Original subtitles

Hippocampus: So, as you can see, this pointer,

or "hand" as I call it,

travels around the circle once per hour.

Now, what do I mean when I say "hour"?

Joshua: I have a question. What's with that zit?

Hippocampus: It's nothing. It's a zit. Whatever.

So, the beauty of this "clock" is that--

Miriam: Are you gonna pop that thing? Or can I?

Hippocampus: You guys, what I'm showing you here

is probably the most useful thing that I've ever invented.

Shelly: Is it hot to the touch? Hippocampus: The clock?

Shelly: No, the thing on your face.

Joshua: What's a clock?

Hippocampus: It's what I'm showing you!

It's the thing behind me.

Miriam: How can anyone focus on that when

you've got this massive weeping zit

staring at us?

Hippocampus: It's just dead skin and excess oil.

Joshua: Are you trying to make us sick?

Hippocampus: I'm trying to show you

a life-changing invention.

Miriam: Look how it moves when he talks.

Hippocampus: All right, you know what?

This thing is too good for you people.

I'm showing you the future of civilization

and all you care about is my face?

I'll tell you what time it is: it's time for you

to grow up! Grow up!

Joshua: Look out, it's gonna blow!

Citizens: Aah! Oh!

Singers: ♪ Huh ♪

♪ Huh huh huh huh ♪

♪ Whoo ♪

Tyrannis: Great news, everyone. Our pile of dead horses

has finally been cleared by wolves.

So, now we've got a small wolf problem,

but a nice patch of land

in the town square for public use.

Shlub: I thought the pile of dead horses

was for public use.

Stupendous: So, what are you gonna put there?

Tyrannis: I was thinking we plant a tree.

One of those super old trees that everyone loves.

It won't be old when we plant it, but in 100 years--

Stupendous: Boring! You wanna know what we need? A statue.

Tyrannis: A statue? Of whom?

Stupendous: Of youm, ya nimrod!

I was just in Argos and they have this

huge statue of their king on a horse.

Gave the whole town a thing to rally behind.

And it was a blast to tear down.

So, I was thinking, you're always complaining

people don't show you enough respect

and blah blah blah. But maybe

it's just cuz they forget you're their leader.

Deliria: Leader of what? Tyrannis: Are you really asking that

or are you just trying to make me feel bad?

Deliria: Mmm...give me a clue.

Tyrannis: Krapopolis, this city! Deliria: Krapopolis, of course.

Shlub: I think a statue is a great idea.

A heroic pose, you leading the charge,

toga blowing in the breeze, maybe show a little skin.

Tyrannis: I'm not doing that. Deliria: Oh, I know what's happening.

He's insecure about his body.

Stupendous: Great call. Tyrannis: Nope, nothing could be

further from the truth. I simply don't want to

shove my face in everyone's face.

I love this city too much to do that.

Hippocampus: It's official. I hate this city.

I just showed them the most important invention since forks

and all they can focus on is my appearance.

Deliria: Yes, what is going on with your appearance?

Hippocampus: Well, like most living creatures,

I sometimes get pimples, and apparently,

that's all that anyone can focus on.

Tyrannis: It's all I'm focusing on.

Stupendous: There's almost nothing else visible in there.

Shlub: Whoever cursed you, she did a great job.

Hippocampus: It's not a curse. This pimple

is naturally occurring. Shlub: No such thing.

Hippocampus: Mom, can you just get rid of this?

It doesn't bother me but it's

interfering with the part of my job

where I unveil something brilliant

and everyone knows I'm brilliant.

Deliria: Oh, I wouldn't trust myself to

take on a pimple like that.

But I have a fantastic skin guy.

Dr. Paulakis. He's a genius.

Hippocampus: Let's not throw that word around.

He's a skin guy. Deliria: He happens

to be a demigod, but he has

the pore-clearing powers of a full one.

Hippocampus: Fine. Let's just get this thing off my face

so I can get back to everyone knowing how smart I am.

Deliria: Oh, I love it! A spa weekend!

Hippocampus: Not a spa weekend, a spa hour

at most, and you'd know what an hour was

if I didn't have this zit!

Shlub: Look at this statue here.

It's absolutely gorgeous, correct?

Six-pack abs, every muscle perfectly sculpted.

The butt, muscular yet inviting.

Stupendous: I'd lick that statue from top to bottom.

Shlub: I'd meet you in the middle.

Tyrannis: Yes, it's a beautiful statue.

