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1
00:00:02,235 --> 00:00:03,968
♪ ooh-ooh-ooh ♪
2
00:00:04,037 --> 00:00:06,505
♪ thank you
for bein' a friend ♪
3
00:00:06,572 --> 00:00:09,707
♪ travel down the road
and back again ♪
4
00:00:09,775 --> 00:00:12,377
♪ your heart is true ♪
5
00:00:12,445 --> 00:00:15,547
♪ you're a pal
and a confidante ♪
6
00:00:17,283 --> 00:00:20,685
♪ and if you threw
a party ♪
7
00:00:20,753 --> 00:00:24,689
♪ invited everyone
you knew ♪
8
00:00:24,757 --> 00:00:26,458
♪ you would see ♪
9
00:00:26,526 --> 00:00:29,127
♪ the biggest gift
would be from me ♪
10
00:00:29,195 --> 00:00:31,196
♪ and the card attached
would say ♪
11
00:00:31,264 --> 00:00:33,898
♪ thank you
for bein' a friend ♪
12
00:00:33,966 --> 00:00:35,200
♪ thank you
for bein' a friend ♪
13
00:00:35,268 --> 00:00:36,868
♪ thank you
for bein' a friend ♪
14
00:00:36,936 --> 00:00:41,306
♪ thank you
for bein' a friend ♪♪
15
00:00:45,311 --> 00:00:48,246
Captioning made possible by
witt/thomas/harris productions,
cbs television network
16
00:00:48,314 --> 00:00:51,149
And 1992 nci caption club/
grantsmanship
17
00:01:03,963 --> 00:01:05,464
I--I understand,
miles.
18
00:01:05,531 --> 00:01:07,966
Do the best
you can, huh?
19
00:01:08,033 --> 00:01:09,033
Bye.
20
00:01:10,603 --> 00:01:12,804
Miles didn't cancel
your date again,
did he?
21
00:01:12,871 --> 00:01:15,940
He might stop by.
He had another meeting.
22
00:01:16,008 --> 00:01:17,942
I understand
things come up,
23
00:01:18,010 --> 00:01:20,945
But tonight was going
to be so romantic.
24
00:01:21,013 --> 00:01:22,380
I got candles.
25
00:01:22,448 --> 00:01:25,250
I shaved my legs
above the knee.
26
00:01:27,786 --> 00:01:30,489
I even bought
a new teddy.
27
00:01:30,556 --> 00:01:31,789
Victoria's secret?
28
00:01:31,857 --> 00:01:33,325
Toys r us.
29
00:01:37,330 --> 00:01:38,763
Rose, I'm so sorry.
30
00:01:38,831 --> 00:01:42,267
I know how much
you were looking
forward to tonight.
31
00:01:42,335 --> 00:01:44,269
Well, it's not
just tonight.
32
00:01:44,337 --> 00:01:46,738
We've owned
this hotel for weeks,
33
00:01:46,805 --> 00:01:48,840
And miles still
hasn't seen it.
34
00:01:48,907 --> 00:01:50,742
Not to mention
the fact
35
00:01:50,809 --> 00:01:52,677
That he's been
very inattentive
36
00:01:52,745 --> 00:01:54,546
To some of
my other needs.
37
00:01:54,614 --> 00:01:56,047
What do you mean?
38
00:01:56,115 --> 00:01:59,083
Well, it's been
a long time since we...
39
00:02:00,153 --> 00:02:02,420
Since we...
Played cards.
40
00:02:03,822 --> 00:02:06,991
Really?
41
00:02:07,059 --> 00:02:09,961
How long has it been
since you played cards?
42
00:02:10,029 --> 00:02:11,463
Almost three months.
43
00:02:11,531 --> 00:02:14,999
If I don't get
my deck shuffled soon...
44
00:02:18,771 --> 00:02:20,205
Uh, o.K., blanche,
45
00:02:20,273 --> 00:02:23,675
These are
the guest registers
dating back to 1985.
46
00:02:23,742 --> 00:02:25,743
There may be more
in the attic.
47
00:02:25,811 --> 00:02:27,445
What?
Oh, my goodness.
48
00:02:27,513 --> 00:02:28,746
This name right here.
49
00:02:28,814 --> 00:02:29,914
Jimmy swaggart?
50
00:02:29,982 --> 00:02:31,049
Uh-uh.
51
00:02:33,986 --> 00:02:34,952
Beneath it.
52
00:02:35,020 --> 00:02:37,255
Jimmy swaggart?
53
00:02:37,323 --> 00:02:40,258
Right there.
Miles webber!
54
00:02:40,326 --> 00:02:41,393
Oh. So?
55
00:02:41,460 --> 00:02:42,860
There it is again.
56
00:02:42,928 --> 00:02:47,499
Oh, no!
Ohh! Miles webber's
all through this book.
57
00:02:47,567 --> 00:02:50,502
Miles webber
is one of our
best customers.
