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1
00:00:05,751 --> 00:00:12,083
♪ MY DREAMS, THEY ARE ALL
DEAD AND BURIED ♪
2
00:00:12,167 --> 00:00:19,417
♪ SOMETIMES I WISH THE SUN
WOULD
JUST EXPLODE ♪
3
00:00:19,500 --> 00:00:26,250
♪ WHEN GOD COMES AND CALLS ME TO
HIS KINGDOM ♪
4
00:00:26,334 --> 00:00:28,626
♪ I'LL TAKE ALL YOU SONS OF
BITCHES WHEN I GO ♪
5
00:00:28,709 --> 00:00:29,584
Rusty: MY TURN.
6
00:00:29,667 --> 00:00:30,751
Early: HELL NO.
7
00:00:30,834 --> 00:00:31,751
Rusty: MAN, LET ME DRIVE THAT
THING!
8
00:00:31,834 --> 00:00:33,876
Early: DON'T TOUCH THE TRIM!
9
00:00:34,918 --> 00:00:36,167
[ AIR HORN BLOWS ]
[ GATE OPENS ]
10
00:00:36,250 --> 00:00:38,083
[ HOOVES CLOMPING ]
Sheriff: UNH-UNH! LOOK OUT!
11
00:00:38,167 --> 00:00:38,751
HERE I COME!
12
00:00:38,834 --> 00:00:39,792
GET OUT OF THE WAY!
13
00:00:39,876 --> 00:00:41,167
AAH!
14
00:00:41,250 --> 00:00:43,083
Early: LOOK AT THAT DAMN
DUMBASS A-TEARIN' AROUND!
15
00:00:43,167 --> 00:00:45,000
[ LAUGHS ]
[ BULL MOOS ]
16
00:00:45,083 --> 00:00:46,667
HE HOPPED IN THE DAMN BARREL!
17
00:00:46,751 --> 00:00:48,250
[ LAUGHS ]
WHOO!
18
00:00:48,334 --> 00:00:49,834
HE'S LIKE A DAMN PICKLE IN A
BARREL!
19
00:00:49,918 --> 00:00:51,292
HE'S A DAMN PICKLE!
20
00:00:51,375 --> 00:00:52,792
IN A PICKLE, THAT'S WHAT HE IS!
21
00:00:52,876 --> 00:00:53,834
AIN'T HE RUSTY, AIN'T HE?
22
00:00:53,918 --> 00:00:54,500
Rusty: YEAH, DADDY.
23
00:00:54,584 --> 00:00:55,667
HE'S A PICKLE.
24
00:00:55,751 --> 00:00:56,876
Early: WHAT THE FUCK YOU
MEAN BY THAT?
25
00:00:56,959 --> 00:00:58,375
Rusty: NOTHING.
26
00:00:58,459 --> 00:01:00,292
Early: I SAID HE'S LIKE A
DAMN PICKLE, NOT A DAMN PICKLE!
27
00:01:00,375 --> 00:01:01,542
HE'S A DAMN MAN!
28
00:01:01,626 --> 00:01:03,626
[ LAUGHS ]
LOOK AT THAT SUMBITCH BOUNCE
29
00:01:03,709 --> 00:01:05,125
AROUND!
30
00:01:05,209 --> 00:01:06,667
Rusty: WHY YOU THINK THEY
GIVIN' US A FREE RODEO, GRANNY?
31
00:01:06,751 --> 00:01:09,709
Granny: YOU KNOW WHAT THEY
SAY -- YOU DON'T GET SOMETHING
32
00:01:09,792 --> 00:01:10,834
FOR NOTHING.
33
00:01:10,918 --> 00:01:13,334
EXCEPT FOR RODEOS.
34
00:01:13,417 --> 00:01:15,792
YOU GET THEM FREE FOR NOTHING.
35
00:01:15,876 --> 00:01:17,167
THAT'S WHAT THEY SAY! YIPEE!
36
00:01:17,250 --> 00:01:18,584
Early: WAIT A MINUTE.
37
00:01:18,667 --> 00:01:20,626
AIN'T THAT THERE THE HAMBURGER
DOG?
38
00:01:20,709 --> 00:01:22,792
YOU KNOW THE BIG OL' DOG WHAT
HAMBURGERS COMES OUT OF?
39
00:01:22,876 --> 00:01:23,876
Rusty: THAT'S A BULL.
40
00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:25,459
[ GUN COCKS ]
[ BULL MOOS ]
41
00:01:25,542 --> 00:01:26,584
[ GUNSHOT ]
[ CROWD GASPS ]
42
00:01:26,667 --> 00:01:27,834
Early: MEAT!
43
00:01:27,918 --> 00:01:29,250
THAT'S FREE MEAT, RIGHT THERE!
44
00:01:29,334 --> 00:01:30,500
I SHOT IT, IT'S MINE!
45
00:01:30,584 --> 00:01:31,751
Sheriff: THANKS, EARLY!
46
00:01:31,834 --> 00:01:34,667
COULDN'T Y'ALL SEE I WAS IN
TROUBLE IN THERE!
47
00:01:34,751 --> 00:01:36,000
WHOA, DAMN, PLAYER!
48
00:01:36,083 --> 00:01:37,792
YOU CAPPED MY ONLY BULL!
49
00:01:37,876 --> 00:01:40,083
[ CHUCKLES ]
I SEE HOW Y'ALL PLAY IN
50
00:01:40,167 --> 00:01:41,542
DOUGAL COUNTY, DAMN.
51
00:01:41,626 --> 00:01:43,167
LET ME INTRODUCE MYSELF.
52
00:01:43,250 --> 00:01:46,876
MY NAME'S PAUL NEWBURG FROM
GALACTACON ENERGY SOLUTIONS,
BUT
53
00:01:46,959 --> 00:01:48,500
YOU CAN CALL ME P-NUT!
54
00:01:48,584 --> 00:01:49,709
WHAT, WHAT!
55
00:01:49,792 --> 00:01:52,751
CAN I GET A "WHAT, WHAT?"
All: WHAT, WHAT!
56
00:01:52,834 --> 00:01:55,959
GALACTACON HAS GOT AN
UNBELIEVABLY LUCRATIVE
57
00:01:56,042 --> 00:01:57,876
OPPORTUNITY FOR ALL Y'ALL!
58
00:01:57,959 --> 00:01:59,334
CHA-CHING, SON!
59
00:01:59,417 --> 00:02:00,876
MAKIN' THAT MONEY!
60
00:02:00,959 --> 00:02:03,542
BUT WE'LL DISCUSS IT AT
Y'ALL'S
CRIBS TOMORROW.
61
00:02:03,626 --> 00:02:07,334
RIGHT NOW, GET THEM HANDS UP
FOR SOME FREE CORN DOGS!
62
00:02:07,417 --> 00:02:09,876
COME ON, GET THEM CORN DOG
GUNS
OUT HERE!
63
00:02:09,959 --> 00:02:11,125
KEEP THAT BEAT GOI-I-IN!
64
00:02:11,209 --> 00:02:11,959
Granny: CORN DOGS!
65
00:02:12,042 --> 00:02:13,042
OVER HERE!
66
00:02:13,125 --> 00:02:14,000
[ GRUNTS ]
Early: LOOKY HERE, IT'S
RAININ' MEAT STICKS!
67
00:02:14,876 --> 00:02:15,751
Rusty: WHOO!
YEAH, BABY!
68
00:02:16,542 --> 00:02:17,792
Granny: YEAH!
69
00:02:17,876 --> 00:02:20,792
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
Dan Halen: WELL, WELL.
70
00:02:20,876 --> 00:02:24,542
IF IT ISN'T MR. SMOOTH-TALKING
RAP MAN, DROPPING SCIENCE FROM
71
00:02:24,626 --> 00:02:26,083
THE BIG CITY.
72
00:02:26,167 --> 00:02:28,083
YO, I'M JUST A SQUIRREL
TRYING TO FIND A NUT, PLAYER.
73
00:02:28,167 --> 00:02:30,042
Dan Halen: SAVE ME YOUR
SQUIRREL ANALOGIES!
74
00:02:30,125 --> 00:02:32,959
YOU CAN'T APPEAL TO THESE
RODENTS ON A PERSONAL LEVEL!
75
00:02:33,042 --> 00:02:35,584
THEY DON'T RESPOND TO HUMAN
CONNECTION AND EMPATHY.
76
00:02:35,667 --> 00:02:37,083
I'VE TRIED IT.
77
00:02:37,167 --> 00:02:39,292
EVERYONE! EYES UP HERE!
78
00:02:39,375 --> 00:02:44,375
YOU WILL ALL UPGRADE TO MY
ELITE
PREMIUM CABLE PACKAGE OR THIS
79
00:02:44,459 --> 00:02:45,459
BABY DIES!
80
00:02:45,542 --> 00:02:47,250
[ CROWD GASPS ]
YOU THINK I'M A MONSTER?
81
00:02:47,334 --> 00:02:49,918
I MEAN, OBVIOUSLY I WOULDN'T
DROP A REAL BABY.
82
00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:51,500
THE BABY WAS CHINESE.