Why do I care? Shlub: Because, my dear boy,

this is a statue of King Jorbus.

Tyrannis: Who's King Jorbus? Stupendous: He's that dog-faced

king from downriver.

Tyrannis: Oh, that guy? He's a dog!

Stupendous: Yeah, a big, lumpy,

hairy, ugly dog.

Tyrannis: Mangy, jowly, drooling...

Shlub: I picture King Jorbus whenever

I need to slow things down with your mother,

if you know what I mean!

Stupendous: Dad, we were having fun.

Shlub: And so were your mother and I--

too much!--until I thought of King Jorbus.

Stupendous: The point is, we found the sculptor

who did this, and he says he can

do the same for you.

Tyrannis: Wow. A statue like this of me?

OK, I'm going to make a small confession here.

Stupendous: You're ashamed of your body. Tyrannis: I'm ashamed of--no.

Stupendous: We said it earlier.

Tyrannis: But you were wrong then because

you didn't know, whereas now you

do know because I'm telling you.

Shlub: Well, I'd say it was pretty clear.

Tyrannis: No, it wasn't. You were speculating.

Stupendous: Correctly. Tyrannis: Incorrectly.

But in a way that coincidentally

echoed a hidden truth:

I am ashamed of my body. Stupendous: OK.

Tyrannis: But if this guy can make Jorbus look this good,

he could certainly touch up my few minor flaws!

You know, the handful of things that no one else notices

but that I focus on.

Stupendous: Like super-skinny arms.

Shlub: Or your completely outsized head.

Tyrannis: We don't need to list them.

Stupendous: Oooh! That patch of eczema that led

Hippo to discover eczema.

Shlub: The knees. Stupendous: Oh, yeah!

Shlub: Those baggy nipples.

Tyrannis: They're only baggy because

Stupe keeps twisting them!

Stupendous: Or do I twist 'em

because they're baggy?

It's a chicken and the egg situation.

But with nipples.

Shlub: Baggy nipples!

[Stupendous and Shlub laugh]

Stupendous: But, yeah, I think this guy could

touch all that up.

Hippocampus: I don't get it. I thought one of

the perks of being an immortal

is that you have no flaws.

Deliria: Please. Beauty amongst gods

is a competitive business.

Last year, I was in the sauna here with Demeter!

"Goddess of Grain" is right!

She should try being the "Goddess of

Lean Protein" for a bit.

Sherry: Welcome to Dermiapolis Aesthetic Lab.

Hippocampus: "Lab"? Pfft. We're barely inside

and already swimming in pseudoscience.

Deliria: Oh, stop. Cosmetologists are just

chemists who have sex.

Uh, Deliria, Goddess, the.

We're here to see Dr. Paulakis.

Dr. Paulakis: Deliria! Deliria: Dr. Paulakis!

Dr. Paulakis: Ahh! You don't look a day over

7 million billion.

Deliria: Mwah! Mwah!

Dr. Paulakis: I've got some cream for that.

Deliria: For what?

Dr. Paulakis: Don't worry about it.

And this must be your--

absolutely gigantic nodular papule.

Hippocampus: I'm Hippocampus. Her son.

Deliria: Yes, can you do anything for him?

Dr. Paulakis: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm mm-hmm mm-hmm,

uh-huh, uh-uh, ahhh...

and the pimple is the only thing we're doing today?

Hippocampus: Yes. Dr. Paulakis: That's a damn shame.

Tell me, Hippo, how do you wash your face?

Hippocampus: Um, with water?

Dr. Paulakis: Water?! Nooooo!

I'm not hearing this, Deliria. Zap my ears off!

No, seriously, do it. They grow back

so smooth, like a baby's.

Deliria: Dr. Paulakis says that water

loads your face with toxins.

Hippocampus: Can we stop pretending this is a medical thing

and just pop the zit? Please?

Deliria: Right. You'll have to forgive Hippocampus.

He's a bit of a self-care skeptic.

Dr. Paulakis: Well, let's change that right now.

Let me show you what we do here.

This is our Dermatorium.

Deliria: Everyone here is glowing!

Do you milk your own fairies?

Dr. Paulakis: On site! This is our

physical therapy center.

Hippocampus: Wow. Is that Achilles?

Dr. Paulakis: Sure is. Achilles: Ahhhhh!

How do I always forget about those heels!

It's almost like forgetfulness is my central flaw. [Laughs]

Dr. Paulakis: In this room, we're using

a simple prosthetic to turn

a cyclops into a regularclops.

