Original subtitles

We've just had a load of walk-ins, so the place is rammed. Cool.

Who've you got looking after Liam's table?

I'm going to put Robyn on it but I am floating.

Yeah, good. I need your eyes on it tonight.

Everything needs to be perfect. They're my VIP's.

Everyone's a VIP, Dean. "Everyone's a VIP, darling!"

Right we're going to smash it, come on.

This programme contains strong language.

Check on, table eight - one scouse, two cod, one pork. Yes, Chef.

All right guys, guys can you listen up!

Our special guests have just arrived

and we've had a load of walk-ins, so we are full.

Oh, all right, then. Now word is getting out there

and that is because of every single one of you guys.

Your food, your dedication, your passion on those plates.

I am so proud of you.

So keep pushing forward and let's do what we do.

ALL: Yes, Chef! Yes, come on!

Ah, sorry about that. Where we at?

Er, scouse and terrine, table 14.

Watch your back. Oxtail.

Service, please. So, where's this new CDP?

He said he's on his way. You sure? Yeah.

Carly, we can't have another no-show.

We're going to be screwed tonight.

Look, even if he doesn't show, we're sweet,

It's me and you. Dream team. Are we, yeah?

Yes. Come on. All right, I trust you. You should.

Camille! Terrine! Yeah, one minute.

Chef, is this new kid coming in or, or are we getting stood up again?

Oh, no, we're not talking about your love life here, Bolton. Oh, wow!

Wow, do you know what it is, right, yous are just jealous cos

I've got a bird and I'm seeing her tonight and you're going home alone.

Oh, my God, Bolt, are you seeing her again?

I am seeing her again, yeah. Is that not twice in one week?

It is twice in one week. Nah, you're not, shut up.

Yeah, I am! That's a lot. Can't keep her hands off me.

Camille watch them croquettes, lad, yeah?

You watch you croquettes, lad. Camille! Yes? Terrine!

OK, OK. Gis your best Scouse accent, Camille. What?

I said gis your best Scouse accent.

"Gis your best Scouse accent."

That's better, that's all right, that's not bad.

Just say, "Finger lickin' chicken."

What? Finger lickin' chicken.

LAUGHTER

You guys... Nearly, nearly. It was all right, that.

Terrine. Thank you.

Chef, this is Johnny. He's here for his first shift.

I'm sorry. Nice of you to actually turn up, by the way lad, thank you.

Let him in the door first. Really sorry, there was a lot of traffic.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, no, it's fine.

Sorry, yeah.

OK, look, we're going to have to dive straight in

because it's madness out there.

Er, I don't have time to do a full talk. So, quick intros.

This is our incredible sous, Freeman.

I'd be lost without him.

Over here we have the wonderful Camille on starters and garnish.

Johnny. Nice to meet you.

Literal Earth angel Emily, head of pastry.

You all right, darling, how you doing? Yep, not bad.

And one of our rising stars of the kitchen, Jamie, demi CDP.

And here we have Scouse - sorry, Bolton, meat and fish.

Do I not get any, like, adjectives, no?

Mm, grumpy? Err, handsome.

Debatable. Talented. Mm, hairy?

Fair enough, I'll go along with that one.

Bolton is our master baster. ALL: Ohhh!

Get on, Chef, get on the jokes, there.

No, crack on, lad, crack on.

Erm, so here we have Holly and Jake, our KPs and general life-savers.

Nice to meet you, bro. All right?

Cool, so that's our merry band. OK.

The staffroom is over there if you want to pop your whites on,

come straight back. Oh, erm, hold on a sec.

Camille, how we doing on hollandaise?

Like, six portions left.

Cool, so when you come back, I want you to jump straight onto that.

About two litres, beef fat, not butter.

OK. Yeah? Beef fat, not butter.

Yeah, you got it? Yeah, cool, cool. Err, "Yes, Chef."

Sorry! Yes, Chef. All right, OK. Quick, quick.

Service! BELL RINGS

PHONE CHIMES Search hollandaise recipe.

AUTOMATED VOICE: I found this on the web for hollandaise recipe.

Egg yolk, tarragon...

Oh, hi. Hey, how you doing?

You OK? You lost? No, I'm Johnny.

Sorry, um, Chef told me to come in here to get changed, so...

OK, well... I'm Robyn, nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you.

MUSIC AND CLAMOUR

Hey, how's the food? How is everything? Lovely thank you.

Amazing. Can I get you a glass of wine? No, I'm good, thank you.

OK, I'll take this for you, then. Thank you.

Excuse me! Hi. Can I have some more pepper, please?

Yeah, I'll get that now.

Are you all right?

No, I'm not.

Ah-ah! Hi. You need to stop that.

What did I do? You need to stop that right now.

I didn't do anything. You did, and you know you did.

And then the problem is that I get frisky,

and I get told off for it, even though it's your fault.

Sounds like your problem.

Hey, Billy, leave her alone. She started it.

Hi. Table six asked for their bill about ten minutes ago

and this is me just telling you. Great.

Well, I'll do that now, then. Soz, pal.

Those aren't the drinks for Liam. Mus?

Mus, Mus, Mus, Mus, Mus, Mus, Musa.

Musa. Yes, my love? Liam's table, please.

Go. Liam's table. Be charming.

I don't have any.

You can do it. You can do it, come on. It's Liam's table, man.

Here we are.

That's your very special negroni. OK. Thank you.

And two old-fashioned. Lovely.

For you, sir, and for you, sir.

And, by the way, sorry there was a bit of delay,

but I'm sure it's going to be worth it, yeah? Perfect.

Err, shall I call Robyn to take the rest of your order?

Oh, no, we're still waiting on a couple of people. Yeah.