58
00:02:50,570 --> 00:02:52,003
Nice-looking
older guy.
59
00:02:52,071 --> 00:02:54,539
I haven't
seen him lately.
You know him?
60
00:02:54,607 --> 00:02:57,442
Know him?
He is rose's boyfriend.
61
00:02:57,510 --> 00:02:59,444
They're
practically engaged.
62
00:02:59,512 --> 00:03:02,447
Oh, this news is
going to destroy her.
63
00:03:02,515 --> 00:03:04,115
Poor, poor rose.
64
00:03:04,183 --> 00:03:06,951
Blanche, we should not
get involved in this.
65
00:03:07,019 --> 00:03:08,853
You're probably just
jumping to conclusions.
66
00:03:08,921 --> 00:03:11,856
There are
a lot of reasons
people check in here.
67
00:03:11,924 --> 00:03:14,792
Why would he come here
on a regular basis?
68
00:03:14,860 --> 00:03:16,094
He lives in miami.
69
00:03:16,161 --> 00:03:17,596
You live in miami.
70
00:03:17,663 --> 00:03:19,030
Why would you
come here?
71
00:03:24,437 --> 00:03:26,638
Oh, poor, poor rose.
72
00:03:28,507 --> 00:03:29,874
I still
don't understand
73
00:03:29,942 --> 00:03:32,176
Why we can't serve
my lasagna
every night.
74
00:03:32,245 --> 00:03:35,614
I told you, we have
to vary the menu,
75
00:03:35,681 --> 00:03:36,748
Give the people choices.
76
00:03:36,815 --> 00:03:38,149
They've got a choice.
77
00:03:38,217 --> 00:03:40,652
They can either
eat my lasagna
78
00:03:40,720 --> 00:03:42,454
Or kiss my butt.
79
00:03:42,521 --> 00:03:46,157
O.K., but does
your butt come
with soup and salad?
80
00:03:49,328 --> 00:03:51,396
What am I
going to do?
81
00:03:51,464 --> 00:03:52,597
What's wrong, blanche?
82
00:03:52,665 --> 00:03:55,300
Sophia, I have
a big problem.
83
00:03:55,368 --> 00:03:56,834
I wish
dorothy was here.
84
00:03:56,902 --> 00:03:58,236
I need her advice.
85
00:03:58,304 --> 00:03:59,704
What about me?
86
00:03:59,772 --> 00:04:01,205
No offense, sophia,
87
00:04:01,274 --> 00:04:03,207
But dorothy gives
the best advice.
88
00:04:03,276 --> 00:04:05,109
She always knows
what to say.
89
00:04:05,177 --> 00:04:06,811
I always know
what to say,
90
00:04:06,879 --> 00:04:09,080
You aging drag queen.
91
00:04:11,651 --> 00:04:13,217
Now what's the problem?
92
00:04:13,286 --> 00:04:14,686
Well, all right.
93
00:04:14,754 --> 00:04:17,221
This is
a really big one.
94
00:04:17,290 --> 00:04:20,858
Sophia, I'm afraid
maybe miles is
cheating on rose.
95
00:04:20,926 --> 00:04:23,361
I don't know
what to do.
96
00:04:23,429 --> 00:04:24,729
Should
I tell her?
97
00:04:24,797 --> 00:04:27,732
Oh, this screams
for a sophia story.
98
00:04:27,800 --> 00:04:30,902
But don't worry.
I won't make you beg.
99
00:04:30,969 --> 00:04:33,538
Picture it--
brooklyn, 1957.
100
00:04:33,606 --> 00:04:34,806
Sophia,
not another story.
101
00:04:34,873 --> 00:04:37,809
Can't you just get
to the point?
102
00:04:37,876 --> 00:04:40,845
Would you tell aesop
to just get to the point?
103
00:04:40,913 --> 00:04:42,814
Or the brothers grimm?
104
00:04:42,881 --> 00:04:44,349
Would you tell, uh...
105
00:04:44,417 --> 00:04:45,583
Who else tells stories?
106
00:04:45,651 --> 00:04:46,851
Mark twain.
107
00:04:46,919 --> 00:04:48,886
Too folksy.
108
00:04:48,954 --> 00:04:49,887
O. Henry.
109
00:04:49,955 --> 00:04:51,356
Too ironic.
110
00:04:51,424 --> 00:04:52,557
Ray bradbury.
111
00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:55,293
Science fiction? Feh.
112
00:04:55,361 --> 00:04:56,594
Get to the point!
113
00:04:56,662 --> 00:04:58,095
Fine. Here it is.
114
00:04:58,163 --> 00:05:00,064
And that's
why I stopped
115
00:05:00,132 --> 00:05:02,334
Making polio vaccine
from scratch.
116
00:05:07,072 --> 00:05:08,640
I don't understand.
117
00:05:08,708 --> 00:05:11,476
Not my problem,
miss get-to-the-point.