83
00:02:51,584 --> 00:02:56,125
LOOK, I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE
OR WHY YOU'RE HERE --
84
00:02:56,209 --> 00:02:58,417
OH, IT SAYS IT RIGHT HERE.
85
00:02:58,500 --> 00:03:00,834
WAIT, YOU CAN GET NATURAL GAS
OUT OF THE GROUND?
86
00:03:00,918 --> 00:03:02,375
HOW?!
87
00:03:02,459 --> 00:03:03,459
WHAT'S UP, Y'ALL?
88
00:03:03,542 --> 00:03:04,959
IT'S YOUR BOY, P-NUT!
89
00:03:05,042 --> 00:03:06,083
BISCUI-I-I-ITS!
90
00:03:06,167 --> 00:03:07,918
Rusty: WE GOT US SOME FREE
BISCUITS!
91
00:03:08,000 --> 00:03:09,167
Granny: OH! REAL BISCUITS!
92
00:03:09,250 --> 00:03:10,667
Early: THE BISCUITS ARE
MINE!
93
00:03:10,751 --> 00:03:11,375
BISCUITS!
94
00:03:11,459 --> 00:03:14,751
MMM, SAVORY BISCUITS!
95
00:03:14,834 --> 00:03:15,959
YEAH, ALL RIGHT. EAT UP.
96
00:03:16,042 --> 00:03:17,292
Early: BREAKFAST IS OVER!
97
00:03:17,375 --> 00:03:20,083
NOW YOU 'BOUT TO GET YOUR HAT
BILL STRAIGHTENED UP.
98
00:03:20,167 --> 00:03:23,834
SO YOU PICK UP YOUR BISCUIT BOX
FROM THE CITY AND CLIMB YOUR ASS
99
00:03:23,918 --> 00:03:27,417
BACK INTO YOUR DAMN --
BEAUTIFUL SON OF A BITCH!
100
00:03:27,500 --> 00:03:28,834
IS THAT A BEHEMOTH?
101
00:03:28,918 --> 00:03:30,459
ON A 40-INCH LIFT KIT?
102
00:03:30,542 --> 00:03:32,125
YOU WANNA DRIVE IT?
103
00:03:32,209 --> 00:03:33,334
Early: YEAH! WHOO!
104
00:03:33,417 --> 00:03:33,918
YEAH!
105
00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:37,417
HELL YEAH! OH!
106
00:03:37,500 --> 00:03:39,209
Rusty: HEY.
107
00:03:39,292 --> 00:03:41,000
WHERE DO YOU GET ALL THAT MONEY
FOR BISCUITS AND CORN DOGS AND
108
00:03:41,083 --> 00:03:41,876
JEWELRY?
109
00:03:41,959 --> 00:03:43,083
ARE YOU ITALIAN?
110
00:03:43,167 --> 00:03:44,292
NO, SON.
111
00:03:44,375 --> 00:03:46,959
I'M JUST ROLLING WITH BIG
FACES
IN MY POCKET!
112
00:03:47,042 --> 00:03:48,083
WORKING FOR GALACTACON!
113
00:03:48,167 --> 00:03:49,959
Rusty: WHAT THE HELL'S
GALACTACON?
114
00:03:50,042 --> 00:03:53,250
WE'RE THE PEOPLE THAT'S GONNA
PULL ALL THIS NATURAL GAS OUT
115
00:03:53,334 --> 00:03:57,209
YOUR LAND AND GET YOU PAID WITH
SOME MAD STACKS OF MONEY, SON!
116
00:03:57,292 --> 00:03:59,792
DON'T YOU WANT SOME EXTENSIONS
FOR THAT HAIR OF YOURS?
117
00:03:59,876 --> 00:04:03,334
THAT WISPY ONE RIGHT THERE IN
THE MIDDLE THAT JUST WAVING BACK
118
00:04:03,417 --> 00:04:04,250
AND FORTH.
119
00:04:04,334 --> 00:04:06,167
Granny: OH, I DON'T KNOW.
120
00:04:06,250 --> 00:04:08,417
YOU THINK IT WOULD SUIT ME?
121
00:04:08,500 --> 00:04:10,876
DAMN, THIS IS A BIG-ASS
SPREAD, JACK.
122
00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:13,667
GALACTACON'S GIVIN OUT 10
BILLS
AN ACRE, Y'ALL.
123
00:04:13,751 --> 00:04:16,792
THAT'S MO MONEY, MO MONEY, MO
MONEY!
124
00:04:16,876 --> 00:04:18,000
DO THE MATH!
125
00:04:18,083 --> 00:04:20,417
Granny: LIL DOES A LITTLE TOO
MUCH MATH.
126
00:04:20,500 --> 00:04:21,667
LIL?
127
00:04:21,751 --> 00:04:23,000
Granny: YOU KNOW SHE EVEN
HAD A MATH LAB.
128
00:04:23,083 --> 00:04:25,584
IS THAT THE PRETTY LADY
UNDER THIS BIG-ASS WIG?
129
00:04:25,667 --> 00:04:27,626
Lil: YOU HERE TO DO SOME
DRILLIN'?
130
00:04:27,709 --> 00:04:31,667
[ LAUGHS ]
BABY, PLEASE, CALL ME P-NUT.
131
00:04:31,751 --> 00:04:35,042
[ CHUCKLES ]
GOOD SUCTION.
132
00:04:35,125 --> 00:04:36,626
THOSE AIN'T RIB BONES, BABY.
133
00:04:36,709 --> 00:04:37,584
GIVE ME THAT HAND BACK.
134
00:04:37,667 --> 00:04:38,751
Early: WHOO!
135
00:04:38,834 --> 00:04:42,500
[ SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY ]
[ CRASHING ]
136
00:04:42,584 --> 00:04:44,709
WHOA, WHOA! HOLD UP, PLAYER!
137
00:04:44,792 --> 00:04:46,334
AIN'T THAT YOUR WHIP?
138
00:04:46,417 --> 00:04:48,042
Early: DAMN STRAIGHT IT IS.
139
00:04:48,125 --> 00:04:49,542
WAIT.
140
00:04:49,626 --> 00:04:50,626
MY WHIP!
141
00:04:50,709 --> 00:04:51,876
HOW THE HELL DID THIS HAPPEN!
142
00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:52,959
THAT'S ALL RIGHT!
143
00:04:53,042 --> 00:04:54,500
THAT'S ALL RIGHT!
144
00:04:54,584 --> 00:04:57,542
YOU SIGN THIS CONTRACT, AND YOU
CAN BUY A WHOLE FLEET OF THESE.
145
00:04:57,626 --> 00:05:00,125
I'M GONNA GO TO TOWN AND GET
MY
GAME ON.
146
00:05:00,209 --> 00:05:00,918
Rusty: HEY WAIT, P-NUT.
147
00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:02,959
UH, CAN I GO WITH YOU?
148
00:05:03,042 --> 00:05:04,250
CAN YOU GO?
149
00:05:04,334 --> 00:05:06,584
PLAYER, CAN YOU DRIVE?
150
00:05:06,667 --> 00:05:09,626
[ SNIFFS ]
YO, RUZZY, IS YOUR AUNT WITH
151
00:05:09,709 --> 00:05:12,250
THAT CRAZY-ASS WIG SINGLE?
152
00:05:12,334 --> 00:05:14,250
Rusty: SINGLE BIGGEST WHORE
IN THIS COUNTY.
153
00:05:14,334 --> 00:05:16,167
SHE'LL FUCK ANYBODY FROM OUT
OF TOWN.
154
00:05:16,250 --> 00:05:19,125
DON'T YOU THINK I GOT TO GET
TO KNOW HER FIRST?
155
00:05:19,209 --> 00:05:20,584
Rusty: WHY?
156
00:05:20,667 --> 00:05:23,125
[ Laughing ] OH!
157
00:05:23,209 --> 00:05:25,125
THAT'S MY BOY! KNUCKLE UP!
158
00:05:25,209 --> 00:05:26,959
BLOW IT UP! BOOM!
159
00:05:27,042 --> 00:05:28,959
♪ ABOUT MY BUSINESS
♪ EVERY DAY
160
00:05:29,042 --> 00:05:31,167
♪ YOU KNOW I BE ABOUT MY
BUSINESS ♪
161
00:05:31,250 --> 00:05:33,417
♪ EVERY WAY
♪ YOU KNOW I'M HANDLING MY
162
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:36,125
BUSINESS ALL THE TIME ♪
♪ YOU KNOW I BE ABOUT MY
163
00:05:36,209 --> 00:05:38,918
BUSINESS ♪
♪ AND WHUPPIN' YOUR BEHIND
164
00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:42,083
♪ I GET A HEALTHY PER DIEM WHEN
MY SUPERVISORS SEE I'M EXCEEDING
165
00:05:42,167 --> 00:05:45,834
QUOTAS LIKE EVERY DAMN DAY ♪
♪ AND WITH YOUR CONTRACT SIGNED,
166
00:05:45,918 --> 00:05:48,959
THEN YOUR WHOLE TOWN IS MINE ♪
ACTUALLY, IT'S LEGAL PROPERTY
167
00:05:49,042 --> 00:05:50,083
OF GALACTACON ENERGY SOLUTIONS.
