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[ STATIC ]
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[ COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYS ]
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>> ♪ MY DREAMS ARE ALL DEAD AND
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BURIED ♪
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♪ SOMETIMES I WISH THE SUN WOULD
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JUST EXPLODE ♪
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♪ WHEN GOD COMES AND CALLS ME TO
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HIS KINGDOM ♪
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♪ I'LL TAKE ALL YOU SONS OF
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BITCHES WHEN I GO ♪
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[ YODELING ]
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>> Rusty: MY TURN.
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>> Early: HELL NO.
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>> Rusty: MAN, LET ME DRIVE THAT
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THING!
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>> Early: DO NOT TOUCH THE TRIM!
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>> Rusty: HEY, DADDY, I SEE ONE!
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I SEE ONE!
>> Early: ALL RIGHT, NOW.
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CALM DOWN.
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HOLD STEADY NOW.
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LET ME LIGHT THE ARROW.
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AND...
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FIRE!
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[ MAN SCREAMS ]
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[ EXPLOSION ]
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[ SCREAMING CONTINUES ]
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>> Rusty: THAT BUCK KIND OF
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SCREAMS LIKE A MAN.
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>> OW!
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>> Early: HEY, DUMBASS, CAN'T
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YOU SEE WE BOW HUNTING OUT HERE?
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YOU SUPPOSED TO BE WEARING
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BRIGHT-ASS NEON ORANGE!
>> Sheriff: OH, WHOA!
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HOLD IT, EARLY!
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YOU CAN'T BE BOW HUNTING HERE!
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THIS IS A CLOSED SET.
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>> Rusty: OOH!
Y'ALL MAKING ONE A THEM FILMY
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MOVIES?
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LIKE WHAT THEY GOT ON THE TV?
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>> Sheriff: THAT'S RIGHT, RUSTY.
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I'M PART OF THE CREW.
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>> Early: UNH-UNH! NO, SIR!
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Y'ALL AIN'T SHOOTING NO DAMN
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MOVIE ON MY BACK 40!
NOT WITHOUT NO MONETARILY
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COMPULATATION.
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HELL NO!
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>> EXCUSE ME, GUYS.
>> Rusty: OH, MY GOD, DADDY,
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THAT'S TANCE JACKERMAN.
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I SEEN HIM ON THE TV!
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>> YOU KNOW, YOU REMIND ME A LOT
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OF BUBBA BRISCOE.
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IT'S THE CHARACTER I PLAY IN
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THIS FILM.
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HE'S A NE'ER-DO-WELL BLACK SHEEP
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OF THE FAMILY, BUT HE DOES WHAT
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IT TAKES THE PROVIDE FOR HIS
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KIN.
>> Early: I DON'T KNOW NO
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BRISCOE.
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HE FROM LUMPKIN?
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>> HE'S FICTIONAL.
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MAKE-BELIEVE.
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>> Early: LUMPKIN'S REAL.
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JUST ONE TOWN OVER.
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DON'T YOU TRY AND TRICK ME.
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>> WHAT DO YOU HAVE GOING ON FOR
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TONIGHT?
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>> Early: EH, IT'S A PRETTY DAMN
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BUSY EVENING.
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GOT TO INHALE THIS HERE GALLON
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OF MINERAL SPIRITS, THEN WHITTLE
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A STICK.
>> WOULD YOU MIND IF I JUST HANG
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OUT?
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YOU KNOW, SHADOW YOU?
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>> Early: I-IS THAT SOME KIND OF
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WEIRD-ASS HOLLYWOOD SEX THING?
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>> OH, NO, NO, NO.
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I JUST WANT TO SEE WHAT MAKES
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YOU TICK.
>> Rusty: I'VE GOT ME A DEER
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TICK ON MY TAINT THAT'S ABOUT AS
BIG AS A DAMN NICKEL!
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>> Early: HE WANTS TO SEE MY
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TICKS, RUSTY, NOT YOURN!
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>> OF COURSE, YOU'LL BE PAID
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HANDSOMELY FOR YOUR TIME.
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>> Early: YOU LIVE HERE NOW.
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YOU SEE THAT TANCE?
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A SOUTHERN MAN TELLS IT LIKE
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IT IS.
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NOW LET'S GIT! WHOO!
