Original subtitles

Just hold still, Molly.

Sorry if I'm being dramatic.

Mmm. Yeah, I'm not feeling anything.

Really? 'Cause I thought I felt something.

You know, the chances are so small that it would be cancer at your age.

Don't worry.

Get some sleep. Are you drinking enough water?

The gloves down here are always too small.

Maybe your hands are too big. You know what that means.

Oh, my God. Are they flirting?

You're blushing.

It's like I'm not here. It's like I'm part of this table.

I'm so sick of being a patient.

Hold on.

Okay, Molly. I'm gonna put on some music.

♪ Leaning out the window ♪

♪ Touching stars ♪

I don't want music.

I don't want music!

♪ Got to live your life ♪

Stop. Stop the music!

Please, please don't move.

Stop!

Hi. Okay... Um...

Sorry, listen. Uh, w-what exactly, uh, is the issue wi-with the radiation?

I just... I wa... Is it okay if I just take a break just for a few days?

- I'm... I'm sorry. - We really...

No, no. Don't say sorry.

- I need a break. I need a break. - Sorry. Listen.

- Don't say you're sorry, Molly. Get angry. - Wait. Laura,

- I need you to help me out here. - What? I'm sorry.

Dr. P, it's Nikki.

- My name is Nikki. - Nikki.

Nikki. Of course, I'm sorry.

Thank you, Sonya, for piping up.

And, look... No, I know.

I-I understand. I-I get it.

What with the hip surgery, you have both had, huh, a rough time this month.

What did you say? A rough time?

- Well... - Okay.

I just want you to remember that pieces of her bone have been removed.

She's got a metal rod in her leg.

And now she has a tumor in her eye.

So I'm pretty sure you didn't just say, "A rough time,"

because if you did, then you're gonna have to go ahead

and kiss Laura's ass.

- Oh, fuck. - What...

- I'm sorry. - Um...

Well, I can't unsee that, can I?

No, obviously you can.

He's been an oncologist for 40 years.

They're talking about banning you from procedures.

- That makes sense. - Is she okay?

She looks so tired.

I think we're both losing it.

...losing control like that.

"Blindfold sex. Cuckolding. Tickle torture. Lactation fetish?"

I don't think I have that one.

- Okay. That sounds right. - No, no, no.

" Wall Street wolf by day, your little bitch by night."

- Huh, that's promising. - No, no. It's fine.

I won't grab my butt at any more doctors. Okay?

You have been so angry.

I... I'm great. I'm fine.

And I'm doing all this, and I'm smiling.

Well, it's a very weird smile.

- Is it? - Mm-hmm.

Molly.

Molly.

Radiation is gonna make you feel better in the long run.

- I don't think you should stop. - I don't wanna talk about being sick.

I joined a kinky dating app yesterday.

Do you think I'm a spanko painslut cuckquean?

Yes. Oh, yes.

I hear you.

You both need a break from the hospital.

- Okay. Come here. Come here. - What's this?

Shh. What're you doing tomorrow night?

And do you have any clothes that you would describe as pop princess

who is secretly fucking all the Spice Girls?

I, like, have been preparing for whatever this is for my entire life.

Do I look like I have cancer?

- No, you look like you have chlamydia. - Okay.

Really? That's what I was going for.

- Hi, hi, hi. - Hey.

You look perfect.

- Thank you. - Is that food?

Ah, it's lasagna. It's for the potluck.

This is a sex party potluck? This is a fuck potluck?

That's my ex. It's their party.

Whoa, there's some really interesting smells in here.

Like vagina and oregano.

Is that a butthole? No, it's a lamp.

- Sonya. - G.

And Sonya's friends. Let me take your coats.

- Welcome, welcome. - Hey.

Okay, well, obviously you guys signed the waiver,

so you understand the rules, right?

There's no touching without consent,

and if anyone makes you uncomfortable...

Oh, my God. This is too much.

I'm staying for ten minutes, and then I'm leaving.

Here are your drink tickets.

- I want that. Yeah. - Yeah. And, uh...

- Sorry, but we're out of ice. - It's 10:15.

- How are you already out of ice? - You wanna get ice?

- Get ice. A lot of people came. - You are so chaotic.

- They had ice. - Okay, okay, okay.

- I drink my shit neat. - All right.

So...

In this room, no phones.

Oh, my God.

We have dancing!

We have some cuddling happening.

Vulva studying. Shibari ropes.

Hey, Sasha. Are you getting tied tonight?

♪ You do, I know you do, baby ♪

♪ Bet, bet on that ♪

♪ You do, bet you do, S-Say you do ♪

♪ Bet, bet on that ♪

♪ You, you, you do ♪

Do you like that?

- You're mine now. - Yes.

Oh, yes.

You're incredible.

Touch yourself.

Yeah. Just like that.

Don't come until I say so.

Please.

Please.

Now.

Perfect.

What's going on for you right now?

You okay?

That's-That's what I want.

What did Sonya tell you about us?

Uh, nothing. Just that you dated and...

Uh, we didn't date. We fucked.

Dykes can be disgusting people.

It was profane. Almost sacrilegious.

