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1
00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:15,240
TRACY: Bye!
Don't forget her lunch!
2
00:00:15,280 --> 00:00:17,000
MAN: Yeah, I know, darling.
3
00:00:20,760 --> 00:00:22,720
(ALARM BEEPS)
4
00:00:32,040 --> 00:00:34,120
(ALARM BEEPS)
5
00:01:18,840 --> 00:01:21,640
- (ENGINE FAILS TO START)
- Come on.
6
00:01:29,680 --> 00:01:30,960
(KNOCK ON WINDOW)
7
00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:32,800
Dozy twat!
8
00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:37,480
- Sorry.
- (ENGINE CUTS OUT)
9
00:01:38,520 --> 00:01:40,200
- (ENGINE FAILS TO START)
- (HORNS BEEP)
10
00:01:40,240 --> 00:01:41,960
All right!
11
00:01:52,560 --> 00:01:54,920
So, doing anything fun tonight?
12
00:01:55,920 --> 00:01:59,760
Yes, actually. I thought I'd,
erm, go home three hours late,
13
00:01:59,800 --> 00:02:02,360
get shouted at
and fall asleep on the toilet.
14
00:02:03,520 --> 00:02:04,960
There should be some kind of
legal form
15
00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:07,000
that people have to sign before
they date doctors.
16
00:02:07,040 --> 00:02:09,320
- What, like sex offenders do?
- Yeah, exactly.
17
00:02:14,600 --> 00:02:16,080
Your girlfriend must be used to
18
00:02:16,120 --> 00:02:18,000
the late nights
by now, though, right?
19
00:02:18,040 --> 00:02:19,360
Fiancé, actually.
20
00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:20,440
Oh, congratulations!
21
00:02:20,480 --> 00:02:23,360
And it's F-I-N-A-N-C-E.
22
00:02:26,680 --> 00:02:27,760
"Finance"?
23
00:02:27,800 --> 00:02:31,240
No, I meant, erm, as in...
one E.
24
00:02:32,920 --> 00:02:34,600
The male version.
25
00:02:34,640 --> 00:02:35,920
I'm gay.
26
00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:38,280
Oh, shit. Oh, sorr...
27
00:02:38,320 --> 00:02:39,960
- Erm, I didn't...
- It's fine.
28
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:43,440
My alpha-male demeanour clearly
threw you off the scent.
29
00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:45,800
So, who proposed, then?
30
00:02:45,840 --> 00:02:47,720
We both sort of did, actually.
31
00:02:48,720 --> 00:02:50,280
In a graveyard. Obviously.
32
00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:53,680
We're actually
exchanging the rings tonight.
33
00:02:53,720 --> 00:02:55,280
That's lovely.
34
00:02:56,880 --> 00:02:58,920
Do you have a special someone
you apologise to?
35
00:02:58,960 --> 00:03:00,600
Oh, oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
36
00:03:00,640 --> 00:03:03,040
I'm actually in
a polyamorous
37
00:03:03,080 --> 00:03:05,000
three-way relationship right
now, so it's me,
38
00:03:05,040 --> 00:03:07,840
gynaecology textbooks and
a bucket of cheap chow mein.
39
00:03:07,880 --> 00:03:09,840
Right. How does the sex work
with the three of you?
40
00:03:09,880 --> 00:03:12,480
Hm! Sounds intriguing!
41
00:03:12,520 --> 00:03:15,360
Right, this complaint, then.
42
00:03:16,360 --> 00:03:18,920
I've just sent off
my statement,
43
00:03:18,960 --> 00:03:21,080
and when you do yours,
you're obviously going to say
44
00:03:21,120 --> 00:03:23,840
what happened
on the night in question.
45
00:03:23,880 --> 00:03:24,800
Yeah, of course.
46
00:03:26,160 --> 00:03:29,040
That you told us
to send the patient home.
47
00:03:29,080 --> 00:03:32,200
Yeah, but that was
before it was a complaint.
48
00:03:32,240 --> 00:03:33,600
Now I think we need to be
49
00:03:33,640 --> 00:03:36,200
a little more scrupulous
with the facts.
50
00:03:36,240 --> 00:03:40,000
Fuck! He's withdrawing
what he said. The bastard!
51
00:03:40,040 --> 00:03:42,360
He's withdrawing it
like a condomless cock
52
00:03:42,400 --> 00:03:44,400
and spraying it in our faces.
53
00:03:44,440 --> 00:03:46,240
You sent her home
without asking me.
54
00:03:46,280 --> 00:03:48,240
That's the truth,
and I strongly suggest
55
00:03:48,280 --> 00:03:50,320
that that's what you write
in your statements.
56
00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:52,400
Fudging the facts
can only make things
57
00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:53,800
worse in the long run.
58
00:03:53,840 --> 00:03:56,320
ADAM: Of course, Mr Lockhart.
59
00:03:56,360 --> 00:03:57,400
I've always wondered
60
00:03:57,440 --> 00:03:59,080
what the underneath
of a bus looks like.
61
00:03:59,120 --> 00:04:00,760
Well, off you go.
62
00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:08,280
Shut the door.
63
00:04:08,320 --> 00:04:10,560
SHRUTI: I thought you said
this wasn't a disaster.
64
00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:11,640
"This isn't a GMC thing.
65
00:04:11,680 --> 00:04:13,160
"We're not going to
get struck off."
66
00:04:13,200 --> 00:04:14,960
It's precisely a disaster.
67
00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:16,880
But can't we just write
the truth on our forms
68
00:04:16,920 --> 00:04:18,160
and sweat it out?
69
00:04:18,200 --> 00:04:19,680
Well, I would do that,
obviously,
70
00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:21,840
but I've already submitted
my statement.
71
00:04:21,880 --> 00:04:23,240
And you wrote...?
72
00:04:23,280 --> 00:04:24,760
That he told us
to send the patient home!
73
00:04:24,800 --> 00:04:26,240
I mean, what was I supposed
to say to him?
74
00:04:26,280 --> 00:04:28,600
"That's so kind to offer,
but, no, thanks."
75
00:04:32,880 --> 00:04:35,120
Listen, it's fine.
I'll handle it.
76
00:04:35,160 --> 00:04:37,000
How?
77
00:04:37,040 --> 00:04:38,600
I've got something. It's fine.
78
00:04:38,640 --> 00:04:39,880
You'd better.
79
00:04:41,320 --> 00:04:43,760
Got nothing. It's very un-fine.
80
00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:46,120
SHRUTI: Yes,
I'm still really enjoying it.
81
00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:47,560
Nine babies now.
82
00:04:48,560 --> 00:04:50,400
Yeah, they went really well.
83
00:04:51,400 --> 00:04:53,520
Yeah, their parents
all named them Shruti, so...
84
00:04:53,560 --> 00:04:55,680
No, Mum, that was a joke.
I was...
85
00:04:55,720 --> 00:04:58,000
I was obviously joking.
They don't really do that.
86
00:04:58,040 --> 00:05:00,160
No, I can't next week.
That's not how the rota works.
87
00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:01,760
Yeah, of course I'm eating.
88
00:05:03,560 --> 00:05:05,560
Oh, er, that's my bleep
going off.
89
00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:08,240
Yeah, I'd better get back.
90
00:05:09,320 --> 00:05:10,880
Uh-huh. Will do.
91
00:05:13,600 --> 00:05:15,360
(SPEAKS HINDI)
92
00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:18,840
OK.
93
00:05:18,880 --> 00:05:21,200
Yeah. Love to Dad.
94
00:05:23,640 --> 00:05:25,600
OK, bye. Bye.
95
00:05:40,960 --> 00:05:42,600
(TOILET FLUSHES)
96
00:05:52,680 --> 00:05:53,680
All right?
97
00:05:55,600 --> 00:05:56,720
Here.
98
00:05:56,760 --> 00:05:58,280
Use this.
99
00:05:58,320 --> 00:06:00,480
That stuff'll
sand your face off.