Um, so if you could let Carly know for me?

Yeah, of course. And if we could have some of those olives?

That'd be great. Olives? Perfect. Olives. Yes, boss.

Kit, are you going to the kitchen?

Yes, sir.

So Liam's bank buddies, the rest of them haven't arrived yet.

So let them know, so they can chill. OK.

And they want olives.

OK. Yeah, olives? Yeah, I know.

Does olives make you smile?

Um, Carly, some of Liam's rich friends have not turned up,

so the order's going to be a bit delayed.

But can they have some olives, please? Olives?!

OK, all right, all right.

Er, gum, bin. Yeah. Sink. Wash your hands.

Sorry.

OK, Chef, shall I just get started on the sauce, yeah?

Yeah, just roll your sleeves up for me.

Sorry? Sleeves. Oh, sorry. Roll up.

Um, everything you need should be in the dry store at the back.

If you've got any problems, just shout one of the team.

Yes, Chef. Yeah?

TIMER BEEPS

PAN SIZZLES

Sorry, is it all right if I work over here?

Hmm? Oh, yeah, of course.

Erm, do you know where the mixing bowls are?

Yeah.

Just down here.

Thank you. You're welcome.

Jake, Holly, hot pan over here.

All right, one cod, two salmon, one beef, one pork.

Table seven. Yes, Chef!

Oh, you all right, love?

Yeah, um, I'm just getting started on the mayonnaise.

The... Sorry. Hollandaise!

The hollandaise, hollandaise.

Can you pass me those piping bags, please, darling?

Oh, no. The blues ones.

Oh, sorry, piping bags.

And you'll get used to that lot out there. Yeah, I know.

Where did you work before? Do you know where the eggs are?

The eggs? Yep, we keep them in the fridge, here.

Thank you.

Easy, boss man. Hey, how you doing? Yeah.

Sweet. Um, what was your name, again?

Jake. Jake, Jake, sorry do you know where the eggs are?

Ahh.

Ah, thanks.

You're welcome, just... Thank you, man. Is that OK, yeah?

Yeah, this is fine. OK? Cheers. No worries.

Jake!

BELL RINGS Service!

Service, please, man!

Bolton. Johnny sorry, you good? Yeah, yeah.

It's fine, it's fine.

I'm calling out but no-one's fucking coming,

it's going to melt, the ice cream is going to be ruined. It's all right.

Jamie, Jamie, breathe. I'll sort it. Please! Don't stress, don't stress.

Holly, I'm sorry, bro.

Oi, they're loving your rhubarb thing, look.

I don't even have to wash that one, they've licked it clean.

You still have to wash it though, yeah?

Yeah, obviously I will, you nutter.

Jesus! Is she new?

"They!" Fuck sake.

How we doing, team?

Oi! You, out!

You, fired.

Looking great out there, team.

Lots of happy customers.

Looking really pleased, absolutely smashing it today, yeah?

Yeah? Carly, can I have a quick word?

What, now? Yeah.

OK. Um, you good?

Not really. Go on, go on. I'll be two secs.

Everything all right?

Yeah, they're absolutely loving Billy's cocktails.

And those olives are absolutely delicious.

OK. And I was just thinking, when our mains come out,

you could come out with them.

Cos they're going to want to talk to you about the menu and stuff.

Yeah, all right, yeah. And I just need you to take care

of the order personally tonight. Of course. Because...

Yeah, yeah.

Because they need to taste YOUR food.

Yes, Liam. This is your... Liam!

Yeah. I know. It's got to be you.

All right, are you sure everything's all right?

Cos you seem a little... Yeah, yeah.

No, yeah, I'm good, yeah.

Listen to me. Look at me.

It's absolutely buzzing out there.

This is the best night for them to come.

Trust me, all they need to do now is taste the food... Your food.

It's a done deal. Yes, it's a done deal, I'm telling you.

They're going to invest. Yeah. I can feel it.

All right. You go do your thing. Yeah, all right, see you out there.

PHONE RINGS Service!

SHE SIGHS

OK.

Carly, is everything all right with Liam?

Yeah, yeah! Sure? Yeah, lovin' it.

OK.

Ah... Right, you OK?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm fine.

Um, you just go out there, sit down, take table 13.

It's free, get yourself a pint, and put your feet up, y'know?

Oh, Freeman, Freeman. Yeah? I've got something for you.

Oooooooh...

OK. All right!

Check on, two artichokes, no goat's cheese on one, one beef,

one cod, no chowder on the cod!

ALL: Yes, Chef!

HE COUGHS

HE COUGHS AND WHEEZES

VOICE ECHOES: Don't tell me I don't understand.

I'm here covering your arse every single day, Andy!

I can't take it any more.

I want to stop. I really want to stop.

You don't do the orders! You don't do the prep!

You don't give a fuck about us!

You fucking come in stinking of booze.

You're a fucking...

He's collapsed!

OK, so, what's the word for like a final dance at school,

where everyone gets dressed up in the... A prom.

A prom, OK.

So we're at the prom and my boyfriend at the time was

going to have an accidental baby with my best friend.

But also with two other girls he's cheating...

Sorry, I'm not having that, rewind that one back a sec, he done what?

He was going to have an accidental baby with my best friend.

But he was with me. An accidental baby?

An accidental baby. You say that like it's normal.

Like it's normal to have an accidental baby.

No, come on. Sorry, sorry, go on, go on!

OK, so my boyfriend is cheating with four different girls, OK?

That part's not important. Ah, that's horrible.

Don't speak to him ever again, by the way.

No, Bolton, come on. We're French it's not a big deal, no?

You guys are so uptight.

So, um, we do the whole, err...

