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1
00:00:01,825 --> 00:00:02,912
Did I ever tell you
about my Aunt Esther
2
00:00:02,912 --> 00:00:05,548
who was a matron
in a movie house?
3
00:00:06,273 --> 00:00:09,677
No. But go ahead.
4
00:00:09,760 --> 00:00:11,599
Well, she's a matron
in the movie house for years
5
00:00:11,682 --> 00:00:13,942
and years and years, and one
time she's walking down the isle
6
00:00:14,025 --> 00:00:15,427
and she sees this guy
lying there
7
00:00:15,427 --> 00:00:18,230
stretched over about six seats
like this.
8
00:00:18,230 --> 00:00:21,050
And she said, "Don't you know
how to act in a movie house?
9
00:00:21,133 --> 00:00:23,796
"You can't do that. Just what
do you think you're doing?
10
00:00:23,816 --> 00:00:25,596
Where did you come from?"
11
00:00:25,678 --> 00:00:28,397
He said, "The balcony."
12
00:00:33,534 --> 00:00:36,906
[theme song]
13
00:00:41,368 --> 00:00:44,157
♪ Welcome back ♪
14
00:00:44,240 --> 00:00:47,987
♪ Your dreams
were your ticket out ♪
15
00:00:48,070 --> 00:00:54,903
♪ Welcome back to that same old
place that you laughed about ♪
16
00:00:54,990 --> 00:00:59,346
♪ Well the names have all
changed since you hung around ♪
17
00:00:59,429 --> 00:01:03,959
♪ But those dreams have remained
and they've turned around ♪
18
00:01:04,042 --> 00:01:06,049
♪ Who'd have thought
they'd lead ya ♪
19
00:01:06,132 --> 00:01:07,789
♪ Who'd have thought
they'd lead ya ♪
20
00:01:07,872 --> 00:01:09,917
♪ Back here where we need ya? ♪
21
00:01:10,000 --> 00:01:11,963
♪ Back here where we need ya? ♪
22
00:01:12,046 --> 00:01:16,402
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot 'cause
we've got him on the spot ♪
23
00:01:16,485 --> 00:01:18,535
♪ Welcome back ♪
24
00:01:18,618 --> 00:01:22,974
♪ Welcome back
welcome back welcome back ♪
25
00:01:23,057 --> 00:01:28,628
♪ Welcome back
welcome back welcome back ♪♪
26
00:01:29,585 --> 00:01:32,435
[theme music]
27
00:01:40,901 --> 00:01:42,776
[school bell ringing]
28
00:01:42,859 --> 00:01:44,319
Well...
29
00:01:45,862 --> 00:01:47,322
Good morning!
30
00:01:47,690 --> 00:01:50,895
- Good morning.
- Hello.
31
00:01:50,978 --> 00:01:53,111
Looks like we're in
for a few, uh, late fines
32
00:01:53,141 --> 00:01:55,295
for the class fund today.
33
00:02:01,671 --> 00:02:03,131
Barbarino.
34
00:02:04,491 --> 00:02:06,174
What are you listening to?
35
00:02:06,257 --> 00:02:07,717
The news.
36
00:02:09,477 --> 00:02:12,962
Barbarino,
cough up 25-cents late fine.
37
00:02:13,044 --> 00:02:15,588
What, are you kiddin'? I just
bought this beautiful new radio.
38
00:02:15,627 --> 00:02:17,423
I can't afford that.
39
00:02:17,506 --> 00:02:19,726
Alright.
Write an IOU for 25 cents.
40
00:02:19,809 --> 00:02:22,387
Hey, Mr. Kotter, let's count
the money in the fund.
41
00:02:22,388 --> 00:02:24,814
- Hey, yeah.
- Wait, wait, Washington's late.
42
00:02:24,815 --> 00:02:26,577
Don't you wanna wait
'til your treasurer gets here?
43
00:02:26,577 --> 00:02:29,258
Nah, I know where it's hid.
44
00:02:32,723 --> 00:02:34,405
Some place to keep your money.
45
00:02:34,488 --> 00:02:37,550
Halibut savings and loan.
46
00:02:37,633 --> 00:02:40,941
Nice place to go if you
ever wanna borrow a fin.
47
00:02:41,024 --> 00:02:45,463
Oh, I bet you, we got about
a million dollars in there!
48
00:02:45,507 --> 00:02:48,954
- Oh, sure, a million dollars.
- Or at least eight bucks.
49
00:02:48,954 --> 00:02:50,499
[laughs]
50
00:02:50,934 --> 00:02:54,083
Hey, it's gone! Somebody
ripped off the class fund.
51
00:02:54,166 --> 00:02:55,106
- Hey!
- Wait a minute.
52
00:02:55,106 --> 00:02:56,846
Looks like some Sweathog
53
00:02:56,929 --> 00:03:00,585
made a sweat pig
out of themselves.
54
00:03:00,636 --> 00:03:03,661
Wait a minute. Freddie is the
treasurer. Where is he anyway?
55
00:03:03,744 --> 00:03:05,868
Yeah, where is Freddie?
Have you seen him, Mr. Kotter?
56
00:03:05,925 --> 00:03:07,942
- Where'd he go?
- Alright, sit down.
57
00:03:08,025 --> 00:03:09,829
Just sit down! Come on.
