All language subtitles for The.Adventures.Of.Ozzie.And.Harriet.S03E01.AMZN.WEBRip.DDP2.0.x264-CRFW.en

- "The Adventures of Ozzie
and Harriet," presented by--

- [SINGING] Hotpoint,
Hotpoint, Hotpoint

changes your viewpoint--

[music playing]

--automatically,
because Hotpoint makes

the finest things electrically.

New push button
ranges that you adore.

Refrigerator superstore.

So keep the food
that suits your mood.

Get your wishes, and
wash those dishes.

Everyone knows Hotpoint
is best for clothes,

washes them clean
and dries and smooth.

Your disposition, it
will surely soothe.

Hotpoint brings all this to
you with the Nelson family too.

Ozzie, Harriet, David, Ricky,
"The Ozzie and Harriet Show."

[music playing]

- And now Hotpoint presents
America's favorite family

comedy, "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire
Nelson family.

Here is Ozzie, who plays
the part of Ozzie Nelson.

And of course his lovely wife,
Harriet, as Harriet Nelson.

The older of the Nelson boys,
David, appears as David Nelson.

And his younger brother,
the irrepressible Ricky,

played by Ricky Nelson.

The Nelsons next door
neighbor, Thorny,

is played by Don DeFore.

- Oh, hi.
- Hi.

- You're home early.

- Yeah.

Where have you been, shopping?

- Uh-huh, sort of.

- Come on over here and sit
down for a minute, will you?

There's a little something
I want to talk to you about.

- Is it anything serious?

- Uh, well, that depends
on how you look at it.

- Oh, well, what's on your mind?

- I suppose you know
what day Friday is.

- Sure, I do.

It's our wedding anniversary.
- Yeah.

- I thought that was what
you had on your mind.

At least, I was
hoping you'd remember.

- Well, don't I always remember?

That is, ever since you had
the date tattooed on my chest.

- You keep saying that and
people will believe you.

- Well, as long as you're
so good at guessing

what's on my mind,
maybe you can tell me

what I'm going to give you.

- Yes, I can.

A beautiful, new fall coat.

- No, that's not it.

- Yes, it is.

I just ordered it
from the Emporium.

- It's a fine thing.

Uh, have I thought of any
other little surprises

you'd like to tell me about?

- Let me see...

No, I think I'll leave
the rest of it up to you.

- Fine.
Thank you.

- I'll let you decide where
we're going to have dinner,

and what show
we're going to see,

and where we'll go
dancing afterward.

- Now, Harriet, why
is it I always have

to make all the plans
for this family?

- You know, that's what
I like about you, dear.

You let me make up your mind
and then you stick to it.

- [laughs] Oh, I--

I like anniversaries.

They bring back such
wonderful memories.

You know, it seems
like only yesterday

that we were sitting at
your home on the big sofa,

just as we're sitting
here now, only the sofa

was a little more
comfortable, uh,

more like the couch over there.

Uh, uh, let's sit over on
the couch for a while, dear.

[music playing]

- Well, all right, but I have
to get dinner pretty soon.

- [chuckles] Harriet, don't you
have any romance in your soul?

It's practically
our anniversary.

- [laughs]

- [chuckles] What
are you laughing at?

- Oh, nothing.

I was just thinking,
I always knew

when you were going to kiss me.

You'd look all around and see if
my father was anywhere around.

You know, come to
think of it, you

don't kiss me as
much as you used to.

- Well, of course I do.

- No, you don't, not as much as
you did before we were married.

- Oh-- [chuckles]

- What are you laughing at?

- [laughs] Nothing.

Just a little thing I read
in the paper, a little joke.

- Oh, what was it?

- Oh, well, it was
nothing really.

- Come on, tell me.

- Well-- [laughs] well, uh,
see if you think this is funny.

Uh, this fellow had
this thing in the paper

that a guy said "kissing your
wife after you're married

is like striking
out the pitcher."

[laughs]

- I'm not sure I
think that's funny.

The pitcher's usually the worst
hitter on the team, isn't he?

- Well, no, not necessarily.

- Well, sure he is.

That's why he always bats ninth.

You say kissing your wife is
like striking out the pitcher?

- Oh, no, no, no--

I didn't say this.

This fellow in
the paper said it.

- You laughed at it.

- Well, yeah.

Well, that's where
I made my mistake.

See, I-- I made a mistake.

Evidently, now that
I think it over,

it wasn't intended as a joke.

- What was it?

Uh, it-- well, it's a--

well, uh, see, there's a great
deal of rivalry among pitchers.

So naturally, who
would a pitcher rather

strikeout than anybody
on the other side?