You know, vote for your friends - best-looking, best personality...

And then there is best couple.

He is nominated four times.

So everyone knew he was an asshole! OK. Everyone knew.

All right, OK, so what happened after that?

Oh, no, I think that's it, Bolton.

Oh, sorry, that's the end of the story?

Ah, mate, I thought that was going somewhere.

No, come on. Oh, no, it was funny.

I mean, I'm laughing on the inside.

Va chier, Bolton!

T'es bilingue? How funny in Turkish?

Tu parle Francais?

I can, I can just about speak English, mate.

Tu parle Francais? Quoi?

Tell us it in French then, mate.

No, cos you won't understand, Bolton, come on.

It'll be...it'll be fucking hilarious then. Aww.

Don't listen to them. Leave her alone now. Only messing, mate.

MOCKINGLY SCOUSE: "I'm only messin', mate!"

LAUGHTER

That's what I hear. Exactly, that's what I hear when you speaking.

Check on, one salmon, one artichoke, no goat's cheese on that one,

one beef, one cod. All going out together, please.

Yes, Chef! Oui, Chef.

All right, me little Scouse mouse, where we at? Eh, thanks, lad.

Eh, I'm just going to sort table's 13's mackerel out now.

I've got two beef resting

and making space for Liam and his table when you need me, yeah?

Nice one. Hollandaise, only five portions left.

OK. Thanks, Jamie.

How long on my veg?

Eh, one minute.

Make it 30 seconds, please.

Mum, you all right?

Bolton, I'm not going to ask you again. How long on my beef?

No, if you're all right... No, Mum, I can't chat. I'm at work.

Freeman!

Right, two mussel, two cod. Nice and easy. Yes, Chef!

Mum?

Mum, I will call you when I finish. I don't know.

About midnight, all right? OK? Right, bye. ALARM BEEPS

Hi, gents, are you ready to order, or...?

Er, yeah, yeah. I think we are. You need more time? Are you guys...?

Yeah? Amazing. Yeah, what the hell's this erm, "lobscouse"?

Oh, the lobscouse, er, so it's got lamb, potatoes...

No, er beef, potatoes, onions, carrots...

Right, so, it's just, it's a stew, then?

Part of our "Northern influence" that I was talking about.

Yeah. "Point North".

Right, OK, so there's no lobster? No. Oh, fuck it!

In that case, I'll go for the beef and the mussels

and the chips, please, darling. Wonderful.

Oh, my God, oh, my God!

You fucking joking? I'm so sorry! I'm sorry!

Please be careful. Be careful of the glass.

Sir, are you OK?

Do I look like I'm OK? Is it her first fucking day, is it?

Fucking joke.

I need you to get me some blue roll and a wet cloth. We're good, OK?

I am so, so, so... Oh, no, no, no don't rub it - you'll go blind.

Blot - if you just blot it.

Jake, this looks like shit! What you playing at?

Looks like shit? I've been working for four hours.

Four hours? I was here till three in the morning. It was spotless.

You were here until three in the morning cos you're lazy.

I will slap you, you cheeky git. I will.

Now, pass me that, pass me it. What? That.

When you coming round, anyway?

I don't see you any more outside this gaff. I'm coming soon.

When's soon? Just got to check my diary and see when I can fit you.

Oh, sorry, I'll make an appointment. Busy guy. Move that over.

Carly, Freeman, backs. I've got duck, duck, duck.

There you go, be careful. Thank you.

OK.

BELL RINGS

Service!

Jake, clear this pass, please.

Obviously, I'm going to comp this meal,

we're going to get you some drinks. I've got a great dry cleaner...

I'm so sorry. Yeah.

She needs some training or something, that's not...

They're going to take care of it. It's not good enough.

I have a good dry cleaner.

If we can't get it cleaned, I will replace the shirt.

Please be careful on that. You all right? Yeah, yeah I'm fine. OK.

My God, we've had a spillage!

Kit Kat's just poured a glass of red wine over that guy sitting there.

He's wearing a white shirt! Jamie, stop looking!

All right, wind your necks in. Is he all right, Dean?

I've had to comp the meal.

Carly! He looks like he's been fucking shot!

He was gonnae kick aff!

Jamie, can you stop fucking around with the ice cream?

MOBILE BUZZES

What is going on tonight, Carly? Yeah, yeah.

I know.

Hiya. Look, you can't...

Hang on.

You can't keep call...

What'd you mean, "a funny turn"?

Freeman? Oh, man. Yeah?

Where's she gone, lad? I don't know, phone keeps ringing.

OK, another beef, another venison.

It's table 12. Yes, Chef!

Camille, how long on that artichoke?

Four minutes.

Thank you.

One venison, one pumpkin. Table one.

Yes, Chef! Yeah.

Is this water on?

So, you're fine?

You're fine, you're sure? Yeah, yeah, your speech sounds fine to me.

Chef, I've just taken Liam's table order. So that's going to be incoming. OK, thanks, Robyn.

There's your two mussels. OK, great. Thank you.

Which is it? Is it your arm or is it your leg?

What... Oh, God!

Right, hollandaise sauce - how long?

New kid, come on. Mate, mate, I've got him. It's fine, it's fine.

Just give me, just give me a number, lad!

Guys, guys, guys, we've got Liam's order through

and he's with VIPs, and I mean V-I-V-I-Ps tonight, OK?

So there's two oysters, one beetroot, two pork,

and then we got four mussel, one artichoke, one duck, one cod,

two beef and three chips. Three chips - we got that?

Yes, Chef! Yes? OK.

Bolton, I'm going to finish this off. Where do you want him?

Lad, jump on the grill and don't mess anything up, yeah? Yes, Chef.

