Original subtitles

(BIRDSONG)

Whoa!

I didn't mean to startle you, miss.

Is this your land?

Why? You wanna steal it?

Do I look like a whitefella? You know what they say.

"If it talks like a whitefella and walks like a whitefella..."

That's a bit unfair. Fair as a blackfella's bum.

Deadly.

My name's Monty. And I'm pleased to make your acquaintance.

..and of course there'll be hover-cars, jet packs

and a robot butler to help look after you and your young bub.

That's how we'll rebuild, from the ashes, anew.

But better.

Sounds like Eden to me.

(THEME MUSIC)

So, we're at the Sunshine Fun Water Park and Charlie's 15 years old...

17. I was 17. Sure?

Anyway, Charlie spent the day

just flopping around in the kiddy pool like a dugong.

It wasn't until later she was finally convinced...

Pressured. I didn't want to.

..to go to the biggest water slide.

So she goes down the water slide, having a great time.

This is so embarrassing.

But as she gets out of the water,

everyone starts pointing and laughing.

Turns out Charlie left a trail of soggy toilet paper

all the way down the slide.

For some unknown reason... I had a reason.

..Charlie had stuffed her swimsuit bottoms with so much toilet paper

they had to close the Screaming Storm Slide!

I stuffed my swimsuit with toilet paper

because I had a UTI and there was... discharge.

Why did you have a UTI at 15?!

17! And I had a UTI because I'd lost my virginity that trip.

Ahem, well, if we're all talking about losing our virginities,

I... I lost mine when I was 16.

It was 1986. Falco's 'Rock Me Amadeus' was blast...

Why did you even bring this up, Mum?

Well, I was just trying to cheer everyone up.

I don't care about cheering everyone up.

See, that's what Charlie does.

I do what? Kill the vibe.

I'm killing the vibe?

You want to talk about killing the vibe?

You all literally tried to kill me a couple of hours ago.

Oh. We weren't ourselves. We were all high on carbon dioxide.

You can't keep blaming hypoxia for what you did.

Kirby, you recorded it. Show my mother.

Recorded what? What happened in the bunker.

What happened in the bunker? I don't know what happened in the bunker.

You recorded an episode of your podcast about it!

Podcast? (CHUCKLES) I don't have a podcast.

'Agent of Truth'!

'Agent of Truth'?

Never heard of it.

Eden has a way of affecting people.

Eden 2. We're called Eden 2 now.

Well, whatever it's called,

Eden sure has a way of making people go crazy.

Right, Monty? CHARLIE: Mum.

Monty was the only one that stood up for me.

Just Monty.

Why are you here, Marie?

Well, apart from saving all your lives...

..I'm here to rebuild a relationship with Charlie.

(CLICK!)

Mum?

Mum?

Mum! Mum... Shhh.

Shh, shh, shh, shh.

Hey, you scared me. Shh, shh.

Shh. I thought... I thought you'd left.

Of course not, darling.

Why were you creeping around?

Oh! Fresh air. I got a bit lost.

Anyway, back to bed...

(FARTING NOISE)

Smells like someone got a fright.

I get gassy when I'm scared, remember?

Ever since I was a kid.

Actually, it hasn't happened since I was a kid.

No need to be scared. Everything's going to be OK.

Mum's here now.

(SIREN WAILS)

Not the box! Not the box!

What? What box?

(SIREN CONTINUES)

Nothing. Just that siren.

Who amongst you know what day it is?

(KELLY YAWNS)

Today is the first semi-inaugural

Eden 2 Blackfulla Royale!

There will come a time in the future

when you will need to pick up weapons

and use it against another human being -

or what was once a human being.

Can I get a "Go the mob"?

Guy, you like carnage, eh? Boom!

(MONTY LAUGHS) (PROJECTILE WHISTLES, THEN LANDS)

It doesn't take three semesters

of Cert III Holistic Conflict Resolution

at the Byron Bay Wellness Centre

to intuit there's unresolved tension in this group.

Mum, what are you doing?

Darling, I'm suggesting instead of Monty's silly ideas,

we work on ourselves.

I think what we all need is therapy.

Are you ready to heal? PREPPERS: Yes!

I said, are you ready to heal?! Yes!

No!

What? My feelings are my IP. Plus, I don't believe in therapy.

Welcome to our healing place,

a place of emotional honesty.

I'll go first.

Charlie, join me?

Maybe someone else should go first.

Don't do it, Charlie.

JAYDEN: Charlie, Marie carried you

in her beautiful black womb for nine months.

