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Previously, on "Happy!"...
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It's Hailey's birthday!
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ALL: ♪ Happy birthday to... ♪
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[SHRIEKS]
5
00:00:15,406 --> 00:00:17,537
- Hailey!
- Happy birthday.
6
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- How did you know?
- That's what friends are for.
7
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You want me to kill you?
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It's not me, Pink. It's someone else.
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Orcus.
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00:00:26,107 --> 00:00:27,590
Hey, hot stuff.
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- You're cheating on me.
- [TOY THUNKS]
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- Come on!
- [SCREAMS]
13
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[AIR HISSES]
14
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- You forgot my birthday, Mom!
- Something I can't remember,
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00:00:36,514 --> 00:00:39,472
something I can't understand.
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00:00:39,474 --> 00:00:40,777
I know what I have to do now.
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00:00:40,779 --> 00:00:42,779
I'm here to see Sonny Shine.
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He's got blackmail on everyone.
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It's on videotape.
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00:00:45,523 --> 00:00:47,262
The real stuff's gotta
be at Shine Tower,
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00:00:47,264 --> 00:00:49,395
so that is where we're gonna go.
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00:00:49,397 --> 00:00:51,701
I run the third-largest
network in the nation.
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[SCREAMING]
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[GASPS]
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This is my stage, Sonny! [GRUNTS]
26
00:00:58,044 --> 00:01:00,448
[MICROPHONE FEEDBACK]
27
00:01:00,451 --> 00:01:02,408
[BONES CRUNCHING]
28
00:01:02,410 --> 00:01:04,112
- I killed it.
- [SHRIEKS]
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00:01:04,115 --> 00:01:06,118
Whatever it was that
came out of that thing,
30
00:01:06,121 --> 00:01:08,078
I put it in a jelly jar.
I stuck it in the fridge.
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00:01:08,080 --> 00:01:09,719
[GASPS, GROANING]
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- Holy shit.
- Nick, where are you?
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Some dad.
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He forgot his daughter's birthday.
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And I'm, uh, going
right there and I'm gonna
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00:01:16,511 --> 00:01:17,858
get her the stuffed,
uh... What do you call it?
37
00:01:17,860 --> 00:01:19,294
The Wishees.
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[SOBBING]
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- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
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[JAUNTY MUSIC]
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♪
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[EERIE MUSIC]
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♪
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[HOLLERING]
45
00:02:01,208 --> 00:02:02,642
[HEAVY METAL MUSIC]
46
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[SUITS SQUEAK]
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♪
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00:02:08,302 --> 00:02:10,302
[MUSIC STOPS]
49
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- [OVERLAPPING CHATTER]
- [PHONES RINGING]
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[MAN SINGING AND SCREAMING INDISTINCTLY]
51
00:02:16,701 --> 00:02:20,312
♪
52
00:02:20,314 --> 00:02:24,385
[GRUNTING]
53
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[SIGHS] Fuck.
54
00:02:25,928 --> 00:02:27,710
- [GUNSHOT]
- My ass!
55
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Sax?
56
00:02:29,061 --> 00:02:30,960
MALE NARRATOR: Two Sockatoos, one bullet...
57
00:02:30,963 --> 00:02:33,412
The timeframe: 5.6 seconds.
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The bullet leaves Merry
McCarthy's Glock 25
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00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:39,287
at 1:34 p.m. at a velocity
of 1,200 feet per second.
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00:02:39,289 --> 00:02:40,984
It penetrates the Wishee costume,
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00:02:40,986 --> 00:02:42,213
then makes a sharp,
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00:02:42,216 --> 00:02:44,379
nigh impossible change of direction,
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00:02:44,381 --> 00:02:46,990
continuing at an angle
of 27 diagonal degrees
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00:02:46,992 --> 00:02:48,688
through Sax's grassy knoll,
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00:02:48,690 --> 00:02:51,038
barely grazing his two
pimpled flesh mounds.
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00:02:51,040 --> 00:02:54,911
Defying all laws of gravity,
probability, and decency,
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00:02:54,913 --> 00:02:56,960
the bullet then bursts
free of the dark canyon,
68
00:02:56,963 --> 00:02:59,351
narrowly avoiding the
all-too-tempting target
69
00:02:59,353 --> 00:03:00,917
of Sax's sweet...
70
00:03:00,919 --> 00:03:02,267
[DING]
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00:03:02,269 --> 00:03:03,703
That's some bullet.
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00:03:03,705 --> 00:03:06,009
[FUNKY MUSIC]
73
00:03:06,011 --> 00:03:08,132
How the hell did you get
this thing out of there?
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00:03:08,135 --> 00:03:10,057
Like shoving a cat in a mason jar, Mer.
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00:03:10,059 --> 00:03:13,408
[BOTH GRUNTING, PANTING]
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00:03:13,410 --> 00:03:15,584
I don't know.
77
00:03:15,586 --> 00:03:17,412
Dipshit Dan just might
be on to something.
78
00:03:17,414 --> 00:03:19,719
Maybe this thing is from another planet.
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00:03:19,721 --> 00:03:21,677
Doug's dead. Sonny killed him.
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00:03:21,679 --> 00:03:24,941
Yeah, Doug, right, not Dan.
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Sorry.
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00:03:26,989 --> 00:03:29,772
[BOTH GRUNTING]
83
00:03:29,774 --> 00:03:32,427
What the hell were you
doing at Shine Tower anyway?
84
00:03:32,429 --> 00:03:33,997
Yeah, the million-dollar question, Mer.
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00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:35,300
I got no idea.
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00:03:35,302 --> 00:03:37,824
Last thing I remember... [GRUNTS]
87
00:03:37,826 --> 00:03:39,956
I was in your kitchen eating a PB&J.
88
00:03:39,958 --> 00:03:42,568
Oh, that wasn't "J." You ate its blood.
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00:03:42,570 --> 00:03:44,787
♪
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I know what you're thinking.
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00:03:46,313 --> 00:03:47,964
No, you don't.
92
00:03:47,966 --> 00:03:49,052
- Go on.
- What?
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00:03:49,054 --> 00:03:50,184
- Say it.
- No.
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00:03:50,186 --> 00:03:51,968
The blood brought you back to its host.
95
00:03:51,970 --> 00:03:53,579
I think you know how
full-batshit you sound.
96
00:03:53,581 --> 00:03:55,668
Sure do, and yet...
97
00:03:55,670 --> 00:03:58,975
And yet...
98
00:03:58,977 --> 00:04:00,351
- Oh, hey.
- What?
99
00:04:00,354 --> 00:04:02,675
- Found another tape.
- Oh, no more sex tape shit.
100
00:04:02,677 --> 00:04:05,112
- It's Kap Gostynski.
- Mm.
101
00:04:05,114 --> 00:04:06,635
He's the head of the network, Sax.
102
00:04:06,637 --> 00:04:07,897
Exactly, who gives a shit?
103
00:04:07,899 --> 00:04:09,072
Don't you know what that means?
104
00:04:09,074 --> 00:04:10,900
We're gonna hit Sonny where he's soft.
105
00:04:10,902 --> 00:04:12,075
No, we're not.
106
00:04:12,078 --> 00:04:14,126
What we are gonna do
is cut this thing open
107
00:04:14,129 --> 00:04:15,289
and see what's inside him.
108
00:04:15,292 --> 00:04:16,685
Now use your legs, not your back,
109
00:04:16,688 --> 00:04:18,342
count of three.
110
00:04:18,345 --> 00:04:19,953
One, two...
111
00:04:19,955 --> 00:04:22,956
[WISHEE SPLATS]
112
00:04:22,958 --> 00:04:25,480
Did you use your legs?
113
00:04:25,482 --> 00:04:31,878
♪
114
00:04:31,880 --> 00:04:35,534
- One, two, three.
- [BOTH GRUNT]
115
00:04:35,536 --> 00:04:37,927
[BOTH PANTING]
116
00:04:37,929 --> 00:04:40,495
Seriously, what the fuck is it?
117
00:04:40,497 --> 00:04:42,018
Well, according to Dayglo Doug,
118
00:04:42,020 --> 00:04:43,411
sometime in the Etruscan Age...
119
00:04:43,413 --> 00:04:45,761
- That's not funny.
- Well, look, Mer,
120
00:04:45,763 --> 00:04:47,502
I know this may be hard
to believe, but I, too,
121
00:04:47,504 --> 00:04:49,983
have had occasion to
question my sanity as of late.
122
00:04:49,985 --> 00:04:51,158
Oh, I believe it.
123
00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:52,507
Well, you know, alls I'm saying is that
124
00:04:52,509 --> 00:04:54,117
your best bet is just roll with it.
125
00:04:54,119 --> 00:04:57,643
You know, don't overthink it.
126
00:04:57,645 --> 00:05:01,516
Thinking, actually, is bad.
127
00:05:01,518 --> 00:05:02,909
Let go of me!
128
00:05:02,911 --> 00:05:06,913
I want to see Sonny Shine!
129
00:05:06,915 --> 00:05:08,871
Tell him it's Amanda Hansen!
130
00:05:08,873 --> 00:05:11,439
You have no right to keep me in here.
