Original subtitles

[music]

[grunts] You... Oh, my... What?

Got him.

Hey.

Oh, hey, hey.

OMG, I cannot explain how excited I am.

Really? Thanks. I mean,

it is a new hairstyle. I didn't think it was all that though.

Not to see you, silly.

It's because my big brother is back home.

Duh. I knew that. I was just joking.

No, you weren't.

But I'm so excited and I can't wait for you to meet him.

Oh, yeah, I can't wait to meet him either.

I mean, where's he been? Army? Navy?

Prison.

-What? -Prison.

Prison, prison... Oh, prison!

Prison, like, where criminals go?

Yes, silly, but he's not a criminal.

[scoffs] Yeah. Yeah, right.

So, uh, why'd he, why'd he go?

He beat a man half to death for slapping my butt.

He's very protective of me.

Oh, yeah. [chuckles nervously]

[clears throat] So, uh, how, how long was he there?

Two years this time.

He's been in and out a lot,

but he's not a bad person, though.

It's just bad situations keep finding him.

I feel like it's gonna be different this time.

Oh, good.

He can't wait to meet you.

-Who? -You.

Me? [clears throat] He knows about me?

Yeah. Duh, silly.

Y'all have dinner here every day.

Is it cool if I bring him by to meet you tonight?

Here? Tonight? Today-tonight?

Like upcoming...

Yes, Philip. Today, tonight.

Yeah, yeah, why not? Yeah.

I am so excited. I'll see you tonight.

-See you tonight. -I'm gonna go right now.

Yeah, yeah, can't wait to die... Dine!

Dine, dine with you guys.

I really can't wait. Oh!

You two are literally my favorite guys.

I'll see you tonight, babe.

[Philip] Okay. Bye. All right.

I'm gonna die.

[whimpering]

Oh, no! I'm too young!

♪ No matter what you do, I love you ♪

♪ No matter where you go, I'm behind you for sure ♪

♪ Always remember blood ain't never water ♪

♪ We'll make it if we stay together ♪

[Jeremy] I know that smell anywhere.

Two-day ribs.

Oh, man, I been marinating these babies

for two damn days.

Yes, sir, I remember the first time I had them ribs.

Yeah, I remember too.

Your momma had to pull you away from the rib bone.

You might have to pull me away now.

How long before they done?

It'll be all right. Let's let them cool

and then we can dig in, all right?

Okay. All right. Oh, man,

I remember the family reunion.

People went crazy over them ribs.

Man, these ribs right here do something to you.

Family members be calling me for next two days.

"Can I get some ribs? Can I get some ribs?"

I'ma tell you, I don't care, grandma, grandpa,

they gonna have to pay extra.

I remember you made my mother pay for the ribs.

She gonna have to pay plus inflation.

She don't eat nobody else ribs. Let me get one of them ribs.

Give me one of them ribs.

No, no, they not ready yet. [sniffs]

They're not ready. Let them cool.

-They still hot, man. -Okay.

You know what? We need to get an orange soda.

That's right, we get an orange soda

and white bread.

I'ma let these cool. Then we can bounce.

-You ready? -Oh, yeah, let's go.

Ah, that smells good.

And I told Cora, I said, when she was six,

she wasn't gonna be able to do that.

She didn't wanna listen to me, so she fell off!

[laughter]

That's terrible.

-That's terrible. -Mr. Brown.

Y'all smell that?

Yes, that smells incredible. What is that?

[Brown] What is that?

That is Grandpa Vinny's ribs, y'all.

-Ribs? -[Leah] Yes.

Jeremy been talking about them all day.

Listen, he marinates them for two days

and smokes them for 12 hours.

Oh, well, it smell like it too.

Oh, my goodness.

I'ma get one and taste test.

Ooh, no, no, no. No, no, no.

That's a big deal, okay?

Now, Grandpa Vinny gotta eat them first

or it throws off the whole experience.

Him and Jeremy real weird about it,

so I wouldn't.

Well, come on down. We'll ask them. We'll get one.

-We just wanna taste test. -Yeah, yeah, let's go see.

Come on, come on, let's go see.

-Oh, good. -Okay. Okay.

-[Leah] Okay, okay okay. -[Cora] Lord!

What you doing? Bodybuilding?

'Cause you know I'm always ready when they body-build.

If you do everything straight from your core,

you will wind up building like this.

I don't wanna build like that.

What's wrong with you? Why you so frustrated?

What's wrong?

Look, I'm trying to build muscle for protection.

Protection from what, from who?

Who I need to put these hands on?

No one, yet.

Yet? What you mean yet? What's wrong?

Well, I'm meeting Chilecia's brother

for the first time tonight and he's tough.

Ah, boy, that ain't nothing.

Big brothers always try to act tough,

but truth be told, they ain't that tough.

He went to prison.

Shut up!