Let's watch. Cyclops: [Gasp] I'm pretty!

Hippocampus: What's going on in there?

Dr. Paulakis: We're giving a Kraken huge boobs.

And the self-confidence to ask for a promotion.

Hippocampus: How do you do that? Dr. Paulakis: The boobs.

Hippocampus: OK, that Kraken did look

pretty thrilled with his new jugs, but

I'm skeptical of any medical facility

that serves mimosas.

Dr. Paulakis: Let's get that thing off your face

before it orders lunch!

This might pinch a bit.

Hippocampus: Aah!

Dr. Paulakis: See for yourself.

Hippocampus: I...I don't know what to say!

What was in that syringe?!

Dr. Paulakis: Mermaid pee-pee.

It's the most astringent

substance on Earth.

Trust me, I've tasted them all.

Merman: Hey, cutie. If you want to take care

of that bacne, I've got a full tank.

Just say the word. Hippocampus: I'm good.

Dr. Paulakis: You are good. And don't you feel good?

Hippocampus: Well, whatever emotional thing

I'm feeling, it doesn't matter.

All that matters is people will listen to me again.

Dr. Paulakis: It's true. Medically speaking,

people respect you more when you're

easy to look at.

Not to be indelicate, Hippo,

but, uh...may I?

Hippocampus: Oh, um... Oh, I don't, I don't--

My cheekbones have cheekbones.

You're telling me I could have bone structure?

Dr. Paulakis: Any structure can have bones

if you stick bones in it. And Hippo?

We have so many bones.

Hippocampus: Remind me what that

scary-looking machine does?

Dr. Paulakis: You're a man of science, so,

I won't mince words.

These tube-y things suck some goop out of you,

which makes you look hot.

Hippocampus: What? What kind of "goop"?

Dr. Paulakis: I don't know how much more

detail you want than that, Mr. Hippo.

Sherry: Mimosa? You're gonna look

sooo bony.

Hippocampus: Could someone just say

there's a medical reason why

the mimosa is necessary?

Deliria: Just drink the damn mimosa.

It's a spa weekend.

Hippocampus: I guess it is.

Um, should you be drinking

right now--aghh-GGGaaah!

Tyrannis: I love the way you did the muscles.

Entochus: Yes, clients have been asking for

more and more skin. Shlub: Love that stuff!

Entochus: It just projects confidence, doesn't it?

Honestly, the more they show, the cooler they seem.

Tyrannis: You know what? What if we took

my statue further?

What if we went fully nude?

How bold would that be?

The king with nothing to hide!

Shlub: It's like they say:

"You haven't had fun till /

You've gone full frontal!"

Do they say that? Or did I just make that up?

I can't tell these days.

Tyrannis: Let's do it! A nude statue!

Stupendous: Who's this guy? He sounds like my brother

but he's got the body confidence of a normal person.

Tyrannis: Well, it's not that much of a risk.

We all saw what this gifted sculptor did with Jorbus.

I think I'm in pretty good hands.

Entochus: I love it. So, just stand here and strip down.

Tyrannis: Me strip? I assumed you could

do the naked bits without actually seeing them.

You can't just fill in the blanks?

Stupendous: There's my brother back.

Entochus: Do you want me to strip down

to put you at ease?

Shlub: I'm already naked.

Stupendous: You want me to drop trou? I'll drop trou.

Tyrannis: No one needs to drop trou.

I've got this.

The uh, the shirt as well?

Entochus: Obviously.

Stupendous: What the hell is that other thing you're wearing?

Tyrannis: It's a new kind of garment.

I call it "under-wear."

Stupendous: "Under-wear"? Because you wear it

under your clothes?

That's the stupidest thing I ever heard of in my life.

We don't have to stay for this, right?

Shlub: Not if there's wine anywhere in the world.

Tyrannis: OK, I'll just...

Entochus: Oof. Students? You can come in now.

Tyrannis: You have students?! Entochus: Of course.

I'm an artist. I have a huge ego. Ladies?

Tyrannis: Your students are women?

Entochus: I have a god complex combined with

psycho-sexual control issues.

Why are we even having this conversation?

Hippocampus: So, the hand travels around the circle,

indicating the movement of time.

Woman #1: That is so smart. Woman #2: Absolute genius.

Hippocampus: Thank you! This fish-man

could get fish-used to this.