If the weakness gets worse, just call me back

and if you need it, you've got your emergency button.

Mum, we've been through this.

You open the app and you press the big red button.

Fuck! Get it together, man!

Jay, grab that pan for us there, lad.

ALARM BEEPS

Yeah, I...

Carly, I need you now. I've got to go, I've got to go. Bye.

I'm going under. I know, I'm sorry, I'm coming.

And we just had Liam's table come in.

Here, take that.

OK.

OK, check on!

# Everybody, get on the floor

# Do your thing... #

This has to be perfect!

# Whatever it is

# Get on the floor... #

How long on the artichoke, Camille?

30 seconds. Make sure nothing goes out without me checking it, right?

Dill sauce, please.

I just want perfection!

Good? Yeah.

Service?

Cool.

Billy? Someone's saying this isn't lemonade, it's soda water.

I thought they were bullshitting,

so I snuck a taste on my way here, and it's definitely soda water.

That's lemonade.

That, no, that smells like nothing. It's soda water.

They're up my arse now, Billy, yeah.

Just, just don't mess up, yeah? Don't mess up.

First of all, that's lemonade.

Second of all, every time YOU screw up, I've always got your back.

I, I never mess up, yeah?

Guys! A customer's just ruined the Text My Ex finale.

No! Kiki won!

Right, we're going out tonight.

I'm DYING for a drunk kebab, y'know?

Kit Kat? Yes? Drink after work?

Fuck, yes, please! No, no, my head's banging.

Mus, you are not invited for a drink

because you're horribly hungover at work.

OK, no, first off, I don't want to go.

Second of all, I have a headache that's kind of killing me, yeah?

Do you have, er, paracetamol, Billy?

No, because we're grown-ups - we don't come to work hungover! Move!

I need, I need medicine. Mus, go, away. Cover your section.

Get out my sight. Ouch, Dean!

I need health insurance here. Get!

Billy, I've got a present for you.

What?

Two strawberry daiquiris.

INDISTINCT BACKGROUND CHATTER

MOBILE ALARM

Shit! What the heck is that?

One minute, one minute.

RINGING TONE

'The person you are calling is unable to take your call.' Oh, shit!

OK, one pork.

Two pork. Table one.

Pick up, pick up, pick up.

Table five. One beef, one mackerel. Yes, Chef.

SHE EXHALES

Freeman, Freeman! Come here.

All right, you're going to tell me what's going on. I've got to go.

Whoa, whoa! Carly, where you going?

I've got to, I've just got to go out, and...

What do you mean, you've got to go out?

Carly, it's fucking manic in there! Freeman, it's my mum, all right?

There's a medical emergency. I can't get hold of her.

I need to go and make sure she is OK.

Hasn't she done this to you before?

I mean, can't you send a neighbour or something?

Honestly, it's quicker if I just go.

Er, I need you to get Camille on the pass.

Um, the lobscouse needs filling up. Make sure you...

What about Liam and the investors? You've got this.

Oh, Carly! Just, I'm at the end of the phone.

You can call me any time, and I will be back as soon as I can.

All right, go on. Do your thing. Thank you.

All right, guys, listen up, listen up. Carly's had to leave.

What do you mean, she had to leave? Don't ask.

So, um, where's Camille? She's in the storeroom.

All right, Bolton, you come and help me on the pass.

Jamie, I need you between starters and pastry,

and new boy, you keep your ears open, anyone needs anything, you get in there, yeah? Yes, Chef!

All right, guys, we got this, yeah? ALL: Yes, Chef!

How you finding your overheads?

Er, yeah, they're very manageable.

I mean, it's more than we expected, obviously, but...

Nah, it's always the way with this industry, mate. Yeah.

What's going on with your, erm, ROIs?

Yeah, we're on track to meet them.

Brilliant. Liam, these croquettes are lovely. Yeah. Very nice.

You eating them oysters?

You going to eat that one? Mm.

What do you think?

That is interesting, isn't it? Yeah.

OK. You take one. Take that.

Onions, Bolton.

New kid? Onions, lad.

Onions!

They were on the grill. Come on, where are they? Err...

Come on, lad.

You all right? Yeah.

All right, two cod, table two!

Er, new kid? Give us two beef, lad, yeah? Er, yes, Bolton!

Yes, Chef! Sorry.

Where are we going here? Table two.

Come on, lad. Yeah, I'm on it!

You look like shit, bro. My head's going to fuckin' explode, man.

Does anyone have paracetamol?

Hey, Bolton, do you have paracetamol?

Tell you what I could do, lad, I could give you a prescription

for someone who gives a shit, if you want. What's so funny? Bless ya.

Want a little lie-down?

No, I'm not OK, actually. It's a fucking nightmare out there, man.

Oh, is it a nightmare, is it, lad? Jake, do us a favour lad, slap him.

Are you serious? Just give him a little slap.

Slap me! Oh, oh, oh, oh, “I'm Bolton, I'm cutting meat.

"Oh, my life is so fucking hard!"

"Oh, look at me, I'm going to fucking die."

Guys, guys, guys! Stop crying about it. Guys, guys!

You, Musa. Mus! Your section is a mess. Out!

Right now! You are getting on my last nerve, boy.

Good lad, yeah?

Where's Chef? She's left.

Er, Liam wants to talk to her.

Yeah, well, Liam can't talk to her, because she's left.

OK, erm, am I taking this one?

Yeah, take that and tell Liam there's nothing I can do about it.

I'm sorry, Robyn.

Robyn, I can't do anything about it!

Come on. OK, yeah, I'm going.

Liam, she's left, what do you want me to say? She's left? Yes!

What the fuck do you mean, "she's left?" It's a personal thing.