He went to prisoner?

What? No! He went to prison!

That's what I said, he went to prisoner!

-No. Whatever! -Yes. Okay.

Well, how long was he in there?

Two years, and he's in and out. In and out.

He was in and out? What'd he go for?

He beat a man half to death for touching Chilecia.

Oh, Lord, you finna die.

Wait, did you touch her?

All the time. [chuckles]

Stop being that.

You gonna need... Do some more pushups!

[Philip] You right. [whines]

Come here, boy, get up.

I'm not finna have you walking right here, scared.

Why you look so scared?

-I do? -[Brown] Yes, you look scared.

You got to learn to at least look tough.

Okay? I'ma teach you Brown's Look Tough class.

I'ma teach you this. When you look this,

won't nobody bother you.

That's why nobody don't touch me and bother me.

Everybody bothers you, though, all the time!

You got one more time before I just go...

[Philip] Okay. Okay.

Do you want me to go off on you?

We're on the same team. We're on the same team.

Look. This is tough.

Put your hands in your pockets.

And look...

Like that.

If you look over to the left,

people will, 'cause they think something wrong with you.

Just look to the left like this.

And do your face,

Make your face go a little in.

Put your face in.

It can't go in no more!

That's what... Never mind. Okay, never mind to look tough.

First thing is, is you got to look intimidizing.

You mean intimidating. Intimidating.

Don't ever interrupt me again.

When I'm teaching you not to be scared,

you don't interrupt me.

Okay.

When you wanna be intimidizing, you walk in the room.

See, when you do it, you glide.

And keep your head on a swivel like that.

You see, like a bobble head.

That don't make you dizzy?

[Brown] Just try the walk.

When you do it, just take your time

and do it, watch my fingers.

You see how I look? You see it?

-Okay. -Okay, you try the walk.

Stop! Stop!

That ain't what I did!

I did, literally did what you did!

You did not do what I...

The fingers and all. I did the fingers.

I did like this.

You did like this.

Now try it again and do it right.

Looking like a shot duck.

Okay, you know what? Never mind.

Never mind. What, is you dancing?

-I was just doing the... -[Brown] Nothing!

-I was doing it rhythmic. -Okay, look.

What I'm about to teach you how to do

is you gonna have to learn how to post up on him.

Oh, post up, yeah.

What are you doing?

It ain't basketball. Post up!

I don't know any other post up.

Like on the... Oh, like on the Who's Bad video.

You know the Who's Bad video?

I don't like that.

Why you doing that? You know the Who's Bad video?

If you don't know, now you know, sucker!

-Who's bad? -This is... No!

Who's bad?

-Stop! -Who's bad?

Let go, man! I'm not bad, I'm dead!

You ain't bad 'cause you ain't nothing.

[music]

Yeah, buddy, let's get to it!

Oh, my goodness, what is going on?

We left the meat right here.

We left it right here.

We didn't move it before we left.

So where the hell is it?

Let me check the fridge.

Might've put it in...

Nothing here.

Nothing.

Oh, my goodness.

You notice how the counter is all cleaned up?

Tell you what? Check the trash

and see if there are rib bones in there.

Empty. Freshly emptied.

Agh. You get my drift?

Clean counters, empty trash.

Yeah, they're covering up the evidence.

That's what it is.

And our meat. Covered it up. Wow.

It had to be Karen.

That means she ate and cleaned up behind herself.

Yeah, and it wouldn't have been Brown

because he wouldn't have cleaned up after himself.

And you know Philip is too damn scared.

So it ain't him.

And Leah wouldn't do that to me.

Well, then Ms. Holy Cora,

who's always saved, wasn't her.

And Anastasia,

she can't eat that much meat.

Too easy.

So that means it's Karen or Anastasia

that's your suspects, huh?

Had to be Karen

because Efe and Reginald were gone.

They weren't even here.

I couldn't wait to put my mouth on them ribs.

Whoever did this gonna pay.

You don't touch a man's meat without his permission.

You know, you ask a man,

"Can I have some of your meat?"

And then, if he says yes,

-you can enjoy his meat. -[Jeremy] Yeah.

You don't just dig in on a man's meat like that.

Especially if you don't warm them up first.

[Vinny] I got a plan. We'll find out.

All right. Here we go.

-Y'all good over there? -Oh, everything looks nice.

Yeah I hope they get it before it get cold.

Ooh, that just looks so delicious.

That is not for you, Mr. Brown!

Cora!

[Cora] What... What are you doing?

Brown, you something else now.

-[Cora] I mean... -What?

They should be here any second. Where's Philip?

Oh. Uh...

He probably hiding from Killer Cain.

Hold on. They're here. Get the door.

[murmuring]

Come on in! It's open!

Cora, they're coming! Hurry up!

How y'all doing? Come on in!

Hi, y'all.