118
00:05:13,946 --> 00:05:16,881
Well, maybe I can be
of some assistance.
119
00:05:16,949 --> 00:05:19,684
I have a little expertise
in the field.
120
00:05:19,752 --> 00:05:22,387
You see, somebody
cheated on me once,
121
00:05:22,455 --> 00:05:24,856
Somebody I loved
and trusted...My wife.
122
00:05:24,923 --> 00:05:26,224
Well, my ex-wife.
123
00:05:26,291 --> 00:05:28,393
Actually,
I'd love to say
124
00:05:28,461 --> 00:05:30,895
My late ex-wife,
but she's still--
125
00:05:30,963 --> 00:05:33,732
Get to the point--
any point.
126
00:05:33,799 --> 00:05:36,300
Oh, o.K.
The point is
127
00:05:36,369 --> 00:05:38,837
That I think
you should tell rose.
128
00:05:38,904 --> 00:05:42,273
I wouldn't want her
to find out
like I did.
129
00:05:42,341 --> 00:05:43,842
H-how did you
find out?
130
00:05:43,909 --> 00:05:45,377
Graffiti.
131
00:05:50,949 --> 00:05:51,849
Excuse me.
132
00:05:51,917 --> 00:05:55,152
Have you found
a pair of sunglasses?
133
00:05:55,219 --> 00:05:56,821
Are these them?
134
00:05:56,888 --> 00:05:57,788
Yes!
135
00:05:57,856 --> 00:05:59,423
Lobby tax.
136
00:06:00,525 --> 00:06:01,625
Of course.
137
00:06:01,693 --> 00:06:03,427
Here's $5.00.
138
00:06:03,495 --> 00:06:04,695
Thank you.
139
00:06:06,498 --> 00:06:08,833
This isn't
what you think.
140
00:06:08,900 --> 00:06:11,001
How can you
look me in the eyes?
141
00:06:11,069 --> 00:06:13,136
I did nothing wrong.
I was just--
142
00:06:13,204 --> 00:06:15,639
I mean,
you're just a kid.
143
00:06:15,707 --> 00:06:18,709
How come you're
as tall as I am?
144
00:06:20,479 --> 00:06:22,045
What's going on here?
145
00:06:22,113 --> 00:06:26,049
So I was using
the lost-and-found
to make money.
146
00:06:26,117 --> 00:06:28,185
I was being
enterprising.
147
00:06:28,252 --> 00:06:29,753
What's the big deal?
148
00:06:29,821 --> 00:06:32,556
You were doing
something called extortion.
149
00:06:32,624 --> 00:06:34,458
You're not
going to tell
roland, are you?
150
00:06:34,526 --> 00:06:37,127
Of course. I have
to set an example
151
00:06:37,195 --> 00:06:38,829
So you know
right from wrong.
152
00:06:38,897 --> 00:06:40,330
But then again,
153
00:06:40,398 --> 00:06:42,332
$5.00 could
make me forget
154
00:06:42,400 --> 00:06:43,934
This whole
sordid incident.
155
00:06:45,236 --> 00:06:46,470
What?
156
00:06:46,538 --> 00:06:47,972
To be honest,
157
00:06:48,039 --> 00:06:49,473
I'll probably
forget anyway,
158
00:06:49,541 --> 00:06:52,943
But 5 bucks
will seal the deal.
159
00:06:53,011 --> 00:06:54,444
But that's blackmail.
160
00:06:54,513 --> 00:06:56,279
It's just as bad
as extortion.
161
00:06:56,347 --> 00:06:57,781
Such a little boy
162
00:06:57,849 --> 00:07:00,283
To be using
such big words...
163
00:07:00,351 --> 00:07:02,019
Cough it up!
164
00:07:06,725 --> 00:07:08,726
Penny for your thoughts,
sophia.
165
00:07:08,793 --> 00:07:09,727
You're stupid,
166
00:07:09,794 --> 00:07:11,795
And that's
on the house.
167
00:07:15,233 --> 00:07:17,167
Rose...
168
00:07:17,235 --> 00:07:18,636
We have to talk.
169
00:07:18,703 --> 00:07:21,672
Oh, no.
This is bad news,
isn't it?
170
00:07:21,740 --> 00:07:24,675
Conversations
that start with
"we have to talk"
171
00:07:24,743 --> 00:07:26,243
Always end
with bad news.
172
00:07:26,310 --> 00:07:27,745
Rose, let's sit down.
173
00:07:27,812 --> 00:07:29,246
Oh, my god.
174
00:07:29,313 --> 00:07:32,215
"we have to talk"
and "let's sit down"?
175
00:07:32,283 --> 00:07:33,450
Somebody died.
176
00:07:33,518 --> 00:07:35,586
It's about miles.
177
00:07:35,654 --> 00:07:37,555
Miles is dead?
178
00:07:37,622 --> 00:07:39,056
No, miles is alive...
179
00:07:39,123 --> 00:07:40,524
Very much alive.
