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[ STATIC ]
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[ COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYS ]
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>> ♪ MY DREAMS ARE ALL DEAD AND
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BURIED ♪
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♪ SOMETIMES I WISH THE SUN WOULD
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JUST EXPLODE ♪
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♪ WHEN GOD COMES AND CALLS ME TO
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HIS KINGDOM ♪
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♪ I'LL TAKE ALL YOU SONS OF
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BITCHES WHEN I GO ♪
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[ YODELING ]
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>> Rusty: MY TURN.
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>> Early: HELL NO.
>> Rusty: MAN, LET ME DRIVE THAT
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THING!
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>> Early: DO NOT TOUCH THE TRIM!
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GOD REST YOUR SOUL,
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COCK JOHNSON.
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BUT ONCE YOU HIT THAT WALL IN
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POCONO, AIN'T ENOUGH HEADACHE
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POWDER IN THIS WORLD COULD PUT
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YOUR BRAIN BACK TOGETHER.
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>> Boyd: EXCUSE ME, EARLY, MY
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GOUT'S ACTIN' UP.
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>> Early: YOU KEEP YOUR ASS ON
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THE FLOOR!
THAT WAS A MOMENT OF RESPECT!
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THIS HERE IS STILL A ROBBERY!
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[ BELL DINGS ]
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>> Sheriff: STOP WHAT YOU'RE
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DOIN' RIGHT NOW!
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[ Singsong voice ] GUESS WHO'S
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GETTIN' MARRIED!
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>> Early: I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!
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SOMEBODY'S FINALLY TAMED THIS
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OLD ROWDY BEAST!
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>> Boyd: ISN'T THAT WONDERFUL
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NEWS!
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>> Sheriff: [ Normal voice ]
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YEAH, I'M OFF THE MARKET NOW.
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THERE SHE IS OUT THERE ON THE
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HOG.
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[ ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ]
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>> Early: GOD ALMIGHTY!
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SHE'S HOTTER THAN THE HANDLE ON
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THE GATES TO HELL!
HOW'D YOU MEET HER?
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YOU DOPE HER UP WITH A RAG?
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[ CHUCKLES ]
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>> Sheriff: UH, WELL, WE JUST
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KIND OF HIT IT OFF.
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>> Early: I'D LIKE TO HIT IT OFF
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WITH THEM BOOBIES.
[ CHUCKLES ]
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KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'?
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>> Sheriff: YEAH, I-I KNOW WHAT
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YOU'RE SAYIN', EARLY.
>> Early: MAMMARIES.
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YOU KNOW THEM GLANDS THAT
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SECRETES THE MILK?
MAMMALS GOT 'EM?
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>> Sheriff: UGH, THEY SECRETE
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STUFF?
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>> Early: YUP.
ONCE SHE SPITS OUT A COUPLE OF
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YOUNG'ERNS AND YOU DON'T WANT
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NO RELATIONS WITH HER NO MORE.
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YOU TIRE OF HER QUICKLY.
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>> Sheriff: WELL, WE'RE NOT
GONNA TRY FOR CHILDREN RIGHT
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AWAY -- NOT UNTIL NEXT WEEK,
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AFTER OUR SPECIAL DAY, YOU KNOW?
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ON THAT NOTE, BOYD, I WOULD
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LIKE THE RUBBER, PLEASE.
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>> Boyd: WELL, I'M SORRY,
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SHERIFF.
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WE'RE PLUM OUT OF THOSE.
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I ACTUALLY HAD THE LAST ONE
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STOLEN FROM ME HERE JUST THIS
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MORNIN'.
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[ CREAK! ]
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[ FIZZLE! ]
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>> Sheriff: WELL, GIVE ME A
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HOLLER WHEN YOUR NEW SHIPMENT
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ARRIVES.
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I'VE WAITED 45 YEARS.
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[ Chuckling ] I GUESS I CAN WAIT
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ANOTHER FEW DAYS.
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[ BELL DINGS ]
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[ ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ]
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[ ENGINE REVS ]
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>> Boyd: WHY DO YOU THINK HE
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TOOK THAT HELMET OFF IF HE WAS
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JUST GONNA PUT IT RIGHT BACK ON?
>> Early: GET IN THAT CORNER!
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[ KEYBOARD CLACKING ]
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>> MARRIAGE ISN'T ALL WINE AND
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ROSES.