Go to her. Or I will.

Charlie...

..my daughter...

..I'm here... to tell you that...

..that I'm sick.

What? The big C.

Colonisation? Chemtrails.

Curried sausages! Chlamydia.

Christ on a cross, it's cancer! She has cancer.

Cancer? Oh, my God.

I know you tried to contact me on Invasion Day

and I wasn't there when you needed me.

Forgive me? Of course, Mum.

You don't have to be sorry, you're sick. Um...

How far along is it? Are you getting treatment?

We'll deal with the details later,

but I'm in good hands at Saint Dominic de Guzman Therapy Centre.

Charlie, can I ask you a favour? Of course.

Would it be OK if we hugged?

It feels so good to hug...

..to nurture closeness.

I can feel our auras... OK, Mum.

You're so brave, Aunt. If anyone's brave, it's you, Graham.

Jayden.

Jalen - giving up the best years of your life

instead of doing fun young adult things.

(CHUCKLES)

Would anyone like to share next?

I guess I would. Be seen and tell your truth.

Hi. I'm Guy.

I'm an apocalypatoholic.

Hi, Guy. PREPPERS: Hi, Guy.

Until yesterday, all I ever wanted to do

was lay waste to the zombie hordes.

But after the last few weeks, I... I...

It's OK, Guy, you're in a safe place.

Maybe I should go back to... selling vacuums.

Maybe this isn't for me. Nah, don't say that!

You were born to slay the undead in a post-apocalyptic hellscape!

Monty, please. Oh, you...

Guy's dealing with the toxic colonial heteronormative ideas

of masculinity in a violent, fictional future.

(LAUGHS) If anything, this is a breakthrough!

(APPLAUSE)

(SOBS)

Eye-gazing.

It's about fostering intimacy.

All you have to do is stare without breaking eye contact.

(INHALES)

I've missed this. These moments.

Mum, we've literally never done anything like this before.

Charlie, this is a non-verbal exercise.

You started it. Did not.

(INHALES) And... breathe.

(ALL INHALE, THEN EXHALE)

Are you looking at me, Kirby? Of course.

You're looking past me. Definitely not.

Look at me!

MARIE: OK, maybe this is a little intense.

Next, you should bring your partner clos... er...

..and hug.

Ugh! Ahh! MARIE: What's wrong?

KELLY: You should tell her, Lionel.

Juggling our intense desire for physical intimacy

with our spiritual pledge

is proving really, really, really hard.

KELLY: While in the bunker, we almost committed a murder because of it.

(INHALES DEEPLY)

We don't need any more temptation.

Well, you're in luck.

As someone who has convened a Tantric abstinence retreat in Noosa,

I think I can tailor an activity just for you.

Sit this one out...

..at an appropriate, non-arousing distance.

KELLY: Thank you, Marie. (CHUCKLES)

Everyone, hold your hugs.

I'll be back. Nature calls.

Ohhh! Poppy! Poppy! (SOBS)

Why didn't you take your medicine? They warned you about your leg!

And then they warned you again about your other leg. Why?!

Jayden, Jayden!

Jayden, stop! I'm not your dead pop!

This is weird. What's wrong?

Promise you won't laugh? I promise.

I...

I never learnt how to hug.

(LAUGHS)

You promised!

(GROANS)

(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)

(IMITATES BIRD CALLS)

(CHARLIE MAKES BIRD CALL)

(MAKES BIRD CALLS)

(CHARLIE MAKES MORE BIRD CALLS)

(MAKES BIRD CALL)

Charlie, what are you doing? Uh, nothing.

(FARTING SOUND) What's that smell?

CHARLIE: "I get gassy when I'm scared, remember?"

Whoever smelt it dealt it. Oh, no, that's not right.

Whoever denied it supplied it. Everyone knows that.

Busted. Yeah.

(DOOR OPENS)

Thanks, darling. I didn't think you had the nerve. I'm proud of you.

I want answers. What are you doing? What are you planning?

I don't know how to tell you this, but...

..we're living on stolen land.

Yeah, since 1788. Jayden won't stop talking about it.

No, I mean, this land was stolen from us

by that lying old man.

Flashback with me.

(MYSTICAL MUSIC)

(HUMS)

(CONTINUES HUMMING)

(HUMMING INTENSITY INCREASES)

(GASPS)

Can you see what I see through your own mind's eye?

See what?

The past, Charlie. My past.

Um, no?