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>> LET'S "GEET." WHOO!
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>> Early: Y'ALL.
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>> "YULL."
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>> Early: NO, IT'S Y'ALL.
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>> "YULL."
>> Early: Y'ALL.
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>> "Y'ERLL."
>> Early: Y'ALL.
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>> Y'ARGLL.
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>> Early: NO "R." HELL NO.
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>> YAM? YAMENS?
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>> Early: WHERE THE HELL'D YOU
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GET THAT?
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>> MAN! IT'S HARDER THAN IT
SOUNDS.
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>> Early: NO, NO, NO.
REPEAT AFTER ME NOW.
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"Y'ALL FIXIN' TO TIE A WHOOPIN'
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ON JUNIOR AN' THEM."
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>> YOU'RE ALL FIXING TO TIE A
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WHOOPING ON JUNIOR AND THEM.
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>> Early: "JUNIOR 'N THEM,"
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DAMN IT! IT'S ONE WORD --
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"JUNIOR 'N THEM!"
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DON'T BREAK IT UP LIKE A NERD.
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>> HOLD ON. LET ME...
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ME ME ME, MI MI MI, MO MO MO...
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>> Early: STOP PRAYING TO YOUR
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JEW GODS.
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PUT THIS IN YOUR MIND AND YOU'LL
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NEVER FORGET IT.
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"SAY 'Y'ALL' WHEN YOU WANT TO
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CALL ON ALL."
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>> SAY Y'ALL WHEN YOU WANT TO
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CALL ON ALL!
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>> Early: YEAH, THERE YOU GO.
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YOU GETTIN' IT!
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>> SAY Y'ALL WHEN YOU WANT TO
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CALL ON ALL!
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>> Early: THERE YOU GO!
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NOW, WHEN YOU'RE MIXIN' WITH A
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VIXEN, YOU SAY "FIXIN'."
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>> I'M FIXIN' TO BE MIXIN' WITH
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A VIXEN!
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>> Early: YOU BEST BE FIXIN' TO
GET YOUR LICKS IN!
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>> WHY -- UNH!
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>> Early: MIGHT HELP YOU LEARN
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THE DICTION.
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'CAUSE I'M FIXIN' TO PUT MY
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"DICTION" TO YOUR VIXEN!
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WHOO!
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>> HE'S FIXIN' TO PUT HIS DICKS
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INTO MY VIXEN!
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>> Early: SUMBITCH, HE'S GOT IT!
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HELL YEAH!
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LET'S CELEBRATE!
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>> WOW! YOU MAKE THAT LOOK EASY.
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>> Early: HERE, YOU TRY.
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>> ALL RIGHT.
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>> Early: WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!
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YOU LOST YOUR MIND?!
THIS IS MY BEER!
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YOU SHOTGUN ONE OF YOURN!
147
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>> OKAY, OKAY, I GUESS WE'LL GO
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BUY SOME BEER FOR ME.
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>> Early: THAT AIN'T HOW YOU DO
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A BEER RUN.
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THIS HERE'S HOW YOU DO A BEER
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RUN!
WHOO!
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>> ALL Y'ALL FIXIN' TO GO DOWN
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ON THE FLOOR!
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>> Early: DAMN! YOU DON'T USE
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"Y'ALL" WHEN YOU TALKIN' TO ONE
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PERSON!
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THIS HERE'S A DAMN INDIVIDUAL!
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AND HE'S GOT A NAME!
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IT'S BOYD!
>> OH, WELL, THANK YOU, EARLY--
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>> Early: SHUT YOUR MOUTH, DIRT!
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NOW GO ON AND FETCH THE BEER
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WHILE I STOMP "BOYD'S" BRAINS
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OUT!
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>> HOW ABOUT A HEFEWEIZEN OR
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A...CHERRY WHEAT?
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>> Early: NO!
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GET THE GOOD STUFF!
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THE TALL CANS!
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>> OH! THE POLICE.
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SHOULD WE STRIP DOWN TO THE
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WAIST AND TRY TO FISTFIGHT THEM,
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OR...
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EARLY?
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HELLO?
>> THIS IS USUALLY ABOUT THE
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TIME HE PASSES OUT DURING THIS
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PROCEDURE.
SAY, MR. JACKERMAN, CAN WE GET A
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PHOTO TOGETHER?