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LORD KNOWS CHARLENE AND I HAVE
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HAD OUR BUMPS IN THE ROAD.
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[ CHUCKLES ]
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BUT AS LONG AS YOU GO INTO THE
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MARRIAGE WITH THE UNDERSTANDING
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THAT THE WOMAN BELONGS TO THE
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MAN AND IS TO DO HIS BIDDING,
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OBEY HIS COMMANDS, AND HARBOR NO
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AMBITIONS OF HER OWN --
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[ CELLPHONE CHIMES ]
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UH, SHERIFF, IS SHE ALLOWED TO
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HAVE A PHONE?
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>> Sheriff: UH, IRINA, HONEY,
YOU'RE [CHUCKLES] KIND OF
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CHEWIN' UP MY BATTERY THERE.
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[ CLACKING CONTINUES ]
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>> SO, TELL ME, IRINA, HOW DID
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YOU MEET THIS YOUNG BUCK OVER
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HERE?
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>> Sheriff: EH, FUNNY STORY,
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ACTUALLY.
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SHE WAS DRIVIN' A OUT-OF-CONTROL
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BUS THAT HAD A BOMB ON BOARD.
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SOME MANIAC HAD PUT IT ON THERE,
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AND IF SHE WENT UNDER 55 --
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>> I THINK WE'VE ALL SEEN THE
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MOVIE "SPEED."
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BUT I'M KIND OF ANXIOUS TO HEAR
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THE STORY FROM IRINA'S
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SURGICALLY-ENHANCED LIPS.
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>> [ Russian accent ]
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Russianbridecruise.biz.
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I REQUEST SURGEON.
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HE IS SURGEON.
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>> Sheriff: UH, HONEY, COULD YOU
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TAKE ANOTHER ONE OF YOUR
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FREQUENT SMOKE BREAKS OUTSIDE
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FOR A MINUTE?
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>> UGH, THIS 3BS IS CRAP.
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I WANT 4S LTE OR MARRIAGE IS
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OFF.
HATE THIS PHONE.
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[ DOOR CLOSES ]
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>> [ Chuckling ] WELL, I'VE
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CERTAINLY GOT SOME FODDER FOR
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THE SENIOR SPAGHETTI SOCIAL THIS
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SUNDAY.
>> Sheriff: LOOK, REVEREND,
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WE'RE ADULTS.
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WE KNOW WHAT WE'RE GETTIN' INTO.
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>> MM...I CAN'T, IN GOOD
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CONSCIENCE, PRESIDE OVER SUCH A
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UNION, KNOWING THAT OUR YOUTH
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CENTER, THE TEEN CHILL ZONE,
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IS WITHOUT NEON SIGNAGE.
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>> Sheriff: [ SIGHS ]
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ALL RIGHT, FINE.
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BUT THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN ON
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SUNDAY.
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>> SUNDAY?
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[ Chuckling ] OH, THAT'S A BUSY
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DAY FOR US.
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WITH ALL THE EXTRA PEOPLE, WE
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MAY NEED A NEW FLAT-SCREEN TO
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PLAY TO THE BACK ROW, YOU KNOW?
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>> Sheriff: FINE, BUT YOU HAVE
TO KEEP QUIET ABOUT THIS
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RUSSIAN-CRUISE THING.
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>> YEAH. YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.
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I CAN TELL YOU BOTH ARE VERY
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MUCH IN LOVE.
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>> Sheriff: HERE WE ARE!
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[ CRASH! ]
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WELCOME TO YOUR NEW HOME!
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>> THIS IS SMALL HOUSE FOR
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SURGEON.
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>> Sheriff: UH, WELL, WE CAN
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MOVE MAMA'S IRON LUNG OUT OF THE
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LIVIN' ROOM AND PUT HER DOWN IN
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THE CRAWL SPACE.
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>> [ Echoing ] OH, NO!
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PLEASE DON'T!
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>> Sheriff: SHE NEEDS TO BE MORE
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INDEPENDENT ANYWAY.
HEY, I-I GOT SOMETHING SPECIAL I
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WANT TO SHOW YOU OUT BACK, ALL
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RIGHT?
SURPRISE!
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>> SURPRISE ON ME.
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WHERE IS POOL?
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YOU HAVE OTHER HOUSE?
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>> Sheriff: NO, LOOK, HONEY,
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POTATOES!