(MYSTICAL MUSIC STOPS)

OK. Maybe it'll help if I narrate a little?

(MYSTICAL MUSIC RESUMES)

I was just a kid when it all began. (SIREN WAILS)

Quick! Quick! Up you get. Time to hide! The saucer men are here!

(GROWLS) Quick, they're coming.

You have to hide, Marie. I don't want to.

Just do as we practised. But it's dark in there.

(GROWLS)

Please.

What's worse, Marie, the saucer men, or the dark?

But there's no saucer men, Mum. I know it's Uncle Monty.

You do?

(SIGHS) You're right, Marie, there are no saucer men.

But we still need to be prepared, because there's something worse.

What's worse? Gunjies.

Gunjies? Policemen, Marie.

White government men who will take you from me.

Why would they take me away?

Because they want to take what we have and they want us to disappear.

That's why they take children like you from their families.

Now, do as Mum says and hide. Please. Not anymore.

It's for the best, I promise.

Good girl.

(MYSTICAL MUSIC FADES)

I don't want you to be that terrified girl in a box,

petrified every night the world would end.

So I made a deal with Nan -

no prepping around you, ever.

I'm so sorry, Mum.

Charlie, you don't need Eden 2. You could come home with me.

I don't even know where you live.

Um, I'm between wellness retreats,

but we could make our home wherever we want to make it.

You don't understand.

I've lost everything. I'm stuck here.

What about the land?

You want me to sell the land? Exactly.

Sell the land. Start anew.

Go on, Charlie.

Tear it up.

Tear up the 10,000-year lease.

I need to think about it.

Of course. (CHUCKLES) It's a big decision.

(BIRDSONG)

As you can see, Kelly and Lionel are under a deep, deep hypnosis.

What is this, some kind of mind control?

Exactly.

A long time ago I was fortunate enough

to join an astral travel retreat in Mullumbimby.

You astral-travelled to Mullumbimby?

No, I caught a bus. But that's not the point.

Lionel and Kelly have projected themselves

beyond the confines of the physical onto the astral plane.

('I FEEL LOVE' BY DONNA SUMMER PLAYS)

Where am I?

Lionel! Is that you?

Kelly. I can't feel my body.

Marie? Oh!

I told you I had something special in mind for you two.

Whoa.

Here, on the astral plane, you're separated from your bodies.

With no bodies, you're free from the rules governing sin.

Awesome.

It's the astral plane. A place of yes.

Yes!

Yes.

Yes.

(KELLY AND LIONEL MOAN PASSIONATELY)

Another breakthrough!

Lunchtime!

(KELLY AND LIONEL MOAN)

What are you eating?

Spoiled REMs. My God.

I remember when Monty got those. All chemicals.

Our bodies need natural fuel.

That's why I'm supplementing my Western medical care

with essential oils, and BioCharger.

And this - a juice system.

A juice system?

I'm making real good money with my downline distributors.

You seem like a smart kid. You ever thought about being your own boss?

Is this the Saint Dominic de Guzman Therapy Centre?

I'd like the room number for Marie Smallwood.

I want to send her some flowers. I know she'd appreciate them.

(MUSIC PLAYS SOFTLY)

And what does little Kirby see when she opens her bedroom door?

Nothing.

Do you mean...

..your bedroom was empty, or void of emotional warmth?

Neither.

Come on, Kirby. Engage.

It's OK to open up to the memories you had as a child.

No. I'm sceptical of this regressive memory therapy.

Haven't you heard of the satanic panic of the 1980s?

No.

'Agent of Truth', episode 124. It's a classic.

I prosecuted the pseudo-therapy led by big psych,

resulting in thousands of false accusations in ritual satanic abuse.

'Agent of Truth'? Mm-hm.

I thought you said you didn't have a podcast.

Uh...

Damn you, Mrs Smallwood!

Another breakthrough.

(APPLAUSE)

Charlie, with all the breakthroughs we've had today,

is there something you'd like to do?

It's time to move on,

to put the past behind you, to put this behind you.

My black queens!

Leave with me, Charlie.

It's time to say goodbye to preppers, to Eden 2.

It's time to destroy the 10,000-year lease.

Wait. What the fuck?! Go on.

MONTY: Stop!

Marie is a fraud!

Monty! This is a circle of healing!

A circle of lies!

What's going on, Monty?

That de Guzman hospital hasn't ever heard of her.

No. I'm being treated as an outpatient. I don't have a room.

Mum, you... lied about having cancer?

She did! And I have the smoking gun to prove that it was fraud.

