Original subtitles

I did it.

I left Steve.

Fuck. Fuck. Where do I live?

By getting divorced, am I just single?

Like, right now, am I a single person with stage-four cancer?

Why would I do that? Why would anyone do that? Fuck.

I'm just gonna head to my place, and then we'll figure it out from there.

What's the plan?

I just wanna be touched by someone who wants to touch me.

Is that crazy?

No. No, that is not crazy.

- Okay. - Yeah.

Fuck.

Okay.

- This is gonna be amazing. - Yeah.

- Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. - Okay.

Yeah, this is good.

I have nothing with.

- I can do this. - Mm-hmm.

Why did I wear overalls this morning?

What kind of man wants to fuck a woman with cancer who also wears overalls?

Okay.

Ignore that I'm crying.

This is This is This is good.

Okay.

You got it.

The air smells different.

Is this a sign?

Is this a sign from the universe?

Yes! Yes to everything you were just acting out!

God, he's putting so much effort into that.

Thank you.

About me.

I like music and the ocean?

No.

I'm a dirty, dirty slut who likes windsurfing and pottery

and giving weird sad blow jobs.

No.

I'm 40, homeless, married, can't feel my breasts, and I like trees?

Oh, my God.

- Hi. - Hi.

Hi.

Okay. We know Nikki's not gonna be able to take care of you, right?

I think she has emotional problems.

No, she doesn't.

She's just loud.

Like, some undiagnosed form of adult ADHD.

She's never been in a relationship for more than a year.

How do you know she's not gonna bail when it gets hard?

Look, I know you guys have a thing.

Whatever that is, I understand the power of female friendship.

I do. I know every word to Beaches.

You used to jerk off to Beaches.

Ha ha. No, I didn't.

Look

The only reason she likes you is because you never call her out on anything.

You know it, and I know it.

You're always just there whenever she needs you.

That's That's what this situation is. Okay? I said it.

What is that? Is that...

That's a chode!

Hello?

I joined a dating app.

You're You're immunocompromised.

You can't do that. You can't just go and have s...

You're gonna have sex with strangers?

This is what you do. You You run away. You disappear.

It's like I don't even know who the fuck you are sometimes.

And, like, Nikki's not gonna be able to take care of you.

She can't handle it, okay? I said it. I said it.

She can't handle what's coming.

She's like She's a child.

She just makes noises. That's all she does.

Bad. Come, wait upon him. Lead him to my bower.

The moon, methinks, methinks,

methinks

- "Looks with a watery eye." - No I got it. I got it.

The moon, methinks, methinks, looks with a watery eye.

And when she weeps, weeps every little

- Fuck me! - Yeah, no, no. You got it.

"Every little" fuck me.

Did they forget about us?

Oh, no, this is what it's like.

You wait a half an hour to get called, then you wait again in the room.

Like, 80% of having cancer is waiting.

Is this gonna make you late for rehearsal?

Mm-mmm. No, it's fine. I'll make it.

Okay, I don't want this to mess up your life.

I want you to have time for Noah and the play, and...

Yes. I will. It's not like I'm solving world hunger.

I'm still living off the residuals from a TV show

where I played Benjamin Franklin's whore.

You were so great in that.

Thank you.

God, this is so exciting. Look at how many pictures of penises I'm getting.

Wow.

What a fantastic penis.

It's like a sunflower just bending

- towards the sun. - Yeah, I know. It's, like, hopeful.

Mmm.

So, as we discussed,

you have bone metastasis in your pelvic region.

I can't - Treatment

- I can't do this again. - to slow the spread of the cancer

- and relieve any symptoms. - What if I get up, walk out, die in a hole

- without doctors or medicine or - But the main goal is to fight this

- for as long as we can. - I could die like a bear.

I'm going to deploy all the weapons in my arsenal.

- How do bears die? In caves? - Okay. So, uh

There caves in New York?

My mission is to extend your life as long as possible.

Now, the...

Steve takes notes.

Oh, yeah. For sure. Got it.

No. Not the bag.

The bag is so bad. The bag makes me so afraid.

I - Um

Oh, my gosh.

Are we getting close?

Close to computer.

Okay, I have the 'Kay.

Are there two separate crumb cakes in there?

- That's what they appear to be. - It's a long story.

Uh, now, uh, first, we're going to do some follow-up diagnostics

to, uh, assess the biochemical and hormonal activity.

You'll need to schedule a, uh, full-body scan ASAP.

- I'm so sorry. Sorry. - What?

I'm gonna interrupt and ask a lot of questions,

'cause that's how my ADHD presents itself.