He look like he'll kill. He look like he'll kill.

All right, come on up. Have a seat.

Thanks, Ms. Cora. This is my big brother, Cain.

-Cain, this is Ms. Cora. -Hello.

-Mr. Brown. -What's up?

Ya heard me?

Okay.

Uh, Mr. Jeremy.

[Jeremy] What's up, man? How you doing?

-Good good. -[Chilecia] Mrs. Leah.

-Hi. -Hey.

And where is, uh...

Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo! Philly Phil in the building!

You supposed to jump with me.

It's good, though. Yo, yo, yo.

[murmuring]

-You feel me? Ha! -I feel you. I feel you.

-Ma boy. -Show him the walk.

Show him the walk. Do the walk. Yes!

'Sup, boo.

Uh-uh, ain't nothing up, boo.

Why are you dressed like this?

Oh come on, don't trip on the drip.

You know how I get.

Aha, you feel me?

Okay, well, on that note,

we gonna head on down to the church

and get everything together for tomorrow.

But we'll be back a little bit later.

Okay, Cora. Thank you for everything.

Thank y'all for everything.

And the food smells amazing.

Oh, Cora, he can talk good too. You got all your teeth?

Cora, they didn't knock them out in prison.

[Cora] Stop it.

Uh, Chilecia, Cain, have a seat.

-[Cain] Thank you. -[Chilecia] Thanks, Mrs. Leah.

Thank you so much for joining us for dinner, Cain.

Yeah man welcome to our home.

Uh, I can tell by your tattoos, you're religious.

Oh, yes, sir. God is amazing.

Chilecia always tells me how cool y'all are.

Plus, the food is always the bomb too.

Boom!

Because you said food is the bomb.

Boom, sound of bomb...

Tough crowd.

You and me, living room, now!

Thats a tight grip [mutters]

Boy, have you lost your damn mind?

No, I'm trying to leave a good impression on Cain.

How am I looking?

You look stupid.

You making it worse if anything, man.

What's wrong with the normal Philip?

The normal Philip wouldn't fit in

with somebody that went to prison.

Son, the normal Philip is just fine.

You're funny, smart, kind...

Philip. Philip Washington, what is wrong with you?

I'm just trying to leave a good impression.

Baby, the only people you need to impress

are your mother and father.

Boom.

'Cause what she said was the bomb.

Okay, we see where he gets it from.

So what should I do?

I want you to go in there, change your clothes.

Come back as the normal Philip

and meet your girlfriend's brother.

I agree.

Okay, well, I'll be back.

[Jeremy] My damn food's getting cold.

Now what is all this he got going on?

I don't know.

[music]

Ah, there's my son. Mm-hmm.

You know Cain was just telling us

that he's a gamer like you, Philly Phil.

It's nice to officially meet you, Mr. Cain.

Nice to meet you too, Philly Phil.

Hey, it's just Cain, man. Nice to meet you.

Hey, I heard it's been new graphics

added in the last two years.

I mean, you can POV a helicopter,

see a wide area.

You can jump out and parachute with night vision goggles.

I mean, they even simulate real-life missions.

Oh, man, what?

This technology getting crazy, dawg.

I mean, I can show you if you down later.

I would love that. Oh yeah.

[clears throat] Uh, Cain.

So what do you do for work, man?

[Leah clears throat]

It's okay. I'm a videographer.

He's being modest.

He shoots incredible short films and music videos.

Wow.

I also just got hired to work on my first feature.

-Wow! -[Jeremy] Congrats, man.

He's had a camera in his hand

for as long as I can remember.

Great. That's great.

Well, if you ever need an actor or somethin',

you know what I'm sayin', I hold my own.

All right, man.

I'll keep that in mind.

Uh, Cain, I wanted to apologize for earlier.

Don't mention it, man. I get it.

I can appreciate the effort.

I'm not in a position to judge anybody.

Never will.

You can always be yourself around me, man.

Aw!

Stop. Ya'll cute.

-[Vinny] What's up, everybody? -Hey.

-Ready to do this? -Do what?

Find out who stole our meat.

Let's do it.

Well, what you gonna do when you find out who ate it?

Tell you what we gonna do, girlie.

We gonna send them to the market,

they gonna get four pounds of meat,

then they gonna season it to my specifications.

That's right, and then watch the meat marinate!

For two damn days.

And then they gonna smoke them under his supervision

for 12 hours.

Till the meat is tender.

Falling off the bone.

-We gonna figure it out. -We'll figure it out.

Get to the bottom of this meat thieves.

Oh, my God.

Miss Cora, uh...

What's going on?

Where were you at approximately 11:15 am

-this morning? -[Vinny] Mm-hmm.

I don't know. [murmurs] Oh.

I was, uh, I was in the living room.

I was in the living room with Mr. Brown and Leah.

And right about 11:15.