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>> YEAH, SURE, GUY.
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WITHOUT FANS, I WOULDN'T HAVE A
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JOB! [ LAUGHS ]
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WELL, I'D PROBABLY HAVE A JOB.
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>> Sheriff: IS HE ASLEEP YET?
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>> Early: THIS HERE'S
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TANCE JACKERMAN, SO YOU BEST LET
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US BOTH THE HELL OUT OF HERE
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RIGHT NOW!
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>> Sheriff: I KNOW WHO IT IS,
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EARLY.
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I'M JUST TRYING TO BE COOL.
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THEY DON'T LIKE IT WHEN YOU
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TREAT THEM LIKE YOU'RE ALL
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FAMOUS.
>> THAT'S RIGHT.
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JUST TREAT ME LIKE ANY OTHER
195
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COMMON WHITE-TRASH LOWLIFE LIKE
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HIM.
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>> Sheriff: WELL, AS LONG AS
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I'VE GOT YOU IN THERE, LET ME
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PITCH YOU AN IDEA FOR A
200
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SCREENPLAY.
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DON'T SELL THIS NOW, YOU HEAR?
202
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>> I'M JUST AN ACTOR--
203
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>> Sheriff: YOU KNOW THEM MOVIES
204
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WHERE THE GUY GETS CONKED ON THE
205
00:04:44,951 --> 00:04:46,286
HEAD AND HE KIND OF SWITCHES
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IDENTITY WITH A KID?
207
00:04:47,420 --> 00:04:48,454
>> I DID TWO OF THOSE.
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00:04:48,521 --> 00:04:49,689
>> Sheriff: WELL, MY MOVIE'S
209
00:04:49,789 --> 00:04:51,090
KIND OF LIKE THAT, BUT THIS GUY
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00:04:51,157 --> 00:04:54,527
SWITCHES PLACES WITH A MOOSE.
211
00:04:54,627 --> 00:04:57,530
I CALL IT "LOOSE CHANGE."
212
00:04:57,630 --> 00:04:58,698
>> WHY NOT JUST CALL IT
213
00:04:58,798 --> 00:05:00,266
"MOOSE CHANGE"?
214
00:05:00,333 --> 00:05:00,767
>> Sheriff: "MOOSE CHANGE"...
215
00:05:00,833 --> 00:05:02,602
HOT DAMN!
216
00:05:02,669 --> 00:05:03,436
HOW'D I MISS THAT?
217
00:05:03,503 --> 00:05:05,805
TANCE JACKERMAN, IN MY CELL,
218
00:05:05,872 --> 00:05:06,806
WRITING A MOVIE WITH ME!
219
00:05:06,873 --> 00:05:08,641
>> YOU KNOW WHAT?
220
00:05:08,708 --> 00:05:09,776
I THINK I'VE GOT THIS WHOLE JAIL
221
00:05:09,842 --> 00:05:10,777
THING.
222
00:05:10,843 --> 00:05:11,210
WHY DON'T YOU GO AHEAD AND LET
223
00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:12,312
ME OUT?
224
00:05:12,378 --> 00:05:13,279
>> Early: BEST LET MY ASS OUT,
TOO!
225
00:05:14,180 --> 00:05:14,847
HELL, I'M A CONSULTING PRODUCER
ON THIS HERE PROJECT!
226
00:05:15,882 --> 00:05:16,683
>> Sheriff: IT IS ARMED ROBBERY,
227
00:05:16,783 --> 00:05:18,384
AND --
228
00:05:18,484 --> 00:05:19,352
>> LOOK, I CAN TELL YOU'RE A
229
00:05:19,452 --> 00:05:20,553
GOOD COP, AND WE MAY NEED
230
00:05:20,653 --> 00:05:21,287
SOMEONE TO PLAY A COP IN THE
SCENE WHERE THE MONSTER
231
00:05:22,188 --> 00:05:24,490
EVISCERATES A BUNCH OF COPS.
232
00:05:24,557 --> 00:05:26,225
>> Sheriff: YOU THINK I COULD
233
00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:27,226
PLAY A POLICEMAN?
234
00:05:27,327 --> 00:05:28,828
I KNEW THERE WAS A REASON I HAD
235
00:05:28,895 --> 00:05:30,296
THIS UNIFORM!