100
00:06:01,520 --> 00:06:02,600
Thank you.
101
00:06:29,080 --> 00:06:32,680
- Oh, thank God you're here.
- Go on.
102
00:06:32,720 --> 00:06:36,280
I have been totally abandoned.
I'm on my own here today.
103
00:06:36,320 --> 00:06:39,520
Tracy and Ria
have been sent off
104
00:06:39,560 --> 00:06:41,000
on some stupid course,
and we've got
105
00:06:41,040 --> 00:06:42,960
- triplets to deliver.
- Triplets?
106
00:06:43,000 --> 00:06:45,040
Exactly. Three times the chance
something'll go wrong.
107
00:06:45,080 --> 00:06:47,920
Triplets happen
one in every 6,500 pregnancies.
108
00:06:47,960 --> 00:06:49,480
Not often on a labour ward
do you get the chance
109
00:06:49,520 --> 00:06:51,600
to do something
you've never done before.
110
00:06:51,640 --> 00:06:52,640
Today of all days!
111
00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:54,320
- What are the odds?
- Go on, what are the odds?
112
00:06:54,360 --> 00:06:56,560
- Of triplets?
- Oh, erm, one in 4,000?
113
00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:57,600
Actually, that's wrong.
114
00:06:57,640 --> 00:06:59,040
Once you take IVF into account.
115
00:07:00,080 --> 00:07:02,320
All right, Stephen Dorking.
116
00:07:02,360 --> 00:07:04,160
Erm, who's the consultant
on today?
117
00:07:04,200 --> 00:07:05,720
Erm, I think it's Ms Houghton.
118
00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:07,080
I saw her in the toilet.
119
00:07:07,120 --> 00:07:08,640
Can I have a quick word?
120
00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:10,080
Yeah.
121
00:07:10,120 --> 00:07:12,600
No midwives, no ward clerk,
122
00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:14,720
and now the doctors
are leaving.
123
00:07:14,760 --> 00:07:16,320
OK, so, this statement thing,
right? It's easy.
124
00:07:16,360 --> 00:07:18,160
All you should do is just,
like, send in a new one.
125
00:07:18,200 --> 00:07:20,680
Yeah? Like, just say
you made a typo or something.
126
00:07:20,720 --> 00:07:22,360
Right. One of those typos where
127
00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:24,640
I accidentally falsified
my whole story.
128
00:07:24,680 --> 00:07:26,760
Well, you have to do something.
It's my career, too.
129
00:07:26,800 --> 00:07:29,320
Don't suppose there's anybody
fucking working here today,
130
00:07:29,360 --> 00:07:31,120
- is there?
- Sorry, Ms Houghton.
131
00:07:31,160 --> 00:07:33,120
- We were just, er...
- All right, you.
132
00:07:33,160 --> 00:07:34,800
I hope those shoes
have got steel toecaps.
133
00:07:34,840 --> 00:07:36,760
We're going to kick today
a whole new arsehole.
134
00:07:36,800 --> 00:07:39,440
- OK...
- Are you going to do something
135
00:07:39,480 --> 00:07:41,280
or just stand there like a
bottle of fucking mayonnaise?
136
00:07:43,600 --> 00:07:46,560
Why don't you get
a round of coffees in?
137
00:07:47,680 --> 00:07:49,880
Tell you what,
get yourself one, too.
138
00:08:15,800 --> 00:08:17,960
Sorry, darling.
The bus broke down.
139
00:08:18,000 --> 00:08:20,920
No problem, just grab
a name badge and find a seat.
140
00:08:24,440 --> 00:08:26,560
So, as I was saying,
geriatrics
141
00:08:26,600 --> 00:08:29,000
should now be referred to as...
142
00:08:29,040 --> 00:08:31,280
..."care of the older person".
143
00:08:31,320 --> 00:08:34,000
"Care of the older person"?
They make it sound like a spa.
144
00:08:34,040 --> 00:08:35,840
I don't know why they don't
just go the whole hog,
145
00:08:35,880 --> 00:08:37,240
call it
"care of the inevitable".
146
00:08:37,280 --> 00:08:39,480
I'm sure it used to be called
that three directives ago.
147
00:08:41,160 --> 00:08:43,080
Anything I can help you with,
ladies?
148
00:08:44,320 --> 00:08:48,920
Oh, we were just saying that
it's, erm, it's great that, er,
149
00:08:48,960 --> 00:08:51,480
older patients will no longer
be crippled
150
00:08:51,520 --> 00:08:53,680
- by old-fashioned language.
- We...
151
00:08:53,720 --> 00:08:56,640
We don't say "crippled".
152
00:08:57,960 --> 00:08:58,960
Apologies.
153
00:08:59,000 --> 00:09:00,160
You twat.
154
00:09:01,280 --> 00:09:05,440
Patients should now be
referred to as..."clients".
155
00:09:05,480 --> 00:09:07,080
That's because
the word "patient"
156
00:09:07,120 --> 00:09:09,520
actually stems from
the Latin "patiens", which....
157
00:09:09,560 --> 00:09:11,600
If they're clients,
then what are we?
158
00:09:11,640 --> 00:09:13,240
Prostitutes?
159
00:09:13,280 --> 00:09:15,200
Well, at least
if I was a prostitute,
160
00:09:15,240 --> 00:09:16,840
I wouldn't have to put up
with that prick.
161
00:09:16,880 --> 00:09:18,880
I wouldn't bet on it.
162
00:09:20,440 --> 00:09:23,560
(CLEARS HIS THROAT)
I'm just equipping you with
163
00:09:23,600 --> 00:09:25,360
the right language
to do your jobs properly.
164
00:09:27,640 --> 00:09:30,040
I'm sure my patients
will be thrilled.
165
00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:32,840
Clients.
166
00:09:32,880 --> 00:09:34,520
BOTH: Clients!
167
00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:43,120
Did you go to fucking Brazil
for those?
168
00:09:43,160 --> 00:09:45,120
Sorry, there was, erm,
169
00:09:45,160 --> 00:09:48,040
only one person
working at the coffee shop.
170
00:09:48,080 --> 00:09:50,200
"There was a lahlahlahlahlah."
171
00:09:51,240 --> 00:09:53,240
Keeping the change, or what?
172
00:09:56,480 --> 00:09:57,640
Yeah.
173
00:09:57,680 --> 00:09:59,840
Ms Houghton, I've been
thinking a lot about triplets.
174
00:09:59,880 --> 00:10:01,440
No-one wants to hear
about your wank bank.
175
00:10:01,480 --> 00:10:02,720
Very pithy.
176
00:10:02,760 --> 00:10:05,200
So, what I meant was, erm,
177
00:10:05,240 --> 00:10:06,840
with regard to
the forthcoming operative
178
00:10:06,880 --> 00:10:08,440
- delivery of the triplets...
- Oh!
179
00:10:08,480 --> 00:10:11,080
Such verisimilitude, Dr Kay.
180
00:10:11,120 --> 00:10:12,520
I don't know what it means.
181
00:10:12,560 --> 00:10:16,400
I just felt the need to
join in with the fancy words.
182
00:10:16,440 --> 00:10:17,720
Erm...
183
00:10:17,760 --> 00:10:20,800
...about the, er, triplets,
erm...
184
00:10:20,840 --> 00:10:24,880
...I wonder if you might allow
me to perhaps do the Caesarean.
185
00:10:26,160 --> 00:10:29,800
I've obviously done several
sets of twins, and, erm...
186
00:10:29,840 --> 00:10:31,320
...it would be
an incredible boost
187
00:10:31,360 --> 00:10:33,760
to my professional development
to have the opportunity
188
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:35,560
to, erm, to learn
your technique.
189
00:10:36,800 --> 00:10:39,040
What the fuck do you think
the technique is?
190
00:10:40,040 --> 00:10:41,160
You pull the babies out
191
00:10:41,200 --> 00:10:43,400
till there aren't any more
fucking babies to pull out.
192
00:10:44,680 --> 00:10:47,280
Right, shall we go
and meet the parents?