180
00:07:40,592 --> 00:07:42,059
In fact, rose,
181
00:07:42,126 --> 00:07:46,730
I have proof
that miles has been
unfaithful to you.
182
00:07:46,798 --> 00:07:48,298
What?
183
00:07:48,366 --> 00:07:50,768
Today, going through
the guest ledgers,
184
00:07:50,835 --> 00:07:52,803
I found his name...
Several times.
185
00:07:52,871 --> 00:07:54,805
Before we bought
this hotel,
186
00:07:54,873 --> 00:07:57,641
Miles was a regular
on Wednesday nights.
187
00:07:57,709 --> 00:07:59,043
Roland has seen him here.
188
00:07:59,110 --> 00:08:03,013
Wednesday
is the night
he plays poker.
189
00:08:03,081 --> 00:08:05,683
Well, there must be
some explanation.
190
00:08:05,750 --> 00:08:08,452
Hasn't he been
canceling a lot
of dates lately?
191
00:08:08,519 --> 00:08:11,956
That's because
he's had a lot
of meetings lately.
192
00:08:12,023 --> 00:08:14,858
Meetings...At night.
193
00:08:14,926 --> 00:08:16,326
Mm-hmm.
This also explains
194
00:08:16,394 --> 00:08:19,362
Why he hasn't been
by the hotel yet.
195
00:08:19,430 --> 00:08:20,831
Trust me on this.
196
00:08:20,899 --> 00:08:24,367
I know when
a man cheats.
I can sense it.
197
00:08:24,435 --> 00:08:28,338
When I get this
tense, tight feeling
in my loins,
198
00:08:28,406 --> 00:08:32,542
It speaks to me.
It says adultery!
199
00:08:32,611 --> 00:08:36,179
Boy, and I thought
señor wences
was talented.
200
00:08:39,117 --> 00:08:41,785
Honey, I'm so sorry
about this.
201
00:08:41,853 --> 00:08:43,787
This doesn't
make any sense.
202
00:08:43,855 --> 00:08:46,189
Miles loves me.
I know he does.
203
00:08:46,257 --> 00:08:47,424
He's...He's...
204
00:08:47,492 --> 00:08:48,391
He's here!
205
00:08:48,459 --> 00:08:49,994
Oh, my god.
Rose, he's here.
206
00:08:50,061 --> 00:08:53,196
I want to act as if
nothing has happened.
207
00:08:53,264 --> 00:08:55,165
Give miles a chance
to explain.
208
00:08:55,233 --> 00:08:57,668
Will you look
at this place?
209
00:08:57,736 --> 00:08:59,670
Blanche, rose--
it is beautiful!
210
00:08:59,738 --> 00:09:01,171
I'm sorry I'm late.
211
00:09:01,239 --> 00:09:02,940
At least I got here.
212
00:09:03,008 --> 00:09:04,742
What took you so long,
sweetheart?
213
00:09:04,809 --> 00:09:06,977
Well, I stopped off
for a sandwich.
214
00:09:07,045 --> 00:09:10,781
Oh, sure. A sandwich.
That's a good one.
215
00:09:10,849 --> 00:09:13,017
Blanche, please,
we agreed.
216
00:09:13,084 --> 00:09:15,352
What kind of a sandwich,
sweetheart?
217
00:09:15,419 --> 00:09:16,386
Tuna fish.
218
00:09:16,454 --> 00:09:17,621
Liar!
219
00:09:22,527 --> 00:09:24,461
All right.
It was a cheeseburger.
220
00:09:24,529 --> 00:09:27,364
I didn't want to hear
that cholesterol
speech again.
221
00:09:27,431 --> 00:09:29,499
Was the sex better
with her?
222
00:09:29,567 --> 00:09:30,901
And don't lie again.
223
00:09:30,969 --> 00:09:33,070
Sex?
What are you
talking about?
224
00:09:33,138 --> 00:09:35,238
You've been cheating.
I told her.
225
00:09:35,306 --> 00:09:36,774
You did what?
226
00:09:36,841 --> 00:09:40,510
You've been coming here
for a long time
with other women.
227
00:09:40,578 --> 00:09:43,413
I saw your name
in the guest register.
228
00:09:43,481 --> 00:09:44,447
That's impossible!
229
00:09:44,515 --> 00:09:46,383
I've never
been here before.
230
00:09:46,450 --> 00:09:47,851
What's going on here?
231
00:09:47,919 --> 00:09:49,019
Stop it!
232
00:09:49,087 --> 00:09:50,688
I deserve
better than this.
233
00:09:50,755 --> 00:09:52,723
Rose, calm down now.
234
00:09:52,791 --> 00:09:54,224
You never loved me.
235
00:09:54,292 --> 00:09:56,794
Just admit it!
You never loved me.
236
00:09:56,861 --> 00:09:57,995
Rose, that's not true.
237
00:09:58,063 --> 00:09:59,262
Rose, rose!
