All language subtitles for Hawaii.Five-0.2010.S09E22.HDTV.x264-KILLERS[ettv]-eng

[♪ ♪]

You get it?

Here.
Now make the call.

Get in.

That wasn't the deal.

The deal's changed.

Get in the car,

or your friend is dead.

(engine starts)

Go.

(Hawaii Five-O
theme song playing)

*HAWAII FIVE-O*
Season 09 Episode 22

Episode Title:
"O ke kumu, o ka mana, ho'opuka 'ia"

Captioned by Media Access
Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org

Sync corrections by srjanapala

♪ I'm just a man ♪

♪ An ordinary man... ♪

TANI:
Damn, Joons.

Your dad had it going on.

Thanks.
Yeah, it's not at all weird

to hear you crushing on my dad.

Crushing?
No. I'm just

wondering how you could possibly
share DNA with this man.

(chuckles)
Okay.

All right, I'm gonna
let that slide,

okay, since you're
doing me a favor.

Oh, good, yes, very smart of you
since you're getting a free

birthday gift for
your dad out of this.

Hey, no, it's not entirely free.
I still have to get a frame.

Where'd you find
this photo anyway?

Did you recover it from
the wreckage of the Titanic?

(chuckles)
Very funny.

No, it's from an old album

I found in the back of
my mom's closet.

- Oh.
- All right, well,

I'll just
blow past the lecture

about never going through
a woman's closet but,

for future reference...

- don't do that.
- Copy.

- Okay.
- Okay.

That was their
senior year.

It's hard to believe
my parents were ever

this happy and carefree.
You think can restore it?

Their carefree
happiness? No.

- Oh, the picture.
- Yeah.

- Yeah, I can do the picture.
- (laughs)

So I guess, uh, things are still
okay with you and your dad?

Yeah.

They're better than okay.
You know...

it's like there was
this distance between us

when my sister died, but now
it feels like it's-it's gone.

What changed?

Uh, he finally
let himself grieve.

Turns out you can only bottle
that stuff up for so long.

You are so in touch
with your emotions.

No, I-I'm very tapped
into my emotions. Yeah.

Wow. I mean, it's true,
because I-I saw your Spotify.

Mm-hmm.

Is it legal to have that much
Boyz II Men on a playlist?

I don't...
I think that's illegal.

(both laughing)

(elevator bell dings)

Hey, Adam, I was just
gonna call you.

- You have a visitor.
- Oh, yeah? Who?

Tamiko. She said she's
a friend of yours.

She was pretty upset.

I kind of get
the feeling

she was supposed to be
somewhere else right now.

Anyway,
Detective Williams

is out today,
so I put her in his office.

All right.
Thanks, Jer.

Adam!

I'm so sorry.

I didn't know who else
I could talk to.

Hey, it's okay, it's okay.

I'm glad you found me.

Hey... hey.

Tell me what's going on.

Well, today is my wedding day...

Obviously... only my fiancé
didn't show up to the ceremony.

And now he's missing.

I'm sorry.

- Do you think it's possible that he...
- What, that he got cold feet?

Trust me, at this point...

I'm praying that's the case.

I take it you have reason
to believe otherwise?

I'm so sorry, Noelani.

Dr. Chu. Oh, thank God
you're okay.

I shouldn't have
dragged you into this,

but I had no choice.

They took me from my house,
showed me pictures of my kids.

- They know where they live.
- Okay,

slow down. Just tell me
what's going on.

What do they want from you?

They want me to perform
an operation.

On who?

They wouldn't say.

All I know is...

the patient's aortic valve
is failing

and he needs a new one.

And whoever it is obviously
can't go through legit channels.

Which is where
I come in.

I'm so sorry.

You're the only person
I could think of

who had immediate access
to a valve.

- Why did they choose you?
- Who knows.

Make enough of those
top ten surgeon lists,

people start to know your name.

Noelani, you're not just here
to deliver the valve.

A procedure like this...

I can't do it on my own.

You want me to assist you
in a valve transplant?

You know I only work
on dead people now, right?

You had the best hands
of anyone I ever trained,

which is good,

because there is
no margin for error here.

If this guy dies...

they're not just
going to kill me.

Hey.

Hey, Steve, this is Tamiko.

She and I grew up together.

Our, uh, families
were friends back in Japan.

Tamiko, nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you.

Tamiko, will you tell Steve

what you told me
about your fiancé?

It's okay, you can trust him.

Um... (sniffles)

I met him last year when
he came to work for my family.