Not that I I don't know if I actually have ADHD,

but I'm pretty sure I do.

Um, would you mind just going a bit slower and then I can probably take,

- like, "Steve notes," and - Yeah.

The biopsy showed hormone-positive cancer,

so we're going to, uh, begin monthly shots of leuprolide to lower estrogen production

and, uh, get you into menopause.

- Menopause? - Menopause.

- Right. - What?

Sorry. That's funny.

'Cause I just thought that the one benefit of dying young

was that I wouldn't have to go through menopause.

So, uh, you can you can expect symptoms.

Um, hot flashes, mood swings, insomnia,

uh, muscle pains, uh, decreased libido.

Oh, wait, no. Sorry.

That's not gonna work with Molly's goals.

It's okay, it's okay.

- Don't think about this. - What else do you have?

- Think about dicks. - What do I have?

There's so many dicks pouring into your inbox right now.

- That is the first line of treatment. - Yes. Dicks.

- Let me see if I can explain. - Dicks.

- Imagine you're playing a round of golf. - Big dicks, little dicks

Lines of treatments are like golf clubs.

Round dicks, smooth dicks, funny dicks.

So, hormone therapy, that would be like my driver.

It's not a lofted club, but it's... What?

Oh, no, no. So sorry. Thank you so much.

We don't understand golf metaphors at all.

- It's just not gonna happen. - Dicks.

- Oh. - Can you explain what you are saying?

- Ooh, that's a cool one. - Yes, uh, I can.

- Yeah. - Thank you.

So, like, a nine iron. Now, that that is a lofted club...

Oh, my God. No, not the golf.

- I don't want you to explain golf. - Just ask. Ask the question.

When am I going to die?

The research is changing every day,

and every case is different.

But the five-year survival rate is around 30%.

So not immediately, but soon.

I can't cure you, but I can give you time.

So get that scan and let's get you into menopause, huh?

Okay. Right.

So, for the scan today, -

- I don't have time for this. - we need to send Molly's records over.

But you can't do that because a hospital in the great city of New York

cannot communicate with its patients unless it's through...

An app called MyChart.

The main things you need are ID, insurance card, any CDs...

Any CDs like, actual 1998? We're talking CDs?

Yes. Um, I'm gonna go get them from Steve.

Okay. I'm coming with you.

- No. You have rehearsal. - Oh, my God. I have rehearsal.

- I'll just be a little bit late. - No, um, I got it. I got it. I got it.

I'm in. Calling. It's I'm fine.

- Okay. - I got it. I'm good.

- Really. Go. - Okay. All right. Okay.

So, I'll just see you at the scan.

- Yeah. - Amazing. We're doing it.

- Oh. Have some cake. - Oh, my God.

- It's loose and unwrapped. - Whoo!

- I love you. - I love you. I love you. Okay.

Okay. I'm just gonna call Steve.

Molly, your friend, uh, left her laptop.

- Thank you. Uh - Mm-hmm.

So, is Steve just gone?

Oh Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Okay.

I don't have time.

Do you want to meet in person and do it with me?

No.

Come and get this ass, boy.

So,

on this card, I think I have some points.

Um. Yeah, I'm not I'm not exactly sure how long I'm staying.

Uh, yes. I'd like your finest suite to do some hard-core sex

with a guy named Jason R. Who just messaged me back.

Nope.

Oh, no. Is he real?

Is my cancer making me hallucinate male models in elevators?

God, you smell.

Have you been working out?

Look at those AirPods so tight in your ears.

Oh, I wish I was an AirPod in your ear.

Talk to him. Talk to him. You're gonna be dead in less than five years.

It doesn't matter. Nothing matters. Talk to him.

Hey.

- Yeah. That's good. - Sorry?

Do you wanna come up to my room?

Why?

Oh.

Yeah. Cool.

Cool. Yeah. What the fuck?

He's gonna see your mastectomy scars.

Gonna have to hear about his childhood.

Are you gonna get his email address?

Are you guys gonna stay in touch?

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I changed my mind.

Have a great rest of your day.

I like your overalls.

Where's Peaseblossom?

- Ready. - Oh.

No. No. You You enter like a waterfall.

- I don't know. - What does that mean?

- You can't do anything... - Waterfall.

- I know that. - Oh, you know?

I'm just I'm at work, Steve. She was supposed to call you.

Well, she didn't. And you don't know where she is. So, you lost her.

I didn't lose her. I'm meeting up with her after my rehearsal.

We're gonna go get a scan.

I know. Uh, uh, I get push notifications from from MyChart.

Did Did you set up your push notifications?

No, Steve. I haven't had a chance to do that

in the half a day that I've been dealing with this.