Where the fuck has she gone, Freeman?

Her mum's not well, OK? Happy? Jeez!

Service! BELL DINGS

Look, Freeman knows what he's doing.

They don't want to talk to Freeman, Carly,

they want to talk to the head chef.

I'll be back as soon as I can. Well, when?

About an hour.

What am I supposed to tell them until then?

Yes, Liam, yes, I am.

I'm well aware, Liam.

Eh, lad, you got 12 portions of beef.

Er, hang on, erm... Oh, no, no, ignore me.

It's sound.

What the fuck?!

Going to need that pasta soon.

Yeah, it's ready in two minutes, Freeman.

Oh, Abbs, yes, can you take that one and that one please, darling?

Thank you very much. More beef.

Jamie, open this, please!

Fuck's sake, man. Here, gie's it. Every time.

LOUD POP

It's easy, what you on about?! Why is that easy when you do it?!

Pasta!

Bloody hell!

Get the hot pan. Yes, I know, thanks! Bossy boots!

HE HUFFS

You all right? I got rejected again.

Does that mean they're not letting you have the room?

It's a credit issue - once again.

Er, Jamie? Yeah? My house is your house

for as long as you need it. You know that, right?

Yeah, but I feel bad. It means I get to keep you for longer.

Oh, shut up, man!

Ah, lad, are you messing?

New kid! Get on the pass with Freeman now, yeah?

Hurry up, lad! Move out the... Yes, Chef!

Now, I know it's your first day, but I've got to redo all this shit again now, cos you fucked it up, yeah?

Sorry, Chef, I just...

Anything else I can get ya during service, lad?

Do you want me to rub your back? Hey, hey, hey!

Want me to rub your feet? Want me to wipe your arse for you, do the whole fucking job, lad, yeah?

Carrot puree at the bottom, ox cheek

and then some scouse on top. You got that?

Right, where's my beef, where's my tray?

"Where's the beef"? He's fucked it up, lad. 25 minutes out.

Come on!

No, no, no. What you doing?

Carrot puree in the bot...

All right, all right, listen.

OK, erm, have you got your knives with you?

Yeah, yeah, they're... Yeah? They're in my bag.

OK, they're in the back. Can you go and get them?

Erm, yeah, yeah, of course, sure.

Won't be a sec. We'll get you out the back doing some stuff. Course.

Come on, Bolton, give me a push. Lad, he is fucking useless.

I don't care! Give me a push, come on.

Jake, hot pan there, lad. Jake, come and take this.

Bet you 20 quid he's not here next week.

RINGING TONE

HE EXHALES Not good, babe. Not good, babe.

I don't know why I thought I could do this.

What I'm doing here is nothing like what I was doing over there.

They're expecting me to know all this stuff,

like making hollandaise from scratch.

I've never made hollandaise from scratch!

Yeah, but if I say that, then they're going to know

I haven't got the training, aren't they?

Yeah, yeah.

HE INTAKES A BREATH

Yeah, it's fine.

Yeah, yeah, just, just do what you need to do.

Maybe I'm...maybe I'm overreacting.

One minute, hold it there. Oh... Sorry.

Promise. Love you. Bye.

How you getting on, all right? Surviving?

HE HUFFS

I just feel like I'm getting in everyone's way, to be honest.

Don't! Don't do that.

It's just one of those nights. Everybody's stressed.

It's just crazy being here, man.

I never thought I'd work in a place like this and I'd...

I just don't want to mess it up, you know?

Don't do that. You're not going to mess it up.

Listen, they're all brilliant at what they do. Excellent.

But don't be intimidated. They're idiots.

All of them,

except Carly and Emily, but the rest of them - idiots!

Yeah, I know, but you guys did all work with Andy Jones

and that is kind of big.

Yeah, aye, yeah. Erm, maybe don't bring that up in there?

It's still just a wee bit sensitive, so... Oh. Yeah? Yeah. Yeah.

Listen I'm going to go. Just, it's your first night.

Nobody's expecting you to be perfect so just...try and enjoy it, OK?

Yeah, yeah.

Thanks.

I got my knives, Chef.

Yeah, two seconds, two seconds.

We'll get you out back doing some stuff.

Chef? Freeman. Yes? Can I have a push, please?

Yeah, yeah, give me a minute, give me a minute.

OK, Johnny, come here.

I need you to copy EXACTLY what's going on here.

Carrot puree, meat and then the scouse.

EXACTLY like this.

Yeah? Nice and easy.

And then I need you to take the broccoli off there, put it in there.

It's for the same table, all right? Keep your knives down there.

Yes, Chef.

INDISTINCT BACKGROUND CHATTER

Service! BELL DINGS

No, no, Johnny.

This, in here. OK? Thank you.

Oh, fuck off. Do you think I'm a fucking idiot, lad?

Think I wasn't going to see that?

Lad, nothing - and I mean nothing -

leaves this kitchen unless it's uniform.

They haven't paid good money for you to fuck the food up, yeah?

Freeman, where's Carly, lad? What's going on?

Will you stop asking me that and just get on with your sh...

Er, keep the change. Yeah.

MUM?!

Mum?

Mum?

Mum?!

Oh, my God.

What you shouting for?

APPLAUSE ON TV

TV SOUND IS TURNED OFF

I was watching that.

What's the matter?

Are you all right?

How's your leg?

It's fine.

Is there any pain? Carly, relax!

Whatever it was, it's passed. Right, just stand up for me.

No! Mum.

I just need you to stand up.

MUM MUTTERS WEARILY

Oh, give us a hand, then. Yeah, OK.

All right? Thank you.

MUM GRUNTS WITH EFFORT

See?

