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1
00:00:00,614 --> 00:00:02,550
What are you drawing?
2
00:00:02,697 --> 00:00:04,221
A picture, a picture.
3
00:00:04,305 --> 00:00:05,705
A picture of what?
4
00:00:05,789 --> 00:00:06,829
A picture of you.
5
00:00:06,912 --> 00:00:08,033
Well, let me see it.
6
00:00:08,116 --> 00:00:09,717
Wait, it's not finished.
7
00:00:09,800 --> 00:00:12,281
I'll tell you a joke
in the meantime, okay?
8
00:00:12,364 --> 00:00:13,946
Do I have any choice?
9
00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:15,352
No choice at all.
10
00:00:15,362 --> 00:00:16,764
Okay, tell me your joke.
11
00:00:16,764 --> 00:00:19,124
I had an uncle,
his name was Sidney, right?
12
00:00:19,207 --> 00:00:20,928
- Uh-huh.
- Big gambler, right?
13
00:00:20,929 --> 00:00:22,872
- Uh-huh.
- Now, one night he's sleeping.
14
00:00:22,872 --> 00:00:25,232
And he sees a big number five
in his dreams.
15
00:00:25,315 --> 00:00:27,358
Number five, big, right?
16
00:00:27,441 --> 00:00:28,663
- Okay.
- So, he wakes up that morning.
17
00:00:28,700 --> 00:00:30,402
And he says,
"Wow, I had a premonition!"
18
00:00:30,422 --> 00:00:31,544
Goes to the track, right?
19
00:00:31,544 --> 00:00:33,203
Takes the fifth bus
to the track
20
00:00:33,286 --> 00:00:35,226
when he's in the track,
goes up to the fifth window
21
00:00:35,309 --> 00:00:37,865
he bets five dollars
on number five.
22
00:00:37,948 --> 00:00:39,130
What happened?
23
00:00:39,213 --> 00:00:41,914
It worked,
the horse came in fifth.
24
00:00:49,665 --> 00:00:51,601
Lemme see it.
25
00:00:55,076 --> 00:00:57,056
That's funnier than the joke.
26
00:00:59,037 --> 00:01:01,931
[theme music]
27
00:01:06,610 --> 00:01:09,399
♪ Welcome back ♪
28
00:01:09,482 --> 00:01:13,142
♪ Your dreams
were your ticket out ♪
29
00:01:13,225 --> 00:01:15,536
♪ Welcome back ♪
30
00:01:15,619 --> 00:01:20,193
♪ To that same old
place that you laughed about ♪
31
00:01:20,276 --> 00:01:24,632
♪ Well the names have all
changed since you hung around ♪
32
00:01:24,715 --> 00:01:29,071
♪ But those dreams have remained
and they've turned around ♪
33
00:01:29,154 --> 00:01:31,029
♪ Who'd have thought
they'd lead ya ♪
34
00:01:31,112 --> 00:01:33,290
♪ Who'd have thought
they'd lead ya ♪
35
00:01:33,373 --> 00:01:35,335
♪ Back here where
we need ya ♪
36
00:01:35,418 --> 00:01:37,468
♪ Back here where
we need ya ♪
37
00:01:37,551 --> 00:01:41,559
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot
'cause we got him on the spot ♪
38
00:01:41,642 --> 00:01:43,778
♪ Welcome back ♪
39
00:01:43,861 --> 00:01:49,019
♪ Welcome back
welcome back welcome back ♪♪
40
00:01:52,740 --> 00:01:54,200
♪♪
41
00:02:02,228 --> 00:02:03,688
Fine, right.
42
00:02:06,666 --> 00:02:08,495
That's fine, no, I think...
43
00:02:08,578 --> 00:02:09,961
I think Saturday'd be great.
44
00:02:09,961 --> 00:02:12,242
Okay, so we'll see
you guys this weekend?
45
00:02:12,325 --> 00:02:13,325
Terrific.
46
00:02:13,407 --> 00:02:16,823
There's someone at the door.
I gotta go, okay, bye!
47
00:02:27,943 --> 00:02:29,924
You read chapter six, Vinnie?
48
00:02:30,007 --> 00:02:31,682
You know, Mr. Kotter?
49
00:02:31,765 --> 00:02:33,902
I just wanna tell you
that I really appreciate you
50
00:02:33,985 --> 00:02:36,470
taking your time out
to help me with my schoolwork.
51
00:02:36,553 --> 00:02:37,638
- Oh, thank you, Vinnie.
- Really.
52
00:02:37,721 --> 00:02:39,548
Okay, chapter six,
World War II.
53
00:02:39,599 --> 00:02:41,648
I mean, how many teachers
would give up the whole evening
54
00:02:41,731 --> 00:02:43,868
just to help out
a kid like me?
55
00:02:43,951 --> 00:02:45,910
- Not many.
- No?
56
00:02:45,993 --> 00:02:47,130
Okay, World War II...
57
00:02:47,213 --> 00:02:49,415
I mean, it means so much to me.
58
00:02:49,455 --> 00:02:52,034
Really, I mean I figure
you only go around
59
00:02:52,117 --> 00:02:53,518
once in your life, right?
60
00:02:53,518 --> 00:02:55,887
So why go around
11th grade twice?
61
00:02:57,139 --> 00:02:58,500
That's what I say
about this stuff.
62
00:02:58,583 --> 00:03:00,305
Vinnie, enough,
can we get started?
63
00:03:00,305 --> 00:03:02,867
Oh, boy, look...