The opposing pitcher.

And-- and-- uh, uh,
who would a man rather

kiss than anybody else's wife?

I-- well, I--

I'd-- I'd much rather
kiss you, dear.

I'm glad I married you.

- I'm glad I married you.

- Going someplace, Pop?

- Oh, oh-- [chuckles] no,
no, why do you ask, Rick?

- Well, I thought you
were kissing Mom goodbye.

- Oh.
[laughter]

No, it was just sort
of an impulsive thing.

- I don't blame you.

Mom always smells so good.

- Well, thank you, dear.

- There's this girl at
school that I especially

would like to dance with.

She always smells
like a vanilla soda.

- Well, there's an
interesting observation.

- I like your perfume
best of all though, Mom.

It reminds me of a marshmallow.

- [laughs] You know, that's
one of the first things that

attracted me to your mother,
that marshmallow overtone.

- Thank you.

Thank both of you.

What was on your mind, Rick?

- It's about a
social engagement.

- What kind of a
social engagement?

- Well, I've been going to an
awful lot of parties recently.

- Yeah, that's for sure.

- Yes, sir.

And there's another
one coming up

that I'd kind of like
to ask you about.

- Well, you can go to as
many parties as you like,

as long as you keep
up on your schoolwork.

- Gee, thanks, Pop.

- Where's this one being given?

- Here.

- Oh.

Well, I don't see why
they can't be arranged.

- Sounds like a good idea to me.

When are you planning
on having it?

- Friday night.

- Oh.

- Oh, well, Friday is our
wedding anniversary, Rick.

Couldn't you make
it some other time?

- Well, gee, I've already
invited all the kids for Friday

night.

- Well, yeah, that's fine,
but your mother and I

are planning to go out
that night and celebrate.

- Well, that's OK.

You don't have to
worry about the party.

David said he'd help me.

- It's not that, Rick.

It's just that if you're
going to give a party here,

I think your father
and I should be home.

- Well, do you really think
that's necessary, Harriet?

I mean, after all,
David will be here,

and he wouldn't let
things get out of hand.

- Heck, no!
David can take care of things.

Have you felt his
muscles lately, Mom?

- Well, OK.

But make sure they're nice kids
and they all behave themselves.

- Oh, gee, thanks, Mom.

Thanks, Pop.

Hey, David!

David!

- I hope we're doing
the right thing.

- Oh, sure.

They'll have a wonderful time.

And so will we.

We'll have dinner in
some quiet little place--

[music playing]

--and go see a show.

- Sit in the balcony?

- Well, where else?

Then we'll go out
dancing together.

You know, Ricky's right.

You do smell like marshmallows.

- Thank you, dear.

You know, you don't pay
me compliments very often.

But when you do,
they're so unusual.

- Hi, Oz.

- Oh, hi, Thorny.

- Hey, where are you
heading in such a big hurry?

- Oh, I'm just going downtown
to get this suit pressed

for Friday night.

- Oh, yes, I
understand it's going

to be quite a big night
in the Nelson household.

- Yeah.

[chuckles] Hey, how'd
you hear about it?

- Ricky told me.

- Oh.

It's our 19th.

Can you imagine that?

- 19th what?

- Well, our 19th wedding
anniversary so we're going down

and go to a show and--
and, uh, dancing.

[car honks]

Eh, what did you think it was?

- [chuckles] I thought you're
talking about Ricky's party.

- Oh, oh-- no.
[chuckles]

- See, our little niece
is here for a few days,

and Ricky invited her to
his party Friday night.

- Oh, gee, that's nice.

- Say, uh--
[car honks]

--what night did you say
your anniversary was?

- Uh, Friday night.

- Oh, you mean, you're going
to make Ricky cancel his party?

- Well, no.

Why should he cancel it?

- Well, if you and
Harriet are going out,

who's going to
chaperone the kids?

- Oh, well, David's going to
be there to make sure nobody

breaks any windows or throws any
furniture into the fireplace.

Well-- well, gee,
Oz, I don't know.

I--

- You don't know what?

- Well, I don't know whether
we should let our niece go

to this party or not.

- Well, are you kidding, Thorny?

- Well, of course not!

Gee, Oz, after all,
I got a certain sense

of responsibility.

Why do you and Harriet
have to go out that night?

- Because it's our anniversary.

Why haven't you
congratulated me?

- OK, OK.

Happy birthday.

- It's not my birthday.

It's our anniversary.

- Yes, yes, yes,
you said that, Oz.

But do you have to
go out that night?

- Well, no, we don't have to.

But we've made plans to go out.

We've been going out
every anniversary

since we've been married.