God. I just... I just loved watching you at the party.

Tell me how to do what you do.

Why are you whispering?

You think this is something to be ashamed about?

No.

Look, topping's a sacred skill, okay?

All right? It's just learning what terrifies you,

and working with that until you come.

It's about facing down the shadow self that lives inside all of us, right?

Who are you inside?

What type of animal are you?

Yeah, I don't know.

I mean, I'm not a top. Or... Or...

I-I don't know what you call it. Like, a... Like a dominatrix.

It's-It's not about the terminology,

it's about the subconscious, right?

Don't even think.

What do you fantasize about? Tying someone up?

Total control? Anything.

I kicked my neighbor in the fucking dick.

Fuck, yeah. Fuck, yeah. Yes, you did.

See, that's hot. That's some shit.

See, now-now we're talking, right?

So you get off on having a certain type of power, right?

- Yes. - Hmm.

So the first step then is to put yourself in a more submissive role.

No, I wanna be in control.

Right, right.

Well, in order to be good at being in control,

you need to understand what it's like to submit sexually.

- So, look. I'd be willing to show you. - No.

You don't wanna submit to me?

No. I-I need to be in charge.

Submission scares you, I get it.

I was just looking for some pointers.

When you're ready to meet your shadow self, come back.

The whale's in my section again.

Thank you for-for your time.

- What? - Thank you.

Your sister wants to know why you quit the play.

- Oh, those jeans are so cute. - Thank you.

Why do you smell so bad?

Oh, my God.

- Ugh. - She went to a sex party last night.

No. It was a... It was a kink-forward play party potluck.

I need you to stay as far away from me as possible.

I'm too pregnant for that shit.

Okay, and I didn't quit the play.

I would not ever quit the play. I got fired.

Why? Because you're taking Molly to doctor's appointments?

Don't do that.

She's at the hospital every day. She's being amazing.

So what, you're just gonna let Molly ruin your entire life?

I'm sorry, but I'm concerned.

This is new for you. The taking care of someone.

Can you just shut up? Like, just stop fucking talking.

Hey, Nikki. You okay?

I'm sorry.

Sorry.

So my buddy started calling me Hoops as a goof,

because I sucked at basketball.

And then they started calling me Hooper.

How do we start talking about it? I don't know.

- I think I'm the one that has to initiate. - Actually, I changed it legally.

So when did you figure out that you liked orgasm torture?

Uh, probably when I was canvassing for Obama. Like '06.

Oh.

So do you wanna go over boundaries?

Oh, right. Yes. Um...

No bruises. I work in finance.

But I do want you to step on me.

And I'm into penis humiliation.

- Is that when I yell at your penis? - Mm-hmm.

Yeah, I want you to talk about how small and sad my penis is.

And are-are you into cock cages?

Excuse me. Sorry. Is it possible to get some whole milk with this, please?

- Sure. - Like, the good stuff from a cow.

Let's go to the World Wide Web.

Oh.

Oh. Yeah, I can do that.

Yay.

What about you? What're your limits?

Oh. Um...

I keep my underwear on.

I don't talk about my personal life.

No penetrative sex.

And you don't come unless I say so.

Totally cool. I can respect a hard limit.

I like your, uh, cane.

Oh, shit. The cane.

Is that part of the kink?

Oh, yeah.

It's my thing.

Can he tell the belt is actually a back brace?

Stop it. You have all the power. You're in control.

He shouldn't be standing in front of you. He should be kneeling.

Kneel down.

Where everyone could see you, you dirty little boy.

- Can I smell you please? - Yes.

No, your neighbor saw you? Did you talk to him?

No, I couldn't, 'cause I was in the middle of getting smelled.

- Oh, but of course. - Besides,

he doesn't even look at me anymore.

So... So I had cock cage guy walk on his knees into my apartment.

And then I tried to insult his penis, but when I took off his clothes...

Oh, my God. I'm so scared.

What was it? Was it awful?

It was beautiful.

Like, this was the most beautiful dick I have ever seen.

You hate it, don't you?

It was like finding a beautiful secret waterfall made of penis.

Yeah.

It was like a penis waterfall.

Is it the worst one you've ever seen?

What a terrible dick.

What a stupid, stupid penis.

Now stand up.

It goes through the... Yeah, that goes...

Just thread that through the... The little metal part.

It's-It's like a bike lock.

You're doing great.

I'll just... Here. I'll get it.

- Okay. - Yeah. It's... This is tough.

This part is actually the hardest part.

It's just, like... Kinda tying a shoe.

- Just over the loop, and... boop. - Okay, got it.

And once it's on, just clip that.

Okay. Sorry.

- I practiced. I just... - It's okay. That's okay. That's okay.

So then what're you supposed to do?

You put it in the thing. In the... Did you cage it?

No. I mean, I couldn't do it. It was too big.

- Shut up. - Yes.

I had to, like, cram it in

like I was balling up a sweat sock.

You did it. You just go for it.

He's coming back tomorrow so that I can step on him.

Oh, my God.

Yeah. Hold on.

But, well, let me just figure it out, 'cause I gotta check my schedule.