Our connection was instant.

With my father's blessing,
we got engaged.

Recently, I could tell
that something was...

bothering him.

And then he told me what.

His real name is Kevin Okada,

and he's an agent with the FBI.

- Okay.
- TAMIKO: He's been working undercover

in my father's organization.

Forgive me, who exactly
is your father?

Hajime Masuda.

Uh, I presume your father

doesn't know this
about your fiancé?

I am the only one who knows.

Well, that's what I thought.

But now that he's missing...

He's missing.

Tamiko...

tell him what happened
last night.

Um...

my father summoned Kevin,
unexpectedly,

to meet, said it was urgent.

I told myself it was just...

a father giving pre-wedding
advice to his son-in-law.

With all due respect, Tamiko,

your father's the head
of the yakuza,

so, I mean, some people
would consider

an unplanned meeting
something to worry about.

- Okay.
- Kevin called me after

and said everything was fine.

Mm-hmm.

And when he didn't show up
for the ceremony this morning,

I went to his hotel room
looking for him.

Um...

(sniffles)
That's when I found this.

What's it say?

"Traitor."

So still no luck tracking down
our missing groom/FBI agent.

I tried to ping his phone
but it's powered down,

so I put out a BOLO on his car.

JUNIOR:
I don't think he got cold feet.

I looked into his financials
and there is no

large withdrawals,
no plane tickets,

or any other purchases
suggesting

- that he was planning to disappear.
- TANI: What about the Feds?

They couldn't have been happy
their undercover was marrying

into the family they were
building a case against.

So, what, you think
they pulled him out?

I mean, that would make sense
if they knew about the wedding,

but I spoke with Okada's
handler and he said

that they were
completely in the dark

about the relationship
between Okada and Tamiko.

Which leads us back
to the most likely scenario.

His cover was blown

- and the yakuza killed him.
- All right, I think

it's time we went and had a chat
with the father of the bride.

Yeah, except Hajime Masuda's

one of the most powerful men
on the Island.

He's basically untouchable.

Jerry's right.

That guy's not gonna talk to us.

ADAM:
No.

But he might talk to me.

MAN: Of course they
send a familiar face.

Imagine I'll be more receptive.

Masuda-san,
I mean no disrespect.

Yet you come to my home and ask
me if I had anything to do

with the disappearance
of my daughter's fiancé.

- Well, did you?
- (scoffs)

That badge has certainly
emboldened you, Mr. Noshimuri.

That wasn't an answer.

My time is valuable, and I have
my daughter to tend to,

so let's stop talking
in circles, shall we?

We both know this man was FBI.

But to answer
your question,

no, I had nothing to do
with his disappearance.

Really?

So you were going to let
your daughter marry a man

whose goal was to take down

your entire organization?

You don't have children, do you?

No, I don't.

Well, when you do,
you will understand

the lengths a father will go to

to protect their happiness.

Even if it costs you

everything.

As I'm sure you heard,

Tamiko was married once before,

to someone of my choosing.

It didn't end well.

But this time...

I saw how happy she was.

So what was the meeting about?

Tamiko told me you summoned
Kevin here last night.

I informed Mr. Okada that I knew
who he was working for.

I also told him that I was...

arranging an off-shore
account for him and Tamiko...

with five million dollars in it.

He was to marry
my daughter and...

...take her on their honeymoon.

Then they were to disappear.

Forever.

And Tamiko knew nothing
of this plan?

A father's sacrifice then, huh?

I understand it's
hard to believe

that I was willing to
send her away and...

never see her again, but...

it was the only way
I could protect her future.

ADAM:
I know he had

all the motive
in the world, Steve,

but, my gut tells me Masuda
had nothing to do

with Okada's disappearance.

Well, I mean,
his story checks out,

at least about
the five million dollars.

Jerry looked into
the offshore account.

Masuda set it up in both
Okada and Tamiko's names.

And it's all still there.

At least we know Okada
didn't run off with the money.

Right. We got any indication

how Masuda made
Okada as FBI?

No, a-and I didn't ask.

Mainly because it-it's a question
he would never answer.

There's another possibility
here, you know.

Masuda wasn't the only person
who had a lot to lose

if the FBI
made this case, right?

What if somebody inside
Masuda's organization

realized it was a problem
and decided to take care of it?

I don't know, Steve.
Killing Masuda's

future son-in-law
without his permission?

That's basically signing your
own death warrant. (knocking)

(door opens)
GROVER: Hey.

I just heard from Duke.

Our missing groom's
body's been found.