238
00:10:00,264 --> 00:10:01,699
Ha ha ha!
239
00:10:01,766 --> 00:10:04,034
Let's have a nice
round of applause
240
00:10:04,102 --> 00:10:06,036
For our
golden palace players
241
00:10:06,104 --> 00:10:08,038
In their living
theater production
242
00:10:08,106 --> 00:10:10,040
Of come back,little sheba.
243
00:10:10,108 --> 00:10:12,242
Thank you.
Thank you.
244
00:10:12,310 --> 00:10:15,278
Please, join us tomorrow
when we will do
245
00:10:15,346 --> 00:10:18,415
Our critically acclaimed
version of li'l abner.
246
00:10:18,482 --> 00:10:19,983
Good night.
Good night.
247
00:10:20,051 --> 00:10:21,518
All right. Come on.
248
00:10:21,586 --> 00:10:24,487
I don't know why
you did that,
249
00:10:24,555 --> 00:10:26,990
But you have destroyed
our relationship.
250
00:10:27,058 --> 00:10:28,525
I hope you're satisfied.
251
00:10:28,593 --> 00:10:30,493
Oh, the nerve of him--
252
00:10:30,561 --> 00:10:34,497
Caught red-handed,
and he still lies
through his teeth.
253
00:10:34,565 --> 00:10:37,034
But you can't fool
blanche devereaux.
254
00:10:37,102 --> 00:10:40,971
I could see the pathetic
grasping desperation
255
00:10:41,039 --> 00:10:43,807
All over miles'
guilt-ridden face.
256
00:10:43,875 --> 00:10:46,176
Wait. Hold it.
That was miles?
257
00:10:46,244 --> 00:10:47,410
Oh, boy.
258
00:10:47,478 --> 00:10:50,914
There is a miles weber
who is a regular,
259
00:10:50,982 --> 00:10:52,149
But that wasn't him.
260
00:10:53,417 --> 00:10:54,852
Oops.
261
00:11:04,762 --> 00:11:06,195
Here, rose. Drink this.
262
00:11:06,263 --> 00:11:08,030
Maybe I overreacted.
263
00:11:08,098 --> 00:11:10,700
I should have let
miles explain.
264
00:11:10,768 --> 00:11:11,967
There is no excuse.
265
00:11:12,035 --> 00:11:15,137
That guy doesn't deserve
a beautiful woman like you.
266
00:11:15,205 --> 00:11:16,306
You should go out
267
00:11:16,373 --> 00:11:18,441
And find yourself
another boyfriend.
268
00:11:18,509 --> 00:11:20,142
It would serve him right
269
00:11:20,210 --> 00:11:24,113
If I went out
and had an affair
with another man,
270
00:11:24,181 --> 00:11:26,649
A real man.
That'd teach him.
271
00:11:26,717 --> 00:11:29,151
Boy, if I could
lay my hands
272
00:11:29,219 --> 00:11:30,753
On some virile,
masculine hunk,
273
00:11:30,821 --> 00:11:32,288
I'd do it.
274
00:11:39,730 --> 00:11:41,664
Ahem.
275
00:11:41,732 --> 00:11:43,700
I've worn
women's clothing.
276
00:11:46,203 --> 00:11:47,236
Really?
277
00:11:47,304 --> 00:11:49,305
I never felt so free.
278
00:11:50,941 --> 00:11:52,174
Maybe I'm kidding
myself.
279
00:11:52,242 --> 00:11:54,176
Miles would never
be threatened
280
00:11:54,244 --> 00:11:55,645
By just anybody.
281
00:11:55,713 --> 00:11:59,649
It would have
to be somebody dark
and mysterious,
282
00:11:59,717 --> 00:12:02,418
Someone dangerous
and forbidden.
283
00:12:02,486 --> 00:12:04,354
Hey, guys.
What's going on?
284
00:12:06,089 --> 00:12:08,458
Roland, what are you
doing tonight?
285
00:12:08,525 --> 00:12:09,726
I don't have plans.
286
00:12:09,793 --> 00:12:13,596
Because rose is
looking for a real man
to sleep with.
287
00:12:13,664 --> 00:12:15,698
Aside from painting
my toenails.
288
00:12:18,702 --> 00:12:19,869
Darn.
289
00:12:19,936 --> 00:12:22,204
I'll never find anybody
as good as miles.
290
00:12:22,272 --> 00:12:24,139
You're still
breaking up
with miles?
291
00:12:24,207 --> 00:12:26,642
After what he did?
Of course.
292
00:12:26,710 --> 00:12:31,113
Promise me when you
settle down with a woman
293
00:12:31,181 --> 00:12:32,482
Or whoever.
294
00:12:33,684 --> 00:12:35,418
That you'll be faithful.
295
00:12:35,486 --> 00:12:37,420
Didn't blanche
tell you what happened?
296
00:12:37,488 --> 00:12:38,421
About what?