236
00:05:30,363 --> 00:05:30,963
[ LAUGHS ]
237
00:05:31,030 --> 00:05:32,465
>> Early: [ GROANS ]
238
00:05:32,532 --> 00:05:34,701
HERE, YOU SMELL ON THIS LONG AND
239
00:05:34,801 --> 00:05:35,968
HARD UNTIL THE SPACE-JESUS COMES
240
00:05:36,035 --> 00:05:39,539
DOWN AND TELLS YOU WHO TO PUNCH.
241
00:05:39,639 --> 00:05:40,640
>> I AIN'T "FRIXIN'" TO DO THAT,
242
00:05:40,707 --> 00:05:42,041
EARLY.
243
00:05:42,141 --> 00:05:42,809
[ CHUCKLES ]
I HAVE A PERSONAL-TRAINING
244
00:05:43,710 --> 00:05:45,345
SESSION IN A COUPLE OF HOURS.
245
00:05:45,411 --> 00:05:45,912
LET'S MEET AT MY TRAILER AT 7:30
246
00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:47,680
FOR BREAKFAST.
247
00:05:47,747 --> 00:05:48,748
WE'LL "CHEW SOME FAT."
248
00:05:48,848 --> 00:05:49,549
[ CHUCKLES ]
249
00:05:49,649 --> 00:05:51,017
AND HERE'S 500 BUCKS FOR THE
250
00:05:51,084 --> 00:05:51,684
DAY.
251
00:05:51,751 --> 00:05:52,852
THANKS, BRO. TRUTH.
252
00:05:52,919 --> 00:05:53,720
>> Early: WHOA, NOW!
253
00:05:53,820 --> 00:05:54,721
JUST CAUSE YOU PAY ME DON'T MEAN
254
00:05:54,821 --> 00:05:56,589
YOU CAN LAY ME!
255
00:05:56,689 --> 00:05:57,557
>> I'M GONNA USE THAT!
>> "JUST 'CAUSE YOU PAY ME DON'T
256
00:05:58,391 --> 00:05:59,892
MEAN YOU'RE GONNA LAY ME!"
257
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[ TIRES SCREECHING ]
258
00:06:02,562 --> 00:06:03,730
>> Granny: YOU'RE BRINGING SHAME
259
00:06:03,830 --> 00:06:05,331
UPON THIS HOUSE!
260
00:06:05,398 --> 00:06:06,866
THEM HOLLYWOODERS ONLY AIM TO
261
00:06:06,933 --> 00:06:07,567
JEWITIZE YOU AND HOMOSEXULATE
262
00:06:07,667 --> 00:06:09,202
YOU.
263
00:06:09,268 --> 00:06:10,336
>> Early: SHUT YOUR DAMN
264
00:06:10,403 --> 00:06:11,237
SPERM-GURGLER!
265
00:06:11,337 --> 00:06:12,839
HELL, HE JUST GIVE ME $500 JUST
266
00:06:12,905 --> 00:06:14,607
TO HANG OUT AND BE MYSELF.
267
00:06:14,707 --> 00:06:15,608
WHY CAN'T YOU BE COOL LIKE THAT?
268
00:06:15,708 --> 00:06:17,343
HUH?
269
00:06:17,410 --> 00:06:18,678
>> Granny: WELL, I STILL DON'T
270
00:06:18,745 --> 00:06:20,279
APPROVE, BUT LET'S TAKE THAT
271
00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:21,781
MONEY TO THE "INJUN" CASINO AND
272
00:06:21,881 --> 00:06:24,250
BUY US SOME COCAINE.
273
00:06:24,350 --> 00:06:26,219
>> Sheriff: MY HEAD SHOT.
274
00:06:26,285 --> 00:06:27,687
I CAN HORSEBACK RIDE AND ICE
275
00:06:27,754 --> 00:06:28,721
SKATE.
276
00:06:28,788 --> 00:06:29,922
I DO SEVERAL DIALECTS, AND I'VE
277
00:06:30,022 --> 00:06:31,924
GOT A SPOT-ON ITALIAN.
278
00:06:32,024 --> 00:06:33,426
"MAMA MIA!
279
00:06:33,526 --> 00:06:35,027
THAT'S A SPAGHETTI MEAT-A-BALL!