58
00:03:09,912 --> 00:03:13,495
Let's not accuse anybody
just 'cause they aren't here.
59
00:03:19,684 --> 00:03:22,208
Oh. I'm sorry I'm late,
Mr. Kotter.
60
00:03:22,291 --> 00:03:25,695
But I don't wanna leave
my new bike outside.
61
00:03:25,760 --> 00:03:28,618
There's a whole lot of crooks
in this neighborhood.
62
00:03:28,701 --> 00:03:31,024
Yeah, no kiddin', while you was
peddlin' around the neighborhood
63
00:03:31,107 --> 00:03:35,025
the class fund
ain't in the fish no more!
64
00:03:35,108 --> 00:03:36,430
- Ha-ha. So what?
- So what?
65
00:03:36,513 --> 00:03:38,891
You're the treasurer, man.
66
00:03:38,974 --> 00:03:40,616
[whispering] Did you rip us off?
67
00:03:40,699 --> 00:03:41,874
Did I rip us off?
68
00:03:41,904 --> 00:03:44,722
[clamoring]
69
00:03:44,805 --> 00:03:48,156
Oh, wow!
Oh, you guys are somethin' else.
70
00:03:48,219 --> 00:03:50,488
Oh, remember,
you elected me treasurer.
71
00:03:50,571 --> 00:03:53,749
"Let's give the money
to Freddie. We can trust him."
72
00:03:53,832 --> 00:03:56,693
- Now y'all calling me a thief?
- No.
73
00:03:56,776 --> 00:04:00,845
Embezzler is a better word.
74
00:04:00,928 --> 00:04:03,604
- What's the story, Freddie?
- Yeah.
75
00:04:04,847 --> 00:04:07,251
- I got nothin' to say.
- Oh, wow, hey.
76
00:04:07,334 --> 00:04:09,434
Freddie, guy, look.
77
00:04:09,956 --> 00:04:12,260
If you stole the money,
just tell us, you know?
78
00:04:12,343 --> 00:04:16,046
- We'll understand. Sorta...
- Wh...
79
00:04:16,129 --> 00:04:19,252
Wait a minute, wait a minute,
everybody is accusing Freddie
80
00:04:19,335 --> 00:04:22,033
without stopping to think
who else might have done it.
81
00:04:22,100 --> 00:04:23,742
You know something, Mr. Kotter?
82
00:04:23,742 --> 00:04:25,663
The guy who stole that money
must have been, like
83
00:04:25,746 --> 00:04:28,571
really dumb, like, the dumbest
guy in this classroom.
84
00:04:28,591 --> 00:04:30,592
A real idiot.
85
00:04:34,402 --> 00:04:35,861
What money?
86
00:04:36,527 --> 00:04:38,224
Epstein knew
right where the money was hid.
87
00:04:38,308 --> 00:04:39,890
Everybody knew
where the money was hid.
88
00:04:39,910 --> 00:04:40,969
Horshack, how come you knew
89
00:04:41,052 --> 00:04:43,012
exactly how much
was in the fish?
90
00:04:43,095 --> 00:04:47,773
- Yeah.
- And what about you, Vincent?
91
00:04:49,224 --> 00:04:53,777
With your brand-new radio
and your jet-set lifestyle?
92
00:04:53,861 --> 00:04:56,472
Horshack, I got this radio
from you, remember?
93
00:04:56,555 --> 00:04:58,879
Yeah, for six bucks,
which you still owe me.
94
00:04:58,879 --> 00:05:00,621
Well, that proves it then.
I'm broke!
95
00:05:00,641 --> 00:05:02,251
Alright, look,
how about Freddie's bicycle?
96
00:05:02,319 --> 00:05:04,238
[clamoring]
97
00:05:04,321 --> 00:05:08,085
Alright, hold it! Hold it!
98
00:05:09,334 --> 00:05:11,835
Let's stop accusing.
99
00:05:11,918 --> 00:05:13,658
Let's just reconstruct
the events
100
00:05:13,681 --> 00:05:15,803
from the last time
we saw the money.
101
00:05:15,803 --> 00:05:17,621
- Alright. Yeah.
- Yeah, okay. Reconstruct away.
102
00:05:17,622 --> 00:05:22,789
Okay, now,
when the bell rang yesterday
103
00:05:22,873 --> 00:05:26,678
Barbarino was the first one
outside the door as usual.
104
00:05:26,762 --> 00:05:30,666
Yeah, and as usual,
all the girls followed me.
105
00:05:32,674 --> 00:05:35,417
And I left very quickly,
Mr. Kotter.
106
00:05:35,501 --> 00:05:36,820
That's right, Arnold,
I remember that
107
00:05:36,903 --> 00:05:39,683
because, uh,
Epstein was chasing you.
108
00:05:39,767 --> 00:05:43,356
Yeah, yeah. Nobody calls me
sheephead, Arnold.
109
00:05:43,967 --> 00:05:45,630
Okay. That left, uh,
you and Freddie.
110
00:05:45,713 --> 00:05:47,455
That's right.
Freddie and I were alone.
111
00:05:47,476 --> 00:05:50,913
Then I left and I said goodbye
to Freddie, who was...
112
00:05:52,348 --> 00:05:55,003
...standing alone
by the fish tank.
113
00:05:55,086 --> 00:05:56,762
- That's it.
- Hm.