193
00:10:47,320 --> 00:10:50,440
Sorry,
"encounter the progenitors".
194
00:10:52,720 --> 00:10:55,280
I'd say this is going
very well.
195
00:11:01,200 --> 00:11:03,000
Hi! I'm Adam,
196
00:11:03,040 --> 00:11:06,120
one of the doctors, and this is
Ms Houghton, the consultant.
197
00:11:06,160 --> 00:11:07,600
This is nice, isn't it?
198
00:11:07,640 --> 00:11:10,360
It's like having a town crier.
199
00:11:10,400 --> 00:11:13,360
My name's Vicky. You are...?
200
00:11:13,400 --> 00:11:16,280
I'm Jasmine, and this is Dave.
201
00:11:16,320 --> 00:11:18,760
Lovely. I hear you've got
a little something for me.
202
00:11:18,800 --> 00:11:21,880
Oh, erm, yeah,
three little somethings.
203
00:11:21,920 --> 00:11:23,920
Three Little Birds.
Do you remember that one?
204
00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:27,760
Come on, you know it.
205
00:11:27,800 --> 00:11:29,080
# Three little birds
206
00:11:29,120 --> 00:11:31,120
# Pitched by my doorstep
207
00:11:31,160 --> 00:11:33,720
# Singing sweet songs
208
00:11:33,760 --> 00:11:35,880
# Of melodies pure and true
209
00:11:35,920 --> 00:11:41,200
# Saying, this is a message
to you-ou-ou... #
210
00:11:41,240 --> 00:11:42,920
(BOTH LAUGH AWKWARDLY)
211
00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:45,040
# ...Singing don't worry
212
00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:47,280
# 'Bout a thing
213
00:11:47,320 --> 00:11:48,880
# Cos... #
214
00:11:48,920 --> 00:11:50,600
Come on, you're up, guys.
215
00:11:52,040 --> 00:11:54,000
BOTH: # E...Every little thing
216
00:11:54,040 --> 00:11:56,080
# Is gonna be all right... #
217
00:11:56,120 --> 00:11:57,360
# Rise up this morning... #
218
00:12:03,000 --> 00:12:04,880
Yeah, I'm not going to lie,
we don't get triplets in here
219
00:12:04,920 --> 00:12:06,840
- every day!
- Thank goodness.
220
00:12:08,240 --> 00:12:10,120
Yeah, thank goodness.
Last thing we need's
221
00:12:10,160 --> 00:12:12,640
a world shortage
of bootees and bonnets!
222
00:12:12,680 --> 00:12:14,440
You're in safe hands.
223
00:12:14,480 --> 00:12:15,800
I mean,
224
00:12:15,840 --> 00:12:17,760
we've got three goes, so
225
00:12:17,800 --> 00:12:20,440
by the time the last one's out,
we'll be great at it, won't we?
226
00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:22,640
You got names sorted?
227
00:12:22,680 --> 00:12:25,880
Yeah. We reckon so.
228
00:12:25,920 --> 00:12:27,880
Milly, Billie and Lily.
229
00:12:27,920 --> 00:12:30,880
It's difficult finding
three names that rhyme.
230
00:12:31,920 --> 00:12:33,120
No comment.
231
00:12:34,880 --> 00:12:36,520
What time do you want
to get her round to theatre?
232
00:12:36,560 --> 00:12:38,320
Well, there's no time
like the present.
233
00:12:38,360 --> 00:12:40,480
Shall we see
if the theatre's ready?
234
00:12:42,160 --> 00:12:44,240
I think someone's toast's
burning.
235
00:12:44,280 --> 00:12:46,520
Probably just electing
a new Pope.
236
00:12:46,560 --> 00:12:48,760
Yeah, Pope Eggs Benedict XV!
237
00:12:48,800 --> 00:12:50,480
Pope Shepherd's Pius II.
238
00:12:50,520 --> 00:12:52,400
"Shepherd's Pius"!
239
00:12:53,920 --> 00:12:55,880
- Did you hear that?
- Yeah.
240
00:12:55,920 --> 00:12:58,720
TRACY: Sorry, can we get back
to the triplets?
241
00:12:58,760 --> 00:13:02,400
What, Huey, Dewey and Louie?
Bordering on child abuse.
242
00:13:02,440 --> 00:13:03,440
(ADAM CHUCKLES)
243
00:13:03,480 --> 00:13:05,800
Had one the other week
called Lasagne!
244
00:13:07,440 --> 00:13:08,880
Lasagne!
245
00:13:08,920 --> 00:13:10,520
Yeah, I'm sure the patients
246
00:13:10,560 --> 00:13:13,000
on the labour ward
apologised for not having
247
00:13:13,040 --> 00:13:14,560
your level of education,
Dr Kay.
248
00:13:14,600 --> 00:13:16,240
- Well, I didn't...
- Shruti,
249
00:13:16,280 --> 00:13:18,560
you're doing the triplets.
You,
250
00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:20,240
why don't you get yourself
down to A&E,
251
00:13:20,280 --> 00:13:22,960
see if you can clear
some of the backlog?
252
00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:25,720
There's a bloody good
bloody old chap.
253
00:13:57,640 --> 00:14:00,280
Hi, Erika. How are you doing?
254
00:14:00,320 --> 00:14:03,000
Oh, you know,
pomme ci, pomme ça.
255
00:14:03,040 --> 00:14:04,560
It's actually...
256
00:14:05,560 --> 00:14:06,560
Yeah.
257
00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:07,960
Can I ask you a question
about mist?
258
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:09,600
Erm, yes, I...guess.
259
00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:10,920
Well, he's got a lump
on the back of his head.
260
00:14:10,960 --> 00:14:12,040
Sorry, what...?
261
00:14:12,080 --> 00:14:14,360
Look, you can see
under his hat, look.
262
00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:15,520
He's got a lump
right at the back.
263
00:14:15,560 --> 00:14:17,160
Oh, I'm sorry.
264
00:14:17,200 --> 00:14:19,240
I didn't realise you'd... Mist.
265
00:14:20,720 --> 00:14:22,680
What a nice name.
266
00:14:23,760 --> 00:14:27,480
What's wrong with calling
a baby Steve once in a while?
267
00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:29,920
Does it have, erm,
a special meaning?
268
00:14:29,960 --> 00:14:31,680
Oh, yeah, yeah,
it does, actually.
269
00:14:31,720 --> 00:14:32,920
It's like a type of rain.
270
00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:37,040
Could you...have a look for me?
271
00:14:37,080 --> 00:14:39,640
Oh, that's not really
my speciality.
272
00:14:39,680 --> 00:14:42,400
Best to ask the baby doctors
when they come round.
273
00:14:42,440 --> 00:14:44,000
Yeah, but they haven't been
round yet this morning,
274
00:14:44,040 --> 00:14:45,920
and I tried to get someone
to come over,
275
00:14:45,960 --> 00:14:48,880
but no-one's coming over,
so I'm getting...
276
00:14:51,480 --> 00:14:53,080
Have a quick look.
277
00:14:54,160 --> 00:14:55,680
It's just under here.
278
00:14:56,720 --> 00:14:58,080
Can you see?
279
00:14:59,360 --> 00:15:03,920
OK, erm, that's called
an occipital protuberance.
280
00:15:03,960 --> 00:15:06,080
Oh, my God!
281
00:15:06,120 --> 00:15:07,440
Will... Will he be OK?
282
00:15:07,480 --> 00:15:09,440
Yeah. It's normal.
You've got one here.
283
00:15:11,280 --> 00:15:12,800
Oh, did he catch it from me?
284
00:15:13,840 --> 00:15:16,160
What, is his brain
going to be, like...all right?
285
00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:20,880
Erm, honestly, it's nothing
at all to worry about.
286
00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:22,200
Sorry.
287
00:15:22,240 --> 00:15:23,760
Thank you, Dr Adam.
288
00:15:24,880 --> 00:15:26,720
You're just the best!
