Original subtitles

[music]

Hey, C.J., you know what, though?

Man, I'm so proud of you.

What you mean, Unc?

Just the way you managing everything

with Janine and the kids.

You know, these days, people have a little trouble,

they wanna go end it all.

Now, it hasn't been easy, man,

but, you know, when I look at my family,

it was all worth it.

And you know I ain't for that counseling mess.

It just ain't who I am.

Ain't nobody gonna tell me how to be me.

Yeah, I don't need no referee in my marriage either, man.

I don't think it's a bad thing.

Besides, Pops, you probably need some counseling.

It probably would've helped me and Miranda.

Oh, Calvin, please.

Couldn't nothing save you and Miranda.

If you say so, Pops,

but I know that's why me and Laura went ahead

and did the marriage counseling thing

before we get married.

We've had some tough realizations,

but I think it makes us better.

Yeah, I mean, to each his own, you know,

but I just know that marriage counseling,

for me, it would've just been another bill.

Me and Janine, we good.

If she want me to go, I'll go,

but, you know, I mean, we could talk at home for free.

Ha, that part.

Okay, C.J. and I are good.

Work is stressful,

but I find the bigger stress

to be trying to find the balance between work life and home.

Janine. Janine, Janine, Janine. Marriage is tough.

[Janine] I know.

But you guys have made it thus far, baby.

C.J. and I have been through our share of ups and downs.

You ain't never lied.

I remember them arguments y'all used to have. Whoo!

Like any other married couple.

Okay, I just, I just sometimes wish

men would be more open to marriage counseling, like...

Momma, you know Daddy ain't going to no counseling.

Mm-mm, mm-mm, he just wasn't raised like that, Janine.

I wish I had an opportunity to do all of that with Curtis

before we tied the knot.

But, honey, I can tell you one thing.

What?

Leaning on the power of God has led us together

all these years.

I know that's right.

Thank you, Jesus. Amen to that.

-[Ella] Mm-hmm. -What?

What do you mean what?

What do you know about being married?

Have you been married before?

I don't know anything about it firsthand,

but I do know that all things are possible

-with God on your side. -Ah.

Plus, all these books I been reading

in my philosophy class,

I know the basics on the subject.

You know, I know a little something, something.

Okay, I see you, Jazzy.

-No, no, no. No, no, no. -All grown up and stuff.

Allow me to reintroduce her as Ella Junior.

-Period. -Point blank.

Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you.

-Oh, wow. -It's a pleasure.

[knocking on door]

Who the hell is that at the door?

-Y'all invite somebody? -No.

You expecting somebody?

Am I ever?

Hell, I don't expect y'all. Y'all pop up.

I keep telling y'all don't do that.

One day you gonna do it

and you gonna see something you don't wanna see.

Egh. Gross, Pop.

Yeah, whatever, get the door, son.

You see I'm busy?

Hey, what's up, fam?

-Hey. -Yeah, yeah, yeah.

-What's up? -Peanut.

What the hell are you doing here?

Yeah, what are you doing here?

Dang, that's how y'all do me? No love for extended family?

No. Now go back where you came from.

So what's up, Peanut?

Man, I'm just, you know,

here to share an announcement with y'all.

Uh, y'all looking at a newly engaged man.

[music]

[fire hydrant hissing]

[bird tweeting]

[plane humming]

[car alarm blaring]

[police sirens wailing]

[train horn blowing]

[ambulance siren wailing]

[helicopter revving]

[firework firing]

Who is crazy enough to get engaged to you, Peanut?

Engaged? What?

Peanut, you're engaged?

Yeah. Yes, ma'am, yes, ma'am.

-Oh, congratulations, baby. -Thank you.

Well, I say, look at you!

Look how happy he is, Curtis.

So how'd you meet her?

Um, you know, it was on one

of them online, you know, dating sites.

Oh, Jesus.

It's a new day, Ella. It's a new day.

Whatever happened to the people

meeting at school or a church?

Or a coffee shop even?

I get kicked out of most of them places, so...

I'm so sick of this tomfoolery.

Let me get out of here.

Baby, I gotta go check the inventory

before Floyd calls, be bugging me about it.

Hey, I wasn't, you know, I ain't mean to interrupt anything.

I really just came to holler at Calvin for a sec.

Yeah, okay, well, next time, can you holler somewhere else?

Curtis.

Baby, you see everybody in the house?

The house is full.

The kitchen, everywhere. They're everywhere.

Congratulations, Peanut, again and again.

Hey, baby, I gotta make a run. Gotta make a run.

-Uh, Janine! -[Janine] Yes, ma'am.