114
00:06:00,290 --> 00:06:02,700
- I ain't no thief.
- Freddie, just put it back!
115
00:06:02,783 --> 00:06:04,966
[clamoring]
116
00:06:05,049 --> 00:06:06,757
Wait! Just-just wait
a minute, alright?
117
00:06:06,839 --> 00:06:08,763
I didn't take anything,
alright? Nothin'.
118
00:06:08,763 --> 00:06:11,635
Look, what you guys are doing to
Freddie is called railroading.
119
00:06:11,688 --> 00:06:13,647
You're convictin' a man
without a trial.
120
00:06:13,731 --> 00:06:14,793
In this country you're innocent
121
00:06:14,793 --> 00:06:16,235
until you're proven guilty,
okay?
122
00:06:16,255 --> 00:06:17,294
Now if you wanna have a trial
123
00:06:17,377 --> 00:06:18,655
we'll have one tomorrow.
124
00:06:18,738 --> 00:06:20,566
Alright, we'll have a trial.
125
00:06:20,622 --> 00:06:22,443
Then we'll convict him.
126
00:06:22,443 --> 00:06:25,163
[school bell ringing]
127
00:06:26,771 --> 00:06:29,407
Hey, what's-what's the matter
with you guys?
128
00:06:29,794 --> 00:06:32,469
You guys call yourselves
my friends, right?
129
00:06:33,159 --> 00:06:35,259
My fellow Sweathogs.
130
00:06:35,443 --> 00:06:38,183
Hey, I'm really sorry, Freddie.
131
00:06:38,267 --> 00:06:39,726
Oh, Arnold...
132
00:06:40,190 --> 00:06:44,912
But that's the price you pay
when you choose a life of crime.
133
00:06:46,779 --> 00:06:47,880
Look, don't worry about it,
Freddie.
134
00:06:47,963 --> 00:06:50,360
I'm gonna be
your defense council.
135
00:06:50,443 --> 00:06:52,787
Oh, thanks, Mr. Kotter.
136
00:06:52,871 --> 00:06:55,210
At least somebody around here
trusts me.
137
00:06:55,294 --> 00:06:58,839
- Hey, I trust you, Freddie.
- Yeah.
138
00:06:59,010 --> 00:07:01,472
[sighs] You didn't take the money,
did you?
139
00:07:03,055 --> 00:07:05,154
No, you didn't.
140
00:07:05,238 --> 00:07:07,417
You did? No.
141
00:07:07,501 --> 00:07:09,133
Did you, Freddie?
142
00:07:18,644 --> 00:07:20,335
Hear ye, hear ye.
143
00:07:20,418 --> 00:07:23,947
Superior court of Sweathog
in and for the State of Buchanan
144
00:07:23,947 --> 00:07:26,755
and begin just as soon
as, uh, Mr. Kotter
145
00:07:26,755 --> 00:07:30,140
and the guilty party
pull up a chair.
146
00:07:46,050 --> 00:07:49,514
I am gonna send your client
so far up the river
147
00:07:49,514 --> 00:07:52,408
he's gonna come back with gills.
148
00:07:53,752 --> 00:07:55,242
Horshack, will you take off
those glasses
149
00:07:55,242 --> 00:07:57,304
and that silly novelty nose?
150
00:07:57,324 --> 00:08:01,887
Ha-ha-ha!
The joke's on you, Mr. Kotter.
151
00:08:05,575 --> 00:08:09,537
I ain't wearing no novelty nose.
152
00:08:09,620 --> 00:08:11,080
Oh.
153
00:08:12,481 --> 00:08:13,972
[gavel bangs]
154
00:08:14,055 --> 00:08:16,497
All rise.
Court is now in session.
155
00:08:16,580 --> 00:08:19,995
The unbearable Vinnie Barbarino
presiding.
156
00:08:23,048 --> 00:08:26,348
Barbarino,
I told you to wear a black robe.
157
00:08:26,431 --> 00:08:30,135
Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Kotter.
I thought you said a bath robe.
158
00:08:32,026 --> 00:08:33,658
[gavel bangs]
159
00:08:34,100 --> 00:08:35,560
Alright.
160
00:08:36,002 --> 00:08:37,738
Now openin' statements will--
161
00:08:37,821 --> 00:08:40,384
Yeah, I got a opening statement.
162
00:08:40,467 --> 00:08:43,578
In the words
of our former president...
163
00:08:44,546 --> 00:08:46,656
..."I am not a crook."
164
00:08:48,471 --> 00:08:49,731
[gavel bangs]
165
00:08:49,814 --> 00:08:50,976
Okay, will the prosecutor
166
00:08:50,996 --> 00:08:53,317
please present his briefs?
167
00:08:53,400 --> 00:08:56,963
Certainly, Your Honor.
Just let me get them out.
168
00:09:03,436 --> 00:09:04,775
Your Honor
169
00:09:04,857 --> 00:09:08,561
ladies and gentlemen of the jury
170
00:09:08,644 --> 00:09:11,527
esteemed losing attorney...
171
00:09:12,442 --> 00:09:14,201
...the guilty defendant.
172
00:09:14,284 --> 00:09:15,512
Objection.
173
00:09:15,595 --> 00:09:16,684
[gavel bangs]
174
00:09:16,767 --> 00:09:18,746
Who asked you?