Okay. Right, well, thank you for your cooperation.

And you know what?

Your hair sure looks lovely today.

-[Vinny] Yeah, it does. -Thank you, Jeremy.

That means you were in the vicinity of the crime.

What crime? What you talking about?

Did you or did you not eat them ribs?

No, I didn't eat no ribs!

You are a liar!

I can see the satisfied look on your face.

It's gonna be there for two days.

No, I didn't eat those ribs!

You a liar!

No, I did not eat those ribs

and you ain't gonna be sitting there, talking about me

in my face like this, calling me no liar!

You a liar! You ate them ribs!

I didn't eat those ribs.

You ain't got no proof! You don't know what I...

-Can you smell barbecue? -Mm-hmm.

I smell barbecue.

Christians will lie now.

-Barbeque and bones. -They will.

You know, if, uh, you tell me who ate the ribs,

I'll go easy on you. I have no problem with it.

I don't know who ate your ribs, Grandpa Vinny.

[chuckles]

Okay, you said, "I don't know

who ate the ribs, Grandpa Vinny."

You did the whole sentence.

You could've just said no.

You could've just said no!

You know what? I want the truth!

You can't handle the truth!

I told you I didn't eat your ribs, Grandpa Vinny!

Whoa, whoa, everybody, relax now, relax.

She said she didn't eat the ribs.

Babe, you look so beautiful today.

You know that? You know that?

Um, Grandpa, she wouldn't do that to us.

She know how I feel about them ribs.

Yeah. Now, you were home this morning, right?

Uh, yeah, I was here.

Okay, cool, cool.

So if you just happened to know

who ate the ribs, you can share that with us,

and we won't say it was you.

We'll say that it was an anonymous tip.

No, I, I don't know who ate those ribs.

That's because it was you!

Ugh, it was not me, Grandpa Vinny!

I told you I didn't eat those ribs!

Now leave me alone!

I'm getting a lie detector test.

We gonna find who ate these ribs!

I am done with this foolishness.

I told you, nobody ate those ribs!

Now leave me alone!

You know what? And you, Jeremy,

can sleep on the couch tonight.

What? What'd I do?

I was being nice.

I'll bring you some ribs out there.

[scoffs]

Y'all walking up on me like y'all wanna do something.

That's because we wanna do something!

Well, let's get to doing something.

Anytime you ready to do something,

we can move these chairs and do it!

Hey, relax, relax, relax.

We're all men here. Great men.

Well, some of us great men

and some of us not so great men.

[Vinny] Whatever, whatever.

If it's your name, if I'm callin' your chain--

-Shut up, Brown! -[Jeremy] No, I got this.

Let him come on over here.

I'll give him a double anointing of this right here.

You don't want none of this.

Does it look like I'm afraid of you?

You look like it.

-Mr. Brown. -[Brown] Uh-huh?

What if I told you that we have two witnesses

that said they saw you

at the scene of the crime

with the ribs this morning?

All I got to say is, hmph!

Hmph, hell, and we also know

that you have a history with meat!

Pause! I don't have no history with meat.

Thank you. Unpause!

[murmuring]

What if I told you that our two witnesses

that they saw you eat the meat

all by yourself?

All by your damn self.

And we have it on record, Brown, that you ate all of the meat

bit by bit by yourself!

-You meat-eater! -[Jeremy] Meat-eater!

-Meat-eater! Meat-eater! -Meat-eater!

I'll tell y'all! I confess, it was me!

But it wasn't me by myself!

Cora and Leah ate some of that meat too.

We were supposed to eat one rib,

but the ribs kept calling my name.

They kept calling my name!

And then we looked and the pot was empty!

[whimpers] Who snitched?

Which one of them snitched on me?

Uh-huh, we got your ass.

He's a meat-eater. Shame on you, Brown.

You sweat sauce!

[music]

Okay.

All right, meat thieves.

We have a brand-new batch of meat

that you guys are gonna prepare

and we gonna cook it

and we gonna eat it in front of your face

so you can feel our pain.

Brown, you on cleaning duty.

That's right, Brown. Clean that meat.

Clean it! Wash that meat, Brown.

Leah, you on drying duty.

Dry the meat, Leah.

Don't wanna see no water on the meat.

I don't want wet meat.

Miss Cora, don't you even think

about going down to the church.

You on seasoning duty.

And Miss Cora, I got a special seasoning duty for you.

I want that meat not too salty,

not too spicy,

and not too sweet. That's right.

-Yes. -[Vinny] Okay.

Wash the meat.

Wash the meat, dry the meat, season the meat.

Wash, dry, season.

Say it with me.

[All] Wash, dry, season.

Say it together!

[All] Wash, dry, season.

The meat!

Wash, dry, season.

The meat!

Say it with me!

[All] Wash, dry, season the meat!

[music]

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