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I PLANTED THEM JUST FOR YOU.
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DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOU USED TO
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RAISE POTATOES OR SOMETHIN'?
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>> I SLAVE IN POTATO FIELD FROM
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AGE FOUR, HANDS BLEEDING, SO
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PAPA COULD MAKE VODKA IN
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BATHTUB.
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THEN KGB SHOOT PAPA DEAD IN
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FRONT OF FAMILY.
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>> Sheriff: SO, YEAH, THIS IS
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SOMETHIN' FUN WE CAN DO
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TOGETHER.
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Y'ALL RAISED GOATS, TOO, THERE,
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DIDN'T YOU?
WELL, JUST TAKE A PEEK OVER
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THERE.
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WHO'S LOOKIN' AROUND THE CORNER?
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>> HYAH!
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[ METAL SCRAPES ]
[ THUD ]
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DRAIN BLOOD SO MEAT NOT SPOIL.
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>> Sheriff: UH, HONEY, UH...
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I-I GOT TO HEAD INTO TOWN TO --
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TO SCRUB UP FOR SURGERY.
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[ SIGHS ]
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THANK GOD IT'S STILL GOT THE TAG
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ON IT.
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[ RIP! ]
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[ SQUISH! ]
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>> Early: WHAT IN THE HELL YOU
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DOIN' HERE?
YOU OUGHT TO BE BACK AT YOUR
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HOUSE WITH THAT LITTLE GAL OF
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YOURS, MAKIN' THE BEAST WITH TWO
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BACKS.
>> Sheriff: [ SIGHS ]
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I GUESS I GOT SOME PRE-WEDDIN'
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JITTERS, EARLY.
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>> Early: MARRIAGE IS HARD WORK,
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SHERIFF, AND YOU KNOW MY RECORD
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WITH WORK -- I DO NOT DO IT.
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>> Sheriff: HOW'D YOU AND
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KRYSTAL MAKE IT THROUGH ALL THEM
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TOUGH TIMES?
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>> Early: LISTEN, THERE'S GONNA
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BE TIMES WHEN SHE CALLS YOU "A
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00:05:45,378 --> 00:05:46,646
GREEN-ASS RUNT THAT AIN'T NO
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00:05:46,713 --> 00:05:47,513
BIGGER THAN A DAMN BOOGER."
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AND WHEN THAT HAPPENS -- HMM --
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YOU JUST GOT TO WHIP OFF YOUR
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BELT AND SHOW HER THE SNAPPIN'
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SOUND IT MAKES.
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>> Sheriff: IT'S JUST NOT LIKE
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IT WAS BACK IN THE BEGINNIN' --
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ON TUESDAY.
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I FELT I REALLY GOT A GOOD LOOK
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INTO HER SOUL DURIN' THAT SPEED
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DATE, BUT NOW IT'S ALL
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DIFFERENT.
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00:06:03,830 --> 00:06:04,897
>> Early: WELL, SHE'S TOO DAMN
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00:06:04,997 --> 00:06:05,898
GOOD-LOOKIN' FOR YOU.
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>> Sheriff: UH, THANKS, EARLY.
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>> Early: NO, I MEAN, WHAT DOES
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SHE SEE IN YOU?
IF SHE'S GOLD DIGGIN', SHE'S
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DIGGIN' IN THE WRONG DAMN PLACE.
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YOU'RE PAUNCHY, YOU'RE BALD,
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YOU CAN'T DO YOUR JOB WORTH A
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DAMN.
SEE? I JUST STOLE'D YOUR GUN.
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>> Sheriff: OH, DAMN IT.
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>> Early: WHAT DOES THAT HOT-ASS
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BITCH SEE IN YOU?!
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>> Sheriff: I JUST WISH SHE'D
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LOOK UP FROM THAT DAMN PHONE AND
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LOOK ME IN THE EYE SO I CAN SEE
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IF OUR LOVE'S STILL REAL.
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>> Early: I CAN FIND OUT.
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HELL, IT'S JUST LIKE TRAPPIN'
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OPOSSUMS.
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BUT YOU GOT TO SET BAIT, AND
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THAT BAIT HAD BETTER BE LEAFY
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AND GREEN.
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[ KEYBOARD CLACKING ]
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>> Sheriff: HEY, HONEY?
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00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:37,797
SWEETHEART?