175
00:09:22,373 --> 00:09:24,272
Thank you, Your Honor.
176
00:09:24,355 --> 00:09:26,777
I intend to prove to this court
177
00:09:26,777 --> 00:09:30,899
that the defendant
Freddie "Boom Boom" Washington
178
00:09:30,982 --> 00:09:35,447
is guilty beyond
a reasonable doubt.
179
00:09:35,447 --> 00:09:38,790
Thank you.
Your turn, Mr. Kotter.
180
00:09:40,546 --> 00:09:45,703
Ladies and gentlemen
of the jury, I have prepared...
181
00:09:48,742 --> 00:09:50,783
...a lengthy defense.
182
00:09:50,866 --> 00:09:53,309
But I'm gonna talk to you
like you're my friends
183
00:09:53,371 --> 00:09:55,471
'cause you are.
184
00:09:55,576 --> 00:09:57,271
[Kotter] Yeah, certainly
it's some hot weather
185
00:09:57,339 --> 00:09:59,120
we've been having lately.
186
00:09:59,203 --> 00:10:01,264
Real scorcher.
187
00:10:03,234 --> 00:10:06,397
I am honored today
to have such a worthy adversary
188
00:10:06,397 --> 00:10:11,260
as the big city lawyer,
Mr. F Lee Horshack.
189
00:10:13,324 --> 00:10:16,845
My task today
will be a simple one
190
00:10:16,928 --> 00:10:21,127
so we can all go home
and enjoy a nice dinner.
191
00:10:22,070 --> 00:10:25,733
I believe
the defendant is innocent.
192
00:10:25,816 --> 00:10:28,123
And like my ol' daddy
used to say
193
00:10:28,206 --> 00:10:31,541
"When you walk
through the cow pasture of facts
194
00:10:31,554 --> 00:10:33,988
you're bound
to step in some truth."
195
00:10:34,071 --> 00:10:36,312
[laughs]
196
00:10:39,429 --> 00:10:42,194
I believe with my heart,
my soul and my conscience
197
00:10:42,194 --> 00:10:44,695
this boy committed no crime.
198
00:10:45,681 --> 00:10:48,009
Thank you for your time.
199
00:10:49,786 --> 00:10:51,349
How am I doing?
200
00:10:51,432 --> 00:10:54,602
You'll be lucky
if they don't send you up, too.
201
00:10:56,751 --> 00:10:59,767
Alright. Will the prosecutor
please present his next witness?
202
00:10:59,850 --> 00:11:02,564
I call Vernajean Williams.
203
00:11:02,585 --> 00:11:05,357
[shouting] Vernajean Williams!
204
00:11:11,641 --> 00:11:13,241
- Ms. Williams.
- Yeah.
205
00:11:13,324 --> 00:11:18,025
That's a very smart outfit
you're wearing today.
206
00:11:18,072 --> 00:11:21,617
Now, yesterday you were seen
talking to Mr. Washington.
207
00:11:21,636 --> 00:11:23,617
Would you please tell the class
208
00:11:23,700 --> 00:11:27,383
the subject
of that conversation?
209
00:11:27,466 --> 00:11:30,250
Well, Boom Boom
was just showin' me a bicycle
210
00:11:30,250 --> 00:11:32,210
that he bought
at a police auction.
211
00:11:32,293 --> 00:11:34,272
For how much?
212
00:11:35,254 --> 00:11:36,236
- Eight dollars.
- Eight dollars!
213
00:11:36,319 --> 00:11:38,419
Eight dollars! Guilty!
214
00:11:39,440 --> 00:11:40,900
Guilty! Guilty!
215
00:11:41,761 --> 00:11:44,416
I'm gonna bury your client
so deep
216
00:11:44,466 --> 00:11:48,404
he's gonna be the treasurer
of Sierra Madre.
217
00:11:48,614 --> 00:11:51,814
[indistinct chatter]
218
00:11:51,897 --> 00:11:55,552
Ms. Williams,
did you ask Mr. Washington
219
00:11:55,602 --> 00:11:58,183
where he got the eight dollars?
220
00:11:58,183 --> 00:12:00,815
- No!
- No further questions!
221
00:12:02,393 --> 00:12:04,355
- Next witness.
- If it please the court...
222
00:12:04,438 --> 00:12:08,660
I would like to call
my surprise witness.
223
00:12:08,743 --> 00:12:10,924
[shouting] Surprise witness!
224
00:12:11,746 --> 00:12:13,390
[shouting] Surprise witness!
225
00:12:13,473 --> 00:12:14,822
Come on, let's get on
with this thing.
226
00:12:14,905 --> 00:12:16,365
- Oh...
- Oh...
227
00:12:18,815 --> 00:12:21,184
Okay, raise your right hand
and repeat after me.
228
00:12:21,184 --> 00:12:24,557
[speaking in foreign language]
229
00:12:26,605 --> 00:12:28,444
What is this? Am I sworn in?
230
00:12:28,527 --> 00:12:32,193
No, but you've just been
bar mitzvahed.Congratulations.
231
00:12:32,193 --> 00:12:34,477
Now you are a man.
232
00:12:37,765 --> 00:12:41,551
Take your hands off me,
sheephead.
233
00:12:41,634 --> 00:12:42,794
You swear to tell the truth,
the whole truth
234
00:12:42,877 --> 00:12:43,997
and nothing but the truth.