Okay. Look, the folder and the drive,

they have a username and password for the portal,

- Oh. - uh, social security, uh, infor... Hold on.

Uh, this is super important.

This CD has all of her medical records, okay?

- Okay. - It's got PDFs from four years

- of breast cancer treatment, okay? - Okay.

Can I get the MyChart info?

- You gave me the portal info. - MyChart is the portal!

- Jesus! - Okay.

No, not okay.

It's not okay because you have no idea

what it means to take care of somebody with cancer,

and you're the least organized person I've ever met.

- Okay. - Here's the deal.

You can be the fun friend, but if you're gonna be a caretaker,

you're gonna have to be there all the time, okay?

You're gonna have to manage everything,

and you're gonna have to watch her in pain.

Uh

He He wants to see you stroke my snout.

- Okay. - Wow.

Cool. Go do that. No. Go stroke his fucking snout.

Do you really think you're the person to take care of her?

Nikki. Donkey time.

Okay. I know that you're in pain right now, Steve.

I am too. I am.

- Okay. - So, here

Thank you. Sorry.

Okay. So I come up to him and,

"sleep thou, and I will wind thee in my arms."

Um, why do I have a charge for $1,000 on my card for a hotel in midtown?

This is my place of work.

And 200 for some kind of sexual toy store.

What the fuck is going on?

Well, this is the biggest vibrator I've ever use.

No.

What?

No.

Okay.

Oh.

Ma'am, you did very well.

Actually, you were incredible.

I've never seen driving like that.

- Annie. - What?

- It's my name. Annie. - Call her Annie.

- Annie. - Yeah, call her fucking Annie.

As opposed to ma'am.

Okay.

One more time.

You can do it!

Talk about your tits. They hug?

No. They're nice.

I wouldn't call them huge, but they're great.

And what did your mom say when you brought up the nursing home?

She changed the subject.

- She always changes the subjec. - Mmm.

I like talking to you.

Aw, I like talking to you.

Can I see your pussy?

No, I don't think so.

Okay. Uh, thanks for watching.

Uh, don't forget to subscribe to my YouTube channel.

Okay, I will. Thank you.

What the fuck?

She's on her way. Just please hold the appointment.

Oh, come on, Carla. I can tell you're starting to like me

by the way that you're avoiding eye contact.

To schedule the next available, I need an insurance card and records.

Okay. Let's do that.

What? No.

Uh, I had the CD with the

with the thing. With the records.

It's here

Fuck it.

- Molly. - Nikki.

I've been trying to call you.

Nikki, I clicked a bad link on your laptop.

Oh, my God. I don't have my laptop!

No, I I know, I have it.

It's been hacked by some kind of a porn man.

I don't know who he is, but someone has a video of me masturbating.

- Pick that up. - Sorry.

Um, is it a video that's, like, clearly you?

Or will people think that that's me?

How is that your first question? Nikki, help me! Help me!

I'm sorry! I'm 'Kay. Yes, I'm coming. I'm hanging up.

Clean that up.

I'm not gonna leave all of my things on the floor.

Deeply humiliating.

To just observe me as I

exist in my own personal hell.

- Where are you? - Don't walk in front of the computer.

I don't know if the camera is on.

- Oh, my God. - The screen just froze, and then

and then that window popped up and said they have a video of me.

What's going on here, buddy?

- Well, I got a vibrator delivered. - Let me see it.

Well, it's it's resting right now in the ice bucket. It overheated.

What?

What the fuck did you do to that thing?

I didn't call Steve.

I panicked, and I I came to this hotel, and then I got a room,

and then I tried to meet a guy, but but I got scared, so-so

so I just I masturbated all day.

No, that's good. That's good. That's good. Masturbation is important.

What if I just

Steve thinks I'm just, like, running away into some kind of a fantasy.

No. No, you're doing everything you need to do.

Uh, speaking of, I saw Steve.

Um, I got your records from him,

and now they're not in my bag.

- You lost my records? - Well, they were in my bag. I'm just...

Your bag is a black hole. I've always hated your bag.

You need to clean your bag. You need to organize your bag.

Okay.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I don't know how to do this.

I'm not, like, a pro at taking care of people.

I'm bad at taking care of people.

Not your fault. It's too much to ask.

- Yes, it is. - I'm calling Steve.

Don't do that. Don't call Steve. No, don't do that. I can do this.

Don't go and hide and be safe with Steve.

He does not care about what you want or who you are.

And that's why you married him.

And it was chickenshit then, and it's chickenshit now.

Shit. The screen.

It's growing.

Oh. Look at you. Look at you. You are so beautiful.