-I'm gonna talk with you later. -Yes, ma'am.

[Ella] Love you. Love you, Jazzy, love you.

-Bye, Momma. -C.J., you know I love you.

-Bye, everybody. -Hey, baby.

Oh, snap. I forgot. Okay.

I'm on the way. Yo, Peanut.

Just come by the house later. I gotta go meet up with Laura.

All right, bet. See you later.

[Jazmine clears throat]

So how about those Falcons?

Okay, y'all mad at each other, huh?

I can always tell when y'all mad at each other.

It's so obvious.

I'm not mad. I'm not mad. Wishful.

I wish your father would've remembered our date night.

Took some time for it.

I was playing basketball one night last week.

Next week, [pops lips] date night.

Where you gonna take me? The gym?

You wanna go to gym?

Do I want to go to the gym?

No, no, you said gym.

Are you suggesting that I need to go to the gym?

I'm not suggesting anything.

You said, do I wanna take you to the gym?

Daddy, just stop while you ahead.

So now I'm fat?

Who said you is fat?

You didn't not say I was fat.

So what's up? Why you wanna take me to the gym?

I mean, you did suggest the gym.

Jazzy.

I'ma get out of here.

Okay, now that's a good idea.

-Yeah. And, uh... -Going to the gym?

No, no. [Janine clears throat] We going to dinner.

Oh. Five star restaurant.

-Ten stars. -[Janine] Ten.

-Do they have 10 stars? -[Janine] Mm.

Jesus.

Peanut, I still can't believe you went off and got engaged.

Nobody can believe he got engaged

and that is exactly why we're here.

So, Peanut, why don't you tell us

about this little chick of yours

and what's the name of this dating app again?

First of all, this ain't no little chick.

This is my fiancee, so put some respect on it

when you talking about her.

And the app is called Love at First Tap

and it's for singles who want the experts

to make them a perfect match based off their profile.

Okay, so how long has this been going on?

Mm, few weeks, maybe about a month.

And how's it going?

Amazing, man.

Like, we really getting to know each other.

And you're absolutely sure that this is the woman

you wanna spend the rest of your life with.

Hell, yeah, she the one.

She got a fat ass.

Okay, so when do we get to meet the one?

Yeah. If she got a fat ass, I wanna see.

Uh, look, [stammering] oh, yeah.

You gonna meet her. It'll be soon. It'll be soon.

Why you over here, stuttering, Peanut?

-You all right, dawg? -Oh, we good.

Yeah, Peanut, you acting like we stupid or something.

Man, no, man.

All right, look, man, the truth is

me and shorty ain't actually met yet.

And y'all engaged?

Yeah, that's how the app work.

If you tap right and she tap right,

then y'all engaged,

and you got 24 hours to confirm and respond.

Oh, I'm weak. I'm dead. I'm dead.

Peanut, listen, oh, what is you talking about?

You have to meet this girl

before you decide to walk down the aisle with her.

Sooner than later, like, for real, for real.

Okay, wait, wait, let me get this straight.

So you double-tapped on this chick

and the only communication you had is online?

Why haven't you met your fiancee yet?

Well, see, that's what I wanted to holler at you about.

Because, you know, um, I think it's about time I meet her

and I'm ready to meet her.

Yeah, you absolutely should.

But, wait, wait, wait, what does that have to do with me?

Well, you know, I kind of told her

that I'm a CEO of a marketing firm

and I live in a nice condo

and I travel the world and I go to fine dining experiences.

Now, why the hell would you tell her

something so stupid like that, P?

I don't know. It's what I put in the profile.

That's how you gotta get them nowadays, man.

They're not going to Cheesecake Warehouse.

You ain't got no money, they be acting funny.

No, it's not.

Starting off an engagement with a lie.

That's a recipe for disaster, bro.

You right.

But I need you to let me use your condo.

Just to get this. Just a date night.

It's one date night.

All right, man, I'ma let you use it, but just know

this lie is gonna come back to haunt you.

You better start telling the truth.

Man, I'ma start telling the truth

as soon as I get this lie off.

After this one. He's lying.

Yeah, he lying.

Do y'all have to be this far away from each other?

Momma, you wanna just be the bigger person?

Just scoot a little? Thank you.

There you go.

Okay, so I don't know exactly what's been going on

with y'all recently.

But I know you been mad at each other.

There's been some tension, you know.

And I've learned a lot of things in school

that I think will help y'all.

So, boom, pad, boom, pad.

We gonna try something.

What is all of this?

Daddy, silence, you gonna find out in a second.

[clears throat]

They're a few exercises

I'd like you both to participate in today, all right?

