yes!
326
00:16:36,640 --> 00:16:38,879
Thank you. What are
you asking why for?
327
00:16:38,880 --> 00:16:40,879
Look, I can't keep
living like this.
328
00:16:40,880 --> 00:16:42,319
I'm gonna end up like Jamal.
329
00:16:42,320 --> 00:16:43,759
You're a good dude.
330
00:16:43,760 --> 00:16:45,039
Really?
331
00:16:45,040 --> 00:16:46,719
He's not an incel. What?
332
00:16:46,720 --> 00:16:49,679
He thought maybe you were an
incel, and I said you weren't.
333
00:16:49,680 --> 00:16:51,879
Incel?! That's a weird
thing for you to say.
334
00:16:51,880 --> 00:16:54,399
But seriously, this
means you can finally get
335
00:16:54,400 --> 00:16:56,720
justice for your friend, Eight.
336
00:16:58,000 --> 00:16:59,639
How do you know Eight?
337
00:16:59,640 --> 00:17:01,600
I went to uni with
his older brother.
338
00:17:02,920 --> 00:17:04,959
Me and Nine were pretty close.
339
00:17:04,960 --> 00:17:07,439
You must've gone to Cambridge
with him. I did, yeah.
340
00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:09,320
We met punting down the Cam.
341
00:17:10,600 --> 00:17:13,519
I don't know what he means.
What does he mean? I don't know.
342
00:17:13,520 --> 00:17:14,920
OK, listen...
343
00:17:16,200 --> 00:17:19,960
Just bring it in for a
second, lads, yeah? So...
344
00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:26,160
..how do we get the information out
of this incredible brain of yours...
345
00:17:26,161 --> 00:17:30,399
..and into your hands? Like,
have you got a recording device?
346
00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:33,119
I've got some gear. So, I've got,
like, full body suit, balaclava.
347
00:17:33,120 --> 00:17:34,359
I can meet you in the showers.
348
00:17:34,360 --> 00:17:37,039
No, I was just thinking I'd drop off
the memory stick at your cell later.
349
00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:39,319
How do you mean, drop the mem...?
You're gonna drop yourself
350
00:17:39,320 --> 00:17:42,639
to the cell, and then when you get to the
cell... You're gonna drop yourself to the cell.
351
00:17:42,640 --> 00:17:45,799
I haven't memorised all that. You
think I've memorised all that infor...?
352
00:17:45,800 --> 00:17:47,359
No, it's all on a memory stick.
353
00:17:47,360 --> 00:17:49,959
Not in your head? It's not in
my head. It's not in his head!
354
00:17:49,960 --> 00:17:52,639
Of course. Oh, yeah. That's
like something from a shit film.
355
00:17:52,640 --> 00:17:54,079
Shit film!
356
00:17:54,080 --> 00:17:56,479
The shittest film! What kinda
idiot woulda thought it?
357
00:17:56,480 --> 00:17:59,399
I don't know what kind of idiot
would've thought that! I don't know.
358
00:17:59,400 --> 00:18:02,079
He thought it. Did you think
that? No, he did. Stupid. Stupid!
359
00:18:02,080 --> 00:18:03,839
Just, he's called Memory Stick.
360
00:18:03,840 --> 00:18:05,599
Don't do that again.
361
00:18:05,600 --> 00:18:07,120
But, no, listen. Hey...
362
00:18:08,280 --> 00:18:11,279
You don't know what this means
to ALL of us. Look at me.
363
00:18:11,280 --> 00:18:13,719
What you're doing is
fucking legendary, mate.
364
00:18:13,720 --> 00:18:15,280
Really? Oh!
365
00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:18,440
Aw, special, special.
366
00:18:18,441 --> 00:18:21,399
OK, you know where the
cell is. I do, yeah.
367
00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:23,559
And if we could just bring it
in as well. Oh, oh, that's,
368
00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:26,119
you've done that. I thought it was
just you, me, and him, we could
369
00:18:26,120 --> 00:18:28,359
just kinda hug it out
now. OK. Bless you.
370
00:18:28,360 --> 00:18:31,199
Thanks, Colin. Assalaamu Alaikum,
my brother. Nice to meet you.
371
00:18:31,200 --> 00:18:33,239
See you. Peace be upon
you. Yeah. Hey, Mobeen?
372
00:18:33,240 --> 00:18:34,440
Mm-hm?
373
00:18:37,680 --> 00:18:39,119
COLIN CHUCKLES
374
00:18:39,120 --> 00:18:40,359
Woo!
375
00:18:40,360 --> 00:18:41,799
Oh, in the...!
376
00:18:41,800 --> 00:18:43,719
Tss! Deet! Yep.
377
00:18:43,720 --> 00:18:45,159
That was silly.
378
00:18:45,160 --> 00:18:47,679
I actually really like magic.
I was just in a bad mood.
379
00:18:47,680 --> 00:18:49,399
Oh, yeah, really? Yeah, yeah.
380
00:18:49,400 --> 00:18:51,719
In fact, I know you
don't have much time,
381
00:18:51,720 --> 00:18:54,679
but I do have a bit of a
magic trick to show you.