Deliria: Aha. Can we skip the part

where I say, "I don't want to say I told you so,"

and get right to the "I told you so"?

Because: I told you so.

Hippocampus: Go ahead and tell me so.

All I know is it was a hell of a lot easier

holding their attention looking like this.

Deliria: Oh, my boy, all of life is

easier when you're hot.

And what makes it even easier than that

is when people you're with are hot

or at least not not hot,

so you don't have to deal with their insecurities.

Such a drag. Did you want a refill on that mimosa?

Hippocampus: Yeah, I just need to get the server's attention.

Deliria: No, you don't. Just stare at your

empty glass and make the slightest frown.

Sherry: Let me get that for you. Hippocampus: Unbelievable.

It's like a superpower.

Deliria: Welcome to hotness,

where everyone works for you

and everything is free. [Glasses clink]

Entochus: Wow, there's a lot of detail

on this guy, huh, ladies?

Student: Yeah, are you guys seeing this fold

on top of this other fold?

Tyrannis: That's a very common fold.

Student: I don't even know what I'm looking at.

Tyrannis: Thankfully, none of this is getting

into the actual sculpture, right?

Entochus: What? King Jorbus: Knock knock!

Entochus: Jorbus! How are you doing, old friend?

Tyrannis: Jorbus? King Jorbus: I just wanted to

stop by and take a look at my statue.

Tyrannis: You're King Jorbus? No, no, no, no.

King Jorbus is ugly.

King Jorbus: Oh, you're thinking of my brother

King Glorbus.

I got the looks in the family.

But you should hear him sing.

Voice of an angel.

Tyrannis: So, then, that statue

is not...exaggerated?

Entochus: Exaggerated? Oh, I would never.

That would defeat the purpose of my art.

My whole thing is absolute realism.

Tyrannis: OK, but don't you achieve that by

pursuing, um, a-a kind of creative

flight of fancy? Entochus: Nope.

Tyrannis: Capture the truth of how it looks

by making it look a little

different from the way it looks?

Entochus: No. Realism.

Tyrannis: Oh, God. You put it all in there?

Even the random patch of hair on my left buttock?

Student: It makes me sad...and angry...

and nauseated all at once.

It's genius. You're a genius.

Entochus: Date me. Student: That's the only reason

I took the class. Entochus: Christie, I have

a new girlfriend now. You're number two.

Christie: Love you and hate you.

Deliria: All right. I've officially had

every treatment this place offers.

I've had wax applied where nothing

waxable grows. Time to go.

Centaur Therapist: [Brays] Don't forget to drink waterrrrr!

Hippocampus: Pfft. I am water.

Sure you don't wanna stay a couple days?

I got nothing going on at home.

Deliria: You don't want to get back to your lab?

That's not the Hippocampus I know.

Hippocampus: I'm not that Hippo anymore.

I'm this now. You welcomed me to hotness

and I'm not going back.

Woman #1: Hey, Hippo, you wanna tell us

more about your clock? Woman #2: Or anything?

Hippocampus: Love to. So, how the clock works is

I put these wheels in it. They have jaggy edges.

I know what they're called. They're, um,

they're those wheels, those wheels with jaggy edges.

They're, like, round? You know--you know,

I don't think there's a word for 'em.

I'll make one up. Spiky Rounds.

And the reason for them is...

something about the clock.

So, then, it kinda goes around and you can be like,

"OK, there you go! See, it's...a clock."

Deliria: OK, well, now this is embarrassing.

Hippocampus: Hey, should I get my quads done?

Dr. Paulakis says it would

balance out my whole profile.

Deliria: Something's wrong with you.

Hippocampus: So, you agree, my profile's a little off.

Deliria: Not your profile. You're stupid.

Hippocampus: Huh? Deliria: The machine.

It gave you looks but stole your intelligence!

Hippocampus: Oh, my God...I'm dumb!

Deliria: And I'm surprised to find I care.

I suppose I take a certain pride in your intelligence.

As should you, Hippocampus! He's made you stupid!

Hippocampus: Right! OK, think. Oh!

I had a contingency plan in case I ever got dumb!

This is exactly why I came up with it,

this specific situation. I thought,

what if I got dumb and I wasn't smart anymore?

I could still have a smart plan as long as

I didn't have to come up with it with my dumb brain!

So, I came up with a plan for how to get smart again

if I ever was dumb. Deliria: Yes?

Hippocampus: I can't remember. I can't remember! Gah!