289
00:15:27,800 --> 00:15:29,360
All part of the job. (CHUCKLES)
290
00:15:32,440 --> 00:15:35,000
I hope you don't mind
me asking, sorry,
291
00:15:35,040 --> 00:15:37,360
but why have you made
a complaint about me?
292
00:15:37,400 --> 00:15:38,920
Oh, no, no,
it's not about you.
293
00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:40,480
It's about the hospital.
294
00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:42,880
Right, it's just that it does
put quite a lot of pressure,
295
00:15:42,920 --> 00:15:44,720
you know, sort of stress on me.
296
00:15:44,760 --> 00:15:46,360
Oh. Erm...
297
00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:49,720
It's just my sister said
298
00:15:49,760 --> 00:15:51,480
we should get
something back after...
299
00:15:52,480 --> 00:15:53,920
...after what happened.
300
00:15:56,480 --> 00:15:57,480
Sure.
301
00:15:57,520 --> 00:15:58,800
OK. (LAUGHS NERVOUSLY)
302
00:16:00,040 --> 00:16:01,480
Don't judge me.
303
00:16:02,560 --> 00:16:04,520
Erika, sorry,
I don't m-m-mean to
304
00:16:04,560 --> 00:16:07,480
speak out of turn.
Erm, I'm just wondering if...
305
00:16:09,480 --> 00:16:12,120
...maybe the reason that
you haven't been able to see
306
00:16:12,160 --> 00:16:14,960
a baby doctor this morning is
because they're avoiding you,
307
00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:16,600
in case, you know,
308
00:16:16,640 --> 00:16:18,440
you complain about them, too.
309
00:16:18,480 --> 00:16:20,000
But they wouldn't do anything
310
00:16:20,040 --> 00:16:21,720
to put my baby
in danger, though.
311
00:16:21,760 --> 00:16:22,880
Erm...
312
00:16:22,920 --> 00:16:25,840
Listen, if I was
looking after him,
313
00:16:25,880 --> 00:16:28,960
it wouldn't affect my care
one bit. I just...
314
00:16:30,200 --> 00:16:32,600
I can't speak
for everyone here.
315
00:16:35,880 --> 00:16:37,480
But ignore me, because I...
316
00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:39,400
Yeah, I shouldn't have
said anything.
317
00:16:40,400 --> 00:16:42,240
What do you think I should do?
318
00:16:43,280 --> 00:16:46,400
Erm, I think you're
going to figure it out.
319
00:16:46,440 --> 00:16:47,720
You know, mums know best.
320
00:16:47,760 --> 00:16:50,520
And stay strong,
really, for Mist.
321
00:17:05,840 --> 00:17:07,680
(HUBBUB)
322
00:17:21,520 --> 00:17:23,760
We've been here
for about an hour!
323
00:17:31,640 --> 00:17:32,960
Come on, then.
324
00:17:35,960 --> 00:17:37,600
Here we go. OK?
325
00:17:57,240 --> 00:17:59,080
Big pull.
326
00:17:59,120 --> 00:18:00,280
There you are.
327
00:18:02,280 --> 00:18:03,400
Are you sure
you don't want to do it?
328
00:18:03,440 --> 00:18:05,560
Yeah, you're kind to offer,
mate, but what I actually want
329
00:18:05,600 --> 00:18:07,000
is 20 Rothmans Superkings,
330
00:18:07,040 --> 00:18:08,840
and at the moment you're
standing in the way of them.
331
00:18:08,880 --> 00:18:11,480
Right, bang a finger
in there, then. That's it.
332
00:18:12,560 --> 00:18:14,680
- OK, nearly there.
- OK.
333
00:18:14,720 --> 00:18:16,320
Just a few more seconds. Yeah.
334
00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:22,280
OK. The good news is, I can't
see any cause of the bleeding.
335
00:18:22,320 --> 00:18:24,280
And what are you doing
this evening?
336
00:18:24,320 --> 00:18:25,480
Funny you should ask.
337
00:18:25,520 --> 00:18:27,960
I'm going to this restaurant
that we really love.
338
00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:30,760
Oh, OK, great. Er, can you call
the New York office
339
00:18:30,800 --> 00:18:32,560
when they open and get someone
to overnight the documents?
340
00:18:32,600 --> 00:18:34,600
Uh-huh. Ooh, yeah,
341
00:18:34,640 --> 00:18:36,320
and make sure someone
from derivatives
342
00:18:36,360 --> 00:18:39,240
knows they're coming.
Fab. OK, thanks so much.
343
00:18:39,280 --> 00:18:40,720
MS HOUGHTON: Whoa!
344
00:18:40,760 --> 00:18:42,720
It's like the front row
at SeaWorld here.
345
00:18:42,760 --> 00:18:44,320
OK, see if you can grab a leg.
346
00:18:44,360 --> 00:18:45,880
(SUCTION)
347
00:18:47,240 --> 00:18:50,080
Um, I'm pretty sure
that's an arm.
348
00:18:50,120 --> 00:18:52,640
It's been a long time since
I've been at med school, but...
349
00:18:52,680 --> 00:18:55,120
Do you want to have another try
of the lucky dip there, Shruti?
350
00:18:55,160 --> 00:18:57,440
Got it. Beautiful!
351
00:18:58,480 --> 00:19:01,480
Right, yeah, I think I can see
what the problem is.
352
00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:11,880
Any idea how
he might have got in there?
353
00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:18,080
MS HOUGHTON:
First baby coming up.
354
00:19:18,120 --> 00:19:19,760
(BABY CRIES)
355
00:19:19,800 --> 00:19:22,720
Hooray!
356
00:19:23,760 --> 00:19:25,040
Look.
357
00:19:30,840 --> 00:19:32,280
OK.
358
00:19:37,080 --> 00:19:39,600
Stick or twist?
359
00:19:39,640 --> 00:19:41,800
All right.
Guys, she's going again.
360
00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:44,200
Erm, one question.
361
00:19:44,240 --> 00:19:46,360
Why have you got
a bottle in here?
362
00:19:46,400 --> 00:19:47,760
It's got my mum's piss in it.
363
00:19:48,960 --> 00:19:51,200
Forgive me for asking
a follow-up question...
364
00:19:51,240 --> 00:19:53,640
It's a drug test
for my probation officer.
365
00:19:55,040 --> 00:19:56,320
You're creating a lot of
paperwork for me here.
366
00:19:56,360 --> 00:19:59,640
How about...I fell on it?
367
00:19:59,680 --> 00:20:01,920
We have a winner.
368
00:20:09,440 --> 00:20:10,600
Oi, oi, oi. I need that.
369
00:20:10,640 --> 00:20:12,400
Give me my shit, man.
370
00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:18,400
(BABY CRIES)
371
00:20:18,440 --> 00:20:20,440
Two for the price of one.
Hooray!
372
00:20:23,720 --> 00:20:25,600
Hello, sweetheart.
373
00:20:30,600 --> 00:20:31,960
Right, what do you reckon,
are we going in
374
00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:33,160
- for number three?
- Mm-hm.
375
00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:35,200
You're doing great.
376
00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:37,080
Respect.
377
00:20:37,120 --> 00:20:38,880
Thanks for that.
378
00:20:38,920 --> 00:20:42,000
- Empathy.
- Lovely, Ian. Thanks.
379
00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:44,400
- Confidentiality?
- Terrific!
380
00:20:45,480 --> 00:20:48,000
- Erm, compassion.
- Great!
381
00:20:53,680 --> 00:20:55,120
Next time I'm pregnant
with triplets,
382
00:20:55,160 --> 00:20:56,520
I'm getting you to do them.
383
00:20:56,560 --> 00:20:57,600
Bang-up job there.
384
00:20:57,640 --> 00:20:58,640
Thank you.
385
00:20:58,680 --> 00:20:59,920
Oh, shit!
386
00:20:59,960 --> 00:21:01,440
What?
387
00:21:01,480 --> 00:21:03,680
I think you left
some scissors inside her.