235
00:12:44,080 --> 00:12:45,580
Certainly. Washington did it.
236
00:12:45,663 --> 00:12:47,123
Objection!
237
00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:49,209
This witness is hostile.
238
00:12:49,292 --> 00:12:51,392
Thank you, Kotter.
239
00:12:52,038 --> 00:12:56,107
I, uh, I'm glad we're finally
starting to communicate.
240
00:12:57,628 --> 00:12:59,151
Mr. Woodman
241
00:12:59,234 --> 00:13:02,917
you are looking very chipper
this morning.
242
00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:04,982
Please tell the court
what you saw
243
00:13:04,982 --> 00:13:07,884
Washington doing in the halls
yesterday.
244
00:13:07,967 --> 00:13:11,209
- Counting money.
- He was counting money!
245
00:13:11,292 --> 00:13:12,931
And what did you do?
246
00:13:13,014 --> 00:13:15,951
I checked to see
if my wallet was missing.
247
00:13:17,961 --> 00:13:20,362
And how much money did he have?
248
00:13:20,445 --> 00:13:24,208
I don't know, but it was all
in dimes, nickels and quarters.
249
00:13:24,347 --> 00:13:25,551
Oh, no.
250
00:13:25,634 --> 00:13:28,414
It was all in dimes
251
00:13:28,497 --> 00:13:31,460
nickels and quarters.
252
00:13:32,141 --> 00:13:33,553
Your witness, Mr. Kotter.
253
00:13:33,563 --> 00:13:36,455
This is like
taking candy from a baby.
254
00:13:39,383 --> 00:13:42,690
Mr. Woodman, is it?
255
00:13:42,773 --> 00:13:45,754
You know my name, Kotter.
256
00:13:45,957 --> 00:13:48,660
Uh, Mr. Woodman,
are you currently employed here
257
00:13:48,660 --> 00:13:51,000
at Buchanan High School?
258
00:13:51,083 --> 00:13:54,385
No, I'm a jammer
in the roller derby.
259
00:13:56,962 --> 00:13:59,722
Mr. Woodman, you are,
in fact, employed here
260
00:13:59,804 --> 00:14:03,028
and you are employed in
the position of vice principal.
261
00:14:03,028 --> 00:14:05,584
- Isn't that true?
- Yes.
262
00:14:05,611 --> 00:14:09,505
For how long have you been
the vice principal?
263
00:14:10,076 --> 00:14:12,197
Twenty-seven years.
264
00:14:12,678 --> 00:14:16,979
Twenty-seven years, Mr. Woodman.
265
00:14:17,062 --> 00:14:19,605
One step away from the top.
266
00:14:19,605 --> 00:14:24,669
So close, you could almost
touch it, yet so far away.
267
00:14:25,922 --> 00:14:28,084
Frustratin', isn't it?
268
00:14:28,114 --> 00:14:29,572
Yes.
269
00:14:31,429 --> 00:14:35,096
Mr. Woodman, what induced you
to testify here today?
270
00:14:35,179 --> 00:14:37,137
Well now, that's easy, Kotter.
271
00:14:37,142 --> 00:14:39,945
The desire to fulfill my duty
as a citizen
272
00:14:40,028 --> 00:14:41,928
and interest
in seeing justice served
273
00:14:42,011 --> 00:14:45,157
and, last
but certainly not the least
274
00:14:45,157 --> 00:14:49,966
I saw a clean shot
at torpedoing one Sweathog!
275
00:14:52,226 --> 00:14:53,985
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury
276
00:14:54,068 --> 00:14:58,334
I must question the impartiality
and the competency
277
00:14:58,334 --> 00:15:02,164
of this surprise witness.
No further questions.
278
00:15:02,199 --> 00:15:05,540
Well, I think this is a good
experience for your students
279
00:15:05,623 --> 00:15:07,083
uh, Kotter.
280
00:15:07,886 --> 00:15:09,745
In the future
281
00:15:09,828 --> 00:15:13,385
they'll be, uh, spending
a lot of time in court.
282
00:15:13,468 --> 00:15:15,274
[laughs]
283
00:15:16,611 --> 00:15:19,333
Your Honor,
the prosecution rests.
284
00:15:19,416 --> 00:15:20,876
Alright.
285
00:15:21,154 --> 00:15:24,352
Okay, the defense
will now call in its witness.
286
00:15:25,919 --> 00:15:27,722
I only have one witness.
287
00:15:27,805 --> 00:15:31,409
I call to the stand Mr. Freddie
"Boom Boom" Washington.
288
00:15:35,715 --> 00:15:38,720
- Raise your right hand.
- Eh, do not bother.
289
00:15:38,803 --> 00:15:40,905
I ain't got nothin' to say.
290
00:15:43,211 --> 00:15:46,153
Freddie, I'm only gonna ask you
one question.
291
00:15:46,236 --> 00:15:48,520
Did you take the money?
292
00:15:50,210 --> 00:15:52,886
Freddie, say something
in your own defense.
293
00:15:56,256 --> 00:15:59,628
Freddie,
they're gonna find you guilty.
294
00:16:04,365 --> 00:16:05,825
Your witness.
295
00:16:10,812 --> 00:16:16,100
Aren't we quiet this morning,
Mr. Washington?