Adam, you get that?

(car doors closing) ADAM: Hey, Duke.
What do we got?

Call came in
an hour ago.

But it looks like the car's
been here for some time.

According to the M.E., he's been
dead for at least six hours.

All right.
Guy is garroted

in his own car.
Left in plain sight.

Well, whoever did this obviously
wanted us to find him.

Yeah, they're sending a message.

I think you're
right about that.

M.E. found this in his mouth.

GROVER:
Oh, yeah, rat in the mouth.

So either Masuda's lying to us

and the yakuza actually did kill him...
Or someone's trying

very hard
to make it look that way.

(engine stops)

(knocking)

I need to speak
to your daughter.

[♪ ♪]

After my first marriage ended...

...I told myself
I would never get involved

with someone
with yakuza ties again.

Then I met Kevin.

And he was kind and caring
and completely different

from anyone
my father did business with.

Turned out there was
a reason for that.

I'm a fool for thinking
it would work.

No.

That this would end
any other way?

No. No, you're not.

And this isn't your fault.

You know...
(sniffles)

...if our families had
had their way,

you and I would be
married right now.

(both chuckle)

Probably with kids
running around by this point.

Yeah, they never held
back when it came to

- voicing that opinion, did they?
- (laughs)

My mother...

...always made a point
of telling me

how handsome
she thought you were.

Oh.

Why, thank you, Mom.

(chuckles)

My father... he was
less subtle.

He just told me our marriage

would be great for business.

- Oh, no, I got that speech, too.
- Good.

Listen.

The truth is I've always
thought highly of you.

I just didn't want other people
planning my life for me.

So I followed my heart instead.

And ended up...

falling in love with
just about the last person

my father would have
approved of.

I was sorry to hear it didn't
work out with you and Kono.

Yeah.

Hey, listen.

You should know...

...right now, we don't
think your father

had anything to do
with Kevin's death.

Does it matter
who gave the order?

I've spent my whole life
with this sh-shadow...

looming over me.

No matter how far I run,
it just follows me.

I'll never get free of it.

Hey.

Listen to me.

I know it feels that way.

The expectations of your family,

the assumptions of others.

But you can get free of it.

Look at me.

I did.

(sighs)

We've got a problem here.

What's wrong?

(sighs)
It's the valve.

There's significant
calcification on it.

It's not something you
could've determined.

- Not under the circumstances.
- ALEKI: Hey.

What's going on?

The valve isn't viable
for transplant.

What?

It's not her fault.

I don't care who's fault it is.

How are you gonna fix this?

We'll just...
get another valve.

That's not gonna happen.

It is if you want him to live.

She got us a bad valve.

Look, I can go back tonight.
Get another one from the morgue.

Like I said,
that's not gonna happen.

CUNHA:
Oh, my God!

There's your fresh valve.

Get to work.

JERRY:
So, now that we've moved off

of Masuda as a suspect,
I started looking into

who else might've wanted
Agent Okada dead.

I figured a good place to start
would be his previous cases.

That would make sense.
Anybody he put away

- would certainly have motive.
- JERRY: Precisely.

So, during his time at
the Bureau, Okada had

eight UC assignments.

All of which were on the
mainland, except one.

Six years ago, he was embedded
on Maui, gathering intel

on this guy:

Ron Craft. Okada
worked undercover

at Craft's chemical
supply business.

And, lo and behold,
it turned out to be a front

for a massive
methamphetamine operation.

Craft was convicted
for trafficking,

did four years
of a 15-year sentence,

and was released
a few months ago.

Why'd he get out so early?

Uh, the conviction
was vacated on appeal.

Chain of evidence
improprieties.

Sounds like the guy had motive
and opportunity to me.

And the last couple months
to track down Okada

and plot his revenge.

So we start with Craft.
Jerry,

we got a current address
on this guy?

(banging on door)

Can I help you?

Five-O. We're looking

for Ron Craft.

What's this about?

Ma'am, you need to step aside.

He's gone. He's been
gone a few days now.

Okay, well, do you know
where he is?

On a fishing trip.
He borrowed my brother's boat.

We're gonna need a description
of that vessel.

Clear.
Clear?

White sport
fishing boat.

About 25 feet long.
The SS Moray.

Okay, I'm gonna call
this boat in and see

if Coast Guard
can track it down.

- Okay.
- All right.

I don't know what you think
Ron has done,

but this is harassment.

He's already served his time.

Four years, for something
he didn't even do.

You all need to leave us alone.