382
00:18:54,680 --> 00:18:57,719
I'll be so quick. I probably haven't
got time. The police officer said
383
00:18:57,720 --> 00:19:00,639
I haven't got time. Please, Mobeen.
I'm a prison officer. Please.
384
00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:02,359
Just pick a card, any card.
385
00:19:02,360 --> 00:19:04,199
Don't show me. Pick a card.
386
00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:06,239
And that's... King of
clubs. Don't show it to me!
387
00:19:06,240 --> 00:19:08,479
We have to do it again.
Wey! Abracadabra.
388
00:19:08,480 --> 00:19:11,480
Let's go. Help me pick it
up at least. Cheers, mate.
389
00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:14,439
Well done, mate.
We're gonna get Khan.
390
00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:16,839
You've done it. You did
it. You did it. WE did it.
391
00:19:16,840 --> 00:19:19,879
Listen to me, brother. I never said
it before, but I love you, bro.
392
00:19:19,880 --> 00:19:23,079
I love ya, and I feel like
kissing ya. Can I kiss ya?
393
00:19:23,080 --> 00:19:24,559
No. Let me kiss ya, please.
394
00:19:24,560 --> 00:19:26,919
Go on, then, just one.
395
00:19:26,920 --> 00:19:28,439
Come on, Moonbeam.
396
00:19:28,440 --> 00:19:29,760
Next time, just you and him.
397
00:19:32,600 --> 00:19:33,960
Nate!
398
00:19:35,280 --> 00:19:37,720
I tried to stop him, but
he just wouldn't listen.
399
00:19:39,240 --> 00:19:40,799
I'm the Alpha in here.
400
00:19:40,800 --> 00:19:42,679
This is how I resolve disputes.
401
00:19:42,680 --> 00:19:44,479
Such a strong stream.
402
00:19:44,480 --> 00:19:46,879
Next time, I piss in your beard.
403
00:19:46,880 --> 00:19:48,880
ZIP! Ugh!
404
00:19:50,240 --> 00:19:53,199
Hey, he's nearly killed him.
405
00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:54,999
What? Mega.
406
00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:57,719
He beat the shit out of Chippy.
407
00:19:57,720 --> 00:19:59,559
He's unresponsive.
408
00:19:59,560 --> 00:20:01,560
Oh, God. It's my fault.
409
00:20:02,760 --> 00:20:05,359
Mobeen, I know what
you're thinking.
410
00:20:05,360 --> 00:20:08,559
It's all my fault.
Don't get involved.
411
00:20:08,560 --> 00:20:10,879
You're letting the
madness drag you back in.
412
00:20:10,880 --> 00:20:13,039
Don't do it, man.
413
00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:17,039
Nate, I should've fixed this
motherfucker long time...
414
00:20:17,040 --> 00:20:18,440
Mobeen. Mobeen!
415
00:20:40,160 --> 00:20:42,799
You want an apple? Sorry?
416
00:20:42,800 --> 00:20:44,240
I've got satsumas as well.
417
00:20:44,241 --> 00:20:47,239
I've had my
five-a-day, thank you.
418
00:20:47,240 --> 00:20:50,359
Well, you were right - diabetes
will be the death of me.
419
00:20:50,360 --> 00:20:52,560
Natural sugars all the way now.
420
00:20:53,840 --> 00:20:55,320
Come in.
421
00:20:57,120 --> 00:20:58,799
In-in your cell?
422
00:20:58,800 --> 00:21:00,520
Yeah, come into the shark tank.
423
00:21:06,360 --> 00:21:09,480
Ah, Mobeen, Mobeen, Mobeen.
424
00:21:15,000 --> 00:21:16,799
Meg, listen to me.
425
00:21:16,800 --> 00:21:19,210
No, YOU listen! Allah!
YELLS: You listen to me!
426
00:21:22,320 --> 00:21:24,079
I'm sorry, man.
427
00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:26,239
I was speaking and then
you interrupted me.
428
00:21:26,240 --> 00:21:27,479
It's rude to interrupt.
429
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:29,959
It is rude. I apologise
for being rude.
430
00:21:29,960 --> 00:21:33,039
Look, I know you hate me.
I know everyone hates me.
431
00:21:33,040 --> 00:21:34,319
They do.
432
00:21:34,320 --> 00:21:35,680
Ahh, fuck...
433
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:38,840
I think I actually hate myself.
434
00:21:38,841 --> 00:21:41,839
Probably shouldn't
hate yourself.
435
00:21:41,840 --> 00:21:43,479
It's bad for your...
436
00:21:43,480 --> 00:21:45,239
..chakras and... Stop.
437
00:21:45,240 --> 00:21:47,639
You know, right before
I was gonna kill you...
438
00:21:47,640 --> 00:21:48,879
You were gonna kill me?
439
00:21:48,880 --> 00:21:50,239
..I had this thought.
440
00:21:50,240 --> 00:21:53,320
You and me, yeah, we're
actually really alike.