280
00:06:35,094 --> 00:06:37,864
ME NO LIKE-A OTHER-A RACES!"
281
00:06:37,930 --> 00:06:38,931
>> UH, YEAH. MM.
282
00:06:39,031 --> 00:06:41,367
TELL YOU WHAT, LET'S GO AHEAD
283
00:06:41,434 --> 00:06:42,735
AND TRY THE LINES ON THE PAGE.
284
00:06:42,802 --> 00:06:43,536
>> Sheriff: "WITH-A THE
285
00:06:43,603 --> 00:06:44,604
ITALIAN-A FOR ME TO SAY FOR
286
00:06:44,704 --> 00:06:46,372
YOU?"
287
00:06:46,439 --> 00:06:46,873
>> OH, WITH THE REGULAR ENGLISH,
288
00:06:46,939 --> 00:06:48,541
PLEASE.
289
00:06:48,608 --> 00:06:49,809
>> Sheriff: [ CLEARS THROAT ]
290
00:06:49,909 --> 00:06:50,877
"COP 3. HEROIC.
291
00:06:50,943 --> 00:06:52,545
HOLD FIRM, GUYS.
292
00:06:52,612 --> 00:06:53,212
THAT CREATURE DON'T KNOW WHAT
293
00:06:53,279 --> 00:06:54,814
IT'S UP AGAINST."
294
00:06:54,914 --> 00:06:56,482
>> OKAY.
295
00:06:56,582 --> 00:06:57,483
MAYBE A LITTLE MORE BOLD.
296
00:06:57,583 --> 00:06:58,785
YOU'RE REALLY RALLYING THE
297
00:06:58,885 --> 00:06:59,886
TROOPS, HERE, YOU KNOW?
298
00:06:59,952 --> 00:07:00,987
MONSTER'S COMIN TO GET YOU,
299
00:07:01,087 --> 00:07:01,821
SO...
300
00:07:01,921 --> 00:07:03,389
>> Sheriff: ALL RIGHT. GOT IT.
301
00:07:03,456 --> 00:07:04,223
"COP 3! HEROIC--"
302
00:07:04,290 --> 00:07:05,425
>> YOU DON'T HAVE TO READ THE --
303
00:07:05,491 --> 00:07:06,292
THE CHARACTER NAMES.
JUST, UH -- JUST THE LINES WOULD
304
00:07:06,893 --> 00:07:08,394
BE GREAT.
305
00:07:08,461 --> 00:07:09,796
>> Sheriff: OH, OH, OKAY!
306
00:07:09,896 --> 00:07:11,664
I GOTCHA. ALL RIGHT.
307
00:07:11,764 --> 00:07:12,765
"HOLD FIRM, GUYS.
308
00:07:12,832 --> 00:07:13,766
THAT CREATURE...DON'T KNOW WHAT
309
00:07:13,833 --> 00:07:16,602
IT IS UP AGAINST.
310
00:07:19,806 --> 00:07:21,908
>> OKAY. THAT WAS...WONDERFUL.
311
00:07:21,974 --> 00:07:22,742
THANK YOU.
312
00:07:22,809 --> 00:07:23,943
>> Sheriff: MY ADDRESS IS, UH,
313
00:07:24,010 --> 00:07:24,944
ON THE SHEET, THERE.
314
00:07:25,011 --> 00:07:25,845
>> YEAH, WE -- WE'VE GOT THAT
315
00:07:25,945 --> 00:07:26,913
HERE.
316
00:07:26,979 --> 00:07:27,346
>> Sheriff: "Y'ALL-A GIVE-A ME A
317
00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:28,414
CALL-A.
318
00:07:28,481 --> 00:07:29,115
I DON'T HAVE AN AGENT-A YET-A,
319
00:07:29,182 --> 00:07:31,584
SO DON'T-A FORGET-A TO
320
00:07:31,651 --> 00:07:33,586
REMEMBER-A ME-O."
321
00:07:33,653 --> 00:07:35,488
>> Early: WELL, THERE HE IS --
322
00:07:35,588 --> 00:07:37,423
OL' TANCE -- TANCE JACKERMAN.