That's him.

Well, let me just see. Hold on a second.

That's my old doctor.

Oh, have you been coming here a lot?

Yes.

I... No. I-I don't know.

I just like to watch him.

Well, either's good.

Come on.

How... How do you not just, like, wanna fucking kill this guy?

Look at this fucking asshole.

That's...

This is fucking bullshit right here.

He couldn't be bothered to order a mammogram, and now you're dying,

and he's like, "Oh, I'll just do, like, normal fucking shit right now."

Just normal fucking life for this fucking asshole.

Stop, stop. I don't want him to see me.

When did we both get so angry?

Are you okay?

Yeah, I am fine.

Well, actually, whatever. I didn't really know how to tell you this,

but I got fired from the play a month ago.

No.

Actually, I quit. Or it was a quit-fire situation.

It's not a big deal.

I missed a bunch of rehearsals, which is whatever,

but I didn't wanna tell you because I did not want you to think

that it was, like, because of you,

or it happened because I'm taking care of you.

- It is. It is because of me. - No, it's not.

Wait, but then why have we been running your lines together?

That's a good question. I actually don't know.

I guess I just like reading Shakespeare to you.

Okay. That's hilarious.

Okay, that's great. Well, yeah. Well, you better.

Hmm.

I'm gonna cover your face.

You're weak. You're pathetic.

- I hate you. I hate you. - Red.

I hate you.

Red. Red.

- I hate you! - Red!

What?

What?

Sorry, why did you say... Why did you call the safe word?

You were great. You were great.

It's just, uh...

It-It kinda felt like you were thinking about something else there.

And you gotta be careful.

Like, top drop is really scary.

Let's get some... Let's get some snacks, and...

Uh...

Zesty jalapeño chips?

Shit.

I would like to...

I am here to submit sexually to you.

- Jesus. - What?

You said not to whisper or to be ashamed.

Okay, but can you keep it chill a little bit?

Come on.

I'm going on break. Nobody touch my napkins.

You're right. I'm scared.

I'm scared...

I'm scared of not being in control.

I'm scared of not being able to feel or move.

I'm scared of losing my body.

Something happened to you, right?

Yeah.

I get it.

Look, vanilla sex...

you can disappear, right?

You can fake it. Who cares?

This shit, you can't disappear. Especially if you're in control.

Right? That's like driving a car and taking your hands off the wheel.

It's fucking dangerous, right?

You need to just learn to stay present.

Stay right here.

Can you show me?

Do you want to submit to me?

Yes.

Good.

Remember, you have the power to stop this at any time.

I wanna touch you now.

Is that okay?

Yes.

Anyone could walk in here at any second and just see us and...

Shh.

Quiet.

Just be here.

Just breathe.

Do you like that? Do you want more?

Yes.

What do you want me to do next?

Don't go anywhere. Stay right here.

Stay right here.

I want...

you to tie my hands together, but I don't want them over my head.

Good. Good.

Was that too much?

No.

Okay, I wanna stop now.

Okay.

Good.

That was beautiful.

You're so powerful.

Okay, so, uh, you've

I want you to sit next to me.

Oh, I'm sorry, I have a very busy...

Sit.

I'm going to hold your hand now, okay?

Okay.

I'd like to know your first name.

Oh.

It's Jerry.

- Jerry, hi. - Hi.

Where are you from, Jerry?

Ooh. Well, um, just outside Toledo.

Um, near the zoo.

Jerry, going forward,

I need you to walk me through ahead of time, step by step,

what will happen during a procedure.

I need you to answer all my questions, and Nikki's.

I need you to listen to me when I say what I feel,

and hear me when I say I need a break.

Now breathe with me.

Breathe with you? That's...

That's not... That's not my cup of tea.

- I don't... I don't think I can... - You can do it, Jerry.

Okay. You can go now.

We're gonna figure out a way to not be so angry.

I forgive you!

Look at me!

Yeah! Fuck you!

I forgive you. I forgive you!

Yeah! Me! I forgive you!

I forgive you!

I forgive you.

♪ I would like something special ♪

♪ I would like to hold it, Touch it, it be real ♪

♪ Something cool and bendable ♪

Hey. Um...

Molly told me how you helped her, and I wanted to say thank you.

Why don't you come inside, take off all your clothes,

and put on the movie Minions?

Yes, my king.

♪ Can it watch out And tell me when I'm crazy ♪

This fucking guy.

♪ ...could be vulnerable ♪

♪ I would like that too ♪

I don't know if you're embarrassed about what happened

or if you think about it at all,

but we're gonna keep bumping into each other, so get over it and look at me.

♪ Something cool and bendable ♪

I think about it all the time.

♪ I would like Something special ♪

I said look at me.

♪ I want something cool And bendable ♪

♪ I would like Something unusual ♪

♪ I would like it To know how to party ♪

♪ Something unflappable ♪

♪ Can it have moves And platform shoes ♪

♪ And know how to dance ♪

♪ I would like Something special ♪

♪ I want something cool And bendable ♪

♪ I would like Something special ♪

♪ I want something cool And bendable ♪