All language subtitles for The.Adventures.Of.Ozzie.And.Harriet.S01E26.AMZN.WEBRip.AAC2.0.x264-WhatsBeyond.en

- Hi, everybody.

I'm Harriet Nelson.

And this is a good
friend of mine.

You know, we Nelsons
have a tough schedule

with a television show and
a radio show every week,

and I found an awfully
good way to avoid colds

is to gargle with Listerine.

Why don't you try it?

[theme song]

Listerine antiseptic,
Listerine toothpaste,

and Prophylactic
toothbrushes present

America's favorite
family comedy,

"The Adventures of
Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire
Nelson family.

Here is Ozzie, who plays
the part of Ozzie Nelson.

And, of course, his lovely
wife Harriet as Harriet Nelson.

The older of the Nelson boys,
David, appears as David Nelson.

And his younger brother,
the irrepressible Ricky,

played by Ricky Nelson.

The Nelson's next-door
neighbor, Thorny,

is played by Don DeFore.

- Did Will Thornberry
call here yet, Mom?

- Not that I know of, dear.

- You're supposed
to pick him up.

- Since when?

- I was talking to him
just before dinner.

- What's this?

You guys are going to go
out some place tonight?

- We're just going over to the
gym to play some basketball.

- Remember now, don't
stay out too late.

- What about your homework?

- Well, there's no
school tomorrow, Pop.

- Oh, yeah, that's right.
- Come on.

Let's go, Rick.

- Hey, wait a minute, you guys.

Put your coats on.

You'll be in there
playing basketball

and come out in the cold
air and catch pneumonia.

- Oh, Mom.
That's old-fashioned stuff.

- Well, maybe it is, but I'm
going to have you catch a cold.

Remember what happened last
year, you were sick in bed.

- Yeah, neat, boy.

No school for two weeks.

- Who are you playing
tonight, Dave?

- It's just a
practice game, Pop.

- Oh.

Well, don't get
home too late now.

- We won't.
- And bundle up good, too.

There are plenty of
colds going around.

- OK, Mom.
Goodnight.

Goodnight

- There are a lot of colds
going around, you know.

- Yeah, sure are.

I had lunch with Herb Dunkle
today, and, boy, he had a pip.

- I hope you didn't
sit too close to him.

- No, no.

I don't catch colds
very easily anyway.

- Well, don't be
too sure about that.

I noticed you didn't eat
very much for dinner.

- Well, I ate all I wanted.

I just wasn't very hungry.

I had quite a big lunch.

- You sure you feel all right?

- Well, of course I do.

What makes you think I don't?

- Your face is a little red.

- Well, it's kind
of warm in here.

- I don't think so.

Let me feel your head.

- Don't be ridiculous.

- I'm not being ridiculous.

You know just as well
as I do that the time

to put a stop to a cold is
when it's just starting.

Why don't you go
upstairs and gargle?

- But I tell you I feel fine.

A little tired perhaps,
but I got up rather

early this morning.

- You just admitted
you feel tired,

and you know very well that's
the way these things start.

Now, why don't you
stop being stubborn

and go over and lie down
on the couch for a while?

[doorbell rings]

- Here, I'll get it.

I promise you I won't
stand in the open doorway.

Oh, hiya, Mary.
Come on in.

- Oh, hello, Ozzie.
Is Harriet in?

- Yeah, sure.
Harriet, it's Mary Dunkle.

- Hi!
- Oh, hello, Mary.

What a pleasant surprise.

- Well, thanks, honey.
- How's Herb?

Ozzie tells me he
has a cold coming on.

- Oh, it's nothing serious, but
it sure is a nuisance for him.

- Well, does he feel OK now?
- Oh, yes.

He's sitting on the
couch with the pillows

all around him, propped up like
a Majaraha or whatever it is.

- Well, I've been telling Ozzie
that's what he ought to do.

Come on.
Sit down.

- Thank you.

- Yeah, Harriet's been trying
to convince me that I feel sick,

but, frankly, I've never
felt better in my life.

- Well, maybe so, but you've got
to watch out for those colds.

Say, I'll tell you
when I stopped by.

I was on my way downtown.

I thought maybe you and Ozzie
would like to go with me.

- Oh, where are you going?