168
00:05:50,167 --> 00:05:51,751
TAKE WHAT YOU WANT, EARLY.
169
00:05:51,834 --> 00:05:53,334
I DON'T NEED THIS PISSANT
MONEY.
170
00:05:53,417 --> 00:05:55,876
CAUSE WHEN THEM FRACKING TRUCKS
COME, I AM RETIRING.
171
00:05:55,959 --> 00:05:58,876
Early: HELL, I DON'T WANT
YOUR DAMN POCKET CHANGE, CAUSE
172
00:05:58,959 --> 00:06:01,125
WHEN THEY FRACK MY LAND, I'LL
BE
RICHER THAN YOU.
173
00:06:01,209 --> 00:06:03,959
AND I MIGHT JUST BUY YOUR DAMN
HOUSE AND MOVE YOUR LAZY ASS
174
00:06:04,042 --> 00:06:05,167
RIGHT THE HELL OUT!
175
00:06:05,250 --> 00:06:08,334
Sheriff: SO, UH, NO ROBBERY
TODAY, OR...
176
00:06:08,417 --> 00:06:09,751
EH, IT'S UP TO HIM.
177
00:06:09,834 --> 00:06:10,959
I COULDN'T CARE LESS.
178
00:06:11,042 --> 00:06:12,334
THAT'S NO SKIN OFF MY WALLET.
179
00:06:12,417 --> 00:06:13,792
Early: [ Chuckling ] YOU'RE
MAKING ME LAUGH HERE!
180
00:06:13,876 --> 00:06:15,584
I WOULDN'T WIPE MY TAIL WITH
THIS MESS.
181
00:06:15,667 --> 00:06:17,250
I'M GONNA BE RICH, YOU HEAR?
182
00:06:17,334 --> 00:06:18,626
I JUST WEAR THIS BAG OUT OF
HABIT.
183
00:06:18,709 --> 00:06:19,542
OH, YEAH?
184
00:06:19,626 --> 00:06:20,584
I'M GONNA BE RICHER THAN YOU.
185
00:06:20,667 --> 00:06:21,626
HOW'S THAT SIT WITH YA?
186
00:06:21,709 --> 00:06:23,167
Early: THE HELL YOU ARE!
187
00:06:23,250 --> 00:06:25,334
HELL, I MIGHT JUST BUY YOUR DAMN
NEW MONEY WITH MY NEW MONEY AND
188
00:06:25,417 --> 00:06:27,042
BUY YOUR MONEY OUT AND THROW
IT
AWAY!
189
00:06:27,125 --> 00:06:31,334
Sheriff: HOW ARE Y'ALL
GETTING RICH ALL A SUDDEN?
190
00:06:31,417 --> 00:06:34,375
I BET YOU THERE'S GAS ALL UP
UNDER HERE.
191
00:06:34,459 --> 00:06:38,125
IF YOU NEED TO LEVEL THE HOUSE,
JUST GIVE ME TIME TO GET MAMA'S
192
00:06:38,209 --> 00:06:39,334
IRON LUNG OUT OF THE CRAWL
SPACE.
193
00:06:39,417 --> 00:06:40,334
YO, RUZZY.
194
00:06:40,417 --> 00:06:42,375
WHAT'S THAT GEO SURVEY SAY,
PLAYER?
195
00:06:42,459 --> 00:06:44,292
Rusty: IT AIN'T GOT NO
SHALE.
196
00:06:44,375 --> 00:06:46,209
JUST GRANITE BEDROCK UP IN THIS
BITCH.
197
00:06:46,292 --> 00:06:47,125
Sheriff: WHAT'S THAT MEAN?
198
00:06:47,209 --> 00:06:48,542
THAT'S GOOD, RIGHT?
199
00:06:48,626 --> 00:06:50,167
SORRY, LAW DOG.
200
00:06:50,250 --> 00:06:52,334
I KNOW YOU WANT THIS, BUT NOT
EVERYBODY CAN RIDE THE GRAVY
201
00:06:52,417 --> 00:06:52,959
TRAIN.
202
00:06:53,042 --> 00:06:54,834
WE GOTS TO BOUNCE.
203
00:06:54,918 --> 00:06:56,292
Sheriff: WELL.
204
00:06:56,375 --> 00:06:59,209
I-I WASN'T GONNA SAY NOTHING,
BUT WHAT YOU'RE DOING HERE IS
205
00:06:59,292 --> 00:07:02,417
JUST BAD FOR THE ENVIRONMENT,
AND SOMEBODY OUGHT TO TELL
206
00:07:02,500 --> 00:07:04,542
SOMEBODY ABOUT THIS AND TELL
THEM WHAT YOU'RE DOING.
207
00:07:04,626 --> 00:07:08,000
I MEAN, WHAT ABOUT OUR
GRANDKIDS
AND THEIR GRANDKIDS?
208
00:07:08,083 --> 00:07:09,459
Rusty: SHERIFF, YOU AIN'T
GOT NO KIDS.
209
00:07:09,542 --> 00:07:11,626
Sheriff: CAUSE I'VE GOT
SLUGGISH SPERM!
210
00:07:11,709 --> 00:07:13,667
AND NOW THE WHOLE WORLD KNOWS.
211
00:07:13,751 --> 00:07:16,000
THANK YOU SO MUCH, RUSTY.
212
00:07:16,083 --> 00:07:17,709
HAVE A GOOD DAY, RAISIN SACK.
213
00:07:17,792 --> 00:07:18,334
WE OUT.
214
00:07:18,417 --> 00:07:20,792
PEACE!
215
00:07:20,876 --> 00:07:22,709
Sheriff: I'M GLAD IT AIN'T
ON MY LAND.
216
00:07:22,792 --> 00:07:25,000
BECAUSE THESE FRACKING
OUTFITS,
THEY'RE JUST BAD FOR
217
00:07:25,083 --> 00:07:26,375
MOTHER EARTH.
218
00:07:26,459 --> 00:07:29,500
Early: WELL, MY SNAPBACK HERE
TENDS TO DISAGREE.
219
00:07:29,584 --> 00:07:32,751
Sheriff: WELL, YOUR HAT DOES
MAKE A COMPELLING ARGUMENT,
220
00:07:32,834 --> 00:07:34,250
EARLY.
221
00:07:34,334 --> 00:07:37,083
I'M JUST SAYING, YOU GOT TO
WEIGH THE PROS AND CONS HERE.
222
00:07:37,167 --> 00:07:42,083
Early: GOOD -- FREE MONEY,
FREE TRUCKS, FREE SUPERTRUCK TO
223
00:07:42,167 --> 00:07:42,959
CRUSH MY FREE TRUCKS WITH.
Granny: FREE NEW HAIR.
224
00:07:43,751 --> 00:07:44,959
PUT THAT IN THERE.
225
00:07:45,042 --> 00:07:46,125
Early: I'M GONNA SHOVE YOU
IN THAT FRACK HOLE!
226
00:07:46,209 --> 00:07:47,542
Granny: [ GRUNTS ]
Early: FRACK YOU UP!
227
00:07:47,626 --> 00:07:50,417
Sheriff: EARLY, THEY PUT
TOXIC CHEMICALS IN THOSE HOLES.
228
00:07:50,500 --> 00:07:52,500
HELL, IT'LL SET YOUR WELL
WATER
ON FIRE.
229
00:07:52,584 --> 00:07:53,959
Early: SON OF A BITCH!
230
00:07:54,042 --> 00:07:55,250
ARE YOU SERIOUS?
231
00:07:55,334 --> 00:07:57,292
Sheriff: YOU'D BETTER BELIEVE
I AM.
232
00:07:57,375 --> 00:07:58,959
Early: FREE FIRE WATER! YEAH!
233
00:07:59,042 --> 00:08:01,042
Sheriff: NO, THAT GOES IN THE
BAD COLUMN, EARLY.
234
00:08:01,125 --> 00:08:02,876
Early: I WILL FRY THEM
CATFISH SUMBITCHES WHERE THEY
235
00:08:02,959 --> 00:08:04,459
LIVE!
236
00:08:04,542 --> 00:08:05,792
Sheriff: EARLY, I'M TALKING
ABOUT YOUR DRINKING WATER!
237
00:08:05,876 --> 00:08:08,167
SEE, WHEN THEY GO DOWN IN THE
GROUND FOR THAT GAS --
238
00:08:08,250 --> 00:08:09,209
Early: GAS?
239
00:08:09,292 --> 00:08:10,584
YOU MEAN INSIDE THE WORLD?
240
00:08:10,667 --> 00:08:13,542
Sheriff: [ SIGHS ]
YEAH, EARLY, THAT'S WHAT THIS IS
241
00:08:13,626 --> 00:08:14,709
ALL ABOUT.
242
00:08:14,792 --> 00:08:15,709
Early: FREE HUFF GAS ON MY
LAND, TOO!
243
00:08:15,792 --> 00:08:16,751
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!
244
00:08:16,834 --> 00:08:18,709
THAT'S A BIG GOOD, BIG TIME,
YEAH!