257
00:06:37,897 --> 00:06:39,432
DID YOU GET A CHANCE TO LISTEN
258
00:06:39,532 --> 00:06:39,932
TO THE BAND DEMOS FOR THE
259
00:06:40,032 --> 00:06:41,534
RECEPTION?
260
00:06:41,601 --> 00:06:42,301
I THINK THESE GUYS ON THE
261
00:06:42,402 --> 00:06:43,703
RAILROAD TRACKS LOOK PRETTY
262
00:06:43,770 --> 00:06:45,304
COOL.
263
00:06:45,405 --> 00:06:46,539
AS YOU KNOW, I'M LOADED,
264
00:06:46,606 --> 00:06:47,373
BUT -- BUT WE COULD SAVE A
265
00:06:47,440 --> 00:06:49,642
LITTLE MONEY GETTIN' THIS DJ I
266
00:06:49,742 --> 00:06:50,610
KNOW.
267
00:06:50,710 --> 00:06:51,878
>> I NEED GO TO TOWN FOR FASTER
268
00:06:51,944 --> 00:06:53,646
INTERNET.
269
00:06:53,746 --> 00:06:54,480
[ DOOR OPENS ]
270
00:06:54,580 --> 00:06:55,548
>> Sheriff: WELL, HURRY BACK.
271
00:06:55,615 --> 00:06:56,716
WE GOT TO PICK OUT SOME CEMETERY
272
00:06:56,783 --> 00:06:57,817
PLOTS.
273
00:06:57,917 --> 00:06:59,419
I'M NOT LETTIN' YOU [Chuckling]
274
00:06:59,485 --> 00:07:00,153
GET AWAY FROM ME, NOT EVEN IN
275
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:01,954
THE COLD GRIP OF DEATH!
276
00:07:02,054 --> 00:07:03,623
[ SIREN CHIRPS ]
277
00:07:11,097 --> 00:07:11,898
[ DOOR CLOSES ]
278
00:07:11,964 --> 00:07:13,399
ALL RIGHT. WHAT'D YOU FIND OUT?
279
00:07:13,466 --> 00:07:14,801
>> Early: WELL, SHE WASN'T GOIN'
280
00:07:14,901 --> 00:07:15,968
INTO TOWN FOR NO FAST INTERNET,
281
00:07:16,068 --> 00:07:17,403
THAT'S FOR DAMN SURE.
282
00:07:17,470 --> 00:07:18,805
SEE THIS FELLOW RIGHT HERE?
283
00:07:18,905 --> 00:07:20,573
>> Sheriff: SHE TOLD ME THAT GUY
284
00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:21,574
WAS HER BROTHER.
285
00:07:21,641 --> 00:07:22,241
>> Early: SHE TOLD ME THAT, TOO.
286
00:07:22,308 --> 00:07:23,910
>> Sheriff: OH, GOOD.
287
00:07:23,976 --> 00:07:24,644
THANK GOD IT'S HER BROTHER.
288
00:07:24,744 --> 00:07:26,078
>> Early: YEAH, IT IS HER
289
00:07:26,145 --> 00:07:26,913
BROTHER.
290
00:07:26,979 --> 00:07:27,914
YEAH, THEY WAS IN THERE A LONG
291
00:07:27,980 --> 00:07:28,948
TIME.
292
00:07:29,015 --> 00:07:29,649
THEY WAS PROBABLY TALKING ABOUT
293
00:07:29,749 --> 00:07:30,783
THE WEDDING, YA KNOW.
294
00:07:30,850 --> 00:07:32,018
WE'LL JUST FAST-FORWARD THROUGH
295
00:07:32,118 --> 00:07:33,186
THIS.
296
00:07:33,286 --> 00:07:35,621
ALL RIGHT, SLOW, SLOW, SLOW.
297
00:07:35,688 --> 00:07:38,591
ALL RIGHT. AND...HERE.
298
00:07:38,658 --> 00:07:40,993
IN I ROLL, LOOKIN' FINE AS WINE,
299
00:07:41,093 --> 00:07:43,095
COUPLE OF TASTY BITCHES AT MY
300
00:07:43,162 --> 00:07:43,930
SIDE.
>> Sheriff: YOU -- YOU BROUGHT
301
00:07:44,597 --> 00:07:45,498
GIRLS WITH YOU?