- Well, the stores
are open tonight,

and I have to
exchange a few things.

Herb gave me a
sweater and skirt,

but they turned out
to be the wrong size.

- Well, that's a shame.

Are they too big or too small?

- Well, you know what an
old flatterer Herb is.

The sweater was too big,
and the skirt was too small.

Well, anyway, I'm going down to
the emporium to exchange them.

They're up until 9:00 tonight.

- Oh, say, that
gives me an idea.

Why don't I take that lamp at
those bookends and that shirt

that you don't like down
there and exchange them?

- Oh, Harriet, don't bother
exchanging those things.

They're OK.

- Well, as long as Mary's
going down there anyway.

Besides, the stores don't
mind exchanging things.

They're happy to do it.

- Well, I know, but it's
embarrassing to walk

in and exchange all those
things in one evening.

Why don't you sort of
spread it out a little?

- Oh, I did.

I exchanged several
things last week.

- Boy, I'll bet they're happy
to see you walk in there.

- Oh, don't be silly.
Come on.

You can drive us downtown.

- Well--

- Ozzie, you sound
just like Herb.

- Now, just a second, Harriet.

[coughs] You know, now
that I think of it,

I do have a little
cold coming on.

- Oh, stop your faking.

You said yourself you feel fine.

- Now, now wait a
minute, Harriet.

I didn't say it with
quite that inflection.

If you recall, I said I
feel a little tired, too.

- Then you do feel sick.

- No, no.

I don't feel sick.

I just don't feel quite
up to exchanging--

I mean, uh, to drive you
all the way downtown.

- Well, I was right
the first time.

You have got a cold coming on.
- Oh, no, no.

- Come on.
Here.

Oz, lie down.
- Wait.

What are you doing?

- I've never saw two men more
alike than Ozzie and Herb.

- Mary, would you
hand me that pillow?

- Sure, dear.

- Goodness sakes.

- There.

Now I'll take your shoes off.

- No, no, I can
do that, Harriet.

- [chuckles] Just like Herb.

He's even got a hole in
his sock just like Herb.

- Say, how would you like me
to make you some nice lemonade?

- Oh, say, that would
be kind of a nice idea,

and maybe a plate of cookies.

You could put them
right on the table there

where I wouldn't have
to reach too far.

- Here, Ozzie.

Let me put this
comforter over you.

You might get a little
chilly later on.

- Oh, thank you, Mary.

Ah.

Thank you.

Yes, that is comfortable.

I think this may be the best
thing after all, Harriet.

I feel a cold coming on.

There's no sense
taking any chances.

- You sure you don't
mind my going downtown?

- No, no, no, no.

You go right ahead, dear.

Though, I do think this
is best just for me

to stretch out here and relax.

- Yes, I think so, too.

Are you comfortable now?

- Oh, fine.

- All right, well, the
paper's here on the table,

and so are some magazines.

And I'll go make
the lemonade now.

- Oh, thank you, dear.

Hiya, Pop.

- Oh, hello, fellas.

How was the basketball game?
- Oh, it was swell.

We got way ahead, so
we let Ricky play.

- Yeah, I shot
five baskets, too.

- Well, good for you.

- He got six fouls
called against him, too.

- I couldn't help it.

- You've got to watch
that stuff, Rick.

- They had me guarding
a real tall guy.

He was about a foot
taller than me.

- Did you guard him OK?

- As best I could.

- Heck, he tackled him twice.

- You're not
supposed to do that.

- Yeah, I kept forgetting.

- You're not allowed to
tackle in basketball.

- I kept thinking it
was still football.

- What's wrong, Pop?

Sprain your ankle?

- Oh, no, Dave.

Your mother felt a--

[coughs] felt a
cold coming on me.

She thought I was
catching the cold,

so she suggested I stretch
out on the couch and rest.

- Gee, you're pretty soft.

- Hey, can I have a cookie, Pop?

- Oh, don't take too many.

- Well, there's only one left.

- Come on.

There's plenty more
out in the kitchen.

- OK.

- Don't stay up too
late now, fellas.

Oh, we won't.
We won't.

[door knocking]

- Come on in, Thorny.

- Hi, Oz.

- Hi.

- Well, well, what do we have
here, Lawrence of Arabia?

- No, I just feel a bit
of a cold creeping on.