245
00:08:18,792 --> 00:08:21,000
Granny: P-NUT'S A GOOD
ITALIAN BOY.
246
00:08:21,083 --> 00:08:23,751
I AIN'T HAVE NOBODY SAY
NOTHING
BAD ABOUT THE WOPS.
247
00:08:23,834 --> 00:08:26,709
Sheriff: GRANNY, HE GETS
YOUR SIGNATURE AND HE'S GONNA
248
00:08:26,792 --> 00:08:29,626
LEAVE YOU WITH A BIG OL'
STEAMING HOLE IN THE GROUND
AND
249
00:08:29,709 --> 00:08:35,542
JUST A FEW MILLION MEASLY
DOLLARS FOR YOUR...TROUBLE.
250
00:08:35,626 --> 00:08:41,709
I-I'M STILL GLAD THERE AIN'T
NO
GAS ON MY LAND, THOUGH.
251
00:08:41,792 --> 00:08:42,959
Rusty: P-NUT?
252
00:08:43,042 --> 00:08:44,042
Lil: MM.
253
00:08:44,125 --> 00:08:45,709
GUESS IT'S YOUR TURN TO GET
SCREWED.
254
00:08:45,792 --> 00:08:47,083
I'M GONNA HOLLA AT YOU, BABY!
255
00:08:47,167 --> 00:08:49,167
Lil: YEAH, WHATEVER.
256
00:08:49,250 --> 00:08:50,751
Rusty: YO P-NUT! WAS UP, G?
257
00:08:50,834 --> 00:08:52,500
WHAT YOU GOT THAT BIG BAG FOR?
258
00:08:52,584 --> 00:08:54,250
I GOT TO GET ON, PLAYER!
259
00:08:54,334 --> 00:08:55,584
MY CELLY'S BLOWING UP!
260
00:08:55,667 --> 00:08:58,042
I GOT TO TAP-TAP-TAP THAT GAS
IN
SOUTH DAKOTA, SON!
261
00:08:58,125 --> 00:08:59,459
Rusty: ALL RIGHT!
262
00:08:59,542 --> 00:09:02,250
GOT TO DROP BY MY CRIB, GET MY
NEW KICKS, AND THEN WE OUT!
263
00:09:02,334 --> 00:09:03,334
WHOA, WHOA, RUZZY!
264
00:09:03,417 --> 00:09:04,667
I GOTS TO FLY SOLO.
265
00:09:04,751 --> 00:09:06,292
IT AIN'T NO TEAM SPORT.
266
00:09:06,375 --> 00:09:10,125
BUT, MAN, I COULDN'T HAVE DONE
IT WITHOUT YOU.
267
00:09:10,209 --> 00:09:11,834
COME ON -- I GOT A GRENADE
RIGHT
HERE.
268
00:09:11,918 --> 00:09:12,959
YOU GOT TO PULL THE PIN!
269
00:09:13,042 --> 00:09:13,834
BLOW IT UP!
270
00:09:13,918 --> 00:09:15,209
Rusty: DAMN IT. I KNEW IT!
271
00:09:15,292 --> 00:09:16,500
YOU WASN'T REALLY MY BUD!
272
00:09:16,584 --> 00:09:18,334
YOU WAS JUST USING ME TO GET
THE
GAS!
273
00:09:18,417 --> 00:09:20,042
HAVE A GOOD LIFE, PAUL NEWBURG!
274
00:09:20,125 --> 00:09:21,959
RUZZY, YOUR SNAPBACK!
275
00:09:22,042 --> 00:09:22,959
LITTLE BROTHER!
276
00:09:23,042 --> 00:09:25,042
RUZZY!
277
00:09:25,125 --> 00:09:26,709
Rusty: THEY AIN'T GONNA GET
NONE OF OUR GAS!
278
00:09:26,792 --> 00:09:27,792
NOT IF I CAN HELP IT!
279
00:09:27,876 --> 00:09:29,626
Early: ARE YOU OUT YOUR DAMN
MIND?!
280
00:09:29,709 --> 00:09:32,167
WE ABOUT TO BE STUFFED UP THE
BUTT WITH GREEN LEAFY SPENDING
281
00:09:32,250 --> 00:09:33,000
MONEY.
282
00:09:33,083 --> 00:09:34,209
WE GONNA BE RICHER THAN HELL!
283
00:09:34,292 --> 00:09:36,500
Granny: RUSTY, THEY'LL
REPOSSESS MY HAIR!
284
00:09:36,584 --> 00:09:38,375
WE DON'T WANT THAT, DO WE?
285
00:09:38,459 --> 00:09:40,500
I ONLY GOT THREE MORE PAYMENTS
ON THIS!
286
00:09:40,584 --> 00:09:43,000
[ HORN HONKS ]
Rusty: AIN'T NONE A Y'ALL
287
00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:44,334
GONNA BE FRACKING THIS LAND!
288
00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:46,083
NOT WHILE I LIVE AND BREATHE!
289
00:09:46,167 --> 00:09:48,292
'CAUSE I AIN'T GONNA -- WAIT,
WHERE ARE THEY GOING?
290
00:09:48,375 --> 00:09:50,709
Granny: PROBABLY SHOULD HAVE
CHAINED YOURSELF TO THE FIELD
291
00:09:50,792 --> 00:09:52,125
OVER THERE, NITWIT.
292
00:09:52,209 --> 00:09:54,500
Early: THEY DON'T DRILL
TREES, YOU DUMB CHUGNUT.
293
00:09:54,584 --> 00:09:56,000
[ LAUGHS ]
WE STILL GONNA BE RICH.
294
00:09:56,083 --> 00:09:56,751
Rusty: OH CRAP!
295
00:09:56,834 --> 00:09:57,834
DADDY!
296
00:09:57,918 --> 00:09:58,792
DADDY, YOU GOT A KEY FOR THIS
THING?
297
00:09:58,876 --> 00:10:00,042
LET ME OUT!
298
00:10:00,125 --> 00:10:01,876
HOLD UP, GUYS!
299
00:10:01,959 --> 00:10:03,375
STOP THE DRILLING, Y'ALL!
300
00:10:03,459 --> 00:10:04,542
STOP IT!
301
00:10:04,626 --> 00:10:07,292
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING
HERE, NEWBURG?
302
00:10:07,375 --> 00:10:09,709
Y'ALL CAN'T BE DRILLING
HERE WITHOUT NO LAND RIGHTS,
303
00:10:09,792 --> 00:10:10,751
SON!
304
00:10:10,834 --> 00:10:12,334
BUT YOU ALREADY SECURED
THOSE.
305
00:10:12,417 --> 00:10:13,083
RIGHT?
WHOOPS. BA-BOOM!
306
00:10:14,125 --> 00:10:14,959
Early: WHAT, WHAT?
Granny: WHAT, WHAT?
307
00:10:15,959 --> 00:10:17,417
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?
308
00:10:17,500 --> 00:10:20,209
I CAN'T BE LETTING NO ONE
FRACK MY BACKYARD, PLAYBOY.
309
00:10:20,292 --> 00:10:21,834
THIS IS MY HOME TURF, SON!
310
00:10:21,918 --> 00:10:23,125
Rusty: DAMN STRAIGHT, P-NUT!
311
00:10:23,209 --> 00:10:25,709
BA-BOOM! WHOO! YEAH!
312
00:10:25,792 --> 00:10:29,250
NICE WORKING WITH YOU, YOU
DUMB SON OF A BITCH!
313
00:10:29,334 --> 00:10:32,042
HELL, IT'S JUST A JOB.
314
00:10:32,125 --> 00:10:33,375
MY ONLY JOB.
315
00:10:33,459 --> 00:10:34,459
UGH.
316
00:10:34,542 --> 00:10:36,542
I'M PROBABLY GONNA LOSE MY
DAMN JOB.
317
00:10:36,626 --> 00:10:38,584
Granny: LOOK OUT FOR THE
RENT-A-HAIR TRUCK.
318
00:10:38,667 --> 00:10:40,500
THEY USUALLY COME AT NIGHT.
319
00:10:40,584 --> 00:10:43,042
THEY'RE ROUGH AS BASTARDS AND
THEY MOVE LIKE CATS.
320
00:10:43,125 --> 00:10:44,626
Rusty: WHY'D YOU DO IT,
P-NUT?
321
00:10:44,709 --> 00:10:46,876
I DIDN'T WANT YOU THINKING I
WAS USING YOU, RUZZY.
322
00:10:46,959 --> 00:10:48,459
Early: WE KNOWED YOU WAS
USIN' US!
323
00:10:48,542 --> 00:10:50,792
AND WE WAS OKAY WITH IT 'CAUSE
WE WAS GONNA GET A BIG-ASS
324
00:10:50,876 --> 00:10:52,459
PAYDAY OUT OF IT!
325
00:10:52,542 --> 00:10:54,834
Lil: AND I WAS GONNA MILK
YOUR FAT ASS FOR CHILD SUPPORT.
326
00:10:54,918 --> 00:10:56,292
CHILD SUPPORT?
327
00:10:56,375 --> 00:10:59,417
Y-YOU SAYING --
Lil: YEAH! THAT'S RIGHT!