131
00:05:11,441 --> 00:05:12,962
[PANTING]
132
00:05:12,964 --> 00:05:14,964
[SIGHS]
133
00:05:14,966 --> 00:05:18,011
[FOREBODING MUSIC]
134
00:05:18,013 --> 00:05:19,640
[APPROACHING FOOTSTEPS]
135
00:05:19,643 --> 00:05:21,796
Miss Hansen.
136
00:05:21,799 --> 00:05:23,799
You're back. I want answers, Shine.
137
00:05:23,801 --> 00:05:25,801
You want answers.
138
00:05:25,803 --> 00:05:29,203
I want answers!
139
00:05:29,206 --> 00:05:30,466
[DEEP BREATH]
140
00:05:30,469 --> 00:05:33,166
Someone stole something
from my building.
141
00:05:33,169 --> 00:05:36,115
Two not-as-yet-but-soon-to-be
identified individuals
142
00:05:36,118 --> 00:05:39,728
broke in and made off
with something very,
143
00:05:39,730 --> 00:05:41,991
very precious to me.
144
00:05:41,993 --> 00:05:45,865
The violation of it all, Miss Hansen...
145
00:05:45,867 --> 00:05:47,693
♪
146
00:05:47,695 --> 00:05:50,000
The violation...
147
00:05:50,003 --> 00:05:52,223
But I'm sure you wouldn't
know anything about that.
148
00:05:52,226 --> 00:05:55,744
[SNIFFS] I'm sure your being here
149
00:05:55,746 --> 00:05:58,094
is a complete coincidence.
150
00:05:58,096 --> 00:05:59,922
You're covered in blood.
151
00:05:59,924 --> 00:06:02,621
I met up with an old
friend. Things got crazy.
152
00:06:02,623 --> 00:06:04,666
I don't have time for this.
153
00:06:04,668 --> 00:06:06,538
I have a show to prepare for.
154
00:06:06,540 --> 00:06:08,191
I'll keep this simple. Why are you here?
155
00:06:08,193 --> 00:06:10,585
That night...
156
00:06:10,587 --> 00:06:13,980
That night in your tower,
157
00:06:13,982 --> 00:06:16,765
something happened to me.
158
00:06:16,767 --> 00:06:20,465
Now you are gonna tell me
what you did to me or...
159
00:06:20,467 --> 00:06:22,902
[WHISTLES]
160
00:06:22,904 --> 00:06:26,122
- [SCREAMS]
- [PANTING]
161
00:06:26,124 --> 00:06:28,864
[WHIMPERING]
162
00:06:28,866 --> 00:06:31,913
[PANTING]
163
00:06:36,483 --> 00:06:38,700
Shh.
164
00:06:38,702 --> 00:06:40,615
[WISHEE CHIRPING, BURBLING]
165
00:06:40,617 --> 00:06:42,878
- Yes?
- [WISHEES CHIRPING, BURBLING]
166
00:06:42,880 --> 00:06:44,969
Yes, yes.
167
00:06:46,841 --> 00:06:49,189
No, no.
168
00:06:49,191 --> 00:06:52,192
[LAUGHS] Color me gobsmacked.
169
00:06:52,194 --> 00:06:54,760
♪
170
00:06:54,762 --> 00:06:58,894
You are special.
171
00:06:58,896 --> 00:07:01,984
I know what's missing in your life.
172
00:07:01,986 --> 00:07:03,812
And shame on them for being such
173
00:07:03,814 --> 00:07:06,859
super secret keepers!
174
00:07:06,861 --> 00:07:10,079
Miss Hansen, you're with child.
175
00:07:10,081 --> 00:07:12,995
♪
176
00:07:12,997 --> 00:07:15,215
What?
177
00:07:15,217 --> 00:07:17,609
Listen, sister, I'm with you.
178
00:07:17,611 --> 00:07:20,263
I... my hard drive's whirling away.
179
00:07:20,265 --> 00:07:22,091
[HEAVY BREATHING]
180
00:07:22,093 --> 00:07:25,007
Oh, you're a woman,
181
00:07:25,009 --> 00:07:28,620
and you've got a lot
of nonsensical emotions,
182
00:07:28,622 --> 00:07:31,100
um, brewing up in you right now.
183
00:07:31,102 --> 00:07:32,972
[SCREAMS] Let go of me!
184
00:07:32,974 --> 00:07:35,104
I know what you need.
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00:07:35,106 --> 00:07:36,845
♪
186
00:07:36,847 --> 00:07:39,848
[DARK MUSIC]
187
00:07:39,850 --> 00:07:42,024
♪
188
00:07:42,026 --> 00:07:45,158
This will fill that void
you're feeling inside.
189
00:07:45,160 --> 00:07:48,161
[EERIE MUSIC]
190
00:07:48,163 --> 00:07:49,554
♪
191
00:07:49,556 --> 00:07:51,207
Come back when you need more.
192
00:07:51,209 --> 00:07:54,254
[WHIMPERING]
193
00:07:54,256 --> 00:07:57,257
[ROMANTIC MUSIC]
194
00:07:57,259 --> 00:08:04,309
♪
195
00:08:07,704 --> 00:08:10,394
You sure can do some cool
stuff with your tongue.
196
00:08:10,397 --> 00:08:11,613
Friend showed me,
197
00:08:11,616 --> 00:08:13,360
and you don't know the half of it.
198
00:08:13,362 --> 00:08:15,884
My friend Hailey showed
me how to do this...
199
00:08:15,886 --> 00:08:18,017
♪
200
00:08:18,019 --> 00:08:19,845
Oh, wow.
201
00:08:19,847 --> 00:08:21,716
We used to do everything together...
202
00:08:21,718 --> 00:08:25,067
The carousel, flying kites by the pier.
203
00:08:25,069 --> 00:08:26,895
Uh-huh.
204
00:08:26,897 --> 00:08:29,594
Last year on her birthday,
we made paper lanterns
205
00:08:29,596 --> 00:08:31,378
with, like, all the colors.
206
00:08:31,380 --> 00:08:32,813
She was so happy.
207
00:08:32,816 --> 00:08:35,600
But this year I forgot her birthday.
208
00:08:35,602 --> 00:08:38,680
That look on her face, she...
She's just changed so much.
209
00:08:38,683 --> 00:08:40,082
For shit's sake!
210
00:08:40,084 --> 00:08:41,954
Hailey, Hailey, Hailey!
211
00:08:41,956 --> 00:08:44,217
Is that all you can talk about?
212
00:08:44,219 --> 00:08:46,741
- Uh, what?
- She's not thinking about you.
213
00:08:46,743 --> 00:08:48,613
Why are you thinking about her?
214
00:08:48,615 --> 00:08:51,137
"Friends." Ha, what a scam.
215
00:08:51,139 --> 00:08:54,532
We exist for them, and
then they just forget.
216
00:08:54,535 --> 00:08:57,404
What kind of a friend is that?
217
00:08:57,406 --> 00:09:00,799
Hmm, c'est la vie, am I right?
218
00:09:00,801 --> 00:09:02,757
I think so?
219
00:09:02,759 --> 00:09:04,629
Let's get out of here,
220
00:09:04,631 --> 00:09:06,631
do something crazy.
221
00:09:06,633 --> 00:09:10,069
Isn't this crazy?
222
00:09:10,071 --> 00:09:13,899
Sure, but I'm talking about...
223
00:09:13,901 --> 00:09:16,945
[LAUGHS] That's what she said.
224
00:09:16,947 --> 00:09:18,965
[DEVIOUS MUSIC]
225
00:09:18,968 --> 00:09:20,228
So where do you want to start?
226
00:09:20,231 --> 00:09:22,950
Give me an asshole,
a mouth, or something.
227
00:09:22,953 --> 00:09:25,040
Get my bearings.
228
00:09:25,042 --> 00:09:28,957
- [CLICKS TONGUE]
- Try the middle?
229
00:09:28,959 --> 00:09:31,962
[SAW WHIRRING]
230
00:09:33,094 --> 00:09:35,660
- [FLESH SQUELCHING]
- [WISHEE SCREECHES]
231
00:09:35,662 --> 00:09:37,313
[GRUNTS]
232
00:09:37,315 --> 00:09:40,316
[WISHEE SCREECHING]
233
00:09:40,318 --> 00:09:43,363
[DRAMATIC MUSIC]
234
00:09:43,365 --> 00:09:46,801
♪
235
00:09:46,803 --> 00:09:47,976
Third weirdest thing I've seen all day.
236
00:09:47,978 --> 00:09:49,195
Did you see where it went?
237
00:09:49,197 --> 00:09:50,936
That truck hit me, all I saw was stars
238
00:09:50,938 --> 00:09:52,285
and little birds spinning around.
239
00:09:52,287 --> 00:09:53,808
Tweet, tweet. Tweet, tweet.
240
00:09:53,810 --> 00:09:55,810
Le Dic, what the fuck
are you doing here?
241
00:09:55,812 --> 00:09:57,377
I'm doing you one, big, hard solid...
242
00:09:57,379 --> 00:09:59,292
Though I don't know why I should.
243
00:09:59,294 --> 00:10:01,424
- Someone wants you dead.
- Oh, shocker.
244
00:10:01,426 --> 00:10:02,991
Who is it this time?
245
00:10:02,993 --> 00:10:05,027
The Bug.
246
00:10:05,030 --> 00:10:06,377
What'd he say?