Deliria: All right, all right, let's not panic.

We'll figure something out before your intelligence

slips away altogether.

Hippocampus: Stupid Smart Hippo!

Should've made the plan dumber

so a dumb person could understand it!

But I think basically good things

happen to good people. So, we're gonna be fine.

Deliria: Oh, my God, we're too late. Help!

Help! Someone help my gorgeous idiot son!

Dr. Paulakis: OK, so, that butt-lift

is going to settle in a bit,

but if it slides down your thighs,

and especially to your ankles,

come back in for a touch-up.

Satyr: Got it. Oh, I forgot

to ask about pooing.

Dr. Paulakis: Don't! Satyr: Don't ask? Or...?

Dr. Paulakis: You'd really better not.

Deliria: Hello there. Sorry to bother you.

Something's wrong with Hippocampus.

You seem to have removed his intelligence.

Dr. Paulakis: Did I not do what I said I would?

Deliria: Yes, you made him hot, but you also

made him into a vapid, brainless idiot,

which is not what we wanted and also

a really harmful stereotype.

Dr. Paulakis: Well, I'm sorry, but the goo that

contains a mortal's "ugly"

also unfortunately contains their "smarts."

Suck out some ugly, you suck out some smarts. It's just science.

Hippocampus: That makes total sense to me.

I don't even need any further explanation.

I'm just buying it and moving on.

Deliria: Just change him back.

He's like a whole new Hippocampus now

and I really don't have the energy

to get to know him again.

Dr. Paulakis: Oh, I'm afraid

I can't do that.

Hippo's smart goo is

incredibly valuable stuff.

If you apply it topically, it plumps your lips

like nothing else I've tried.

Hippocampus: Ooh, really?

Dr. Paulakis: Yes, I'm calling it

Dr. Paulakis' Lip Food.

Deliria: Oh, the packaging is superb,

but that doesn't change the fact that

he needs it all back!

Dr. Paulakis: What did I tell you?

It's mine now!

Deliria: You have chosen the wrong battle!

Oh, my God. I hate how much

I want one of those!

Tyrannis: Dad, why did you think

Jorbus was the ugly one?

Shlub: It was an honest mistake.

Their names are silly and they rhyme.

Stupendous: You want me to just break it?

Just give me the order.

Tyrannis: Is there a way you could make it

look like an accident? I would hate

for people to think I ordered you

to break my own statue

because it looked like me.

Shlub: Son, I owe you an apology.

But not the one you think.

I'm sorry that I didn't tell you

from the very start that you're beautiful.

I love what your soft jawline says

about your babylike innocence.

Tyrannis: OK, we don't need to get into details.

Shlub: I love how the sun peeks through your sinewy legs.

Tyrannis: The point is made. Stupendous: Stop there.

Shlub: I think you unveil that statue

as a proud symbol of the beauty in everyone.

Tyrannis: No one will buy that. Shlub: I think they will.

I think they'll be inspired by your bravery.

Tyrannis: But what if they aren't?

Stupendous: Then we'll be inspired

by your bravery.

Tyrannis: All right. I'll do it.

You go ahead. I would like to just

touch up one specific area.

[Deliria screaming]

Dr. Paulakis: May I remind you I'm a demigod.

You can't "zap" me. [Deliria screaming]

Deliria: You can't keep anti-zapping me.

You'll eventually run out.

Dr. Paulakis: Uh, yeah, just like

you'll eventually run out of Dr. Paulakis'

Three-in-One Chimera Egg Nighttime Neck Cream

if I stop providing it to you.

[Deliria gasps] You would never!

Dr. Paulakis: I'm serious about

my extracted goops.

Deliria: He's like a son to me,

and as much as I love seeing him like this,

I can't stand seeing him like this.

Dr. Paulakis: Hm. There is one thing you have

that I might trade for your son's smart goo.

Deliria: Don't you ask for it. Dr. Paulakis: I'm asking for it.

Hippocampus: What's he asking for?

Deliria: My goddess goo. It's well known

that the stuff that makes my hair lustrous

can be used to turn a demigod into a god.

It's also an excellent insect repellent

and very good for getting red wine out of white carpet.

Dr. Paulakis: You make me immortal,

I make your son an uggo scientist again.

Hippocampus: But then what happens to my mom?

Dr. Paulakis: She endures an entire day

of terrible hair.

Deliria: Oh, why don't you just kill me?

Hippocampus: But then what happens to my mom?