328
00:10:59,500 --> 00:11:01,626
I POKED A HOLE IN YOUR RUBBERS.
329
00:11:01,709 --> 00:11:03,125
Granny: OH, YOU DID, TOO?
330
00:11:03,209 --> 00:11:04,334
Early: I DONE IT TOO!
331
00:11:04,417 --> 00:11:05,834
GUILTY.
332
00:11:05,918 --> 00:11:07,626
Rusty: AN I SCRAPED SEMEN
OFF YOUR HOTEL SHEETS AND PUT IT
333
00:11:07,709 --> 00:11:09,667
IN AUNT LIL'S BABY BUCKET WITH
A FINGER --
334
00:11:09,751 --> 00:11:10,417
Lil: WHOA-HO-HO! HEY!
335
00:11:10,500 --> 00:11:11,834
SHH! THAT'S BETWEEN US!
336
00:11:11,918 --> 00:11:14,209
Early: WELCOME TO THE FAMILY,
P-NUT!
337
00:11:14,292 --> 00:11:15,000
WE HAPPY TO HAVE YOU.
338
00:11:15,083 --> 00:11:16,876
OH, DAMN IT.
339
00:11:24,167 --> 00:11:26,417
FOR RICHER OR POORER?
340
00:11:26,500 --> 00:11:29,792
MOST LIKELY POORER SINCE YOU
DECIDED TO RIP UP THE
341
00:11:29,876 --> 00:11:32,626
GAS-DRILLING RIGHTS FOR
EVERYONE
IN THIS TOWN!
342
00:11:32,709 --> 00:11:34,250
I TAKE HER, OKAY, REVEREND?
343
00:11:34,334 --> 00:11:35,125
I DO!
344
00:11:35,209 --> 00:11:36,459
GET ON WITH THIS DAMN THING.
345
00:11:36,542 --> 00:11:38,000
SUPER.
346
00:11:38,083 --> 00:11:42,792
I BEGRUDGINGLY PRONOUNCE YOU
MR. AND MRS. PAUL "P-NUT"
347
00:11:42,876 --> 00:11:44,000
NEWBURG.
348
00:11:44,083 --> 00:11:46,250
EH, YOU MAY KISS THE BRIDE.
349
00:11:46,334 --> 00:11:47,751
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT!
350
00:11:47,834 --> 00:11:49,125
WHO THREW THE EGG?
351
00:11:49,209 --> 00:11:50,000
OH, I'M SORRY.
352
00:11:50,083 --> 00:11:51,334
AIN'T THAT THE TRADITION?
353
00:11:51,417 --> 00:11:53,125
IT'S RICE, PLAYER! RICE!
354
00:11:53,209 --> 00:11:54,542
MAYBE IT OUGHT TO BE A BRICK!
355
00:11:54,626 --> 00:11:55,751
HEY! HEY!
356
00:11:55,834 --> 00:11:57,500
LET'S THROW THESE BIG RED
BOOKS AT HIM!
357
00:11:57,584 --> 00:11:59,626
[ GRUNTS ]
OW! WAIT, Y'ALL!
358
00:11:59,709 --> 00:12:01,209
PLEASE! PLEASE!
359
00:12:01,292 --> 00:12:03,876
DON'T LASH OUT AGAINST YOUR
BROTHER WITH PHYSICAL VIOLENCE!
360
00:12:03,959 --> 00:12:04,751
THAT'S RIGHT!
361
00:12:04,834 --> 00:12:06,459
LISTEN TO HIM.
362
00:12:06,542 --> 00:12:10,334
RATHER, LET US PRAY THAT
JESUS WILL SMITE HIM BY WAY OF
363
00:12:10,417 --> 00:12:13,125
THE BALL CANCER OR
FLESH-EATING
VIRUS.
364
00:12:13,209 --> 00:12:16,292
FATHER LORD JESUS, PLEASE MAKE
THIS SON OF A BITCH SUFFER.
365
00:12:16,375 --> 00:12:18,792
WE GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE
WHILE THEIR EYES ARE CLOSED.
366
00:12:18,876 --> 00:12:20,959
Early: OPEN UP, YOU BEARDED
OLD BILLY GOAT!
367
00:12:21,042 --> 00:12:23,000
COME ON! IT'S PAYDAY!
368
00:12:23,083 --> 00:12:25,209
[ BELL JINGLES ]
THERE YOU GO. HAVE AT IT.
369
00:12:25,292 --> 00:12:27,167
[ CASH REGISTER DINGS ]
Early: WHAT THE...
370
00:12:27,250 --> 00:12:28,292
AIN'T NOTHING IN HERE!
371
00:12:28,375 --> 00:12:30,000
I KNOW, YOU DAMNED SON OF A
BITCH.
372
00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:33,000
I BURNED IT ALL IN A RIDICULOUS
DISPLAY OF HOW RICH I THOUGHT I
373
00:12:33,083 --> 00:12:35,500
WAS GONNA BE WHEN THAT
FRACKING
CASH ROLLED IN.
374
00:12:35,584 --> 00:12:36,417
Early: COME ON, BOYD!
DAMN!
375
00:12:37,250 --> 00:12:38,667
I GOT MY MOUTH TO FEED!
376
00:12:38,751 --> 00:12:41,834
YOU AIN'T WELCOME TO ROB MY
STORE NO MORE UNTIL YOU GET THAT
377
00:12:41,918 --> 00:12:44,334
NEW BROTHER-IN-LAW OF YOUIN
BACK
ON THE PROGRAM!
378
00:12:44,417 --> 00:12:47,918
GET US SOME OF THAT DAMN
FRACKING MONEY!
379
00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:50,834
I KNOW THEY'RE MAD AT ME NOW,
BUT IN THE LONG RUN THEY'RE
380
00:12:50,918 --> 00:12:52,334
GONNA THANK ME.
381
00:12:52,417 --> 00:12:55,167
I MEAN, IF IT WEREN'T FOR ME,
ALL THESE FISH WOULD BE DEAD.
382
00:12:55,250 --> 00:12:56,626
Lil: YEAH, YEAH.
383
00:12:56,709 --> 00:12:58,626
NATURE'S THE TITS AND ALL, BUT
AIN'T YOU GOT A CONDO IN THE
384
00:12:58,709 --> 00:13:00,209
CITY?
385
00:13:00,292 --> 00:13:02,083
I MEAN, YOU SAID YOU HAD A
POOL
AND AN INDOOR CRAPPER.
386
00:13:02,167 --> 00:13:03,459
COME ON! LET'S LIVE THERE.
387
00:13:03,542 --> 00:13:04,375
NO, BABY.
388
00:13:04,459 --> 00:13:06,000
WE CAN'T RAISE OUR...
389
00:13:06,083 --> 00:13:08,042
[ CHUCKLES ]
...WHATEVER THE HELL IS IN
YOUR
390
00:13:08,125 --> 00:13:09,584
BELLY IN THE CITY.
391
00:13:09,667 --> 00:13:13,584
THAT GODFORSAKEN MONSTER NEEDS
TO RUN AND PLAY OUT HERE IN THE
392
00:13:13,667 --> 00:13:14,542
SUNSHINE.
393
00:13:14,626 --> 00:13:16,042
Lil: I AIN'T WORKIN' NO MORE.
394
00:13:16,125 --> 00:13:16,542
I GAVE NOTICE.
OH.
395
00:13:17,375 --> 00:13:18,792
Y-YOU HAD A CAREER, HUH?
396
00:13:18,876 --> 00:13:20,125
Lil: YEAH!
397
00:13:20,209 --> 00:13:22,334
I JERKED DUDES OFF FOR MONEY
BEHIND THE BOW MART.
398
00:13:22,417 --> 00:13:25,375
I TOLD YOU THAT.
399
00:13:25,459 --> 00:13:28,876
[ GURGLING ]
[ LAUGHS ]
400
00:13:28,959 --> 00:13:31,584
YOU KNOW, I-I-I FEEL LIKE WE
MIGHT HAVE RUSHED INTO THIS A
401
00:13:31,667 --> 00:13:32,626
LITTLE BIT, YOU KNOW?
402
00:13:32,709 --> 00:13:35,125
Lil: SECOND TRIMESTER, BABY!
403
00:13:35,209 --> 00:13:37,042
CAN'T TOUCH IT NOW!
404
00:13:37,125 --> 00:13:38,500
HA, HA!
405
00:13:38,584 --> 00:13:40,584
I BEEN GESTATING THE HELL OUT
OF THIS MOTHER FUCKER
406
00:13:40,667 --> 00:13:41,709
WHOO!
407
00:13:41,792 --> 00:13:43,626
[ LAUGHS ]
DO THE RIGHT THING P-NUT.
408
00:13:43,709 --> 00:13:45,000
YOU MADE YOUR BED.
409
00:13:45,083 --> 00:13:46,876
YOU AIN'T GOT TO WORRY 'BOUT
MONEY.
410
00:13:46,959 --> 00:13:50,334
I GOT A WAD OF CASH SAVED UP
AND A SOLID BUSINESS PLAN.