296
00:16:18,017 --> 00:16:20,175
Now, isn't it true
297
00:16:20,258 --> 00:16:23,660
that when Mr. Kotter
left you in the class
298
00:16:23,743 --> 00:16:27,084
you had an easy opportunity
to get to the money?
299
00:16:27,167 --> 00:16:29,270
Isn't it true
that you did, in fact
300
00:16:29,270 --> 00:16:32,925
willfully and knowingly
steal the money?
301
00:16:33,008 --> 00:16:36,222
Isn't it a fact?
Isn't it a fact?
302
00:16:36,222 --> 00:16:37,557
[coins clattering]
303
00:16:37,640 --> 00:16:39,100
[Horshack] Oh?
304
00:16:39,600 --> 00:16:41,343
Hey, look. I guess
we got our eight bucks back.
305
00:16:41,426 --> 00:16:43,608
- Look at that.
- You better guess again.
306
00:16:43,648 --> 00:16:46,548
Barbarino, there's a lot more
than eight dollars here.
307
00:16:46,631 --> 00:16:48,159
[indistinct chatter]
308
00:16:48,242 --> 00:16:51,658
[theme music]
309
00:16:53,267 --> 00:16:55,420
[theme music]
310
00:16:56,290 --> 00:16:58,325
That's, uh, $32.
311
00:16:58,408 --> 00:17:00,911
Hey, Mr. Kotter
312
00:17:00,994 --> 00:17:03,776
the prosecution
is willing to discuss
313
00:17:03,859 --> 00:17:05,504
a little plea bargaining.
314
00:17:05,587 --> 00:17:08,724
- Hm?
- What are you talking about?
315
00:17:08,807 --> 00:17:11,418
Let's pardon Washington
and you and I split the money
316
00:17:11,431 --> 00:17:12,693
as legal fees.
317
00:17:12,713 --> 00:17:14,375
Mexico awaits.
318
00:17:15,177 --> 00:17:16,780
Horshack,
you cannot pardon somebody
319
00:17:16,780 --> 00:17:19,244
unless you first establish
that they're guilty.
320
00:17:19,263 --> 00:17:22,199
It's a court.
Not the White House.
321
00:17:23,851 --> 00:17:27,920
I wanna find out how
that fish turned $8 into $32.
322
00:17:30,018 --> 00:17:32,061
In an unprecedented move
323
00:17:32,144 --> 00:17:35,277
the defense would like to call
as its next witness
324
00:17:35,313 --> 00:17:38,498
the prosecuting attorney,
F Lee Horshack.
325
00:17:40,488 --> 00:17:42,284
Me, on the stand?
326
00:17:42,367 --> 00:17:45,000
[laughs]
327
00:17:46,511 --> 00:17:48,613
Alright, Horshack, I have
some questions about the $32.
328
00:17:48,696 --> 00:17:52,159
Oh, ladies and gentlemen
of the jury
329
00:17:52,242 --> 00:17:54,219
the defense must be desperate.
330
00:17:54,302 --> 00:17:58,247
Even if I knew anything, you
would never get it out of me.
331
00:17:58,330 --> 00:17:59,678
- Just take the stand.
- I know...
332
00:17:59,694 --> 00:18:01,373
What you're gonna
try and do, Mr. Kotter
333
00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:03,513
you're gonna try
and break me down.
334
00:18:03,596 --> 00:18:06,620
Me? The man of steel?
335
00:18:06,704 --> 00:18:10,006
Well, unless you've got
some kryptonite on you
336
00:18:10,089 --> 00:18:12,188
you'll never weaken me.
337
00:18:12,279 --> 00:18:14,843
I will never crack.
Never, never, never.
338
00:18:14,926 --> 00:18:16,226
You know what I think
about the $32?
339
00:18:16,227 --> 00:18:19,029
I did it! I did it.
340
00:18:19,102 --> 00:18:21,357
[indistinct yelling]
341
00:18:21,440 --> 00:18:24,356
I saw the fish
and I put $8 in his mouth
342
00:18:24,439 --> 00:18:26,761
so that Freddie
wouldn't get into trouble.
343
00:18:26,844 --> 00:18:28,511
Oh, I don't know
what came over me.
344
00:18:28,511 --> 00:18:31,950
Mercy on the court.
Mercy, mercy, mercy.
345
00:18:31,950 --> 00:18:37,134
Alright, the witness is excused!
346
00:18:37,135 --> 00:18:38,415
Thank you.
347
00:18:38,498 --> 00:18:41,565
You finally broke me down.
348
00:18:44,349 --> 00:18:48,417
I don't know how you did it,
but you did it.
349
00:18:49,776 --> 00:18:52,002
Epstein, take the stand.
350
00:18:52,085 --> 00:18:53,304
- Do I gotta?
- That's right.
351
00:18:53,387 --> 00:18:54,607
This court does not recognize
352
00:18:54,690 --> 00:18:56,889
notes from your mother.
353
00:19:00,226 --> 00:19:04,143
Can you throw any light on this
mystery that we're unraveling?
354
00:19:04,226 --> 00:19:05,532
I plead the Eighth Amendment.
355
00:19:05,596 --> 00:19:06,939
That's the Fifth Amendment.
356
00:19:06,959 --> 00:19:09,059
Inflation's hittin' everywhere.
357
00:19:11,106 --> 00:19:13,434
Well, it sure hit our fish.