MUM GASPS WITH EFFORT

Yes, I'm not a pensioner.

What happened, Mum? What do you mean?

You pressed your emergency alarm, Mum.

No, I didn't! Yes, you did.

No, no. I got an alert at work!

Oh! So I did.

I was making sure I knew how it worked, like you told me to.

So I, um, must have pressed the red button by mistake. Right.

What are you looking at me like that for?

You know it's, it's not as if I pressed it on purpose!

OK, Mum, I've got a really important night at work.

Oh, Carly, it's always an important night.

Maybe you're not cut out to run a business.

I'll see ya later.

Look, we're out of milk. Can you go and get some?

Yes! Two minutes.

Beef, beef, beef?

One minute, Freeman, lad.

How long on the mackerel, Camille? One minute.

It's on your right, there, Chef.

Service!

# Someone took the words to my song

# Someone took the words to my song

# The next time I write a song... #

Well done, mate. This beef is banging.

# There ain't gonna be no words, let the music go on... #

Service, service, service!

Hi, mate, good? Yeah, mate.

Fucking hell, man, that's banging. Yeah? Yeah, man, for real.

Cheers, man. Not bad!

Right, that looks good to go. Right, sweet, man. Thanks. No worries.

Johnny's fucking smashing it, everyone.

# Take the words away from my song... #

BELL JANGLES

# The only words I ever knew... #

Right, can we take this duck and then come back for the beef?

# Written just for me... #

Right, that's Liam's table all sorted.

Remember, they go out at the same time. Yes, Chef!

Em! Mm? Keep an eye on this mad house for me for two minutes.

I'm just going to give Carly a call, all right?

Oh, Freeman, pop the chocolate sauce back in the bath. Thank you.

Bolton! Hello. The jus need doing on those two, yeah?

Make sure they go out together, remember.

Er, new kid, do me a favour.

Get the sauce out that bath, put it in the jugs,

finish that table off, yeah? Yes, Chef. Thank you.

Er, Robyn? Yeah?

Table 11 are asking about the wine.

They've been waiting about ten minutes.

Er, yeah, sorry, um, I'll be there in two seconds.

I just need to take this out. Yeah, OK.

OK, all good? Yep.

Thank you.

All good? Yep.

She's not picking up.

Right, what's the chocolate sauce doing here?

You didn't just...

Thanks very much. Let me know...

Really sorry, gentlemen... Ah, Freeman!

There's been a slight mix-up in the kitchen.

Robyn, can you, erm, get these replaced with beef jus immediately?

OK. Thank you. I'm really sorry, guys.

Apologise, we'll get that sorted...

Freeman, the fellas just have some questions for you.

Just come and have a sit-down for a minute, will ya?

We're, we're pretty manic in...

Yeah, just come and have a quick sit-down. OK, two minutes.

They're asking a few things about the menu. Is that all right?

Two minutes. Ask away, fellas.

Where's Carly?

Freeman's our sous-chef.

We brought him over from Jones & Sons, as well.

All right, mate, we were just saying, this um,

this "Northern food", it's, it's quite cute,

and it's niche and all the rest of it, but it doesn't exactly inspire.

So, um, it'd be great if you could just, um,

sell it to me.

OK, er, Carly who I've worked with previously, um,

a restaurant called Jones & Sons,

she had this idea of taking, um, classic Northern cuisine

and sort of moving it into a kind of London five-star environment.

OK, look, I get all that.

What are people googling?

I don't know. What are people googling?

IN INDIAN ACCENT: Curries.

IN OWN ACCENT: You know? Italian food, Japanese food, right?

What people are NOT doing is going,

"Oh, we'll have a, we'll have a fucking Northern tonight".

You know what I mean?! Ben, but, this, this is quality food

and that's what people want around here.

Liam, I get that, right?

But there's other things we can be doing, all right?

What was your name again? Freeman.

Freeman? Yeah.

That's an interesting name.

So, Freeman, what we need, my friend...

Gimmicks.

Camille, give me a push, please.

I've got more tickets than a fucking bus conductor 'ere.

Bolton, I need two jus, please.

Is there anything I can do to help, Chef?

Yeah, just give me one second, lad.

Right, you can, eh...

Ah, shit! What are you doing here?

Nothing's ready.

Oh, man, that sauce is fucked. Er, Holly, hot pan there, please, mate.

Bolton, can you finish this off for me, please?

Ah, mate, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, come on.

Ah, lad, I'm up to my eyeballs here, what's going on?

You're not the only one struggling.

This is impossible, I need help. Please.

Lad, do us a favour, er... Bolton. Get two cod in the oven.

Bolton. Nah, swerve that. Bolt.

Just keep hold of them - when they're done, put them on a j-cloth

and then pass them over to Camille after. Bolt?!

What?! What do yous want? "What, what?" I need my duck.

What, what duck, lad?! I sent you, I sent you 40 minutes ago, my duck.

Lad, we've already sent that.

Bolt, I can't... I need a translator.

I really don't understand you.

Do me a favour. Here, I'll tell you what, I've got food here.

Yous know what the order is, you fucking take them, yeah?

Man, that's not the duck! What is going on here?

Hey, hey, hey! Stop talking to me, get out!

Table two said they've been waiting 45 minutes for their main!

Do you know what, Dean? I don't really care, mate.

I'm up to me fucking eyeballs here.

Charming! Charming as ever, Bolton.

Look at all this. It's all piled up.

OK come on, come on, come on!

Get to table two right now. Robyn, move! Just take it.

Come on. Unbelievable!

That can fuck off as well.

Tell me something -

what is the point in Point North?

SLOWLY: Northern-inspired cuisine.

It's pretty simple, really, guys.