323
00:07:37,490 --> 00:07:38,658
>> Granny: WE DO COCAINE DOWN
324
00:07:38,758 --> 00:07:39,425
HERE IN THE SOUTH, SO YOU NEED
325
00:07:39,492 --> 00:07:40,860
TO OBSERVE ME DOING SOME
326
00:07:40,960 --> 00:07:41,627
COCAINE?
GIVE ME ONE OF YOUR
327
00:07:42,595 --> 00:07:43,429
HUNDRED-DOLLAR BILLS.
328
00:07:43,496 --> 00:07:44,764
I NEED YOU TO ROLL IT UP, FILL
329
00:07:44,831 --> 00:07:45,431
IT WITH COCAINE, AND BLOW IT
STRAIGHT UP MY ASS!
330
00:07:46,365 --> 00:07:48,601
>> WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU, BRO?
331
00:07:48,668 --> 00:07:49,969
>> Early: I'VE BEEN BEING MYSELF
332
00:07:50,036 --> 00:07:51,604
FOR TWO DAYS STRAIGHT.
333
00:07:51,671 --> 00:07:52,305
HELL, IT AIN'T MY FAULT YOU
DIDN'T SHOW UP FOR WORK!
334
00:07:53,272 --> 00:07:55,708
>> EARLY, I WAS COUNTING ON YOU
335
00:07:55,808 --> 00:07:56,609
TO BE AN UNDEPENDABLE BLACK
336
00:07:56,676 --> 00:07:58,611
SHEEP FROM THE WRONG SIDE OF THE
337
00:07:58,678 --> 00:07:59,378
TRACKS, AND YOU CAN'T EVEN MAKE
338
00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:02,014
IT TO A BASIC CALL TIME?!
339
00:08:02,114 --> 00:08:03,850
>> Early: I HEAR YOU, BRO, BUT,
340
00:08:03,950 --> 00:08:05,852
LISTEN -- I NEED TODAY'S MONEY
341
00:08:05,952 --> 00:08:07,453
NOW SO I CAN GET BACK MY
342
00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:09,322
TWO-DAYS-AGO MONEY BACK FROM
343
00:08:09,388 --> 00:08:11,457
THAT CHICKASAW CASINO WHAT TOOK
344
00:08:11,524 --> 00:08:12,058
MY MONIES!
>> YOU KNOW WHAT?
345
00:08:13,125 --> 00:08:13,893
HERE'S $200.
346
00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:15,628
YOU AND ME?
347
00:08:15,695 --> 00:08:16,462
WE'RE DONE.
348
00:08:16,529 --> 00:08:17,730
>> Early: WE DONE WHEN I SAY WE
349
00:08:17,830 --> 00:08:18,798
DONE!
350
00:08:18,865 --> 00:08:20,466
AND WE IS MANY, MANY PAYMENTS OF
351
00:08:20,533 --> 00:08:23,069
$500 AWAY FROM BEIN' DONE!
352
00:08:23,169 --> 00:08:23,870
YOU HEAR ME?!
>> Granny: AND COCAINE, TOO!
353
00:08:24,871 --> 00:08:25,805
BRING COCAINE!
354
00:08:25,872 --> 00:08:26,305
>> CUYLER, WE NEED YOU AT GATE
355
00:08:26,372 --> 00:08:28,007
TWO NOW.
356
00:08:28,074 --> 00:08:29,842
>> Rusty: ROGER THAT.
357
00:08:29,909 --> 00:08:31,744
>> Early: HE PAYS ME TO ACT LIKE
358
00:08:31,844 --> 00:08:32,712
ME!
AND I BEEN BEING ME ALL DAMN
359
00:08:33,713 --> 00:08:35,815
DAY!
360
00:08:35,882 --> 00:08:36,682
YOU OWE ME MONEY!
361
00:08:36,749 --> 00:08:38,584
>> Granny: AND DON'T FORGET THE
362
00:08:38,684 --> 00:08:39,385
BOOGER SUGAR.
363
00:08:39,485 --> 00:08:40,486
I'M CRASHIN' HARD HERE!
364
00:08:40,553 --> 00:08:41,654
>> Rusty: NOW Y'ALL LISTEN.
365
00:08:41,721 --> 00:08:43,055
THEY'RE ABOUT TO SHOOT THAT BIG
366
00:08:43,155 --> 00:08:44,490
MONSTER SCENE OUT BY THE RIVER.