Ms. Craft,
do you recognize this man?

Um, yeah, that's...
that's Aaron Shibita.

He used to work with Ron.

What does he have to do
with any of this?

Well, I'm sorry to tell you,
but he's dead.

And your husband's
a suspect in his murder.

Aaron wasn't just an employee
of Ron's, he became

part of this family.

Coming over for dinner,

going with us to church,
camping.

Then when Ron went to prison,

his business shut down
and Aaron took a job

in another city.

And you haven't seen
or heard from him since?

Well, not directly.

What do you mean by that?

Before he moved away,
Aaron said he wanted to help.

I was pregnant at the time.

And pretty scared
about getting by

with Ron gone for so many years.

So Aaron gave me some money.

And ever since,
he has sent me $200

every month.

It may not seem like a lot, but
it has made a huge difference.

Did your husband know that Aaron
was sending you money?

Not while he was in prison.
Aaron told me not to tell him.

He was worried
that Ron would be upset.

You know, because of his pride.

And so, when Ron
got out last month?

He asked a lot of questions
about how I made ends meet

all these years.

So I told him
about Aaron helping out.

But the thing is,
he wasn't mad at all.

He actually seemed
pleased about it.

JUNIOR:
So, Mrs. Craft,

can you tell us
exactly how Aaron

was sending you all this money?

He'd wire a money order
to the post office.

Why?

(door closes)

So it looks like our vic Okada

was the FBI agent
with a heart of gold.

Yeah, well, he sure made a habit
of getting involved

with the subjects
of his investigations.

Craft gets out of jail, he
hears that his old buddy Aaron

skipped town around the
time of his arrest. Mm-hmm.

He puts together that
Aaron was the undercover

that built the case against him

and normally, he wouldn't have
a way of tracking him down...

But thanks to Aaron's
generosity, you know,

he gets this massive lead:
all the payments

he was making to Craft's wife.
Right.

And then, so he traces
the money orders back to Oahu,

he finds out that Aaron
is undercover,

building a case
against the yakuza.

And then Craft kills him and
makes it look like a yakuza hit.

CHU:
Patient fully induced.

EKG looks normal.

CBM prepped and clear.

Keep an eye on the MAP
as we work.

Copy. Nothing above 70.

We ready to do this?

Actually, one small problem.

What is it?

She needs to use the restroom.

Not happening.

We're about to start a very long

and complicated procedure.

I need her focused
and distraction-free.

Trust me,

you'd rather she go now
than once we've started

and the patient's chest
is split wide open.

Go with her.

(door closes)

You're really gonna
follow me in there?

Just make it quick.

(both grunting)

Hey, where is she?

(gun cocks)

Do exactly what I say and
don't move, or I'll shoot you.

Now hand your gun
to Dr. Chu, slowly.

Do it, now.

Now get on the ground,
face down.

And don't move.

Let's go.

Go, go, go!

Come on.

We got to get out of here.

There.

(Aleki grunting)

(gun cocks)

What are you doing?

I can't let you leave.

Tara, are you working for them?

I'm sorry.

Forceps.

Suture.

Suture.

I worshiped you.

Noelani, please...

You knew that.

That's how you knew
you could lure me here.

You knew I'd do anything
to help you.

Because at the lowest time
in my life,

when even my own mother
wouldn't believe in me, you did.

A lot's happened since then.

- I don't expect you to understand.
- Try me.

There was a malpractice claim
against me.

I did everything by the book,

but the hospital
needed a scapegoat.

I gave my life to that place,
and they hung me out to dry.

The legal fees bankrupted me.

I was the same surgeon
with the same skills

with nowhere to use them.

So now I use them like this.

I am still saving lives.

Yeah, of criminals.

They're going to kill me.

- You know that, right?
- No, you're safe.

I made a deal with them.

Yeah? What about the guy
whose valve we're using?

You think he had a deal, too?

I'm too valuable to them.
They need me.

You know, you can lie to me,
but don't lie to yourself.

There's only one way
this ends for me.

Here's what I know for sure:

you know the guy
who's calls the shots,

the one who brought you here?

This is his father
we're operating on.

So if we screw up...

You saw what he did
to his own man.

What do you think
he'll do to us?

Now, please,

hand me the damn suture.

(phone ringing)

Hey, Jer, what's up?

Good news. Coast Guard

tracked down Ron Craft's boat.

That was fast.
Where is it?

Sand Island Pier.
McGarrett and Adam

are on their way now.

Wait, Craft is still on Oahu?

