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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,338 --> 00:00:06,589 - [all] Surprise! - What the hell? 2 00:00:06,590 --> 00:00:08,883 It's not my birthday. Is it your birthday? 3 00:00:08,884 --> 00:00:12,314 - You don't know my birthday? - It's not her birthday, you dumbasses. 4 00:00:12,680 --> 00:00:14,973 Well, actually, the dumbasses are here 5 00:00:14,974 --> 00:00:16,725 to wish you well at your deposition. 6 00:00:16,726 --> 00:00:18,810 Yeah, we know you're dreading being grilled 7 00:00:18,811 --> 00:00:19,978 about Roseanne's death 8 00:00:19,979 --> 00:00:21,980 by some Big Pharma legal snake. 9 00:00:21,981 --> 00:00:24,567 I want you to take this. This is my lucky bullet. 10 00:00:25,943 --> 00:00:27,527 That's in case you get mad 11 00:00:27,528 --> 00:00:29,612 and you can run over and shove it into somebody. 12 00:00:29,613 --> 00:00:32,407 No, no. This bullet was in my gun 13 00:00:32,408 --> 00:00:34,534 when I was a cop, staring down a suspect 14 00:00:34,535 --> 00:00:37,579 who was holding a hostage at knifepoint, 15 00:00:37,580 --> 00:00:39,706 and I thought, "If I ever shoot this bullet, 16 00:00:39,707 --> 00:00:41,250 I might hit the hostage." 17 00:00:41,251 --> 00:00:44,210 The suspect surrendered and I never had to shoot. 18 00:00:44,211 --> 00:00:48,340 So now, this bullet represents bad things that don't happen. 19 00:00:49,467 --> 00:00:51,817 - Thank you. I appreciate your support. - Mm-hmm. 20 00:00:51,818 --> 00:00:54,929 I am a little afraid that when those guys start pushing me, 21 00:00:54,930 --> 00:00:56,264 - I'm gonna lose my cool. - Aw. 22 00:00:56,265 --> 00:00:57,390 - You got this. - Looking good. 23 00:00:57,391 --> 00:00:58,641 It'll be good. It'll be good. 24 00:00:58,642 --> 00:01:00,311 - [alarm rings] - Uh-oh. 25 00:01:00,895 --> 00:01:03,147 Uh-oh. Yeah. [clears throat] 26 00:01:05,191 --> 00:01:08,109 Well, the synapse bridges have finally collapsed, 27 00:01:08,110 --> 00:01:10,111 and now she's just on random activity. 28 00:01:10,112 --> 00:01:12,615 No, no, no, no. Police physical. 29 00:01:13,073 --> 00:01:14,742 Short blasts for heart rate. 30 00:01:15,242 --> 00:01:17,744 You know, if you don't get on the force, 31 00:01:17,745 --> 00:01:20,206 maybe the insane asylum has a track team. 32 00:01:24,752 --> 00:01:26,377 Sorry Ben wasn't here, guys. 33 00:01:26,378 --> 00:01:28,254 When he gets involved in a project, 34 00:01:28,255 --> 00:01:31,217 he loses track of time, space and things he made vows to. 35 00:01:33,177 --> 00:01:34,928 Yeah, I saw how obsessed he was 36 00:01:34,929 --> 00:01:36,799 during the two hours I worked for him. 37 00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:39,140 Was he like that when you two ran the mug shot magazine? 38 00:01:39,141 --> 00:01:40,684 Yeah, I guess. 39 00:01:40,685 --> 00:01:45,396 Who are you again, and why are you asking me personal questions? 40 00:01:45,397 --> 00:01:47,023 Ben really should've been here. 41 00:01:47,024 --> 00:01:49,860 Even the guy that Harris sexually harassed showed up. 42 00:01:51,237 --> 00:01:53,280 Oh, that's who you are. 43 00:01:53,823 --> 00:01:57,326 Hey. He's not my victim. He's my boyfriend. 44 00:01:57,868 --> 00:01:59,078 [? theme song plays] 45 00:02:18,764 --> 00:02:19,889 [? theme song ends] 46 00:02:19,890 --> 00:02:21,391 [Becky] The Conners is filmed 47 00:02:21,392 --> 00:02:22,725 in front of a live studio audience. 48 00:02:22,726 --> 00:02:24,436 - [screams] - [Neville screams] 49 00:02:25,729 --> 00:02:27,230 What are you doing? 50 00:02:27,231 --> 00:02:29,732 {\an8}Well, one of the tests is clearing obstacles 51 00:02:29,733 --> 00:02:30,900 {\an8}during a foot pursuit. 52 00:02:30,901 --> 00:02:32,652 {\an8}Oh. Well, I I can spot you. 53 00:02:32,653 --> 00:02:35,196 {\an8}Okay, good, because I I've got the angle 54 00:02:35,197 --> 00:02:36,573 {\an8}and the speed of approach, okay? 55 00:02:36,574 --> 00:02:38,624 {\an8}- So, all right, here I come. - Okay. 56 00:02:39,577 --> 00:02:41,203 {\an8}[screams] 57 00:02:41,204 --> 00:02:44,414 {\an8}You know what? It would really help if it felt more realistic. 