247
00:10:06,380 --> 00:10:08,683
He tempted me with all
my vices rolled into one.
248
00:10:08,695 --> 00:10:12,000
- Ladies, liquor, and luck.
- [WOMEN MOAN]
249
00:10:12,002 --> 00:10:13,872
He baited that hook
250
00:10:13,874 --> 00:10:16,091
with the finest Cajun country pie
251
00:10:16,093 --> 00:10:18,354
you've ever almost tasted...
252
00:10:18,356 --> 00:10:19,793
By pie, I mean pussy.
253
00:10:19,796 --> 00:10:20,839
Yep.
254
00:10:20,842 --> 00:10:22,401
This Bug gets me all drugged up,
255
00:10:22,404 --> 00:10:24,186
says he's looking for a taxi driver.
256
00:10:24,188 --> 00:10:25,840
Someone's been getting
up in his business,
257
00:10:25,842 --> 00:10:28,016
robbed his house, busted
up one of his operations,
258
00:10:28,018 --> 00:10:29,113
and he wants a name,
259
00:10:29,116 --> 00:10:30,410
and he just knows I can give it to him.
260
00:10:30,412 --> 00:10:31,660
So I play it cool, right?
261
00:10:31,663 --> 00:10:34,456
But he looks at you with
those big, round bug eyes...
262
00:10:34,459 --> 00:10:36,765
Shiny like an oil slick, and I'm smart.
263
00:10:36,768 --> 00:10:38,983
I say, "I tell you a
name, I'm as good as dead.
264
00:10:38,986 --> 00:10:40,289
So I'll do one better,
265
00:10:40,291 --> 00:10:41,813
and I'll bring him straight to you."
266
00:10:41,815 --> 00:10:43,031
I'm touched, Le Dic, really.
267
00:10:43,033 --> 00:10:44,163
I ain't criss-crossing you, Sax.
268
00:10:44,165 --> 00:10:46,034
- That is why I'm here.
- Yeah, right.
269
00:10:46,036 --> 00:10:47,775
- Honor amongst scumbags?
- Exactly.
270
00:10:47,777 --> 00:10:50,256
This Bug... he ain't one of us.
271
00:10:50,258 --> 00:10:52,515
To tell you the truth, well,
this ain't the first time
272
00:10:52,518 --> 00:10:55,043
that I seen him.
273
00:10:55,045 --> 00:10:57,350
I used to be into
some weird sexual shit.
274
00:10:57,352 --> 00:10:59,744
I ain't too proud to admit it...
275
00:10:59,746 --> 00:11:02,877
Role-play, getting beat up, whipped,
276
00:11:02,879 --> 00:11:05,053
wolf bag, scatty pants...
277
00:11:05,055 --> 00:11:06,751
Jesus Christ. Get to the point.
278
00:11:06,753 --> 00:11:08,274
I moved through dark circles...
279
00:11:08,276 --> 00:11:10,189
Nasty, pervy...
280
00:11:10,191 --> 00:11:14,976
Till one night, I end up
at this high-roller's orgy,
281
00:11:14,978 --> 00:11:17,370
latex lovers dressed like animals.
282
00:11:17,372 --> 00:11:19,811
I don't remember what happened,
but I remember that Bug.
283
00:11:19,814 --> 00:11:22,114
And he was right there in
the middle of all of it.
284
00:11:22,116 --> 00:11:26,074
Whatever happened there, well...
285
00:11:26,076 --> 00:11:29,208
it made me do caca in my Hanes.
286
00:11:29,210 --> 00:11:30,905
I never wanted to go
back there after that.
287
00:11:30,907 --> 00:11:32,791
- And yet...
- Six, seven times tops.
288
00:11:32,794 --> 00:11:34,256
Okay, where was this orgy?
289
00:11:34,258 --> 00:11:36,302
That's the crazy part.
290
00:11:36,304 --> 00:11:37,912
Shine Tower,
291
00:11:37,914 --> 00:11:41,263
you know, that kiddy clown on TV.
292
00:11:41,265 --> 00:11:43,178
Yeah, well...
293
00:11:43,180 --> 00:11:45,398
roll this up and smoke it, Sax.
294
00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:47,487
A little bird told me another one
295
00:11:47,489 --> 00:11:49,097
of those nasty parties is going off,
296
00:11:49,099 --> 00:11:50,577
and I mean tonight.
297
00:11:50,579 --> 00:11:51,970
[PHONE RINGING]
298
00:11:51,972 --> 00:11:54,973
Look, we need... oh.
299
00:11:54,975 --> 00:11:57,410
- [STAMMERS]
- Uh, hey.
300
00:11:57,412 --> 00:12:00,021
Nick, I'm gonna need
you to take Hailey today.
301
00:12:00,023 --> 00:12:03,285
- Uh, now's not a good time...
- Don't you dare.
302
00:12:03,287 --> 00:12:06,114
Don't you dare finish
that sentence, Nicholas.
303
00:12:06,116 --> 00:12:08,272
Don't you dare!
304
00:12:08,275 --> 00:12:10,379
[PHONE LINE BEEPING]
305
00:12:10,381 --> 00:12:13,905
[SHOES SQUEAKING]
306
00:12:13,907 --> 00:12:15,950
Uh, yeah, I gotta
take care of something.
307
00:12:15,952 --> 00:12:16,951
Really? Now?
308
00:12:16,953 --> 00:12:19,258
You, I want in to Pervapalooza.
309
00:12:19,260 --> 00:12:21,173
Can do.
310
00:12:21,175 --> 00:12:25,003
But you're gonna need a costume.
311
00:12:25,005 --> 00:12:27,832
Warden.
312
00:12:27,834 --> 00:12:29,355
[SCOFFS]
313
00:12:29,357 --> 00:12:32,140
Goddamn Wolfpack.
314
00:12:32,142 --> 00:12:34,142
You can stand.
315
00:12:34,144 --> 00:12:37,319
Won't be long.
316
00:12:37,321 --> 00:12:38,930
Not a hockey fan?
317
00:12:38,932 --> 00:12:41,236
Calcio Storico.
318
00:12:41,238 --> 00:12:42,542
600 years old.
319
00:12:42,544 --> 00:12:44,892
They still play it once a year.
320
00:12:44,894 --> 00:12:47,547
Piazza Santa Croce.
321
00:12:47,549 --> 00:12:49,418
That's in Florence.
322
00:12:49,420 --> 00:12:52,030
Florence, Italy.
323
00:12:52,032 --> 00:12:55,250
Now, if you were to
turn up with your stick,
324
00:12:55,252 --> 00:12:58,340
and your pads, and your helmet...
325
00:12:58,342 --> 00:13:00,299
they'd shove them all up your ass
326
00:13:00,301 --> 00:13:03,258
and you'd buy them a pint afterwards.
327
00:13:03,260 --> 00:13:06,475
Makes your hockey seem
rather like foxy boxing,
328
00:13:06,478 --> 00:13:09,221
which I do happen to
hold in high regard...
329
00:13:09,223 --> 00:13:11,353
Foxy boxing, that is,
330
00:13:11,355 --> 00:13:12,572
not hockey.
331
00:13:12,574 --> 00:13:17,403
Let's talk about, uh, this whole...
332
00:13:17,405 --> 00:13:20,885
Kumbaya thing you got going on.
333
00:13:20,887 --> 00:13:21,973
"Kumbaya"?
334
00:13:21,975 --> 00:13:24,062
I see what's going on out there...
335
00:13:24,064 --> 00:13:27,892
Aryan Brotherhood,
Black Gangster Disciples,
336
00:13:27,894 --> 00:13:31,983
and Nuestra Familia all
getting along together
337
00:13:31,985 --> 00:13:33,898
like a Waldorf salad.
338
00:13:33,900 --> 00:13:35,464
There hasn't been a violent incident
339
00:13:35,466 --> 00:13:38,424
or a disciplinary infraction
340
00:13:38,426 --> 00:13:42,036
of any kind in over 72 hours.
341
00:13:42,038 --> 00:13:45,039
- That's lovely.
- That's not lovely.
342
00:13:45,041 --> 00:13:48,477
That's fucking unacceptable,
343
00:13:48,479 --> 00:13:51,916
because if the gangs
aren't fighting each other,
344
00:13:51,918 --> 00:13:55,223
they're fighting the
guards, they're fighting me,
345
00:13:55,225 --> 00:13:57,312
and I have to keep the peace.
346
00:13:57,314 --> 00:14:00,054
And, uh... [LAUGHS]
347
00:14:00,056 --> 00:14:02,143
Ooh. [HISSES THROUGH TEETH]
348
00:14:02,145 --> 00:14:05,233
Keeping the peace can hurt.
349
00:14:05,235 --> 00:14:07,105
[TENSE MUSIC]
350
00:14:07,107 --> 00:14:08,541
You get me?
351
00:14:08,543 --> 00:14:11,413
- I think I do.
- I like to hear that.
352
00:14:11,415 --> 00:14:14,025
I like that you and I
353
00:14:14,027 --> 00:14:16,418
can be on the level.
354
00:14:16,420 --> 00:14:17,985
It stops,
355
00:14:17,987 --> 00:14:20,746
or you are gonna spend
the rest of your days
356
00:14:20,749 --> 00:14:24,186
with that hockey stick
shoved up your ass,
357
00:14:24,189 --> 00:14:27,255
and we won't be grabbing any pints,
358
00:14:27,257 --> 00:14:30,171
you and me.
