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Zulu
SAVAGE NIGHTS
for Thierry Ravel
for Lino Brocka
MOROCCO MARCH 1986
I feel I go through life like an American tourist...
see as many towns as possible.
Sagittarius always wants to be elsewhere.
And you? Were you like that? You were young too. That's life
It's like that.
It begins with dust and ends with dust!
It's like that.
Everywhere it's like that! Not just here.
I landed at a rainy Orly.
I bought a paper and saw that Jean Genet had died.
He once said:
Only violence can put an end to man's brutality.
When did that spot show up'?
Couple of weeks ago Nasty, no'?
Well, maybe we should take a little biopsy.
Okay.
- Alrightโ? - Yeah.
You don't use gloves?
No. They're too impractical.
Be careful.
Well, nobody lives forever.
I want locations today.
- No messing around! - Okay, keep cool.
Damn, Olivier! Don't block the light, idiot.
- Two hours... - Listen...
I don't want to do ads. I'm only here...
for your sake, not mine. So be nicer.
- What's up with him? - No chocolate this morning
Is that it?
Poor kids who make it want everyone to scrape and bow!
Praised be the minions and their cameras.
- What do you want? - Want everyone to do his job!
You want flunkies, is that it?
- The cameraman shall do his job. - Then don't mistreat people!
- Alright, let's go. - Come on, we'll get a take.
Sex was the only way you saw to rebel.
But you can change, if you want to.
Open up to others. Bare your soul.
Let go of yourself.
Let go of your illusions.
Learn from your disease.
I'm exhausted.
Hello.
- Laura? - Yes.
Kader Djalil. We've an appointment...
Was everything explained to you?
...vaguely.
It's an audition, okay?
- How old are you? - 18.
I have your photos. Come here.
- Where did you get them? - Your agent sent them, didn't he'?
I don't have an agent.
Kader, I gave you her photos. I found them in a box in the hall.
You did well.
Hi.
Jean, directory of photography.
- He does the lighting, etc. - I know, I know...
Okay. Do you ride?
No, a friend brought me on his bike.
Okay. Get the camera.
Laura, we'll improvise.
I'll give you the cue. The theme is jealousy, okay?
Need to talk for a video clip?
Not a video, a commercial.
- I thought it's a video. - No, it's a commercial.
- Is that okay? - I don't mind.
- It's not so different. - No...
Alright, look at me.
Not too far away. I want to catch her eyes.
- Okay, rolling... - Where have you been?
- For a walk. -Where to? - Just around.
Who are you fooling?
I walked around.
Who's that guy you met? Just a guy...
I see around. I say hello to him.
You look like you've just been screwed.
Now you're going too far. You're talking rubbish.
Very good. Now repeat it but try to dominate!
Look at me, okay?
Look at me, Laura.
- Look at me! - I'll look where I want!
What do you want?
Wanna return to the shit where picked you up'?
- I find someone else. - You won't find anyone.
- No one loves you like do. - What do you know about love?
Go to the window.
It's the wolfhound.
- All right? - Yeah.
- Cut. Not bad, wasn't it? - Good? -Yeah.
Samy?
Jean, come look.
- What do you think? - Go on, shoot.
- You'd had a scoop if had fallen! - You mean, if had fallen.
Wouldn't it have been good if I'd fallen?
Answer my question.
What makes you think I want to film...
- to film death? - To make money...
- You okay? - Yeah.
- And you? - I'm fine.
- Remember Jean? - I guess so. Hello.
- How are you? - Yeah. I'm fine.
I want to go home.
Just go, I'll stay for a while.
- I'll come soon. - Okay.
Come on.
Let's go!
- Oh, come on! - No!
- Here's a towel. - Thanks.
You know about rail surfers?
- I'd like to film them. - No need to go to Rio.
I could do it for you.
Thought you only did music You film news as well?
What's your story?
I am... me.
You like guys?
You think?
I'm asking you...
Lie down...
I won't rape you.
Shit!
Marianne will rip me.
Oh, come on! You can handle it.
Find me a job.
Blackmail, huh? You sleep with me if find you a job?
No!
You don't understand.
Well, come on...
Take off your jacket.
Don't look like that, you'll survive!
Visit the night of the man sentenced to death within yourself.
Stripping yourself of flesh, you climb over death...
Look the world straight in the eye.
We hadn't finished talking of love...
Hadn't finished smoking our Gitanes...
How can courts sentence to death...
A murderer so beautiful as to make the sun look pale?
Hi, Laura. It's Jean.
Remember me? We met at the audition
I'd like to see you.
I keep thinking about you.
It's ages I felt something like this.
Like what?
Like a kid again.
A new feeling where you ask no questions.
Like the first girl I ever flirted with.
She was a friend of my cousin.
I was 15 and a virgin. We rode mopeds in the forest.