58 00:02:44,415 --> 00:02:47,250 {\an8}So go get the TV 59 00:02:47,251 --> 00:02:49,335 and pretend like you're running away with it. 60 00:02:49,336 --> 00:02:53,298 {\an8}Oh, I can pretend I have the TV. I I did improv in college. 61 00:02:53,299 --> 00:02:54,675 {\an8}Okay. 62 00:02:57,011 --> 00:02:59,262 {\an8}Ha ha. I'm getting away. 63 00:02:59,263 --> 00:03:00,680 {\an8}Nobody can catch me, 64 00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:03,182 not even against this strong wind. 65 00:03:03,183 --> 00:03:04,935 {\an8}Stop! Police! 66 00:03:04,936 --> 00:03:06,394 {\an8}[screams] 67 00:03:06,395 --> 00:03:07,729 {\an8}I can't do it. 68 00:03:07,730 --> 00:03:09,606 {\an8}I can't I'm gonna look like an idiot 69 00:03:09,607 --> 00:03:11,649 in front of all those cops again. 70 00:03:11,650 --> 00:03:13,611 {\an8}No. Come on. 71 00:03:15,863 --> 00:03:17,530 {\an8}You can do this. 72 00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:19,365 You just need that rush of adrenaline in the moment. 73 00:03:19,366 --> 00:03:21,576 {\an8}They always talk about those mothers 74 00:03:21,577 --> 00:03:23,202 {\an8}who get superhuman strength 75 00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:25,330 and they can lift cars off their babies, 76 00:03:25,331 --> 00:03:27,957 {\an8}but they never tell you about the ones who get it halfway up 77 00:03:27,958 --> 00:03:29,084 and drop it. 78 00:03:29,912 --> 00:03:31,920 I can't do it. 79 00:03:31,921 --> 00:03:33,213 Sure you can. 80 00:03:34,381 --> 00:03:37,467 Oh, no. This TV fell on a baby. 81 00:03:37,468 --> 00:03:38,760 If only someone was here who could help. 82 00:03:38,761 --> 00:03:40,012 [screams] 83 00:03:43,515 --> 00:03:45,309 You are right in here. 84 00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:50,271 - Hi, Dan. - Hi. 85 00:03:50,272 --> 00:03:52,523 I am representing you today. My name is Erica. 86 00:03:52,524 --> 00:03:53,858 Uh, where's Jean? 87 00:03:53,859 --> 00:03:55,068 {\an8}Her car wouldn't start. 88 00:03:55,069 --> 00:03:56,611 {\an8}It's one of those new models, 89 00:03:56,612 --> 00:03:59,323 the you-gotta-blow-under-.08 SUV. 90 00:04:00,407 --> 00:04:01,532 {\an8}Oh, my God. 91 00:04:01,533 --> 00:04:03,076 {\an8}Let me assure you, 92 00:04:03,077 --> 00:04:04,869 {\an8}I reviewed the case and I'm totally prepared. 93 00:04:04,870 --> 00:04:08,081 {\an8}You have the option to postpone, if you'd like, Mr. Conner. 94 00:04:08,082 --> 00:04:10,249 {\an8}Oh, no, sir. Let's do this today. 95 00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:12,878 Tomorrow, I'll drop by for a purely social visit. 96 00:04:12,879 --> 00:04:15,964 Remember, they're trying to trap you 97 00:04:15,965 --> 00:04:18,466 into saying Roseanne's death was her own fault. 98 00:04:18,467 --> 00:04:21,761 Okay, stay calm. Take a beat before you answer. 99 00:04:21,762 --> 00:04:23,555 [breathes deeply] Uh, 100 00:04:23,556 --> 00:04:26,015 I had five cups of coffee and an energy drink 101 00:04:26,016 --> 00:04:28,017 to keep me focused before I came over here, 102 00:04:28,018 --> 00:04:30,520 so if I clutch my chest and fall on the floor, 103 00:04:30,521 --> 00:04:32,451 that's not a response to the question. 104 00:04:35,401 --> 00:04:37,069 Just a few more questions. 105 00:04:37,528 --> 00:04:39,070 It's been seven years. 106 00:04:39,071 --> 00:04:40,697 I'm sure your recollection is somewhat blurry. 107 00:04:40,698 --> 00:04:41,991 No, sir. [sighs] 108 00:04:41,992 --> 00:04:44,367 It's easy to remember someone killing your wife. 109 00:04:44,368 --> 00:04:46,077 Yeah, it's a tragedy. 110 00:04:46,078 --> 00:04:48,204 Is it true that Roseanne had an addictive personality? 111 00:04:48,205 --> 00:04:49,497 No, it's not. 112 00:04:49,498 --> 00:04:51,749 So, no history of overeating? 113 00:04:51,750 --> 00:04:53,918 No, sir. She ate the exact right amount 114 00:04:53,919 --> 00:04:55,059 to maintain her weight. 115 00:04:56,755 --> 00:04:58,464 I understand that she took drugs 116 00:04:58,465 --> 00:05:00,049 that were not prescribed by her doctor. 