358
00:19:15,032 --> 00:19:17,294
Did you put money in the fish?
359
00:19:17,378 --> 00:19:19,779
Yeah, yeah, sure. Sure, I did.
360
00:19:19,862 --> 00:19:22,022
I mean, uh, I didn't want
my friend Washington
361
00:19:22,105 --> 00:19:23,715
to take a bum rap, you know?
362
00:19:23,727 --> 00:19:27,169
I mean, I just couldn't see
Freddie walking that last mile.
363
00:19:27,253 --> 00:19:30,887
Walk! The way the money's
comin', he could take a cab!
364
00:19:32,040 --> 00:19:33,659
Alright, you're excused.
365
00:19:33,743 --> 00:19:38,388
I call as the next witness
Judge Vinnie Barbarino.
366
00:19:42,496 --> 00:19:43,815
Did you put money in the fish?
367
00:19:43,898 --> 00:19:47,106
Judge, do I gotta answer
that question?
368
00:19:47,106 --> 00:19:49,826
Tell the witness he's gotta
answer that question.
369
00:19:52,048 --> 00:19:53,508
What?
370
00:19:55,738 --> 00:19:58,908
The question. Did you put
the money in the fish?
371
00:20:01,248 --> 00:20:02,708
Where?
372
00:20:03,949 --> 00:20:05,167
[gavel bangs]
373
00:20:05,251 --> 00:20:07,568
Boy, are you stupid.
You know that?
374
00:20:07,651 --> 00:20:08,974
You're a real idiot.
The question is...
375
00:20:09,057 --> 00:20:12,001
Did you put the money
in the fish?
376
00:20:12,599 --> 00:20:15,887
Yeah. Put me down
for eight bucks, would ye?
377
00:20:15,970 --> 00:20:18,907
I was saving
for my college education.
378
00:20:21,555 --> 00:20:24,981
Mr. Kotter,
well, we all guilty.
379
00:20:25,064 --> 00:20:29,491
Between us,
me and the girls put in $8, too.
380
00:20:29,491 --> 00:20:33,597
Alright. That explains
how the $32 got into the fish.
381
00:20:33,637 --> 00:20:36,978
But it doesn't explain
where the original $8 went.
382
00:20:37,061 --> 00:20:39,303
And we're not going anywhere
till the shadow of guilt
383
00:20:39,386 --> 00:20:42,599
that surrounds my client
is lifted.
384
00:20:42,682 --> 00:20:44,084
Alright. I think
it's time for the verdict.
385
00:20:44,084 --> 00:20:46,129
So I'd like the jury,
the member of the jury
386
00:20:46,207 --> 00:20:47,966
to please come to a decision.
387
00:20:48,050 --> 00:20:50,190
Okay, everybody, follow me.
388
00:20:50,273 --> 00:20:52,915
Take your time about it. You got
a man's future in your hands.
389
00:20:52,998 --> 00:20:55,152
Please, take your time.
390
00:21:01,032 --> 00:21:05,003
Sorry it took so long.
I had a hung jury on my hands.
391
00:21:05,862 --> 00:21:08,006
Alright. Has the jury
come to a decision?
392
00:21:08,090 --> 00:21:09,712
Yeah, Your Honor, we, the jury
393
00:21:09,712 --> 00:21:12,435
find the defendant
guilty as charged.
394
00:21:12,518 --> 00:21:14,258
Alright, uh, w-would you guys
395
00:21:14,301 --> 00:21:17,471
come on up to the bench
and get your sentence?
396
00:21:17,747 --> 00:21:19,207
Come on.
397
00:21:23,678 --> 00:21:26,160
You had a lousy lawyer.
398
00:21:27,524 --> 00:21:29,008
You're really gonna do this,
you're really gonna
399
00:21:29,090 --> 00:21:31,310
convict the man
on circumstantial evidence.
400
00:21:31,375 --> 00:21:34,771
Yeah, but, Mr. Kotter, we all
know that Freddie is guilty.
401
00:21:34,854 --> 00:21:37,357
Is that right?
That's really right?
402
00:21:37,402 --> 00:21:38,500
Well,
maybe you might be interested
403
00:21:38,583 --> 00:21:40,540
in takin' a look at this.
404
00:21:40,540 --> 00:21:42,476
Let me see this.
405
00:21:43,267 --> 00:21:44,367
It's a bank book for $8.
406
00:21:44,450 --> 00:21:48,151
That's right.
Now, what does that name say?
407
00:21:48,234 --> 00:21:49,695
"The Sweethogs."
408
00:21:51,938 --> 00:21:55,239
- "Sweathogs." Sweathogs. Yeah.
- Sweathogs.
409
00:21:55,995 --> 00:21:58,302
- Alright?
- Oh, wow. You mean...
410
00:21:58,386 --> 00:22:00,932
Freddie put our money in a bank?
411
00:22:01,810 --> 00:22:04,773
You know,
you never asked me once
412
00:22:04,794 --> 00:22:06,230
"Freddie, where is the money?"
413
00:22:06,296 --> 00:22:08,956
All you said was,
"Freddie, why did you steal it?"
414
00:22:09,039 --> 00:22:10,902
That's right, if you hadn't
assumed he was guilty
415
00:22:10,902 --> 00:22:12,942
he would have told you where the
money was in the first place.