You lost your virginity?
No, we didn't make love.
My first time I was 13.
He was a filthy rich surgeon.
He had a Porsche.
He was 25 years older than me.
I remember... one night he took me to a nightclub.
We danced all night. I said to myself:
This guy wants to fuck me.
I was disgusted but I knew I'd do it anyway.
I went to the toilets...
and looked in the mirror.
I had shadows round my eyes.
I felt ten years older...
Not very glamorous, for the first time.
- I can't imagine it. - What. -Never mind.
- That he was surgeon? - No, that you were 13...
Your hair's all tangled.
What are these little stars?
I went to a party last night, dressed up as a fairy.
Go on, open it.
I love huskies!
It's the wolfhound.
Too bad Kader didn't use you for the ad.
No big deal. Mom didn't want me to do it anyway.
- You said you're over 18. - I'm only 17.
Do you often lie?
It makes the world bearable.
It's funny...
My little fag...
Want a drink?
Another vodka. And you?
The usual, a wine.
I take reality as it comes, day by day
and I kiss it.
Welcome to reality.
For me, reality's getting up at 7:00 for work.
Is that all? You must be unhappy.
Yeah.
You're lucky to be so easily unhappy.
There are so many more sophisticated ways.
You don't know real misfortune,
compared with working-class gloom.
And when night falls, my dreams are of him.
Of my man... Chorus!
Of her man...
Not that he's good-looking, or rich, or strong, but I love him...
It's stupid, I know...
He beats me up, oh yeah! He steals my money, oh no!
But in spite of everything what can do...?
It's a bit too low for me!
I've got him under my skin. I just go crazy.
He'd get me to do anything, I swear I'd even kill...
I go all funny,
when he runs his hands over me...
Back in position!
Quick! Come on!
Move yourselves!
Come on, one more time. Catch it with both hands!
Samy, are you ready?
Get the bailout! Go, Samy!
The pack needs working on.
- I don't know! He has hired them. - So what?
Who's up for some fun at Monsieur Andre?
No thanks.
Damn, the water's off again.
- Do you always drive like this? - Always.
Who is Mr Andre?
An old bitch!
I want a sandwich, a big one.
Over there.
No good here. Try over there...
Have you lightened your hair?
No, you only never looked at me.
It's odd. I have a good memory.
But I never seem to remember people's eyes and hair.
People's? I'm not people!
- Shall we go? - Where to?
- Your place. - My place is a real mess.
It doesn't matter.
You're unbelievable.
Guys usually want to screw me after five minutes.
You just wait. Should, shouldn't
Are you teasing me?
I have to tell you...
I like guys, too.
I know.
- You do? - Yes.
Well, I assumed.
- But you don't care? - Do care.
- Look! -What? - The babe over there!
Try your luck.
No, go yourself.
What's the matter with you?
Are you kidding? Go yourself.
Good evening.
My friend's got a crush on you.
It's true.
He's Samy. And you?
Sylvie.
- And you? - I'm Jean.
Wanna have a drink with us? Over there?
- Nearby? - Yeah.
Let's go.
Don't worry, we won't eat you!
Come in.
Nice place!
This is where Dali met his wife Gala.
- Where are you from? - Switzerland.
I study art history at the Sorbonne.
- Did you plan to buy sexy panties at Pigalle? - Exactly.
But I didn't reach to buy any.
Make yourself at home.
Would that be wise?
Tell me, who's your favourite painter?
I haven't decided yet.
What are you doing?
He's my man.
You're kidding.
That's not cool!
Damn, she won't let me fuck her.
I understand her.
- What is it? - Can't sleep alone
- Can get in? - Of course...
Laura please.
In the Sloth family, I want the mother!
Okay, she's here!
You want a little cuddle?
Can't sleep alone any more
You'd rather sleep with your mom?
Whats that?
Don't mind sleeping alone?
What a question!
I know you're next door.
But you're alone in bed.
Stop it, Laura.
- Without a man. - What should I do with a man?
What will your mom say if you're late?
I'm not a kid any more
Your hair's really long.
When did you last cut it?
Seven years ago.
Hey, stop it!
- Are you ticklish? - You bet.
You have lovely breasts.
Yes. I swear. They're pretty.
Small breasts used to be the fashion.
It's true, I swear!
I want to tell you something.
What?
- What? - Nothing. don't know
What are you laughing at?
Nothing.
- Do I make you laugh? - No. Must be the nerves.
- Are you afraid? - Maybe.
- Are you crying or laughing? - Both.
Pace, come to the table
I'm sick of your paellas, can't stand them any more!
Stop it, Pace!
- Don't you like paella? - She messes them up.
- No... - Yes.
Stop drinking, Pace!
Has Marianne been here?
No.
- Did say something? - No, why?
I don't know. I just felt I screwed up.