Now, if you don't mind, gentlemen, I need to get back in the kitchen.

No, no, sit down. We've got a few more questions, bro.

Camille? Mm?

OK, thanks.

What do you want me to do now, Chef?

Um, lad, will you go in that fridge there,

make us up a fish sauce, yeah, please? Yes, Chef. Thank you.

Camille! Mm? Your pan.

Someone sort it out!

Yeah, OK. Quickly.

Don't worry, I've got it!

No, no, no! Johnny! HE SCREAMS

Oh, my God! Move out the fucking way! Just step back!

You a fucking idiot, lad? Everyone fucking move out the way.

It'll die out itself. Come on, come on, please, please.

What's the Northern inspiration behind the kale salad, then?

LAUGHTER

My mum and dad were always telling me to eat my veg.

Jake, move out the way, lad.

Holly, backs, backs. Hot pan. Put it in there.

What the fuck is going on in here? Yeah, the new kid

nearly burnt the fucking kitchen down,

but don't worry, I've sorted it.

Bolton, I leave you in here for five minutes in control,

the fucking kitchen nearly burns down.

I mean, it wasn't five minutes but, yeah, sound.

OK, lad. Yeah, sweet. No, it wasn't five minutes,

because I was sorting out your fucking mess.

You were sorting out MY mess?

Chocolate sauce on the most important table of the evening.

Lad, I asked the new kid to put the jus on the plate.

That's my fault? I asked YOU to put the jus on the plate, Bolton.

OK, yeah, while I'm drowning in all your fucking tickets.

I don't give a fuck, Bolton! You're sat outside,

having a fucking meal with all them. Having a knees-up.

That's what you think was going on out there?

That I was having a fucking jolly?

What else does it fucking look like, lad?

You have no fucking idea what I have to put up with out there.

Have a fucking day off, will ya, yeah?

"Oh, look at me, I'm Freeman, I'm angry again!" Do you know what?

It's like working with a fucking bunch of schoolkids.

You just fucking treat this place

like it's a fucking laugh and a joke.

This is a fucking serious place of work.

And fucking chocolate sauce, on the most important table.

For fuck's sake! CLATTERING, ALL YELL

For God's sake, calm down!

No! I'm not going to calm down! I've had enough!

It's like being back at fucking school!

You need to take a breath, love. Please.

Fuck this, man!

It's a joke! Ca va pas, non?

Oh, my God. WHAT was that about? Let's crack on.

Let's finish this shift and we can all fucking go home. You all right?

There was absolutely no need for that. That was fucking stupid.

I know. He could've hurt someone.

Are you all right, darling? It didn't hit you, did it?

No, no, it's fine. Are you all right? Yeah.

Stupid sod.

That's bloody ruined now.

Oh, shit.

One minute.

MUSIC PLAYS, HUBBUB

They didn't think we were worth the investment.

And they said we'd be lucky to still be open in six months.

All right, well, um...

That still gives us some time.

Does it? Cos the marketing ideas, social media...

Oh, God, Liam, no! Branding the... Even the franchising, Carly.

No, Liam. They're good ideas.

No, no. No, Liam, they're not. They're not good ideas.

And I'm absolutely not doing it.

We don't have that kind of restaurant,

it's not going to work for us.

I need you to keep the faith.

I need you to remember what we're doing here, what we've started.

And I need you to start acting like a business owner.

Because I can't put any more of my own money

into this and I know you'll... KNOCK AT DOOR

All right?

Sit down.

How's your mum?

Er, yeah, yeah, she's fine. Thanks.

So, do you want to explain what the hell happened out there tonight?

HE SIGHS

So, basically, your new guy put chocolate sauce

instead of the jus on the beef. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up!

The new guy was on the pass?

I popped out for, like, 30 seconds, to call you.

I left Bolton on the pass... I told you to put Camille on the pass.

Yeah, when I came back in from talking to you, Camille wasn't there.

So, you go and find her.

Bolton was covering me on the pass pretty much all night.

I've popped out for 30 seconds to call you.

At the busiest point of the service.

Carly, I was under it, I called you to see how long you'd be.

I went back inside, the plates were going out, I grabbed the plates...

You need to check. ..before they got to the table. You know that, Liam.

I got there and I pulled... No, no, no, no, no.

You need to be checking every plate. Chocolate sauce on beef?

Liam, hold on a second.

I got to the plates before and you made me sit down and...

No-one asked you to do anything.

...take the fucking business meeting for you and Carly.

No-one asked you to do that. No...

No-one asked you to do a business meeting.

I had to put up with racist abuse!

They're good guys, they're good guys! All right, all right!

Racist towards me, Carly. Freeman!

You're supposed to cover the kitchen and not only that...

I'm hearing that you've thrown a bottle across the floor

at Camille... Yeah. ..and the new guy.

And I...I apologised for that. Apologies aren't good enough.

But I did not throw it AT anybody.

We have spoken about this.

Your temper in the kitchen is not acceptable.

It is not how I run my kitchen.

What happened last time you lost your temper in the kitchen, Freeman?

What were the consequences of that? What?!

HE SCOFFS

All right, Carly, what do you mean by that? You know what I mean.

Andy's heart attack.

That wasn't helped by your outburst at Jones & Sons, was it?

So, you're going to put that on me, huh? It is on you!

Fuck you, Carly.

What you doing?

And fuck you, Liam.

You threw me under the bus there, and you know that.

Find yourself a new sous-chef.

Freeman...

SHE SIGHS

DOOR CLOSES

MUSIC PLAYS, HUBBUB

BOLTON MURMURS TO HIMSELF

What do you want?

I'm just waiting for Carly.