117 00:05:00,050 --> 00:05:01,176 Is that true? 118 00:05:03,887 --> 00:05:05,973 Yes, she did. Her prescription ran out. 119 00:05:06,598 --> 00:05:10,059 And by that time, she needed more just to keep working, 120 00:05:10,060 --> 00:05:11,728 so she got some from her friends, and- 121 00:05:11,729 --> 00:05:14,230 So you knew that she was taking drugs 122 00:05:14,231 --> 00:05:15,982 that were not prescribed by her doctor 123 00:05:15,983 --> 00:05:17,567 before she overdosed. 124 00:05:17,568 --> 00:05:19,110 [Dan] Yeah. 125 00:05:19,111 --> 00:05:21,029 Yeah, and when I found out, I flushed 'em. 126 00:05:21,030 --> 00:05:23,197 Did you ever search the house after that? 127 00:05:23,198 --> 00:05:25,700 No, sir. She told me those were all the pills, 128 00:05:25,701 --> 00:05:26,827 and I believed her. 129 00:05:26,828 --> 00:05:29,704 You claim to be destroyed by the loss of your wife. 130 00:05:29,705 --> 00:05:31,414 How come you didn't try harder 131 00:05:31,415 --> 00:05:33,958 to keep her from abusing pills that could kill her? 132 00:05:33,959 --> 00:05:35,752 Sir, I did everything I could. 133 00:05:35,753 --> 00:05:38,171 Or maybe you just don't want to take responsibility 134 00:05:38,172 --> 00:05:39,672 for what happened. 135 00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:41,090 If you're saying what I think you're saying, 136 00:05:41,091 --> 00:05:42,425 it might be the last thing you say, 137 00:05:42,426 --> 00:05:43,551 you son of a bitch. 138 00:05:43,552 --> 00:05:45,428 I told her she could overdose. 139 00:05:45,429 --> 00:05:46,888 - [sighs] - So, 140 00:05:46,889 --> 00:05:48,139 Roseanne knew she was doing something 141 00:05:48,140 --> 00:05:49,265 that was potentially deadly 142 00:05:49,266 --> 00:05:51,142 and she did it anyway. 143 00:05:51,143 --> 00:05:53,561 Well, that clearly [chuckling] is not the company's fault. 144 00:05:53,562 --> 00:05:56,147 Yes, it was. It was the fault of the company. 145 00:05:56,148 --> 00:05:59,025 She kept taking those pills because you didn't tell her 146 00:05:59,026 --> 00:06:00,651 that they would change how her brain worked 147 00:06:00,652 --> 00:06:02,154 and turn her into an addict. 148 00:06:02,155 --> 00:06:05,281 You don't care how many families you've destroyed. 149 00:06:05,282 --> 00:06:07,116 The only thing you care about is money. 150 00:06:07,117 --> 00:06:08,868 And I hope everybody that walks through that door 151 00:06:08,869 --> 00:06:10,536 soaks you for everything you've got. 152 00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:13,581 But even if I took every penny you had, 153 00:06:13,582 --> 00:06:14,916 it wouldn't be enough, 154 00:06:14,917 --> 00:06:16,626 because you took the love of my life 155 00:06:16,627 --> 00:06:18,086 and you killed her. 156 00:06:18,087 --> 00:06:19,670 The same as you put a gun to her head. 157 00:06:19,671 --> 00:06:21,964 The only difference is you handed her the gun 158 00:06:21,965 --> 00:06:23,759 and told her it wasn't loaded! 159 00:06:25,511 --> 00:06:27,846 That will be "standing defiantly." 160 00:06:32,309 --> 00:06:34,719 How'd your, uh How'd your dad's deposition go? 161 00:06:34,978 --> 00:06:37,355 Uh, Louise said it was pretty rough. 162 00:06:37,356 --> 00:06:38,815 This whole week has sucked. 163 00:06:38,816 --> 00:06:40,399 Ah. And with Mark gone, 164 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:42,570 the house must feel pretty empty right now. 165 00:06:43,195 --> 00:06:44,363 Thanks, sunshine. 166 00:06:46,698 --> 00:06:49,368 Oh, look who's here, Down and Downer. 167 00:06:51,370 --> 00:06:52,570 Is she having an affair? 168 00:06:53,247 --> 00:06:54,622 Uh, I don't know, honey, 169 00:06:54,623 --> 00:06:57,000 but some men like to punish themselves. 170 00:06:59,378 --> 00:07:01,248 How about we go get tacos for dinner? 171 00:07:02,214 --> 00:07:03,964 Why don't we just order some here? 172 00:07:04,216 --> 00:07:06,386 Uh, because this food is awful. [chuckles] 173 00:07:06,387 --> 00:07:07,885 And we've never actually seen each other 174 00:07:07,886 --> 00:07:10,056 outside these four walls and dim lighting. 