297
00:12:38,489 --> 00:12:40,390
There is a miles weber
298
00:12:40,457 --> 00:12:42,658
Who's a regular
at this hotel,
299
00:12:42,726 --> 00:12:44,527
But he's a different
miles weber than yours.
300
00:12:44,595 --> 00:12:46,829
I told blanche that
two hours ago.
301
00:12:46,897 --> 00:12:48,130
What?
302
00:12:48,198 --> 00:12:50,933
Oh, uh, I'm sorry.
303
00:12:51,001 --> 00:12:51,934
It's o.K.
304
00:12:52,002 --> 00:12:54,437
Now if you'll both
excuse me,
305
00:12:54,505 --> 00:12:57,673
I have to go kick
some gravy-sucking,
306
00:12:57,741 --> 00:13:00,175
Gopher-eating,
cousin-humping
southern butt
307
00:13:00,243 --> 00:13:02,011
From here to chattanooga!
308
00:13:03,313 --> 00:13:04,213
Excuse me.
309
00:13:04,281 --> 00:13:07,016
I didn't order
a baked potato.
310
00:13:07,083 --> 00:13:09,619
I ordered rice.
311
00:13:09,686 --> 00:13:10,686
All right.
312
00:13:12,188 --> 00:13:13,756
We need rice!
313
00:13:23,199 --> 00:13:25,000
I have something
to tell you.
314
00:13:25,068 --> 00:13:26,001
I bet.
315
00:13:26,069 --> 00:13:28,137
What lies are you
going to tell me
316
00:13:28,204 --> 00:13:29,772
About miles this time?
317
00:13:29,840 --> 00:13:32,642
How many women
he cheated on me with?
318
00:13:32,709 --> 00:13:36,145
How many times he did it
while I was on vacation?
319
00:13:36,212 --> 00:13:38,648
How he liked to cut
pictures of jackie collins
320
00:13:38,715 --> 00:13:40,149
Out of old people
magazines
321
00:13:40,216 --> 00:13:42,652
And sleep with them
under his pillow?
322
00:13:42,719 --> 00:13:45,220
Well, tell me something
I don't know, blanche!
323
00:13:45,288 --> 00:13:47,222
You told her
about miles!
324
00:13:47,290 --> 00:13:49,892
You couldn't wait
for me to do it?
325
00:13:49,960 --> 00:13:51,661
How did I get involved?
326
00:13:51,728 --> 00:13:54,897
I distinctly remember
trying not to get
involved in this.
327
00:13:54,965 --> 00:13:58,400
Rose, I was only trying
to be a good friend.
328
00:13:58,469 --> 00:14:00,736
Why didn't you
tell me immediately
329
00:14:00,804 --> 00:14:02,438
This was all
a misunderstanding?
330
00:14:02,506 --> 00:14:05,675
I wanted to, but it
was hard for me.
331
00:14:05,742 --> 00:14:06,843
I was scared.
332
00:14:06,910 --> 00:14:10,680
I was afraid you might
get mad at me.
333
00:14:10,747 --> 00:14:12,949
I guess I shouldn't
be surprised.
334
00:14:13,016 --> 00:14:15,618
Like always,
you were too concerned
with blanche,
335
00:14:15,686 --> 00:14:17,620
About what
would happen to you.
336
00:14:17,688 --> 00:14:19,288
You cared more
about that
337
00:14:19,356 --> 00:14:20,823
That my relationship
with miles.
338
00:14:20,891 --> 00:14:21,891
Some friend.
339
00:14:21,959 --> 00:14:23,125
We shouldn't
do this--
340
00:14:23,193 --> 00:14:25,595
You stay out of this.
You've said enough!
341
00:14:25,662 --> 00:14:28,865
As far as I'm concerned,
our friendship is over!
342
00:14:28,932 --> 00:14:29,966
Yes!
343
00:14:31,034 --> 00:14:31,968
Bravo!
344
00:14:32,035 --> 00:14:34,203
Bravo!
345
00:14:42,646 --> 00:14:45,848
Hey, guys, rose
wanted some decaf.
346
00:14:45,916 --> 00:14:47,850
O.K. Oh, whoa!
347
00:14:47,918 --> 00:14:49,785
Come here,
little man.
348
00:14:49,853 --> 00:14:52,855
Sophia says
you've been using
the lost-and-found
349
00:14:52,923 --> 00:14:55,190
To extort money
from the guests.
350
00:14:55,258 --> 00:14:57,493
She got 5 bucks
to keep quiet.
351
00:14:57,561 --> 00:14:59,395
Don't interrupt. Chuy?
352
00:14:59,462 --> 00:15:03,933
Look, the point is that
we all care about you.
353
00:15:04,001 --> 00:15:06,301
We want you to know
what's right.
354
00:15:06,369 --> 00:15:07,904
We're trying
to be role models.
355
00:15:07,971 --> 00:15:09,739
She took my 5 bucks.
356
00:15:09,806 --> 00:15:12,274
Some are doing
a better job than others.