411
00:13:50,417 --> 00:13:52,292
WHAT, WHAT!
412
00:13:52,375 --> 00:13:54,250
Lil: WHAT IS IT?
413
00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:55,751
YOU HEARD OF FRO-YO, RIGHT?
414
00:13:55,834 --> 00:13:57,125
WELL THIS IS HO-YO!
415
00:13:57,209 --> 00:13:59,417
HOT YOGURT! WHAT, WHAT!
416
00:13:59,500 --> 00:14:03,250
EVERYBODY BE DOING FRO-YO, BUT
P-NUT ZIGS WHERE THE FOOLS BE
417
00:14:03,334 --> 00:14:04,751
ZAGGING.
418
00:14:04,834 --> 00:14:07,709
PLUS, I SAVE ON REFRIGERATION
CAUSE THERE AIN'T NO POWER UP
419
00:14:07,792 --> 00:14:08,918
IN THIS BITCH.
420
00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:09,751
Rusty: WHAT, WHAT!
GET SOME OF THIS SON!
421
00:14:10,584 --> 00:14:11,375
TOSS IT UP!
422
00:14:11,459 --> 00:14:12,667
Rusty: MMM!
423
00:14:12,751 --> 00:14:14,709
[ COUGHS ]
[ SNIFFLES ]
424
00:14:14,792 --> 00:14:16,542
IT'S GOOD. YEAH.
425
00:14:16,626 --> 00:14:19,292
THAT'S SOME SCRIMP COCKTAIL
FLAVOR RIGHT THERE.
426
00:14:19,375 --> 00:14:21,334
YOU WANT SOME CLAMS CASINO OR
LOBSTER BISQUESES?
427
00:14:21,417 --> 00:14:22,751
Rusty: NO, THAT'S PLENTY.
428
00:14:22,834 --> 00:14:25,709
Lil: HOT...SEAFOOD-FLAVORED
YOGURT?
429
00:14:25,792 --> 00:14:26,792
YEAH, YEAH!
430
00:14:26,876 --> 00:14:28,417
THIS IS THE FUTURE, BOO!
431
00:14:28,500 --> 00:14:30,417
SEAFOOD HO-YO IN THE HOUSE!
432
00:14:30,500 --> 00:14:32,292
DOUGAL COUNTY, WHAT, WHAT?
433
00:14:32,375 --> 00:14:34,751
[ Crying ] MY HO-YO STAND!
434
00:14:34,834 --> 00:14:36,459
Granny: LORDY, LORDY.
435
00:14:36,542 --> 00:14:41,626
I GUESS THAT HO-YO GOT TOO HOT
FOR SOME FOLKS ROUND HERE.
436
00:14:41,709 --> 00:14:44,000
Early: LOOKS LIKE SOMEBODY'S
TRYIN' TO SEND YOU A MESSAGE,
437
00:14:44,083 --> 00:14:44,792
LITTLE FELLER.
438
00:14:44,876 --> 00:14:46,209
WHAT DOES THAT SAY?
439
00:14:46,292 --> 00:14:48,334
Early: IT'S SUPPOSED TO
SAY "YOU NEED TO GO BACK TO"
440
00:14:48,417 --> 00:14:50,918
THERE TO FRACKING OUR LAND!"
TOWN PEOPLE -- THEY DON'T
SPELL
441
00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:53,375
TOO GOOD WHEN THEY RED-HOT AND
PISSIFIED OFF AT YOU!
442
00:14:53,459 --> 00:14:55,167
I AIN'T GOING BACK TO
FRACKING.
443
00:14:55,250 --> 00:14:56,792
I WON'T DO IT! IT'S WRONG!
444
00:14:56,876 --> 00:14:58,042
Early: FINE!
445
00:14:58,125 --> 00:14:59,542
I'LL GET THE DAMN GAS OUT THE
GROUND.
446
00:14:59,626 --> 00:15:01,083
YOU JUST SEE.
447
00:15:01,167 --> 00:15:02,459
DAMN DINOSAURS.
448
00:15:02,542 --> 00:15:05,125
A-BURYIN' THEIR KIN SO DAMN
DEEP.
449
00:15:05,209 --> 00:15:07,125
Granny: WAIT, WHAT'S THAT
THERE?
450
00:15:07,209 --> 00:15:07,751
OH, IT'S BUBBLING!
IT'S COMING UP!
451
00:15:08,542 --> 00:15:09,292
Early: HELL YEAH!
IT'S BUBBLIN'! COME ON!
452
00:15:10,334 --> 00:15:11,250
Granny: KEEP DIGGIN'!
453
00:15:11,334 --> 00:15:13,459
WE'RE RICH, BITCHES!
454
00:15:13,542 --> 00:15:15,834
WE'S RICH NOW.
455
00:15:15,918 --> 00:15:17,292
Early: NO HARD FEELINGS,
P-NUT.
456
00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:18,792
YOU KNOW, YOU'RE FAMILY NOW.
457
00:15:18,876 --> 00:15:22,292
SO IMMA SHOW YOU WHAT KIND OF
FELLER I AM.
458
00:15:22,375 --> 00:15:25,626
YOU GETTIN' LESS THAN THE REST
OF US CAUSE, UH, YOU DOUBTED
ME.
459
00:15:25,709 --> 00:15:28,500
[ SNIFFS, GROANS ]
THIS DON'T SMELL LIKE GAS,
460
00:15:28,584 --> 00:15:29,375
E-DAWG.
Early: HELL, I KNOW THAT.
461
00:15:30,417 --> 00:15:31,834
THAT'S DINOSAUR JUICE!
462
00:15:31,918 --> 00:15:34,417
I MEAN, THEY SCIENTIFIFY
REFINE
IT AND, YOU KNOW, 'CAUSE WITH
463
00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:37,834
THE SCIENCE CHEMICALS AND ALL
AND THEN, UH, THEY SCIENCE
MAKES
464
00:15:37,918 --> 00:15:39,417
IT COME OUT AS GAS.
465
00:15:39,500 --> 00:15:42,000
'PRECIATE YOU E-DAWG, BUT,
UH, Y'ALL CAN KEEP YOUR SACK
466
00:15:42,083 --> 00:15:43,083
FULL OF TURDS.
467
00:15:43,167 --> 00:15:44,500
Lil: WE DON'T NEED YOUR
CHARITY.
468
00:15:44,584 --> 00:15:48,417
CAUSE MY MAN P-NUT HAS GOT HIM
A JOB INTERVIEW UP IN TOWN!
469
00:15:48,500 --> 00:15:50,959
[ LAUGHS ]
Dan Halen: WHAT DO YOU SEE
470
00:15:51,042 --> 00:15:52,209
AS YOUR STRENGTHS?
471
00:15:52,292 --> 00:15:54,250
I GUESS YOU COULD SAY I'M A
PEOPLE-PERSON --
472
00:15:54,334 --> 00:15:56,584
Dan Halen: NOW YOU LISTEN TO
MY STRENGTHS NOW!
473
00:15:56,667 --> 00:15:59,459
I HAVE MASSIVE WEALTH, ROGUISH
GOOD LOOKS, UNYIELDING POWER,
474
00:15:59,542 --> 00:16:01,626
AND OVERWHELMING HUMILITY!
475
00:16:01,709 --> 00:16:05,417
SO HOW IS IT THAT YOU, THE RUBE
WHISPERER, ARE ABLE TO WRAP THIS
476
00:16:05,500 --> 00:16:08,834
WHOLE TOWN AROUND YOUR FAT
FINGER WITH JUST A FEW
477
00:16:08,918 --> 00:16:12,542
CATCH PHRASES, A CORN DOG
PROJECTILE, AND A SMILE?
478
00:16:12,626 --> 00:16:16,459
YOU JUST GOT TO TRY TO
CONNECT WITH 'EM.
479
00:16:16,542 --> 00:16:18,334
Dan Halen: I'M ALREADY
CONNECTED WITH THEM!
480
00:16:18,417 --> 00:16:19,792
THROUGH SURVEILLANCE!
481
00:16:19,876 --> 00:16:22,000
BUT THEY'RE SO BORING TO WATCH!
482
00:16:22,083 --> 00:16:23,375
NO, MAN.
483
00:16:23,459 --> 00:16:25,584
YOU GOT TO GET WITH THEM ON A
PERSONAL LEVEL, DAWG.
484
00:16:25,667 --> 00:16:27,834
Dan Halen: HAND OVER THE
TECHNIQUE.
485
00:16:27,918 --> 00:16:29,834
I'LL PAY YOU A KING'S RANSOM.
486
00:16:29,918 --> 00:16:31,876
IT AIN'T REALLY SOMETHING
YOU BUY.
487
00:16:31,959 --> 00:16:34,459
Dan Halen: THEN I'LL HAVE IT
BEATEN FROM YOU.
488
00:16:34,542 --> 00:16:35,876
[ BEEP ]
PAGING THE BEATERS.
489
00:16:35,959 --> 00:16:37,209
BEATERS TO DAN HALEN'S OFFICE.
490
00:16:37,292 --> 00:16:38,209
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!
491
00:16:38,292 --> 00:16:39,709
WE AIN'T GOT TO DO THAT!