64
00:03:03,568 --> 00:03:05,547
If you didn't wanna help me
with my homework
65
00:03:05,630 --> 00:03:08,532
why didn't you just say so?
66
00:03:08,553 --> 00:03:09,794
Vinnie, let's get to it okay?
67
00:03:09,835 --> 00:03:11,935
World War II.
68
00:03:12,117 --> 00:03:13,896
Why'd we have world war II
anyway, I mean
69
00:03:13,979 --> 00:03:16,081
was the first one so popular?
70
00:03:17,881 --> 00:03:20,517
It like "the Godfather,"
they had a sequel.
71
00:03:21,526 --> 00:03:24,527
Alright, now how did it start?
72
00:03:24,610 --> 00:03:28,293
Something about a horse's head
being cut off or something.
73
00:03:32,399 --> 00:03:34,073
Not "The Godfather!"
74
00:03:34,156 --> 00:03:36,421
How did World War II start?
75
00:03:36,504 --> 00:03:38,873
I don't know, I didn't see that.
76
00:03:40,309 --> 00:03:43,367
Alright, alright,
we'll take a different approach.
77
00:03:43,450 --> 00:03:46,734
I wanna know how much you can
tell me about specific events.
78
00:03:46,817 --> 00:03:48,678
Now, what do you know
about D-day?
79
00:03:48,719 --> 00:03:52,423
D-day is the day that
I bring home my report card.
80
00:03:52,549 --> 00:03:54,255
[phone ringing]
81
00:03:54,338 --> 00:03:55,991
hey, if that's a girl for me,
just tell her I ain't here
82
00:03:56,074 --> 00:03:57,534
alright?
83
00:03:57,880 --> 00:04:00,965
Boy, wherever I go,
they track me down, you know?
84
00:04:01,048 --> 00:04:03,011
How the hell they do it!
85
00:04:03,012 --> 00:04:05,915
All I do is give 'em
your phone number.
86
00:04:06,056 --> 00:04:07,056
Hello?
87
00:04:07,139 --> 00:04:09,022
No, I'm sorry,
Mrs. Kotter isn't in.
88
00:04:09,022 --> 00:04:10,742
Hey, you mind
if I make myself a sandwich?
89
00:04:10,825 --> 00:04:12,660
No, no, go ahead.
90
00:04:12,743 --> 00:04:14,788
Oh, Dr. Mel Melman,
how're you doing?
91
00:04:14,871 --> 00:04:16,471
What do you got?
92
00:04:16,554 --> 00:04:18,014
Excuse me a second?
93
00:04:18,097 --> 00:04:21,612
We got, uh, salami,
bologna, and tuna.
94
00:04:21,695 --> 00:04:25,077
Hi. Wow, it's been a long time,
how you been doctor?
95
00:04:25,161 --> 00:04:27,053
You got any liverwurst?
96
00:04:28,400 --> 00:04:29,662
Can you hold on a second?
97
00:04:29,745 --> 00:04:33,404
We have salami, bologna,
and tuna, that's it, Vinnie!
98
00:04:33,488 --> 00:04:36,268
Look, uh, doc, I didn't know
Julie was in to see you.
99
00:04:36,351 --> 00:04:39,254
Hey, you know, a lot of people
like liverwurst.
100
00:04:40,632 --> 00:04:42,232
It's good for you.
101
00:04:42,315 --> 00:04:44,258
My mother, she buys it
for me all the time, delicious.
102
00:04:44,278 --> 00:04:46,657
Vinnie, Vinnie, I'm having
an important conversation
103
00:04:46,740 --> 00:04:48,400
with a doctor, okay?
104
00:04:48,481 --> 00:04:50,622
Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know.
105
00:04:51,664 --> 00:04:53,963
Hey, you ask that doctor,
you ask him if liverwurst
106
00:04:54,046 --> 00:04:55,324
is good for you.
107
00:04:55,407 --> 00:04:56,508
I bet he'll tell you yes.
108
00:04:56,508 --> 00:04:58,287
Vinnie, why don't you
have a banana?
109
00:04:58,370 --> 00:04:59,461
Go ahead, enjoy yourself.
110
00:04:59,531 --> 00:05:01,352
I'll see what I can do.
111
00:05:01,436 --> 00:05:03,611
Uh, look, doc, I mean,
I'm Julie 's husband
112
00:05:03,695 --> 00:05:06,296
if something's wrong,
I should know.
113
00:05:07,017 --> 00:05:08,477
What?
114
00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:12,262
Well, how long has she got?
115
00:05:13,463 --> 00:05:14,923
Seven months?
116
00:05:15,404 --> 00:05:17,505
That's terrific, doc!
117
00:05:17,807 --> 00:05:20,878
Oh, okay, I'll see ya,
thanks a lot!
118
00:05:20,962 --> 00:05:22,421
Bye-bye!
119
00:05:22,824 --> 00:05:24,284
Vinnie!
120
00:05:24,567 --> 00:05:26,027
Julie's pregnant!
121
00:05:37,801 --> 00:05:39,803
Don't look at me,
me and Mrs. Kotter
122
00:05:39,886 --> 00:05:44,291
we's just good friends,
you know?
123
00:05:44,312 --> 00:05:47,482
Don't be ridiculous, Vinnie,
I know who the father is.
124
00:05:47,818 --> 00:05:49,318
Who?
125
00:05:51,513 --> 00:05:52,513
Me!
126
00:05:52,596 --> 00:05:54,056
Good.
