All language subtitles for The.Sex.Lives.Of.College.Girls.S01E08.PROPER.WEBRip.x265-ION265_English_SDH

-(crowd whooping and cheering)
-(players clamoring)

There's just something
about a man covered in paint.

-Mmm.
-Dude, are you studying at a tailgate?

Yeah, but only because I'm failing Econ.

Maybe you'd be doing better
if you didn't spend

-so much time railing Leighton's brother.
-Okay.

(imitating squeaking bedframe)

Bela! You just spilled beer
all over my textbook!

Oh, my God. I'm so sorry.

And Nico's bed doesn't squeak like that.

It thuds. Like bam, bam bam...

Hello, ladies.

-Hi, Leighton.
-Hi, Leighton.

Wait. Why did you stop talking
when I showed up?

Is it my glasses?

I know they're ugly, but my fucking mom
forgot to send my contacts.

No, it's just surprising that you came.

Well, I'm not really jazzed
to watch soccer,

but I did want to come
and support Whitney.

You like Whitney?

Yes, I like Whitney.
She's our roommate.

Do you like me?

I guess. Stop asking me if I like people.
Everyone's fine.

Anyway, I can't stay long.

I have to plan a surprise party
for my brother's birthday.

Oh, my God.

I didn't know Nico's birthday
was coming up. That's so cool.

Yeah. I always plan his party,

and I have some really good surprises
in store this time.

It'd be really great for me

if I could get the Catullan writers in
for an exclusive event.

Yeah, I'm sure my brother would love to
have eight nerdy writers hanging around.

No, plus-ones.

But we are invited.

-Sure.
-(both) Yes!

Great, they're pulling in.

(all cheering)

Oh, my God. It's Whitney! Hey, girl!

(Bela) Whitney!

You came?

Of course we came. We love you!

Also, we ran out of mixers.
Can we have some of your team's Gatorade?

No!

-No worries, we'll see you inside!
-Whoo!

Go, Whitney!

(announcer) And the score is tied 2-2
as we enter overtime.

(cheering)

-Es...
-...sex!

-Es...
-...sex!

-Es...
-...sex!

-Es...
-...sex!

-Es...
-...sex!

-Es...
-...sex!

(man) Let's go!

Hey, do either of you ever get this thing

where you feel like you have to pee
but nothing comes out?

Bitch, you have a UTI!

Oh, my God, no.

Did you forget to pee after sex?

Are you supposed to do that?

Someone didn't read the vagina's manual.

Wait, are you having sex
with someone? Who?

Me, Kimberly Finkle,
having casual sex? That's a laugh.

There are a lot of other ways
to get a UTI.

You probably sat
on a wet library chair for too long.

Right. That's probably it.

Anyway, these cold bleachers
are really helping numb the area.

Just a reminder,
my friend Maya's visiting this week,

so if we could talk less about
infected genitals.

No promises.

-(crowd clamoring)
-Something's happening!

Run, bitch! Run!

(all cheering)

Get the goal!

Go, Whitney, go, Whitney, go!

(crowd groans)

-(grunts)
-(whistle blows)

(all gasp)

Don't take her hand, Whitney.
Slap her in the fucking mouth!

(announcer) Yellow card number 12.
Penalty kick for Essex.

Hey, no pressure,

but if you make this shot,
we go to the NCAA tournament.

Make the damn shot.

You got this.

-Yes.
-Yeah.

(referee) All right, here we go.

Ready?

Await my fire but no one sees.

Let's dream of something away from here

You got this, Whitney!

-Yeah!
-Yeah!

(announcer) The Golden Goal scored

by number 21 Whitney Chase. Essex wins!

(all cheering)

... stop until it's gone

... our eye on the horizon

(clock beeps)

It is 11:00 a.m.

That is 100 community service hours.
I am out of here.

We knew you'd be excited,
so Ginger made you cupcakes!

They're allergen-free,
but full of love and carob chips.

Thank you.

Do you wanna stay
for the rest of today's meeting?

Not at all, actually, but thank you.

Alicia, Ginger, Tova, I will cherish
all of the lessons you have taught me.

And to the rest of you...
I think one of you is named Rebecca.

Oh, both of you.

Don't forget your cupcakes.

You know what, Ginger, I'll take one.

I'm free, bitches!

-Whoo!
-(chuckles)

(Bela) Wow!