359
00:14:30,173 --> 00:14:34,088
Understand?
360
00:14:34,090 --> 00:14:36,961
I'm gonna need you to say
361
00:14:36,963 --> 00:14:39,050
you understand.
362
00:14:39,052 --> 00:14:41,182
♪
363
00:14:41,184 --> 00:14:43,576
Perfectly.
364
00:14:43,578 --> 00:14:47,449
[MELLOW MUSIC]
365
00:14:47,451 --> 00:14:49,321
This is your place?
366
00:14:49,323 --> 00:14:52,757
I, you know, crash here with my friend.
367
00:14:52,760 --> 00:14:54,630
The infamous Hailey.
368
00:14:54,632 --> 00:14:56,788
No, not... not Hailey, Nick.
369
00:14:56,791 --> 00:14:58,760
Excusez-moi?
370
00:14:58,763 --> 00:15:01,114
It... it's complicated.
371
00:15:01,117 --> 00:15:03,161
I'm complicated. Try me.
372
00:15:03,163 --> 00:15:05,293
Well, I haven't told anybody this,
373
00:15:05,295 --> 00:15:08,470
but I got a new friend, Nick.
374
00:15:08,472 --> 00:15:10,255
He's Hailey's dad.
375
00:15:10,257 --> 00:15:12,735
She stopped believing and he needed me,
376
00:15:12,737 --> 00:15:14,999
so I'm Nick's friend now.
377
00:15:15,001 --> 00:15:17,784
You're telling me you jumped friends?
378
00:15:17,786 --> 00:15:22,136
[LAUGHING]
379
00:15:22,138 --> 00:15:25,139
Sweetie, I know you're
going through a hard time,
380
00:15:25,141 --> 00:15:27,228
but what you're saying is shiznuts.
381
00:15:27,230 --> 00:15:28,577
Your friend's your friend.
382
00:15:28,579 --> 00:15:31,058
When your friend stops
believing, you disappear.
383
00:15:31,060 --> 00:15:33,321
We don't change friends.
384
00:15:33,323 --> 00:15:36,986
I mean, if we could do
that, are we even imaginary?
385
00:15:36,989 --> 00:15:39,545
Oh, I'm imaginary, all right.
386
00:15:39,547 --> 00:15:42,156
I'm an imaginary lemon.
387
00:15:42,158 --> 00:15:43,679
I can't help anybody.
388
00:15:43,681 --> 00:15:45,507
Okay, Happy?
389
00:15:45,509 --> 00:15:47,683
You're killing my buzz.
390
00:15:47,685 --> 00:15:50,686
[STIRRING MUSIC]
391
00:15:50,688 --> 00:15:53,602
♪
392
00:15:53,604 --> 00:15:56,823
What happened to that
badass bucking bronco
393
00:15:56,825 --> 00:15:59,043
who rallied the troops and took down
394
00:15:59,045 --> 00:16:00,696
Psycho Santa Claus?
395
00:16:00,698 --> 00:16:03,612
I... I did do that, didn't I?
396
00:16:03,614 --> 00:16:05,353
Hell yeah, you did.
397
00:16:05,355 --> 00:16:08,530
When you said "pick on
someone your own size,"
398
00:16:08,532 --> 00:16:11,577
you could have wrung out my
panties with a mop bucket.
399
00:16:11,579 --> 00:16:14,145
It's time to forget
about your friends...
400
00:16:14,147 --> 00:16:18,192
All of them... Before
they forget about you.
401
00:16:18,194 --> 00:16:21,239
So, you ever done it before?
402
00:16:21,241 --> 00:16:22,544
- "It"?
- Yeah.
403
00:16:22,546 --> 00:16:24,372
You know, it...
404
00:16:24,374 --> 00:16:26,374
- With a girl.
- Oh!
405
00:16:26,376 --> 00:16:28,333
[CLEARS THROAT] It.
406
00:16:28,335 --> 00:16:29,725
[STAMMERING] Yeah, it.
407
00:16:29,727 --> 00:16:31,858
Totally. Oh, tons of times.
408
00:16:31,861 --> 00:16:36,167
I'm really good at it.
409
00:16:36,169 --> 00:16:38,082
Oh, boy.
410
00:16:38,084 --> 00:16:41,043
Don't worry, Happy, I got this.
411
00:16:44,739 --> 00:16:46,959
- [PARTY HORNS BLOWING]
- ALL: ♪ Happy birthday... ♪
412
00:16:46,962 --> 00:16:51,051
Um, so I, um...
413
00:16:51,053 --> 00:16:52,531
I... I kinda got held up.
414
00:16:52,533 --> 00:16:53,749
Huh?
415
00:16:53,751 --> 00:16:56,056
But, um...
416
00:16:56,058 --> 00:16:59,016
I know what day it was.
417
00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:00,619
- It's okay.
- No, it's not.
418
00:17:00,622 --> 00:17:04,977
You know, I... 'cause I meant to...
419
00:17:04,980 --> 00:17:06,893
with the balloons...
420
00:17:06,895 --> 00:17:10,288
eating, uh, the sugary...
421
00:17:10,290 --> 00:17:12,899
with the clowns holding farm animals,
422
00:17:12,901 --> 00:17:14,357
little favor things.
423
00:17:14,360 --> 00:17:16,358
Are you trying to
describe a birthday party?
424
00:17:16,361 --> 00:17:19,558
Yeah, the point... The point is, um...
425
00:17:19,560 --> 00:17:22,126
[MELLOW ROCK MUSIC
PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS]
426
00:17:22,128 --> 00:17:25,868
It... it was our first birthday,
427
00:17:25,870 --> 00:17:28,915
you know, as
father-daughter, and, um...
428
00:17:28,917 --> 00:17:31,787
♪
429
00:17:31,789 --> 00:17:35,139
It was important.
430
00:17:35,141 --> 00:17:37,315
I'm sorry.
431
00:17:37,317 --> 00:17:39,317
♪
432
00:17:39,319 --> 00:17:41,928
24 hour rule.
433
00:17:41,930 --> 00:17:44,104
We can do something today.
434
00:17:44,106 --> 00:17:46,715
♪
435
00:17:46,717 --> 00:17:48,630
- You can't.
- No, I'd love to.
436
00:17:48,632 --> 00:17:49,814
I'd love to.
437
00:17:49,817 --> 00:17:51,329
I... I... there's just
this thing that I gotta...
438
00:17:51,331 --> 00:17:53,775
ALL: Birthday!
- Oh, thank Christ.
439
00:17:53,778 --> 00:17:56,160
ALL: ♪ Birthdays are lovely
and birthdays are sweet ♪
440
00:17:56,162 --> 00:17:59,077
♪ So thanks for choosing
us and choosing our treats ♪
441
00:17:59,080 --> 00:18:01,252
- Where you going?
- Bathroom.
442
00:18:01,254 --> 00:18:02,580
You need help?
443
00:18:02,583 --> 00:18:04,690
ALL: ♪ World-famous
Zoodle Cake for $13.99! ♪
444
00:18:04,692 --> 00:18:05,734
- No way!
- Yes way!
445
00:18:05,736 --> 00:18:07,736
- Hooray!
- Birthday!
446
00:18:07,738 --> 00:18:09,436
♪ So thanks for choosing us and ♪
447
00:18:09,439 --> 00:18:11,740
[ALL TRAIL OFF]
448
00:18:11,742 --> 00:18:14,743
[BRYAN FERRY'S "SLAVE
TO LOVE" OVER SPEAKERS]
449
00:18:14,745 --> 00:18:17,398
♪
450
00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:21,054
[LIGHTER FLICKING]
451
00:18:21,056 --> 00:18:23,404
Trouble getting it up?
452
00:18:23,406 --> 00:18:28,192
♪
453
00:18:28,194 --> 00:18:29,976
I am so happy right now.
454
00:18:29,978 --> 00:18:32,674
No, really, I was
afraid that you was dead.
455
00:18:32,676 --> 00:18:34,154
I mean, getting shot in the face
456
00:18:34,156 --> 00:18:36,287
is not exactly a night
out at Studio 54...
457
00:18:36,289 --> 00:18:38,245
Not to mention the ever-present risk
458
00:18:38,247 --> 00:18:39,638
of a catheter infection.
459
00:18:39,640 --> 00:18:41,901
For a guy like you,
460
00:18:41,903 --> 00:18:45,644
the possibilities are endless.
461
00:18:45,646 --> 00:18:48,168
And then...
462
00:18:48,170 --> 00:18:50,301
I wouldn't be able...
To kill me yourself, yes.
463
00:18:50,303 --> 00:18:52,912
- Yeah.
- Very sweet...
464
00:18:52,914 --> 00:18:56,133
As sweet as that ripe,
red little cherry.
465
00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:59,788
How's life since I took yours?
466
00:18:59,790 --> 00:19:02,008
I'm walking a bit more like
John Wayne because of you,
467
00:19:02,010 --> 00:19:04,706
but, eh, I've been worse.
468
00:19:04,708 --> 00:19:07,666
Yourself?
469
00:19:07,668 --> 00:19:10,190
[GASPS] Whoa!