127
00:05:54,635 --> 00:05:56,159
Because, you know what,
what I was gonna say
128
00:05:56,242 --> 00:05:58,026
was that if you wasn't,
that could put
129
00:05:58,104 --> 00:06:00,388
an awful strain
on your marriage.
130
00:06:02,951 --> 00:06:04,351
Boy, you know,
it's hard to believe
131
00:06:04,434 --> 00:06:06,534
me, a father.
132
00:06:06,777 --> 00:06:08,798
I know what you mean.
133
00:06:09,721 --> 00:06:12,061
I never been a father neither,
you know?
134
00:06:12,145 --> 00:06:14,781
But I worry about it
all the time.
135
00:06:16,642 --> 00:06:18,583
I can't wait to tell Julie!
136
00:06:18,666 --> 00:06:21,051
She's gonna be so excited!
137
00:06:21,134 --> 00:06:23,214
You know, I'm happy...
138
00:06:23,297 --> 00:06:26,445
...but in a way,
it makes me feel kinda old.
139
00:06:26,528 --> 00:06:28,638
Well, you are kinda old.
140
00:06:30,599 --> 00:06:32,699
- Hi!
- Hi, honey!
141
00:06:33,200 --> 00:06:34,660
Hi!
142
00:06:36,866 --> 00:06:38,686
I didn't expect you
home so early.
143
00:06:38,769 --> 00:06:41,212
Well, I know, the bridge game
broke up a little early.
144
00:06:41,232 --> 00:06:43,115
We caught
Candy Lieberman cheating.
145
00:06:43,115 --> 00:06:44,954
You know, she had
three tricks hidden down
146
00:06:45,037 --> 00:06:47,277
the front of her dress?
147
00:06:47,361 --> 00:06:50,283
Well, she needs
all the help she can get.
148
00:06:50,561 --> 00:06:52,585
- You want some coffee?
- Yeah, yeah, coffee.
149
00:06:52,668 --> 00:06:53,968
- Vinnie?
- No, no for me, no.
150
00:06:54,051 --> 00:06:56,413
- Okay.
- Vinnie, Vinnie.
151
00:06:57,652 --> 00:07:00,575
Listen, uh, don't you have
something to do tonight?
152
00:07:00,659 --> 00:07:03,028
No, I got the whole night free.
153
00:07:04,525 --> 00:07:07,484
Vinnie, I bet you're wondering
what Dolores Delvecchio's
154
00:07:07,568 --> 00:07:09,070
doing tonight, huh?
155
00:07:09,089 --> 00:07:12,136
I already know what she's doing,
she's with Epstein.
156
00:07:12,174 --> 00:07:14,153
Tuesday's his night.
157
00:07:16,239 --> 00:07:20,141
Vinnie, I wanna talk
to Julie alone.
158
00:07:20,224 --> 00:07:23,047
Well, look, if you wanted
me to leave
159
00:07:23,047 --> 00:07:25,683
why didn't you just say,
"Hey, Vinnie, leave."
160
00:07:26,411 --> 00:07:28,217
Hey, Vinnie, leave.
161
00:07:29,655 --> 00:07:32,164
Now, wasn't that simple?
162
00:07:32,247 --> 00:07:34,932
And, uh, don't say
anything to Julie, okay?
163
00:07:35,015 --> 00:07:36,015
- I wanna tell her.
- Alright.
164
00:07:36,016 --> 00:07:39,282
Well, what about
this World War II stuff?
165
00:07:39,282 --> 00:07:41,142
Oh, yeah, World War II, uh,
I'll tell ya the high point
166
00:07:41,225 --> 00:07:42,685
we won.
167
00:07:43,976 --> 00:07:45,790
- Hey, Mrs. Kotter?
- What, Vinnie?
168
00:07:45,873 --> 00:07:48,551
If in the next couple of months,
you start to get real big--
169
00:07:48,552 --> 00:07:50,012
Vinnie!
170
00:07:51,431 --> 00:07:52,780
Just take it easy.
171
00:07:52,863 --> 00:07:55,063
Real big, big, cravings...
172
00:07:55,146 --> 00:07:57,246
Buy some liverwurst.
173
00:07:57,508 --> 00:07:59,206
A lot of people like it.
174
00:07:59,289 --> 00:08:01,372
- A lot of people eat it.
- Thanks, Vinnie.
175
00:08:01,373 --> 00:08:03,152
You can put it on your crackers.
176
00:08:03,235 --> 00:08:05,858
- Yeah, okay.
- You can put it on sandwiches.
177
00:08:05,858 --> 00:08:07,680
Or, if you're in a hurry,
you can eat it
178
00:08:07,680 --> 00:08:11,300
right out of the tube,
delicious.
179
00:08:19,710 --> 00:08:21,311
How are ya feeling?
180
00:08:21,394 --> 00:08:22,854
Fine, honey.
181
00:08:23,965 --> 00:08:26,065
You look a little pale.
182
00:08:26,988 --> 00:08:29,867
Oh, it's probably from trying to
help Vinnie study.
183
00:08:29,950 --> 00:08:30,950
Oh...
184
00:08:31,033 --> 00:08:32,492
Julie?
185
00:08:32,993 --> 00:08:33,993
What?
186
00:08:34,076 --> 00:08:36,176
I want you to sit down.
187
00:08:37,660 --> 00:08:39,901
Thank you, I prefer standing.
188
00:08:41,164 --> 00:08:43,824
Okay, I have something
important to tell you.
189
00:08:43,907 --> 00:08:45,367
Okay, honey.