- Been here long? - About six years.
That's to say... we left Samy's father.
I met Pablo... then we moved to Paris.
I began working in cafes.
Just like that. To help us on our way.
One day I met a Dutchman. Quite nice really.
He was an animal! Drank fingerbowls in restaurants!
Did your mom work around here?
In the clubs.
She never went with customers...
Well... very rarely.
I once tried to be a hustler.
- You? - Yeah.
- Did you need money? - No.
In Rue Sainte-Anne.
I went to a shady hotel with a drunken Italian.
He got undressed and we got into bed.
I wanted cash in advance...
We started to argue! We almost fought.
Eventually I just left.
A big black bird...
Who has lost his memory...
But still greedy for life...
Running wild...
Alright... This is how I am...
Alright... That's why...
You're running away...
Beyond monotony...
That's good. You could make a record.
I actually made one with Marc.
- I can't do everything. - If you don't try.
I had no choice.
It's just saying no.
I can't say no, I never learned it.
Do you have a T-shirt?
In the closet.
- This one? - In the corridor
- Were you writing? - Yeah.
What about?
Why didn't you come?
It's the same.
You came, so it's all right. That's the main thing.
I thought men care only about their own pleasure.
Especially gays.
What do you know about gay men?
Do you mind if jerk off?
No.
Why did you call me?
I slept with Laura. I didn't tell her I'm HIV positive.
It was like a dream.
Like I'd forgotten the virus was part of me.
I felt nothing can happen because we're in love.
Is it love...
or are you just kidding yourself?
Perhaps both.
I do can awful things. But when I go back to her, I feel clean.
For the pure ones everything is pure.
- Saint John? - No, Saint Paul.
Are you sure?
What you do with guys?
Really wanna know?
Safe things.
Five minute hand jobs under bridges.
- Shocked? - No.
- You know... - I know.
We never talked like this before.
We wanted to, but couldn't.
That's right.
Jean...
you must tell her.
You must.
You have to be brave.
I never get angry.
Yeah, always serene.
Do your possum.
- What? - Do it.
Which kind?
A very possummy one.
A lustful possum!
Don't look like that! You make me come.
- You remembered! - No.
Again, again.
You're a big girl now. Blow out all at once.
Pathetic.
Thank you.
Oh no, the cake!
Wait, he's cutting it up.
I want it now. I want it all to myself.
G reedy!
Come here, Laura. I must tell you something.
What's wrong?
You know I've been with lots of guys.
Some strange ones.
Perhaps we should be careful.
Careful about what?
I had an AIDS test. It was positive.
- Did you know it before we made love? - Yes.
You didn't tell me?
You knew and you didn't tell me!
I don't believe it...
How could you do a thing like that?
It's outrageous! You're a monster!
How long have you known?
A few months...
Don't make judgements.
You have no idea...
No and I don't care. You should have told me!
It was the least you could do!
Not a word.
Do you realize...
We made love and you didn't say anything.
I thought nothing could happen to you.
Even if nothing could happen to me, you should have told me.
I don't know how to explain... It's as if...
it isn't part of me if you understand what I mean.
I... I can't take it in.
But you thought about it...
I'm sure you did, while we made love.
And you didn't tell me.
- You don't trust me. - That's not the point.
- I want you to come. - Stop it, stop it!
Since you told me you're HIV positive...
I stopped to care about myself.
I'm worried about you.
It mustn't come between us.
Promise?
Yes, me too.
Swear you'll take care of yourself.
But I can't live without him.
You're not the only one. Other people love you, too.
Think about them.
Can't any more. Can only think of him
So don't count any more?
I need you, too.
Don't leave me...
Listen... let's make a trip, okay?
I don't want to. You don't understand.
Of course not.
- I can't. - I don't understand.
I can't live without him.
Don't get so upset!
- It's so hopeless - What?
No hope.
Pull yourself together.
You're in love, that's all.
- H I. - You okay?
Mom, this is Jean.
- Pleased to meet you. - Likewise.
Aren't you hungry? Is it bad?
- I hate food like this. - Aren't you eating? -No.
- You don't drink either? - No. -He doesn't smoke?
- What keeps you going? - AZT.
Very funny.
Do what you want with your life. But don't wreck my daughter's.
- Is that funny? - No. Not funny.
He'll never change. Leave him.
What is this?
Aren't you ashamed, accepting all this...
- Have you no pride? - I love him as he is.
You want a cosy home boy.
- Well, I don't. - Poor thing.
- Everybody was young once. - You don't look your age. -Thanks...
You're mocking me now?
I've got better things to do than listen to this nonsense.
You offended her.
Wasn't nasty, was?
No, she's just nuts.
- He's got your nose. - Very funny!
Hello. I've come for Maurice.
Who's Maurice?
You'll see.