- Well, if you've been doing
the same thing every year for 18

years, it seems to me it's about
time you got out of the rut.

- Well, you're the
one who's in a rut.

Look, if you're a little
niece is so delicate,

why don't you keep
her home Friday night.

Let her sit in your living
room with a big glass

cage around her.

- Oz, let me make
one last appeal.

Think this over.

Do your duty as a parent
and chaperone the party.

- I'll take it under advisement.

- Be honest with yourself, Oz.

And be honest with those kids.

Remember, honesty
is the best policy.

[starts engine]

- OK, Thorny.

I'll be seeing you.

[music playing]

[uncaps bottle]

I want a chocolate soda
with ice cream, please.

- Hey, Oz--

Oz--

- Oh, hi, Wally.

- Well, don't be so exclusive.

Come on over here and join me.

- It's nice to see you.

- Thank you.

- What brings you to
this neck of the woods?

- Well, I'll tell you, Oz.

I'm on sort of a diet.

And-- and this is the
only place in town

that serves non-fattening
whipped cream with its sundaes.

[laughter]

- Well, good for you.

How's the family?

- Fine, fine.

Oh, say, my Susie's looking
forward to Ricky's party

Friday night.

- Oh, Ricky hasn't told
us who he's invited.

I'm glad to know Susie's
going to be there.

- Yeah, oh, looking
forward to it.

- Good.

- Are you expecting
a big crowd, Oz?

- Well, I really don't know.

You know how kids are nowadays.

Ricky hasn't told
us much about it.

- You mean, you and Harriet
don't know who's coming?

- Well, no, not exactly.

Of course, we know
they're all nice kids.

- Oh, I'm-- I'm sure of that.

[chuckles]

- See, uh, we always believe
in letting the kids handle

their own parties.

- Oh-- sure, sure.

- Well, I imagine the little
Dunkle girl will be there,

probably Doc Williams'
daughters, and then the--

Thorny's little niece
is visiting them,

and then she'll be at the party.

Now, that's if ole stuffed
shirt Thornberry lets her come.

- Stuffed shirt?

Why, I never thought of
Thorny as a stuffed shirt.

- Well, neither did I.
But the funniest thing

happened a little while ago.

He and I were talking
about the party,

and one word led to another.

And the first thing you
know, he practically

told me he wasn't going to
let the little girl come

to the party when I told him
that Harriet and I weren't

going to be there to chaperone.

- You mean, you and Harriet
aren't going to be there?

- Well, no.

Uh, uh, they're all nice kids.

I'm sure they'll
behave themselves.

- Yeah, I know.

But, um, you said you
didn't know who was coming.

- Well, no, not ex--

now, wait a minute.

Don't tell me you're going
to pull a Thornberry on me.

- Um, well, Oz, I--

I don't like to sound
like an old fuddy-duddy,

but you must admit
that it's a little odd.

I mean, turning a bunch of
14-year-olds loose in a house

without any parental
supervision.

- Well, now, wait a minute.

You mean to say you're not
going to let your daughter come

to the party just because
Harriet and I aren't there

to act as policemen?

- Now, Oz, I don't want
to put it that way.

I just-- look, let me
talk it over with my wife

and-- and see what she thinks.

And it'll probably be,
you know-- um, well, I'll

see you later, Oz, eh?

[music playing]

- Oh-- Oz--

Oz--

- Oh, hi, Dunk, how are you?

- Uh, could I have a
word with you, old man?

- Well, sure.
What's on your mind?

- Well, I don't want
to sound presumptuous,

but I understand
Ricky's giving a party.

- Oh, yes.

Did little Mary get
her invitation yet?

- Yes, she did, Oz.

Frankly, my wife and
I are a bit disturbed

about a rumor we
heard this afternoon.

- Oh, when did Thorny
tell you about it?

- Oh, about a half hour ago--

Now, Oz, don't blame Thorny.

Well, you must admit
it is a bit irregular.

- You mean, you don't want your
daughter to come to the party?

- Oh, of course we
want her to come.

- Oh, oh.

- Uh, that is, provided
you and Harriet

decide to stay home, of course.

- Did Thorny also tell you
it was our anniversary?

- Well, yes.

I believe he did mention
something to that effect, Oz.

- Oh, I-- I see.

- Uh, you, uh, do
understand of course?

- Oh, yeah, it's up to you Dunk.

[music playing]

[music playing]

Uh, Harriet--

- Yes, dear?

- You know, I've been
thinking over this situation

about Ricky's
party, and I wonder

if we're doing the right thing.

- You mean, by going
out and leaving

the kids for themselves?