302
00:07:45,598 --> 00:07:46,432
>> Early: A MILLIONAIRE
303
00:07:46,499 --> 00:07:48,434
PLAYBOY'S GOT TO LOOK THE PART.
304
00:07:48,501 --> 00:07:49,936
NOW, THIS HERE IS ME OFFERIN'
305
00:07:50,002 --> 00:07:51,604
TO -- TO MAKE LOVE TO HER ON THE
306
00:07:51,671 --> 00:07:52,438
HOOD OF THE BUGATTI WITH, UH,
307
00:07:52,505 --> 00:07:54,674
THESE TWO OTHER WOMANS, ALSO.
308
00:07:54,774 --> 00:07:55,541
>> Sheriff: BUGATTI?
309
00:07:55,641 --> 00:07:56,609
>> Early: THAT'S A RENTAL.
310
00:07:56,676 --> 00:07:57,810
THANK GOD, TOO, 'CAUSE IT'S AT
311
00:07:57,877 --> 00:07:58,644
THE BOTTOM OF THE DAMN RAVINE.
312
00:07:58,711 --> 00:08:00,112
THAT SUMBITCH WAS HARD AS HELL
313
00:08:00,179 --> 00:08:00,947
TO HANDLE.
>> Sheriff: EARLY, THAT MONEY
314
00:08:01,681 --> 00:08:02,782
WAS FOR FLASH ONLY!
315
00:08:02,849 --> 00:08:03,449
I WAS SUPPOSED TO RETURN IT TO
316
00:08:03,516 --> 00:08:04,851
THE EVIDENCE ROOM!
317
00:08:04,951 --> 00:08:05,852
>> Early: YOU'RE MISSIN' THE BIG
318
00:08:05,952 --> 00:08:06,853
PICTURE, HOSS.
319
00:08:06,953 --> 00:08:08,454
I OFFERED TO MAKE LOVE TO HER,
320
00:08:08,521 --> 00:08:09,889
AND SHE TURNED ME DOWN FLAT!
321
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:10,990
YOU KNOW WHY?
322
00:08:11,057 --> 00:08:12,191
'CAUSE HER HEART LIES WITH YOU!
323
00:08:12,291 --> 00:08:14,560
>> Sheriff: WELL, I GUESS THAT'S
324
00:08:14,660 --> 00:08:15,728
ONE WAY OF LOOKIN' AT THIS.
325
00:08:15,828 --> 00:08:16,729
>> Early: THAT'S RIGHT!
326
00:08:16,829 --> 00:08:17,530
[ BED SQUEAKING, THUMPING ]
327
00:08:17,630 --> 00:08:19,131
THERE THEY GO AGAIN, TALKIN'
328
00:08:19,198 --> 00:08:19,832
ABOUT THE WEDDIN'.
329
00:08:19,899 --> 00:08:20,867
>> [ Muffled ] OH, YES!
330
00:08:20,967 --> 00:08:21,400
THANKING YOU!
331
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:22,635
[ SHATTER! ]
332
00:08:22,702 --> 00:08:23,836
I AM THANKING YOU, YES!
333
00:08:23,903 --> 00:08:24,704
>> Sheriff: YEAH.
334
00:08:24,804 --> 00:08:25,972
TALKIN' REAL LOUD ABOUT IT, TOO,
335
00:08:26,038 --> 00:08:27,640
AIN'T THEY?
336
00:08:27,707 --> 00:08:28,975
>> Early: YUP, AGAINST THE
337
00:08:29,041 --> 00:08:30,843
WALL...REPEATEDLY.
338
00:08:30,910 --> 00:08:32,678
>> [ MOANING ]
339
00:08:32,745 --> 00:08:33,479
[ BANG! ]
340
00:08:33,546 --> 00:08:34,714
>> Sheriff: THAT'S NOT YOUR
341
00:08:34,814 --> 00:08:36,582
BROTHER ON TOP OF YOU AT ALL, IS
342
00:08:36,682 --> 00:08:37,149
IT?!
>> [ LAUGHS ]
343
00:08:38,017 --> 00:08:39,151
LOOK, HE'S DETECTIVE NOW.
344
00:08:39,218 --> 00:08:41,888
>> Sheriff: I'M THE MAN, AND
345
00:08:41,988 --> 00:08:43,422
YOU'RE -- YOU'RE -- YOU'RE
346
00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:44,257
SUPPOSED TO OBEY MY COMMANDS,
347
00:08:44,357 --> 00:08:46,893
AND I -- [GROANS] THIS -- THIS
348
00:08:46,993 --> 00:08:48,661
IS OVER!