367
00:08:44,557 --> 00:08:46,158
>> Early: IS THAT MY SHACK?
368
00:08:46,225 --> 00:08:47,827
THEY STOLE MY SHACK!
369
00:08:47,894 --> 00:08:48,861
>> Rusty: YEAH, THEY WANTED TO
370
00:08:48,928 --> 00:08:49,896
RENT OUR SHACK, BUT IT'S JUST
371
00:08:49,996 --> 00:08:50,730
CHEAPER TO BUILD ONE.
372
00:08:50,830 --> 00:08:51,831
>> Granny: HEY, SEE IF THEY'LL
373
00:08:51,898 --> 00:08:52,532
GIVE YOU THAT SHACK.
374
00:08:52,598 --> 00:08:53,533
THAT'S A BETTER SHACK.
375
00:08:53,599 --> 00:08:54,867
>> Rusty: NOW LISTEN, PLEASE
376
00:08:54,934 --> 00:08:56,002
DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME.
377
00:08:56,068 --> 00:08:56,936
I'M ACTUALLY GOOD AT THIS.
>> Early: DOING WHAT?
378
00:08:57,904 --> 00:08:59,605
>> Rusty: WELL, HANGIN' LIGHTS,
379
00:08:59,705 --> 00:09:00,439
MOSTLY.
380
00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:01,674
>> Early: HANGING LIGHTS, HUH?
381
00:09:01,741 --> 00:09:03,676
WELL, HEY, GRANNY, HOW MANY
382
00:09:03,743 --> 00:09:04,877
RUSTYS DOES IT TAKE TO HANG A
383
00:09:04,944 --> 00:09:06,913
LIGHT BULB?
384
00:09:07,013 --> 00:09:07,847
ONE. YOU!
385
00:09:07,914 --> 00:09:08,915
>> Rusty: Y'ALL ARE BOTH
386
00:09:09,015 --> 00:09:09,916
SUPER-HIGH RIGHT NOW.
387
00:09:10,016 --> 00:09:11,183
Y'ALL NEED TO GO GET YOU SOME
388
00:09:11,250 --> 00:09:12,018
SLEEP.
>> Early: ALL RIGHT, DAMN IT,
389
00:09:12,685 --> 00:09:14,387
I'LL CALM DOWN.
390
00:09:14,453 --> 00:09:15,922
BUT YOU TELL YOUR OLD BUDDY
391
00:09:16,022 --> 00:09:17,690
TANCE JACKERMAN THAT I'M GONNA
392
00:09:17,757 --> 00:09:18,858
BE HERE IN SPIRIT!
393
00:09:18,925 --> 00:09:20,927
[ INHALES DEEPLY ]
394
00:09:21,027 --> 00:09:21,694
MINERAL SPIRITS!
395
00:09:21,761 --> 00:09:23,062
>> Granny: ALSO, WOULD YOU
396
00:09:23,129 --> 00:09:23,930
PLEASE TELL HIM THAT --
397
00:09:24,030 --> 00:09:24,964
>> Rusty: I KNOW, GRANNY, YOU'RE
398
00:09:25,064 --> 00:09:25,698
INTERESTED IN COCAINE.
399
00:09:25,765 --> 00:09:27,133
>> Granny: THANK YOU.
400
00:09:27,233 --> 00:09:30,736
>> MONSTER CLIMAX, TAKE 1A.
401
00:09:30,803 --> 00:09:33,039
AND ACTION.
402
00:09:33,105 --> 00:09:35,207
>> Early: YOU WANT YOU A
403
00:09:35,274 --> 00:09:36,609
MONSTER, HUH?
404
00:09:36,709 --> 00:09:38,110
YOU MEET THE MONSTER!
405
00:09:38,210 --> 00:09:40,046
THE MONSTER IS YOU!
406
00:09:40,112 --> 00:09:41,080
>> WHAT'S GOING ON?
407
00:09:41,147 --> 00:09:42,548
I CAN'T SE-- AAH!
408
00:09:42,615 --> 00:09:43,816
>> Early: YOU DONE BROUGHT A
409
00:09:43,916 --> 00:09:45,985
KNIFE TO A MONSTER FIGHT.
410
00:09:46,085 --> 00:09:47,954
WHOA. AAH!
