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[ radio static ]
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♪ [ country music plays ] ♪
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♪ I gave all my best years
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To that woman ♪
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♪ all she gave me
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Was mouths to feed ♪
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♪ miracles straight from
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The loins of jesus ♪
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♪ since charlie blew off
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Both my testes ♪
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♪ 1969 cam ranh bay ♪
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>> rusty: my turn!
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>> early: hell naw.
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>> let me drive that thing!
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>> do not touch the trim!
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>> [ snoring ]
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Oh, sumbitch.
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>> alright, bar's closed!
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>> you heard the man,
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You ain't gotta go home
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But you can't--
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[ snoring ]
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>> actually, early I'm...
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>> huh!?
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>> ...Talking to you.
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>> aw, come on now!
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The night is young!
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>> the night is gone.
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>> well, I guess I'll call it
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A night.
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Just let me get me three of them
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Frozen mojitos in the kenny
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Chesney collector boots.
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For the road.
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Zoom, zoom!
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[ snoring ]
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>> we don't do to go orders.
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>> alright!
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Then I'll have 'em here!
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I'm just pulling
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Your pud, ellis.
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I got to get on to work.
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Uh, how bout just having
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Somebody drop off them
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Chesney boots to me up at my
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Office place?
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[ snoring ]
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>> sheriff: uh, hey early.
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>> huh? Huh!? What you say!?
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>> you uh, got a ride home
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Ain't ya?
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>> you bet your ass I do.
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I got the need for speed!
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And dickie sells that
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Two counties over so I got
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To get on the road here.
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>> uh, sorry son, but you
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Ain't about to take that truck
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Outta here.
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>> yea, you right, you right.
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I'll take the boat!
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>> early...
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>> now who wins?
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>> early, come on now.
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>> fine, I get it.
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I got a problem.
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Lookie here, jingle jangle!
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>> early, come on. Quit it.
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You know I go that issue
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With my arches.
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>> yo!
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Get the hell out of the way!
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Get the hell out of the way!
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>> we got a 10-51
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Outside the jiggle hut.
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[ crash ]
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Scratch that --
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Inside the jiggle hut.
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>> they hit me.
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>> officer in pursuit.
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>> fat bitch.
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>> uh, so you see, while rage
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May be momentarily satisfying,
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It is not necessarily the answer
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To every problem.
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>> it helped out o.J. Make
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His wife stop cheating on him.
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>> yeah, rage did kinda
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Pretty much work out in that
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One instance there.
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>> what about dui,
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Attempted vehicular homicide,
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Destruction of property?
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>> calm down ellis, you're
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Gonna have to deal with your
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Anger, too, here sport.
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>> I got hit by a truck
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Inside my own bar!
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He should be in jail!
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And what's this guy doing here?
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He's not angry, he's a freak.
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>> now I told y'all,
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Everybody's gonna be here
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In anger management until
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We finish the jail renovation.
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>> that why the sales tax
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Got jacked up?
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To renovate the jail?
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For that son of a bitch?
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>> well, he did made some
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Requests, and we are at the
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Service of our constituents,
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Ya know.
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>> I told you now, I'll start
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Breakin' the law over there in
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Colquitt county where they got
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The tivo and pillow top
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Mattresses.
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>> he should be in jail!
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>> I'm about to catch up on
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My mad men!
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>> alright everybody just
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Calm down, now.
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And let's get on track here.
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I want everybody here to look
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Over at your hug buddy.
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Look him right in the eye...
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Well shoot let's see we've got
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Uneven numbers here.
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Early, so uh, you're gonna have
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To work with the cpr doll.
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>> ohhhh.
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>> early?
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>> we working.
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Yeah, we working just fine!
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>> I don't give a damn
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If it was a doll, early.
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No means no!
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>> it wasn't nothing but
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A back rub.
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>> back rubs happen on the
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Outside.
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With hands.
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>> you got to pick
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Everything apart.
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I'm out here busting my hump,
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Trying to give back to those
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Who helped me.
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>> yeah you're giving back,
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But don't forget you're also
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Doing the community service
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Hours you were sentenced to.
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>> the point is I'm reinvesting
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In the community.
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>> okay, that is true.
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But to be fair, early --
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>> selfless acts for the good
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Of all.