By the way, right, I don't care how short-staffed we are,

you fuck up like that again, next service you're gone lad, yeah?

Kelsey! I've got one here, mate, do you want a Lift?

Yeah, is that all right with you? Yeah, sound. No worries.

Right, fuck this, we're getting a car.

You lot. Dancing. XL. With me.

Who's in? Yeah.

Yes, Kit...

Right, lovebirds, come on, now or never. Are we dancing? Come on.

No, I really don't feel like it. Robyn! Come on...!

I've got a self-tape tomorrow, and I just want to look nice and rested.

You're always going to look nice and rested, beautiful...

Back me up on this. ..radiant.

Robyn, if you come dancing tonight I will let you

come in late for your shift tomorrow. Ahhh...

How is that for showbiz? Ah-ha.

Qui a fait ca?

Bonjour la class.

Je m'appelle Dean.

C'est bien, c'est bien, c'est bien.

J'habite a Londres.

J'aime jouer au foot.

She says bonjour. J'adore ma mere.

She says...

No. Zut alors!

Oi, mop-heads! Come on.

Yeah, I'll be there in a bit, I'm just on a late.

OK, Holly, thank you. Jake? Nah, I'm going to...

Billy Boy got me a drink, I'm going to finish that and that's...

I've got stuff to do, sorry. You're breaking my heart.

Hey, but, bro, you owe me money. Enough. Fuck you.

Habibi, I'm delighted you're coming,

but you are not coming in hungover tomorrow.

I'm never hungover. Habibi, I've been here all day.

Have I ever been hungover? Right, two minutes, guys! I'm going to pee.

Oh, yeah, sorry.

Um, Chef, um...

I just really wanted to apologise for this shift and, um...

How's your arm?

Yeah, yeah, it's fine.

Stupid, stupid mistake, um...

Again, I just really wanted to apologise.

I know...I know I messed up.

I think it's pretty obvious

that you don't have the experience of a chef de partie.

I know I don't have the skills but I promise you,

I'm willing to learn and it's just...

I just really need this job.

I'm going to level with you.

I am kind of in the shit right now and I need a commie chef.

So, if you come back tomorrow, we'll see how we go.

Thank you, Chef. Thank you, Chef. I won't let...

Look, I've got to get on.

I'll see you tomorrow, yeah.

Thank you, Chef, I won't let you down.

DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES

HE EXHALES

All right?

Has Freeman gone? Yep.

What happened?

CARLY SIGHS

He's quit.

You're joking?

Oh, he's a bloody hothead, Carly.

He'll be back in the morning, won't he?

Here you are, here's my orders for tomorrow. Thanks.

Um, I'm going to... I'm going to go to Andy's and give him this.

Is he all right?

Not really, no.

But he will be.

You should call him, y'know?

Night, darling.

SHE SNIFFLES

SPLASHING AND CLATTERING Oh, shit.

Oh, my God.

No, it's all right, I'll do it.

Oh, my God.

Hey...

Hey, what's up?

I...

Hi. Hey.

What time is it?

I don't even know. It's late.

So, go on.

How did it go?

Um... Yeah.

You got it, didn't ya? Yeah.

See, I knew you would. What did I tell ya?

Yeah, you did, you did. Are they nice to ya?

Well...

That's a story for another day, so.

BABY CRIES Oh, he's been crying all day.

I got it, I got it. You go back to sleep.

I don't know what was wrong with him.

He misses his dad, that's why.

Hey, hey.

BABY CRIES

It's OK, it's OK, it's OK, it's OK, it's OK, it's OK...

Hey.

I'm proud of ya.

SNOOKER COMMENTARY ON TV

Hiya!

Just me, Andy!

I brought you a doggy bag again from work.

SHE SIGHS

It's better than the stuff you have been eating, Andy.

Bloody hell.

Hey, how are you feeling?

Yeah, I'm all right.

Oh, Kels popped round, then?

Yeah, she posted it.

Apparently, I'm in no condition to see me own son.

Andy, what you doing?

It's only a few bevvies. I know,

but you shouldn't be drinking with your medication, it might...

Look, I'm sat here on my own, bored shitless all day.

A few bevvies isn't going to hurt.

Freeman left today.

Just walked.

Can't say I blame him.

I think you should talk to Carly, you know.

What would I want to talk to her for?

Eh, she wants to talk to me, she knows where I am.

She's got my number.

I mean, don't forget yous all used to work for me.

I've seen yous playing happy families.

Maybe if it wasn't for her,

I'd still have me own fucking restaurant!

Um...

I'm going to go.

I'll, er...

I'll come and see you in a couple of days, Andy, all right?

DOOR CLOSES

# Sometimes I feel like a motherless child

# Sometimes

# Sometimes I feel like I'm a motherless child

# A long way from home... #

BEEPING

# I'm a long

# A long way from home

# Sometimes, I feel

# Like I'm almost done... # LAUGHTER AND CHATTER

# Sometimes I feel like I'm almost done... #

How are we?

What's happening?

# Sometimes, sometimes I feel... #

Lad, I'll teach you that one day, don't worry.

# Like I am almost done... # Backchat me, though, I'm...

No, I'm scoping you, your ma, your da, your brother...

# And I know

# My time's not long

# I know my time's not long

# Sometimes I feel like I'm heaven-bound

# Sometimes I feel like I'm heaven-bound

# Sometimes, sometimes I feel

# Like I am heaven-bound

# And I wear a golden crown

# Sometimes I feel like my soul is on fire

# Sometimes I feel like my soul is on fire

# Sometimes, sometimes I feel

# Sometimes, sometimes I feel

# Sometimes, sometimes I feel

# Like my soul is on fire

# And I'm about to die. #

I offer, for your journalistic