- For me? - Yep. That's Maurice
Hi Maurice!
- What a great dog! - Cute, isn't he'?
I'm really happy
You've been here for two weeks and we haven't had a fight.
It never happened to me.
Two weeks isn't long, but it's a good start.
Those slippers are a nightmare.
Why?
You look like an old man.
Little old man!
What's wrong? They're great.
Hello.
Yes. Yes, I'm fine...
Tonight?
It'll match my skirt.
Not bad.
Everything okay! Mme Serein?
Fine.
Laura!
Excuse us...
How often have told you no chewing gum at work?
Out!
- Give me my money. - Get out! -Okay...
- What are you doing? - I like this one. I think I'll take it.
- It's a shame you have no class. - Very well.
Bye old bitch.
Wait. You won't ever work around here again.
If I report your moonlighting, it'll cost you... old bitch!
Do that. Now get lost! Stupid cunt.
- I think I'll go to film school. - Very original!
What have said now?
- You don't care if I'm homeless. - But you aren't.
Am. Mom threw me out 'cause lost my job
She's a dragon.
No, not at all. Put yourself in her shoes.
- What was he like at my age? - Cheeky.
But sensible also.
I saw Frederic Toussaint yesterday at the theatre.
He said to me: No, it can't be true. Jean isn't positive.
He just says that for effect. Anyway, he's not even sexual.
- Are you bisexual? - No...
Disappointed?
Never tried it with a guy?
- Not even with Jean? - We probably messed a bit at school.
Do you never smoke? You're a health freak, huh?
Once a year it's okay.
This stuff is expensive.
I'm only hooked because of that girl.
- Go on a caper - Oh common...
Don't start like your gangster dad.
Did all his hold-ups and 8 years prison help you?
You're like all those other fools. You think nothing happens to you.
- That's not being a rebel! - Oh yeah? -But yes.
- What's a rebel? - A rebel is marked by fate and has real dignity inside.
That's it.
- '70s talk! - It's not.
Jaime's a Highway Robin Hood.
Steals from the rich to give to the poor.
Now it's just motorways...
Do you mind I talk to Samy?
He's cute... Good taste...
- Thanks. - He's a bitch.
You can talk. Asshole.
Aren't you a bit selfish?
Be nice now.
You bastard! Are you satisfied now?
Now piss off!
She's crazy!
Common Laura
I don't care what's with Samy.
It's a party, common
Why do you do this? What's wrong with you?
Vero told me of your last girlfriend.
That you drove her crazy.
What's this crap?
She got nerve trouble and ended up paralysed.
You evil bitch.
Didn't it happen?
Shit-talk! Piss off.
Wait! Is it true that Maria taught you what a woman is?
- Don't touch me. - Calm down.
- You disgust me! - Calm down.
Laura! What's wrong with you?
You're unable to love me.
Unable to love me.
You prefer that little whore.
If you could see how pathetic you are.
He turns you on but you don't love him either.
You don't love life.
You drain everyone but what do you give?
Why's it like this all the time? Shit!
You're responsible for it, just you!
I want everything to be good again.
I'll go to Nice tomorrow...
to visit my granny. She's the only person I trust.
- Will you stay long? - Dunno.
Will you meet your dad?
Bah! My dad is in Spain with a tart my age. The jerk.
When you get back, we'll try to live together.
We'll see. I don't know if I'm ready.
- Yes? - Mom, it's me.
- What's going on? - I'd like to sleep here
Well, come up.
NO goodbye?
Sometimes I do anything to forget I'm wasting away.
Can you imagine dealing with that all day long. Every single minute?
Nothing will happen to you. I'm sure.
- Take care. - You too.
Nothing will happen to you! What does an 18-year-old kid know?
I only think about myself.
I'm just made up of pieces put together without a plan.
I wonder who infected me. I don't wanna blame anyone.
I see blurred faces change into images of the virus.
- Evening. - Evening. Come in.
- You know the house rules. - Yes, of course!
Everybody's here?
You aren't bored?
- Look there. - How are you?
Haven't seen you for ages!
What are you waiting for? Take off your clothes!
Hang on.
Andre provides the girls, but he gets a pay-off.
You have to please him first.
Coming?
A rugby player. My darlings!
More.
You love it?
- Saturday's training. - I know.
You're leaving?
No fun with the chicks?
- No. - Don't like girls?
I do...
- You did well for a new-comer. - Leave us alone...
I'm Pierre-Olivier.
- And you? - Samy.
I've got something for you.
We should meet again.
Call me?
- Ever heard of alchemy? - Yeah.
May come in?
Of course! What is it? Are you sick?
Aren't you alone?
I was sleeping.
I was dreaming about Laura.
Her face was rotten...
and her cheeks...
were hollowed out and pale...
Her hair was greasy and twisted in a bun...
and she had blue rings around her eyes...