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>> well let's just be clear
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Now, you're also giving back
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Because you were told to
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By a court of law.
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>> don't lord it over me.
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>> alright.
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>> I'm sitting here paying
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It forward and you wanna light
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A damn fire?
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>> where'd you get them shoes?
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>> they mine from home.
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>> wingtips, huh?
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>> you bet.
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>> brand new too.
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Hmm.
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>> hell, I'm gonna put my best
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Foot forward while I'm serving
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The community by my own choice.
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[ muffled screams ]
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>> uh, where's your trash bag,
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Early?
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>> I filled it up.
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Aww, come on!
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Ain't no damn way you counted
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To 400 yet!!
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>> this damn jail can't hold
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Me baby!
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>> well --
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>> no jail can hold my ass!
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>> fernando and the boys,
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They needed a couple of weeks
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More so it looks like I'm gonna
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Have to release you.
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>> I get rid of this here
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Scaffold.
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Put a flat screen here.
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Open up the whole room.
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>> but I'm going to tell you
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This right now.
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If you so much as raise
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A finger to anybody in this
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Community, I'm gonna have to
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Bring you right back over here
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And release you all over again.
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Are we clear on that?
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>> krystal.
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>> alright.
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Mighty fine.
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>> krystal?
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Ain't that the name of his
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Ex wife?
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>> early, no!
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>> me and you's about to
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Have words, little gal!
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[ grunting ]
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[ sirens ]
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>> stop in the name of the law!
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>> no! My baby bride!
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She was so young!
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So fine!
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What in the hell have I done?
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>> what the hell you done do
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To my decoy?
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>> oh krystal, you're alive!
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>> oh, I use that to retain
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My squatters rights while I go
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Down to get my milkshake on.
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>> if I can't have you,
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Nobody will!
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Get down here! Get!
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>> hey, nuh uh!
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>> early!
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It's time to make a change.
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>> I know better.
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That ain't all.
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>> this here's a outrage!
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>> come on.
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Keep a piling.
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>> who watches the watchmen?!
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>> really?
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A grenade launcher, huh?
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>> self defense.
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>> I'm not afraid to do
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This, now.
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>> no!
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It's my 19th amendment right!
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That's where that went.
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>> where is that damn scope?
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>> damn, you take all the guns,
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All the criminals will
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Have guns.
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>> there it is.
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>> ow, put that back.
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I'm using that to prop up
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My face.
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>> sorry.
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>> the hat too, early.
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>> whoa now!
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This hat is licensed and
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Registered with the state!
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>> then why'd you mark off
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That serial number?
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>> aw damn it!
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>> no!
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My anger is destroying both me
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And charlie daniels, both!
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Oh!
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>> it's time to get on
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With the healing now, early.
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>> whoa, what happened here?
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>> get out.
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>> that don't surprise me
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With all the damn beers
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And alcohol you serve.
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>> get out.
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>> stay on message, early.
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>> nevermind.
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Iced tea for me, barkeep.
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>> get out!
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>> look, ellis, I'm sorry
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For what I done.
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You are a victim.
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And in a way, we all victims...
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Of your tendency
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To over-serve me.
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>> get out!
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>> but it's alright,
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I forgive you.
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Hey, let's celebrate.
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Reckon there's any alcohol
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In these bar mats?
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>> early!
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>> give me a second I'll get
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00:07:31,013 --> 00:07:32,011
Some out.
293
00:07:32,013 --> 00:07:33,011
>> get out!
294
00:07:33,013 --> 00:07:34,019
>> uh, let's go, early.
295
00:07:34,021 --> 00:07:36,004
Healing takes time.
296
00:07:36,006 --> 00:07:37,015
>> time won't heal my spine.
297
00:07:37,017 --> 00:07:39,015
They said it's degenerative now.
298
00:07:39,017 --> 00:07:40,015
>> you wanna die?!
299
00:07:40,017 --> 00:07:41,015
>> early!
300
00:07:41,017 --> 00:07:44,002
>> little gal, I'm sorry we had
301
00:07:44,004 --> 00:07:46,000
So much trouble communicating.
302
00:07:46,002 --> 00:07:47,009
You know what they say,
303
00:07:47,011 --> 00:07:49,011
Mans are from mars, and womans
304
00:07:49,013 --> 00:07:51,009
Are from the rib of them mans.