411
00:09:48,054 --> 00:09:50,890
AAH!
412
00:09:50,957 --> 00:09:51,991
>> Sheriff: AUDITIONS HAVE
413
00:09:52,091 --> 00:09:53,059
REALLY DRIED UP SINCE YOUR
414
00:09:53,125 --> 00:09:54,160
LITTLE STUNT DOWN AT THE RIVER,
415
00:09:54,260 --> 00:09:54,994
EARLY.
>> Early: WHAT'S REALLY DRIED
416
00:09:55,928 --> 00:09:56,896
UP?
417
00:09:56,963 --> 00:09:57,763
PEOPLE COMIN' AROUND AND PAYING
418
00:09:57,830 --> 00:09:58,831
ME TO ACT LIKE ME, TOO.
419
00:09:58,931 --> 00:10:00,099
THINGS IS TOUGH ALL OVER.
420
00:10:00,166 --> 00:10:00,967
>> Sheriff: YEAH, BUT YOU DIDN'T
421
00:10:01,067 --> 00:10:03,235
SPEND $4,000 ON HEAD SHOTS, DID
422
00:10:03,302 --> 00:10:04,070
YOU?
>> THEY TOOK YOUR PICTURE DOWN
423
00:10:04,804 --> 00:10:05,404
AT THE BARBECUE JOINT.
424
00:10:05,471 --> 00:10:07,006
>> Sheriff: DAMN IT!
425
00:10:07,106 --> 00:10:08,674
YOU TAKE THIS OVER THERE AND PUT
426
00:10:08,774 --> 00:10:09,909
IT UP RIGHT NEXT TO THE
427
00:10:09,976 --> 00:10:10,476
OAK RIDGE BOYS ON THAT
428
00:10:10,576 --> 00:10:11,811
WALL OF FAME!
429
00:10:11,911 --> 00:10:12,612
AND YOU CAN TELL 'EM I GOT
430
00:10:12,678 --> 00:10:14,747
10,000 MORE WHERE THAT CAME
431
00:10:14,814 --> 00:10:15,414
FROM!
>> IT JUST COME IN!
432
00:10:16,248 --> 00:10:17,116
STRAIGHT TO DVD!
433
00:10:17,183 --> 00:10:18,584
>> Sheriff: FINALLY!
434
00:10:18,651 --> 00:10:19,418
POP IT IN, BOYD!
435
00:10:19,485 --> 00:10:22,088
>> I BEEN FIXING TO LIVE ON THIS
436
00:10:22,154 --> 00:10:22,755
RIVER ALL MY COTTON-PICKING
437
00:10:22,822 --> 00:10:24,290
LIFE.
438
00:10:24,357 --> 00:10:25,524
[ INHALES DEEPLY ]
439
00:10:25,625 --> 00:10:28,127
IF YOURL STAND IN MY WAY, YOURL
440
00:10:28,194 --> 00:10:30,262
GONNA GET WHAT'S COMING TO
441
00:10:30,329 --> 00:10:31,097
YOURL.
>> Sheriff: HARD TO BELIEVE HE'S
442
00:10:31,998 --> 00:10:32,932
BRITISH.
443
00:10:32,999 --> 00:10:33,799
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT,
444
00:10:33,866 --> 00:10:35,101
FAST-FORWARD OVER TO MY SCENE.
445
00:10:35,167 --> 00:10:36,802
I GOT A SPEAKING PART, AND I
446
00:10:36,869 --> 00:10:37,937
WANT TO SEE THIS.
447
00:10:38,004 --> 00:10:39,105
>> HOLD FAST, GUYS.
448
00:10:39,171 --> 00:10:40,006
THIS CREATURE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT
449
00:10:40,106 --> 00:10:42,008
IT'S UP AGAINST.
450
00:10:42,108 --> 00:10:42,675
>> Sheriff: HOLY HELL!
451
00:10:42,775 --> 00:10:44,043
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!
452
00:10:44,143 --> 00:10:46,679
WAIT. ROLL THAT BACK.
453
00:10:46,779 --> 00:10:47,446
YEP!
THAT'S ME, RIGHT THERE!
454
00:10:48,014 --> 00:10:49,649
SEE THAT?!
455
00:10:49,715 --> 00:10:51,017
[ ROARS ]
64729
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