175 00:07:10,639 --> 00:07:12,598 I mean, you might be a teenage boy 176 00:07:12,599 --> 00:07:14,810 I've been unwittingly plying with booze. 177 00:07:16,979 --> 00:07:18,855 - Right back at ya. - [chuckles] 178 00:07:18,856 --> 00:07:22,775 Uh, but doing it someplace else would be kind of weird. 179 00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:24,318 I don't know, might be kind of fun. 180 00:07:24,319 --> 00:07:26,655 You know, like a date. 181 00:07:27,322 --> 00:07:28,372 A date? 182 00:07:28,373 --> 00:07:30,741 [stammers] Why would we go on a date? 183 00:07:30,742 --> 00:07:32,535 Because we enjoy each other's company 184 00:07:32,536 --> 00:07:34,913 and our marriages are blowing up. 185 00:07:36,081 --> 00:07:37,131 You're miserable. 186 00:07:37,132 --> 00:07:38,916 That doesn't mean anything. 187 00:07:38,917 --> 00:07:40,727 For me, miserable is just a Tuesday. 188 00:07:41,248 --> 00:07:44,589 Did you ever tell your husband about me? 189 00:07:44,590 --> 00:07:47,091 No. I mean, why would I? You're a friend. 190 00:07:47,092 --> 00:07:48,384 Have you ever had another friend 191 00:07:48,385 --> 00:07:50,255 you didn't tell your husband about? 192 00:07:51,305 --> 00:07:53,306 I did not tell him about the dry cleaner. 193 00:07:53,307 --> 00:07:54,808 He gives me 10% off. 194 00:07:57,728 --> 00:07:58,778 Darlene 195 00:08:00,314 --> 00:08:01,856 Look, I'm sorry. I 196 00:08:01,857 --> 00:08:04,483 I let this become something it shouldn't have. 197 00:08:04,484 --> 00:08:05,819 We have to stop hanging out. 198 00:08:05,820 --> 00:08:09,197 Good, because I think we're getting too close 199 00:08:09,198 --> 00:08:11,248 and I'm not comfortable with it anymore. 200 00:08:12,242 --> 00:08:13,701 Yeah, I'm I'm going. 201 00:08:13,702 --> 00:08:14,995 No, I think you should go. 202 00:08:19,875 --> 00:08:20,925 Okay. 203 00:08:21,376 --> 00:08:22,919 - They just talked. - [sighs] 204 00:08:22,920 --> 00:08:25,510 There's nothing going on unless he follows her out. 205 00:08:26,173 --> 00:08:27,925 And there he goes. 206 00:08:28,967 --> 00:08:30,343 This is horrible. 207 00:08:30,344 --> 00:08:32,012 I have to stop this. 208 00:08:32,471 --> 00:08:33,846 I already tried. 209 00:08:33,847 --> 00:08:35,514 I'll go talk to Ben. 210 00:08:35,515 --> 00:08:37,225 I think there's still time for them to fix this. 211 00:08:37,226 --> 00:08:39,353 [sighs] I I hope so. 212 00:08:39,811 --> 00:08:42,563 I really like Ben. I don't wanna lose him in this family. 213 00:08:42,564 --> 00:08:45,442 Maybe there's a way that he can stay and she can leave. 214 00:08:48,153 --> 00:08:50,530 I declare war. 215 00:08:50,531 --> 00:08:54,283 If you don't start laying some cards down, 216 00:08:54,284 --> 00:08:55,743 this is gonna be a bloodbath. 217 00:08:55,744 --> 00:08:56,870 [sighs] 218 00:08:57,496 --> 00:08:58,996 I'm sorry. Jean promised 219 00:08:58,997 --> 00:09:00,623 she'd watch the deposition for me 220 00:09:00,624 --> 00:09:02,959 - and let me know if I screwed up. - [scoffs] Well 221 00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:05,504 [gasps] Holy cow. 222 00:09:06,088 --> 00:09:08,090 The drug company lawyer called Jean. 223 00:09:08,147 --> 00:09:10,758 They're cutting me a check. 224 00:09:10,759 --> 00:09:13,970 [chuckles] Oh, my God. Dan, you did it. 225 00:09:13,971 --> 00:09:15,471 They're dropping it over tomorrow. 226 00:09:15,472 --> 00:09:17,474 What's this feeling I'm having? 227 00:09:17,475 --> 00:09:20,309 Whatever it is, I don't want to drown it in beer. 228 00:09:20,310 --> 00:09:21,978 [chuckles] It's joy. 229 00:09:21,979 --> 00:09:24,563 Yeah, we gotta celebrate. Joy. 230 00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:26,649 We're gonna toast with the stuff I bought 231 00:09:26,650 --> 00:09:28,901 just in case The Conners ever got a win. 232 00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:30,444 Uh Yeah. 233 00:09:30,445 --> 00:09:32,238 [blows] 234 00:09:32,239 --> 00:09:34,073 - Is '82 a good year for Champell? - [chuckles] 235 00:09:34,074 --> 00:09:35,366 Was there a bad year? 236 00:09:35,367 --> 00:09:36,534 [chuckles] 237 00:09:36,535 --> 00:09:38,996 Dan, I am so proud of you. 238 00:09:39,454 --> 00:09:41,580 You know, Rose is the reason for all this. 239 00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:44,418 I wanna call the kids and we can meet up at the cemetery, 240 00:09:45,627 --> 00:09:47,503 and open the check together. 