190
00:08:46,350 --> 00:08:48,670
It's really heavy,
so I want you to make sure
191
00:08:48,753 --> 00:08:50,406
that you're ready for it.
192
00:08:50,434 --> 00:08:51,896
If it's that
we won World War II
193
00:08:51,936 --> 00:08:53,997
I heard you tell Vinnie.
194
00:08:54,860 --> 00:08:56,879
Julie, forget about
World War II.
195
00:08:56,962 --> 00:08:57,962
Okay.
196
00:08:58,045 --> 00:09:01,722
Now, be calm, don't get excited.
197
00:09:04,735 --> 00:09:06,195
I'm pregnant.
198
00:09:11,004 --> 00:09:13,104
No, I'm not, uh...
199
00:09:13,412 --> 00:09:15,007
We're preg...
No, we're not.
200
00:09:15,090 --> 00:09:18,493
You're pregnant,
Dr. Mel Melman just called.
201
00:09:19,970 --> 00:09:22,472
You mean it's true?
202
00:09:22,570 --> 00:09:24,093
I'm gonna be a mother?
203
00:09:24,176 --> 00:09:27,613
Right, and I'm gonna be
a father, worked out just right.
204
00:09:29,884 --> 00:09:31,344
Oh, boy.
205
00:09:35,252 --> 00:09:36,852
You think it's safe for you
to get so excited
206
00:09:36,934 --> 00:09:39,035
in your condition?
207
00:09:39,298 --> 00:09:42,200
That's right, my condition!
208
00:09:42,283 --> 00:09:44,919
I have a condition
all of a sudden!
209
00:09:45,284 --> 00:09:48,047
I am actually pregnant!
210
00:09:48,130 --> 00:09:51,212
But, Julie, I mean, we were
always planning to have a baby.
211
00:09:51,295 --> 00:09:54,340
I know, but not now,
I mean, this year the most
212
00:09:54,380 --> 00:09:57,016
I was planning on
was a new coat.
213
00:09:58,306 --> 00:10:02,010
This is better than a new coat,
won't go out of style.
214
00:10:03,912 --> 00:10:06,336
You know, it was my fault.
215
00:10:06,419 --> 00:10:08,769
See, I had this system,
every morning I'd go
216
00:10:08,783 --> 00:10:11,023
into the bathroom
and I'd brush my teeth
217
00:10:11,106 --> 00:10:13,497
and I'd take my little pill...
218
00:10:13,497 --> 00:10:15,417
...and one morning I forgot.
219
00:10:15,500 --> 00:10:17,869
See what happens
when you don't brush?
220
00:10:20,647 --> 00:10:22,163
Julie, look, I'm excited!
221
00:10:22,246 --> 00:10:25,290
Forget about excited,
I'm ecstatic!
222
00:10:25,373 --> 00:10:29,247
Honey, do you really think
that I'm ready to be a mother?
223
00:10:29,318 --> 00:10:32,299
I mean I can't even remember
to water the plants!
224
00:10:32,381 --> 00:10:34,842
Well, don't worry about that.
225
00:10:34,925 --> 00:10:37,165
Baby's gonna water itself.
226
00:10:40,352 --> 00:10:42,653
That's very funny, Gabe.
227
00:10:43,491 --> 00:10:45,573
We don't even know
how to handle a baby.
228
00:10:45,655 --> 00:10:46,958
I know how
to handle babies.
229
00:10:46,958 --> 00:10:49,838
I handle Arnold Horshack
every day.
230
00:10:49,921 --> 00:10:53,463
Well, see, it's easier for you,
you're good with children.
231
00:10:53,546 --> 00:10:55,646
Julie, don't worry.
232
00:10:55,888 --> 00:10:57,650
You're gonna be terrific.
233
00:10:58,792 --> 00:11:00,691
You know it's gonna change
our lives, Gabe.
234
00:11:00,774 --> 00:11:03,037
This apartment isn't big enough.
235
00:11:03,037 --> 00:11:05,258
We'll get a bigger one.
236
00:11:08,063 --> 00:11:11,526
Baby's a big responsibility,
honey.
237
00:11:14,726 --> 00:11:16,186
Julie...
238
00:11:17,533 --> 00:11:20,651
I think I know what
the problem is, you're scared.
239
00:11:20,734 --> 00:11:22,196
How do you know?
240
00:11:22,279 --> 00:11:24,302
It's because I'm scared too.
241
00:11:25,863 --> 00:11:27,885
We'll be scared together.
242
00:11:29,408 --> 00:11:30,868
Okay.
243
00:11:31,510 --> 00:11:33,811
We won't be fat together.
244
00:11:39,860 --> 00:11:44,003
Julie, pregnant women
are beautiful, you'll glow.
245
00:11:46,983 --> 00:11:49,039
I don't know.
246
00:11:49,122 --> 00:11:52,002
The thought of spending a half
hour trying to hoist myself
247
00:11:52,085 --> 00:11:55,847
out of a chair
is not my idea of glowing.
248
00:11:56,969 --> 00:11:59,449
Oh, honey, you just don't
understand, you're a man
249
00:11:59,532 --> 00:12:02,312
you don't have to go through it.
250
00:12:02,395 --> 00:12:03,855
I know.
251
00:12:05,378 --> 00:12:07,538
But I'll promise, I'll watch.
252
00:12:09,085 --> 00:12:10,545
♪♪
253
00:12:18,399 --> 00:12:19,448
♪♪
254
00:12:19,531 --> 00:12:22,347
[indistinct chatter]
255
00:12:22,430 --> 00:12:24,606
So, come on, Arnold,
how much money we got?