416
00:22:13,025 --> 00:22:13,825
- Right.
- Freddie...
417
00:22:13,846 --> 00:22:16,283
Why'd you put it
in the bank for?
418
00:22:16,366 --> 00:22:19,829
Because a rubber fish
don't pay 6% interest.
419
00:22:19,830 --> 00:22:21,290
Oh.
420
00:22:21,538 --> 00:22:23,201
Not only were you
ready to believe
421
00:22:23,284 --> 00:22:24,807
that your friend was a thief
422
00:22:24,829 --> 00:22:27,074
but you made things worse
by puttin' money in the fish
423
00:22:27,157 --> 00:22:29,119
and tryin' to cover up
for him.
424
00:22:29,164 --> 00:22:32,427
I think everybody owes Freddie
a big apology
425
00:22:32,482 --> 00:22:35,875
including myself,
because I had my own doubts.
426
00:22:35,958 --> 00:22:39,162
- I'm sorry, Freddie.
- Freddie, I'm real sorry.
427
00:22:39,210 --> 00:22:40,671
- Hey, we're sorry.
- We're sorry.
428
00:22:40,691 --> 00:22:42,773
Hey. Hey, look, look.
Hey, look.
429
00:22:42,774 --> 00:22:43,985
Hey. Forget the apologies.
430
00:22:43,986 --> 00:22:46,162
You know, I probably
would have convicted me, too
431
00:22:46,178 --> 00:22:47,977
under the same circumstances.
432
00:22:48,061 --> 00:22:51,588
So, what are we gonna do
with the $32?
433
00:22:51,588 --> 00:22:53,582
You know what I say, I say
434
00:22:53,666 --> 00:22:55,626
we give it to
Fredrick "Boom Boom" Washington
435
00:22:55,709 --> 00:22:58,152
our class treasurer,
for safekeepin'.
436
00:22:58,235 --> 00:22:59,035
[gavel bangs]
437
00:22:59,035 --> 00:23:01,102
Here, Freddie. Yay, Freddie.
438
00:23:01,186 --> 00:23:03,651
It's alright. Hey,
I tell you what we're gonna do.
439
00:23:03,671 --> 00:23:06,656
We gonna take all this money,
we're gonna put it in the bank.
440
00:23:06,676 --> 00:23:08,775
We gonna all be typhoons.
441
00:23:11,282 --> 00:23:14,488
- That's, uh, tycoons.
- No, typhoons.
442
00:23:14,571 --> 00:23:17,805
'Cause at the end of the year
we're gonna all blow it.
443
00:23:17,806 --> 00:23:21,231
[all cheering]
444
00:23:23,377 --> 00:23:25,836
[theme music]
445
00:23:26,641 --> 00:23:27,442
- Julie.
- What?
446
00:23:27,525 --> 00:23:31,384
Guess what I have in my hands.
No, guess, come on.
447
00:23:31,385 --> 00:23:34,213
Um, a butterfly.
448
00:23:34,296 --> 00:23:35,756
Nope.
449
00:23:36,948 --> 00:23:38,408
A flower.
450
00:23:39,862 --> 00:23:41,185
- No. Guess again.
- Oh...
451
00:23:41,268 --> 00:23:43,909
Gabe, this is stupid!
452
00:23:43,993 --> 00:23:45,332
Alright, alright.
453
00:23:45,416 --> 00:23:48,080
Um, an elephant.
454
00:23:48,882 --> 00:23:50,513
What color?
455
00:23:52,378 --> 00:23:55,794
[theme music]
456
00:24:02,997 --> 00:24:05,760
[theme song]
457
00:24:10,265 --> 00:24:13,011
♪ Welcome back ♪
458
00:24:13,094 --> 00:24:16,797
♪ Your dreams
were your ticket out ♪
459
00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:23,627
♪ Welcome back to that same old
place that you laughed about ♪
460
00:24:23,714 --> 00:24:28,157
♪ Well the names have all
changed since you hung around ♪
461
00:24:28,240 --> 00:24:32,640
♪ But those dreams have remained
and they've turned around ♪
462
00:24:32,723 --> 00:24:34,946
♪ Who'd have thought
they'd lead ya ♪
463
00:24:35,029 --> 00:24:36,470
♪ Who'd have thought
they'd lead ya ♪
464
00:24:36,552 --> 00:24:38,733
♪ Back here where we need ya? ♪
465
00:24:38,816 --> 00:24:40,822
♪ Back here where we need ya? ♪
466
00:24:40,905 --> 00:24:45,043
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot 'cause
we've got him on the spot ♪
467
00:24:45,126 --> 00:24:47,219
♪ Welcome back ♪
468
00:24:47,302 --> 00:24:51,614
♪ Welcome back
welcome back welcome back ♪
469
00:24:51,697 --> 00:24:53,748
♪ Welcome back welcome back ♪
470
00:24:53,831 --> 00:24:55,880
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot ♪
471
00:24:55,963 --> 00:24:58,187
♪ Welcome back welcome back ♪
472
00:24:58,270 --> 00:25:00,276
♪ 'Cause we've got him
on the spot ♪
473
00:25:00,359 --> 00:25:02,451
♪ Welcome back welcome back ♪
474
00:25:02,534 --> 00:25:05,277
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot
'cause we've... ♪♪
35338
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