492
00:16:39,792 --> 00:16:42,250
I'M SURE I CAN PROBABLY TEACH
YOU SOME SOCIAL GAME, YOU KNOW,
493
00:16:42,334 --> 00:16:44,918
GET YOU STRAIGHTENED UP AND
EVERYTHIN', BALLIN' WITH
PEOPLE,
494
00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:45,876
YA FEEL ME?
495
00:16:45,959 --> 00:16:47,918
Dan Halen: I DO...FEEL YOU.
496
00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:51,250
GIVE ME SOME MORE STREET
GIBBERISH THAT I MIGHT USE TO
497
00:16:51,334 --> 00:16:54,083
LULL THESE CORN-SYRUP
ENTHUSIASTS INTO A FALSE SENSE
498
00:16:54,167 --> 00:16:55,209
OF SOLIDARITY.
499
00:16:55,292 --> 00:16:58,667
[ RAP MUSIC PLAYS ]
[ DOORBELL RINGS ]
500
00:16:58,751 --> 00:17:01,667
YOLO, GLENN. AND WIFE.
501
00:17:01,751 --> 00:17:04,834
YOU'RE STRAIGHT UP BALLING WITH
YOUR BITCH, I SEE.
502
00:17:04,918 --> 00:17:06,500
WHAT UP, GLENN? WHAT UP?
503
00:17:06,584 --> 00:17:08,334
I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE AT
WORK, RIGHT?
504
00:17:08,417 --> 00:17:09,834
UHH, IT'S SATURDAY, RIGHT?
505
00:17:09,918 --> 00:17:11,792
Dan Halen: NO, DAWG, NO.
506
00:17:11,876 --> 00:17:15,667
YOU'RE ENTIRELY CORRECT TO BE
STONE-COLD CHILLING IN YOUR CRIB
507
00:17:15,751 --> 00:17:16,709
AT THIS TIME.
508
00:17:16,792 --> 00:17:18,000
YOLO.
509
00:17:18,083 --> 00:17:20,751
I DON'T, UH...I DON'T --
Dan Halen: SWAG.
510
00:17:20,834 --> 00:17:23,959
WHAT, UH, WHAT --
WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE?
511
00:17:24,042 --> 00:17:26,709
Dan Halen: FREE BARBECUE
RIBS, GLENN.
512
00:17:26,792 --> 00:17:27,792
YOLO.
513
00:17:27,876 --> 00:17:30,751
GONNA MAKE IT RAIN RIBS UP IN
HERE, YOLO.
514
00:17:30,834 --> 00:17:31,918
NO! OH!
515
00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:33,292
OH, MY CHEST!
516
00:17:33,375 --> 00:17:34,959
OH, MY GOD! GLENN!
517
00:17:35,042 --> 00:17:38,584
Dan Halen: PERHAPS THOSE RIBS
COULD HAVE BEEN DEBONED, BUT NO
518
00:17:38,667 --> 00:17:39,292
MATTER.
SIGN THIS, NEXT-OF-KIN!
519
00:17:40,042 --> 00:17:41,375
CALL 911.
520
00:17:41,459 --> 00:17:44,709
Dan Halen: OR YOU, TOO, WILL
BE RIBBED FOR MY PLEASURE!
521
00:17:44,792 --> 00:17:48,167
FOOL, DID YOU NOT READ THE
CLAUSE ON PAGE 19?
522
00:17:48,250 --> 00:17:49,083
Early: MMM.
523
00:17:49,167 --> 00:17:50,626
WELL, HE SUMMULIZED IT FOR US.
524
00:17:50,709 --> 00:17:52,209
MAD FAT STACKS. YOLO.
525
00:17:52,292 --> 00:17:53,792
GETTIN' PAID. BARBECUE GUN.
526
00:17:53,876 --> 00:17:55,209
ALL THAT.
527
00:17:55,292 --> 00:17:58,209
THIS SAYS DAN HALEN CAN
DRILL HERE IN PERPETUITY.
528
00:17:58,292 --> 00:18:00,125
Early: THAT VINEGAR SAUCE
STINGS.
529
00:18:00,209 --> 00:18:02,751
AND HE AIN'T GOT TO PAY YOUR
DUMB ASS ONE THIN DIME.
530
00:18:02,834 --> 00:18:03,834
Granny: WAIT A MINUTE!
531
00:18:03,918 --> 00:18:04,626
WHAT, WHAT?
Rusty: WHAT, WHAT?
532
00:18:05,667 --> 00:18:06,417
Early: WELL, GOOD LUCK THEN.
533
00:18:06,500 --> 00:18:08,417
'CAUSE LOOK WHAT I DONE.
534
00:18:08,500 --> 00:18:10,167
RIPPED UP THE DAMN DRILLIN'
RIGHTS.
535
00:18:10,250 --> 00:18:11,584
JUST LIKE YOU DONE.
536
00:18:11,667 --> 00:18:12,667
IT DON'T WORK THAT WAY.
537
00:18:12,751 --> 00:18:14,334
THEY'VE GOT COPIES.
538
00:18:14,417 --> 00:18:15,083
Early: COPIES?
539
00:18:15,167 --> 00:18:16,709
THEY CAN DO THAT?
540
00:18:16,792 --> 00:18:20,042
YOU JUST RIPPED UP YOUR COPY,
DUMB ASS.
541
00:18:20,125 --> 00:18:21,500
Early: DAMN INTERNET!
542
00:18:21,584 --> 00:18:23,250
THANKS A LOT, OBAMA!
543
00:18:23,334 --> 00:18:24,626
Granny: MMM.
544
00:18:24,709 --> 00:18:25,876
WHY IN THE HELL...
545
00:18:25,959 --> 00:18:27,083
MMM.
546
00:18:27,167 --> 00:18:30,250
...DIDN'T YOU DO NOTHIN' TO
STOP
THIS, P-NUT?
547
00:18:30,334 --> 00:18:31,167
DAMN IT!
548
00:18:31,250 --> 00:18:32,250
I'VE TRIED TO SAVE YOUR ASSES.
549
00:18:32,334 --> 00:18:33,167
Early: Y'ALL CALM DOWN, NOW.
550
00:18:33,250 --> 00:18:34,709
I HAVE A PLAN.
551
00:18:34,792 --> 00:18:39,125
YOU CAN'T PUT DYNAMITE IN
DAN HALEN'S BUTT HOLE.
552
00:18:39,209 --> 00:18:40,667
Early: WHY THE HELL NOT?
553
00:18:40,751 --> 00:18:43,042
IT'S NOT LEGAL OR PRACTICAL,
OR PROBABLY EVEN POSSIBLE.
554
00:18:43,125 --> 00:18:44,876
Early: NAW, HE DONE GOT HIM
A BUTT HOLE.
555
00:18:44,959 --> 00:18:46,000
I SEEN IT.
556
00:18:46,083 --> 00:18:47,542
THAT'S NOT WHAT I'M TALKING
ABOUT!
557
00:18:47,626 --> 00:18:50,792
Early: WELL, THEN, YOU THEN
YOU COME UP WITH A DAMN IDEAR!
558
00:18:50,876 --> 00:18:54,042
THERE'S GOT TO BE SOME OLD
LAW ON THE BOOKS OR SOME ANIMAL
559
00:18:54,125 --> 00:18:56,250
WE GOT TO PROTECT OR
SOMETHING,
RIGHT?
560
00:18:56,334 --> 00:18:59,042
GREENPEACE USED TO NAIL OUR
ASSES WITH THIS ALL THE TIME.
561
00:18:59,125 --> 00:18:59,959
Rusty: HERE'S SOMETHING.
562
00:19:00,042 --> 00:19:01,626
"THE RED-WHISKER SHALEAMANDER."
563
00:19:01,709 --> 00:19:05,042
THIS ORNERY, BEARDED REPTILE
WAS
SAID TO LURK BELOW THE
564
00:19:05,125 --> 00:19:06,542
NORTH GEORGIA MOUNTAINS.
565
00:19:06,626 --> 00:19:09,125
CHILDREN WERE TOLD THAT IF THEY
DIDN'T FINISH THEIR OKRA, HE'D
566
00:19:09,209 --> 00:19:11,918
"CLIMB OUT OF THE EARTH AND
UN-DARN ALL THEIR SOCKS."
567
00:19:12,000 --> 00:19:14,500
SOUNDS LIKE A FAIRY TALE,
RUZZY.
568
00:19:14,584 --> 00:19:15,083
Sheriff: NUH-UH! UNH-UNH!
THAT'S REAL!
569
00:19:16,083 --> 00:19:17,709
MY MAMA TOLD ME ABOUT THAT!
570
00:19:17,792 --> 00:19:22,792
HOW ABOUT THAT WE JUST TELL
DAN HALEN IT'S A WILDLIFE REFUGE
571
00:19:22,876 --> 00:19:24,626
FOR THE RED-WHISKER
SHALEAMANDER, AND HE WON'T BE
572
00:19:24,709 --> 00:19:25,792
ABLE TO DRILL!
573
00:19:25,876 --> 00:19:27,459
Rusty: YOU REALLY THINK THIS
IS GONNA WORK?