- Oh, my God. - No. What?

- Oh, my God! Can I use your credit card? - Oh, no, no. Me?

Please. Steve will get a bank alert on our joint account.

I don't I don't have that.

We want to help you.

I mean it's not like a chat, right?

Oh, my God.

Sir, we want to be cooperative.

We're just trying to figure out where the funds might come from at this point.

Coming back was the right decision.

No, I'm not back. I...

I I fixed everything.

I paid the ransom to the man.

I don't know how much it was 'cause it was in Bahamian dollars,

but that's okay.

I want you to have everything you want.

And if what you want is to masturbate with men online

I'm okay with that.

Why?

Because I think this is all some part of your healing process

around your your your core wound.

I'm sorry, can we please close this?

I can't keep looking at this photo of you.

Why not? Why can't you look at it?

It's disgusting. I don't wanna see you like that.

I Like I said,

I'm open to you exploring your urges.

I just As long as this doesn't happen again.

- I shouldn't have called you. - What?

I'm not gonna call you again.

Come on. Just Is it 'cause I said "disgusting"?

We don't need to get divorced.

I don't want anything from you.

I don't want any money.

I'm gonna liquidate my 401. I had that before we met.

And

And now we know I'm not gonna get old, so

Jesus.

Go. Go.

Oh, God.

Hey. Don't

Don't do this.

The only thing that I ask is if I can stay on your insurance, okay?

Yeah. Yeah, of course. Of course.

Molly, I'm tryna protect you.

I'm sorry I said that. I just I'm trying to keep you safe. Okay?

That was stupid. I shouldn't have said it.

Do you think we even know each other?

Yeah, I do.

I think we do.

Look what I found.

It was stuck inside my leaf face.

Of course it was in your leaf face.

I'm sorry.

Can we just get drunk? Because it's my last night before menopause.

What's all that?

This? I moved out. This is my lamp now. I did it.

Oh, my God. Oh, this is all your stuff!

Okay.

All day I've been thinking about this one thing,

which is that my Aunt Pearl told me

that she had the best sex of her life during menopause.

It's like they make you think that's not gonna happen,

but in fact, she, like, really focused up about it and she kind of, like, dedicated

It was, like, in her schedule. I remember this.

It cut into her hours at the community center. She didn't give a shit.

What are you What are you What is this?

Can I look where you're looking?

Is that for me, or is he trying to get a drink?

I think that's for you.

Do you think he can tell I've come six times already today?

Oh.

Who's gonna make it number seven?

Nice lamp.

Hell yes. I'm gonna empty my voicemail box,

which actually is something that I have to

I've been meaning to do it. I love you. My phone will be on.

I probably shouldn't have brought this lamp with me.

I want him. I want him to rub that beard on my face.

I want him.

Oh, God. I want him right now. I can't wait anymore.

I can't wait. I

Do you wanna kiss me?

Yeah, very much.

Did I You okay?

No, it's great. Keep going.

- Okay. - Okay.

- I love your boobs. - Thanks.

- Jesus. Fuck. - Okay. Hold on. Hold on.

- Shit. Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. - Oh. What?

Shit. Shit, shit, shit.

- I'm gonna come. - Oh.

Not in my car. Not in my car!

- What the fuck? - I barely touched you.

Oh.

Come on, dude.

Hey, I got you.

I'm sorry. Oh.

I'm coming!

Oh! Sorry.

- I'm sorry. I'm sorry. - It's okay. It's okay.

- It's okay. - That felt so good.

- Get the fuck out of my car. - I don't think he can.

- I'm sorry. - Get out of my car! Get out of my car!

Get out of my car!

Your side. Your side.

- Are you okay? - Ah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

I'm sorry. Thank you. I'm sorry.

- Oh, shit. My hat. My hat. - Your hat. Your hat.

Her hat.

- Don't forget the hat. Yeah, yeah. - Are you okay?

- - Hold on. - It's too tender. Don't.

It's too much right now.

- I'm sorry. - No, don't be sorry. It's fine.

- Sorry. I'm sorry. - No, no, no

♪ Upside mine ♪

♪ Upside mine ♪

♪ When you touch my body With your fingertips ♪

♪ Touch my body Till I don't exist ♪

♪ Touch my body Till it really fits ♪

♪ Touch my body Please, please, do it ♪

♪ Upside mine ♪

♪ Upside mine ♪

♪ Upside mine ♪

♪ Upside mine ♪

♪ When you move your body Up next to mine ♪

♪ Move your body up And give a sign ♪

♪ Move your body up And turn it around ♪

♪ Move your body up And slide it down ♪

♪ Upside mine ♪