Uh, I'm game. Let's go.

You know I'm down to do it.

All right, well, thank you both.

So we're gonna start off with nonverbal communication.

Okay? As you can see on your pads are written

-the five love languages. -The five love languages.

[Jazmine] You already know what I'm getting at.

Excuse me, excuse me.

Uh, what exactly is a love language?

You really don't know

-what a love language is? -[Janine] It's okay.

Momma, how did he last this long?

Most guys don't know about... This is mostly a girl thing.

-Yeah, so... -Break it down to him, Momma.

So the five things listed here

are different foundational things

that you can use to know what your partner

values in the relationship as far as affection.

So she's asking you to just pick

one or two of the things that I do for you

from this list that make you feel loved.

Yes.

-Okay. -[Jazmine] Five love languages.

Circle your top one first.

All right.

[Jazmine] It's taking Daddy a while.

Physical touch.

Why am I not surprised?

Yeah, you see this one, "acts of service..."

Okay, okay, why don't you just show each other.

Before we move onto the other ones.

-Quality time. -[Jazmine] Aw.

Yes, I spend quality time.

No, you don't.

I'm spending quality time right now. This is quality time.

Look at that.

"Physical touch," that's the quality time

you like to spend.

All right, uh, second one, please.

Please circle that second one.

-Second favorite. -I don't have a second.

[Jazmine] Daddy, just pick, just pick one at this point.

Okay.

I will pick one.

-[Jazmine] Today, though. -There we go.

All right, show each other, please.

-Acts of service. -Acts of service.

All right, Mom, good one.

-Yes. -Thank you.

-Gifts. -Gifts. I like gifts.

You never like the gifts I give you.

No, you give me socks and ties.

Okay, okay, let's move on.

Let's not dwell on this. Close your eyes, please.

Both of y'all. Close your eyes.

All right, now clear your mind

of all negative thoughts about each other.

Of all negative thoughts? That's gonna be hard.

[Jazmine] Daddy. [smacks with paper]

I'm sorry.

Take a deep breath.

Let it out.

Yeah, keep it positive.

Only think positive thoughts. Remember the good times.

-The good times. Okay. -[Jazmine] Mm-hmm.

Jazmine, this actually does feel kind of good.

Feels good, right?

Yes, it's been a while

since I, uh, took a real deep breath.

See, God has been with y'all through the darkest times.

And He's pulled y'all through everything

with your faith rested on Him.

So, please remember the desires of your marriage

and of your family.

Picture what you want for the future

and then start speaking it into existence.

Thank you, Jazz, this has been eye-opening.

Yeah, and I guess,

you know, we do get a little caught up

in trying to be right.

Pride and egos get in the way.

And stubbornness and lack of communication

and not wanting to be heard.

Okay, we don't have to go, like, back down the list.

Remember, communication is key.

You know, being deliberate is key.

-Having faith is key. -[Janine] Is key.

-[Jazmine] All right? -Got it.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

You know, I don't know what they teaching you

at that school, but I love it.

Well, it's not just the school

it's everything I've learned from this family over the years.

Watching you two, watching Aunty Ella, Uncle Curtis.

I've really had some great examples.

Uncle Curtis?

Yeah, I don't know about Uncle Curtis.

Yeah, well, I've learned what not to do from him.

Ah.

He did raise me, so we gonna give him credit too.

We gonna give him credit. We love Uncle Curtis.

-And I love y'all. -[Janine] Love you.

I'm gonna give y'all a moment

to just sit and reflect, okay, love birds.

But y'all gonna have to figure out who to do this

without me, okay? I'm gonna have my own family soon.

Are you pregnant?

Not that soon. I mean, like, future, future.

[music]

[knock on door]

How you doing, baby?

Hey there, Big Daddy.

Ooh, I like it when you call me Big Daddy.

Look at you.

Looking just like your profile pic.

Thank you.

You kinda look like yours.

Yeah, okay.

Well, uh, you know, welcome to mi casa.

You know, mi casa es su casa.

Oh, you didn't say you speak Spanish.

Yeah, I know a little something something about the lingo.

Oh, so that mean you gonna be taking me overseas and stuff?

Hey! Wait.

I can't go out the country.

Damn, that would've been fun.

You can't... Okay, why not?

Why can't you? You scared of planes?

No, my probation won't allow it.

Probation? Okay, I...

I thought you said you worked in criminal justice.

You know, I'm in the criminal justice system,

and, boy, is it a lot of work.

I gotta hit up my PO every week,

let her know I'm doing community service.

Have to be looking for a job, all that bull...

Yeah, yeah, okay, you... All right.