- Oh, don't be silly, Oz.

I've never seen you look
better in your life.

Hey, what have you got here?
Lemonade?

- Hey, you'd better not drink
out of that glass, Thorny.

There's no use
taking any chances.

- OK, Oz.

I'll go ahead and drink
out of the pitcher.

Nothing high hat about me.

- I just sort of felt
it sneaking up on me.

- Mm, not bad.

A little warm,
perhaps, but not bad.

Oh, I'm sorry, Oz.

What'd you say?

Somebody sneaked up on you?

- Uh, no.

[coughs] I'm just
talking about this cold.

[coughing]

- Well, you look
all right to me.

You don't sound like
you've got a cold.

- Well, I don't actually
have a cold yet.

But any doctor will
tell you if you

feel one coming on,
the best thing to do

is to get right off your feet,
stop everything, get into bed,

and get plenty of rest.

- Yeah, especially if you're
independently wealthy.

- Don't be silly, Thorny.

It's only common sense.

- Look, will you stop stalling
and make up your mind?

Now, are you going with
me tonight or aren't you?

- Going where?

- Oh, now don't tell me
you forgot about our date

for tonight.

- What date is that?

- Our date to go bowling.

- Well, I didn't know we had
a definite date to go bowling.

I thought we just discussed it
casually a couple of weeks ago.

- Oh, now I get it.

Oz, I'm surprised at you.

If you're going to
chicken out, at least

have the courage to
chicken out like a man.

- What do you mean
"chicken out"?

Do you mean to say you'd
actually drag a man out

of a sick bed and take
advantage of his poor health

just to win a couple of measly
pennies at the bowling alleys?

- Come on, get off that couch.

Any man who can get through a
speech like that in one breath

is well enough to
bowl a few games.

- It's very cold out?

- Oz, it's like a
balmy summer evening.

Come on.

You'll probably win
the free ginger ale.

- Ginger ale?
- Well, yeah.

Didn't you know?

They're giving you a
free case of ginger ale

for the high score
each night this week.

- Holy smokes.

I'm sorry I drank
so much lemonade.

- Oh, come on, Oz.

I've got the car right outside.

- Oh, wait a minute.

I just happened to
think of something.

Harriet asked me to drive
her downtown a while ago,

and I turned her down.

What if she comes back here
before we do and finds me gone?

- Well, where'd she go?

- Uh, she and Mary Dunkle
went down to the emporium.

- Oh, be reasonable, Oz.

They'll probably
stay at the emporium

till the door is closed.

Then they'll either
go to a movie

or at least stop and get a soda.

- Well, yeah, we could get down
to Monaghan's roll a few games

and be back before they are.

- That's the spirit, Oz!

Come on.

Let's go.

- You know, Thorny,
it does a guy

good to live a
little dangerously

every once in a while.

- Come on!

Get in your shoes.

- You know, I hate
to admit this,

but, actually, I
don't remember our

making a date to
go bowling tonight.

When did we make it?

- [laughs]

- That's what I
thought, you dog!

"Ozzie and Harriet" will
be back in just a moment.

[music playing]

- Ah!

[laughs] Go ahead,
beat that, old boy.

- That's fantastic.

How do you like that.

Get a load of this.

- I'm sorry, Thorny, old boy.

This just isn't your night.

- There's something wrong.
I don't know what it is.

You've got the juju sign on you.
I don't know what it is.

- Go ahead.
You've got another ball.

- Oh!

- [laughs]

- Oh, I give up, I give up.

- This just isn't
your night, old boy.

- Aww...

- Well, they certainly were nice
about exchanging those things,

weren't they?

- Oh, well, they're very
pleasant down there.

- Although, did you hear
with that one clerk said?

He said, "Madam, do
you realize it's been

three months since Christmas?"

- Oh, well.

- But he said it with a smile.

- Oh, they're very nice.

- Say, how would you
like to go to a movie?

- I don't know, Mary.

I'm just not much in the
mood for a movie tonight.

- Well, I kind of
hate to go home as

long as we're clear downtown.

Say, I've got a wonderful idea.

Some of the girls
are going bowling.

Why don't we go
down to the alley

and have a game with them?

- You know, I'm ashamed
to tell you, Mary,

but I have never
bowled in my life.