305
00:07:51,011 --> 00:07:53,001
But wheres the cheating whores
306
00:07:53,003 --> 00:07:54,013
Come from?
307
00:07:54,015 --> 00:07:55,010
I do not know.
308
00:07:55,012 --> 00:07:56,010
I suppose I ought to ask
309
00:07:56,012 --> 00:07:57,010
Your momma.
310
00:07:57,012 --> 00:07:58,010
>> early.
311
00:07:58,012 --> 00:07:59,022
>> oh, I'm sorry.
312
00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:02,011
Darling, I ain't here to gloat.
313
00:08:02,013 --> 00:08:07,013
I'm here to build a bridge.
314
00:08:07,015 --> 00:08:10,011
>> krystal?
315
00:08:10,013 --> 00:08:11,011
Uh, damn decoy!
316
00:08:11,013 --> 00:08:12,011
>> no, that's me.
317
00:08:12,013 --> 00:08:13,022
I'm just ignoring you.
318
00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:14,022
>> dammit!
319
00:08:15,000 --> 00:08:15,022
>> early.
320
00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:17,011
>> oh yeah, yeah that's right.
321
00:08:17,013 --> 00:08:19,010
Darling what can I do?
322
00:08:19,012 --> 00:08:21,004
How can I make it right?
323
00:08:21,006 --> 00:08:23,002
>> well, you can run this
324
00:08:23,004 --> 00:08:24,014
Camera.
325
00:08:24,016 --> 00:08:25,014
>> what the?!
326
00:08:25,016 --> 00:08:26,013
>> we need cutaways for
327
00:08:26,015 --> 00:08:27,012
The money shot.
328
00:08:27,014 --> 00:08:28,012
>> is this the sumbitch that
329
00:08:28,014 --> 00:08:29,012
Gave you the gonorrhea?
330
00:08:29,014 --> 00:08:30,012
>> now that ain't the one
331
00:08:30,014 --> 00:08:31,012
That make you blind is it?
332
00:08:31,014 --> 00:08:32,012
>> I don't know, it ain't
333
00:08:32,014 --> 00:08:35,011
Blinded me yet, and momma likes
334
00:08:35,013 --> 00:08:37,015
What momma sees.
335
00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:38,023
>> well let's get this done!
336
00:08:39,001 --> 00:08:40,002
>> hold on...
337
00:08:40,004 --> 00:08:41,015
>> coochie coo.
338
00:08:41,017 --> 00:08:43,022
>> let me white balance.
339
00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:47,003
>> now for my final apologies,
340
00:08:47,005 --> 00:08:49,011
To those I've hurt the most,
341
00:08:49,013 --> 00:08:56,009
And who mean the most to me.
342
00:08:56,011 --> 00:08:59,003
To you, possum.
343
00:08:59,005 --> 00:09:00,022
It was about meat my friend.
344
00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:03,009
Nothing personal.
345
00:09:03,011 --> 00:09:06,012
And you, whatever you are,
346
00:09:06,014 --> 00:09:07,016
I shouldn't have never hunted
347
00:09:07,018 --> 00:09:09,009
You with dynamite.
348
00:09:09,011 --> 00:09:10,009
Hopefully your pieces will
349
00:09:10,011 --> 00:09:12,013
Reassemble in heaven.
350
00:09:12,015 --> 00:09:15,000
And finally to you, terry trout,
351
00:09:15,002 --> 00:09:16,022
No apology necessary.
352
00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:18,017
>> ♪ splashing down the river ♪
353
00:09:18,019 --> 00:09:19,021
>> never was a welfare check
354
00:09:19,023 --> 00:09:20,021
Spent more wisely!
355
00:09:20,023 --> 00:09:21,021
>> ♪ cause that's where
356
00:09:21,023 --> 00:09:23,017
My baby's gone ♪
357
00:09:23,019 --> 00:09:25,015
>> daddy, you gonna apologize
358
00:09:25,017 --> 00:09:26,017
To us too?
359
00:09:26,019 --> 00:09:28,008
>> for what?
360
00:09:28,010 --> 00:09:29,017
>> well, there was that one
361
00:09:29,019 --> 00:09:31,014
Time when the...