256
00:12:24,689 --> 00:12:27,892
Keep your shirt on,
I'm still counting it!
257
00:12:28,976 --> 00:12:31,497
So, what kind of present
do we get a baby?
258
00:12:31,580 --> 00:12:32,452
I don't know.
259
00:12:32,462 --> 00:12:34,742
Let's throw him a party.
260
00:12:34,825 --> 00:12:36,505
A party, Vinnie?
261
00:12:36,588 --> 00:12:40,191
Yeah. He's new
in the neighborhood.
262
00:12:40,879 --> 00:12:44,244
Give him a chance
to meet people, make friends.
263
00:12:44,327 --> 00:12:47,969
Come on, Vinnie,
babies don't have parties!
264
00:12:48,052 --> 00:12:52,095
They do too, they sit around
and drink milk, right?
265
00:12:52,178 --> 00:12:55,081
And after a while,
they burp up a lot.
266
00:12:55,721 --> 00:12:59,565
I know, why don't we get
the baby a savings bond?
267
00:12:59,648 --> 00:13:01,748
On 89 cents?
268
00:13:02,169 --> 00:13:05,595
Sure, in ten years,
it'll be worth $1.14.
269
00:13:05,678 --> 00:13:09,268
The kid'll be set for life.
270
00:13:09,914 --> 00:13:12,254
Yeah, I wonder what they're
gonna name it?
271
00:13:12,337 --> 00:13:13,797
Probably "Kotter."
272
00:13:15,582 --> 00:13:17,435
You know, it's gonna be nice
having a little Kotter
273
00:13:17,518 --> 00:13:18,673
running around here, yeah?
274
00:13:18,756 --> 00:13:20,192
Well, at least,16 years
from now, he's gonna be
275
00:13:20,275 --> 00:13:22,971
going to school, right here!
276
00:13:23,054 --> 00:13:25,232
Yeah, he could sit next to me.
277
00:13:25,232 --> 00:13:28,126
[laughing]
278
00:13:29,743 --> 00:13:32,425
- How're you doing, guys?
- How are you?
279
00:13:32,508 --> 00:13:35,070
Oh, Mr. Kotter!
280
00:13:36,094 --> 00:13:38,355
You big devil!
281
00:13:39,749 --> 00:13:45,211
Congratulations, Vinnie told us
the good news, you big buckaroo!
282
00:13:46,798 --> 00:13:47,740
Thanks a lot, Arnold.
283
00:13:47,823 --> 00:13:49,303
Well, having a baby.
284
00:13:49,386 --> 00:13:50,386
Yeah.
285
00:13:50,469 --> 00:13:52,714
Let's hope it favors the missus.
286
00:13:52,714 --> 00:13:55,339
Yeah, we wish you
all the happiness in the world.
287
00:13:55,359 --> 00:13:58,743
Yeah, that's right, even though
the whole thing is kinda
288
00:13:58,826 --> 00:14:00,787
hard to believe.
289
00:14:02,226 --> 00:14:04,468
What's so hard to believe
about Julie and me
290
00:14:04,551 --> 00:14:05,351
having a baby?
291
00:14:05,352 --> 00:14:09,016
Well, you know, we think of you
as a teacher, not a person
292
00:14:09,099 --> 00:14:10,720
you know?
293
00:14:10,962 --> 00:14:12,964
He's right,
and it's hard for us
294
00:14:13,047 --> 00:14:16,130
to imagine a teacher
doing stuff like that.
295
00:14:17,275 --> 00:14:20,679
Well, they do.
At least he does.
296
00:14:21,135 --> 00:14:23,481
So, what's your preference,
boy or girl?
297
00:14:23,564 --> 00:14:24,967
You know, I haven't
even thought about it.
298
00:14:24,987 --> 00:14:26,488
I don't really care.
299
00:14:26,571 --> 00:14:30,959
Oh, before I was born,
my mother said
300
00:14:31,042 --> 00:14:34,306
"Oh, birth is a miracle.
301
00:14:34,389 --> 00:14:36,587
I don't care what it is."
302
00:14:36,608 --> 00:14:39,503
Arnold, that's absolutely right.
303
00:14:39,586 --> 00:14:43,349
And as the years go on
and the miracle continues
304
00:14:43,432 --> 00:14:46,855
people are still trying
to figure out what it is.
305
00:14:46,938 --> 00:14:48,398
Freddie!
306
00:14:49,240 --> 00:14:51,223
Alright, guys, I think it's
about time for everybody
307
00:14:51,223 --> 00:14:52,659
to go to class, huh?
308
00:14:52,742 --> 00:14:54,242
Nah, I don't think it's time
to got to class.
309
00:14:54,243 --> 00:14:56,465
- What time you got?
- Oh, no, I got plenty of time.
310
00:14:56,466 --> 00:14:57,569
How about yourself, Vin?
311
00:14:57,570 --> 00:15:01,073
No, we prefer
to be fashionably late.
312
00:15:02,018 --> 00:15:04,377
Gentlemen, the old sundial
in my head tells me
313
00:15:04,460 --> 00:15:07,158
that it's time
to go into school.
314
00:15:07,202 --> 00:15:09,465
Hey, look, if you want
us to go to class
315
00:15:09,545 --> 00:15:13,197
why don't you just say,
"Hey, guys, go to class."
316
00:15:13,280 --> 00:15:15,587
Hey, guys, go to class.