241 00:09:47,504 --> 00:09:49,213 [Louise] Yeah. [chuckles] 242 00:09:49,214 --> 00:09:51,717 I I'm gonna stay here. It's really a family thing. 243 00:09:52,175 --> 00:09:54,165 Hey, you know you're part of the family. 244 00:09:57,681 --> 00:09:59,348 [sighs] 245 00:09:59,349 --> 00:10:01,879 I know all this talk about her has been rough on you. 246 00:10:01,935 --> 00:10:04,396 Yes, it has been. 247 00:10:05,689 --> 00:10:08,775 But I got past it, um, until today. 248 00:10:10,027 --> 00:10:11,527 Maybe I shouldn't say this, 249 00:10:11,528 --> 00:10:15,324 but when you said she was the love of your life, 250 00:10:15,866 --> 00:10:18,577 it kind of made me wonder what that made me. 251 00:10:19,036 --> 00:10:20,579 [sighs] I did say that. 252 00:10:21,413 --> 00:10:22,955 And I'm admitting it 253 00:10:22,956 --> 00:10:24,540 because I'll never lie to you [inhales sharply] 254 00:10:24,541 --> 00:10:25,917 and it's on video. [sighs] 255 00:10:27,961 --> 00:10:30,671 She was the love of that part of my life, 256 00:10:30,672 --> 00:10:33,382 but when I met you, my life started all over again. 257 00:10:33,383 --> 00:10:38,220 Hmm. But hearing all the stories of you two, it just 258 00:10:38,221 --> 00:10:39,805 You had 40 years together. 259 00:10:39,806 --> 00:10:41,390 It kind of made me feel like 260 00:10:41,391 --> 00:10:44,477 what we'll have pales in comparison. 261 00:10:44,478 --> 00:10:45,937 Not to me, it doesn't. 262 00:10:46,813 --> 00:10:48,481 How many times have I told you 263 00:10:48,482 --> 00:10:51,312 Godfather II is infinitely better than The Godfather? 264 00:10:52,069 --> 00:10:53,402 Oh. 265 00:10:53,403 --> 00:10:55,154 And there's a million incredible things 266 00:10:55,155 --> 00:10:58,325 that we're gonna do that I never did with her. 267 00:10:59,409 --> 00:11:00,459 Like? 268 00:11:01,036 --> 00:11:02,086 Like 269 00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:04,890 You're gonna be around to see me die. 270 00:11:04,915 --> 00:11:06,355 She would've killed for that. 271 00:11:12,255 --> 00:11:13,305 Hey. 272 00:11:13,965 --> 00:11:15,091 We need to talk. 273 00:11:15,092 --> 00:11:16,301 Just for a second though. 274 00:11:16,968 --> 00:11:18,511 I'll go take a quick shower, 275 00:11:18,512 --> 00:11:20,096 and then surprise Darlene at the Lobo for a drink 276 00:11:20,097 --> 00:11:22,014 before I gotta get back to work. 277 00:11:22,015 --> 00:11:24,100 Oh, so, tonight's the night you finally come out of your coma 278 00:11:24,101 --> 00:11:25,726 and remember you have a wife? 279 00:11:25,727 --> 00:11:28,355 I detected a wee bit of judgment in that. 280 00:11:29,106 --> 00:11:31,216 You completely abandoned your marriage. 281 00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:35,069 That's why Darlene is out with her boyfriend, Chad, right now. 282 00:11:35,070 --> 00:11:39,073 [scoffs] What the hell are you talking about? 283 00:11:39,074 --> 00:11:40,866 She's been having drinks with the same guy 284 00:11:40,867 --> 00:11:42,368 every night for the past month. 285 00:11:42,369 --> 00:11:45,579 There is no way she would do that to me. 286 00:11:45,580 --> 00:11:46,914 Wouldn't she? 287 00:11:46,915 --> 00:11:49,292 You didn't text, you didn't call. 288 00:11:49,918 --> 00:11:53,546 My sister leans towards men for attention, 289 00:11:53,547 --> 00:11:56,967 and if you let her lean too far, she lays down under 'em. 290 00:11:59,344 --> 00:12:00,719 Unbelievable. 291 00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:02,931 She's not there. I saw her leave with Chad. 292 00:12:03,390 --> 00:12:05,391 [Darlene] Hello? Anybody home? 293 00:12:05,392 --> 00:12:07,310 Holy hell, she brought him back here. 294 00:12:08,603 --> 00:12:10,938 Oh, you're here. Well, this is perfect. 