She was a witch, huh?
- I don't feel like it. - Like what?
Like screwing, not tonight.
If I touch you it doesn't mean I want to screw you.
- What happened tonight. - Nothing.
What happened?
I'm sorry.
I feel like throwing up...
Sol did it hit him.
And I couldn't stop.
As if it wasn't me.
I even had a hard-on.
It's really true!
This is Jean. Leave a message...
...after the beep and I'll call you back. Goodbye.
Hi. It's Laura.
I'm still in Nice.
It's 3:00 am and I can't sleep.
Answer!
I know you're there...
I don't care if you're with a guy.
Just answer.
I know you're not alone. I can tell you're with Samy.
But I don't care.
Just pick up the phone!
Why are you doing this? It's pointless.
Damn. It's 3:00 am.
I've come for my things. I move in with Jean.
Hi Marianne.
What are you saying?
- Is this a joke? - No, why?
- Why are you here? - Brought him.
I don't understand.
- Can we talk a minute? - Where are my gloves?
Give us 5 minutes.
- No, wait - What?
Can we talk just for a moment?
- Listen, Marianne. - I love you.
- Marianne. Listen to me. - You can't just leave. -Listen.
I'll move in with him for two months.
Stay a minute. You're taking him away!
I knew straight away!
Cool it! It isn't...
I don't care! The two of you are not leaving together.
Taking my man, just like that. You must be joking!
Stop it. Why're you acting this way?
Because I won't put up with this!
It's ridiculous!
You don't get it. I'll stay with him for two months.
I'm telling you... you're messing up his life.
He doesn't need me for that.
Ciao.
Why are you here?
Well, come in...
Like a herbal tea? I was going make some.
- Isn't Jean here? - No.
I'd never thought you're a herbal tea guy.
- Are you living here? - Here and there.
- Where's your girlfriend? - In England, I think.
She writes about dog fighting. Pitbull terriers.
- Have you heard of them? - No.
- Not heard? - No.
They're dogs that tear each other apart.
Do you sleep with Jean?
I'm not gay
It would be in your interest.
You've no idea what interests me! I'm not after money or glory.
I wanna live my life.
A bit of excitement, get it?
Isn't fucking Jean exciting?
You've got a problem...
You can't think about anything else.
- Will you stay for a long time? - Don't know yet...
I don't think you will.
- Oh really? - Yeah.
H ow do you know?
Cause Jean's like that People come and go.
True. So how come you're still here?
- Live here - You do?
- They come and go but you stay? - Exactly.
You're lucky.
But one day, someone will take your place.
Maybe, but not you.
You're good at it.
You despise Jean.
Stop it. Let go, relax.
How can you sleep with someone you despise?
You'd do anything not to lose him,
even let me fuck him.
You're wrong.
It's not true.
Sorry, Samy. We won't make love.
More parking fines...
- You okay? - Fine. How was Nice?
Well, you see...
This girl was in bed with Bendl.
And... they get undressed and so on
and Bendl says, What about a blow job?
So the girl goes down on him
and she sees tattooed on his cock the word AIDS.
The girl freaks out and says, Are you sick or what?
So Bendl says...
Don't worry. Just do it.
So she gets going, he gets a hard-on...
Then she realizes it doesn't say AIDS, it says ADIDAS.
You're a pain, smoking while we still eat.
Don't preach. You with your red wine...
And you and your Coke and pizza! Kids today!
He tried to screw me earlier.
I'm not surprised, he has no scruples.
But she wants only your cock! It's true.
C'mon!
Pretty pathetic, two guys together!
I want you to help me forget you...
Not desire you any more
I don't wanna break up.
How do you love me? What kind of love?
I prefer my memories of you...
And try to change erect... I mean, direction!
I wanna be myself again...
Going out, meeting men...
Not expect anything from anyone.
Do you know this one? Listen...
It's dark and you take it...
And you roll it...
It's strong and pungent like wood...
It makes you drunk...
First I was a punk. I had a Mohawk.
One day an Arab hit my pregnant girlfriend.
I was furious. I shaved my head.
- That's not funny, miss - And Pierre-Olivier?
He was National Front, but he quit.
They didn't like us, we cramped their style.
They're cowards. Let the wogs take over.
What are wogs?
We call them wogs. They're like rats.
- Finished, thickhead? - Shut up bastard! -Nazi lover!
The skinheads are attacking Arabs!
Fucker!
- He hasn't come yet. - I love you.
Hey, Samy! What have you done?
Pace, what're you doing here?
I ran away. She made paella again!
- Go to bed now! - You're a pain...
After the fight, I thought about my dad.
I wanted to meet him in Spain to suggest a hold-up.
- Samy, I know your father's in jail. - So what?
- Sleep tight, Pace. - Aren't you sleeping with me?