357
00:15:14,745 --> 00:15:16,812
I know what
you're trying to do.
358
00:15:16,880 --> 00:15:18,648
You're trying
to make easy money.
359
00:15:18,715 --> 00:15:20,416
Promise you won't
do it anymore.
360
00:15:20,483 --> 00:15:21,651
All right, I promise.
361
00:15:21,718 --> 00:15:22,752
O.K.
362
00:15:22,819 --> 00:15:26,288
There any chance of me
getting my 5 bucks back?
363
00:15:26,356 --> 00:15:28,991
There may be $5.00
waiting on your dresser.
364
00:15:29,059 --> 00:15:31,527
Really? Great!
365
00:15:31,595 --> 00:15:34,496
Why can't I feel guilt?
366
00:15:39,402 --> 00:15:42,337
It's just one of those
silly coincidences,
367
00:15:42,405 --> 00:15:43,338
That's all.
368
00:15:43,406 --> 00:15:44,907
Oh, thank you,
sweetheart.
369
00:15:52,950 --> 00:15:55,117
Oh, I feel so dumb,
miles.
370
00:15:55,185 --> 00:15:57,720
Oh, rose. It was just
an honest mistake.
371
00:15:57,788 --> 00:16:00,522
I must have been
out of my mind.
372
00:16:00,591 --> 00:16:04,794
I even planned a way
to get back at you.
373
00:16:04,861 --> 00:16:06,295
Oh, revenge, huh?
374
00:16:06,362 --> 00:16:07,463
You're so cute.
375
00:16:07,530 --> 00:16:09,431
What were you
going to do,
376
00:16:09,499 --> 00:16:12,434
Call me on the phone
and hang up,
377
00:16:12,502 --> 00:16:14,904
Ring the doorbell
and run away?
378
00:16:14,972 --> 00:16:16,772
I hired an ex-green beret
379
00:16:16,840 --> 00:16:18,708
To tamper
with your brakes.
380
00:16:25,248 --> 00:16:27,316
I decided
at the last second
381
00:16:27,383 --> 00:16:29,151
I couldn't
go through with it.
382
00:16:29,219 --> 00:16:30,820
You were still my fella.
383
00:16:30,887 --> 00:16:32,154
You will always be--
384
00:16:32,222 --> 00:16:35,557
At do you mean,
"at the last second"?
385
00:16:35,626 --> 00:16:36,826
I'm glad it's over.
386
00:16:36,893 --> 00:16:40,329
Now I have to figure
how I can work here
387
00:16:40,396 --> 00:16:42,798
Without ever
talking to blanche.
388
00:16:42,866 --> 00:16:45,968
Rose, I think
you're overreacting.
389
00:16:46,036 --> 00:16:48,337
And I'm also upset
with sophia.
390
00:16:48,404 --> 00:16:50,305
She was
a little too eager
391
00:16:50,373 --> 00:16:53,976
To give me
that green beret's
phone number.
392
00:16:54,044 --> 00:16:56,846
Look, I think you ought
to forgive blanche.
393
00:16:56,913 --> 00:16:58,848
Listen,
I was upset, too,
394
00:16:58,915 --> 00:17:02,652
But we're human. We all
make mistakes, rose.
395
00:17:02,719 --> 00:17:04,620
She tried to
make me think
396
00:17:04,688 --> 00:17:06,155
You were cheating on me.
397
00:17:06,222 --> 00:17:09,125
Although I'd have to
be a pretty big idiot
398
00:17:09,192 --> 00:17:10,626
To believe it.
399
00:17:10,694 --> 00:17:13,629
The very idea
of you cheating on me.
400
00:17:13,697 --> 00:17:16,598
It's really silly
when you think of it.
401
00:17:16,667 --> 00:17:18,768
Ha ha ha!
402
00:17:18,835 --> 00:17:20,269
Ha ha ha.
403
00:17:20,336 --> 00:17:22,171
Ohh. Eh...
404
00:17:22,238 --> 00:17:23,773
Heh heh heh?
405
00:17:25,776 --> 00:17:28,343
Rose...
406
00:17:28,411 --> 00:17:30,079
We have to talk.
407
00:17:30,147 --> 00:17:34,750
I sure hope you're
about to tell me
somebody died.
408
00:17:34,818 --> 00:17:37,352
About six months ago,
rose, I--
409
00:17:37,420 --> 00:17:39,354
I was eating
in a restaurant,
410
00:17:39,422 --> 00:17:40,856
And I met this waitress.
411
00:17:40,924 --> 00:17:42,357
Her name is fern,
412
00:17:42,425 --> 00:17:44,326
And we--
we got to talking,
413
00:17:44,394 --> 00:17:48,397
And, well, her husband
had just died.
414
00:17:48,464 --> 00:17:50,933
Oh, thank god.
Somebody died.
415
00:17:52,435 --> 00:17:56,005
No, sweetheart. That's
not where I'm going.