Tyrannis: People of Krapopolis.

I almost didn't show you

what I'm about to show you,

but a wiser man convinced me

it was not just brave, but important.

Joshua: Is it a clock?

Tyrannis: Huh? No. I was going to

make some phony, idealized

statue of myself, because I didn't think

who I actually am was enough--

or even acceptable.

But I learned something important today.

I learned we need to love ourselves not in spite of,

but because of, our so-called "imperfections."

And that's something we all could stand to learn,

no matter how conventionally attractive we are or aren't.

So, I'm not going to show you some cleaned-up fantasy.

I want you to see your king as he really is.

[Citizens gasping]

Tyrannis: You see, it's inspirational because--

Miriam: No, I get that part.

I mean I follow the reasoning,

such as it is. I'm just sitting here thinking,

"What did we spend on this?"

Tyrannis: This is uplifting. It's a symbol

that everyone is beautiful,

that we should love ourselves.

That's important!

Joshua: As important as a sinkhole?

How much did that huge chunk of marble cost?

That's not cheap. Kayleigh: Also,

did you make the genitals bigger?

I certainly couldn't.

[Laughter, citizens talking at once]

Woman: We have a serious goat problem?

Man: ...it's just stuck on! Tyrannis: They aren't ready.

They can't see the forest for the trees.

Stupendous: I think it's the other way around,

but you could fix that with some clippers.

Dr. Paulakis: OK, Hippo. Say good-bye to your

perfect cheekbones.

Hippocampus: AAaaaAAAHhHHHHhhHhHH!

Dr. Paulakis: Bony wrists. Goony neck.

Congestive heart failure.

Yep, he's normal-looking again.

Hippocampus: And I can tell I'm smarter

because I'm rationalizing away any feeling

of regret about that.

And I know that's what I'm doing,

and I'm able to compartmentalize it.

Yep, I'm back to normal. Do I get to keep my towels?

Dr. Paulakis: Do you think you deserve them?

Hippocampus: No. Deliria: All right,

all right, my turn.

What's all this about?

Shlub: Ty's proud of his body.

Deliria: Well, good for him, I suppose.

Stupendous: What happened to you?

Hippocampus: She sacrificed

her hair for me.

Tyrannis: Wait. I don't see it. It looks the same. Aah!

Deliria: Are you kidding me? It's 20%

thinner in the back!

I look hideous!

And I refuse to live this way.

Um...You'll do. Stand still. King Jorbus: Ahh!

Why? Why me?

My looks are all I have!

My brother got everything else!

Not just the singing voice,

he also does home repair stuff.

Anything, he's just on it.

It's like a sixth sense.

I see a broken doorknob

and I have to hire someone.

Deliria: Thank you. Move along.

Look at the little statue. Be inspired.

Deliria's back!

Narrator: Just as their king predicted,

the citizens of Krapopolis came to appreciate

the natural beauty of their statue.

Krapopolis became a center of--

[Ringtone]

Oh, hang on. David? I need to call you back.

I'm recording a V.O. thing.

Scary man: I've got your boyfriend.

Narrator: What? Who is this?

Scary man: I have your boyfriend.

Come to the door if you want him to live.

Narrator: What? Are you serious?

[Banging on door]

[Inaudible voice] [Bang]

Narrator: Aah! No! What are you--get off me!

Scary man: Stand still! Get this on!

Narrator: You're not putting a hood on me!

Scary man: I said stand still!

Narrator: No! Let go of me!

[Narrator and scary man struggle]

Scary man: What is that, a knife?

Put that down! [Narrator screams]

Scary man: No! Ahh! No! [Narrator screaming]

[Stabbing]

[Narrator breathing heavily]

David: Pippa? Narrator: David? [Breathing heavily]

David: Oh, my God, what have you done?

Narrator: He was going to kill you.

He tried to kidnap me.

David: Yes, we booked that kidnapping experience.

Narrator: That was today? David: Yes!

Narrator: Oh, God! David: Remember?

It was a fake kidnapping? Fun romantic thing?

What the hell did you do?

Narrator: I killed him. David: Oh, I'm gonna be sick.

Narrator: Sh-sh-shhh! Let's just think,

lemme just think!

Get that rug. We need to get rid of the body.

David: Are you serious? Uhh. Narrator: Do it!

[Running footsteps]

Narrator: Krapopolis became a center of

body positivity,

a beacon to the world.

Do we have it? I think we have it.

Gotta go!