317
00:15:15,670 --> 00:15:17,476
Wasn't that simple?
318
00:15:18,832 --> 00:15:20,681
Come on, let's go!
319
00:15:21,590 --> 00:15:23,554
[Arnold] Oh, Mr. Woodman!
320
00:15:23,637 --> 00:15:27,097
Mr. Woodman, did you hear
the happy news?
321
00:15:27,180 --> 00:15:30,639
Mr. Kotter is gonna be a father!
322
00:15:33,787 --> 00:15:37,810
Oh, good grief, Kotter,
this time you've gone too far.
323
00:15:40,453 --> 00:15:42,650
Who is it, what's her name?
324
00:15:44,418 --> 00:15:46,374
It's my wife!
325
00:15:46,457 --> 00:15:50,482
Oh... thank heavens,
what a relief.
326
00:15:50,565 --> 00:15:53,385
Mr. Woodman, aren't you gonna
tell me you're happy for me?
327
00:15:53,468 --> 00:15:55,729
Sure, nice going, Kotter.
328
00:15:57,369 --> 00:15:59,207
You got the wife pregnant...
329
00:15:59,290 --> 00:16:01,770
...and the only way you're gonna
support a family on your salary
330
00:16:01,853 --> 00:16:03,955
is by holding up gas stations.
331
00:16:05,015 --> 00:16:06,697
You're right, you know,
there's one on Avenue West
332
00:16:06,780 --> 00:16:09,950
I could be in and out
in about two minutes.
333
00:16:10,566 --> 00:16:12,366
Mr. Woodman...
334
00:16:12,886 --> 00:16:14,569
...do you ever miss
not having any children?
335
00:16:14,652 --> 00:16:16,972
No, Kotter, I've got
2,000 kids right here
336
00:16:17,055 --> 00:16:19,236
that won't listen to me.
337
00:16:21,250 --> 00:16:23,774
Don't you ever wish
you could hear the patter
338
00:16:23,813 --> 00:16:25,636
of little feet around the house?
339
00:16:25,636 --> 00:16:28,806
I've already got that,
there are mice in my building.
340
00:16:29,999 --> 00:16:32,782
You know, Mr. Woodman,
I'm really happy about the baby
341
00:16:32,782 --> 00:16:35,582
but... it seems my wife
just isn't as thrilled
342
00:16:35,665 --> 00:16:37,647
as I thought she'd be.
343
00:16:37,647 --> 00:16:40,007
Well, if I were Julie,
I wouldn't be too thrilled
344
00:16:40,090 --> 00:16:42,591
about having your baby either.
345
00:16:44,874 --> 00:16:47,028
[laughing]
346
00:16:52,432 --> 00:16:54,090
[knocking on door]
347
00:16:54,173 --> 00:16:55,633
Oh, boy.
348
00:16:56,538 --> 00:17:00,041
Oh, somehow I just don't feel
like I'm glowing.
349
00:17:02,186 --> 00:17:03,646
Oh, no.
350
00:17:04,469 --> 00:17:06,148
How ya doin'?
351
00:17:06,232 --> 00:17:09,126
Oh, the lady in waiting!
352
00:17:10,618 --> 00:17:13,975
Mrs. Kotter,
we're so happy for you!
353
00:17:14,059 --> 00:17:15,148
Thank you, Arnold.
354
00:17:15,231 --> 00:17:16,503
So happy.
355
00:17:16,586 --> 00:17:19,958
Happy, happy... happy.
356
00:17:22,146 --> 00:17:23,610
But you'd better stop that
or I'm not gonna make it
357
00:17:23,610 --> 00:17:25,414
through this conversation.
358
00:17:25,497 --> 00:17:27,741
Hey, Mrs. Kotter,
I bought you a little something
359
00:17:27,824 --> 00:17:29,260
for good luck, you know?
360
00:17:29,329 --> 00:17:32,536
It's my Brother Sanchez's
baby booty.
361
00:17:32,619 --> 00:17:34,686
We had it bronzed.
362
00:17:41,666 --> 00:17:44,465
Sanchez was a big baby.
363
00:17:44,549 --> 00:17:47,166
Nah, he just had big feet.
364
00:17:47,249 --> 00:17:48,731
Well, thanks, Juan.
365
00:17:48,814 --> 00:17:51,573
Now we won't have to buy a crib.
366
00:17:51,657 --> 00:17:54,677
And just think, instead of
tucking him in at night
367
00:17:54,760 --> 00:17:56,862
we can just lace him in.
368
00:17:57,760 --> 00:18:01,063
Hey, Mrs. Kotter, what's that
book you're reading?
369
00:18:01,147 --> 00:18:02,324
Dr. Spock.
370
00:18:02,407 --> 00:18:03,627
Dr. Spock!
371
00:18:03,710 --> 00:18:06,671
Hey, I'm a
big "Star Trek" fan too.
372
00:18:09,442 --> 00:18:13,461
So, where is the little father?
373
00:18:14,991 --> 00:18:20,015
I don't know, I was just
wondering the same thing myself.
374
00:18:20,099 --> 00:18:23,363
Hey, Mrs. Kotter, you still
don't got no liverwurst.
375
00:18:23,363 --> 00:18:25,021
Sorry, Vinnie, I just haven't
been able to work up
376
00:18:25,104 --> 00:18:27,463
a craving for it yet.
377
00:18:27,546 --> 00:18:28,648
Hey, ain't people
in your condition
378
00:18:28,648 --> 00:18:31,786
are supposed to get all kinds of
strange cravings?