One small step for a South Asian woman,
one giant leap...

New writer alert!

Carla? What are you doing here?
Did you get tapped too?

Yeah, I worked really flippin' hard
on my submission.

I guess they really flippin' liked it.

Well, cool.

So fun that you're here.

Ladies first.

(Bela) Holy crap!

This is incredible!

(Carla) Check it out.

This is gonna be me and you one day,
best friends and co-editors.

-I'm gonna take a seat.
-Me too.

(Eric) All right. Come on, guys.
Let's get started.

First off, congratulations
to our new Catullan writers.

(all clapping softly)

I'm sure we're witnessing the start
of some very successful comedy careers.

Until you have kids
and turn into complacent hacks.

It's a tradition for new writers
to submit a piece on their first day.

And in an age-old practice
dating back to... 2013,

the best piece will be featured
on our Instagram.

Pieces are due at midnight.

Maybe it'd be cool
if we wrote something together.

I'm sure that's not allowed.

Evangeline, Bela and I wanna co-write
a piece. Is that cool?

We don't have to. Really, it's--

Sure. Bela and Carla will be writing
one together. You can work in groups.

Shaweet! Very nice. My wife.
Have you seen Borat?

-Obviously.
-I'm sure it's so good.

Never thought that
I could take these steps

But I kept the focus on myself

Your first UTI. I remember mine well.

I had just conned my way
into a birthright trip into Israel.

Thanks, Lila,
but I'm trying to ignore it.

A UTI is a rite of passage.
You gotta wear it like a crown.

Right.

An uncomfortable scratchy crown
that you can't wait to take off.

(all chuckle)

Hey, guys, I seriously have no idea

what to get Nico for his birthday,
and I'm stressing.

Well, I think it's pretty obvious.
You gotta get him a sexy gift.

Oh, like silky boxers?

No. But something erotic.
Like a cock ring.

-A what?
-She's wrong.

Get Nico something nice,
but slightly impersonal,

so he doesn't think
you're trying too hard.

Maybe a nice journal?

A journal? Hot guys don't journal.

They just let their thoughts fade away.
It's what makes them hot.

I just wanna get him something
small and meaningful,

but something I know he'll like.

As long as you pair it with a nasty
handwritten card, something like,

"Happy birthday, Nico. I love
that thick dick. Regards, Kimberly."

Boom. You're welcome. Shakespeare.

Hey! So you going to this party
tomorrow too?

Yeah. Are you?

Nah. I already have plans.

Hanging out with Darius for a bit
and then meeting up with you

-when you leave the party early.
-Oh! Hmm.

-Sound good?
-I might be available for that.

Cool.

So, you guys are gonna work or...

-I am.
-I'm sick. I have a UTI.

Well, good luck with that.

-Thank you.
-Poor baby girl. Drink up.

Hey, you wanted to see me?

Yeah. Come on in.

Let me guess.

After the other night, companies
are reaching out about endorsing me?

I'll hold out for Adidas.

Well, it has come to my attention
that Coach Dalton has been having

an inappropriate sexual relationship
with a player.

What?

That's crazy and gross.

Well, I have to ask. I mean,
do you know anything about this or...

Me? No. I can't even imagine it.

-Dalton's so old, he's still on Facebook.
-(chuckles)

Okay, well, if you hear anything,
let me know.

Obviously, we have
to take this very seriously.

Of course.

I'll think on it and let you know
if anything comes to mind.

I assume you already talked to Becky?

I'm not implying anything,
but I did see them share a PowerBar once.

You are not the first person
to mention that.

All right. Well, that's very helpful.
Thank you.

You can go.

Oh, all right.

Remember to call me when you're

(phone ringing)

Hi, you've reached Dalton. Please leave
a message and I'll call you back.

Shit.

...go on and speak your truth...

Oh, my God. I just thought about
what our piece should be.

Cool. What is it?

What if we write a piece about
what TV characters say when they orgasm?

I don't think we want people
to picture Fred Flintstone getting off.

Right. It's cringey.
I'll think of something else.

No rush. Sometimes the best ideas
take a while to find.

You know you're like the only person
at the Catullan who's nice to me.

I'm sure that'll change with time.

Eric's not that bad.

Eric? The only time I've seen Eric smile
was when I tripped on a cord.

(both chuckle)

Well, he's better than Ryan.

Hey, I have an idea for a piece.