295 00:12:10,939 --> 00:12:12,606 [sighs] 296 00:12:12,607 --> 00:12:14,837 Nope, he's not here. My bad. Going to bed. Night. 297 00:12:21,491 --> 00:12:23,200 Sit down. We need to talk. 298 00:12:23,201 --> 00:12:24,952 I know about Chad. 299 00:12:24,953 --> 00:12:26,121 Oh, that saves time. 300 00:12:29,791 --> 00:12:31,125 What's going on, Darlene? 301 00:12:31,126 --> 00:12:32,334 Nothing is going on. 302 00:12:32,335 --> 00:12:33,794 I needed a friend to talk to 303 00:12:33,795 --> 00:12:35,713 and he took it for something more. 304 00:12:35,714 --> 00:12:38,675 What did you do to make him think it was something more? 305 00:12:39,217 --> 00:12:41,343 I wore my tightest baggy pants 306 00:12:41,344 --> 00:12:45,014 and my garage-sale T-shirt that says "It's wine o'clock." 307 00:12:45,015 --> 00:12:46,308 That's on me. 308 00:12:47,601 --> 00:12:48,934 We just needed to talk 309 00:12:48,935 --> 00:12:51,605 because both of our partners have abandoned us. 310 00:12:52,189 --> 00:12:53,239 [sighs] 311 00:12:53,240 --> 00:12:55,024 You didn't sleep with him? 312 00:12:55,025 --> 00:12:56,942 God, no. I'm not sleeping with anybody, 313 00:12:56,943 --> 00:12:58,445 not him, not you. 314 00:12:58,446 --> 00:13:00,696 I mean, I guess you can accuse me of sleeping 315 00:13:00,697 --> 00:13:02,491 with Jimmy Kimmel and Guillermo. 316 00:13:05,577 --> 00:13:07,703 I didn't abandon you. I was working. 317 00:13:07,704 --> 00:13:10,206 Okay, you completely dropped out of my life. 318 00:13:10,207 --> 00:13:12,791 And you know what really hurt? Is that it didn't seem to bother you at all. 319 00:13:12,792 --> 00:13:14,502 Of course it did. 320 00:13:14,503 --> 00:13:16,086 Give me a break. 321 00:13:16,087 --> 00:13:17,630 You know what? If Becky hadn't talked to you, 322 00:13:17,631 --> 00:13:20,101 you'd be at work, I'd be sitting here alone again. 323 00:13:20,717 --> 00:13:21,767 You're not wrong. 324 00:13:22,928 --> 00:13:25,038 And I should've told you that I missed you. 325 00:13:25,639 --> 00:13:26,890 Yeah, you should have. 326 00:13:27,766 --> 00:13:28,975 Stupid. 327 00:13:32,604 --> 00:13:34,813 Well, I lost sight of what's important, 328 00:13:34,814 --> 00:13:36,107 so I'm sorry. 329 00:13:36,733 --> 00:13:38,527 I was a lousy partner. 330 00:13:39,486 --> 00:13:40,946 I'm sorry too. 331 00:13:41,404 --> 00:13:43,814 I shouldn't have been hanging out with that guy. 332 00:13:44,241 --> 00:13:47,201 And [sighs] you're a good partner. 333 00:13:47,202 --> 00:13:48,744 I mean, compared to my previous husband, 334 00:13:48,745 --> 00:13:50,080 you're Barack Obama. 335 00:13:52,457 --> 00:13:54,042 If I died tomorrow 336 00:13:55,919 --> 00:13:57,128 would you text this guy? 337 00:13:58,505 --> 00:14:01,095 Why would I text somebody I'm laying next to in bed? 338 00:14:02,509 --> 00:14:03,559 [chuckles] 339 00:14:04,954 --> 00:14:08,430 Dad, it feels like a storm is coming. 340 00:14:08,431 --> 00:14:09,807 Can't we just open the envelope? 341 00:14:09,808 --> 00:14:11,809 No, we have to wait for everyone. 342 00:14:11,810 --> 00:14:13,060 This is too big a moment. 343 00:14:13,061 --> 00:14:15,564 Well, guess what. 344 00:14:16,481 --> 00:14:18,400 [all cheering] Whoa! 345 00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:24,280 When the adrenaline kicked in, all the self-doubt left my body 346 00:14:24,281 --> 00:14:27,033 and I made that obstacle course my bitch. 347 00:14:29,953 --> 00:14:32,204 That's great. You're back on the force, 348 00:14:32,205 --> 00:14:33,289 with a deadly weapon. 349 00:14:33,290 --> 00:14:34,665 Yeah. [chuckles] 350 00:14:34,666 --> 00:14:36,125 [Neville] Yeah. 351 00:14:36,126 --> 00:14:38,116 Well, this is a great day for the family. 352 00:14:38,295 --> 00:14:41,672 Sometimes people like us think, "You don't get a silver lining," 353 00:14:41,673 --> 00:14:44,133 but if you keep on pushing, sometimes you do. 354 00:14:44,134 --> 00:14:45,259 Uh 355 00:14:45,260 --> 00:14:46,700 Hey, can I say something too? 356 00:14:47,554 --> 00:14:50,639 Um, Neville and I had a really crappy homelife. 