- Oh, there's nothing to it.

In fact, the first time I bowled
was the best score I ever made.

- I'll be glad to go
over and sit and watch.

- Oh, don't be silly, honey.

You'll probably beat all of us.

Look, there's nothing to it.

You just take up the ball
and throw it at the pins,

then open your eyes and
see if you hit anything.

- OK, I'm willing to
take a crack at it.

- How about that!

[laughs]

- Will you look at that?

Another strike!

Oh, Oz, you really took me
to the cleaners tonight.

Four games and I
haven't won a one.

How much do I owe you?

- You know darn well how
much you owe me. $0.20.

Come on, let's have it, boy.

- Do you accept a check?

- No, no.

Let's keep this strictly
on a cash basis.

- Oh, you drive a
hard bargain, Oz.

Let me see.

- Pleasure to do
business with you.

- $0.10, 15-- ah!

Give me back that dime.

- What's the matter?

- I'll let you
have the dirty one.

- I'll take it.

You know, I think this is
the highest score I ever

bowled in my life, Thorny.

- Well, when we're not betting
for anything, I always win.

You know, I think there's
a little of the confidence

man in you, Oz.

- Hey, it'd be pretty funny if
I won the case of ginger ale,

wouldn't it?
- The what?

- The case of ginger ale!

You told me yourself they
give a case of ginger ale

to the guy with the
high score each night.

- Oh, yeah, that's right.

- Well, I hate to brag.

- Oh, go on, Oz.

Just this once.

- I rolled some pretty
good games tonight.

- You were pretty
lucky if you ask me.

- What do you mean lucky?

I beat you fair and
square, and you know it.

- Oh, listen, Oz.

When I see a bowling
ball go down the alley,

drop in the left gutter, bounce
out, drop in the right gutter,

bounce out, ricochet
off the pinboy's foot

and knock down 10
pins, that is luck.

- Well, I told you, I gave
it a little extra flick

of the wrist.
- Uh huh.

[WHISPERING] Wait, Oz, Oz!
- Please, please!

I'm trying to add up the score.

- Oz, do my eyes deceive me?
Look.

Look over at the entrance!

- What's the matter?

- I'm sure it's
Harriet and Mary!

- Holy smokes!
You're right, Thorny!

I'm supposed to be
home, sick in bed!

Come on.
Get your stuff.

Keep low.
Sneak out.

- Quick!

- Good morning, young fella.
- Morning.

- This the Nelson residence?
- Yes, sir.

- Got a case of ginger
ale here for you.

- Oh, boy!

Hey, David, this man's got
a case of ginger ale for me!

- Well, I'm not
sure it's for you.

- Didn't you say
it was for Nelson?

- Yeah.

- That's me, all right.

- That's everybody
in this house, dopey.

Who ordered it, sir?

- Nobody ordered it, sonny.

It's sent over courtesy of
Monaghan's Bowling Alley

for a high score last night.

- Hey, nice people, boy.

I can't even bowl, and
they send me a prize.

- It's not you.

It's Pop's.

- Uh, what's going on, boys?

- Oh, this man's got a piece
of ginger ale for us, Pop.

- Ginger ale?
Wait a minute.

Don't tell me it's from
Monaghan's Bowling Alley.

- Yes, sir.
- For a high score last night?

- That's right.
- Well, how about that!

- Congratulations, Pop!

- Oh, gee, thanks.

- I'll get a bottle opener.

- You know, I just said as a
joke to my friend and neighbor,

Mr. Thornberry-- we were
bowling together last night--

I said, wouldn't it be funny if
I won the case of ginger ale,

and by golly, here I won it.

- Congratulations.
I'm glad you did.

- Gee, thanks.

- What was your score, Pop?

- Well, I don't think I know.

You don't happen to know
what my score was, do you?

- No, I don't know
anything about that part.

They just tell me where
to deliver the ginger ale,

and I deliver it.

- Oh, oh, fine.

Well, gee, I'm-- what you'd
call-- just an average bowler,

you know.

But last night,
somehow, the pins

just seemed to drop
down right and left.

I just couldn't seem to miss.

- That's the way
it goes sometimes.

Would you sign
right there, please?

- Oh, yeah, sure thing.