I'll take you to Seville to see Dad. I promise.
Are you a gay now or what?
I wanna make love with you.
Use a condom.
- I haven't got one. - In the bathroom.
I don't want to.
Do you know what you're doing?
Yes.
What did you say earlier?
Nothing.
Samy, not without a condom.
Don't touch the papers, Rosa.
Aren't you coming?
No.
I love you.
- I want to be with you. - I'm here.
No, you're not.
You can't get him out of your head.
- What's up'? - Common, we're going
He must fuck you, at least.
I bet he doesn't.
I bet you drool like a dog, making bulgy eyes.
In hope of sex every 2nd week, that's it!
Shut up!
- Why follow me like a dog? - We're going out!
What's so special about you?
You weren't even first to make me come.
- Hey, are you pregnant? - Of course am.
- Didn't you notice? - No.
Well, it's about time.
How's it going?
Okay. At first, I felt like throwing up all those pills.
But AZT is quite important How's your T-cell count?
Just under 200.
Well, it can increase it. Keep trying.
But can't drink, can't be reckless any more
Hi Karine.
What are you doing here?
Eating all alone?
Sake, sweetie?
- Serve your chick first. - Ex-chick.
- We're still friends, no'? - Now we are. -Good pals
Candied spider's legs?
Very funny...
Picked up another hotty totty?
She doesn't need a machine to straighten bananas.
You're disgusting!
- Is that ginger? - Yep, ginger lights my fire...
Tuna?
No thanks. I really hate raw meat.
Do you know the story about the TGV? (high-speed train)
Camille, do you know it?
- It's the inauguration of the TGV... - I dunno that one.
First class carriage, champagne, classy people... sake etc...
There's a woman, about 50, who says: It's extraordinary, you feel nothing.
When the train arrives in Lyon, the same woman says:
Extraordinary. You feel nothing. Quite extraordinary!
- Wanna to hear what I'm recording? - Sure.
What the hell is this? I'm not dying!
Jean, calm down.
You piss me off, I'm not dying!
Calm down!
Stop it! Stop!
Calm down, Jean.
- Why did you go out with me? - Loved you.
Yeah, and why are you with me?
- Calm down. - I'm your friend.
I want to live! I don't want to die!
Why did he say that?
Forget it. He's drunk.
- Why did he say that? - He drank too much!
Let him go, it's okay.
I'll take you home.
Calm down... Calm down.
Listen, calm down, okay?
- Hey, c'mon. - I'm the strongest.
Hey, cut it out!
- What are you doing? - You'll see.
We won't make love...
I wouldn't, anyway.
- Why not? - I'll tell you later
- What's he doing? - I dunno.
Step one is the purging of Satan's work.
Samy, you're crazy!
You do it.
- You're so tough! - I don't fake.
You think it's all about pain?
M. Jean, are you there?
- What're you doing here? - Surprise!
Do you screw every moving thing?
Who's this hysterical cow? Where'd they dig you out?
- Is this funny? - Pretty funny.
You find it funny?
- Upper-class whore... - No one calls me that!
That whore better move her fat ass.
Wanna see my ass?
I'll show you my ass...
Fuck off, bitch!
Stop! You're completely nuts!
Is this what you do while I'm away?
Enough! Calm down.
You're out of your mind!
Oh my god! You're like two dogs fighting for a bone.
- You're the bone? - Yeah.
Are you getting a boner from seeing people suffer?
Stop that shit! You're not the only one...
who suffers in this world! Everyone suffers, so cut it!
- We didn't even screw. - Exactly.
- I wish I'd done it. - Calm down.
- Don't touch me! - Easy...
Who is this bitch anyway?
Enough, shut up now!
Come her, yelling, wake everyone up...
Shut up! Holy shit. What the fuck...
Do something, don't just stand there!
What have done? I'd better remained gay
With furies like you two... Impossible.
This is not about love. To be possessive like this.
As if you're not possessive.
Do you love him?
I only spent the night here.
I needed some tenderness. He also.
We've shared wonderful moments.
He gets tenderness from me, get it?
It's different. It's not the same thing.
I'm also in love with someone, it's not the same.
Sometimes, you need to go elsewhere. Understand?
I give him everything and he returns nothing, understand?
So either you go, or I do.
You let me down when wipe your tears?
I tell you, either me or you go.
Somethings boiling inside me.
It was almost over but now it starts again.
I comfort you but you push me away. I could kill you, understand?
- Come on. - It's easy for you, huh?
It's not at all easy to be stuck like an idiot between you two.
Perhaps I asked for it.
No one may take this away from us.
We're all that counts.
Your father found your old paintings.
Why did you give it up'?
Does he know I'm HIV positive?
Yes.
And?
He said, Nothing will happen to him.
You know, sometimes, since his operation...
wonder who of us will be first It's awful, isn't it?