357 00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:54,393 So it took me a while to to understand why you guys 358 00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:56,563 always wanted to be with each other. 359 00:14:57,147 --> 00:14:58,231 But now I know. 360 00:14:58,857 --> 00:15:00,649 It's because, obviously, 361 00:15:00,650 --> 00:15:05,446 Roseanne did something right for her kids and her husband. 362 00:15:05,447 --> 00:15:07,865 Aw. That was beautiful, Louise. 363 00:15:07,866 --> 00:15:09,325 Yes. Sweet. Now pull out the check 364 00:15:09,326 --> 00:15:11,285 and make it rain, big daddy. 365 00:15:11,286 --> 00:15:12,370 Whoo. 366 00:15:13,663 --> 00:15:15,956 This is from the lawyer for the drug company. 367 00:15:15,957 --> 00:15:17,167 "Dear Mr. Conner, 368 00:15:17,168 --> 00:15:21,003 yesterday the eloquence with which you expressed 369 00:15:21,004 --> 00:15:23,548 the pain of your loss 370 00:15:24,382 --> 00:15:26,551 moved us in a way we didn't expect. 371 00:15:27,802 --> 00:15:30,971 But precedent has shown that any jury would agree 372 00:15:30,972 --> 00:15:33,182 that Mrs. Conner knew the dangers, 373 00:15:33,183 --> 00:15:35,476 yet continued to put her life at risk. 374 00:15:35,477 --> 00:15:38,270 The enclosed check admits no liability, 375 00:15:38,271 --> 00:15:40,022 but is offered as a tribute 376 00:15:40,023 --> 00:15:43,525 to your unwavering commitment to your beloved wife." 377 00:15:43,526 --> 00:15:44,903 How much do they give you? 378 00:15:46,446 --> 00:15:47,496 $700. 379 00:15:49,282 --> 00:15:50,699 The memo says, 380 00:15:50,700 --> 00:15:54,412 "For transportation and miscellaneous." 381 00:15:55,580 --> 00:15:59,130 Well, we always wondered how much a Conner's life is worth, now we know. 382 00:16:02,128 --> 00:16:04,422 $700. [laughs] 383 00:16:16,518 --> 00:16:19,396 Oh. [chuckles] This is so on-brand. 384 00:16:21,481 --> 00:16:22,816 Hey! Screw this! 385 00:16:23,566 --> 00:16:25,235 Let's put this money to good use. 386 00:16:25,236 --> 00:16:27,152 I'll order some food to the house. 387 00:16:27,153 --> 00:16:28,483 - [Louise] Mmm. - [Dan] Mmm. 388 00:16:32,742 --> 00:16:33,792 Hey, Mom. 389 00:16:35,328 --> 00:16:36,663 I'm still sober. 390 00:16:37,664 --> 00:16:38,832 Can you believe it? 391 00:16:40,208 --> 00:16:42,876 And my psychology degree is really paying off. 392 00:16:42,877 --> 00:16:45,880 I got an incredible job. [sniffles] 393 00:16:46,881 --> 00:16:49,800 Oh! [chuckles] And I met a great guy. 394 00:16:49,801 --> 00:16:51,177 A little needy 395 00:16:52,846 --> 00:16:53,896 but great. 396 00:16:58,184 --> 00:16:59,352 [sighs] 397 00:17:01,563 --> 00:17:02,772 Hi. 398 00:17:02,773 --> 00:17:06,650 I tried to do what I thought you would do for the family. 399 00:17:06,651 --> 00:17:07,777 [sniffles] 400 00:17:07,778 --> 00:17:11,488 It's not fair that you were here for the hard part, 401 00:17:11,489 --> 00:17:14,200 and you didn't get to see that things turned out okay. 402 00:17:14,784 --> 00:17:17,078 I mean okay for us, not for regular people. 403 00:17:19,330 --> 00:17:20,957 Mark and Harris are doing great. 404 00:17:21,416 --> 00:17:24,293 And I-I found a guy too, and he's just like Dad. 405 00:17:24,294 --> 00:17:25,920 - [chuckles] - That's Ben. 406 00:17:27,046 --> 00:17:28,381 Hello. 407 00:17:29,966 --> 00:17:31,016 [sniffles] 408 00:17:35,722 --> 00:17:37,097 Hey, Grandma! 