362
00:09:31,016 --> 00:09:33,016
Aah!
363
00:09:33,018 --> 00:09:35,010
Aaaahh!
364
00:09:35,012 --> 00:09:37,012
[ groans ]
365
00:09:37,014 --> 00:09:40,021
>> get outta my way!
366
00:09:40,023 --> 00:09:42,009
Shut your damn mouth!
367
00:09:42,011 --> 00:09:44,006
Ruin the damn plan!
368
00:09:44,008 --> 00:09:48,018
[ grunting ]
369
00:09:48,020 --> 00:09:54,001
[ granny screaming ]
370
00:09:54,003 --> 00:09:55,001
>> well, you're gonna have
371
00:09:55,003 --> 00:09:58,005
To shoot me fir--
372
00:09:58,007 --> 00:09:59,005
>> I don't remember none of
373
00:09:59,007 --> 00:10:00,005
That.
374
00:10:00,007 --> 00:10:01,008
Random isolated incidents.
375
00:10:01,010 --> 00:10:02,008
>> hold on now.
376
00:10:02,010 --> 00:10:03,010
Some of them things took
377
00:10:03,012 --> 00:10:05,012
Planning and consideration.
378
00:10:05,014 --> 00:10:06,012
>> some of them things
379
00:10:06,014 --> 00:10:08,015
You even had to train for!
380
00:10:08,017 --> 00:10:10,019
>> hold on now.
381
00:10:10,021 --> 00:10:12,006
>> ♪ splashing down the river ♪
382
00:10:12,008 --> 00:10:14,014
>> yeah! Ha ha, ha ha!
383
00:10:14,016 --> 00:10:15,015
Singing damn fish!
384
00:10:15,017 --> 00:10:18,018
I love it! I love it.
385
00:10:18,020 --> 00:10:19,013
>> uh, daddy?
386
00:10:19,015 --> 00:10:20,013
>> don't not one of you damn
387
00:10:20,015 --> 00:10:21,018
Son of bitches ever talk
388
00:10:21,020 --> 00:10:23,016
Another word during my song
389
00:10:23,018 --> 00:10:24,018
From my electronical musical
390
00:10:24,020 --> 00:10:26,007
Fish!!
391
00:10:26,009 --> 00:10:28,014
[ footsteps approach ]
392
00:10:28,016 --> 00:10:29,018
>> see.
393
00:10:29,020 --> 00:10:31,015
Wind chimes.
394
00:10:31,017 --> 00:10:32,016
We've got an open door policy
395
00:10:32,018 --> 00:10:33,020
Here now.
396
00:10:33,022 --> 00:10:35,001
We just ask that you keep it
397
00:10:35,003 --> 00:10:36,001
Closed, out of respect for
398
00:10:36,003 --> 00:10:37,001
My authority.
399
00:10:37,003 --> 00:10:38,001
>> what the hell?
400
00:10:38,003 --> 00:10:39,001
This ain't true hd!
401
00:10:39,003 --> 00:10:40,001
>> it's a up-rez.
402
00:10:40,003 --> 00:10:41,001
>> lookie here.
403
00:10:41,003 --> 00:10:42,001
I can see all kinds of digital
404
00:10:42,003 --> 00:10:43,001
Noise in this compression.
405
00:10:43,003 --> 00:10:44,001
I mean come on!
406
00:10:44,003 --> 00:10:45,001
>> I don't.
407
00:10:45,003 --> 00:10:46,001
>> it's supposed to be just
408
00:10:46,003 --> 00:10:47,001
As good.
409
00:10:47,003 --> 00:10:48,001
>> well you didn't get the damn
410
00:10:48,003 --> 00:10:49,007
Blu ray like I asked for denny?
411
00:10:49,009 --> 00:10:50,018
>> a damn antique.
412
00:10:50,020 --> 00:10:54,014
I'm gone!
413
00:10:54,016 --> 00:10:56,010
>> I think hd's pretty good.
414
00:10:56,012 --> 00:10:59,006
>> blu-ray denny, dammit!
415
00:10:59,008 --> 00:11:01,006
Captions provided
416
00:11:01,008 --> 00:11:03,011
By turner studios.
25158
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