- How does that make sense?
- It doesn't.

He just killed a federal agent.

He should be trying to get off
the island, and fast.

Exactly.
So why stick around?

Clear.

Single tap to the back of
the head. Looks professional.

Well, I can think of one person
who'd want Ron Craft dead.

Yeah, Masuda.

ADAM:
Right.

But how the hell did Masuda
track him down before we did?

The same way he found out
Okada was FBI.

He's got to have somebody inside
the Bureau on his payroll.

All right,
let's get CSU down here

and sweep this vessel for prints
and shell casings.

Hopefully, we'll get lucky,
find something

that actually ties us

to Masuda's organization.
(phone ringing)

Hey, Lou, what's going on?

It's Noelani. Duke reached out
to her several times today

because she never
showed up for work.

But she didn't respond
to any of his calls or texts,

so we sent an officer
by her place.

- Okay, w-what, she wasn't there?
- No.

So he checked
the morgue as well.

A security guard said

that she showed up there early,
like, 4:00 a.m. this morning.

She told him that she was just
picking up some paperwork

for a trial today.

She make it to court?

I checked every trial

on the docket,
and Noelani wasn't scheduled

to be at any one of them.

Why would she lie to the guard?

Blood pressure's 110/80.

I know this
won't mean much

coming from me
right now, but...

Is this the part where you tell
me what a good job I did?

Noelani, If there was any other
way I could've done this,

I would have.

He's all closed up and stable.

- So far so good.
- Okay, good.

You, come with me.

Wait. We had a deal.

Relax.
I'm taking her home.

Then we'll all go together.

Yeah, it's not gonna
work out that way.

Come on, let's go.

Let's go.

- You want your father to live?
- Whoa...

Then that's exactly
how it's gonna go.

- Now put it down.
- ALEKI: Okay, you win.

You win, okay? Just don't
hurt him. Okay? You...

(screams)
Oh, my God!

Oh...

I'm so sorry...
It's okay. Just hold on.

Let's go. Let's go.
I'm not gonna ask you again.

(monitor beeping rapidly)
What's happening?

CUNHA: I don't know. It looks like
blood pressure is dropping fast.

You said he was okay.
What do you mean?

CHU: Cardiac...

tamponade.

What does that mean?
It happens sometimes

after a surgery like this.
It means that

the heart is bleeding
into the sac surrounding it.

- Fix it. Now.
- Go.

- I'll talk you through it.
- CUNHA: No!

- I'm not leaving you.
- You have to.

CHU:
If he dies,

you die, too.

She's right,
so get up now.

Get up.

JERRY: I'm no expert, but this doesn't
look like your standard autopsy.

No. It looks like she's pulling
something out of his chest.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa...
See that? Stop.

Stop-stop, and go back.

Right there.

GROVER: She's looking
right into the camera.

Like she thinks
somebody's watching her.

Somebody probably is.

I mean, she had to have been
coerced into doing this.

GROVER:
Yeah.

Oh, here we go.

Looks like there was an
external breach of the system

at 3:41 a.m.

So somebody sends Noelani
in here fishing

around for body parts,

making sure that she knows that
they're keeping an eye on her.

Well, it explains
why she couldn't reach out

- to anyone for help.
- STEVE: But the only reason.

Noelani would go through
with something like this

is if somebody had
some leverage on her.

TANI:
Hey, I just spoke to security

at the county morgue.
They sent over

the sign-in logs
from this morning.

The on-duty guard remembers.

Noelani signing in,
which struck him as odd

because she usually
swipes a badge.

And it makes sense when you
see what what she wrote.

STEVE:
Dr. Tara Chu?

JERRY:
She left us a clue.

Whatever Noelani
is wrapped up in,

this Dr. Chu must be
involved somehow.

Yeah, well, I looked into her.
She's an accomplished

cardiothoracic surgeon.

Well, that lines
right up with Noelani

digging around
in this guy's chest.

She also taught at
Oahu State's med school.

That's where Noelani did
her training, right?

Mm-hmm.

We got to track down
this Dr. Chu.

Yeah, I tried to
call her, no answer.

All right, Jerry, let's see
if we can trace her phone.

All right, I've finished
the subxiphoid incision.

Good.

Now use the Allis clamp...

to grasp the pericardium.

The pericardium window
should be clear.

Do you see the excess buildup?

Yeah, you were right.
It's cardiac tamponade.

- If my father dies...
- Yeah, yeah.

I heard you the first
dozen times.

But you should have
thought of that

before you shot the one person

that knows how
to do this surgery.