388
00:21:04,720 --> 00:21:06,280
You'd better open her up again.
389
00:21:06,320 --> 00:21:09,640
Oh! Erm... OK.
I'm so sorry! I, erm...
390
00:21:09,680 --> 00:21:11,200
(MS HOUGHTON LAUGHS)
391
00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:12,840
Gotcha!
392
00:21:12,880 --> 00:21:14,560
Oh...
393
00:21:17,200 --> 00:21:19,400
(STILL LAUGHING)
394
00:21:22,840 --> 00:21:24,120
Ms Houghton, erm,
395
00:21:24,160 --> 00:21:26,400
I was wondering if you might
have a free moment for me
396
00:21:26,440 --> 00:21:28,040
to pick your brain about
something? About work, really.
397
00:21:28,080 --> 00:21:29,920
I can pop by your office
if you've got a free minute.
398
00:21:29,960 --> 00:21:33,160
Sounds awful. Here's a better
idea. How about we do it
399
00:21:33,200 --> 00:21:35,840
over a quattro stagioni
and a bottle of Jacob's Creek?
400
00:21:35,880 --> 00:21:37,280
Well, I wouldn't want to
take up too much of your time.
401
00:21:37,320 --> 00:21:39,320
Do I look like I eat slowly?
402
00:21:39,360 --> 00:21:40,640
Finish off the skin.
403
00:21:40,680 --> 00:21:42,840
I need to take
my lung medicine.
404
00:21:45,680 --> 00:21:48,000
(MAN CRIES OUT)
405
00:21:57,560 --> 00:21:59,240
Dr Kay?
406
00:21:59,280 --> 00:22:00,560
I was told you'd be down here.
407
00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:02,600
My sister's in bits, thinking
she's endangered her baby.
408
00:22:02,640 --> 00:22:04,080
Erm, I'm sorry,
I don't know what...
409
00:22:04,120 --> 00:22:05,240
How could you say that to her?
410
00:22:05,280 --> 00:22:06,560
You don't understand.
411
00:22:06,600 --> 00:22:10,240
I, er, I didn't say
that she had, erm...
412
00:22:11,600 --> 00:22:14,840
I, erm, had worked two shifts
back to back
413
00:22:14,880 --> 00:22:17,520
the day I delivered her,
I'd slept for three hours
414
00:22:17,560 --> 00:22:19,640
in two nights. There was all
this pressure at the hospital.
415
00:22:19,680 --> 00:22:23,040
I had to miss
my best friend's stag do.
416
00:22:23,080 --> 00:22:25,800
How dare you try
and make me feel bad!
417
00:22:25,840 --> 00:22:27,680
We're exercising
our legal rights.
418
00:22:27,720 --> 00:22:29,400
Your mistake
419
00:22:29,440 --> 00:22:31,760
had consequences
for my sister and my nephew.
420
00:22:31,800 --> 00:22:34,800
And that's going to have
consequences for you.
421
00:22:37,280 --> 00:22:39,400
OK, next one.
422
00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:43,320
"Suffers from." "Suffers from."
423
00:22:43,360 --> 00:22:45,080
What do we say instead?
424
00:22:46,840 --> 00:22:50,040
- "Lives with"?
- "Lives with," yeah.
425
00:22:50,080 --> 00:22:52,680
Thanks, Ian.
OK, next one. "Disabled."
426
00:22:52,720 --> 00:22:55,320
- "Differently abled."
- "Differently abled"!
427
00:22:55,360 --> 00:22:58,640
Well, the blue team
are on fire!
428
00:22:58,680 --> 00:23:01,640
Er, yeah, question
from the red team.
429
00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:02,840
Tracy?
430
00:23:02,880 --> 00:23:04,120
What's wrong
with saying "disabled"?
431
00:23:04,160 --> 00:23:07,240
Remember this morning?
We talked about inclusivity.
432
00:23:07,280 --> 00:23:09,000
This is what we call a...
433
00:23:09,040 --> 00:23:11,040
- "Negative."
- "Negative," yeah.
434
00:23:11,080 --> 00:23:12,400
Thanks, Ian. And we shouldn't
be using negatives.
435
00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:14,640
All that will happen is that
the patients won't understand
436
00:23:14,680 --> 00:23:15,880
what we're talking
to them about.
437
00:23:15,920 --> 00:23:16,760
Isn't it "clients"?
438
00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:18,760
Yeah, it is "clients",
actually.
439
00:23:18,800 --> 00:23:20,000
Erm,
440
00:23:20,040 --> 00:23:22,200
next one.
441
00:23:22,240 --> 00:23:24,200
"Birth defect."
442
00:23:24,240 --> 00:23:25,840
We haven't got
a working printer on our ward.
443
00:23:25,880 --> 00:23:29,800
We've had a leak in the
ceiling for over four years,
444
00:23:29,840 --> 00:23:31,720
and this is what they're
spending their money on?
445
00:23:31,760 --> 00:23:32,960
As your facilitator,
446
00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:36,680
it's my job to remind you of
the four pillars of the trust.
447
00:23:36,720 --> 00:23:38,640
- OK?
- (PAGER BEEPS)
448
00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:40,600
PAGER: ...crash call
to Accident & Emergency.
449
00:23:40,640 --> 00:23:42,280
That's obstetric team...
450
00:23:42,320 --> 00:23:43,840
(SIGHS)
451
00:23:44,920 --> 00:23:46,560
I should...
I should probably...
452
00:23:53,240 --> 00:23:54,400
(ALARM BLARES)
453
00:23:56,760 --> 00:23:59,640
Adam Kay, obstetrics.
Who's running the arrest?
454
00:23:59,680 --> 00:24:02,840
Kiran Chowdry, A&E.
That was quick. Good man.
455
00:24:02,880 --> 00:24:04,720
Came in feeling
short of breath. 37 weeks,
456
00:24:04,760 --> 00:24:06,360
first baby, collapsed
on her way to the cubicle.
457
00:24:06,400 --> 00:24:07,520
No respiratory effort,
458
00:24:07,560 --> 00:24:08,960
no pulse for three minutes now.
459
00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:10,800
I want to stay with my wife!
460
00:24:11,840 --> 00:24:13,200
Get me a scalpel.
461
00:24:13,240 --> 00:24:15,200
- Perimortem section.
- What, now? Here?
462
00:24:15,240 --> 00:24:17,120
You've had one cycle of CPR
with no output.
463
00:24:17,160 --> 00:24:18,480
- I'm delivering.
- You done this before?
464
00:24:18,520 --> 00:24:19,960
Yep.
465
00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:21,280
Well, I've delivered
babies before.
466
00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:22,600
(FATHER GASPS)
467
00:24:22,640 --> 00:24:24,560
- Scissors.
- Scissors.
468
00:24:24,600 --> 00:24:26,840
- I'm delivering.
- Off the chest.
469
00:24:31,280 --> 00:24:32,720
- Help me?
- Yep.
470
00:24:32,760 --> 00:24:35,040
This is a case of
nothing to lose.
471
00:24:35,080 --> 00:24:37,080
The patient is basically
already dead.
472
00:24:37,120 --> 00:24:40,480
The baby is pressing against
her major blood vessels.
473
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:42,480
This is our only chance
of resuscitating her.
474
00:24:42,520 --> 00:24:44,320
OK, pull.
475
00:24:44,360 --> 00:24:46,400
You'll notice
the slight lack of blood.
476
00:24:46,440 --> 00:24:48,920
Dead patients don't tend
to pump any blood around.
477
00:24:53,800 --> 00:24:55,680
Push.
478
00:24:58,760 --> 00:25:00,160
OK.
479
00:25:10,480 --> 00:25:12,040
Adam?
480
00:25:22,480 --> 00:25:24,440
(SOBS)
481
00:25:26,800 --> 00:25:28,560
- One...
- Keep pumping it.
482
00:25:28,600 --> 00:25:29,680
...two,
483
00:25:29,720 --> 00:25:31,120
three...