574
00:19:27,542 --> 00:19:29,250
HELL YES, IT'S GONNA WORK.
575
00:19:29,334 --> 00:19:30,500
WHAT, WHAT!
576
00:19:30,584 --> 00:19:32,751
Dan Halen: YOUR MORONIC RUSE
DOES NOT WORK!
577
00:19:32,834 --> 00:19:34,000
Sheriff: Y'ALL, IT DIDN'T
WORK.
578
00:19:34,083 --> 00:19:35,042
DAMN IT.
579
00:19:35,125 --> 00:19:36,334
Dan Halen: BRING IN THE
DRILL!
580
00:19:36,417 --> 00:19:37,209
Rusty: HOLD ON, Y'ALL!
581
00:19:37,292 --> 00:19:38,375
WAIT A MINUTE NOW!
582
00:19:38,459 --> 00:19:39,542
I MEAN, WHAT IF WE ANGER THE
SHALEAMANDER?
583
00:19:39,626 --> 00:19:40,292
Dan Halen: HE'LL WHAT?
584
00:19:40,375 --> 00:19:42,751
UN-DARN MY SOCKS?
585
00:19:42,834 --> 00:19:48,334
I DON'T WEAR SHOES, MOTHER
FUCKER TONIGHT WE DINE ON
MONEY!
586
00:19:48,417 --> 00:19:52,292
[ LAUGHING MANIACALLY ]
[ GRINDING, CRUNCHING ]
587
00:19:52,375 --> 00:19:53,751
WHAT'S GOING ON OVER THERE?
588
00:19:53,834 --> 00:19:59,083
COMMENCE WITH THE FRACKING AS
ORDERED!
589
00:19:59,167 --> 00:20:01,417
OH, HELL NO!
590
00:20:01,500 --> 00:20:02,584
Rusty: WHAT THE HELL?
591
00:20:02,667 --> 00:20:03,500
THAT THING'S FOR REAL?
Dan Halen: SHOOT HIM!
592
00:20:04,417 --> 00:20:05,417
SHOOT HIM, SHERIFF!
593
00:20:05,500 --> 00:20:06,125
SHOOT HIM AT ONCE.
594
00:20:06,209 --> 00:20:07,292
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
595
00:20:07,375 --> 00:20:09,083
Sheriff: HE KNOWS I DIDN'T
EAT MY OKRA!
596
00:20:09,167 --> 00:20:11,500
MAC AND CHEESE SHOULD COUNT AS
A VEGETABLE.
597
00:20:11,584 --> 00:20:13,292
HELL, IT'S LISTED AS A SIDE!
598
00:20:13,375 --> 00:20:16,626
[ TIRES SQUEAL ]
Early: MY CRIB!
599
00:20:16,709 --> 00:20:17,542
Granny: OHH!
600
00:20:17,626 --> 00:20:18,709
Rusty: GRANNY! GRANNY! NO!
601
00:20:18,792 --> 00:20:20,292
[ GUNSHOT ]
Granny: WAIT, NO!
602
00:20:20,375 --> 00:20:21,209
DON'T SHOOT!
603
00:20:21,292 --> 00:20:23,542
[ GUNSHOT ]
NOBODY SHOOT!
604
00:20:23,626 --> 00:20:26,626
I THINK THIS -- THIS SAVAGE
CRITTER...
605
00:20:26,709 --> 00:20:30,000
[ PURRS ]
Granny: SEES A LOVE IN ME
606
00:20:30,083 --> 00:20:33,459
THAT ONLY EXISTS --
[ SNORTING, CHEWING ]
607
00:20:33,542 --> 00:20:34,500
Early: THAT'S IT!
608
00:20:34,584 --> 00:20:36,459
KEEP HIM BUSY WITH YOUR
CHEWINESS!
609
00:20:36,542 --> 00:20:37,500
Rusty: P-NUT! NO!
610
00:20:37,584 --> 00:20:40,000
DID YOU ET YOUR OKRAS!
611
00:20:40,083 --> 00:20:41,334
YEAH, DOC. YEAH, YEAH.
612
00:20:41,417 --> 00:20:42,959
DON'T YOU LIE TO ME!
613
00:20:43,042 --> 00:20:44,667
I LOVE IT, TOO. IT'S GOOD.
614
00:20:44,751 --> 00:20:47,709
WITH THE CORNMEAL AND --
LET ME SMELL YOUR BREATH!
615
00:20:47,792 --> 00:20:49,626
EASY. I JUST HAD A MINT.
616
00:20:49,709 --> 00:20:53,125
SO IT'S GONNA SWITCH UP THE
FLAVOR, OKAY?
617
00:20:53,209 --> 00:20:56,083
[ EXHALES ]
[ SNIFFS DEEPLY ]
618
00:20:56,167 --> 00:20:58,083
YOU DIDN'T ET NO OKRAS, DID YA?
619
00:20:58,167 --> 00:20:58,918
WAIT!
620
00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:00,292
OKRAS GOOD FOR YOU!
621
00:21:00,375 --> 00:21:01,876
WHAT WHA...
622
00:21:01,959 --> 00:21:03,417
Lil: BABY, NOOOO!
623
00:21:03,500 --> 00:21:04,834
Rusty: P-NUT!
624
00:21:04,918 --> 00:21:07,918
[ BOTH SOBBING ]
Dan Halen: OKAY.
625
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:09,792
SO...WE GOOD HERE?
626
00:21:09,876 --> 00:21:12,042
RECOMMENCE THE FRACKING!
627
00:21:19,250 --> 00:21:22,250
Rusty: [ SNIFFLES ]
Early: WELL, WHAT CAN I SAY?
628
00:21:22,334 --> 00:21:24,751
P-NUT SHOULD HAVE ET HIS OKRA,
YOU KNOW.
629
00:21:24,834 --> 00:21:27,000
Rusty: I THOUGHT THE
SHALEAMANDER ONLY UN-DARNS YOUR
630
00:21:27,083 --> 00:21:28,542
SOCKS.
631
00:21:28,626 --> 00:21:30,375
Early: HE ALSO UN-DARNS YOUR
INTESTINES, NERVE BUNDLES,
632
00:21:30,459 --> 00:21:31,834
WIGGLY BRAIN MATTER.
633
00:21:31,918 --> 00:21:34,709
YEAH, THEY DON'T MENTION THAT
IN
THE POP-UP BOOK, DO THEY?
634
00:21:34,792 --> 00:21:36,709
Rusty: IMMA POUR ONE OUT
FOR MY HOMEBOY P-NUT.
635
00:21:36,792 --> 00:21:38,375
Early: DON'T YOU POUR NOTHING
ON THAT GAS!
636
00:21:38,459 --> 00:21:40,584
YOU'RE GONNA BE CONTAMMULIZIN'
THAT SUMBITCH!
637
00:21:40,667 --> 00:21:42,375
Rusty: DADDY, DAN HALEN GOT
ALL THE GAS, AND YOU DIDN'T GET
638
00:21:42,459 --> 00:21:43,876
JACK-SQUAT.
639
00:21:43,959 --> 00:21:46,167
Early: THEN HOW COME I GOT
THIS HERE MONEY-CHECK IN MY HAND
640
00:21:46,250 --> 00:21:47,417
IN THE MAIL?
641
00:21:47,500 --> 00:21:48,751
Lil: THAT'S MINE.
642
00:21:48,834 --> 00:21:51,918
P-NUT HAD AN INSURANCE POLICY
ON THE HO-YO STAND.
643
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:54,584
Early: WE ALL FAMILY HERE,
LIL, SO WE GONNA SPLIT IT EQUAL
644
00:21:54,667 --> 00:21:55,792
LIKE.
645
00:21:55,876 --> 00:21:57,250
Rusty: NO, DADDY, DON'T
SPLIT IT EQUAL!
646
00:21:57,334 --> 00:21:59,417
Early: GRAB YOUR SHARE NOW,
'CAUSE WE RICHER THAN HELL,
647
00:21:59,500 --> 00:22:00,459
BABY!
648
00:22:00,542 --> 00:22:02,792
GOIN' ABOUT MY BUSINESS
EVERYDAY.
649
00:22:02,876 --> 00:22:05,792
YOU KNOW I BE ABOUT
MY BUSINESS EVERYWAY.
650
00:22:05,876 --> 00:22:08,792
YOU KNOW I BE ABOUT
MY BUSINESS ALL THE TIME.
651
00:22:08,876 --> 00:22:11,959
YOU KNOW I BE ABOUT MY
BUSINESS.
652
00:22:12,042 --> 00:22:13,834
I GET A HEALTHY PERDIEM
WHEN MY SUPERVISOR
653
00:22:13,918 --> 00:22:15,876
SEE'S THAT I AM
EXCEEDING QUOTAS
654
00:22:15,959 --> 00:22:17,918
LIKE EVERY DAMN DAY.
655
00:22:18,000 --> 00:22:20,918
GET YOUR CONTRACT SIGNED
AND YOUR WHOLE TOWN IS MINE
656
00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:22,918
BUYNG LAND, GETTING HO'S
WHAT WHAT
47263
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