I'm just following
her instructions.

Now, put pressure on her wound,
'cause if she bleeds out,

she's not the only one
that dies here.

CHU:
Time to puncture

the pericardium.

Firmly grasp
the aspirating needle.

Noelani...

...you've got this.

Five-O.
Show me your hands.

(grunts)

(grunts)

Noelani, you okay?

Yeah. But she's gonna need help.

STEVE:
We got a medic outside.

How about him?

It's okay.
I got this.

Yo, I'm out.

Wait, wait, not so fast.

What do you got?

Here you go.

Wow.

Um, it's amazing.

Thank you.
You even framed it for me.

What's wrong?

Hmm?

That reaction was, like,
a six out of ten at best.

What's going on?

Um... it's nothing.

James, are we really
gonna do this?

You're gonna tell me five times
that everything's fine,

and then finally
come out with it?

(clears throat)

Okay.

I just got a call.

The drunk driver
who killed my sister...

Um, turns out he's up
for early parole.

Hearing's in a few weeks.

Are you okay?

Yeah, yeah, I'm fine.

Yeah, but it's...

it's not me I'm worried about.

He's been doing so well.
You know, it's taken him years

to get to this point where
we can even mention Maya's name.

And I'm just afraid
this might set him back.

I believe you were there
the day that was taken.

I believe you're right.

I understand
you have news for me.

I do.

We found the man who murdered
your daughter's fiancé.

And? Someone else
got to him first.

He'd been executed.

We managed to
retrieve the casing,

but it traced back
to an unlicensed weapon.

You know, you don't seem very
surprised by any of this.

It's hardly surprising when
a man's deeds catch up to him.

Do you really think he
deserved something different?

No, he deserved to be
held accountable.

I just think you and I
have a very different idea

of what that means.

Perhaps.

(scoffs)

It's been a long day,
Mr. Noshimuri.

Is there anything else?

Oh, yeah.

Just this.

We will track down your
source inside the FBI.

And when they start naming names
in an effort to save themselves,

we'll be back here
to arrest you.

I have no doubt you'll be back.

But not to arrest me.

You see...

I know you, Mr. Noshimuri.

Where you come from.

What you've done.

You can fool others
by carrying that badge, but...

...you can only fool yourself
for so long.

One day...

you will accept who you are,

and who you'll always be.

And on that day...

...this drink will be
waiting for you.

I'm, uh, really sorry
she didn't make it.

I know it's a small
comfort, Noelani,

but the guy that you saved
was a big-time arms smuggler.

And now, thanks to you,
he's gonna be around

to serve a nice, long sentence.

And, with any luck,
he's gonna help us

take down a bunch of people
just like him.

(sniffles)

You think
you know someone, and...

Sorry, I-I shouldn't be here.

(door opens, shuts)

(door opens)

Noelani, I can, uh,
I can-I can come back later.

You know, for
the longest time,

all I wanted to be
was a surgeon.

I just didn't
know what kind.

Then I met Dr. Chu
and it all became clear.

She was everything
I ever wanted to be.

Until she wasn't.

Well, what changed?

Dr. Chu was an
incredible surgeon.

But she wasn't God.

You know, people put
their lives in her hands,

and sometimes she had to
watch them die on the table.

You have to wall off
a certain part of yourself

to be able to survive
something like that.

Stop feeling the feelings that
people are supposed to feel.

It was a sacrifice
I wasn't prepared to make.

Well, I can certainly
understand that.

Yeah, well, my
parents couldn't.

(scoffs)

(sighs)

They thought
I was crazy to get

so close to surgical residency,
only to walk away

and start all over again.

But it wasn't them that I was
worried about disappointing.

It was Dr. Chu.

She was so understanding.

Told me to trust my instincts.

She even wrote the letter
of recommendation

that got me into the forensic
pathology fellowship.

Regardless of whatever
mistakes she made...

...she was the one person
that supported me

when I needed it the most.

But when she needed me...

...I couldn't save her.

You know something,
I was, uh...

I was in exactly
the same place you are

not so long ago.

Trying...
to figure out

how to handle losing

somebody incredibly
important to me.

And, Noelani,
there is a lot of questions

we will never get answers to.

That's just how it is, but...

...I made peace with something.

I could never have saved Joe.

Just like you could
never have saved her.

You know that, right?

Yeah.

Okay.

But it doesn't
make it hurt any less.

No, it doesn't.

No, it doesn't.

Captioned by Media Access
Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org

Sync corrections by srjanapala