441
00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:57,279
Single mum, dad in
and out of trouble,
442
00:21:57,280 --> 00:21:59,679
then he fucks off, leaves
us to fend for ourselves.
443
00:21:59,680 --> 00:22:01,359
My mum told him to fuck off.
444
00:22:01,360 --> 00:22:03,799
She left him, so...
Well, she WOULD say that.
445
00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:07,279
Mine did. '90s immigrant
mums never left their men.
446
00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:09,520
No, HE walked out on US.
447
00:22:10,520 --> 00:22:11,800
You and I.
448
00:22:13,160 --> 00:22:15,840
You know what the difference
is between you and me?
449
00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:19,680
I'm a prick who
knows he's a prick.
450
00:22:21,040 --> 00:22:23,960
You're a prick who
doesn't know he's a prick.
451
00:22:27,160 --> 00:22:28,279
I know YOU'RE a prick.
452
00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:30,559
You're the prick. No,
you're a prick as well.
453
00:22:30,560 --> 00:22:32,919
You just said it, didn't you?
I'm a prick. That's facts.
454
00:22:32,920 --> 00:22:34,759
You are a prick.
455
00:22:34,760 --> 00:22:37,119
And also, you're a
prick. I don't think so.
456
00:22:37,120 --> 00:22:39,599
Yes! Yes, you see? That, there!
457
00:22:39,600 --> 00:22:42,200
Yeah! That's what
I'm talking about!
458
00:22:43,440 --> 00:22:45,079
See, you love it, you love it -
459
00:22:45,080 --> 00:22:47,919
the chaos, the drama,
the need to be a saviour.
460
00:22:47,920 --> 00:22:51,119
You even put your own people in
harm's way just to be a hero.
461
00:22:51,120 --> 00:22:52,519
I respect that.
462
00:22:52,520 --> 00:22:55,239
I understand that.
463
00:22:55,240 --> 00:22:56,639
You chat shit, man.
464
00:22:56,640 --> 00:22:58,479
Chat shit? Really?
You chat shit.
465
00:22:58,480 --> 00:23:01,319
All you had to do was say
no to that undercover fed.
466
00:23:01,320 --> 00:23:04,119
And instead, what did you say?
467
00:23:04,120 --> 00:23:05,759
"Yes, sahib."
468
00:23:05,760 --> 00:23:08,039
You were nearly done.
You were outta here.
469
00:23:08,040 --> 00:23:09,919
New start, new life.
470
00:23:09,920 --> 00:23:12,600
But you love it too much.
471
00:23:15,480 --> 00:23:17,839
Let's be honest, without
472
00:23:17,840 --> 00:23:19,519
this Paki Robin Hood persona,
473
00:23:19,520 --> 00:23:21,080
who are you, brother?
474
00:23:22,480 --> 00:23:25,720
Just another guy
stacking shelves in B&Q.
475
00:23:28,720 --> 00:23:30,319
Yeah.
476
00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:33,600
You would rather be
dead than be that guy.
477
00:23:36,760 --> 00:23:37,999
We are never
478
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:40,200
going to beat the system.
479
00:23:41,960 --> 00:23:43,960
So, what do you say
we light a fire...
480
00:23:45,760 --> 00:23:47,759
..me and you,
481
00:23:47,760 --> 00:23:50,320
and burn this bastard
to the ground?
482
00:23:51,760 --> 00:23:55,560
Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-h-h!
483
00:23:57,080 --> 00:23:59,719
There will be no
fires on MY watch,
484
00:23:59,720 --> 00:24:01,399
Goliath.
485
00:24:01,400 --> 00:24:02,759
Ah, shit.
486
00:24:02,760 --> 00:24:05,439
So, according to THAT parable,
487
00:24:05,440 --> 00:24:07,600
that would make you...
488
00:24:08,720 --> 00:24:10,880
..what - little David?
489
00:24:12,480 --> 00:24:14,879
Sajid, not... not... David.
490
00:24:14,880 --> 00:24:17,080
What's he talking
about, David? Ah, shit.
491
00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:20,839
Very, very, biblical.
492
00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:22,520
You big f...
493
00:24:24,000 --> 00:24:25,760
Ah, Sajid!
494
00:24:31,680 --> 00:24:33,159
You ready, bro?
495
00:24:33,160 --> 00:24:35,119
Nah, I can't go, man.
496
00:24:35,120 --> 00:24:37,479
Do this crazy shit
you're about to do.
497
00:24:37,480 --> 00:24:39,079
You made a pie?
498
00:24:39,080 --> 00:24:41,279
Nah, but I can get you fruit.
499
00:24:41,280 --> 00:24:43,720
HE LISTS FRUITS
500
00:24:54,120 --> 00:24:57,399
Lads!
501
00:24:57,400 --> 00:24:59,360
We've waited a
long time for this.
502
00:25:00,760 --> 00:25:03,159
Who fancies a fucking riot?!
503
00:25:03,160 --> 00:25:06,080
CHEERING
504
00:25:09,400 --> 00:25:11,040
Yeah!
505
00:25:11,090 --> 00:25:15,640
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
35881
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.