379
00:18:31,869 --> 00:18:32,992
Well, when my mother
was pregnant
380
00:18:32,992 --> 00:18:35,129
she used to want
hot peppers, you know?
381
00:18:35,212 --> 00:18:38,835
Every day, hot peppers,
hot peppers, hot peppers.
382
00:18:38,897 --> 00:18:40,376
When we was born,
the first thing we asked for
383
00:18:40,459 --> 00:18:42,613
was a glass of water.
384
00:18:47,106 --> 00:18:49,186
Listen, Vincent...
385
00:18:50,330 --> 00:18:52,690
If you're still hungry,
I still have a little
386
00:18:52,773 --> 00:18:55,571
of my own gourmet lunch
left over.
387
00:18:55,655 --> 00:18:57,917
Let me se...
Yes, I do!
388
00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:02,073
I've got bacon, lettuce,
and Eskimo pie sandwich.
389
00:19:02,073 --> 00:19:03,533
Yuck!
390
00:19:04,125 --> 00:19:05,083
Nah!
391
00:19:05,166 --> 00:19:06,602
Ugh, no, get outta here!
392
00:19:06,611 --> 00:19:08,591
Arnold, give me that!
393
00:19:10,616 --> 00:19:12,552
I'm not that pregnant.
394
00:19:14,821 --> 00:19:17,680
Hi, guys.
Hi, Julie.
395
00:19:17,763 --> 00:19:19,399
- Hey, how're ya doin?
- Hey, Mr. Kotter.
396
00:19:19,483 --> 00:19:21,544
Hi, honey, where ya been?
397
00:19:21,628 --> 00:19:24,348
Well, I was walking
around thinking.
398
00:19:24,431 --> 00:19:25,446
Thinking!
399
00:19:25,529 --> 00:19:27,030
In this neighborhood?
400
00:19:27,113 --> 00:19:28,412
Well, what were
you thinking about?
401
00:19:28,494 --> 00:19:30,234
Getting mugged?
402
00:19:32,196 --> 00:19:35,458
Haven't you guys got anything
to do tonight?
403
00:19:35,542 --> 00:19:39,306
- How about you, little Juan...
- Oh, no, I got plenty of time.
404
00:19:39,326 --> 00:19:42,628
You're in luck,
we're free for the evening!
405
00:19:43,554 --> 00:19:45,816
You know I remember one of ya
telling me that there was
406
00:19:45,816 --> 00:19:49,160
something, uh, important
that you guys had to do tonight.
407
00:19:49,398 --> 00:19:50,339
- Nah.
- No.
408
00:19:50,422 --> 00:19:52,421
We thought that
we would stay here with you
409
00:19:52,504 --> 00:19:55,486
and the little mother,
and celebrate!
410
00:19:58,530 --> 00:20:01,670
I have a good memory,
really good memory
411
00:20:01,754 --> 00:20:05,398
and one of you guys told me
this afternoon
412
00:20:05,398 --> 00:20:09,346
"We have something important
to do tonight."
413
00:20:09,346 --> 00:20:12,089
Hey, look, if you want us
to leave, just say
414
00:20:12,109 --> 00:20:14,089
"Hey, guys, leave."
415
00:20:15,212 --> 00:20:17,311
Hey, guys, leave.
416
00:20:17,594 --> 00:20:20,836
See, wasn't that simple?
417
00:20:22,141 --> 00:20:25,779
- Alright, see ya.
- I'm gonna watch TV tonight.
418
00:20:25,862 --> 00:20:29,539
They're thinking of giving the
bionic woman bigger transistors.
419
00:20:32,083 --> 00:20:35,348
Oh, yeah, and I almost forgot,
I got me some tickets
420
00:20:35,431 --> 00:20:38,129
to the Jimmie Walker
Film Festival.
421
00:20:38,213 --> 00:20:40,237
Dyn-o-mite!
422
00:20:44,085 --> 00:20:45,818
Alright,
see you guys tomorrow!
423
00:20:45,901 --> 00:20:47,293
See ya tomorrow.
424
00:20:47,376 --> 00:20:48,846
Yeah, we'll see you tomorrow.
425
00:20:48,852 --> 00:20:51,872
Hey, nothing's gonna happen
before then, is it?
426
00:20:51,955 --> 00:20:54,326
- No, Arnold.
- Okay, goodbye!
427
00:20:57,263 --> 00:21:02,637
So, missus... come with me.
428
00:21:03,612 --> 00:21:05,765
At last we are alone.
429
00:21:08,759 --> 00:21:13,503
Yup, just the three of us.
430
00:21:14,119 --> 00:21:16,743
Julie, I've been doing a lot
of heavy thinking.
431
00:21:16,826 --> 00:21:19,367
Wait a second, honey.
432
00:21:19,450 --> 00:21:20,650
You know, while you
were gone today
433
00:21:20,732 --> 00:21:22,391
I was thinking too.
434
00:21:22,475 --> 00:21:25,477
And I was thinking
what if Gabe would just
435
00:21:25,560 --> 00:21:30,005
come to me and said,
"Hey, Julie, let's have a baby!"
436
00:21:30,005 --> 00:21:32,790
You wanna know
what I would have answered?
437
00:21:32,791 --> 00:21:35,052
I would answer yes.
438
00:21:35,135 --> 00:21:37,771
All you had to do was ask me.
439
00:21:38,601 --> 00:21:41,172
Julie, would you like
to have a baby?
440
00:21:41,255 --> 00:21:42,715
Yes!