I've often thought the same.
Why're you so crazy about that girl?
- You prefer me with guys? - None of my business.
We never interfered.
Only when I for the first time came home with that Danish boy.
You didn't love him.
- Nor any of the others - How you know?
Jean...
this...
this virus can give you the ability to love.
- Do you know what love is? - Did once.
Why did you never show it. You never touched each other, you and Claude?
It's difficult to talk...
It's difficult... to touch...
- I was always afraid of you. - Children aren't scary.
Why did you stop working?
I told you for years to go back to work.
There was your father, and you...
It was hard. I felt guilty.
I said to myself I'm neglecting them, I don't spend enough time with them.
In the end, you stifle them.
Messing up a life isn't easy.
- You didn't mess up yours. - Not really...
Sometimes I feel I did, concerning you.
Think of yourself instead of everyone else.
Be selfish sometimes.
Come, dinner's ready.
Are you daydreaming?
Claude, carve the roast. Let's eat while it's hot.
- You asleep? - What do you think?
I got back late. An accident...
Yeah, some jerk violated my priority.
I knew something would happen, but you'd be okay.
You're clairvoyant now? Call me early in the morning
Don't fuck with me now!
Do hairdressers work at night now?
Like it? Cool, huh?
Was at Monsieur Andre last night.
Nothing else to do?
Everything pisses me off, even Marianne.
This pisses me off!
You don't know everything. Don't fool yourself!
I only try to help you...
but I can stop it and just let you die!
Hello! I own that lamp shop down here.
We're renovating. It may become quite noisy.
Please accept this champagne with our apologies.
It's very kind. Thanks.
What a clown!
Hi, it's Laura...
So you're still not there...
I've nothing to tell you. I was bored all day.
I'm scared. I need to talk to you. Answer, please...
Hi, it's Laura again.
I'm sorry to call so often.
I can't get you so I'm talking to your machine.
It's more faithful than making love with Samy.
I'll keep calling โtil you answer so your line's busy...
Tomorrow, the day after... all day, all night.
So if Hollywood calls to offer you work...
I love you more than I've ever loved anyone.
You've no right to ruin everything.
I don't get it.
I love you. All those guys... it's so fucking disgusting.
How can you waste your life like that...
when offer all happiness anyone could give you?
I'll give you everything. They give you nothing.
Piss on me.
Horoscope speaking:
I'll tell your fortune. Your luck has run out.
Death is looming, I see it all.
What I'm doing scares me.
Those who humiliate others will be punished.
Punished by whom?
I'll put your apartment on fire...
and any other place you and Samy try to live.
You really want me to take vengeance?
You, your family, your friends, you're all going to die!
I won't let you make me suffer all alone!
Laura! Put that phone down!
- Put the phone down! - Have you ever heard of Hell?
That's enough!
Give it to me, I'm talking. Get out!
I'm fed up with this guy!
I hate you, I hate you!
Calm down! It's incredible what he manages to do to you!
Calm down Laura. Stop it!
- Do really think that's love? - Yeah, do.
Making his life hell?
He makes my life a hell.
So you make each other's life a hell. What's the point?
I'm going to bed. Coming?
Hello? This is Laura's mother
I'm calling because I don't know what to do.
She won't sleep or eat any more.
She throws up everything. It's intolerable.
She says she needs a word from you.
You believe her?
Break up then. Tell her it's over.
Don't say that!
Hallo. Say it isn't over.
Your mother said that, not me.
Why can't you be with a normal guy, instead of a fruit...
who's buggered by 4 punks every day?
So your hysterical mother's normal? You think you're normal?
I'm going back to bed. Bunch of masochists!
- That was it. - That was what?
He hung up.
What can do? Just tried to talk to him
Call him a fruit!
- It's the truth. - You're vulgar.
- Vulgar... - You're stupid!
Go to your room.
- Laura! - Fuck off!
I don't want that champagne...
He and his shitty jobs
How interesting... Mr Neon man, fuck your champagne.
Asshole!
He should be locked up. He's sick.
Sorry?
I've decided.
Firstly, you're going to move out. Secondly, you'll leave Samy.
Thirdly, you never look at other men.
Finally, I leave you.
You'll be alone.
All alone...
I wish you all the best.
It could be so easy...
if you'd only choose peace and quiet...
Love with a capital L.
But you only destroy yourself.
Everything could've been good your health, work...
But you don't care and destroy yourself.
You want it that way.
They're all lying and saying how great you are.
But the truth is you're a spineless coward.
Hello.
I'd like some sleeping pills. Strong ones.
I pity you, which is the worse.
As if you haven't done enough. I can never have children.
You don't care. You won't get away with it!
I'll tell the whole world what you've done!
I didn't tell you I had a HIV test.
I'm HIV positive...