The first time out,
I had to make a split

to pick up my spare.

- Pretty tough shot.

- Yeah.

It's the funniest thing--

I heard about
this, but I'd never

done it before in
my life-- and I

kind of zoomed the ball
a little to the side,

and I hit that left-end pin.

I don't know the
numbers of them, even.

And it just flipped right over,
and got the other corner spin

for the spare.

My neighbor I was telling
you about, he got to laugh,

and he fell back in his chair.

I got to laugh, and I fell
right down on top of him.

- Must have been tough
to see, all right.

Well, did I-- oh,
I gave you a pen.

Sorry.

- Yeah, yeah.

And the next time,
I figured, well,

if I can get a strike following
a spare, I'm in good shape.

So, usually I roll
a pretty fastball.

In fact, I think that's
one of my faults.

I roll a ball too fast.

So this time, I figured
I think I'll just

lay her down gently, you see,
with just a little bit more

right-hand.

So I aimed a little
over to the side,

laid her down, and gave
it just a little bit

of a twist right into the
old groove for a strike.

- That's the thing
to do, all right.

I-- uh, oh, yes.
- Oh!

I'm sorry.

I've been talking
and talking to you.

You probably have lots more
important things to do.

- That's all right.
It's very interesting.

- Oh, well, thanks a lot.

And, gee, thanks for the
ginger ale, thank Mr. Monaghan,

and thank you for being such
a tolerant listener to all

this ear-bending I've
been handing out here.

- That's all right,
that's all right.

It happens every time I
deliver a case of this stuff.

Goodbye.

- Bye.

Here, boys.

Here, cart this out to the
kitchen for me, will you?

- OK, Pop.

- And don't drink all
that ginger ale up

before your mother
gets a whack at it.

- We won't.

[phone ringing]

- Hello?
OZZIE OVER PHONE: Hello, Thorny?

This is Oz.
- Hi, Oz.

What's up?

- I have a little news for
you, a little surprise.

Remember last night
I said, wouldn't it

be funny if I won the case
of ginger ale for high score?

Yeah.

Well, the man delivered
it five minutes ago.

No, honest!

You can ask David and Ricky.

Oh, well, thanks, Thorny.

I just thought I'd
tell you the news.

So long, old pal.

- What did Mr.
Thornberry say, Pop?

- Uh, he still
thinks I'm kidding.

- Who you calling now?

- Uh, Mr. Dunkle.

I just remembered he
sprained his ankle,

and I think I ought to
call up and see how he is.

- That was a couple of
weeks ago, wasn't it, Pop?

- Oh, yes, I know, but it's
still a neighborly thing to do.

Oh, hello, Dunk?

This is Ozzie.

How's the ol' ankle?

Oh, that's good.

Say, now that you're
up and around again,

we'll have to go
bowling some night.

Yeah.

Speaking of bowling, the
funniest thing happened.

Monaghan gives away a case of
ginger ale for the high score

for each night, see.

Hello, Bill?

This is Ozzie.

Yeah.

Say, Harriet and I certainly
got a kick out of that card

you sent us at Christmas.

Oh, well, thanks.

Uh, have you been
bowling lately?

Hello, Larry?

This is Ozzie.

Hello, Tom?

This is Ozzie Nelson.

Ozzie Nelson.

You probably don't remember me.

We went to high school together.

- Oh, hello, dear.

- Hi, Mom.

Want a bottle of ginger ale?

- Ginger ale?

- Yeah, Pop got a
case of it today.

- What's this?

- Well, I might
as well tell you,

you'll find out
soon enough anyway.

The news seems to have
spread all over town.

You know how it is.

You just can't keep a
thing like that secret.

- Yeah, especially with
a telephone in the house.

- Well, tell me more about it.

- Well, uh, last night,
right after you left--

[phone ringing]
Oh, uh, pardon me.

There's the telephone.

Hello?
PHONE OPERATOR: Mr. Nelson?

- Yes?

PHONE OPERATOR: This
is the operator.

- Oh, yes?

- I just talked
to long distance,

and we can't seem to reach Mrs.
George Nelson in Tenafly, New

Jersey.

- Oh, well, no thank you.

Just cancel the call, please.

- All right, sir.

And congratulations on
winning the ginger ale.

- Thank you very much.