- Uh, yeah.

I mean, how would we feel if we
had a daughter 13 or 14 years

of age, and she were
invited to a party where

the parents weren't even going
to be anywhere in the vicinity?

- Well, Claire
Randolph certainly

feels that way about it.

- Oh, did she phone?

- Mm-hmm, right after
Mrs. Jackson phoned.

- Oh.

- No, it was before
Mrs. Jackson phoned,

but it was right after
Betty Van Schuyler phoned.

- Well, what did
they all have to say?

- Oh, all sorts of things.

Claire wanted to make sure
that her daughter didn't

sit by any open
windows because she

catches cold so easily and--

oh, and Betty Van
Schuyler wanted

to make sure they weren't going
to play any kissing games.

It seems that her daughter just
got new braces on her teeth.

Chubby Jackson's mother didn't
want him to eat any ice cream.

It seems they're trying to
take some weight off of him.

- Oh.

Hey, well, believe it or
not, Dunkle, Wally Dipple,

Doc Williams, even Thorny
all put in big pitches

about our staying home.

- What's this about
you staying home?

- Oh-- uh, hi, son.

Uh, your mother and I have just
been talking over your party.

Would you mind if we sort
of hung around the house

that night and chaperoned?

- Oh, gee, that'd be swell.

- Are you sure?
- Oh, sure.

I was hoping you would, but
I didn't know how to ask you.

- Oh, well, then
it's all settled.

- Oh, that'd be great.
Wait till I tell David.

[music playing]
David!

David!

- Well, tonight's the
big night, eh, son?

- Yes, sir.

- You going to have your dancing
in here or in the dining room?

- I thought I'd have it in here.

I can roll back
the rug a little.

- Do you want me to help you
move some of this furniture?

- No, that's OK, Pop.

I can do it a little later on.

- Well, I'm not busy right now.

I'd be very happy
to give you a hand.

We could have it out
of here in a jiffy.

- No, really, Pop, that's OK.

I got to get some more records.

- I've got the cheese
spread ready for the party.

Here, taste it.

- Oh, gee, Mom, you shouldn't
have gone to all that trouble.

- Oh, it's no trouble, dear.
I was glad to do it.

Here, taste it.

[music playing]

Now, what do you think it needs?

- Maybe you could add a
little strawberry jam.

- Jam?

- Gee, Mom, what do I
know about these things?

I'll fix something
else a little later on.

- Well, this has the makings
of quite a party, hasn't it?

- Uh, yeah.

You know, uh, Ricky doesn't seem
very anxious to have our help.

- No, he doesn't, does he?

He's acting very strange
for a boy who was

so eager to have us stay home.

- Have you seen Ricky?

- Oh, yeah, he just
went out the front door.

- Oh, David, listen,
tell me honestly,

do you think Ricky would
rather have your father

and me stay in the dining
room during the party tonight?

- Well, gee, Mom,
there's a liable

to be an awful lot
of kids in there.

- Oh.

- Well, what about the kitchen?

- Well, you know
Ricky's friends, Pop.

That'll probably be
the most popular place

in the whole house.

- Oh.

- I do have a
suggestion though, Pop.

- Yeah, what's that?

- Well, I know at a lot
of the parties I go to,

the parents stay
up in their room.

- You mean, the--
the parents, uh,

sit up in their room by
themselves while the party goes

on downstairs?

- Yes, sir.

- I'll see you later, Pop.

[music playing]

- You know, I think
this could stand

some more Worcestershire sauce.

- Harriet, this is
our anniversary.

We're not going to spend
it sitting up in our room

by ourselves.

Happy anniversary, dear.

- Same to you.

- Uh, should I light the
fire in the fireplace?

- Oh, that'd be nice.

We don't have any wood up here.

There's some piled out in
back of the garage though.

- Oh, well, never mind.

You have that thin dress on.

You might catch cold going out.

- You sure you like
this cheese spread?

- Oh, oh, yeah.

Uh, I'll-- I'll dig
into that later on.

You-- you wait and see me.

You know, this is
a very pleasant way

to spend an anniversary, just
the two of us alone like this.

- I think it's very enjoyable.

- Oh, yeah.

We've had big
evenings out before.

But this is a lot of fun.

We had a wonderful anniversary
last year, remember?

- I remember we
had a lot of fun.

Where'd we go?

- I don't think I remember.

I-- I remember it
was a lot of fun.

Well, where did we go?

Oh, well, it won't hurt to
stay home for one anniversary.

- No, of course not.

What's the matter?

- I think I heard a couple
more of the kids arriving.

- Oh.

You know, I think we're doing
this in just the right way.