470
00:19:10,192 --> 00:19:13,933
Yeah, life has been, um, interesting
471
00:19:13,935 --> 00:19:15,239
since our last tango.
472
00:19:15,241 --> 00:19:16,762
All right, you're already boring me.
473
00:19:16,764 --> 00:19:19,156
Maybe you're feeling
suicidal coming here.
474
00:19:19,158 --> 00:19:21,027
Maybe you think that I
don't dare fuck you up
475
00:19:21,029 --> 00:19:23,671
in the middle of Greaser Gary's
Shit and Biscuit Roadhouse.
476
00:19:23,674 --> 00:19:28,034
Either way, this...
477
00:19:28,036 --> 00:19:31,124
is not gonna end well for you.
478
00:19:31,126 --> 00:19:33,257
- Don't cause a scene, Sax.
- [GRUNTS]
479
00:19:33,259 --> 00:19:35,433
Think of all the children...
480
00:19:35,435 --> 00:19:37,174
Especially yours.
481
00:19:37,176 --> 00:19:40,177
[SINISTER MUSIC]
482
00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:42,004
The only thing I'm thinking about now
483
00:19:42,006 --> 00:19:43,702
is how I'm gonna rip out your piss tube
484
00:19:43,704 --> 00:19:46,183
and shove it into your
good eye until I hit brain.
485
00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:47,967
It's fascinating.
486
00:19:47,969 --> 00:19:51,057
When we first met, you
had nothing to lose,
487
00:19:51,059 --> 00:19:53,277
nothing to live for but that next drink,
488
00:19:53,279 --> 00:19:54,608
next blackout.
489
00:19:54,611 --> 00:19:56,758
It gave you a kind of invulnerability.
490
00:19:56,760 --> 00:19:59,108
But now...
491
00:19:59,110 --> 00:20:00,849
don't you see?
492
00:20:00,851 --> 00:20:02,764
[BOTTLE SQUELCHES]
493
00:20:02,766 --> 00:20:05,245
Daddy can't be naughty.
494
00:20:05,247 --> 00:20:06,942
Imagine she comes out of the bathroom
495
00:20:06,944 --> 00:20:09,249
and sees papa dragged off to prison.
496
00:20:09,251 --> 00:20:12,078
And just when you came
back into her life.
497
00:20:12,080 --> 00:20:13,819
[SCOFFS]
498
00:20:13,821 --> 00:20:17,910
She's a complicated
little thing, that Hailey.
499
00:20:17,912 --> 00:20:19,259
Say her name again.
500
00:20:19,261 --> 00:20:21,914
I am so glad that she
and I had the chance
501
00:20:21,916 --> 00:20:24,308
to get to know each
other over the holidays.
502
00:20:24,310 --> 00:20:26,440
I know you think
you're a real sick fuck,
503
00:20:26,442 --> 00:20:30,096
but trust me.
504
00:20:30,098 --> 00:20:32,403
You're a goddamn amateur
compared to what goes on
505
00:20:32,405 --> 00:20:35,014
on top of this skull right here.
506
00:20:35,016 --> 00:20:37,234
Now, you're not half
capable of understanding
507
00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:40,324
what the fuck I would do to you
if you ever touched that child.
508
00:20:40,326 --> 00:20:42,326
Don't insult me.
509
00:20:42,328 --> 00:20:44,284
I can assure you I have no intention
510
00:20:44,286 --> 00:20:46,504
of touching your daughter.
511
00:20:46,506 --> 00:20:48,549
What I have in mind for you
512
00:20:48,551 --> 00:20:51,204
is on a completely
different level of fuckery.
513
00:20:51,206 --> 00:20:53,772
You truly have no idea.
514
00:20:53,774 --> 00:20:57,079
It almost makes me feel...
515
00:20:57,081 --> 00:21:00,909
well, no.
516
00:21:00,911 --> 00:21:03,172
But she has been in there
a long time, hasn't she?
517
00:21:03,174 --> 00:21:06,132
I hope she's okay.
518
00:21:06,134 --> 00:21:08,439
Make a wish.
519
00:21:08,441 --> 00:21:10,528
♪
520
00:21:10,530 --> 00:21:13,057
- [GRUNTS]
- Oh, my God, Dad!
521
00:21:13,060 --> 00:21:14,229
Washing your hands, that's good.
522
00:21:14,231 --> 00:21:15,315
There are a lot of germs everywhere.
523
00:21:15,317 --> 00:21:17,926
I'll let you finish up.
524
00:21:17,928 --> 00:21:20,320
["SLAVE TO LOVE"
CONTINUES OVER SPEAKERS]
525
00:21:20,322 --> 00:21:24,063
♪ And the spring is turning ♪
526
00:21:24,065 --> 00:21:25,978
Grab your shit. We're
going to Grandma's.
527
00:21:25,980 --> 00:21:28,285
- Grandma's dead.
- [SIGHS]
528
00:21:28,287 --> 00:21:30,096
Not that grandma.
529
00:21:30,099 --> 00:21:33,333
- ♪ I can see your smile
- ALL: ♪ Slave to love ♪
530
00:21:33,335 --> 00:21:35,509
- ♪ Na-na-na-na ♪
- ♪ Oh! ♪
531
00:21:35,511 --> 00:21:38,512
[FUNKY MUSIC]
532
00:21:38,514 --> 00:21:40,035
♪
533
00:21:40,037 --> 00:21:41,515
[DOORBELL BUZZES]
534
00:21:41,517 --> 00:21:46,390
♪
535
00:21:46,392 --> 00:21:49,218
[DOOR CREAKS]
536
00:21:49,220 --> 00:21:52,623
I bought three boxes of
Samoas from you last week,
537
00:21:52,626 --> 00:21:54,843
Now what, are you crooks
trying to rob my pension?
538
00:21:54,846 --> 00:21:56,356
Mom, Ma, it's me.
539
00:21:56,358 --> 00:21:58,534
Nicky.
540
00:22:02,364 --> 00:22:04,364
Drawing a blank.
541
00:22:04,366 --> 00:22:07,846
Don't you recognize your own kid?
542
00:22:07,848 --> 00:22:09,238
She don't look nothing like me.
543
00:22:09,240 --> 00:22:10,457
Not her, me.
544
00:22:10,459 --> 00:22:12,503
Nicky, I'm busting your balls.
545
00:22:12,505 --> 00:22:13,861
I'm fuckin' with you. Come on in.
546
00:22:13,864 --> 00:22:15,255
You look like shit, by the way.
547
00:22:15,258 --> 00:22:17,910
Entrez-vous, kids.
548
00:22:17,913 --> 00:22:19,509
Um...
549
00:22:19,512 --> 00:22:20,641
[DOOR SLAMS]
550
00:22:20,643 --> 00:22:22,513
Yeah, yeah, I know it's been a while.
551
00:22:22,515 --> 00:22:26,908
Time flies when we're dodging
familial responsibilities.
552
00:22:26,910 --> 00:22:28,562
- Who wants a drink?
- Eh, no.
553
00:22:28,564 --> 00:22:30,477
I'm... I'm dry-ish.
554
00:22:30,479 --> 00:22:31,772
One bullshit. How about you?
555
00:22:31,775 --> 00:22:33,306
Now, Ma, come on.
556
00:22:33,308 --> 00:22:36,091
What? Virgin.
557
00:22:36,093 --> 00:22:38,093
- It's not.
- No booze for the kid!
558
00:22:38,095 --> 00:22:41,009
It's called manners, you ape.
559
00:22:41,011 --> 00:22:44,186
Whatever floats your boat.
560
00:22:44,188 --> 00:22:47,276
Oh, I'm just glad you got back in time.
561
00:22:47,278 --> 00:22:49,409
I got the cancer.
562
00:22:49,411 --> 00:22:51,150
The big "C".
563
00:22:51,152 --> 00:22:53,500
Doctors give me 15, 20 good years left.
564
00:22:53,502 --> 00:22:55,328
Ah, Christ, Ma.
565
00:22:55,330 --> 00:22:57,939
It's already left a mark.
566
00:22:57,941 --> 00:22:59,550
I'm sorry.
567
00:22:59,552 --> 00:23:01,160
Well,
568
00:23:01,162 --> 00:23:04,293
not as much as he is, kiddo.
569
00:23:04,295 --> 00:23:05,686
Right here.
570
00:23:05,688 --> 00:23:08,254
Right here's where the
milky magic used to happen.
571
00:23:08,256 --> 00:23:09,560
Why are we sharing this?
572
00:23:09,562 --> 00:23:12,954
It's called conversation, you orangutan.
573
00:23:12,956 --> 00:23:15,304
All right, brass tacks now.
574
00:23:15,306 --> 00:23:17,611
Who's my competition? [SNARLS]
575
00:23:17,613 --> 00:23:20,397
Uh, Janet, this is, uh...
576
00:23:20,399 --> 00:23:24,270
This is your granddaughter, Hailey.
577
00:23:24,272 --> 00:23:26,446
And she has a name.
578
00:23:26,448 --> 00:23:28,579
Oh, and by the looks of
things, she's had it for what?
579
00:23:28,581 --> 00:23:30,276
Nine, ten years?
580
00:23:30,278 --> 00:23:32,583
11, just.
581
00:23:32,585 --> 00:23:34,541
Oh, belated.