What about a Tinder profile
for the John Essex statue?

Ryan showed me his dick...

in a bad way.

Are you serious?

He called me into his office
to talk about piece formatting,

and then he took it out.

And it's all I can think about
whenever I'm at the Catullan.

-Are you gonna tell anyone?
-I don't know.

Everybody already thinks I'm so weird.

Has he ever done anything
like that to you?

Ryan?

No. Not at all.

Yeah.

Forget I said anything.

Let's write your funny idea.

-Yeah.
-Yeah.

This is for my brother's 21st birthday.

I will need a crepe station option
that is both sweet and savory.

But in my head, in my head

Well, then I will await
your manager's call at this number.

Oh.

You serving me
some rich mommy party planner.

I'm very into that.

Hey, what is with your neighbor
with the red hair?

She was staring at me
while I was waiting at the door.

Oh, she's my best friend. I'm kidding.

I don't talk to my neighbors.
Do you think I'm insane?

Dude, planning a party in Vermont
is challenging.

No one has taste.

Yeah. About that,
am I, like, invited to this or...

I figured you wouldn't wanna go.

And don't you think you coming
as my plus-one

would be like this whole thing?

There it is.

What?

You don't want me there because
you're worried people will figure you out.

Hey, it is a birthday party for my brother
who you have met, like, once.

Okay, can we please not make this
into a bigger thing than it has to be?

It's not about the party.

I just want to know that you and me
can exist outside of this one room.

-We can.
-Okay.

Cool. Well, this got weird.

I'm gonna go.

I'm gonna text you later, okay?

Sure.

You say you can't hold anything back,
it's a habit

You say what's on your mind, hmm

Whatever's on your mind, hmm

Willow, I am freaking out.

Yeah, I would be too. This shit is crazy.
Have you talked to Dalton?

No, he's not answering
any of my calls or texts.

Both on my phone or on this burner
I just bought.

You bought a burner?
Whitney, what the fuck?

You're going full-blown Homeland.

What was I supposed to do?

I can't have this come out.

"Black senator's daughter has
inappropriate relationship with coach."

That gets aired on Fox News.

Okay, you're not wrong.

Like, I would watch that.
But I think you can chill.

I talked to Coach Woods and she thinks
Dalton was sleeping with Jena.

Jena? Why would she think that?

Because I told her I thought it was Jena.
She didn't mention you once.

Did you find out
where this is coming from?

Apparently, Dalton's wife called her when
she found a box of condoms in his car.

And a Google search on his iPad

that said, "Is it illegal for a coach
to sleep with a player?"

God, he's such a fucking idiot.

Well, you weren't fucking him
for his amazing brain.

But you just need to lay low,
and this will blow over.

There's nothing pointing to you.

Wow, thank you so much for helping me
with my chemistry homework!

I understand covalent bonds now.

-Relax. She already knows.
-Oh.

The head coach found out Dalton
was sleeping with someone on the team.

Shit. Do they know it's you?

No, you're the only two people who do

and I trust you both/will murder you
if you say anything.

Okay, but having witnessed
some white-collar crime over the years,

if I were you, I'd reset my phone to
factory settings and wipe my hard drive.

She doesn't need to do that.

-I already did both.
-Smart girl.

So you rich people are just naturally good
at covering shit up, aren't you?

-Yes.
-Yeah.

Got a little bit of sunshine

I'm not always such a downer doll

Kinda landed in a goldmine

Ever since I had the good times roll

How's the studying going?

Good. Productive. I like it.

Have you... earned a break?

I want you on top... 'cause my arms
are kinda wrecked right now.

(chuckles)

Okay.

But can I ask you something first?

What's up?

You play guitar.

Hypothetically speaking, would a gift card
to, like, a guitar website

be a birthday gift you'd be excited about?

You don't have to get me a gift.

Are you kidding?

Gift-giving is in the Finkle DNA.

Did you not see my mom slinging around
purse hooks at Parents Weekend?

Your mom's cute, but seriously,
you don't have to give me a gift.

Okay, let's do it, but let's be quick,

'cause I have a lot of work
I have to catch up on.

-Hey, Siri, set me a timer for 45 seconds.
-(chuckles softly)

I'm not

'cause I've soul

Where you go lie, why not just soar?

And for a while, I'm on a roll

Well, I'm loving those eyes,
that's all I know

Are you just now getting home?