We're here in case the kids need
us, but we're not in the way.

- Besides, they'll probably
invite us down there later on.

- Perhaps.

- Uh, uh, do you think we ought
to be down there now, welcoming

the guests as they come in?

- I talked to Ricky
about it, and he said

he thought it'd look corny.

[music playing]

- They're starting to dance.

I hope they don't knock
over any lamps or anything.

- Oh, I don't think they will.

- Gee, here like this, we might
as well be out having a good

time, not-- not that we
aren't having a good time.

Well, drink up, dear.

There's plenty more.

[sighs]

[sighs] I wonder what those
kids are doing down there.

- Probably dancing.

- No.

I don't hear any music.

I don't hear a thing.

- Do you think there's
anything wrong?

- Well, why don't
we just take a look?

The lights are
all out down here.

- Ricky!

- David!

- Turn on the lights, dear.

- Find the switch.

GROUP: Surprise!
[applause]

- Happy anniversary, Ozzie!

- Happy anniversary!

GROUP: [SINGING] Happy
anniversary, to you!

Happy anniversary, to you!

Happy anniversary,
Ozzie and Harriet!

Happy anniversary, to you!

- Oh.
[applause]

- Congratulations, Oz!

- Oh, thank you.

[chatter]

Oh, thank you.

Oh, what a surprise.

- It's just wonderful.

- What a phony, you with all
this talk about the chaperones

and everything.

[laughter]

- We had to think of something
to keep you two at home.

[laughter]

- OK, well, come on, folks.

Let's leave the newlyweds alone.

After all, these kids have
only been married 19 years.

[laughter]

- I can hardly believe it, Oz.

You don't look a day over 50.

[laughter]

- Well, come on.
Let's dance, everybody.

Everybody, dance.

Come on.

[chatter]

[music playing]

- Oh, boy, how about it?

- Isn't that wonderful?

- I'm weak in the knees.

Let's sit down.

- I just can't get over it.

- Oh, how about this?

Isn't it wonderful to
have friends like this?

Happy anniversary, dear.

- Same to you.

- Gee, just think,
19 years married.

- You make it sound as
though it's been a long time.

- No, actually, it seemed
more like 19 minutes.

- Were you surprised?
- Oh.

[chuckles]
- Oh, we sure were.

- Are you kidding?

You should've seen
your mother's face.

[laughter]

Mine, too.

Whose idea was this, Dave?

- Well, it seemed everybody
thought of it at the same time.

- Oh, gee.

- Do you want to
go to the movies,

or would you rather stay
here with us old folks?

- Oh, gee, Mom, this
is a lot of fun.

I'd kind of like to stay here.

- Oh, you betcha.

- Oh, you're perfectly welcome.

Maybe Rick might
get bored though.

Do you think Rick would
rather go to a show?

- Are you kidding, Pop?

Take a look in the other
room, and see who's

dancing with Mrs. Van Schuyler.

[music playing]

[chatter]

- We had a wonderful time.
- Bye.

- Bye-bye.
- Goodnight, Harriet.

- Goodnight, Doc.
- It was wonderful.

[interposing voices]
- Goodbye.

- Goodbye.

[interposing voices]

- Really wonderful.

- Thanks, a lot.
- Bye, kids.

- Goodnight, Mr. Thornberry.

- Oh, boy, what
a wonderful gang.

[chuckles] They sure had
us fooled, didn't they?

[chuckles]

- Sure was a swell
party, eh, Mom?

- Oh, and how about
this guy, making

believe he was giving a party,
the invitations all sent out.

- Well, that was the truth, Mom.

- What's this?

- Sure, my party's next Friday.
Hey, that reminds me.

- Uh, uh-- hey, wait a minute.
Where are you going?

- Mrs. Van Schuyler's
in the den.

She wants to teach me
some more dance steps.

[music playing]

- Next week, "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire
Nelson family--

Ozzie, Harriet,
David, and Ricky--

will be brought to
you by Antizyme.

Listerine Antizyme toothpaste
stops the major cause

of tooth decay every
minute of every day.

- Well, goodnight, folks.

We'll see you again next week.

- Goodnight.

And remember, Hotpoint changes
your viewpoint automatically.

- That's what I always say, boy.

- What do you always
say, little man?

- Hotpoint changes your
viewpoint automatically.

[chime]

[music playing]

- Lloyd Corrigan played
the part of Wally Dipple.

Frank Cady was seen
as Dr. Williams.

Herb Dunkle was played
by Joseph Kearns.

And June Smaney was seen
as Mrs. Van Schuyler.

This is Verne Smith speaking.