582
00:23:34,543 --> 00:23:37,979
All right, look... All
right, I know it's been
583
00:23:37,981 --> 00:23:39,285
a long time, and... and I know
584
00:23:39,287 --> 00:23:40,547
I should have told you about the kid.
585
00:23:40,549 --> 00:23:42,593
- And the kid about her.
- I was gonna get to it!
586
00:23:42,595 --> 00:23:44,333
You know, we had a lot to cover!
587
00:23:44,335 --> 00:23:46,836
But we're here now, right, all together.
588
00:23:46,839 --> 00:23:49,019
And I just thought
maybe it'd be a good time
589
00:23:49,022 --> 00:23:51,141
for yous to get to
know each other, right?
590
00:23:51,144 --> 00:23:53,081
- Bonding time.
- "Bonding time"?
591
00:23:53,083 --> 00:23:56,563
- Bonding time.
- "Bonding."
592
00:23:56,565 --> 00:23:58,652
I'll bond you with the back of my hand,
593
00:23:58,654 --> 00:24:00,219
you bed-wetting bastard!
594
00:24:00,221 --> 00:24:01,750
- Now out with it!
- Stay here.
595
00:24:01,753 --> 00:24:04,094
[GRUNTS, SIGHS]
596
00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:08,314
As I'm sure you're aware, I got a, um,
597
00:24:08,316 --> 00:24:11,186
tendency to attract
negative energy to me...
598
00:24:11,188 --> 00:24:15,016
Nothing I can't handle...
But with the kid...
599
00:24:15,018 --> 00:24:18,367
You know, if Hailey's close
to me, then she ain't safe.
600
00:24:18,369 --> 00:24:19,761
[MUFFLED] You know?
601
00:24:19,764 --> 00:24:21,631
She needs her Grandma Sax.
602
00:24:21,634 --> 00:24:23,329
- "Grandma"?
- Okay, Janet.
603
00:24:23,331 --> 00:24:25,984
But I just need someone
I can trust who can...
604
00:24:25,986 --> 00:24:28,203
All right, don't get
your tighties in a tizzy.
605
00:24:28,205 --> 00:24:29,640
I've been taking care of things
606
00:24:29,642 --> 00:24:31,337
since before your butthole turned brown.
607
00:24:31,339 --> 00:24:33,295
I'll take care of her now.
608
00:24:33,297 --> 00:24:35,515
I'll watch the kid.
609
00:24:35,517 --> 00:24:38,518
[SOFT DRAMATIC MUSIC]
610
00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:40,346
♪
611
00:24:40,348 --> 00:24:42,261
[SIGHS]
612
00:24:42,263 --> 00:24:44,132
[CLICKS TONGUE]
613
00:24:44,134 --> 00:24:45,477
Let me guess. You gotta go.
614
00:24:45,480 --> 00:24:46,827
There's only one thing I want,
615
00:24:46,830 --> 00:24:48,046
and that's for you to be safe.
616
00:24:48,049 --> 00:24:50,051
And that's why I gotta
do what I gotta do.
617
00:24:50,053 --> 00:24:52,140
Sure. Go.
618
00:24:52,142 --> 00:24:54,352
♪
619
00:24:54,362 --> 00:24:56,101
You're gonna be okay
here. You know that, right?
620
00:24:56,103 --> 00:24:57,537
I'm gonna come back for you.
621
00:24:57,539 --> 00:25:00,192
Yep.
622
00:25:00,194 --> 00:25:02,803
Okay.
623
00:25:02,805 --> 00:25:05,327
Try to keep her away from
the goddamn moonshine.
624
00:25:05,329 --> 00:25:08,548
I mean, that shit will just
knock a horse on its ass.
625
00:25:08,550 --> 00:25:11,464
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
626
00:25:11,466 --> 00:25:14,772
You just need to relax.
627
00:25:14,774 --> 00:25:17,078
Okay... [GOOFY WHINNY]
628
00:25:17,080 --> 00:25:18,471
Those come off?
629
00:25:18,473 --> 00:25:22,214
They're not the only
things that can come off.
630
00:25:22,216 --> 00:25:25,696
♪ Uh, touch me ♪
631
00:25:25,698 --> 00:25:28,263
♪ I wanna feel your body ♪
632
00:25:28,265 --> 00:25:31,266
♪ Ooh ♪
633
00:25:31,268 --> 00:25:34,269
[SAMANTHA FOX'S "TOUCH
ME" PLAYING OVER BOOM BOX]
634
00:25:34,271 --> 00:25:36,533
[GRUNTS]
635
00:25:36,535 --> 00:25:38,752
- ♪ This is the night ♪
- ♪ Touch me ♪
636
00:25:38,754 --> 00:25:42,234
♪ Touch me, I want to feel your body ♪
637
00:25:42,236 --> 00:25:46,717
♪ Your heartbeat next to mine ♪
638
00:25:46,719 --> 00:25:50,907
- ♪ This is the night ♪
- ♪ 'Cause I want your body ♪
639
00:25:50,910 --> 00:25:54,246
♪ All the time ♪
640
00:25:54,248 --> 00:25:57,771
Well, that's something
I've never seen before.
641
00:25:57,773 --> 00:26:01,253
Do you think it'll
taste like bananas now?
642
00:26:01,255 --> 00:26:02,462
I don't know.
643
00:26:02,465 --> 00:26:04,648
Haven't you ever tasted
your own horn before?
644
00:26:04,650 --> 00:26:07,128
Well, I'm not really built that way.
645
00:26:07,130 --> 00:26:08,434
Plus, if I could,
646
00:26:08,436 --> 00:26:10,262
I don't think I'd ever leave the house.
647
00:26:10,264 --> 00:26:12,264
I love bananas.
648
00:26:12,266 --> 00:26:14,440
All right, enough talk.
649
00:26:14,442 --> 00:26:15,789
Here it comes.
650
00:26:15,791 --> 00:26:17,835
Here comes the fun.
651
00:26:17,837 --> 00:26:20,272
♪ Touch me ♪
652
00:26:20,274 --> 00:26:23,407
- Are you ready?
- [GULPS]
653
00:26:26,027 --> 00:26:28,219
So then he grabbed the
gun and shot Santa Claus
654
00:26:28,222 --> 00:26:30,150
right between the eyes.
655
00:26:30,153 --> 00:26:31,892
[LIQUID POURING]
656
00:26:31,894 --> 00:26:34,373
And that's how I met my dad.
657
00:26:34,375 --> 00:26:36,897
Much better story than how I met my dad.
658
00:26:36,899 --> 00:26:38,333
- How?
- [GRUNTS]
659
00:26:38,335 --> 00:26:39,857
At his funeral.
660
00:26:39,859 --> 00:26:42,599
I, uh... ah, there you are.
661
00:26:42,601 --> 00:26:44,252
[SPITS]
662
00:26:44,254 --> 00:26:47,691
Ah, bless you, child.
663
00:26:47,693 --> 00:26:49,127
- Is this my dad?
- Mm-hmm.
664
00:26:49,129 --> 00:26:50,781
Yeah, eighth grade.
665
00:26:50,783 --> 00:26:52,826
That picture speaks a thousand words,
666
00:26:52,828 --> 00:26:54,698
most of them not for publication.
667
00:26:54,700 --> 00:26:56,830
Nicky was the soft
one... Runt of the litter.
668
00:26:56,832 --> 00:26:59,673
Everyone thought he was special,
669
00:26:59,676 --> 00:27:01,966
so much so we thought about
taking him out to the woods
670
00:27:01,968 --> 00:27:05,360
and just setting him free.
671
00:27:05,362 --> 00:27:07,362
I'm joking.
672
00:27:07,364 --> 00:27:10,061
Honey, freshen.
673
00:27:10,063 --> 00:27:14,108
So, you are a Sax, hmm?
674
00:27:14,110 --> 00:27:17,329
[SPITS] From Saxi, in the Nordic.
675
00:27:17,331 --> 00:27:19,113
That's Scandinavian.
676
00:27:19,115 --> 00:27:21,942
In fact, that's where we
get the Sax family crest...
677
00:27:21,944 --> 00:27:25,163
Two gnomes crossing
their itty bitty daggers
678
00:27:25,165 --> 00:27:28,122
beneath a flag that reads...
679
00:27:28,124 --> 00:27:30,124
"Size don't matter."
680
00:27:30,126 --> 00:27:32,344
[FUNKY MUSIC]
681
00:27:32,346 --> 00:27:33,899
You know, us Sax's, sometimes,
682
00:27:33,902 --> 00:27:36,261
we get the short end of the stick.
683
00:27:36,263 --> 00:27:38,350
But we fight back, always.
684
00:27:38,352 --> 00:27:40,134
And so what about you, child?
685
00:27:40,136 --> 00:27:41,919
Any fight in you?
686
00:27:41,921 --> 00:27:45,139
When I have to, but it's
hard when you're little.
687
00:27:45,141 --> 00:27:48,012
That's when you fight dirty.
688
00:27:48,014 --> 00:27:50,797
That's the first thing
I taught your father.
689
00:27:50,799 --> 00:27:53,017
The bigger they are,
690
00:27:53,019 --> 00:27:55,280
the more it hurts below the belt.
691
00:27:55,282 --> 00:27:57,456
♪
692
00:27:57,458 --> 00:28:01,460
Tricky Dick Nixon, that
is a good cocktail, child.