349
00:08:48,728 --> 00:08:49,929
[ MENDELSSOHN'S "WEDDING MARCH"
350
00:08:50,029 --> 00:08:50,596
PLAYS ]
351
00:08:50,696 --> 00:08:52,899
>> I PRESENT MR. AND
352
00:08:52,999 --> 00:08:54,667
MRS. SHERIFF!
353
00:08:54,734 --> 00:08:55,668
>> Sheriff: WE'RE GONNA SEE A
354
00:08:55,735 --> 00:08:56,769
COUNSELOR AFTER THE HONEYMOON.
355
00:08:56,869 --> 00:08:57,203
SHE'S COMMITTED TO MAKE IT
356
00:08:57,270 --> 00:08:58,371
WORK.
357
00:08:58,437 --> 00:08:59,539
[ SOFT MUSIC PLAYS ]
358
00:08:59,605 --> 00:09:00,773
HERE'S ME CUTTIN' THE CAKE,
359
00:09:00,873 --> 00:09:03,042
HERE'S ME DANCIN' WITH MAMA.
360
00:09:03,109 --> 00:09:05,444
[ Voice breaking ] AND HERE'S
361
00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:06,345
IRINA RIDIN' OFF ON MY
362
00:09:06,412 --> 00:09:09,715
MOTORCYCLE WITH A GUY THAT SHE
363
00:09:09,782 --> 00:09:12,051
SAID WAS HER BROTHER, AND HERE'S
364
00:09:12,118 --> 00:09:14,554
ME TELLIN' EVERYONE TO STOP
365
00:09:14,620 --> 00:09:15,788
THROWIN' RICE AT ME.
366
00:09:15,888 --> 00:09:16,789
[ SOBS ]
367
00:09:16,889 --> 00:09:17,557
>> Rusty: OH, MAN, YOU LOOKIN'
KIND OF PUFFY IN THAT ONE.
368
00:09:18,591 --> 00:09:19,792
>> Sheriff: THAT'S BECAUSE I'M
369
00:09:19,892 --> 00:09:20,626
ALLERGIC TO RICE!
370
00:09:20,726 --> 00:09:22,094
I TOLD IRINA I WANTED BUBBLES.
371
00:09:22,194 --> 00:09:23,029
THAT'S THE ONE DAMN THING I
372
00:09:23,095 --> 00:09:24,196
ASKED HER TO HANDLE!
373
00:09:24,263 --> 00:09:27,400
OH, AND HERE'S THE HONEYMOON!
374
00:09:27,466 --> 00:09:28,801
>> Granny: OH, SHERIFF, YOU
375
00:09:28,901 --> 00:09:30,570
AIN'T GOT TO GO THROUGH ALL THIS
376
00:09:30,636 --> 00:09:31,370
AGAIN.
>> Sheriff: ARE YOU SURE YOU
377
00:09:32,271 --> 00:09:33,806
DON'T WANT TO SEE ME PLAYIN'
378
00:09:33,906 --> 00:09:36,075
MINIGOLF ALL BY MYSELF OR HAVIN'
379
00:09:36,142 --> 00:09:38,110
THE DIVORCE PAPERS SERVED ON ME
380
00:09:38,210 --> 00:09:38,978
AT RUBY FALLS?
381
00:09:39,078 --> 00:09:40,713
THAT'S A GOOD'N OF ME TRYIN' TO
382
00:09:40,780 --> 00:09:41,213
DROWN MYSELF IN THE HOT TUB,
383
00:09:41,280 --> 00:09:42,748
AIN'T IT?
384
00:09:42,815 --> 00:09:43,783
>> Early: WELL, NOW, YOU STILL
385
00:09:43,883 --> 00:09:44,884
GOT YOUR HOUSE, AIN'T YA?
386
00:09:44,951 --> 00:09:46,085
I MEAN, SHE LET YOU BUY HER OUT
387
00:09:46,152 --> 00:09:47,053
OF IT, RIGHT?
388
00:09:47,119 --> 00:09:48,054
>> Sheriff: YEAH, BUT I CAN
389
00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:48,888
NEVER GO BACK THERE.