But I'm glad you got a job.

Yeah, yeah.

So you gotta let me know, uh,

you know, how a beautiful woman like yourself

wound up with, you know, a criminal record.

Oh, well, I can't talk about that

'cause the case is still pending.

Still pending?

You-- it ain't no violent, ain't no murder...

I can't talk about it. Still pending.

[Peanut] No manslau...

Okay.

I thought I like hood chicks, but this takes the cake.

What was that?

Huh, I said, I said, you know how to bake.

Oh, no, I don't bake. I don't cook.

-That's doing way too much. -Oh, that's doing too much.

Yeah, you know, I just, I just thought

that I'll find a rich dude and maybe get married to him.

Yeah, sound like you ain't doing nothing.

So you ain't in it for the love?

Well, what's love got to do with it?

You know what I mean?

Love? What is love? What is love?

Yeah, that's what the site called, Love at First...

You know, don't worry about it. Don't worry about it.

Just go ahead and get your food.

Okay, 'cause I don't want it to get cold.

No, yeah.

Uh-uh, Big Daddy.

You can get a little closer,

but ain't gonna be no hanky panky up in here.

Oh, yeah, I know.

You know, I was just trying to make sure

-You was comfortable. -Oh, okay.

-Yeah, cozy. Yeah. -I'm a lady.

[Peanut] I know. I see you.

What the hell is going on up in here?

Um, it's a little late for cleaning.

And all that, so you might need to come back.

Yeah, it is a little late, lady. Come back tomorrow.

Peanut, you better get you and your little friend

up out my place before I do.

Whoa, whoa, calm down.

Peanut, why are you even here?

And who the hell is she?

Look, that's my fiancee. Okay?

Fiancee? Since when?

And turn the damn lights on!

Oh, snap.

Calvin, what you mean, "Oh, snap"?

Hmm?

Somebody better get to talking!

Uh, baby, can I holler at you over here?

[Laura] Yeah, let's holler.

[Peanut] Don't worry about that.

Look, I forgot to mention that I let Peanut

use the place to have a date night.

-Mm. -Wait a minute.

This ain't your place, Big Daddy?

[both] "Big Daddy"?

Look, yes, this is my place.

I let them stay here. They, like, tenants.

Boy.

I got several rental properties.

All right, look.

This ain't my place.

I'm lying. I don't live here.

And I'm not rich. I ain't no CEO.

And I'm not some rich dude that you can just scheme off of.

[chuckles] Hold the hell on.

Okay? Hold on.

You got me messed up. You got me messed up!

You would lie to me?

Girl, you was lying to me.

You were lying too, Ms. Criminal Justice,

-"case is pending." -Boy, please.

Okay? Lose my number.

Cheap butt or somethin' wasting my time.

I'm out of here.

-[Laura] There's the door. -I'm going.

[Peanut] Don't make me call your probation officer.

[music]

Look, Peanut, I'm sorry this happened.

I had my doubts, obviously,

but this wasn't the way to go about it.

Yeah. You right.

You know, it's just I was feeling left out.

Looking at everybody, I don't know,

I guess I just started getting desperate.

Man, don't be.

The right woman will come along when you least expect it.

You just gotta be ready for it.

What Laura and I have and Pookie and his wife have,

it's not based on a lie, it's based on the truth.

Mm, that's right, baby.

You right, Big Dawg.

For real, appreciate you. Thanks for everything, man.

I'll go ahead. Get up out of here.

Where you headed?

You know, I'm going to a strip club.

[Calvin and Laura chuckling]

Hey, can't let the suit go to waste.

You know what I'm saying?

[Calvin] That's my dawg. Get 'em, dawg.

Can you bring me back some lemon pepper wings

-I got you. -[Laura] Thank you.

So, date night?

-Date night is good. Yeah. -[Janine] Yeah?

Where you gonna take me?

Where you wanna go?

C.J., I'm so simple, I just...

Dinner and a movie is more than enough for me.

-Dinner and a movie it is. -[Janine] Yes.

Next Thursday night.

Okay. All right.

Dinner and a movie, and then we can start

to explore more of your love language.

Physical touch?

Physical [meows] [meows].

-I'll mess with that. -[Janine] Yeah?

[C.J.] Mm-hmm.

-Okay. -My juices is flowing...

Don't you start.

You gotta get past the acts of service

and the quality time first.

But we can get to a little physical touch right here.

[Janine] We don't need to do that.

Ain't nobody here, no kids around.

Don't come over here.

How about a little physical...

-[Janine] No. -[C.J.] Act of service

-on this table right here? -Physical act of service?

[music]

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