484
00:25:32,320 --> 00:25:34,040
...four, five...
485
00:25:38,640 --> 00:25:41,000
Heart rate is below 60.
486
00:25:41,040 --> 00:25:42,480
OK.
487
00:25:42,520 --> 00:25:43,560
- TRACY: Ready?
- PAEDIATRICIAN: Yeah.
488
00:25:43,600 --> 00:25:44,600
One, two, three.
489
00:25:44,640 --> 00:25:46,120
- One.
- One, two, three.
490
00:25:46,160 --> 00:25:48,560
- Two.
- One, two, three.
491
00:25:48,600 --> 00:25:50,320
- Three.
- One, two, three.
492
00:25:50,360 --> 00:25:52,720
- Four.
- One, two, three.
493
00:25:52,760 --> 00:25:54,000
Five.
494
00:25:54,040 --> 00:25:56,280
- (BABY CRIES)
- Yeah! Hello, darling!
495
00:25:56,320 --> 00:25:58,280
Hello, sweetheart!
496
00:25:59,400 --> 00:26:01,200
FATHER: You saved
the wrong one!
497
00:26:02,680 --> 00:26:05,440
You saved...
You saved the wrong one!
498
00:26:06,960 --> 00:26:08,400
Come on, love.
499
00:26:13,360 --> 00:26:15,360
DR CHOWDRY: OK, pull CPR.
500
00:26:15,400 --> 00:26:17,720
What about direct
cardiac massage?
501
00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:19,280
What? You mean open the chest?
502
00:26:19,320 --> 00:26:21,520
Do it through the diaphragm.
Come on!
503
00:26:21,560 --> 00:26:24,160
DR CHOWDRY:
OK, pause compressions.
504
00:26:25,240 --> 00:26:28,080
What's...What's happening?
505
00:26:35,600 --> 00:26:38,560
There's cardiac output.
Are you still massaging?
506
00:26:38,600 --> 00:26:40,840
No. She's doing that herself.
507
00:26:42,840 --> 00:26:43,960
Right.
508
00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:45,400
OK.
509
00:26:45,440 --> 00:26:47,120
Large swabs!
510
00:26:47,160 --> 00:26:50,400
Now, quickly! And we need
to get her into theatre.
511
00:26:50,440 --> 00:26:52,800
Hold this tight until
the second she's in theatre.
512
00:26:52,840 --> 00:26:54,800
Right, let's get her
onto a trolley. Come on.
513
00:26:54,840 --> 00:26:55,920
Fucking hell, mate.
514
00:26:55,960 --> 00:26:57,800
Right, come on,
let's get a wiggle on.
515
00:26:57,840 --> 00:26:59,120
NURSE: Ready?
516
00:26:59,160 --> 00:27:00,640
One, two, three.
517
00:27:00,680 --> 00:27:01,680
Lift!
518
00:27:01,720 --> 00:27:04,480
Do you want to close up
or just have a massive brandy?
519
00:27:04,520 --> 00:27:06,440
Er, do you mind doing it?
520
00:27:06,480 --> 00:27:09,400
That's proper obstetrics there.
You did amazing.
521
00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:13,120
"Ly."
522
00:27:13,160 --> 00:27:14,880
"You did amazingly."
523
00:27:18,800 --> 00:27:19,880
FATHER: Thank you.
524
00:27:19,920 --> 00:27:21,280
Thank you! Thank you!
525
00:27:26,760 --> 00:27:31,080
Thank you, thank you! Thank
you! Thank you! Thank you!
526
00:27:33,680 --> 00:27:35,240
Theatre two - ready now.
527
00:27:41,520 --> 00:27:44,560
Er, Dr Kay? Can I have a word?
528
00:28:08,280 --> 00:28:10,400
(SIGHS)
529
00:28:12,080 --> 00:28:14,720
Some of us
have been delivering triplets.
530
00:28:14,760 --> 00:28:16,800
How was it?
531
00:28:16,840 --> 00:28:20,880
Yeah, it was great. I can't
believe I actually managed it.
532
00:28:20,920 --> 00:28:23,160
Mm. We were all quite shocked.
533
00:28:23,200 --> 00:28:25,080
How was A&E?
534
00:28:26,080 --> 00:28:28,040
Yeah, you know, the usual crap.
535
00:28:28,080 --> 00:28:30,000
Had a bit of good news, though.
536
00:28:30,040 --> 00:28:33,320
You're finally going on that
communication skills course?
537
00:28:33,360 --> 00:28:35,760
Um, Erika dropped
the complaint.
538
00:28:36,800 --> 00:28:38,440
Oh, my God!
539
00:28:38,480 --> 00:28:40,800
Are you serious? How the hell
did you manage that?
540
00:28:40,840 --> 00:28:43,160
You don't want to know
how the sausage gets made.
541
00:28:43,200 --> 00:28:45,640
But you can sleep easy tonight.
542
00:28:45,680 --> 00:28:48,520
Sleep? No, I'll revise easy.
543
00:28:48,560 --> 00:28:52,760
Oh, Adam, I'm really worried
about the lady in Room Five.
544
00:28:52,800 --> 00:28:55,480
- Would you mind taking a look?
- I'm leaving now.
545
00:28:56,680 --> 00:28:59,360
I don't think I've ever
said those words before.
546
00:28:59,400 --> 00:29:02,320
Shruti's more than capable
of looking after your patient.
547
00:29:03,320 --> 00:29:05,880
I've definitely never
said those words before.
548
00:29:28,400 --> 00:29:31,960
Jesus! I was expecting to
wait here two hours.
549
00:29:34,160 --> 00:29:38,240
Don't worry. This is just a
hologram. Adam's still at work.
550
00:29:38,280 --> 00:29:40,000
Knew it.
551
00:29:41,000 --> 00:29:42,360
OK...
552
00:29:45,920 --> 00:29:47,160
Hm!
553
00:29:51,240 --> 00:29:52,320
Very good.
554
00:29:57,040 --> 00:29:58,120
How was work?
555
00:29:58,160 --> 00:29:59,760
It was fi...
556
00:30:02,280 --> 00:30:03,400
You know what?
It was brilliant.
557
00:30:03,440 --> 00:30:06,880
This pregnant woman collapsed
straight in front of me in A&E,
558
00:30:06,920 --> 00:30:09,560
so I took a scalpel and, erm...
559
00:30:09,600 --> 00:30:11,400
How much gory detail
do you want?
560
00:30:11,440 --> 00:30:14,880
All of it. Unless it's going to
put me off my dinner.
561
00:30:14,920 --> 00:30:17,080
You know, the weird thing
about being a doctor
562
00:30:17,120 --> 00:30:21,200
is that everyone thinks
you're always saving lives.
563
00:30:21,240 --> 00:30:25,120
But, actually, it's pretty rare
to be able to say that today,
564
00:30:25,160 --> 00:30:26,800
- I literally...
- (PHONE CHIMES)
565
00:30:26,840 --> 00:30:28,160
Oh!
566
00:30:30,920 --> 00:30:32,560
(CHUCKLES) PJ and Kenzie.
567
00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:34,680
They're going out later.
568
00:30:34,720 --> 00:30:35,920
PJ and Kenzie?
569
00:30:35,960 --> 00:30:37,960
Didn't they get knocked out
at Judges' Houses?
570
00:30:38,000 --> 00:30:39,520
You've met them.
571
00:30:39,560 --> 00:30:42,240
PJ's 21st - on the roof of...
572
00:30:42,280 --> 00:30:43,520
Oh, no, you were working,
573
00:30:43,560 --> 00:30:45,560
- weren't you? You know Ian?
- Yes, I do.
574
00:30:45,600 --> 00:30:47,200
He looks a bit like Ian.
575
00:30:47,240 --> 00:30:49,200
Can I get you an aperitif
to kick things off?
576
00:30:49,240 --> 00:30:52,120
Mm, I'll have a champagne,
please. Non-vintage.
577
00:30:52,160 --> 00:30:54,280
And I'll have a Foster's.