390
00:09:48,955 --> 00:09:50,656
>> Early: WELL, WHY WON'T YOU?
391
00:09:50,756 --> 00:09:51,390
>> Granny: IT'S YOUR HOME.
392
00:09:51,457 --> 00:09:53,426
YOU SHOULD GO THERE NOW.
393
00:09:53,492 --> 00:09:54,994
>> Sheriff: OH, IT -- IT'S NOT A
394
00:09:55,094 --> 00:09:55,928
HOME.
IT'S JUST A HOUSE FULL OF
395
00:09:56,896 --> 00:09:57,830
MEMORIES.
396
00:09:57,930 --> 00:09:59,231
I THINK I'LL JUST STAY HERE WITH
397
00:09:59,298 --> 00:10:00,066
Y'ALL.
398
00:10:00,132 --> 00:10:01,233
>> Early: FAMILY MEETIN' ON THE
399
00:10:01,300 --> 00:10:02,068
PORCH.
400
00:10:02,134 --> 00:10:03,736
NOT YOU!
401
00:10:03,803 --> 00:10:04,570
[ SLOSH! ]
I'M GONNA SMOKE HIS ASS THE HELL
402
00:10:05,237 --> 00:10:06,839
OUT OF THERE!
403
00:10:06,939 --> 00:10:08,107
>> Granny: THAT'S NO WAY TO
404
00:10:08,174 --> 00:10:09,609
TREAT HIM AFTER ALL HE DONE FOR
405
00:10:09,675 --> 00:10:10,977
US OVER THE YEARS.
406
00:10:11,077 --> 00:10:12,244
WE NEED TO HELP HIM MOVE ON WITH
407
00:10:12,311 --> 00:10:15,147
HIS LIFE, GIVE HIM THE CLOSURE
408
00:10:15,247 --> 00:10:17,016
HE SO DESPERATELY NEEDS.
409
00:10:17,116 --> 00:10:17,984
[ DOOR OPENS ]
>> Sheriff: I WANT TO THANK
410
00:10:18,918 --> 00:10:20,753
Y'ALL FOR YOUR HOSPITALITY AND
411
00:10:20,820 --> 00:10:21,587
PATIENCE.
412
00:10:21,654 --> 00:10:23,589
I-I KNOW I HADN'T BEEN MYSELF
413
00:10:23,656 --> 00:10:24,357
LATELY.
>> Rusty: AWW, THAT'S OKAY,
414
00:10:25,157 --> 00:10:26,025
SHERIFF.
415
00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:27,026
I KNOW BREAK-UPS ARE HARD.
416
00:10:27,126 --> 00:10:28,160
I BEEN THROUGH ONE RECENTLY
417
00:10:28,260 --> 00:10:29,095
MYSELF.
>> Sheriff: WHAT IS THIS?
418
00:10:29,762 --> 00:10:30,763
[ SMACKS LIPS ]
419
00:10:30,830 --> 00:10:31,430
HONEY?
>> Rusty: AFRAID SO.
420
00:10:32,331 --> 00:10:33,099
>> Granny: YOU KNOW WE'RE HERE
421
00:10:33,165 --> 00:10:35,101
FOR YOU, SHERIFF, BUT SOMETIMES,
422
00:10:35,167 --> 00:10:37,169
THE LITTLE BABY BIRD CAN'T FLY
423
00:10:37,269 --> 00:10:39,772
UNLESS IT'S PUSHED OUT OF THE
424
00:10:39,839 --> 00:10:40,439
NEST, YOU KNOW?
>> Early: HEADS UP.
425
00:10:41,107 --> 00:10:41,774
[ WHAP! ]
[ SIZZLE! ]
426
00:10:42,541 --> 00:10:43,209
>> Sheriff: FIRE ANTS?
OH, MY GOD! HELP ME! NO!
427
00:10:44,276 --> 00:10:45,011
FIRE ANTS!!
>> Granny: FLY, LITTLE BIRDY!
428
00:10:45,945 --> 00:10:46,679
FLY!
>> Early: PADLOCK IT!
429
00:10:47,613 --> 00:10:48,180
>> Sheriff: WHERE'S THE HOSE?!
>> Early: WHOO!
430
00:10:49,015 --> 00:10:50,950
I GOT MY MAN CAVE BACK!
431
00:10:51,017 --> 00:10:53,019
{\an8}[ COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYS ]
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