409 00:17:37,098 --> 00:17:38,975 Oh, I own your restaurant now. 410 00:17:39,976 --> 00:17:41,186 The food is finally good. 411 00:17:46,816 --> 00:17:49,694 Huh? Right? [chuckles] 412 00:17:51,780 --> 00:17:53,947 I'm really happy now. 413 00:17:53,948 --> 00:17:56,200 I know you didn't think that that was possible, but I figured it out. 414 00:17:56,201 --> 00:17:57,910 Oh, and by the way, I have no idea 415 00:17:57,911 --> 00:17:59,078 where our mother is. 416 00:18:01,039 --> 00:18:02,332 I miss you. 417 00:18:02,333 --> 00:18:06,293 It's a little bit chilly. I'm gonna meet you in the car. 418 00:18:06,294 --> 00:18:07,378 - Okay, honey. - Okay. 419 00:18:12,300 --> 00:18:13,967 Well, Rose, we always said, 420 00:18:13,968 --> 00:18:15,636 "If the kids were still alive at the end of the day, 421 00:18:15,637 --> 00:18:16,971 we did our job." 422 00:18:18,056 --> 00:18:19,557 I think we did better than that. 423 00:18:21,226 --> 00:18:24,116 Makes me realize we did the right thing by not selling 'em. 424 00:18:27,106 --> 00:18:30,596 [inhales sharply] I still can't believe you're not here. [chuckles] 425 00:18:31,402 --> 00:18:34,404 [stammers] I I know you wanted good things for me too, 426 00:18:34,405 --> 00:18:36,515 and that probably didn't include Louise. 427 00:18:37,408 --> 00:18:40,161 But if you meet anybody wherever you are 428 00:18:42,664 --> 00:18:43,748 I'm cool with it. 429 00:18:45,500 --> 00:18:46,918 [thunder rumbling] 430 00:18:50,255 --> 00:18:51,695 Don't hit her with lightning. 431 00:18:54,968 --> 00:18:56,018 Please. 432 00:19:00,932 --> 00:19:02,182 Hey, how you doing? 433 00:19:02,183 --> 00:19:04,059 Oh, honey. I'm doing great. 434 00:19:04,060 --> 00:19:06,520 I guess it would've been nice for that check to be so big 435 00:19:06,521 --> 00:19:08,211 it brought down the damn company. 436 00:19:09,190 --> 00:19:10,607 Very nice. 437 00:19:10,608 --> 00:19:12,318 It was never about the money. 438 00:19:12,861 --> 00:19:14,195 Well yeah. 439 00:19:14,196 --> 00:19:17,364 You know, going through all this 440 00:19:17,365 --> 00:19:21,035 reminds me that no matter how much crap life throws at us, 441 00:19:21,953 --> 00:19:23,496 all we gotta do is look around. 442 00:19:24,163 --> 00:19:27,791 'Cause if we hang together, nothing can stop us. 443 00:19:27,792 --> 00:19:29,126 - [Jackie] Mmm. - Amen, brother. 444 00:19:29,127 --> 00:19:30,294 - [Darlene] Hey! - [Louise] Amen. 445 00:19:30,295 --> 00:19:31,379 Salute. 446 00:19:34,340 --> 00:19:36,675 Well [sighs] Riley and I are gonna head out. 447 00:19:36,676 --> 00:19:38,260 - Us too. - Yeah. 448 00:19:38,261 --> 00:19:40,637 I can't resist a woman in uniform any longer. 449 00:19:40,638 --> 00:19:41,764 [chuckles] 450 00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:45,977 Uh Just make sure you have the keys to the handcuffs. 451 00:19:46,769 --> 00:19:48,396 Learned that the hard way. 452 00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:52,692 Um, I guess we're gonna go too. 453 00:19:54,319 --> 00:19:55,486 Us too. 454 00:19:56,321 --> 00:19:57,655 Uh, well 455 00:19:59,949 --> 00:20:00,999 good night. 456 00:20:02,493 --> 00:20:04,621 [sniffles] Good night. 457 00:20:08,458 --> 00:20:11,085 [sobbing, sighs] Good night. 458 00:20:15,014 --> 00:20:17,925 [Darlene] What is your problem? 459 00:20:17,926 --> 00:20:19,968 You're my problem, you little slob! 460 00:20:19,969 --> 00:20:21,511 You used to be almost normal! 461 00:20:21,512 --> 00:20:22,930 Yeah, until you were born! 462 00:20:22,931 --> 00:20:25,933 - [imitates chirping] - Oh! No, no, no! 463 00:20:25,934 --> 00:20:28,936 But don't you wanna save something like this for when you get married? 464 00:20:28,937 --> 00:20:30,188 - [cries] - Oh. 465 00:20:31,481 --> 00:20:34,859 - [all cheering] - Oh! Touchdown! Yeah! 466 00:20:41,699 --> 00:20:42,749 Good night. 467 00:20:56,297 --> 00:20:57,347 I love you. 468 00:20:59,759 --> 00:21:02,010 I love you too, Daddy. 469 00:21:02,011 --> 00:21:05,347 {\an8}How could you do something that's stupid and immature 470 00:21:05,348 --> 00:21:06,390 {\an8}for me. 471 00:21:06,391 --> 00:21:08,142 {\an8}[chuckles, cries] 472 00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:10,728 {\an8}I'll miss you. 473 00:21:11,813 --> 00:21:12,939 {\an8}Will you call? 474 00:21:13,523 --> 00:21:14,903 {\an8}[chuckles] Promise. 475 00:21:16,234 --> 00:21:17,434 {\an8}I love you, Becky. 476 00:21:19,404 --> 00:21:21,384 {\an8}[clicks tongue] I love, Darlene. 477 00:21:21,385 --> 00:21:24,416 {\an8}Did you ever know that you're my hero? 478 00:21:24,417 --> 00:21:28,967 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 34826

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