693
00:28:01,462 --> 00:28:03,723
Don't touch.
694
00:28:03,725 --> 00:28:06,030
[SIGHS]
695
00:28:06,032 --> 00:28:08,728
Good afternoon. I'm Julie.
696
00:28:08,730 --> 00:28:10,991
May I call you Amanda?
697
00:28:10,993 --> 00:28:13,994
Your blood pressure's
great. Your weight's great.
698
00:28:13,996 --> 00:28:16,431
Your temp is 98.6 on the dot.
699
00:28:16,433 --> 00:28:18,129
- Any pain?
- Nope.
700
00:28:18,131 --> 00:28:19,434
- Spotting?
- Nope.
701
00:28:19,436 --> 00:28:22,220
How about change in
mood? Any depression?
702
00:28:22,222 --> 00:28:24,178
I don't want to talk about it, Julie.
703
00:28:24,180 --> 00:28:27,051
Aww, well, a little bit of
moodiness is to be expected
704
00:28:27,053 --> 00:28:30,837
with the change in hormones.
705
00:28:30,839 --> 00:28:33,840
- You're saying...
- The test came back positive.
706
00:28:33,842 --> 00:28:35,407
That's not possible.
707
00:28:35,409 --> 00:28:37,975
Oh, some of life's greatest
blessings aren't planned.
708
00:28:37,977 --> 00:28:39,019
What are my options?
709
00:28:39,021 --> 00:28:40,412
You can see the child to term
710
00:28:40,414 --> 00:28:42,370
and then choose to
either keep him or her,
711
00:28:42,372 --> 00:28:45,722
or you can give them up for adoption.
712
00:28:45,724 --> 00:28:48,159
And my third option?
713
00:28:48,161 --> 00:28:51,336
Oh, you mean murder?
714
00:28:51,338 --> 00:28:53,381
[LAUGHS]
715
00:28:53,383 --> 00:28:55,209
[PEACEFUL MUSIC]
716
00:28:55,211 --> 00:28:56,151
I'm sorry?
717
00:28:56,154 --> 00:28:59,082
You are going to have a
beautiful child of God,
718
00:28:59,085 --> 00:29:01,912
and hopefully he or
she looks just like you.
719
00:29:01,914 --> 00:29:05,393
- So beautiful.
- I'm not having it.
720
00:29:05,395 --> 00:29:08,875
I think it's wise that
you understand the facts.
721
00:29:08,877 --> 00:29:11,225
Cervical cancer spikes post-abortion.
722
00:29:11,227 --> 00:29:14,165
You have an 87% chance
of becoming sterile,
723
00:29:14,168 --> 00:29:17,404
and often, we are unable to
remove all the baby's limbs
724
00:29:17,407 --> 00:29:18,842
and digits from the womb.
725
00:29:18,844 --> 00:29:19,774
What?
726
00:29:19,777 --> 00:29:22,648
They kind of just float around...
727
00:29:22,651 --> 00:29:24,282
causing all sorts of medical issues,
728
00:29:24,284 --> 00:29:25,743
as you can imagine.
729
00:29:25,746 --> 00:29:28,111
What the hell kind of
women's health clinic is this?
730
00:29:28,114 --> 00:29:30,070
The kind that can save your soul.
731
00:29:30,072 --> 00:29:31,202
Okay.
732
00:29:31,204 --> 00:29:33,073
You have an 11-year-old daughter?
733
00:29:33,075 --> 00:29:34,901
How would she feel about
734
00:29:34,903 --> 00:29:36,903
you killing her little
brother or sister?
735
00:29:36,905 --> 00:29:39,558
Fuck you, Julie.
736
00:29:39,560 --> 00:29:42,561
[SINISTER MUSIC]
737
00:29:42,563 --> 00:29:46,478
♪
738
00:29:46,480 --> 00:29:48,959
[NO AUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
739
00:29:48,961 --> 00:29:56,011
♪
740
00:29:57,447 --> 00:30:00,886
[INTERMITTENT STATIC]
741
00:30:01,495 --> 00:30:08,545
♪
742
00:30:10,896 --> 00:30:13,853
[REVELATORY MUSIC]
743
00:30:13,855 --> 00:30:16,290
[SNORING SOFTLY]
744
00:30:16,292 --> 00:30:18,858
[PHONE VIBRATING]
745
00:30:18,860 --> 00:30:21,861
[DEVIOUS MUSIC]
746
00:30:21,863 --> 00:30:28,868
♪
747
00:30:28,870 --> 00:30:31,871
[CONTINUES SNORING SOFTLY]
748
00:30:31,873 --> 00:30:38,880
♪
749
00:30:39,576 --> 00:30:40,924
[DOOR OPENS]
750
00:30:40,926 --> 00:30:42,839
[MAN SCREAMING]
751
00:30:42,841 --> 00:30:45,493
Holy shit.
752
00:30:45,495 --> 00:30:48,107
[DOOR SLAMS]
753
00:30:50,936 --> 00:30:53,980
[SPLUTTERS] You need to work on your aim!
754
00:30:53,982 --> 00:30:55,590
- What?
- Smoothie!
755
00:30:55,592 --> 00:30:57,244
He's alive... one eye down,
756
00:30:57,246 --> 00:31:01,118
but still with the same
sparkling personality.
757
00:31:01,120 --> 00:31:03,990
What is... What is that?
758
00:31:03,992 --> 00:31:05,122
- Sax...
- You knew.
759
00:31:05,124 --> 00:31:07,872
- You knew?
- I saw him at Shine Tower.
760
00:31:07,875 --> 00:31:10,214
You know, when we were... I
don't think he realized it was me.
761
00:31:10,216 --> 00:31:11,389
I was gonna tell you...
762
00:31:11,391 --> 00:31:12,999
I'm gonna tear your head off right now.
763
00:31:13,001 --> 00:31:14,218
Yeah, tough guy? What's stopping you?
764
00:31:14,220 --> 00:31:16,106
"You were right" is what's stopping me.
765
00:31:16,109 --> 00:31:17,762
We should have gone
after this son of a bitch
766
00:31:17,764 --> 00:31:19,005
a long time ago.
767
00:31:19,007 --> 00:31:20,580
The Kap tape... You have to see this.
768
00:31:20,583 --> 00:31:22,182
Oh, this?
769
00:31:22,184 --> 00:31:23,662
Hell, Sax!
770
00:31:23,664 --> 00:31:26,230
We could flip him. We
can get him to testify.
771
00:31:26,232 --> 00:31:28,188
You get your revenge.
I get my badge back.
772
00:31:28,190 --> 00:31:31,148
Oh, shove your badge up your vadge.
773
00:31:31,150 --> 00:31:33,672
They're all in this together.
774
00:31:33,674 --> 00:31:35,674
I should have seen it.
775
00:31:35,676 --> 00:31:38,546
I take out Shine, and from
him, I get to Smoothie.
776
00:31:38,548 --> 00:31:41,375
If Le Dic can get me anywhere
near that sequined clown,
777
00:31:41,377 --> 00:31:43,508
then we take him out.
778
00:31:43,510 --> 00:31:46,206
We finish this... my way.
779
00:31:46,208 --> 00:31:47,381
I know what you're feeling right now...
780
00:31:47,383 --> 00:31:48,600
- Do you?
- But you have to take
781
00:31:48,602 --> 00:31:50,384
a step back and take a breath.
782
00:31:50,386 --> 00:31:51,559
You could be walking into a trap.
783
00:31:51,561 --> 00:31:53,474
Mer, you invited me into this pool.
784
00:31:53,476 --> 00:31:56,390
Well, here the fuck I
am, weenie bikini and all.
785
00:31:56,392 --> 00:31:59,002
Where are you? Not in that pool.
786
00:31:59,004 --> 00:32:00,699
The one thing I've learned
787
00:32:00,701 --> 00:32:03,049
is you can't underestimate Shine.
788
00:32:03,051 --> 00:32:06,531
[TENSE MUSIC]
789
00:32:06,533 --> 00:32:09,229
I've been out there, Mer.
790
00:32:09,231 --> 00:32:11,579
Driving a cab, taking my
little kid to school...
791
00:32:11,581 --> 00:32:14,278
Just living a normal life
792
00:32:14,280 --> 00:32:17,150
like any other average chump.
793
00:32:17,152 --> 00:32:18,559
I've been a sitting duck.
794
00:32:18,562 --> 00:32:22,199
He could have after
me anytime he wanted...
795
00:32:22,201 --> 00:32:25,028
[SIGHS] But he didn't.
796
00:32:25,030 --> 00:32:27,291
Now, maybe he thought
that I wasn't a threat.
797
00:32:27,293 --> 00:32:29,206
Maybe he thought that there's
no way I could touch him,
798
00:32:29,208 --> 00:32:33,036
so maybe, just maybe, Mer...
799
00:32:33,038 --> 00:32:35,429
♪
800
00:32:35,431 --> 00:32:39,129
Maybe he underestimated me.
801
00:32:39,131 --> 00:32:42,020
[MUFFLED BANG]
802
00:32:42,090 --> 00:32:44,134
[MUFFLED BANG]
803
00:32:44,136 --> 00:32:46,310
[MELLOW MUSIC]
804
00:32:46,312 --> 00:32:48,355
They make you look so grown up.