You infected me, you monster!
I wanna die!
- It's him! All because of him! - Stop it!
Look!
Look what you've done to my life!
Open up, Laura. Stop this bullshit.
Calm down before someone calls the police.
Fuck the police!
Go home if you want to make a scene.
Laura, stop it! Open the door.
Laura, I can't help you if you don't open up.
Open up... come on. Open it.
He lets me die. Can't fight any more
I'll love him beyond death.
Listen...
Stop it! You're crazy!
What's wrong with you? Stop it!
Show me...
You fucked me up.
I'm fucked up.
Go ahead, jump.
Do you think can't do it?
- What's going on? - Who's this?
I'm the caretaker.
Identity papers, please!
- Calm down... - I don't want.
- He doesn't want me. - Stop getting upset.
I'm pretty, aren't?
- Only have my license - That'll do.
- You want to go to hospital? - No!
- It's for your own best. - Shut up! I said no!
Sure?
We can't force her.
- What's going on? - Excuse me. -Mom!
Laura, what happened?
Nothing, it's over now.
- What? - Nothing
What do you mean nothing?
You can rest. A clinic will be better than home.
A clinic? A outhouse, you mean!
No darling. I promise it's very good.
Nice, full of wonderful people.
I've talked with them. They'll take care of you.
- I don't believe it! - Laura, please...
You can make it good again. Just make love to me.
- Make love to me. - Stop it, Laura.
I wanna your dick inside me. Give it to me.
You don't understand. No one ever made you come like that...
- Yeah, that's right, dear. - Take me away.
Look! It's the wolfhound...
When you find another girl, maybe you'll be able to love her.
Yes, perhaps.
In Algeria my father had an orange grove.
We had to leave in '62.
I met Laura's father in Marseilles.
His family were Spanish republicans.
Laura's birth was an accident. We divorced right away.
Don't worry, we're not going to lock her up.
She'll be better upstairs.
What's it like?
- Everything will be fine - You sure? -Yes.
- May have a word? - I'd like to talk with you too
I won't tell you the whole story.
Have Laura an HIV tested but don't tell her.
Don't move away to try to save me.
Who can tell exactly...
What rage is...
A rustling murmur...
Or a thundering storm?
Being able to say no...
To the siren's call...
Or to roar like a lion...
who enters the arena...
Laura!
- How are you? - Fine.
You look much better.
It's the sea, the wind!
- Who's your boyfriend? - Christophe?
That's him.
Do you love him?
- I like him a lot. - You like him a lot.
Are you with anybody?
What about Samy?
I hardly ever see him.
It's not my business...
You used to think so.
I've changed, Laura.
I keep changing.
It's too late.
- I wanna make love to you. - But I don't want.
Not any more. Can't be true to two persons
It's sad to be with a guy you don't love.
I wanted to share my life with you...
but it was impossible.
You're never satisfied.
Always wanting something else, I can't live like that.
Stop searching will kill you.
- Not everyone's like that. - Right.
You taught me so much about solitude.
Then I wanted your child.
And the disease between us.
Like a stranger watching us.
Why did you lie?
At one point, I really thought I was HIV positive.
I wanted to share everything.
All's fair in love and war
Kiss me...
On the lips...
A little kiss...
- He didn't see, swear - Are you sure?
I see the blond child in Laura's arms and I really believe it's ours.
I ask myself: How can we have such a blond child?
Your brother's really an idiot.
Stop, they may be here.
Look over there.
- What? - Over there
See what this is?
Can you feel it? I'm going to enjoy this
After this even your mother won't recognize you.
It's enough.
We'll cut off your balls.
Fuck you, fat bastard!
Make him eat them.
Here go your balls...
Pierre-Olivier! I'm HIV positive. Anyone who touches me gets it!
Who is this asshole?
I know him. He's not kidding.
You have no shame.
Let's talk.
It's useless to talk to people like you.
Call them off, or you'll eat it.
Go on, do it!
Piss off, lucky bastard!
Go to that red Fiat near the bar.
Don't be so proud.
- Where you going? - Fuck off!
Laura,
this evening I came from the ring road
heading towards Port de la Chapelle.
I stopped at a traffic light.
Four teens crossed the road.
The boys were holding the girls' hands.
To see them hold their hands hurt me terribly.
A glimpse of what you wanted, what I could never give you.
What you need with 20.
One day I'll overcome whatever stops me take your hand
and whisper words of love.
I've no right to ask you to wait. You have your own life.
But if you can help me to live, please do it...
Laura? It's Jean.
Where're you?
The edge of Europe.
Just say a word and I'll come back.
I'm alive.
The world isn't just something that goes on around me.
I'm a part of it.
It's a gift to me.
Perhaps I'll die from AIDS, but it's no longer my life.
I'm part of life.
Original subtitles: felacity
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