441
00:21:43,138 --> 00:21:45,595
See, wasn't that simple?
442
00:21:49,186 --> 00:21:51,006
Where's the baby?
443
00:21:51,769 --> 00:21:53,923
It's not that simple.
444
00:21:55,771 --> 00:21:58,534
Julie, the baby isn't something
that you're doing for me, is it?
445
00:21:58,618 --> 00:22:00,520
I mean, it's something
you really want?
446
00:22:00,540 --> 00:22:03,344
Yes, I want it very much.
447
00:22:03,344 --> 00:22:05,713
'Cause I love you
very much, honey.
448
00:22:06,969 --> 00:22:08,863
I love you too.
449
00:22:13,154 --> 00:22:15,734
I hope the baby has your hair.
450
00:22:15,818 --> 00:22:17,858
And your eyes.
451
00:22:17,941 --> 00:22:19,541
And your smile.
452
00:22:19,624 --> 00:22:21,952
But not your jokes.
453
00:22:25,073 --> 00:22:28,274
Hey, that's right, there'll be
somebody new around the house!
454
00:22:28,358 --> 00:22:32,140
Somebody that hasn't heard
any of my jokes!
455
00:22:32,224 --> 00:22:34,568
I could tell about my Uncle Ben
and then there's the one about...
456
00:22:34,568 --> 00:22:36,668
- My Uncle Mark, I could tell...
- No, Gabe, Gabe, no...
457
00:22:36,975 --> 00:22:38,897
Here, read this, you have
a lot of things to learn.
458
00:22:38,980 --> 00:22:40,289
Okay, read it.
459
00:22:40,372 --> 00:22:41,832
♪♪
460
00:22:50,814 --> 00:22:52,274
Julie?
461
00:22:55,458 --> 00:22:57,679
She'll be right back, Roscoe.
462
00:22:59,603 --> 00:23:02,584
Boy, baby's gonna
love you, Roscoe.
463
00:23:09,414 --> 00:23:10,595
Did I ever tell you
about my uncle
464
00:23:10,595 --> 00:23:13,696
who had a dog named Roscoe?
465
00:23:13,779 --> 00:23:16,018
Yeah, my uncle had a dog
named Roscoe, right?
466
00:23:16,101 --> 00:23:17,923
Goes into a bar
and he say to the bartender
467
00:23:17,964 --> 00:23:20,578
"My dog here, Roscoe, can talk!"
468
00:23:20,578 --> 00:23:23,441
Well, what did
the bartender say?
469
00:23:23,441 --> 00:23:25,196
Well, the bartender said,
"That's ridiculous!"
470
00:23:25,280 --> 00:23:26,521
So, I says,
"Well, I'll show you.
471
00:23:26,604 --> 00:23:28,946
Roscoe, what's on top
of the building?"
472
00:23:28,965 --> 00:23:31,065
Roscoe goes, "Ruff!"
473
00:23:33,671 --> 00:23:35,237
Then he looks at Roscoe,
he says, "Roscoe
474
00:23:35,311 --> 00:23:37,231
who's the greatest ball player
of all time?"
475
00:23:37,314 --> 00:23:40,273
And roscoe goes, "Ruff!"
476
00:23:40,357 --> 00:23:42,295
Bartender throws them both out.
477
00:23:43,619 --> 00:23:44,802
They get on the street
and Roscoe looks
478
00:23:44,802 --> 00:23:45,923
at my uncle and says
479
00:23:45,923 --> 00:23:48,203
"You think I should've
said DiMaggio?"
480
00:23:50,377 --> 00:23:51,837
♪♪
481
00:23:59,167 --> 00:24:01,932
[theme music]
482
00:24:06,523 --> 00:24:09,312
♪ Welcome back ♪
483
00:24:09,396 --> 00:24:12,794
♪ Your dreams
were your ticket out ♪
484
00:24:12,878 --> 00:24:15,362
♪ Welcome back ♪
485
00:24:15,446 --> 00:24:20,017
♪ To that same old place
that you laughed about ♪
486
00:24:20,100 --> 00:24:24,415
♪ Well the names have all
changed since you hung around ♪
487
00:24:24,498 --> 00:24:26,373
♪ But those dreams
have remained ♪
488
00:24:26,456 --> 00:24:28,766
♪ And they've turned around ♪
489
00:24:28,850 --> 00:24:31,030
♪ Who would have thought
they'd lead you ♪
490
00:24:31,113 --> 00:24:32,858
♪ Who would have thought
they'd lead you ♪
491
00:24:32,941 --> 00:24:35,033
♪ Back here
where we need you ♪
492
00:24:35,117 --> 00:24:37,209
♪ Back here
where we need you ♪
493
00:24:37,292 --> 00:24:41,127
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot
'cause we got him on the spot ♪
494
00:24:41,210 --> 00:24:43,434
♪ Welcome back ♪
495
00:24:43,517 --> 00:24:47,830
♪ Welcome back welcome back
welcome back ♪
496
00:24:47,913 --> 00:24:50,049
♪ Welcome back welcome back ♪
497
00:24:50,132 --> 00:24:52,747
♪ Welcome back ♪
498
00:24:52,830 --> 00:24:56,578
♪ We always could spot
a friend ♪
499
00:24:56,661 --> 00:24:58,927
♪ Welcome back ♪
500
00:24:59,011 --> 00:25:03,758
♪ And I smile when I think
how it must've been ♪
501
00:25:03,841 --> 00:25:06,975
♪ And I know what a scene
we were learning... ♪♪
36265
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