Wait, is this a walk of shame?

So you are sleeping with someone?

I mean, is it a walk of shame
if I stayed up all night in the library

hooking up with my textbook?
Like... (exclaims)

We are so different.

Are you excited for the party tonight?

I'm so excited,
I bought a new outfit for it,

and these footpad things
that make fancy shoes more comfy.

Okay, I'm gonna grab my towel
to shower to wake myself up.

Okay. Oh, when you go in the bathroom,

my friend Maya is in there,
the one who's visiting.

Oh, fun. My friend Kelsey from home
wants to visit at some point.

She's, like, really into anime.

I look forward
to discussing that with her.

-So what was your idea?
-So basically there is...

Okay, everyone, I have two announcements.

The first is for everybody.

-Jeff, use spell check.
-Okay.

Secondly, Carla has decided to quit.

-What?
-Yeah.

Wait, why would she quit?

Who knows?
Unlike every other conversation

I've ever had with her,
she didn't go into detail.

(all laugh)

Anyway, now's the moment
you've all been waiting for.

The announcement of which new writer's
piece will be featured on our Instagram.

Which is an account followed
by multiple Emmy-nominated writers.

And the winner is...

the John Essex Statue's Tinder Profile
written by Bela Malhotra.

-Thank you.
-(all clapping)

But I actually co-wrote
that piece with Carla.

She said in her email it was mostly you,
so, enjoy that sole credit.

All right, we're done here.
Good job, guys.

All right.

Congrats.

Bela, oh, my gosh. So proud of you.

Hey, nice work.

Holy hell! Are you Maya?

You're gorgeous.

I'm Kimberly.
I'm one of Leighton's roommates.

Nice to meet you, Kimberly.

Seriously, you smell like a fancy spa.

Sorry to double compliment.

I didn't sleep much last night,
and my brain isn't fully working yet.

Ooh, sounds like you had a fun night.
Get it, girl.

I did get it, and then some.
I have a hickey on my boob.

My boyfriend gave me one of those
when we first started dating.

What's with these guys?

Right? Hey, I need to go help Leighton

set up for this party,
but I'll see you there?

Totally.

Yeah, let me see you go to town, yeah

Go down, go down, go down

Yeah, yeah

Baby, why don't we go to town?

Yeah

(phone chimes)

Let me see you go to town, baby

Go to town, yeah

Baby, let me watch you go to town

If you want a chance, baby...

Yeah, yeah

Go down, go down, go down

Yeah, let me see you go to town

Go down, go down, go down

Yeah, let me see you go to town

Go down, go down, go down

Yeah, let me see you go to town

Bela - 8:52 PM

Hey Carla. There's something
I want to talk to you about.

Go to town with it
and she shaved it all off

Charlie Brown with it

Looking all around
all the other girl sound fishy

Hey, are you ready to black out
with your rack out or whatever it is

-you're always saying to us?
-Yeah, let's do it.

Let's crunk out with our junk out.

Yeah!

(Kimberly) I'm wearing underwear
that's so sexy, it's insane.

Also, it kind of hurts.

Come on now

Let's go, come spread the...

...baby I need you

Those are a lot of gifts.

The only thing my friends got me for
my last birthday was a Chipotle gift card.

Holy shit.
Did someone buy him a snowboard?

I got him sour candy,
because I know he likes sour candy.

That's really sweet.

I need a drink, stat.

Hell, yes. Let's get shots.

I need to start with a glass of water.

I have to take my UTI medicine
and the pill is so huge.

Hey, they just pulled up.

Everyone, quiet. He's here.

Okay, everyone, shut up. Be quiet.

Come on, he's coming. Shh!

(Nico) Are we almost there?
This blindfold does not smell good.

-(all) Surprise!
-Oh, shit!

This is amazing!

Leighton, this is so cool of you.

-Happy birthday, bro.
-Oh, man.

And I have one more surprise for you.

Surprise, babe!

Maya? You're here.

I flew in from Barcelona for you.
Happy birthday.

(all) Ooh!

-Kimberly, hey.
-Did you guys know?

Oh, my God. No.
I would have told you.

I didn't know either.
I'm so sorry.

Kimberly, can we talk for a minute?

Dude, I cannot believe you.

I'm Bela, by the way.
We've met a few times.

I enjoy your parties
and hope to keep coming to them.

But on a personal level, I think you suck.