Doxycycline!

Doxycycline! That's what they use to treat chlamydia! I knew it!

I believed in the black matriarchy. I trusted you as an upline mentor.

This doesn't even taste good!

(BOTTLE SMASHES)

So it is true?

Yes, the juice is...

..a... pyramid scheme.

No, not that - the cancer! Oh.

Well, technically I didn't say, "I have cancer."

I said I had "the big C".

The truth is, after Invasion Day,

I was afraid you wouldn't want to see me.

Wait a minute.

If Marie lied about having cancer, what else has she lied about?

Did you lie about intimacy in the astral plane?

LIONEL: We trusted you.

I knew therapy was a crock.

(BIRD CAWS)

Pick a side, Charlie. (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)

Be honest, Mum, did you only come here

to convince me to sell the land?

It's not that simple.

Monty's the one scamming people.

I never forced prepping on anyone. Your mum liked it here.

Mum was stolen as a child

and she didn't want the same to happen to me.

And you took advantage of that!

Your mum believed in the Eden project! All of them!

You're ripping these people off. You're a con man!

You ruined my life, but I'm not gonna let you ruin my daughter's!

OK, listen to me, all of you.

Maybe Mum lied, but allowing someone whose only qualification

is a week at a Yamba day spa to lead therapy was a mistake.

And I am just as angry as you.

But I don't want to be stuck here! Do you?

Is Eden 2 really going to save us,

or is it just stopping us from living our lives?

BOTH: Ahhh!

GUY: Monty! Monty! Wait for me, I'm coming!

(MARIE PANTS)

I only wanted what was best for you.

No, you don't. You always do what's best for you.

What the fuck does that mean? Run, fuck ya!

(PROJECTILE WHISTLING)

You think we lost them? Yeah, for a bit.

But we can't hide forever. Quick, pass me my bag.

You're running away again.

You were never there when I needed you. Just like Invasion Day.

Flashback with me, Mum.

Mum. It's me.

Um, I need you.

I need you just this one time. Please.

Please pick up the phone.

I don't have anywhere to go and I need your help.

(SOBS)

Mum, I don't want to be alone.

Please answer.

You never answered.

You're never there when I need you. Ever!

I'm sorry! I am!

Monty may have ruined your family.

But you ruined ours.

Yeah. You're right.

KELLY: I saw them go this way. GUY: Shut your hole.

Come on. Stop talking.

(ZIPPER UNZIPS)

It's Marie that we want. Step aside, Charlie.

Do it, Charlie. They need to heal.

Maybe it's the only therapy they know.

And... I deserve it.

What are you waiting for, you sons of bitches? Do it!

Light her up!

(EMOTIONAL MUSIC)

(MUSIC STOPS)

That's all? Feel better now?

Hmm. Another breakthrough.

Ironic, isn't it?

The first annual Eden 2 Blackfulla Royale was all we needed to heal.

Can I get a "Go the mob"? PREPPERS: Go the mob!

Charlie, I owe you an apology.

Why?

You were right.

No. Look, the land is yours. You can do whatever you like with it.

Your nan and I created Eden to give us hope,

and that's what she would've wanted for you too, Charlie.

But you and Nan, you hid all of this for so many years.

Listen, your mum was right to be mad.

And she was also right to be cutting that deal with Nan.

But I wasn't lying, Charlie, when I told you

Nan's heart broke when Marie left.

Why?

(SIREN WAILS)

For years we continued to train and prepare, until one night...

Wake up.

..when Marie was 16 years old.

Time to hide.

Marie? Baby?

Marie was 16 when she ran away.

Nan was so afraid of Marie being taken that she scared her away.

That's what trauma does.

(NAN SOBS)

MARIE: "There's a saying that if you don't know your past,

"you can't see your future.

"I've been running away from my past my entire life.

"Sometimes I feel like the entire history of our people

"is held in each of our hearts.

"I thought being a mother would make the world clearer for me,

"but it didn't.

"I always felt like I let you down

"because I couldn't give my daughter any hope in the world

"because I had none either.

"So I ran. I always run.

"I often wonder what would've happened

"if I was brave enough to face the past and fight for a future.

"Maybe neither of us would feel so alone in the world.

"You don't have hope, Charlie, you create it.

"The world might end, but it ends every day.

"So fight every day, Charlie. Have hope.

"Don't run. Love, Mum.

"PS. Have you ever thought about being your own boss?

"Trust me, this opportunity definitely isn't a pyramid scheme."