Vintage.
578
00:31:00,680 --> 00:31:02,040
Oh!
579
00:31:04,600 --> 00:31:06,560
Guess, er,
guess what's in here?
580
00:31:06,600 --> 00:31:08,000
Oh, I love this game.
581
00:31:08,040 --> 00:31:10,600
Is it the bullet that killed
Tupac Shakur?
582
00:31:10,640 --> 00:31:13,040
No, no, the complete works
of Shakespeare
583
00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:16,000
written on a grain of rice.
A butt plug for a cat?
584
00:31:27,200 --> 00:31:29,160
(EXHALES)
585
00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:33,640
It's beautiful.
586
00:31:41,360 --> 00:31:42,840
The cat's going to love it.
587
00:31:56,960 --> 00:31:58,560
You know what it is?
588
00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:03,680
It's, erm...
589
00:32:04,960 --> 00:32:06,040
An engagement ring?
590
00:32:06,080 --> 00:32:07,880
So, you remember
our first weekend away?
591
00:32:07,920 --> 00:32:09,280
At the Giant's Causeway?
592
00:32:09,320 --> 00:32:11,000
This was the penny
593
00:32:11,040 --> 00:32:13,360
you put in the machine
that squidged it down.
594
00:32:13,400 --> 00:32:16,040
And I, erm...
I made it into a ring.
595
00:32:20,200 --> 00:32:21,440
Well, don't just stare at it.
596
00:32:21,480 --> 00:32:22,840
Put it on.
597
00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:28,280
I hope you like it.
598
00:32:28,320 --> 00:32:30,800
You're kind of wearing it
for ever now, so...
599
00:32:34,600 --> 00:32:35,960
I love it.
600
00:32:36,000 --> 00:32:38,760
Good, cos God knows how
I turn it back into a penny.
601
00:32:42,480 --> 00:32:43,840
(EXHALES)
602
00:32:46,240 --> 00:32:48,360
Right, so,
where are we going to
603
00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:50,280
have the engagement party,
then?
604
00:32:51,280 --> 00:32:53,680
Er, we could have
a little, erm...
605
00:32:54,680 --> 00:32:57,080
...dinner party
at our, er, our flat.
606
00:32:58,200 --> 00:33:00,320
Yeah, we could totally do that.
607
00:33:00,360 --> 00:33:02,160
Or we could do something fun.
608
00:33:02,200 --> 00:33:04,400
- (PHONE CHIMES)
- Sure.
609
00:33:04,440 --> 00:33:07,560
Oh, PJ and Kenzie are asking
if we want to go to Squirt.
610
00:33:07,600 --> 00:33:10,440
- Not for the engagement party?
- After dinner.
611
00:33:10,480 --> 00:33:12,640
- Oh!
- What do you reckon?
612
00:33:12,680 --> 00:33:14,080
Sure.
613
00:33:14,120 --> 00:33:15,480
Although we should ask
if they do functions.
614
00:33:15,520 --> 00:33:18,560
How does your mum feel
about harnesses?
615
00:33:22,440 --> 00:33:24,600
MS HOUGHTON:
So, we're all standing there,
616
00:33:24,640 --> 00:33:27,640
staring at this X-ray
of an 80-year-old woman,
617
00:33:27,680 --> 00:33:28,720
wondering why she's got a load
618
00:33:28,760 --> 00:33:30,440
of tiny little bones
inside her.
619
00:33:30,480 --> 00:33:31,960
I said, "All right,
620
00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:33,840
"get her in the stirrups,"
621
00:33:33,880 --> 00:33:35,480
had a rummage around.
622
00:33:35,520 --> 00:33:38,960
Turns out she's got half a box
of KFC shoved up there.
623
00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:41,920
Oh, my God!
624
00:33:43,640 --> 00:33:45,680
- Wow!
- Do you want some more wine?
625
00:33:45,720 --> 00:33:47,960
Oh, just a little bit.
Thank you.
626
00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:50,280
That's... That's fine,
thank you.
627
00:33:51,640 --> 00:33:53,080
Top-up.
628
00:33:56,560 --> 00:33:59,840
Erm, this is so kind
of you, seriously.
629
00:33:59,880 --> 00:34:01,880
Honestly, it means so much
to have a consultant
630
00:34:01,920 --> 00:34:03,560
just, like, give me some time.
631
00:34:03,600 --> 00:34:06,000
Ah, we've got to stick
together, don't we, mate?
632
00:34:06,040 --> 00:34:08,520
I mean, yeah, I mean,
I honestly thought
633
00:34:08,560 --> 00:34:11,240
I was, like, the only doctor
in the country who wasn't
634
00:34:11,280 --> 00:34:13,920
the captain of a quidditch team
at some poncey private school.
635
00:34:13,960 --> 00:34:15,760
Full disclosure, mate.
636
00:34:15,800 --> 00:34:17,800
My dad's the Duke of Bedford.
637
00:34:18,840 --> 00:34:20,200
Oh, my God.
638
00:34:20,240 --> 00:34:22,040
Oh, my God, I'm so sorry.
639
00:34:22,080 --> 00:34:24,000
I-I didn't mean to offend you.
I was just...
640
00:34:25,440 --> 00:34:26,960
He played darts
in the Duke of Bedford.
641
00:34:27,000 --> 00:34:28,480
Oh!
642
00:34:29,520 --> 00:34:31,440
So, what did you want
to talk to me about?
643
00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:34,880
Erm, oh, OK. Erm...
644
00:34:36,000 --> 00:34:37,440
Well, er...
645
00:34:38,440 --> 00:34:39,760
Er, well, you know
646
00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:41,640
- that Caesarean today?
- Yeah.
647
00:34:41,680 --> 00:34:42,760
It felt like the first time
648
00:34:42,800 --> 00:34:44,360
I'd actually done
something right at work.
649
00:34:44,400 --> 00:34:45,400
Huh!
650
00:34:45,440 --> 00:34:47,640
I just feel
so incompetent there.
651
00:34:47,680 --> 00:34:48,920
The whole time, you know?
652
00:34:48,960 --> 00:34:51,520
Like a total fraud.
653
00:34:51,560 --> 00:34:53,160
And I'm lying to my parents,
654
00:34:53,200 --> 00:34:55,960
because they are so proud of
what they think I've achieved.
655
00:34:56,960 --> 00:34:59,040
So much of the job
is just so...
656
00:35:00,440 --> 00:35:02,360
Oh, it's just no-one tells you
how upsetting it is.
657
00:35:02,400 --> 00:35:03,680
Do you know what I mean?
658
00:35:03,720 --> 00:35:05,200
I feel like
I'm the first doctor
659
00:35:05,240 --> 00:35:06,480
to have cried in the toilet.
660
00:35:06,520 --> 00:35:09,760
And, you know, like,
patients almost bleed to death,
661
00:35:09,800 --> 00:35:11,560
and babies get sick, and...
662
00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:13,880
...a husband
basically assaulted me.
663
00:35:13,920 --> 00:35:16,520
And everyone else
is, like, "Fine, yeah,
664
00:35:16,560 --> 00:35:18,400
"this is just the job."
665
00:35:18,440 --> 00:35:20,080
It's not fine!
666
00:35:21,080 --> 00:35:22,560
Is it?
667
00:35:23,760 --> 00:35:25,680
And where's the support?
668
00:35:27,400 --> 00:35:28,960
And even if there was any,
I wouldn't have time,
669
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:32,040
because I'm working 14 hours
a day and then revising
670
00:35:32,080 --> 00:35:36,080
in between for God knows how
many more. I just feel so...
671
00:35:38,080 --> 00:35:39,960
...so constantly overwhelmed.
672
00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:41,360
Like you're permanently
fighting fires
673
00:35:41,400 --> 00:35:42,480
and you haven't got
the right kit.
674
00:35:44,280 --> 00:35:45,440
Yeah!
675
00:35:45,480 --> 00:35:47,720
Yeah, that is exactly it.