Yeah. You're a prep school douchebag

who thinks he can get away
with anything he wants.

Can I talk to Kimberly alone for a minute?

It's okay. You guys go back inside.

We're watching you, bro.

Sleazeball. (whispers) Thanks again
for the invite.

Sleazeball!

-I can explain.
-Nico, this is so fucked up.

-Don't be like that.
-Don't be like what?

Heartbroken that the first guy I met
in college has a secret girlfriend.

Maya has been studying abroad.

She wasn't even supposed
to be back until January.

So you were going to tell me, you were
just going to wait several more months.

-Cool.
-Look, it got out of hand.

I don't know what to say.

Well, I do. Fuck you.

I wasted two months on you.

My grades are in the fucking trash.

And I have a UTI and it's fucking
burning down there right now.

Okay, I'm done.

And now I'm about to cry, too. Fuck!

Kimberly, please.

(music playing)

(people chattering indistinctly)

Are you sure you want
to be here right now?

Definitely.
I want to stay here and ruin his night

and make him think that I might say
something to his actual girlfriend.

Damn, girl.

Okay, actually, on second thought,
I think I'm gonna go.

But I don't want to make this
some big dramatic exit.

So, please, the two of you stay.

What the fuck?

Do you think my boobs have gotten bigger
since the beginning of college?

They feel bigger.

Hey, Whit. Hey, can I talk to you
for a sec, in private?

Would you mind getting us drinks?

Gladly.

Dude, there's trouble.

Apparently, our bus driver
told Coach Woods

they saw Dalton kissing a player.

Okay.

A Black player. And we're the only two
Black girls on the team.

Fuck!

I think you need
to talk to Coach, like, now.

Just come clean and hope for the best.

Okay. Yeah, I got to go do this.

Carla - 10:15 PM

Gonna miss hanging with you,
but hope you have fun!

You've to live like this...

One sec.

Dude, you okay?

Yeah. Why do you ask?

Because you're staring
at your phone like a psycho.

Leighton, I think I fucked up
and I don't know how to fix it.

Can I interest you ladies in some shots?

Dude, fuck off.

What happened?

You know that guy Ryan
who showed me porn?

He kinda got me alone the other day

and then pushed his dick up
against my back.

Oh, my God.

I laughed and brushed it off,

but then I found out that he did it
to this other girl, too.

And when she told me about it,
I lied to her and stayed quiet.

And I think I silenced her.

It's okay, okay?

Did you just hug me?

I already regret doing that.

Come on, let's go.

Come on.

You got another thing going
thinking it's gonna be easy

We are so high

Where is down?

Hi. Are you...

Her wife? Yes, I am.

Gert, you got a visitor.

Coach, I promise you, it is totally over.

We ended things weeks ago.

So, if there's any way we could
just forget about this...

-Whitney--
-Coach, please.

My mom is a public figure,
and if this gets out...

My stories don't go away
the way other people's do.

Chase, I already gave my statement.

All right?

I told them I couldn't give a name.

It's none of their business.

You're 18.

You don't need this following you around
for the rest of your life.

Thank you.

Thank you so much.

Canaan, we're leaving.
Are you coming with or not?

Yeah, let's go.

You really gotta cut down
on your screen time though,

'cause you're literally always
on that thing, which is kinda sick.

-Hey.
-Thank you for coming.

Yeah, of course.

Hey, guys, my name is Alicia,
and I know that this is very scary,

but you're totally safe here.

No matter what you say,
I'm your ally, okay?

I'm your ally.

So they say...

They say your name

... it's a shame

The hail turned to rain

Ain't coming down

And as far as we go...

Hey, Whit.

All right, ladies. Gather up.

I'm Coach Hansen,
the women's ice hockey coach.

Now, I can't go into details,

but Coach Woods and Coach Dalton
have been dismissed.

-What?
-I'll be leading you through

the rest of the tournament.

Now can someone explain to me
how off-sides works in soccer?

Anyone?

Her heart is beating

Through her chest

Hesitate to pull the trigger she wants to

Like a bullet

Through the shadows

Contemplating the sense of
what's right or wrong

She never got to tell you that

And said she was in chains

She never acted like it's all in vain

And everybody else
is only playing by the rules

She always wanted to keep the cool

She always wanted to keep the cool

She is burning

Through the shame

She's dying

She's dying

Through the shadow

Through the shadow.