805
00:32:48,357 --> 00:32:50,270
Do they still hurt?
806
00:32:50,272 --> 00:32:52,142
Not as bad as I thought.
807
00:32:52,144 --> 00:32:55,275
Well, a little pain never hurt anyone.
808
00:32:55,277 --> 00:32:58,148
- I like them.
- My mom's gonna kill me.
809
00:32:58,150 --> 00:33:01,194
♪
810
00:33:01,196 --> 00:33:04,502
Parents always tell you that
you're too young for things,
811
00:33:04,504 --> 00:33:07,548
but no matter how desperately they try,
812
00:33:07,550 --> 00:33:11,465
they can't stop you from growing up.
813
00:33:11,467 --> 00:33:14,077
Where were you when I texted?
814
00:33:14,079 --> 00:33:16,383
I thought you knew everything.
815
00:33:16,385 --> 00:33:19,125
♪
816
00:33:19,127 --> 00:33:21,214
Dropped off again
817
00:33:21,216 --> 00:33:24,478
from relative to relative.
818
00:33:24,480 --> 00:33:26,654
Sometimes it feels
like no one wants you.
819
00:33:26,656 --> 00:33:28,221
I know how that is.
820
00:33:28,223 --> 00:33:30,049
You don't know anything about me.
821
00:33:30,051 --> 00:33:33,226
We have more in common
than you might think.
822
00:33:33,228 --> 00:33:36,664
♪
823
00:33:36,666 --> 00:33:38,275
[CHUCKLES] It wasn't long ago
824
00:33:38,277 --> 00:33:40,146
that you were one of those children.
825
00:33:40,148 --> 00:33:42,627
What was it? "Not one wish..."
826
00:33:42,629 --> 00:33:44,613
Not just two wishes!
827
00:33:44,616 --> 00:33:48,502
"But three wishes."
828
00:33:48,504 --> 00:33:50,809
They never came true, did they?
829
00:33:50,811 --> 00:33:54,291
Mine did. I wanted to meet my dad.
830
00:33:54,293 --> 00:33:57,381
That's so sweet. [CHUCKLES]
831
00:33:57,383 --> 00:33:59,513
But was he everything you wished for?
832
00:33:59,515 --> 00:34:04,083
♪
833
00:34:04,085 --> 00:34:06,825
I can never be like that anymore, can I?
834
00:34:06,827 --> 00:34:09,697
No, you can never be naive again.
835
00:34:09,699 --> 00:34:12,178
No longer a child, a victim,
836
00:34:12,180 --> 00:34:14,659
like a little lamb, eyes to the clouds,
837
00:34:14,661 --> 00:34:16,487
led singing to the slaughterhouse.
838
00:34:16,489 --> 00:34:18,402
You have seen so much.
839
00:34:18,404 --> 00:34:20,230
You could be little forever.
840
00:34:20,232 --> 00:34:23,320
Your perception has sharpened.
841
00:34:23,322 --> 00:34:26,192
You can see things they can't see.
842
00:34:26,194 --> 00:34:29,674
The truth behind the artifice.
843
00:34:29,676 --> 00:34:34,113
Now all you have to do is...
844
00:34:34,115 --> 00:34:35,723
look.
845
00:34:35,725 --> 00:34:38,726
[SINISTER MUSIC]
846
00:34:38,728 --> 00:34:45,168
♪
847
00:34:45,170 --> 00:34:46,473
[RADICAL ROCK MUSIC]
848
00:34:46,475 --> 00:34:51,478
[DRAWN-OUT] Why are you buzzing?
849
00:34:51,480 --> 00:34:55,569
[DRAWN-OUT] I don't know!
850
00:34:55,571 --> 00:34:57,745
♪
851
00:34:57,747 --> 00:35:00,879
[HORN VIBRATING]
852
00:35:00,881 --> 00:35:03,316
[HOLLERS]
853
00:35:03,318 --> 00:35:05,623
♪
854
00:35:05,625 --> 00:35:07,842
Phew.
855
00:35:07,844 --> 00:35:09,583
[PANTING]
856
00:35:09,585 --> 00:35:12,804
Well, it doesn't get
much weirder than that.
857
00:35:12,806 --> 00:35:15,200
[GOO SQUELCHING]
858
00:35:17,854 --> 00:35:23,248
♪ I'm always chasing rainbows ♪
859
00:35:23,251 --> 00:35:28,080
♪ Watching the clouds passing by ♪
860
00:35:28,082 --> 00:35:31,315
♪ My schemes are just like ♪
861
00:35:31,318 --> 00:35:34,173
♪ All my dreams ♪
862
00:35:34,175 --> 00:35:37,133
♪ Ending in the sky ♪
863
00:35:37,135 --> 00:35:39,876
♪ Some fellows ♪
864
00:35:41,922 --> 00:35:44,314
You know, it's happening tonight.
865
00:35:44,316 --> 00:35:46,664
[TENSE MUSIC]
866
00:35:46,666 --> 00:35:49,580
My smart, splendid lads,
867
00:35:49,582 --> 00:35:51,321
I think there's a very good chance
868
00:35:51,323 --> 00:35:54,367
that you'll both be
alive to see the sunny,
869
00:35:54,369 --> 00:35:56,935
sunny light of day.
870
00:35:56,937 --> 00:36:00,199
What the hell?
871
00:36:00,201 --> 00:36:02,201
[GRUNTS]
872
00:36:02,203 --> 00:36:04,986
[MUFFLED SHOUTING]
873
00:36:04,988 --> 00:36:07,250
[GROANS]
874
00:36:07,252 --> 00:36:09,817
[HOLLERING]
875
00:36:09,819 --> 00:36:12,603
[STAMMERING, HOLLERING] Let me out!
876
00:36:12,605 --> 00:36:14,866
[DRAMATIC MUSIC]
877
00:36:14,868 --> 00:36:17,260
[GRUNTS, HOLLERS]
878
00:36:17,262 --> 00:36:20,132
[GRUNTING] Pink!
879
00:36:20,134 --> 00:36:22,917
[ALARM WAILING]
880
00:36:22,919 --> 00:36:25,050
♪
881
00:36:25,052 --> 00:36:27,879
- [GRUNTS]
- [HOLLERS]
882
00:36:27,881 --> 00:36:34,886
♪
883
00:36:34,888 --> 00:36:38,368
[HOLLERS]
884
00:36:38,370 --> 00:36:41,109
I'm sorry.
885
00:36:41,111 --> 00:36:45,026
Pink, I'm scared.
886
00:36:45,028 --> 00:36:48,204
I love you.
887
00:36:48,206 --> 00:36:51,209
[BOTH HOLLERING]
888
00:36:55,735 --> 00:36:57,038
[MELLOW MUSIC]
889
00:36:57,040 --> 00:36:59,345
Wow, what was that?
890
00:36:59,347 --> 00:37:00,825
I dunno,
891
00:37:00,827 --> 00:37:03,306
but I'd order it again on a Sunday.
892
00:37:03,308 --> 00:37:09,921
♪
893
00:37:09,923 --> 00:37:11,227
What?
894
00:37:11,229 --> 00:37:13,968
Nothing, it's just...
895
00:37:13,970 --> 00:37:15,318
You're so pretty.
896
00:37:15,320 --> 00:37:18,669
[GIGGLES]
897
00:37:18,671 --> 00:37:20,975
Oh, no, no thanks. I don't smoke.
898
00:37:20,977 --> 00:37:23,282
But I do spoon.
899
00:37:23,284 --> 00:37:25,241
♪
900
00:37:25,243 --> 00:37:26,938
This is nice.
901
00:37:26,940 --> 00:37:28,853
Most guys just want to fork.
902
00:37:28,855 --> 00:37:31,334
You know, you can stay for a while...
903
00:37:31,336 --> 00:37:32,465
Like... like all night.
904
00:37:32,467 --> 00:37:34,160
I... I mean, if you want.
905
00:37:34,163 --> 00:37:36,076
You want me to stay all night?
906
00:37:36,079 --> 00:37:37,296
Sure!
907
00:37:37,298 --> 00:37:39,733
Oh, we... we could have
chocolate chip pancakes
908
00:37:39,735 --> 00:37:42,214
in the morning, like at a sleepover.
909
00:37:42,216 --> 00:37:45,304
Well, I do love pancakes.
910
00:37:45,306 --> 00:37:48,916
But won't your friend be
wondering where you are?
911
00:37:48,918 --> 00:37:50,962
Oh, who cares about him?
912
00:37:50,964 --> 00:37:54,400
He's probably somewhere dumb and boring.
913
00:37:54,402 --> 00:37:57,882
[YAWNING] Doing dumb...
914
00:37:57,884 --> 00:37:59,362
boring stuff.
915
00:37:59,364 --> 00:38:02,365
[HEAVY ELECTROPOP MUSIC]
916
00:38:02,367 --> 00:38:05,368
[MUFFLED MOANING]
917
00:38:05,370 --> 00:38:12,377
♪
918
00:38:42,798 --> 00:38:49,849
♪
919
00:39:00,076 --> 00:39:02,512
Amanda?
920
00:39:02,514 --> 00:39:04,949
Nick.
921
00:39:04,951 --> 00:39:08,610
♪
922
00:39:08,613 --> 00:39:14,602
- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
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