676
00:35:48,760 --> 00:35:50,880
Are you sure
you're in the right job?
677
00:35:50,920 --> 00:35:52,920
What do you mean?
678
00:35:52,960 --> 00:35:54,480
Well, it's a difficult job.
679
00:35:54,520 --> 00:35:56,840
What do you want me to say?
"It gets easier"? It doesn't.
680
00:35:57,840 --> 00:35:59,800
By the time you retire,
there's going to be a bus load
681
00:35:59,840 --> 00:36:02,200
of dead babies
with your name on it.
682
00:36:02,240 --> 00:36:04,960
If you can't handle that fact,
maybe you should get out now.
683
00:36:05,000 --> 00:36:08,080
Well, no-one's making you
be here, are they?
684
00:36:08,120 --> 00:36:10,760
That's just you and
some fucked-up fantasy
685
00:36:10,800 --> 00:36:13,720
you've got about what
your parents will think.
686
00:36:13,760 --> 00:36:16,680
You need to decide, number one,
687
00:36:16,720 --> 00:36:19,400
do you really want
to be doing this,
688
00:36:19,440 --> 00:36:21,920
and, more importantly,
number two,
689
00:36:21,960 --> 00:36:23,120
are we going to get
690
00:36:23,160 --> 00:36:25,440
another glass of limoncello in,
or what?
691
00:36:29,960 --> 00:36:31,400
Yeah, sure.
692
00:36:34,960 --> 00:36:36,920
(MUSIC POUNDS)
693
00:36:39,160 --> 00:36:40,440
(LAUGHTER)
694
00:36:44,120 --> 00:36:46,040
Hey, there's a queue here,
ladies.
695
00:36:46,080 --> 00:36:47,640
Harry Muir plus one.
696
00:36:48,720 --> 00:36:49,760
I can't see it here, love.
697
00:36:49,800 --> 00:36:53,840
Oh, well, we tried.
Have a...lovely evening.
698
00:36:53,880 --> 00:36:55,200
All right, Grandad.
699
00:36:55,240 --> 00:36:56,640
Erm, it could be under Kenzie.
700
00:36:56,680 --> 00:36:58,920
(SIGHS) Hang on, let me look.
701
00:36:58,960 --> 00:37:00,600
We don't want to put you out.
It doesn't matter.
702
00:37:00,640 --> 00:37:02,160
Come on!
703
00:37:02,200 --> 00:37:04,000
What the point of being engaged
if we can't brag about it?
704
00:37:04,040 --> 00:37:05,360
Er, or PJ, maybe.
705
00:37:06,680 --> 00:37:08,400
Oh, here y'are. Go on, get in.
706
00:37:13,280 --> 00:37:14,800
Thanks a bunch.
Now I have to go in here.
707
00:37:14,840 --> 00:37:16,840
Well, he seems fun, love.
708
00:37:35,280 --> 00:37:36,520
Hey, cut it out.
709
00:37:40,320 --> 00:37:42,080
Erm, excuse me?
710
00:37:42,120 --> 00:37:44,120
Hey!
711
00:37:44,160 --> 00:37:45,720
Hello?
712
00:37:45,760 --> 00:37:47,920
Honey? Two, please.
713
00:37:49,200 --> 00:37:50,200
Thanks.
714
00:37:51,600 --> 00:37:54,520
Oh, my God, you must be
the famous Adam.
715
00:37:54,560 --> 00:37:56,520
I've heard so much about you.
716
00:37:56,560 --> 00:37:57,720
I'm PJ.
717
00:37:57,760 --> 00:37:59,560
It doesn't ring a bell.
718
00:38:03,960 --> 00:38:07,440
No. Goodness, no.
I thought it was a mint.
719
00:38:07,480 --> 00:38:11,000
I can't. I'd get struck off.
I'm a doctor.
720
00:38:11,040 --> 00:38:13,120
Yeah. I heard.
721
00:38:13,160 --> 00:38:14,240
- Shot?
- I don't do those
722
00:38:14,280 --> 00:38:16,400
- either, I'm...
- Oh, my God, come on.
723
00:38:16,440 --> 00:38:18,000
Everyone's doing them.
724
00:38:18,040 --> 00:38:19,480
Yeah, I don't generally
do things
725
00:38:19,520 --> 00:38:22,160
just because
everyone does them.
726
00:38:22,200 --> 00:38:24,000
I only asked if you wanted
to do a shot,
727
00:38:24,040 --> 00:38:25,840
not commit mass murder.
728
00:38:25,880 --> 00:38:27,800
Oh, I'd do that.
729
00:38:32,040 --> 00:38:33,520
Who's that over there?
730
00:38:33,560 --> 00:38:35,240
That one there.
731
00:38:35,280 --> 00:38:38,400
The really hot one
dancing with Harry?
732
00:38:40,960 --> 00:38:42,640
That's Kenzie.
733
00:38:46,280 --> 00:38:49,200
That's Kenzie.
Erm, you know what?
734
00:38:49,240 --> 00:38:50,760
I will have
a couple of shots.
735
00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:52,360
I only offered you one.
736
00:38:52,400 --> 00:38:53,600
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
737
00:38:55,400 --> 00:38:57,880
OK, come on,
let's go join them.
738
00:38:57,920 --> 00:38:59,720
- I don't.... I'm fine.
- What's it going to take?!
739
00:38:59,760 --> 00:39:01,720
Some kind of
major cerebral event.
740
00:39:01,760 --> 00:39:03,360
Jesus, come on!
741
00:39:03,400 --> 00:39:05,880
- Please...
- Come on!
742
00:39:06,960 --> 00:39:08,960
Guys? This is Adam.
743
00:39:14,080 --> 00:39:16,560
I can see why you've kept him
hidden away.
744
00:39:38,240 --> 00:39:40,360
(MUSIC CONTINUES)
745
00:39:50,760 --> 00:39:52,080
Breath of fresh air, love?
746
00:39:52,120 --> 00:39:53,440
Yeah.
747
00:39:53,480 --> 00:39:57,680
I wasn't really into the cheap
cologne and aerosolised semen.
748
00:39:57,720 --> 00:40:00,440
I know what'll cheer you up.
Why don't you buy me a drink?
749
00:40:01,680 --> 00:40:02,800
I'm with someone.
750
00:40:02,840 --> 00:40:04,800
Well, that's nice.
Has he got your wallet?
751
00:40:04,840 --> 00:40:07,600
- Can you just leave me alone?
- Gladly.
752
00:40:09,240 --> 00:40:10,400
You know what, love?
753
00:40:10,440 --> 00:40:12,680
If you go round life
hating everyone you meet,
754
00:40:12,720 --> 00:40:14,520
maybe you hate yourself.
755
00:40:20,320 --> 00:40:23,240
You not coming back in
for another dance?
756
00:40:23,280 --> 00:40:24,360
Well, honestly, I would
757
00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:26,680
if the music was less shit
and I was less boring.
758
00:40:26,720 --> 00:40:28,640
Boring? You're not boring.
759
00:40:28,680 --> 00:40:30,080
Everyone's been
raving about you.
760
00:40:30,120 --> 00:40:31,520
Well...
761
00:40:31,560 --> 00:40:34,280
...not raving, but PJ was...
762
00:40:34,320 --> 00:40:35,400
...definitely positive.
763
00:40:35,440 --> 00:40:37,360
Overall.
764
00:40:40,240 --> 00:40:42,440
You're all I talk about
to them, you know?
765
00:40:46,280 --> 00:40:49,000
- Shall we escape?
- We can have a...
766
00:40:49,040 --> 00:40:51,520
...little dance.
767
00:40:51,560 --> 00:40:53,400
I thought you said
you didn't like the music.
768
00:40:53,440 --> 00:40:54,960
Not in there.
769
00:40:56,920 --> 00:40:57,920
What?
770
00:40:57,960 --> 00:40:59,720
I've got some moves.
771
00:41:04,320 --> 00:41:07,520
No, no, don't worry, we'll
fix that before the wedding.
51867
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