416
00:17:56,073 --> 00:17:57,439
Oh?
417
00:17:57,507 --> 00:18:00,375
We found we had
so much in common.
418
00:18:00,443 --> 00:18:03,779
We've developed a very
special relationship.
419
00:18:03,847 --> 00:18:05,881
We've become
very close, rose.
420
00:18:05,949 --> 00:18:07,049
I don't believe this.
421
00:18:07,117 --> 00:18:09,051
Sweetheart,
I--I didn't mean
422
00:18:09,119 --> 00:18:11,386
To fall in love
with two women,
423
00:18:11,454 --> 00:18:14,356
But I did, and
I'm very confused.
424
00:18:14,424 --> 00:18:16,225
I don't know what to do.
425
00:18:16,292 --> 00:18:20,096
At my age,
I can't afford to
make the wrong choice.
426
00:18:20,163 --> 00:18:25,434
Choice? This isn't
the pepsi challenge, miles.
427
00:18:26,803 --> 00:18:29,739
When I think of all
that we've shared--
428
00:18:29,806 --> 00:18:32,074
And for you
not to be sure.
429
00:18:32,142 --> 00:18:33,909
If we talk about it,
430
00:18:33,977 --> 00:18:36,278
Maybe we'll work
something out.
431
00:18:36,346 --> 00:18:38,247
If you don't know by now
432
00:18:38,314 --> 00:18:40,916
That I'm the only one
for you,
433
00:18:40,984 --> 00:18:42,752
There's nothing
to work out.
434
00:18:42,819 --> 00:18:43,919
Oh, no, rose--
435
00:18:43,987 --> 00:18:45,554
I want you to leave.
436
00:18:45,622 --> 00:18:47,189
Rose, don't...
437
00:18:57,500 --> 00:18:59,001
Miles?
438
00:19:00,703 --> 00:19:02,772
Why did you
decide to tell me?
439
00:19:02,839 --> 00:19:04,039
Even though blanche
440
00:19:04,107 --> 00:19:06,041
Didn't get
her facts straight,
441
00:19:06,109 --> 00:19:09,311
Somehow she
was right about me.
442
00:19:09,379 --> 00:19:11,881
Her loins can talk,
you know.
443
00:19:18,955 --> 00:19:21,390
That'sice, rose.
444
00:19:21,457 --> 00:19:23,358
But I realized
that blanche
445
00:19:23,426 --> 00:19:26,896
Is a better friend
to you than I am,
446
00:19:26,963 --> 00:19:29,999
And I couldn't
let you throw
that friendship away.
447
00:19:30,066 --> 00:19:31,633
Thank you.
448
00:19:32,769 --> 00:19:34,636
You think maybe...
449
00:19:36,973 --> 00:19:38,941
Maybe someday, uh...
450
00:20:03,766 --> 00:20:05,868
Oh, oh, rose, honey.
451
00:20:05,936 --> 00:20:08,337
Roland told me
about miles.
452
00:20:08,404 --> 00:20:09,538
I am so sorry.
453
00:20:09,605 --> 00:20:13,375
I'm so sorry for all
the things I said to you.
454
00:20:13,443 --> 00:20:15,510
It turns out
you were right.
455
00:20:15,578 --> 00:20:17,146
Wish I hadn't been.
456
00:20:17,214 --> 00:20:19,882
He's gone, blanche.
Miles is gone.
457
00:20:19,950 --> 00:20:23,185
Oh, god. What am I
supposed to do now?
458
00:20:23,253 --> 00:20:26,188
You could try doing
what I always do
459
00:20:26,256 --> 00:20:27,857
When a relationship
ends.
460
00:20:27,924 --> 00:20:30,392
Blanche, I'm not
going to get naked
461
00:20:30,460 --> 00:20:32,828
And call
the fire department.
462
00:20:41,037 --> 00:20:44,039
They're public servants.
You pay your taxes.
463
00:20:46,376 --> 00:20:47,642
All right.
464
00:20:47,710 --> 00:20:50,379
Why don't you just
try thinking of this
465
00:20:50,446 --> 00:20:51,747
As a new beginning?
466
00:20:51,814 --> 00:20:52,915
You're very special.
467
00:20:52,983 --> 00:20:54,750
If this didn't work out,
468
00:20:54,817 --> 00:20:55,918
It's probably because
469
00:20:55,986 --> 00:20:58,120
There's
somebody out there
even more wonderful
470
00:20:58,188 --> 00:20:59,355
Just waiting for you.
471
00:20:59,422 --> 00:21:02,424
I just thought...
472
00:21:02,492 --> 00:21:04,159
Miles was the one.
473
00:21:09,266 --> 00:21:11,200
This is without a doubt
474
00:21:11,268 --> 00:21:13,668
The worst production
of li'l abner
475
00:21:13,736 --> 00:21:15,737
I have ever seen!
476
00:21:19,309 --> 00:21:22,311
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