- What call did
you have canceled?

- Oh, uh, it's
really not important.

I can make it again tomorrow.

But, listen, you'll
get a kick out of this.

Last night, right after
you and Mary Dunkle left,

Thorny came over and he pleaded
with me to go bowling with him.

- You went bowling last night?

- Yeah.

I didn't want to, but
you know Thorny when he

gets his mind set on something.

- I imagine you put up
quite a struggle, too.

- Well, actually, I didn't.

Oh, which reminds me.

Thorny said he saw you and Mary
Dunkle come into the alleys

last night.

- Yes, he did.

- Well, how come?

- Well, I just figured it
was about time I learned how

to bowl.

- Oh, well, gee.

That's swell, Harriet.

We can go bowling together,
have a lot of fun.

It's not too hard
to learn, you know.

- And so I hear.

- And, uh, if you don't
mind I bragging a little,

you'll be bowling with last
night's high score man.

That's how come we
got the ginger ale.

- For what?

- Well, the man from
Monaghan just brought it over

about a half hour ago.

You see, they give a
prize of a case of ginger

ale to the man who bowls the
high score for each night.

- Well, that's wonderful, dear.

Congratulations.

- Oh, thanks.

I think it's kind
of a nice idea.

You know, they also give
a case of ginger ale

for the lady with a high score.

Who knows?

You may win that some night.

- Do you think so?

- Well, sure.

You never can tell, not right
away, of course, but maybe

in a couple of years
if you keep bowling.

Oh, say, I want to go
and see Gordon Bensfield.

I'll be right back.

- Why don't you just
call him on the phone?

- Well, he doesn't have one.

I'll be right back.

- Hello, Mary?

This is Harriet.

Yes, it was fun, wasn't it?

Oh, well, thanks, Mary, but I'm
sure it's just beginner's luck.

In fact, that's why
I'm calling you.

Whatever you do, don't
tell Ozzie about my winning

the case of ginger ale.

It arrived about an hour
ago, and he thinks he won it.

"Ozzie and Harriet" will
be back in just a moment.

- Hi, Oz.

- Oh, hiya, Thorny.

- I was going to come
over after a while

and have a glass of
ginger ale with a champ.

- Oh, well, uh, I'm glad
you mentioned that, Thorny.

It's been bothering
me a little bit.

- Yeah?

- Uh, you remember last
night we scurried out

of the bowling alley because
Mary Dunkle and Harriet came

in?

- Yeah.

- Well, I understand they bowled
a few games after we left.

And I was just
wondering, you know,

there is a possibility that
this case of ginger ale

was supposed to be for Harriet.

- Well, there's one
way of finding out.

Why don't you call the
bowling alley and see?

- Well, you see.
That's just it.

If I did call them,
I'd find out definitely

whether the case was supposed
to be for Harriet or for me.

Now, the point of it
is I kind of think

that Harriet thinks it was
supposed to be for her.

So it would be such a
terrible disappointment

if I found out for sure if it
were for me, which, of course,

you and I know
that it is for me.

- Yeah.

- It'd be such a terrible
disappointment for Harriet.

I think maybe we best just let
the thing go and status quo--

[mumbling]

- Yeah, well, I can see, Oz,
the workings of the legal mind.

- That's what I kind of figured.

- Maybe you're right.

[ending theme]

An old-fashioned girl
and her toothbrush.

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Next week, "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire
Nelson family--

Ozzie, Harriet,
David, and Ricky--

will be brought to you by
Hotpoint Quality Appliances.

Remember, look to Hotpoint
for the finest first.

- Before we say
good night, I'd like

to show you these
beautiful stars.

The manufacturers of
the Milky Way chocolate

bars recently conducted
a nationwide survey

to select the favorite--

and I tremble as
I say the word--

child actors.

At any rate, we're just
delighted that our own David

and Ricky received
the most votes,

and we're presented with
these beautiful gold stars.

David said--

- Gee, thanks.

This is swell.

- And Ricky said--

- Are you sure
this is solid gold?

NARRATOR: Mary Dunkle was
played by Paula Winslowe.

The delivery man
was Herb Vigran.

Don't forget that a
completely different episode

of "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet"

is heard every Friday
night on radio.

Consult your newspaper for
time and radio station.